1 00:00:02,335 --> 00:00:06,797 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY CARSEY-WERNER AND FOX BROADCASTING 2 00:00:18,476 --> 00:00:20,144 OH MY GOD. 3 00:00:20,311 --> 00:00:21,645 FROM UP HERE, 4 00:00:21,813 --> 00:00:26,400 POINT PLACE LOOKS JUST LIKE PARIS. 5 00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:28,986 YOU THINK THAT LOOKS LIKE PARIS? 6 00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:31,822 GOD, NO WONDER YOU THINK KELSO COULD BE A MODEL. 7 00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:33,824 WHOA! 8 00:00:33,950 --> 00:00:36,326 I COULD SO BE A MODEL. 9 00:00:37,454 --> 00:00:38,454 COME ON, MAN. 10 00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:39,913 SHUT UP AND JUST KEEP PAINTING. 11 00:00:40,081 --> 00:00:41,206 IT'S DONE! 12 00:00:41,374 --> 00:00:43,375 HA-HA! 13 00:00:43,543 --> 00:00:45,044 GENTLEMEN, WE HAVE FINALLY DONE IT. 14 00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,921 A POT LEAF ON THE WATER TOWER! 15 00:00:52,552 --> 00:00:56,889 THIS IS THE PROUDEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE. 16 00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,558 IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE A POT LEAF. 17 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:01,060 WHAT? 18 00:01:01,227 --> 00:01:05,981 IT LOOKS LIKE A HAND GIVING THE FINGER. 19 00:01:06,149 --> 00:01:08,025 IT DOESN'T HAVE TO LOOK PERFECT, HYDE. 20 00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:09,568 IT'S ART. 21 00:01:09,736 --> 00:01:12,196 GET UP AND MAKE IT BETTER! 22 00:01:12,363 --> 00:01:14,239 FINE! 23 00:01:16,367 --> 00:01:19,119 JUST, YEAH, MAKE IT WIDER RIGHT UP THERE. 24 00:01:19,287 --> 00:01:20,704 YEAH. OUT FURTHER, THOUGH. 25 00:01:20,872 --> 00:01:22,372 YEAH, RIGHT UP THERE. 26 00:01:22,540 --> 00:01:23,916 OHH! 27 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:26,126 OH MY GOD. MICHAEL! 28 00:01:26,294 --> 00:01:27,586 [THUD] 29 00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:29,254 HEY, KELSO! 30 00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:30,714 (KELSO) YEAH? 31 00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:34,551 HOW'S IT LOOK FROM DOWN THERE? 32 00:01:36,137 --> 00:01:39,723 (KELSO) IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S GIVING ME THE FINGER. 33 00:01:47,023 --> 00:01:48,524 YOU GUYS, THIS IS SO STUPID. 34 00:01:48,691 --> 00:01:50,275 WE SHOULD JUST TAKE HIM TO THE HOSPITAL. 35 00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:52,236 NO, JACKIE, THEN MY DAD WILL FIND OU... 36 00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:54,613 AAH! AAH! 37 00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:56,115 SHUT UP! 38 00:01:56,282 --> 00:01:57,282 OKAY, MY MOM'S A NURSE. 39 00:01:57,450 --> 00:01:59,493 I'M GOING TO GO WAKE HER UP. MAYBE SHE CAN FIX HIM. 40 00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:00,786 JUST DON'T WAKE UP RED, THOUGH, HUH? 41 00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:01,995 HE'LL KILL US ALL. 42 00:02:02,163 --> 00:02:04,289 GEE, YOU THINK? 43 00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:13,132 [PASSIONATE BREATHING] 44 00:02:13,299 --> 00:02:14,299 (KITTY) OH, RED! 45 00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:16,593 (RED) OH, KITTY! 46 00:02:29,065 --> 00:02:31,108 (ERIC) OKAY, LET'S GO. 47 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:34,403 EVERYBODY HOP IN THE CAR, AND LET'S GO NOW. 48 00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:35,571 WHERE'S YOUR MOM? 49 00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:36,697 SHUT UP! 50 00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:39,199 DON'T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT MY MOTHER! 