1 00:00:15,476 --> 00:00:19,608 Oh, that is beautiful in so many ways. 2 00:00:19,943 --> 00:00:20,940 Shut up. 3 00:00:21,195 --> 00:00:23,106 Hey, happy anniversary. 4 00:00:23,366 --> 00:00:24,530 Happy anniversary, baby. 5 00:00:24,744 --> 00:00:28,827 Oh, man, I wanna take you right here with Betty Crocker watching. 6 00:00:30,045 --> 00:00:31,541 Come on, honey, I gotta get this ready. 7 00:00:31,757 --> 00:00:35,211 People are gonna be here at 2, and it's already like 20 of. 8 00:00:35,431 --> 00:00:37,092 "Like 20 of"? 9 00:00:37,309 --> 00:00:42,059 I think a certain person's anniversary gift can tell us the exact time. 10 00:00:43,404 --> 00:00:44,686 One thirty-seven. 11 00:00:45,450 --> 00:00:46,565 Isn't it great? Look at that. 12 00:00:46,786 --> 00:00:49,742 It's a ring, it's a watch. It's a ring, it's a watch. 13 00:00:50,209 --> 00:00:51,372 Are you done now? 14 00:00:51,837 --> 00:00:53,463 - Ring, watch. - Honey, stop. 15 00:00:53,674 --> 00:00:55,003 Now, come on, make yourself useful. 16 00:00:55,218 --> 00:00:57,712 Go get me the champagne flutes from the armoire. 17 00:00:58,516 --> 00:01:00,345 Okay, skinny glasses, big cabinet. 18 00:01:00,604 --> 00:01:02,563 Oh, all right. I got that. 19 00:01:04,236 --> 00:01:06,645 So? What do you think? 20 00:01:07,158 --> 00:01:08,321 Okay. 21 00:01:08,577 --> 00:01:10,406 I wanted to do something special for the party, 22 00:01:10,623 --> 00:01:13,116 so I thought I'd go nautical. 23 00:01:13,378 --> 00:01:14,921 Well, you nailed it, Dad. 24 00:01:15,757 --> 00:01:18,429 - This the guest list? - Yes, Dad. 25 00:01:18,680 --> 00:01:20,306 Joe Garver? 26 00:01:20,517 --> 00:01:22,891 - You invited Joe Garver? - Yes, Dad. 27 00:01:23,147 --> 00:01:25,437 After what that son of a bitch did to me at your wedding? 28 00:01:25,651 --> 00:01:28,571 Three devilled eggs left on the tray. How many does he take? How many? 29 00:01:28,949 --> 00:01:31,489 Three, that selfish bastard. 30 00:01:31,746 --> 00:01:33,158 That's right. 31 00:01:33,374 --> 00:01:36,046 Well, the day of reckoning has come. 32 00:01:36,672 --> 00:01:39,842 Payback time is here! 33 00:01:41,014 --> 00:01:42,925 Okay, Dad, listen to me. 34 00:01:43,143 --> 00:01:44,971 This is our anniversary, okay? 35 00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:47,183 We want it to be a very special day. 36 00:01:47,401 --> 00:01:49,276 So do you think you could find it in your heart 37 00:01:49,488 --> 00:01:51,649 not to punch or strangle any of our guests? 38 00:01:51,910 --> 00:01:54,664 - Of course. Anything for my baby. - Thank you. 39 00:01:54,874 --> 00:01:57,201 Unless that Garver pulls more of that devilled-egg crap, 40 00:01:57,462 --> 00:01:59,373 and then all bets are off! 41 00:02:12,616 --> 00:02:14,943 Look at that. It's a ring, it's a watch. 42 00:02:15,204 --> 00:02:16,368 Ring, watch. 43 00:02:16,582 --> 00:02:19,751 Wow, that's so neat. 44 00:02:21,508 --> 00:02:22,920 Spence, get a picture of this. 45 00:02:23,136 --> 00:02:24,335 - Coming up. - Doug, Doug, Doug. 46 00:02:24,555 --> 00:02:28,556 It's a ring and a watch. No picture can capture both at the same time. 47 00:02:30,483 --> 00:02:33,653 You thought she wanted that strand-of-pearls thing. 48 00:02:33,906 --> 00:02:36,150 Well, joke's on me, huh? 49 00:02:39,542 --> 00:02:42,332 She smells pretty. 50 00:02:42,548 --> 00:02:45,421 Spence? You know, instead of inhaling Sara, 51 00:02:45,637 --> 00:02:48,724 you might wanna try, I don't know, talking to her. 52 00:02:48,977 --> 00:02:51,351 No. No, that's not necessary. 