1
00:00:36,487 --> 00:00:38,121
Check it out.
2
00:00:38,189 --> 00:00:41,157
"Whips and chains."
3
00:00:41,225 --> 00:00:43,626
What's the matter? My back rubs
not doing it for you anymore?
4
00:00:45,262 --> 00:00:46,496
Page 24.
5
00:00:48,832 --> 00:00:50,166
Oh, my God.
6
00:00:52,236 --> 00:00:54,504
What is he doing to him?
7
00:00:54,571 --> 00:00:57,707
Oh, I'm sorry, 42.
8
00:00:57,774 --> 00:00:59,476
Yeah, but what is
he doing to him?
9
00:00:59,543 --> 00:01:00,643
Come on, 42. Page 42.
10
00:01:00,711 --> 00:01:02,778
Ok, all right. Come on.
11
00:01:02,846 --> 00:01:05,148
There it is. Look right there.
12
00:01:05,216 --> 00:01:09,752
"Ebony God seeks dominant professional
type for late-night spank sessions."
13
00:01:11,288 --> 00:01:12,788
"Full dungeon."
14
00:01:14,791 --> 00:01:16,959
Where are we at here, Doug?
15
00:01:17,028 --> 00:01:19,095
The phone number. Look,
it's Deacon's phone number.
16
00:01:19,163 --> 00:01:21,064
I put the ad in there
to get back at him.
17
00:01:21,132 --> 00:01:23,866
Are you two still having that
stupid practical joke war?
18
00:01:23,934 --> 00:01:25,701
You bet your sweet
bananas we are.
19
00:01:25,769 --> 00:01:28,338
How great is this? He's probably
getting calls from S&M freaks,
20
00:01:28,406 --> 00:01:30,206
oh, right about now.
21
00:01:32,176 --> 00:01:34,577
Doug, the man has children.
22
00:01:34,645 --> 00:01:36,513
And he should've thought of that
23
00:01:36,580 --> 00:01:40,250
before he put a sign on my back
that said "I love butter."
24
00:01:40,317 --> 00:01:44,320
Actually, it said "I heart
butter," but that's what it meant.
25
00:01:44,388 --> 00:01:46,322
But you do heart butter.
26
00:01:46,390 --> 00:01:48,991
That's my business, not
the whole world's, ok?
27
00:01:49,060 --> 00:01:50,126
Morning, all.
28
00:01:50,194 --> 00:01:51,827
Morning. Hey.
29
00:01:51,895 --> 00:01:53,496
"Whips and chains."
30
00:01:54,298 --> 00:01:56,066
Good for you, kids.
31
00:01:58,769 --> 00:02:01,071
Just be safe.
32
00:02:01,138 --> 00:02:03,573
Good-bye. Bye.
33
00:02:03,640 --> 00:02:06,742
Darling, I have a legal matter
I need your assistance with.
34
00:02:06,810 --> 00:02:07,944
What are you talking about?
35
00:02:08,011 --> 00:02:09,979
I was down on the
boardwalk last night,
36
00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:12,848
and I paid a fellow $12
to draw my portrait.
37
00:02:12,916 --> 00:02:14,617
Look at this. Look.
38
00:02:17,388 --> 00:02:18,654
That's funny.
39
00:02:18,722 --> 00:02:20,490
It's not funny.
It's humiliating.
40
00:02:20,558 --> 00:02:22,358
People were gathered
around laughing,
41
00:02:22,426 --> 00:02:24,561
having a great time
at my expense.
42
00:02:24,628 --> 00:02:27,330
All right, so what do you want to do?
You want to sue the artist?
43
00:02:27,398 --> 00:02:31,401
Well, I estimate I endured $1 million
worth of pain and suffering.
44
00:02:31,469 --> 00:02:35,838
Between you and me, I'd settle
out of court for $8,000.
45
00:02:35,906 --> 00:02:37,840
Well, good luck with that.
46
00:02:37,908 --> 00:02:39,175
So, you're not gonna help me?
47
00:02:39,243 --> 00:02:41,077
Dad, how am I
supposed to help you?
48
00:02:41,145 --> 00:02:43,813
I'm not a lawyer, and I think
the picture's hilarious.
49
00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:45,515
Oh, so that how
it's going to be.
50
00:02:45,583 --> 00:02:47,283
Well, thank you very little!
51
00:02:47,351 --> 00:02:50,253
Uh, excuse me, but what
do you think I do there?
52
00:02:50,321 --> 00:02:53,055
I'm a secretary. The
lawyers handle the law.
53
00:02:53,124 --> 00:02:56,459
I type and make sure
they're not thirsty.
54
00:02:56,527 --> 00:03:01,831
Would it kill you to show them this
picture as you hand them a snapple?
55
00:03:01,898 --> 00:03:03,866
Would you stop it? I
mean, for God's sakes,
56
00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:06,702
you've never expressed any
interest in my job until now,
57
00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:08,704
when you need something.
That's not true!
58
00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:11,374
Oh, really? Have you ever
once come down to visit me?