51 00:02:39,367 --> 00:02:43,036 ♪ HANGIN' OUT ♪ 52 00:02:43,204 --> 00:02:46,665 ♪ DOWN THE STREET ♪ 53 00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:50,335 ♪ THE SAME OLD THING ♪ 54 00:02:50,503 --> 00:02:53,922 ♪ WE DID LAST WEEK ♪ 55 00:02:54,090 --> 00:02:57,718 ♪ NOT A THING TO DO ♪ 56 00:02:57,886 --> 00:03:01,221 ♪ BUT TALK TO YOU ♪ 57 00:03:01,389 --> 00:03:05,517 ♪ WHOA, YEAH ♪ 58 00:03:05,685 --> 00:03:08,312 HELLO, WISCONSIN! 59 00:03:15,236 --> 00:03:16,945 NO, DAD... 60 00:03:17,113 --> 00:03:20,824 THERE'S NO WAY THIS COULD'VE BEEN AVOIDED. 61 00:03:22,869 --> 00:03:23,952 YES! 62 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:27,873 YEAH, THE COW KICKED ME AFTER I TIPPED IT OVER. 63 00:03:31,711 --> 00:03:35,839 I'M NOT LYING! 64 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:38,050 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 65 00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:40,510 I LOVE YOU TOO. 66 00:03:41,846 --> 00:03:44,223 HE BOUGHT IT. 67 00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:48,352 UM, EXCUSE ME. UM, YES. UM... 68 00:03:48,519 --> 00:03:52,231 MY FRIEND AND I WOULD LIKE OUR SPONGE BATH NOW, PLEASE. 69 00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:01,281 ERIC, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? 70 00:04:01,449 --> 00:04:04,910 THEY WERE SLEEPING! 71 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,122 MICHAEL, AS GOD IS MY WITNESS, 72 00:04:09,290 --> 00:04:12,501 I WILL NURSE YOU BACK TO HEALTH. 73 00:04:12,669 --> 00:04:14,336 THANKS, JACKIE. 74 00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:17,089 I'M IN A LOT OF PAIN. 75 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:20,175 OHH, MY POOR BABY. 76 00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:24,805 ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT. 77 00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:27,432 I'M GOING. WHOEVER WANTS A RIDE. 78 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,935 [GROANING] 79 00:04:30,687 --> 00:04:33,272 HEY, I'M SORRY ABOUT TONIGHT, YOU GUYS. 80 00:04:33,439 --> 00:04:34,606 SORRY? WHY? 81 00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:37,734 WE GOT TO WATCH YOU FALL, MAN. I HAD A BLAST! 82 00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:41,071 SEE YOU, KELSO. 83 00:04:42,198 --> 00:04:43,740 HYDE IS SUCH A JERK. 84 00:04:43,908 --> 00:04:45,659 THIS IS ALL HIS FAULT. 85 00:04:45,827 --> 00:04:48,287 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 86 00:04:48,454 --> 00:04:51,206 WHO SAID THE POT LEAF WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH? 87 00:04:51,374 --> 00:04:52,541 HYDE DID. 88 00:04:52,709 --> 00:04:56,962 MM-HMM, AND WHO SAID YOU SHOULD LEAN OUT FURTHER? 89 00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:59,047 HYDE DID. 90 00:04:59,215 --> 00:05:01,675 SO WHO MADE YOU FALL OFF THE WATER TOWER? 91 00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:03,260 NO, NO, NO, NO, WAIT, JACKIE. 92 00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:05,679 THAT'S CRAZY. HYDE'S, LIKE, MY BEST FRIEND. 93 00:05:05,847 --> 00:05:07,222 NO, NO, NO, NO. 94 00:05:07,390 --> 00:05:08,849 BRIAN PICCOLO AND GAYLE SAYERS 95 00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:12,019 WERE BEST FRIENDS. 96 00:05:12,186 --> 00:05:15,397 YEAH, BRIAN'S SONG. 97 00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:18,525 I LOVE THAT MOVIE. 