53 00:02:51,565 --> 00:02:54,604 I mean, the relationship is fine the way it is. 54 00:02:54,863 --> 00:02:56,904 - She thinks your name is Stan. - Look, it's fine. 55 00:02:58,161 --> 00:03:00,998 I'm perfectly content just to be in the same room with her 56 00:03:01,208 --> 00:03:07,133 to gather various mental images of her for when I'm home. 57 00:03:09,307 --> 00:03:11,634 All right. Well, you enjoy that. 58 00:03:12,939 --> 00:03:15,812 - Aunt Sheila! - Oh, Dougie. 59 00:03:16,070 --> 00:03:17,731 - How was your flight? - I don't know. 60 00:03:17,990 --> 00:03:19,534 Between the Valium and the bloody marys, 61 00:03:19,744 --> 00:03:22,581 I basically woke up in the baggage claim. 62 00:03:22,833 --> 00:03:25,373 Such a mouth on you. Give me your coat, come here. 63 00:03:25,588 --> 00:03:27,796 - Uncle Hank parking the car? - Nope. 64 00:03:28,051 --> 00:03:30,342 - Where is he? - He's still in Florida. 65 00:03:30,556 --> 00:03:34,062 Hopefully underneath a big, falling anvil. 66 00:03:34,099 --> 00:03:36,271 - What? - I left him, Dougie. 67 00:03:36,484 --> 00:03:39,903 A month ago. It's the best thing I ever did. 68 00:03:40,324 --> 00:03:42,900 What? You guys have been married for so long. What happened? 69 00:03:43,163 --> 00:03:47,211 Yeah, I just got tired of living my life to save a nickel on a can of tuna fish, 70 00:03:47,421 --> 00:03:48,751 that's what happened. 71 00:03:48,966 --> 00:03:51,922 Anyway, I'm back up here now for good. 72 00:03:52,139 --> 00:03:54,846 And finally I'm gonna live a little. 73 00:03:56,188 --> 00:03:58,432 This is a joke, right? That's what this is. 74 00:03:59,027 --> 00:04:00,023 Uncle Hank? 75 00:04:00,237 --> 00:04:02,446 Oh, come on, Dougie. 76 00:04:02,659 --> 00:04:05,330 Honey, it's gonna be okay. Listen to me. 77 00:04:05,539 --> 00:04:07,284 If it's gonna make you feel any better now, 78 00:04:07,501 --> 00:04:09,745 I want you to go pour a nice glass of Scotch, 79 00:04:09,964 --> 00:04:13,336 take a little sip, and bring the rest to me. 80 00:04:15,475 --> 00:04:17,350 Okay, looking good. 81 00:04:17,562 --> 00:04:18,974 Yes. Big smiles. 82 00:04:19,232 --> 00:04:22,271 Okay, if you could just lick your lips, 83 00:04:22,488 --> 00:04:24,067 arch your backs a little. 84 00:04:24,283 --> 00:04:25,695 There you go, come on. A little. 85 00:04:25,911 --> 00:04:27,787 All right, yeah. 86 00:04:28,708 --> 00:04:31,712 Okay, Garver, it's showtime. 87 00:04:31,964 --> 00:04:35,716 He's taking one, two, 88 00:04:35,930 --> 00:04:38,803 three, four... 89 00:04:39,061 --> 00:04:40,806 Four? 90 00:04:41,315 --> 00:04:44,688 What kind of an animal eats four devilled eggs? 91 00:04:46,325 --> 00:04:48,652 Oh, excuse me. Excuse me. 92 00:04:48,872 --> 00:04:51,329 - You're welcome to one of mine. - What? 93 00:04:51,543 --> 00:04:53,585 Well, please. I couldn't possibly eat both of these. 94 00:04:53,798 --> 00:04:55,079 Come on, take them. 95 00:04:55,342 --> 00:04:56,624 - Oh, thank you. - Yes. 96 00:04:56,845 --> 00:04:58,044 Please excuse my outburst. 97 00:04:58,264 --> 00:05:01,434 When it comes to buffet items, I can be a bit of a brute. 98 00:05:03,650 --> 00:05:05,478 Arthur Eugene Spooner. 99 00:05:05,737 --> 00:05:07,897 Oh, you're Carrie's father. 100 00:05:08,158 --> 00:05:09,274 How do you do? 101 00:05:09,494 --> 00:05:11,904 I'm Doug's aunt, Sheila Ratnaster. 102 00:05:12,166 --> 00:05:15,752 - What a beautiful name! - Why, thank you. 103 00:05:19,096 --> 00:05:21,221 Uncle Hank, I don't understand how you can walk away 104 00:05:21,434 --> 00:05:22,846 from a wonderful marriage. 