59
00:03:11,442 --> 00:03:13,476
Do you have any idea what
I actually do there?
60
00:03:13,544 --> 00:03:15,778
How I actually spend my day?
No, you don't.
61
00:03:15,846 --> 00:03:17,980
Well, you have no idea
how I spend my day.
62
00:03:18,048 --> 00:03:19,415
You sit around in
your underwear,
63
00:03:19,483 --> 00:03:21,717
and you make crank phone calls.
64
00:03:22,586 --> 00:03:24,354
Those were inquiries!
65
00:03:29,926 --> 00:03:31,194
Hey, Carrie? Um?
66
00:03:31,262 --> 00:03:33,663
Can you tell if
this milk is good?
67
00:03:33,730 --> 00:03:35,765
What's the date on it?
Yesterday.
68
00:03:35,832 --> 00:03:36,932
I don't know, who's it for?
69
00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,734
Del pozo. It's fine.
70
00:03:41,338 --> 00:03:42,972
Here she is, Mr. Spooner.
71
00:03:43,040 --> 00:03:44,707
Thank you, young man.
72
00:03:48,879 --> 00:03:50,813
Dad, what are you doing here?
73
00:03:50,881 --> 00:03:53,483
Does this have anything to do
with that stupid caricature?
74
00:03:53,551 --> 00:03:56,186
No, no. I was just reflecting
on your comments earlier,
75
00:03:56,253 --> 00:03:57,787
and I realized you were right.
76
00:03:57,854 --> 00:03:59,989
I should take a more active
interest in your life.
77
00:04:00,057 --> 00:04:01,524
So, here I am.
78
00:04:02,125 --> 00:04:03,193
Really?
79
00:04:03,260 --> 00:04:04,760
Absolutely.
80
00:04:04,828 --> 00:04:08,464
Dad, that's... That's so sweet.
Thank you.
81
00:04:08,532 --> 00:04:11,668
Well, instead of thanking me, how
about giving me a grand tour?
82
00:04:11,735 --> 00:04:14,937
Ok, well, I don't know how
grand it is, but here goes.
83
00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:17,340
Wow me. Ok, um...
84
00:04:17,408 --> 00:04:19,909
All right, well, this,
this whole area here
85
00:04:19,976 --> 00:04:22,512
is where we keep files
relating to our pending cases.
86
00:04:22,580 --> 00:04:25,081
Uh-huh, and you file them
alphabetically or...
87
00:04:25,148 --> 00:04:26,382
Alphabetically, yes.
88
00:04:26,450 --> 00:04:29,252
That's a marvelous
sorting system.
89
00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:31,421
And, uh, this is
the coffee area.
90
00:04:31,488 --> 00:04:34,224
This is where I get my boss,
you guessed it, coffee.
91
00:04:34,291 --> 00:04:36,359
Tell me, do you
use a percolator?
92
00:04:36,427 --> 00:04:37,760
Drip. Drip.
93
00:04:38,495 --> 00:04:40,563
Fancy.
94
00:04:40,631 --> 00:04:42,498
And then we're back at my desk,
95
00:04:42,566 --> 00:04:43,899
and that's basically the tour.
96
00:04:43,967 --> 00:04:47,036
Well, thank you for that
behind-the-scenes peek.
97
00:04:47,104 --> 00:04:48,771
Oh, that's my phone.
98
00:04:48,839 --> 00:04:49,939
I have to get that. Good.
99
00:04:50,006 --> 00:04:52,442
Now I get to see you in action.
100
00:04:52,509 --> 00:04:54,577
Mr. Grossman's office.
101
00:04:54,645 --> 00:04:57,280
Oh, he's at lunch. May
I take a message?
102
00:04:57,914 --> 00:04:59,349
You're good.
103
00:05:06,857 --> 00:05:08,691
Take the ad out now.
104
00:05:10,294 --> 00:05:12,295
Ad? I don't have any
time to place any ads.
105
00:05:12,363 --> 00:05:14,597
I'm too busy hearting butter.
106
00:05:14,665 --> 00:05:16,065
Just cancel it, ok?
107
00:05:16,133 --> 00:05:19,402
There they are, butch Cassidy
and the dumb-ass kid.
108
00:05:20,904 --> 00:05:21,937
Hey, spero.
109
00:05:22,005 --> 00:05:23,306
How's it going, man?
110
00:05:23,374 --> 00:05:25,541
Oh, terrible. My deliveries
are spread all over town.
111
00:05:25,609 --> 00:05:28,110
Kind of like your
mother, Heffernan.
112
00:05:28,178 --> 00:05:29,812
You know, guy, enough.
113
00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:32,749
Listen, Rico just pulled
out of the calendar.
114
00:05:32,816 --> 00:05:34,517
Now we're gonna need a new Mr.
April.
115
00:05:34,585 --> 00:05:35,951
What calendar?
116
00:05:36,019 --> 00:05:37,754
The men of I.P.S. Calendar.