98 00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:21,320 SEE, MICHAEL, GAYLE HELD BRIAN'S HAND 99 00:05:21,487 --> 00:05:23,655 AND CRIED AND GAVE HIM SIPS OF COOL WATER 100 00:05:23,823 --> 00:05:27,617 IN HIS HOSPITAL BED. 101 00:05:27,785 --> 00:05:31,330 SO WHERE ARE YOU NOW? 102 00:05:31,497 --> 00:05:35,042 I'M IN A HOSPITAL BED. 103 00:05:35,209 --> 00:05:37,336 AND WHERE'S HYDE? 104 00:05:37,503 --> 00:05:39,963 WELL, HE ISN'T GIVING ME SIPS OF COOL WATER, 105 00:05:40,131 --> 00:05:42,341 THAT'S FOR SURE! 106 00:05:42,508 --> 00:05:45,677 WELL, WE GOT VANDALS IN THIS TOWN. 107 00:05:45,845 --> 00:05:47,429 I WAS DRIVING HOME, AND I SAW THE WATER TOWER 108 00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:51,350 GIVING ME THE FINGER. 109 00:05:51,517 --> 00:05:53,018 VANDALS, YOU SAY? 110 00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:56,646 HMM, WHERE WERE YOU LAST NIGHT, ERIC? 111 00:05:56,814 --> 00:05:59,232 OH, CAN IT, LAURIE. 112 00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:00,817 ERIC, YOU LOOK PALE. 113 00:06:00,985 --> 00:06:04,363 LET ME SEE YOUR EYES. 114 00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:07,699 (KITTY) LOOK AT ME. 115 00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:10,077 ♪ TELL ME THAT YOU LIKE IT ♪ 116 00:06:10,244 --> 00:06:13,163 ♪ YEAH ♪ 117 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:17,709 DO YOU HAVE A FEVER? 118 00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:20,712 OH. 119 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:22,547 I KNOW WHAT YOU NEED. 120 00:06:22,715 --> 00:06:25,217 RIGHT AFTER BREAKFAST, I WANT YOU TO MOW THE LAWN. 121 00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:28,678 THE FRESH AIR WILL DO YOU GOOD. 122 00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:36,436 ERIC, IS SOMETHING BOTHERING YOU? 123 00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:41,691 GOD, MAKE IT STOP! 124 00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:45,737 [PASSIONATE BREATHING] 125 00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:47,239 (RED) OH, KITTY! 126 00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:48,407 [PASSIONATE BREATHING] 127 00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:49,741 (RED) OH, KITTY! 128 00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:51,034 [PASSIONATE BREATHING] 129 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:52,285 (RED) OH, KITTY! 130 00:06:52,453 --> 00:06:54,663 AAH! 131 00:06:58,376 --> 00:06:59,584 (RED) OH, KITTY! 132 00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:02,337 AAH! 133 00:07:08,761 --> 00:07:10,303 [PASSIONATE BREATHING] 134 00:07:10,471 --> 00:07:11,763 (KITTY) OH, RED! 135 00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:16,309 (RED) OH, KITTY! 136 00:07:16,477 --> 00:07:19,312 (KITTY) OH, RED! 137 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:23,400 ♪ TELL ME THAT YOU LIKE IT, YEAH ♪ 138 00:07:25,987 --> 00:07:29,322 ♪ YOU AIN'T GOT NO... ♪ 139 00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:41,376 WELL, OKAY, NOW, UM... 140 00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:44,796 SO FAR, ERIC IS 9 OUT OF 10. 141 00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:46,882 HE'S GOT... HE'S GOT BLOODSHOT EYES, 142 00:07:47,049 --> 00:07:48,675 MOOD SWINGS, IRREGULAR APPETITE, 143 00:07:48,843 --> 00:07:50,135 ODD SLEEPING PATTERNS. 144 00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:53,555 OH, RED, OUR JOHNNY IS HIGH. 145 00:07:55,433 --> 00:07:58,393 KITTY, THAT'S NONSENSE. HE'S NOT ON DRUGS. 146 00:07:58,561 --> 00:08:02,022 HE'S... JUST WEIRD. 147 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,743 MORNING. 148 00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:20,916 HUNGRY? 149 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:22,918 I... I OVERSLEPT. 150 00:08:23,085 --> 00:08:24,336 I'M LATE FOR SCHOOL. 151 00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:27,631 IT'S, UH... BYE. 152 00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:35,972 THAT KID'S ON DOPE. 153 00:08:37,099 --> 00:08:39,893 WELL, I'LL SAY. IT'S SUNDAY. 