105 00:05:23,062 --> 00:05:26,600 Okay, yeah, she overpays for tuna, that must be very painful. 106 00:05:26,819 --> 00:05:28,860 Now, look, I want you to work this out. 107 00:05:29,073 --> 00:05:32,077 Hey, there's more to life than happiness, all right? Get over it. 108 00:05:33,874 --> 00:05:35,952 Why won't he listen to me? 109 00:05:36,170 --> 00:05:37,963 I don't know, honey, but I think you lost him 110 00:05:38,174 --> 00:05:40,465 when you started quoting Scripture. 111 00:05:41,263 --> 00:05:43,304 Yeah. I know, I know. I just- 112 00:05:43,517 --> 00:05:45,559 They're like second parents to me. 113 00:05:45,772 --> 00:05:47,433 I was always over their house after school, 114 00:05:47,650 --> 00:05:49,276 playing Nok Hockey with Uncle Hank. 115 00:05:49,863 --> 00:05:52,272 And then Aunt Sheila would make me a big dinner. 116 00:05:52,493 --> 00:05:53,573 Then I'd go home. 117 00:05:53,787 --> 00:05:54,902 For dinner. 118 00:05:56,584 --> 00:05:58,163 Oh, man. 119 00:05:58,421 --> 00:06:02,173 Look! Look, honey. Ring, watch. 120 00:06:02,387 --> 00:06:05,593 Ring, watch. Ring, watch. 121 00:06:05,810 --> 00:06:08,564 - You're so lucky. You're lucky. - Yeah. 122 00:06:08,815 --> 00:06:11,225 Honey, it still is our anniversary. 123 00:06:11,445 --> 00:06:15,529 And I still have a little frosting left. 124 00:06:16,580 --> 00:06:17,612 I like frosting. 125 00:06:21,590 --> 00:06:22,753 Am I interrupting? 126 00:06:23,009 --> 00:06:25,300 No, Dad. No. 127 00:06:26,015 --> 00:06:27,510 Douglas? 128 00:06:28,019 --> 00:06:30,144 I'd like to talk to you about your Aunt Sheila. 129 00:06:30,356 --> 00:06:31,638 Look, Arthur, she's a nice lady. 130 00:06:31,859 --> 00:06:35,231 If she ate the last chicken wing or potato puff, I'm sorry. 131 00:06:35,950 --> 00:06:38,075 No, no. I found her quite enchanting. 132 00:06:38,288 --> 00:06:41,208 In fact, with your permission, 133 00:06:41,419 --> 00:06:43,414 I'd like to woo her. 134 00:06:46,596 --> 00:06:48,341 "Woo her"? 135 00:06:48,850 --> 00:06:52,190 I come to you since you are her closest living relative, 136 00:06:52,226 --> 00:06:54,765 other than her husband, that is. 137 00:06:56,197 --> 00:07:00,863 Well, Arthur, thanks for coming to me, but I gotta give you a no on this one. 138 00:07:01,082 --> 00:07:02,875 But, you know, if you're looking to be set up, 139 00:07:03,085 --> 00:07:05,793 I'll certainly keep my eyes open for you. 140 00:07:10,141 --> 00:07:12,135 Dad, just give me a second with him, okay? 141 00:07:16,736 --> 00:07:20,572 Cold pigs in blankets. Life is good again. 142 00:07:20,786 --> 00:07:21,782 - Doug? - Yeah? 143 00:07:21,996 --> 00:07:24,324 I know you're upset about your aunt and uncle, 144 00:07:24,585 --> 00:07:27,791 but would it be so terrible if my father went out with her? 145 00:07:28,050 --> 00:07:30,009 No, no, no. Not gonna date Aunt Sheila. Sorry, no. 146 00:07:30,262 --> 00:07:31,259 Well, why not, honey? 147 00:07:31,473 --> 00:07:34,013 The man spends every night in our basement alone, 148 00:07:34,228 --> 00:07:36,602 yelling at TV commercials. 149 00:07:36,816 --> 00:07:39,107 He just wants a little company, that's all. 150 00:07:39,363 --> 00:07:40,942 I don't want that company to be my aunt. 151 00:07:41,158 --> 00:07:42,653 Let him go out with your aunt. 152 00:07:42,911 --> 00:07:44,704 Okay, that would be his sister. 153 00:07:45,583 --> 00:07:47,244 There's a great icebreaker. 154 00:07:48,213 --> 00:07:50,207 Carrie, I'm not trying to be a jerk about this. 155 00:07:50,467 --> 00:07:52,842 It's just that Hank and Sheila, they're still married. 