117
00:05:37,821 --> 00:05:41,758
You know, to raise money for some
juvenile something or other, you know.
118
00:05:41,825 --> 00:05:43,159
What do you say, guys, huh?
119
00:05:43,226 --> 00:05:45,227
I'm assuming you want to sell
a couple of these things,
120
00:05:45,296 --> 00:05:47,129
so that let's him out.
Sure. I'll do it.
121
00:05:47,197 --> 00:05:49,131
Whoa, what the hell's
that supposed to mean?
122
00:05:49,199 --> 00:05:51,801
It's supposed to mean that ebony
God is probably a better choice
123
00:05:51,868 --> 00:05:53,770
than pasty doughboy.
124
00:05:53,837 --> 00:05:55,971
So that's how it's gonna be, huh?
You know what?
125
00:05:56,039 --> 00:05:58,040
I'll do the calendar.
Well, I wanna do it.
126
00:05:58,108 --> 00:05:59,409
Whoa, if you're both interested,
127
00:05:59,476 --> 00:06:01,511
I'm going to have to let
the guys upstairs decide.
128
00:06:01,578 --> 00:06:04,414
They're gonna need snapshots, and
you gotta fill out this bio stuff.
129
00:06:04,481 --> 00:06:05,782
Oh, yeah? Yeah.
130
00:06:05,849 --> 00:06:07,483
All right, whoever
gets it should know
131
00:06:07,551 --> 00:06:11,921
the shoots gonna be here Friday
night after work. I'm doing it.
132
00:06:11,988 --> 00:06:14,624
Well, let the games begin, Mr.
Palmer.
133
00:06:14,692 --> 00:06:16,025
That's Mr. April to you.
134
00:06:16,092 --> 00:06:17,860
No, no, no, no, no.
I'm Mr. April.
135
00:06:17,928 --> 00:06:21,597
You're Mr. march-your-cocoa-buns-
out-of-here, yeah.
136
00:06:23,033 --> 00:06:25,134
Yeah. What's up? What's up?
137
00:06:39,341 --> 00:06:41,643
I hate it when they get stuck.
138
00:06:41,710 --> 00:06:44,378
Well, thanks for lunch, dad.
That was really nice.
139
00:06:44,446 --> 00:06:47,015
Yeah, those Chinese make a
delightful bowl of rice.
140
00:06:47,082 --> 00:06:49,817
Actually, it was benihana.
It's Japanese.
141
00:06:50,385 --> 00:06:51,585
6 of 1.
142
00:06:52,387 --> 00:06:54,155
Well, I'm off.
143
00:06:54,222 --> 00:06:56,891
Got a boatload of things
to put in my diary.
144
00:06:56,959 --> 00:07:00,261
All right. Well, thanks for coming, dad.
That was great.
145
00:07:00,328 --> 00:07:02,797
Pleasure was all mine. Enjoy
the rest of your day.
146
00:07:02,865 --> 00:07:03,965
Ok.
147
00:07:05,868 --> 00:07:07,902
Give that gal a promotion!
148
00:07:11,239 --> 00:07:13,507
Your dad seems to
be an ok fella.
149
00:07:13,575 --> 00:07:15,376
He is. Thanks.
150
00:07:15,443 --> 00:07:17,211
Treasure him, Carrie.
151
00:07:17,279 --> 00:07:19,714
Do you know, sometimes we hear
152
00:07:19,782 --> 00:07:23,017
what our elder statespeople
say, but we don't listen.
153
00:07:23,085 --> 00:07:25,219
Uh, what's the difference?
154
00:07:25,287 --> 00:07:27,121
Well, to hear is just to hear,
155
00:07:27,189 --> 00:07:30,091
but to listen, that's
hearing and then some.
156
00:07:32,194 --> 00:07:33,494
Got it.
157
00:07:33,562 --> 00:07:35,763
By the way, I wanted to
mention if he's interested,
158
00:07:35,831 --> 00:07:37,899
we've started a senior
jobs program here.
159
00:07:37,966 --> 00:07:41,435
You know, something to give the old
people a sense of dignity and purpose.
160
00:07:42,404 --> 00:07:44,072
Pays $3.50 an hour.
161
00:07:46,474 --> 00:07:49,410
So, w-what are you saying? You
want my dad to work here?
162
00:07:49,477 --> 00:07:51,245
Every day? If he's interested.
163
00:07:52,581 --> 00:07:55,282
Oh, that's awfully nice, but no...
I don't... no.
164
00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:56,684
You sure?
165
00:07:56,752 --> 00:07:58,853
Y-y-yeah, he wouldn't be interested.
N-no, yeah.
166
00:07:58,921 --> 00:07:59,954
Well, it's out there.
167
00:08:00,022 --> 00:08:01,222
Ok. Ok.
168
00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:14,836
What ya got going there, Fonzie?
169
00:08:16,605 --> 00:08:19,207
Ah, there's this I.P.S.
Calendar for charity.
170
00:08:19,274 --> 00:08:22,676
Deacon and I are both
going for the last spot.