154 00:08:51,739 --> 00:08:54,741 BOY, THESE AFTER-SCHOOL SPECIALS ARE THRILLING. 155 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:57,994 I MEAN, WHO KNEW IT TAKES ONLY ONE BEER 156 00:08:58,162 --> 00:09:00,997 TO TURN A CHEERLEADER INTO A WHORE? 157 00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:06,991 YOU KNOW, FEZ, THIS SHOW CONTAINS 158 00:09:07,129 --> 00:09:08,713 AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE. 159 00:09:08,881 --> 00:09:11,550 THAT VERY THING HAPPENED TO A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE. 160 00:09:11,717 --> 00:09:12,717 REALLY? 161 00:09:12,802 --> 00:09:15,554 MM-HMM. 162 00:09:16,722 --> 00:09:20,100 MAY I ASK WHO? 163 00:09:21,435 --> 00:09:25,146 MAN, THAT IS ONE DRUNK, SLUTTY CHEERLEADER. 164 00:09:26,190 --> 00:09:27,566 THERE GO HER POM-POMS. 165 00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:29,067 ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! 166 00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:30,735 THAT IS QUITE ENOUGH! 167 00:09:30,903 --> 00:09:32,904 EVERYWHERE I LOOK NOW IT'S SEX, SEX, SEX! 168 00:09:33,072 --> 00:09:34,155 WELL, IT'S DISGUSTING, 169 00:09:34,323 --> 00:09:37,284 AND I WILL NOT HAVE IT IN MY BASEMENT! 170 00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:40,287 ERIC, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? 171 00:09:40,454 --> 00:09:42,581 OH, WELL, EXCUSE ME, DONNA, FOR HAVING 172 00:09:42,748 --> 00:09:45,417 A LITTLE MORAL FIBER. 173 00:09:48,337 --> 00:09:50,255 OKAY, WELL, I'M GOING TO GO CHECK ON MICHAEL. 174 00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:51,923 (HYDE) YEAH, HOW'S HE DOING? 175 00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:54,092 OH! OH YEAH, LIKE YOU CARE. 176 00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:56,511 WHY DON'T YOU JUST APOLOGIZE? 177 00:09:56,679 --> 00:09:59,014 APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT? 178 00:09:59,181 --> 00:10:00,515 WELL, IF YOU DON'T KNOW, 179 00:10:00,683 --> 00:10:03,602 THEN OBVIOUSLY YOU'RE A BIG FAT JERK! 180 00:10:05,479 --> 00:10:08,690 OKAY, SHE'S NUTS. 181 00:10:08,858 --> 00:10:11,568 I KNOW. YOU ARE NOT FAT. 182 00:10:22,663 --> 00:10:23,663 ERIC. 183 00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:26,916 GET OFF MY MOM... WHAT? 184 00:10:28,252 --> 00:10:29,377 WHAT IS IT WITH YOU? 185 00:10:29,545 --> 00:10:33,757 YOU'VE BEEN EXTRA LOSERY LATELY. 186 00:10:33,924 --> 00:10:35,800 I SAW MOM AND DAD HAVING SEX. 187 00:10:35,968 --> 00:10:39,304 [ALARM RINGS] 188 00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:43,642 OH! 189 00:10:43,809 --> 00:10:45,060 OH, YOU POOR THING! 190 00:10:45,227 --> 00:10:47,937 IT'S ALL RIGHT. IT'S OKAY, BABY'S FINE. 191 00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:49,981 OH, LAURIE, IT WAS HORRIBLE. 192 00:10:50,149 --> 00:10:52,776 I CAN'T GET THE IMAGE OUT OF MY MIND! 193 00:10:52,943 --> 00:10:55,570 I MEAN, IT WAS MOM AND DAD, BUT THEY WERE... 194 00:10:55,738 --> 00:10:56,946 THEY WERE LIKE A PAIR OF WILDEBEESTS 195 00:10:57,114 --> 00:11:00,617 ON A NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC SPECIAL. 196 00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:04,496 [NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC SPECIAL TYPE THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 197 00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:08,291 (NARRATOR) DEEP IN THE UNEXPLORED PSYCHE OF A CONFUSED YOUNG MAN, 198 00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:13,630 IS A WILDERNESS CALLED... WILD WISCONSIN. 