156 00:07:53,097 --> 00:07:56,101 - They're probably gonna get divorced. - They are not getting a divorce. 157 00:07:56,312 --> 00:08:00,360 They're separated temporarily because they hate each other. 158 00:08:00,612 --> 00:08:01,893 Well, look at it this way: 159 00:08:02,114 --> 00:08:05,202 What better way to force a woman back to her husband 160 00:08:05,412 --> 00:08:07,906 than an evening out with my father? 161 00:08:08,502 --> 00:08:10,045 I don't know. 162 00:08:10,297 --> 00:08:13,585 Honey, come on, just let him go out with her. 163 00:08:13,803 --> 00:08:16,344 Look. Ring, watch. 164 00:08:16,559 --> 00:08:20,061 All right, you know what? That well has run real dry, all right? 165 00:08:20,733 --> 00:08:22,478 He can go out with her, okay? 166 00:08:22,695 --> 00:08:24,904 - Thank you, honey. - All right. 167 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:26,660 Daddy? 168 00:08:26,995 --> 00:08:28,539 Yes? 169 00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:36,220 Come in. 170 00:08:36,430 --> 00:08:39,219 Oh, hi, you're very busy. I'm just gonna give you these and vamoose. 171 00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:41,638 - Are these the anniversary pictures? - Yeah, goodbye. 172 00:08:41,857 --> 00:08:44,231 Wait, hang on, honey. Let me take a look at them. 173 00:08:44,445 --> 00:08:46,736 I might want some copies or something. 174 00:08:46,950 --> 00:08:50,037 They're all framed really weird. I think the lab screwed up. 175 00:08:50,248 --> 00:08:53,869 It serves me right for using Kodak. 176 00:08:54,381 --> 00:08:56,838 Sara by the door. 177 00:08:57,303 --> 00:08:59,677 Sara by the couch. 178 00:09:00,100 --> 00:09:02,260 Sara on the couch. 179 00:09:02,479 --> 00:09:04,723 Sara bending over the couch. 180 00:09:05,736 --> 00:09:07,647 How did you get this one of her sleeping? 181 00:09:07,906 --> 00:09:09,236 Look, I'm really, really sorry. 182 00:09:09,451 --> 00:09:11,492 And I promise I'll make it up to you guys, I swear. 183 00:09:11,705 --> 00:09:13,249 All right. Don't worry about it, Spence. 184 00:09:13,459 --> 00:09:15,999 Just get some help, okay? 185 00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:18,834 Hey. Where you going? 186 00:09:19,053 --> 00:09:20,928 I'm so very ashamed. 187 00:09:21,140 --> 00:09:23,348 All right, call you later. 188 00:09:23,812 --> 00:09:24,808 What you got there? 189 00:09:25,064 --> 00:09:27,272 The pictures from our anniversary party. 190 00:09:27,527 --> 00:09:30,103 All right. Hey, hon, you look good here, bending over the couch. 191 00:09:30,324 --> 00:09:32,283 You look like you lost some weight. 192 00:09:32,495 --> 00:09:34,323 That's Sara. 193 00:09:36,628 --> 00:09:38,788 I love you. 194 00:09:40,844 --> 00:09:43,551 Well, I'm off to my date with Sheila. 195 00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:47,639 Daddy, you look so handsome. Doesn't he, Doug? 196 00:09:47,899 --> 00:09:50,772 Yeah, he's a sweet piece of man candy. 197 00:09:51,990 --> 00:09:53,367 So where you gonna take her? 198 00:09:53,618 --> 00:09:56,290 I guess that diner over on Continental Avenue. 199 00:09:56,499 --> 00:09:58,244 I'm a little short on the moola this month. 200 00:10:03,095 --> 00:10:05,553 All right, Arthur. Here you go, all right? 201 00:10:06,017 --> 00:10:08,142 - No, no. I'll be fine. - No, no, come on, here. 202 00:10:08,397 --> 00:10:13,229 Take her someplace nice, all right? You have lobster, it's very nautical. 203 00:10:13,448 --> 00:10:14,943 Thanks, Douglas. 