171
00:08:22,745 --> 00:08:24,678
Doug, uh, can I bounce
something off you?
172
00:08:24,747 --> 00:08:26,714
Yeah, you know what? Take
my picture first, though.
173
00:08:26,782 --> 00:08:28,382
I just... I need it for a...
There you go.
174
00:08:28,450 --> 00:08:29,984
Whoa, what the hell.
175
00:08:30,052 --> 00:08:31,418
You got, like, half my face!
176
00:08:31,486 --> 00:08:33,387
Well, honey, I need to talk
to you about something.
177
00:08:33,455 --> 00:08:34,989
All right, but I
need a good picture.
178
00:08:35,057 --> 00:08:36,624
Stand over there.
The light's better.
179
00:08:36,691 --> 00:08:37,825
Over there. Over there.
180
00:08:37,893 --> 00:08:39,794
Ok, but don't take it yet.
I'm not ready yet.
181
00:08:39,862 --> 00:08:42,230
Let me get set here. So,
what's the problem?
182
00:08:42,297 --> 00:08:46,100
All right. So, there's this part-time
job available at my office,
183
00:08:46,168 --> 00:08:49,070
and Mr. Pruzan said my dad
could have it if he wanted it.
184
00:08:49,138 --> 00:08:50,504
Are you ready yet? Yeah, yeah.
185
00:08:50,572 --> 00:08:52,473
Ok. Wait, w-wait!
186
00:08:52,540 --> 00:08:55,109
What's my best look?
Should I smile?
187
00:08:56,111 --> 00:08:59,080
Or pout, like this.
188
00:08:59,148 --> 00:09:03,184
All right, well, if those are my
choices, I reluctantly take pout.
189
00:09:05,254 --> 00:09:07,454
I said pout, not constipated.
190
00:09:10,458 --> 00:09:12,359
All right, so what do
you think I should do?
191
00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:14,495
Do you think I should let
dad work at my office?
192
00:09:14,562 --> 00:09:15,663
No!
193
00:09:15,730 --> 00:09:17,131
No.
194
00:09:19,367 --> 00:09:22,103
I did say no, but I
feel terrible about it.
195
00:09:22,171 --> 00:09:24,438
I mean, he has nothing
else going on in his life.
196
00:09:24,506 --> 00:09:26,107
I mean, nothing. Sure he does.
197
00:09:26,175 --> 00:09:29,643
He gets that
magazine now, right?
198
00:09:29,711 --> 00:09:32,680
He'd love to work there, too. I mean,
you should have seen him today.
199
00:09:32,747 --> 00:09:34,715
He had this little peppy
bounce in his step,
200
00:09:34,783 --> 00:09:38,186
like... like after he
takes his blue pills.
201
00:09:38,253 --> 00:09:40,054
So then let him work there.
202
00:09:40,122 --> 00:09:43,157
I can't! Because every second I'll be
worried if he's going to say something
203
00:09:43,225 --> 00:09:44,792
or do something to embarrass me.
204
00:09:44,860 --> 00:09:47,228
You know, he tipped one
of the partners today.
205
00:09:47,296 --> 00:09:49,596
And not a lot.
206
00:09:49,664 --> 00:09:51,966
Hey, a minute's just about
up, and here we come.
207
00:09:52,034 --> 00:09:54,568
Coming into focus now. And...
208
00:09:56,004 --> 00:09:57,504
Wow.
209
00:09:57,572 --> 00:10:01,075
Time to cram some fake
crap into my bio.
210
00:10:01,143 --> 00:10:02,910
I can't let him work there.
You know why?
211
00:10:02,978 --> 00:10:05,112
Because if he works there,
then I'll go crazy.
212
00:10:05,180 --> 00:10:07,215
If I go crazy,
then they fire me.
213
00:10:07,282 --> 00:10:09,083
If they fire me,
we lose the house,
214
00:10:09,151 --> 00:10:10,417
and he has to live in a crate.
215
00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:13,520
So really, I'm doing
this for him.
216
00:10:15,357 --> 00:10:16,523
Right?
217
00:10:19,461 --> 00:10:20,761
Ok, good.
218
00:10:27,069 --> 00:10:28,769
Morning. Dad.
219
00:10:28,837 --> 00:10:30,371
Morning, cupcake.
220
00:10:30,438 --> 00:10:32,306
I see you're busy. That's great.
221
00:10:32,374 --> 00:10:36,310
It's great to be busy, isn't it?
You're a busy, busy little bee, huh?
222
00:10:36,378 --> 00:10:39,380
Well, I am just going
to head out to work,
223
00:10:39,447 --> 00:10:42,649
and let you get back
to your reading.
224
00:10:42,717 --> 00:10:44,518
What are you reading,
an instruction book?
225
00:10:44,586 --> 00:10:46,988
Yeah, for the electric knife.
226
00:10:47,055 --> 00:10:48,923
Do we have an electric knife?
227
00:10:48,991 --> 00:10:52,226
I didn't see one, but if it
ever turns up, I'll be ready.