199 00:11:14,548 --> 00:11:15,965 AFTER SEVERAL DAYS OF TRACKING, 200 00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:19,511 WE FINALLY LOCATED THE DEN OF THE WILY RED. 201 00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:21,846 HERE WE SEE SUBURBUS SEXMANIACUS 202 00:11:22,014 --> 00:11:25,183 TRACKING HIS PREY THROUGH THE LIVING ROOM. 203 00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:29,229 OBSERVE AS THE MALE INDICATES HIS INTEREST IN MATING 204 00:11:29,397 --> 00:11:32,399 BY MAKING LOUD, AGGRESSIVE NOISES. 205 00:11:32,566 --> 00:11:36,027 [WHIRRING] 206 00:11:37,196 --> 00:11:39,614 THE FEMALE'S ATTRACTIVE DOUBLE-KNIT PANTSUIT 207 00:11:39,782 --> 00:11:44,703 AND SCARLET LIPS SIGNAL HER READINESS. 208 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:47,539 THIS DISPLAY IS NOT LOST ON THE MALE. 209 00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:49,082 OH, THERE HE GOES. 210 00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:51,334 LET'S WATCH. 211 00:11:51,502 --> 00:11:54,170 [CLINK] 212 00:11:57,883 --> 00:12:00,927 ♪ TELL ME SOMETHING GOOD ♪ 213 00:12:01,095 --> 00:12:03,972 ♪ TELL ME, TELL ME, TELL ME ♪ 214 00:12:04,140 --> 00:12:08,685 ♪ TELL ME THAT YOU LIKE IT, YEAH ♪ 215 00:12:10,938 --> 00:12:15,942 ERIC, I AM SO SORRY. 216 00:12:16,110 --> 00:12:17,819 BUT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND. 217 00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:20,029 MOM AND DAD ARE IN LOVE. 218 00:12:20,197 --> 00:12:22,407 THEY HAVE URGES AND NEEDS, JUST LIKE US. 219 00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,534 NO URGES, NO NEEDS! 220 00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:30,248 I LEARNED IN PSYCHOLOGY CLASS 221 00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:32,751 THAT WHAT YOU WENT THROUGH IS TRAUMATIC, 222 00:12:32,918 --> 00:12:34,127 BUT DON'T WORRY, 223 00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:37,714 MANY PEOPLE HAVE HAD THIS SAME EXPERIENCE. 224 00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:39,507 REALLY? 225 00:12:39,675 --> 00:12:42,385 AND THEY TURNED OUT ALL RIGHT? 226 00:12:43,262 --> 00:12:46,931 WELL, SOME OF THEM TURNED OUT TO BE SERIAL KILLERS. 227 00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:51,936 BUT I'M SURE THAT'S JUST A COINCIDENCE. 228 00:12:52,104 --> 00:12:54,272 BUT WHATEVER. 229 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,065 YOU KNOW WHAT THE SAD THING IS? 230 00:12:56,233 --> 00:12:59,110 I ACTUALLY THINK YOU'RE TRYING TO BE NICE. 231 00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:00,445 YEAH. 232 00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:02,947 IT'S JUST NOT MY STRONG SUIT. 233 00:13:03,115 --> 00:13:04,866 SORRY. 234 00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:08,495 SO I'LL BE ALL RIGHT? 235 00:13:08,662 --> 00:13:10,622 NO. 236 00:13:21,091 --> 00:13:29,091 ♪♪♪ 237 00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:32,477 DONNA, I'M REALLY NOT IN THE MOOD. 238 00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:34,103 OH, COME ON. 239 00:13:34,271 --> 00:13:36,898 I'M JUST TRYING TO GET A LITTLE ACTION HERE. 240 00:13:37,775 --> 00:13:39,734 DONNA, I JUST CAN'T. 241 00:13:39,902 --> 00:13:42,320 COME ON. ALL THE OTHER GUYS ARE DOING IT. 242 00:13:46,575 --> 00:13:47,617 WHAT'S GOING ON? 243 00:13:47,785 --> 00:13:49,410 ARE YOU, LIKE, MAD AT ME OR SOMETHING? 244 00:13:49,578 --> 00:13:51,830 IT'S JUST... 245 00:13:52,289 --> 00:13:53,998 DONNA, I SAW MY PARENTS HAVING SEX. 246 00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:55,667 OH GOD! 247 00:13:55,835 --> 00:13:58,086 OH, YEE! 248 00:14:01,382 --> 00:14:03,925 YEAH. 249 00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:07,011 AND YOU LIKED IT, RIGHT? 