204 00:10:15,159 --> 00:10:16,703 Wish me luck. 205 00:10:16,913 --> 00:10:19,489 I'm a little nervous. I haven't had a date in quite a few years. 206 00:10:19,752 --> 00:10:22,292 Oh, Dad, just be yourself, it'll be fine. 207 00:10:22,507 --> 00:10:25,879 Just don't do that thing with your toes, and don't show her your hernia scar. 208 00:10:26,556 --> 00:10:30,225 Well, you're tying my hands here, but okay. 209 00:10:34,530 --> 00:10:37,023 Dad, I'm making pancakes, you want any? 210 00:10:39,247 --> 00:10:40,992 Dad? 211 00:10:43,923 --> 00:10:45,668 Dad? 212 00:10:52,814 --> 00:10:55,390 - There you are. - Yes, there I am. 213 00:10:56,613 --> 00:10:58,691 So how'd your Dad's date go, huh? 214 00:10:58,909 --> 00:11:00,702 Very well. 215 00:11:00,955 --> 00:11:04,742 Or not so well, depending on whether you're him or you. 216 00:11:07,008 --> 00:11:08,718 You know what, honey? You're late for work. 217 00:11:08,928 --> 00:11:11,766 The watch ring doesn't lie. Let's go. 218 00:11:11,976 --> 00:11:13,935 You know my shift doesn't start till 9. 219 00:11:14,189 --> 00:11:15,388 Not till 9? Is that right? 220 00:11:15,608 --> 00:11:18,398 Maybe you wanna go a little early and, you know, kiss up? 221 00:11:18,822 --> 00:11:19,854 What's going on? 222 00:11:20,075 --> 00:11:21,404 Hi, Doug. 223 00:11:22,246 --> 00:11:23,658 Hello, sweetheart. 224 00:11:24,625 --> 00:11:26,703 Yes, this is a little awkward, isn't it? 225 00:11:26,921 --> 00:11:29,925 But what the hell, I need my coffee. 226 00:11:30,595 --> 00:11:33,598 Aunt Sheila? It's Aunt Sheila. 227 00:11:33,809 --> 00:11:36,599 Well, it looks like her, hon. 228 00:11:36,857 --> 00:11:39,231 - Morning, kids. Morning, my sweet. - Hello, my dear. 229 00:11:39,445 --> 00:11:40,905 Look, you gotta get going. 230 00:11:41,115 --> 00:11:43,988 I got another one of Doug's aunts coming in right behind you. 231 00:11:44,747 --> 00:11:46,540 Oh, stop it. You're so terrible. 232 00:11:46,751 --> 00:11:49,422 But so, so cute. 233 00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:55,657 Well, thanks again for giving me that extra money. 234 00:11:55,694 --> 00:11:58,595 I think the lobster put me right over the top. 235 00:12:04,701 --> 00:12:06,779 Are you happy? Are you happy now? 236 00:12:06,997 --> 00:12:09,705 Yes, Doug, I have finally achieved my dream 237 00:12:09,961 --> 00:12:12,371 of coupling my father with your aunt. I'm ecstatic. 238 00:12:12,633 --> 00:12:15,387 "Doug, may I have your permission to woo her?" 239 00:12:15,597 --> 00:12:17,888 "Woo her. " Well, it rhymes with "woo"! 240 00:12:19,479 --> 00:12:21,973 - All right, Doug, just calm down now. - Look, I can't, okay? 241 00:12:22,193 --> 00:12:23,190 That's my Aunt Sheila. 242 00:12:23,404 --> 00:12:25,731 She used to bathe me and tuck me in and tell me stories. 243 00:12:25,950 --> 00:12:28,907 It's not someone I want to picture straddling Papa. 244 00:12:29,165 --> 00:12:30,874 All right, she wasn't straddling him. 245 00:12:31,085 --> 00:12:32,415 They were just kind of spooning. 246 00:12:33,172 --> 00:12:34,965 Oh, God. 247 00:12:35,343 --> 00:12:36,507 Stop. 248 00:12:36,762 --> 00:12:38,923 I hope they remembered to use birth control. 249 00:12:39,810 --> 00:12:41,603 - What? - I was just thinking. 250 00:12:41,814 --> 00:12:43,143 Your aunt's not that old. 251 00:12:43,358 --> 00:12:45,269 Has she gone through menopause, do you know? 252 00:12:45,529 --> 00:12:47,524 I don't know! 253 00:12:47,867 --> 00:12:49,660 Oh, my God, I didn't even think of that. 254 00:12:49,871 --> 00:12:51,912 They could have a child. 