228
00:10:52,294 --> 00:10:54,195
Great, great.
229
00:10:54,263 --> 00:10:55,796
Now where are my glasses?
230
00:10:55,864 --> 00:10:58,699
The print on this
warranty card is so tiny.
231
00:11:00,468 --> 00:11:01,535
Here you go.
232
00:11:01,603 --> 00:11:03,504
Oh, thank you, darling.
233
00:11:03,571 --> 00:11:05,172
You're a good daughter.
234
00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:08,309
Please, it's...
Bye, ok, bye-bye.
235
00:11:10,379 --> 00:11:12,546
Have a good day at work. Ok.
236
00:11:17,386 --> 00:11:18,485
Dad,
237
00:11:19,654 --> 00:11:21,188
get your coat.
238
00:11:24,459 --> 00:11:26,493
♪ Oh, ba boppity beep beep
239
00:11:26,561 --> 00:11:31,465
♪ boppity boo boo be
ba ba ba ba bah ♪
240
00:11:31,533 --> 00:11:33,067
Here you go, young lady.
Your mail,
241
00:11:33,135 --> 00:11:35,136
and what's this in your ear?
242
00:11:35,203 --> 00:11:37,504
A mint, for you!
243
00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:40,874
Uh, ok, thank you.
244
00:11:40,943 --> 00:11:42,676
You're very welcome.
245
00:11:42,744 --> 00:11:45,246
Oh, hello, miss. I'm sorry.
246
00:11:45,314 --> 00:11:47,448
I forget the name.
247
00:11:47,515 --> 00:11:49,783
What ya got there, dad?
Y-you got some mints?
248
00:11:49,851 --> 00:11:52,019
I'm giving them out to
everyone with the mail.
249
00:11:52,087 --> 00:11:55,189
It's an icebreaker. You start
out by talking about the mints.
250
00:11:55,257 --> 00:11:57,124
The next thing you
know, you're pals.
251
00:11:57,192 --> 00:11:58,826
I learned that on an airplane
252
00:11:58,893 --> 00:12:01,262
sitting next to a Mr.
Gil Gerard.
253
00:12:03,565 --> 00:12:06,968
I guess. I just wish you weren't
reaching into people's ears.
254
00:12:08,236 --> 00:12:09,837
Darling, you are so cute.
255
00:12:09,904 --> 00:12:12,906
It's not really in their ear.
I palm it.
256
00:12:16,378 --> 00:12:18,346
Even so.
257
00:12:18,413 --> 00:12:20,381
Pardon me, my duties await.
258
00:12:20,449 --> 00:12:22,950
Hey, Eddie! Got an
air mail for you.
259
00:12:34,396 --> 00:12:35,896
Hey, buddy.
260
00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:38,032
Hey, it's Doug half-a-man.
261
00:12:40,002 --> 00:12:41,835
Half-a-man instead of Heffernan.
262
00:12:41,903 --> 00:12:44,305
That's great. I like that.
That's good.
263
00:12:44,373 --> 00:12:46,040
Hey, what you got
there, peanut butter?
264
00:12:46,108 --> 00:12:47,608
Yep. I like peanut butter.
265
00:12:47,675 --> 00:12:48,842
Spreads nice and easy.
266
00:12:48,910 --> 00:12:51,445
Speaking of which,
my mother says hi.
267
00:12:53,248 --> 00:12:54,748
What do you want?
268
00:12:54,816 --> 00:12:57,184
Actually, you know what?
It's about the calendar.
269
00:12:57,252 --> 00:13:00,121
I just thought that, you know, if
you could put in a good word for me
270
00:13:00,188 --> 00:13:02,189
with the p.R. Guys, and
while you were doing that,
271
00:13:02,257 --> 00:13:04,258
I... I could load your
truck or do your rounds.
272
00:13:04,326 --> 00:13:06,660
Doug, save your breath.
You're in.
273
00:13:06,728 --> 00:13:08,162
Really? I got it?
274
00:13:08,230 --> 00:13:09,997
Yeah, I don't know what the
guys up there are sniffing,
275
00:13:10,065 --> 00:13:12,666
but, uh, it's all
you there, lumpy.
276
00:13:12,734 --> 00:13:14,902
All right, thanks.
277
00:13:14,969 --> 00:13:16,837
Hey, spero, I forgot.
278
00:13:16,905 --> 00:13:18,406
Who... who did you say they
were picking for the calendar?
279
00:13:18,473 --> 00:13:20,241
You the man. What?
280
00:13:20,308 --> 00:13:21,575
I'm the man.
281
00:13:21,643 --> 00:13:23,610
Now, I-I'm confused, see.
282
00:13:23,678 --> 00:13:26,280
So you're saying that Mr.
Palmer here not the man.
283
00:13:26,348 --> 00:13:27,981
That's right. Well,
I can't believe it.
284
00:13:28,050 --> 00:13:29,850
What the hell are they
thinking upstairs?