250 00:14:07,179 --> 00:14:09,013 NO! GOD, NO! THAT'S SICK! 251 00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:10,765 EVERYONE'S SICK! 252 00:14:10,933 --> 00:14:12,016 I'M KIDDING. 253 00:14:12,184 --> 00:14:13,643 ERIC, I'M KIDDING. 254 00:14:13,811 --> 00:14:17,605 OH, GOOD ONE. 255 00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:20,942 ALL RIGHT, LOOK, 256 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:22,026 I'M GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING 257 00:14:22,194 --> 00:14:24,279 I'VE NEVER TOLD ANYBODY ELSE. 258 00:14:24,446 --> 00:14:27,615 ALL RIGHT? 259 00:14:27,783 --> 00:14:30,660 WHEN I WAS 12, I SAW MY PARENTS DOING IT. 260 00:14:32,288 --> 00:14:34,038 HOW DID YOU GET OVER IT? 261 00:14:34,206 --> 00:14:37,584 WELL, AT FIRST, I WAS, LIKE, COMPLETELY FREAKED OUT. 262 00:14:37,751 --> 00:14:41,546 BUT THEN EVENTUALLY THE PAIN RECEDED, 263 00:14:41,714 --> 00:14:44,924 AND I WAS ABLE TO LIVE AGAIN. 264 00:14:45,885 --> 00:14:46,718 DONNA, I DON'T SEE THIS RECEDING. 265 00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,326 I MEAN, I WALKED IN ON RED AND KITTY, 266 00:14:48,470 --> 00:14:49,554 AND THEY WERE... 267 00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:51,931 THEY WERE RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE. 268 00:14:52,725 --> 00:14:54,100 OH, GOD. THAT'S NOTHING. 269 00:14:54,268 --> 00:14:57,228 I CAUGHT MY PARENTS OUTSIDE, IN BROAD DAYLIGHT, 270 00:14:57,396 --> 00:15:00,189 ON THE HAMMOCK. 271 00:15:00,357 --> 00:15:03,484 WHERE I USED TO READ, LIKE, MY NANCY DREW MYSTERIES. 272 00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:08,239 OH, MAN, THAT IS SO MUCH WORSE THAN MINE. 273 00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:12,619 I CAN REMEMBER, LIKE, LITTLE BITS OF NAKED SKIN 274 00:15:12,786 --> 00:15:16,539 PEEKING THOUGH THE HOLES OF THE HAMMOCK. 275 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,959 WOW. 276 00:15:20,127 --> 00:15:23,463 IT'S WEIRD, BUT KNOWING WHAT YOU WENT THROUGH 277 00:15:23,631 --> 00:15:26,841 JUST MAKES ME FEEL SO MUCH BETTER, 278 00:15:27,009 --> 00:15:29,719 BECAUSE YOU'RE, LIKE, TOTALLY OVER IT, RIGHT? 279 00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:35,099 AND LATER THEY CAME INSIDE, AND THEY HAD, LIKE, 280 00:15:35,267 --> 00:15:40,063 THIS CHECKERBOARD PATTERN ALL OVER THEIR ARMS AND LEGS! 281 00:15:40,230 --> 00:15:43,691 AND MY DAD LAUGHED AND SAID THEY FELL ASLEEP 282 00:15:43,859 --> 00:15:48,237 ON THE HAMMOCK, BUT I KNEW IT WAS A LIE. 283 00:15:49,531 --> 00:15:52,283 I KNEW WHAT HE DID TO MY MOM. 284 00:15:58,165 --> 00:16:00,583 YOUR MOM. 285 00:16:04,380 --> 00:16:05,797 OKAY, I'M READY TO FOOL AROUND. 286 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:07,924 PLEASE TAKE ME HOME. 287 00:16:17,309 --> 00:16:20,269 OH HEY, LOOK, JACKIE. IT'S MY FRIENDS, 288 00:16:20,437 --> 00:16:23,064 ERIC, DONNA, AND FEZ. 289 00:16:24,149 --> 00:16:26,859 YEP, THAT'S ALL MY FRIENDS. 290 00:16:28,195 --> 00:16:29,835 KELSO, IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY TO ME, 291 00:16:29,947 --> 00:16:31,322 WHY DON'T YOU JUST SAY IT? 292 00:16:31,490 --> 00:16:35,743 OH, NO. 293 00:16:35,911 --> 00:16:38,538 I THINK YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY TO ME, 294 00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:40,248 AND I'M GOING TO BE RIGHT OVER HERE 295 00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:42,750 WHEN YOU'RE READY. 296 00:16:48,298 --> 00:16:49,738 ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT! THIS IS STUPID. 297 00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,259 JUST APOLOGIZE ALREADY. 298 00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:53,011 FORMAN, ITS NOT MY FAULT. 