255 00:12:52,626 --> 00:12:56,330 He would be my cousin and my brother-in-law. 256 00:12:57,510 --> 00:13:00,716 Oh, God, I hear banjo music. Oh, God. 257 00:13:01,852 --> 00:13:08,821 Doug, I agree that this thing has a variety of nauseating aspects to it. 258 00:13:09,032 --> 00:13:11,193 But they're two grown adults, 259 00:13:11,412 --> 00:13:14,249 with obviously still very strong sexual urges- 260 00:13:16,672 --> 00:13:19,675 And there's nothing we can do about it! 261 00:13:32,702 --> 00:13:35,659 All right, this isn't so bad, as long as he keeps his hands where they- 262 00:13:35,875 --> 00:13:38,629 Oh, God. Oh, God. 263 00:13:51,905 --> 00:13:55,989 - Doug, what is the matter? - Nothing. 264 00:13:56,247 --> 00:13:59,869 Then why do you keep muttering my father's name and cursing? 265 00:14:00,463 --> 00:14:02,541 You know what? It's that music. 266 00:14:02,759 --> 00:14:04,588 I just know they're doing something down there. 267 00:14:04,805 --> 00:14:06,467 And I can't do something with you 268 00:14:06,725 --> 00:14:09,397 when he's in the same house doing something with her. 269 00:14:09,773 --> 00:14:12,017 Come on. Yes, you can. 270 00:14:12,278 --> 00:14:15,115 No, I can't. Trust me. 271 00:14:16,243 --> 00:14:18,951 Honey, they are probably just dancing. 272 00:14:19,166 --> 00:14:21,706 You know my father, he loves to dance. 273 00:14:21,963 --> 00:14:25,417 Now, come on, do that thing you do. 274 00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:39,786 Why isn't he fixing the record? 275 00:14:39,997 --> 00:14:45,341 Honey, they will. It just takes time to walk over and do it. 276 00:14:51,477 --> 00:14:53,935 - Nighty-night. - Night. 277 00:15:01,329 --> 00:15:02,955 Hello. 278 00:15:03,208 --> 00:15:04,240 Hey, Spence. 279 00:15:04,502 --> 00:15:05,748 Why are you so tired? 280 00:15:06,005 --> 00:15:08,165 My father-in-law and my aunt were having sex all night. 281 00:15:08,426 --> 00:15:11,133 Gotcha. Look, I went through the anniversary photos, 282 00:15:11,348 --> 00:15:13,010 and I managed to cut and paste some of them 283 00:15:13,227 --> 00:15:15,186 and get you and Carrie together in a few shots. 284 00:15:15,398 --> 00:15:18,105 Trouble is, you're slightly different sizes. 285 00:15:18,988 --> 00:15:21,660 This is nice, it looks like I'm standing in the palm of her hand. 286 00:15:21,868 --> 00:15:22,865 Isn't it? 287 00:15:23,079 --> 00:15:25,751 I'll make you 8-by-1 Os. My treat. 288 00:15:29,383 --> 00:15:32,422 - Oh, hi! - Hello. 289 00:15:32,806 --> 00:15:33,922 What was your name again? 290 00:15:34,184 --> 00:15:35,845 - Stan. - Stan, right, Stan. 291 00:15:36,062 --> 00:15:38,472 Listen, I'm so glad I ran into you. 292 00:15:38,692 --> 00:15:41,364 See, I was looking through the pictures from the anniversary party, 293 00:15:41,573 --> 00:15:44,113 and, you know, something about them was so great. 294 00:15:45,413 --> 00:15:46,577 Thank you. 295 00:15:46,833 --> 00:15:49,504 The thing is, my agent says I need some new shots for my portfolio. 296 00:15:49,713 --> 00:15:52,420 And I was thinking, could you maybe take them? 297 00:15:52,635 --> 00:15:55,129 I mean, I can't pay you a lot, but, you know, just as a favour? 298 00:15:55,391 --> 00:15:57,052 Well, I can only do it evenings. 299 00:15:58,229 --> 00:16:01,601 - If daytime's better, I can quit my job. - Yeah. Yeah, okay. 300 00:16:04,491 --> 00:16:06,402 Morning, Doug. 301 00:16:06,746 --> 00:16:08,491 Yeah, morning. 302 00:16:08,833 --> 00:16:09,948 You look tired. 