285
00:13:29,918 --> 00:13:31,452
It wasn't what they
were thinking,
286
00:13:31,520 --> 00:13:33,754
so much as what they were feeling.
You know what I'm saying?
287
00:13:33,821 --> 00:13:35,856
'Cause sexy is sexy!
288
00:13:37,426 --> 00:13:39,260
You drive safe now.
289
00:13:55,135 --> 00:13:57,136
Carrie? Have you
seen your father?
290
00:13:57,203 --> 00:13:58,804
I've got a bunch
of outgoing mail.
291
00:13:58,872 --> 00:14:01,306
You're looking for Arthur? He just
went into the conference room.
292
00:14:01,374 --> 00:14:03,542
Now? But I thought the
partners were in there
293
00:14:03,609 --> 00:14:07,012
meeting with those congressmen
from the finance committee.
294
00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:10,015
All I know is Arthur just walked
in there with a big bag of mints.
295
00:14:15,388 --> 00:14:20,292
All right. You're dreaming, Carrie.
Just wake up.
296
00:14:20,359 --> 00:14:23,428
Wake up. Wakey, wakey. Ok.
297
00:14:25,131 --> 00:14:26,264
Crap!
298
00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:28,901
And then another time...
299
00:14:28,968 --> 00:14:31,236
Ah, excuse me. Hi, dad.
300
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:34,740
Listen, uh, people are out
there asking for their mints.
301
00:14:34,808 --> 00:14:36,108
Sweetheart, I was
in the middle...
302
00:14:36,176 --> 00:14:38,210
He gets a little confused sometimes.
Come on, buddy.
303
00:14:38,277 --> 00:14:40,212
Let's not bother these
nice people anymore.
304
00:14:40,279 --> 00:14:44,282
He's not bothering us. We just asked
him to recommend a good deli.
305
00:14:47,153 --> 00:14:51,423
Oh, ok, good. You've got the
right guy here, I'll tell ya.
306
00:14:51,490 --> 00:14:54,426
You know what we call him: The deli lama.
That's him, ok.
307
00:14:54,493 --> 00:14:57,963
All right... Oh... oh. You don't...
Yeah, ok, good. Bye.
308
00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:05,137
Darling, I'm going now.
309
00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:07,773
Going? I thought you
worked until 4:00.
310
00:15:07,841 --> 00:15:10,242
Actually, I was let go.
311
00:15:10,309 --> 00:15:13,445
What? They fired you?
312
00:15:13,512 --> 00:15:16,281
Apparently there wasn't
room in the budget for me.
313
00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:20,152
Dad, that's absurd. They pay
you less than minimum wage.
314
00:15:20,220 --> 00:15:23,889
Excuse me. Uh, Mr. Pruzan, why
did you guys fire my dad?
315
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:25,257
We didn't. He quit.
316
00:15:25,324 --> 00:15:27,893
Oh, you must be mixed up.
I was let go.
317
00:15:27,961 --> 00:15:30,996
Sir, you just came up to
me and said, "I quit."
318
00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:33,598
It was merely to save
face after I was fired.
319
00:15:33,666 --> 00:15:35,500
Who fired you?
320
00:15:35,568 --> 00:15:37,435
Why, boss terwilliger.
321
00:15:39,538 --> 00:15:41,039
Dad, what are you talking about?
322
00:15:41,107 --> 00:15:43,842
Look, I was fired, ok? Fired.
323
00:15:43,910 --> 00:15:46,812
And that's all I have
to say on the subject.
324
00:15:48,848 --> 00:15:50,816
There is no boss terwilliger.
325
00:15:50,884 --> 00:15:52,184
I know. Ok.
326
00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:57,756
Doug, come on. I'm
growing a beard here.
327
00:15:58,858 --> 00:16:01,827
There he is. Very nice.
328
00:16:01,895 --> 00:16:04,163
I don't know. You don't
think it looks too stupid?
329
00:16:04,230 --> 00:16:05,964
It's for a charity.
330
00:16:06,032 --> 00:16:09,467
Every month has a gimmick.
You're the April-showers guy.
331
00:16:09,535 --> 00:16:12,237
Just be happy you're
not baby new year.
332
00:16:12,305 --> 00:16:14,072
Yeah, I guess I
caught a break there.
333
00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:16,441
All right. Nice and loose here.
Nice and loose. Ready to work?
334
00:16:16,509 --> 00:16:18,110
Ok, you're thinking:
335
00:16:18,178 --> 00:16:21,079
"Boy, I've got a special
delivery for you!"
336
00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:24,049
That's it! All right. Give
me that precious look.
337
00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:25,517
Work the Dolly. Work the Dolly.
338
00:16:25,584 --> 00:16:28,086
Work the umbrella. Come
on, work the umbrella.
339
00:16:28,154 --> 00:16:30,222
Kind of scoot around it.
That's it. That's it.
340
00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:32,357
Give me that... A
little more precious.
341
00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:36,795
Not that, no. That! That's the money!
That's the money. Yes!