299 00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:54,262 WHATEVER. HE THINKS IT IS. 300 00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:55,513 IT IS! 301 00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:57,932 YOU MADE ME FALL OFF THE WATER TOWER. 302 00:16:59,518 --> 00:17:02,020 HOW? DID I PUSH YOU? 303 00:17:02,187 --> 00:17:03,604 WELL, NO, BUT... 304 00:17:03,772 --> 00:17:06,691 DID I MAKE THE RAILING SLIPPERY? 305 00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:07,859 NO. 306 00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:09,569 THEN HOW IS IT MY FAULT? 307 00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:12,405 BECAUSE! 308 00:17:12,573 --> 00:17:15,533 YOU DIDN'T LIKE MY ARTWORK. 309 00:17:16,827 --> 00:17:20,913 AND YOU DON'T RESPECT ME AND YOU LAUGH AT ME 310 00:17:21,081 --> 00:17:25,918 AND YOU'RE INCONSIDERATE OF MY FEELINGS. 311 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:30,965 KELSO, NO OFFENSE, BUT YOU SOUND LIKE A CHICK. 312 00:17:32,926 --> 00:17:37,096 WELL... MAN, I DO! 313 00:17:39,099 --> 00:17:41,142 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 314 00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,770 DO YOU REMEMBER THAT TIME WHEN I WAS CLIMBING YOUR FENCE 315 00:17:43,937 --> 00:17:46,105 AND I HIT MY FOREHEAD ON THAT TREE BRANCH, 316 00:17:46,273 --> 00:17:48,191 AND I FELL INTO YOUR YARD AND YOUR DOG YOGI 317 00:17:48,358 --> 00:17:52,028 CAME OUT OF THE HOUSE AND BIT ME TWICE ON THE ASS? 318 00:17:57,242 --> 00:17:58,951 YEAH. 319 00:17:59,119 --> 00:18:01,662 YOU BLED AND YOU CRIED. 320 00:18:03,749 --> 00:18:05,583 I BLED. I DIDN'T CRY. 321 00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,794 YEAH, YOU DID. 322 00:18:07,961 --> 00:18:10,588 YOU BLED AND YOU CRIED. 323 00:18:10,756 --> 00:18:12,465 AND YOU LAUGHED, MAN, A LOT, 324 00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:15,218 WHILE I WAS BLEEDING. 325 00:18:15,385 --> 00:18:16,636 DO YOU SEE MY POINT? 326 00:18:16,804 --> 00:18:20,056 YEAH. IT'S FUNNY WHEN FRIENDS GET HURT. 327 00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:28,815 CLOSE ENOUGH. 328 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:31,192 SORRY. 329 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:33,903 HEY, STOP TALKING LIKE A CHICK. 330 00:18:35,489 --> 00:18:37,490 OH, OH. 331 00:18:37,658 --> 00:18:39,158 HA-HA-HA. 332 00:18:39,326 --> 00:18:42,245 GOD, YOU'RE BOTH IDIOTS! 333 00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:47,708 ERIC? 334 00:18:47,876 --> 00:18:49,127 YOUR FATHER AND I HAVE NOTICED 335 00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:51,921 THAT YOU'VE BEEN ACTING VERY STRANGE LATELY. 336 00:18:52,089 --> 00:18:56,175 LIKE A HIPPIE. 337 00:18:56,343 --> 00:18:58,594 IS THERE SOMETHING YOU WANT TO TELL US? 338 00:18:58,762 --> 00:19:01,681 ARE YOU ON DOPE? ARE YOU? 339 00:19:01,849 --> 00:19:04,225 BECAUSE WE CAN HELP GET YOU CLEAN. 340 00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:06,477 THERE'S COUNSELING, HOSPITALIZATION... 341 00:19:06,645 --> 00:19:09,647 MY FOOT KICKING YOUR ASS. 342 00:19:15,028 --> 00:19:17,655 MOM, DAD, I'M NOT ON DRUGS. 343 00:19:17,823 --> 00:19:20,158 OH, WHAT A RELIEF. YOU HAVE NO IDEA... 344 00:19:20,325 --> 00:19:23,327 KITTY, KITTY, HE'S LYING. 345 00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:26,914 THAT'S WHAT THE HOP-HEADS DO. 346 00:19:27,082 --> 00:19:29,250 MOM, DAD, I SWEAR, I'M NOT ON DRUGS. 347 00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:32,253 WELL, THEN, WHAT THE HELL'S WRONG WITH YOU? 348 00:19:34,590 --> 00:19:36,299 WELL, I ACCIDENTALLY S... 349 00:19:36,466 --> 00:19:39,010 I WAS UPSTAIRS, AND I... I... 350 00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,637 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M ON DRUGS. 