303 00:16:10,544 --> 00:16:11,874 I didn't get much sleep. 304 00:16:12,131 --> 00:16:13,710 I didn't either, if you get my drift. 305 00:16:13,926 --> 00:16:15,552 Do you? Do you? Do you? 306 00:16:15,763 --> 00:16:17,722 I get it, all right? Leave me alone. 307 00:16:17,975 --> 00:16:21,062 Actually, Doug, I didn't just come up here for playful banter. 308 00:16:21,315 --> 00:16:22,645 Then go back. 309 00:16:24,112 --> 00:16:27,575 Well, before I do, I want to talk to you about Aunt Sheila. 310 00:16:27,611 --> 00:16:31,038 Once again, I stand before you, seeking your permission. 311 00:16:31,292 --> 00:16:32,574 For what? What do you wanna do now? 312 00:16:32,795 --> 00:16:35,467 Do you wanna stick her in go-go boots and make her dance in a cage? 313 00:16:35,717 --> 00:16:40,300 No. I plan to ask her to become the fourth, and hopefully final, 314 00:16:40,518 --> 00:16:42,062 Mrs. Arthur Spooner. 315 00:16:42,313 --> 00:16:45,103 You wanna marry her? What are you, insane? 316 00:16:45,361 --> 00:16:46,476 I know what you're thinking. 317 00:16:46,697 --> 00:16:49,486 Why buy the cow when you're getting the milk free? 318 00:16:49,702 --> 00:16:52,659 Well, the fact is, I love that cow. 319 00:16:53,084 --> 00:16:55,375 Yeah, well, you know what? You can't have that cow, okay? 320 00:16:55,589 --> 00:16:58,970 Tell you what, no more milk, either. That's it, all right? Permission denied. 321 00:16:59,006 --> 00:17:01,546 Well, I don't need your permission, Douglas! 322 00:17:01,767 --> 00:17:04,605 Asking for it was just my charming way of breaking the news to you. 323 00:17:07,444 --> 00:17:09,154 Carrie! 324 00:17:09,365 --> 00:17:11,692 - What? - Could you come down here, please? 325 00:17:11,953 --> 00:17:13,199 I'm in the shower. 326 00:17:13,414 --> 00:17:15,492 Yeah, well, your father wants to marry my aunt! 327 00:17:15,752 --> 00:17:17,960 - Tell him no. - I did! 328 00:17:18,173 --> 00:17:21,177 - What'd he say? - He said he's doing it anyway! 329 00:17:21,388 --> 00:17:22,967 I'll be right down. 330 00:17:23,183 --> 00:17:24,559 Oh, now you're screwed. 331 00:17:26,272 --> 00:17:27,388 Oh, yeah? 332 00:17:27,608 --> 00:17:29,649 Well, you can forget about being my best man. 333 00:17:29,904 --> 00:17:34,071 Listen closely to me, Arthur, you may not ask my aunt to marry you. 334 00:17:34,329 --> 00:17:36,038 So I'm good enough to be your father-in-law, 335 00:17:36,249 --> 00:17:38,244 but not your uncle, is that it? Well, too bad. 336 00:17:38,462 --> 00:17:42,760 I'm gonna marry her and you can't stop me, nephew! 337 00:17:58,917 --> 00:18:01,458 Oh, hi, Dougie, I was expecting someone else. 338 00:18:01,673 --> 00:18:02,836 - Do you want to come in? - No. 339 00:18:03,092 --> 00:18:04,754 I can't. I'm running late for work. 340 00:18:04,971 --> 00:18:06,965 But I really need to talk to you about Arthur. 341 00:18:07,225 --> 00:18:10,763 Arthur, yes. He's such a free spirit, isn't he? 342 00:18:10,982 --> 00:18:14,152 Yeah, he's a barrel of monkeys. Look, I know this is none of my business, 343 00:18:14,364 --> 00:18:17,320 but I really think you need to put the brakes on this relationship thing 344 00:18:17,536 --> 00:18:19,080 before things go too far. 345 00:18:19,331 --> 00:18:22,501 How much farther can they go? We've pleasured each other in every way- 346 00:18:22,713 --> 00:18:23,959 Okay! Okay! Okay! Thank you. 347 00:18:24,216 --> 00:18:25,877 Thank you. 348 00:18:26,219 --> 00:18:30,351 Look, you don't understand. Arthur, he's gonna ask you to marry him. 349 00:18:31,688 --> 00:18:33,813 Now, I know you may be tempted to do this, 350 00:18:34,026 --> 00:18:35,985 but I'm telling you, if you rush into this, 351 00:18:36,197 --> 00:18:40,068 you, Arthur and I are gonna regret it for the rest of our lives. 352 00:18:41,206 --> 00:18:42,750 I don't want to marry Arthur. 353 00:18:43,962 --> 00:18:45,505 - You don't? - No. 354 00:18:48,971 --> 00:18:50,087 Hi, Joe. 355 00:18:50,307 --> 00:18:52,218 I'll be right in. 356 00:18:54,148 --> 00:18:56,142 You're dating Garver? 357 00:18:56,402 --> 00:18:58,776 I met him at your party. I had a very good night. 358 00:18:58,990 --> 00:19:01,662 Let's face it, I looked hot. 359 00:19:01,871 --> 00:19:04,411 I can't believe this! This whole time I'm worried about my poor, 360 00:19:04,626 --> 00:19:06,169 vulnerable Aunt Sheila getting hurt. 361 00:19:06,630 --> 00:19:08,291 Meanwhile, you're having a great time 362 00:19:08,508 --> 00:19:11,678 working your way through the old men of Queens. 363 00:19:11,931 --> 00:19:15,469 Doug, I have been married to one man for over 30 years. 364 00:19:15,689 --> 00:19:18,229 I'm entitled to sow a few oats, for God's sake. 365 00:19:18,486 --> 00:19:19,862 Hey, Arthur is not oats, okay? 366 00:19:20,072 --> 00:19:22,530 He's a guy who loves you, and he thinks you love him. 367 00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:24,405 I mean, you're treating him like crap! 368 00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:26,908 - Douglas! - Sorry. 369 00:19:29,674 --> 00:19:32,594 Now, look, tomorrow I'm gonna talk to Arthur, okay? 370 00:19:32,805 --> 00:19:35,974 But right now, I have company. 371 00:19:36,395 --> 00:19:38,104 Excuse me. 372 00:19:40,110 --> 00:19:41,736 And tuck in that shirt. 373 00:19:51,006 --> 00:19:52,632 What are you doing here, Heffernan? 374 00:19:52,843 --> 00:19:54,422 You came here to poison her against me? 375 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:56,259 No, no, no. I mean, well, yes, but- 376 00:19:56,475 --> 00:19:58,220 Look, you can't go in there. 377 00:19:58,478 --> 00:20:01,818 Step aside. I don't want to have to remove you. 378 00:20:01,855 --> 00:20:03,978 Nor do I think I could. 379 00:20:04,657 --> 00:20:06,485 Look, Arthur, I really think we need to talk. 380 00:20:06,744 --> 00:20:09,534 Hey, what your aunt and I have is something beautiful, 381 00:20:09,750 --> 00:20:11,910 something you'll never understand. 382 00:20:12,129 --> 00:20:13,958 Now, good day, sir. 383 00:20:14,217 --> 00:20:16,888 - Arthur- - Good day, sir! 384 00:20:43,648 --> 00:20:45,559 What are you looking at? 385 00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:14,071 - Your Dad asleep? - Yeah. 386 00:21:14,289 --> 00:21:16,082 I read to him from one of his Time-Life books 387 00:21:16,293 --> 00:21:18,371 on how to build a deck. Put him right out. 388 00:21:21,094 --> 00:21:23,254 He's a tough guy. He'll bounce back from this. 389 00:21:27,857 --> 00:21:31,609 Hey. Where's Spence? What happened to the photo shoot? 390 00:21:31,823 --> 00:21:32,903 We're done. 391 00:21:33,117 --> 00:21:35,907 What do you mean, you're done? You just started five minutes ago. 392 00:21:36,164 --> 00:21:37,161 It was so weird. 393 00:21:37,375 --> 00:21:39,833 He put the film in the camera, and as soon as I started posing, 394 00:21:40,047 --> 00:21:43,335 he shot his entire roll in like ten seconds. 395 00:21:46,643 --> 00:21:50,810 And then he runs off, saying, "Nothing like this has ever happened before. " 396 00:21:53,990 --> 00:21:55,984 They always say that. 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net