342
00:16:36,863 --> 00:16:40,098
Ok. Good. Good. Your... your
tie's a little crooked there.
343
00:16:40,166 --> 00:16:41,266
Ok. Just a little...
344
00:16:41,334 --> 00:16:42,567
Like this? No, the other side.
345
00:16:42,635 --> 00:16:44,002
Here. Let me get it.
346
00:16:44,070 --> 00:16:46,538
It's going so well. Yeah.
That's better.
347
00:16:46,605 --> 00:16:49,007
Now, I want you to let
all your natural charm
348
00:16:49,075 --> 00:16:50,575
just seep out, huh? Ok, yeah.
349
00:16:50,643 --> 00:16:53,478
Man, are you firm. Wow. Working out, huh?
Nice traps.
350
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:54,612
Huh?
351
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:56,548
Nice traps. Yeah.
352
00:16:56,615 --> 00:16:58,416
Mmm.
353
00:16:58,484 --> 00:17:00,485
How about, uh, we get back
to the calendar there?
354
00:17:00,553 --> 00:17:02,054
We got some juveniles
to save, huh?
355
00:17:02,121 --> 00:17:04,789
Wow! That's a lot of boy. Yeah.
356
00:17:04,858 --> 00:17:08,026
Doug, uh, I got to
level with you.
357
00:17:08,094 --> 00:17:10,262
There's no juveniles.
358
00:17:10,330 --> 00:17:12,497
No juveniles? No juveniles.
359
00:17:12,565 --> 00:17:15,467
No juveniles, no
calendar, just you, me.
360
00:17:17,670 --> 00:17:20,105
And a whole lot of
sexual tension.
361
00:17:22,675 --> 00:17:24,142
Not getting that.
362
00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:25,543
Come on, Doug.
363
00:17:25,611 --> 00:17:27,346
Wrap those linebackin'
meat hooks around me,
364
00:17:27,413 --> 00:17:28,613
and pull me into the huddle.
365
00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:29,982
What's going on here, man? Whoa!
366
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,217
What are you tellin' me? Are
you tellin' me you're gay?
367
00:17:32,285 --> 00:17:36,654
I'm not gay gay. I'm what
you call bi-curious.
368
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:38,257
Whatever. Look, I gotta go, man.
369
00:17:38,324 --> 00:17:41,059
I'm really late for
something not gay.
370
00:17:41,127 --> 00:17:44,496
Oh, God! I should've
never done this.
371
00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:46,464
Hey, don't tell anybody
about this, huh?
372
00:17:46,532 --> 00:17:49,034
All right, look, I'm not going
to tell anybody you're gay, ok?
373
00:17:49,102 --> 00:17:50,568
Thanks, Doug. Thanks, man. Ok.
374
00:17:50,636 --> 00:17:52,237
Hey, Doug, thanks.
375
00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:53,872
Ok. All right, man.
Ok. There you go.
376
00:17:53,940 --> 00:17:55,040
Gotcha!
377
00:17:56,943 --> 00:17:58,843
Hey, Heffernan.
378
00:17:58,912 --> 00:18:00,545
You are looking good!
379
00:18:00,613 --> 00:18:02,647
Oh, man! You should've
seen your face.
380
00:18:02,715 --> 00:18:04,849
I got to go somewhere not gay.
381
00:18:06,452 --> 00:18:09,054
All right, guys. Knock it off.
Enough, enough. All right?
382
00:18:09,122 --> 00:18:11,256
Leave him alone. You
all right, pal?
383
00:18:11,324 --> 00:18:12,391
I'm ok.
384
00:18:12,458 --> 00:18:13,558
Good.
385
00:18:13,626 --> 00:18:16,795
You want to go to
the prom with me?
386
00:18:16,862 --> 00:18:19,831
Yeah, funny, man! You guys are funny.
Funny stuff, guys!
387
00:18:19,899 --> 00:18:21,833
It was a goof, porks.
388
00:18:21,901 --> 00:18:23,902
I'd tell you to lighten up, but
that might be hard for you.
389
00:18:23,970 --> 00:18:26,204
You know what, man? I had
enough of your crap, man!
390
00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:27,439
Hey, keep your hands off me.
391
00:18:27,506 --> 00:18:28,606
Oh! God, oh!
392
00:18:28,674 --> 00:18:29,774
What the hell did you do?
393
00:18:29,842 --> 00:18:31,043
He came at me. You saw it.
394
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,744
Oh, God. Oh, God,
it's broken, man.
395
00:18:32,812 --> 00:18:34,413
Oh, my God. He's really hurt.
It's broken!
396
00:18:34,480 --> 00:18:36,415
Somebody get some help now! Now!
397
00:18:36,482 --> 00:18:38,116
Look, it was just a joke, man.
You ok?
398
00:18:38,184 --> 00:18:40,552
Just a joke. It's ketchup. Mmm.
399
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:42,887
But it tastes like victory!
400
00:18:42,956 --> 00:18:44,756
Man!
401
00:18:44,824 --> 00:18:46,024
You knew the whole time?
402
00:18:46,092 --> 00:18:47,926
Oh, yeah, man! You kiddin' me?
403
00:18:47,994 --> 00:18:49,361
Spero told me this morning.
404
00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:51,063
See, you thought you
were getting me,
405
00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:53,198
but I flipped her around on you!
406
00:18:53,266 --> 00:18:54,699
Yabba dabba!
407
00:19:00,006 --> 00:19:01,940
Nice work. Can I
get the film now?
408
00:19:02,008 --> 00:19:04,542
Yeah. It's digital. That way,
they go right on the Internet.
409
00:19:04,610 --> 00:19:05,844
Sweet!
410
00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:16,921
Hello.
411
00:19:16,990 --> 00:19:19,591
Dad, where have you been? I have
been trying to call you for hours!
412
00:19:19,658 --> 00:19:22,394
Uh, I just went up to
the roof to think.
413
00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:24,396
Gets a little breezy
86 floors up,
414
00:19:24,464 --> 00:19:27,366
especially when the
helicopters are landing.
415
00:19:29,469 --> 00:19:31,303
Dad, look, about
what happened today,
416
00:19:31,371 --> 00:19:32,570
I want... Darling,
417
00:19:32,638 --> 00:19:33,972
can I tell you a little story?
418
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:35,607
Sure.
419
00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:38,043
Look, when I was 8 years old,
420
00:19:38,111 --> 00:19:40,278
I was chosen from dozens of boys
421
00:19:40,346 --> 00:19:42,780
to sing a solo from ave Maria
422
00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:45,550
at my church choir recital.
423
00:19:45,618 --> 00:19:48,853
It was the greatest
honor of my young life.
424
00:19:48,921 --> 00:19:50,788
The night of the recital,
425
00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:53,858
my father was sitting
right in the 2nd row.
426
00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:56,294
He heckled me.
427
00:19:57,830 --> 00:19:59,164
Heckled you?
428
00:19:59,232 --> 00:20:01,466
Oh, yeah. He called
it tough love.
429
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:04,469
Said it would make me a
better choir singer.
430
00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:06,338
But I was mortified.
431
00:20:06,406 --> 00:20:09,274
Yeah. Dad, that's...
that's terrible.
432
00:20:09,342 --> 00:20:13,478
Today you had the same
look on your face as I did
433
00:20:15,181 --> 00:20:16,614
at my recital.
434
00:20:18,418 --> 00:20:21,686
I'm sorry I embarrass
you, Carrie.
435
00:20:21,754 --> 00:20:24,589
Dad, no. No, no, no, no.
436
00:20:24,657 --> 00:20:26,925
You didn't do anything wrong.
437
00:20:26,992 --> 00:20:29,894
I completely overreacted.
438
00:20:29,962 --> 00:20:33,932
I guess sometimes I feel like I have
to walk around apologizing for you,
439
00:20:33,999 --> 00:20:37,602
but that's... that's my problem.
That's all me.
440
00:20:37,670 --> 00:20:41,540
Well, perhaps my prior antics
have left you a bit gun-shy.
441
00:20:42,141 --> 00:20:43,775
Well, true.
442
00:20:43,842 --> 00:20:48,180
I could've done without your bomb
jokes at LA guardia last month.
443
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:52,917
But, even so, I'm sorry
about the way I acted.
444
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:57,122
I... I was touched
that you wanted to,
445
00:20:57,190 --> 00:20:59,391
you know, be part of my life.
446
00:21:02,128 --> 00:21:04,162
I love you, sweetheart.
447
00:21:04,230 --> 00:21:06,198
I love you, too, dad.
448
00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:07,599
You know what?
449
00:21:07,666 --> 00:21:09,701
Why don't we forget about
all this and start fresh?
450
00:21:09,768 --> 00:21:14,072
Tomorrow I will talk to
Pruzan and get your job back.
451
00:21:14,140 --> 00:21:15,873
No, no. I wouldn't hear of it.
452
00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:18,443
To be honest, I find
this place mind-numbing.
453
00:21:18,511 --> 00:21:21,279
How you work here and not
put a bullet in your head
454
00:21:21,347 --> 00:21:23,748
is beyond me.
455
00:21:23,816 --> 00:21:26,585
Well, can I at least buy you
a hot dog on the corner?
456
00:21:26,652 --> 00:21:28,820
I'll go for that. Ok.
457
00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:43,668
♪ Ave Maria ♪
458
00:21:47,706 --> 00:21:49,107
Dad!
459
00:21:59,076 --> 00:22:03,913
♪ Ave Maria ♪
460
00:22:06,818 --> 00:22:08,819
you call that singing?
461
00:22:12,657 --> 00:22:14,991
You sound like a little girl!
462
00:22:17,495 --> 00:22:19,195
Nice haircut!
463
00:22:19,263 --> 00:22:21,331
Use a bigger bowl next time!
464
00:22:23,067 --> 00:22:24,568
That's my boy.