351 00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:51,439 OH, FOR GOD'S SAKE! HE SAW YOU GUYS DOING IT! 352 00:19:52,441 --> 00:19:54,150 THERE. 353 00:19:55,736 --> 00:19:57,862 I HELPED! 354 00:20:00,157 --> 00:20:01,908 OH, HONEY. 355 00:20:02,075 --> 00:20:04,327 WERE YOUR FATHER AND I HAVING INTERCOURSE? 356 00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:07,288 MOM! 357 00:20:08,707 --> 00:20:11,375 WELL, NO WONDER YOU'VE BEEN ACTING SO WEIRD. 358 00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:14,003 RED, SAY SOMETHING. MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER. 359 00:20:15,589 --> 00:20:17,715 UM... 360 00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:21,761 [CLEARING THROAT] IT'S MORE FUN THAN IT LOOKS. 361 00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:31,270 RED. 362 00:20:31,438 --> 00:20:32,438 WHAT? 363 00:20:32,522 --> 00:20:34,357 WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY? 364 00:20:34,524 --> 00:20:35,900 YOU KNOW WHAT? 365 00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:43,741 UM, YOU GUYS DO IT, AND, UM, I'M OKAY WITH THAT. 366 00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:45,910 SO... 367 00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:48,204 THANKS. 368 00:20:49,414 --> 00:20:51,540 SURE THING. 369 00:20:53,418 --> 00:20:54,961 [CLEARS THROAT] I JUST HOPE YOU LEARNED YOUR LESSON. 370 00:20:55,128 --> 00:20:57,755 OH. 371 00:20:57,923 --> 00:21:01,425 YES SIR, I DID. 372 00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:05,638 WAIT A SECOND. WHAT LESSON? 373 00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:06,931 ALWAYS KNOCK. 374 00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:08,307 OH. 375 00:21:08,475 --> 00:21:09,558 OH! 376 00:21:09,726 --> 00:21:10,977 OH, EVEN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE AFTERNOON. 377 00:21:11,144 --> 00:21:13,521 OH MY GOD! 378 00:21:20,445 --> 00:21:21,779 MAN, THAT WAS FUNNY. 379 00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:23,781 HA-HA-HA-HA. 380 00:21:23,949 --> 00:21:26,117 I DON'T... I DON'T KNOW HOW FUNNY IT IS. 381 00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:29,578 WHAT IF THAT HAD BEEN YOU WALKING IN OUR YOUR PARENTS? 382 00:21:34,918 --> 00:21:37,837 AND YOUR MOTHER WAS A DANCER. 383 00:21:38,005 --> 00:21:41,465 I IMAGINE THAT WOULD'VE BEEN QUITE SOMETHING. 384 00:21:41,633 --> 00:21:43,718 QUIT IT, KITTY. 385 00:21:43,885 --> 00:21:44,969 OH. 386 00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:46,762 HEY, DON'T. 387 00:21:49,725 --> 00:21:51,934 COME ON NOW. STOP THAT. 388 00:21:52,102 --> 00:21:54,854 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY CARSEY-WARNER AND FOX BROADCASTING 389 00:21:57,691 --> 00:21:59,483 BOY, KELSO'S GOING TO BE SO HAPPY 390 00:21:59,651 --> 00:22:01,777 THAT I FINISHED HIS GRAFFITI. 391 00:22:03,488 --> 00:22:04,989 OH, YES. 392 00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:07,283 I AM VERY TALENTED. 393 00:22:07,451 --> 00:22:09,535 AY... AY! 394 00:22:09,703 --> 00:22:11,329 [THUD] 395 00:22:11,496 --> 00:22:13,205 [CRASH] 396 00:22:13,373 --> 00:22:14,457 [THUD] 397 00:22:14,624 --> 00:22:15,833 OH, NO! 398 00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:18,836 I AM HURT... 399 00:22:19,004 --> 00:22:22,256 AND ALL ALONE... 400 00:22:22,424 --> 00:22:24,467 AND IT IS GIVING ME THE FINGER! 401 00:22:24,634 --> 00:22:26,218 CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE, INC. 402 00:22:26,386 --> 00:22:28,343 PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF CAPTIONS PROHIBITED WITHOUT 403 00:22:28,344 --> 00:22:30,066 PERMISSION OF NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE