1
00:00:06,480 --> 00:00:08,760
I think we have a really big
shoplifting problem.

2
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:11,440
I just did inventory, and
there are 30 records missing.

3
00:00:11,480 --> 00:00:14,040
Oh, Angie, I forgot to tell you,
I moved those to the annex,

4
00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:16,160
otherwise known
as my house.

5
00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:21,560
Excuse me,
Mr. Record store big shot,

6
00:00:21,600 --> 00:00:23,080
I need some help.

7
00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:28,720
Where can I find something
by Bette Midler?

8
00:00:29,480 --> 00:00:31,440
Well, we don't have
any Bette midler,

9
00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:34,240
but may I suggest
something even better?

10
00:00:34,360 --> 00:00:37,760
Perhaps a little
Sex Pistols.

11
00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:42,920
Sex pistols?
Well, that's terrible.

12
00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:45,440
Guns don't belong
in the bedroom.

13
00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:48,000
They agree,

14
00:00:48,040 --> 00:00:50,240
and a lot of their songs
are about just that,

15
00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:54,480
and they deliver their message
with a smooth, mellow sound.

16
00:00:55,360 --> 00:00:57,760
So it's like
easy listening.

17
00:00:58,760 --> 00:01:00,560
Well, they're
not hard to hear.

18
00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:03,200
Steven,

19
00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:05,520
the store is great.

20
00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:07,080
- I'm proud of you.
- Thank you.

21
00:01:07,120 --> 00:01:08,640
Whoa, Hyde,

22
00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:11,120
I want you to really
savor this moment.

23
00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:14,200
Red's only nice
every 75 years.

24
00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:18,320
Yeah. He's kind of like the
Halley's comet of compliments.

25
00:01:18,960 --> 00:01:22,440
I got one the first time
I used the potty and...

26
00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:24,640
Yeah, since
then, nothing.

27
00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:28,400
What am I supposed to do, compliment
you every time you go to the can?

28
00:01:28,440 --> 00:01:29,240
See?

29
00:01:30,320 --> 00:01:31,720
All these kids

30
00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:33,840
wasting their
money on records.

31
00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:37,640
You think they could be down
at my muffler shop buying mufflers.

32
00:01:38,560 --> 00:01:40,120
You're all stupid.

33
00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:45,760
If you want, I could plug your
store on my next radio show.

34
00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:48,400
That would be great, and tell
them I'm giving away calendars.

35
00:01:48,480 --> 00:01:51,320
Okay. Well, the only problem is I
don't know how many people will hear it.

36
00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:54,280
I used to think I had a lot of listeners
because I had a lot of call-ins,

37
00:01:54,320 --> 00:01:57,920
but it turns out it was just one
crazy guy doing different voices.

38
00:01:58,840 --> 00:02:00,640
You may know
him as fez.

39
00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:04,640
Fez, just tell me
your secret.

40
00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:05,480
Just kiss me.

41
00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:06,720
I'm not doing that.

42
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:08,280
Then I'm not telling
you my secret.

43
00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:10,200
- Just tell me.
- Just kiss me.

44
00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:16,480
Big news from the salon--
I just shampooed Marie,

45
00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:18,560
who waits tables
at the coffee shop.

46
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:20,320
Well, that
is big news.

47
00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:23,160
She served pie at
1 A.M. To kelso

48
00:02:23,200 --> 00:02:24,960
and Hyde's
sister Angie,

49
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,440
and Kelso took the pie and fed
it to Angie, and she liked it.

50
00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:31,520
Oh, my god.

51
00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:33,800
Oh, this isn't good. Steven
is gonna lose his mind.

52
00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:36,280
I can't believe Angie
went out with Kelso.

53
00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:37,040
What?

54
00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:38,880
Angie went out
with Kelso?

55
00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:43,040
What?

56
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,280
Don't you what me.
You know what you did.

57
00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:48,960
It was $10. I'll put
it back in the register.

58
00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:50,400
No,

59
00:02:50,840 --> 00:02:52,760
Not that. You went
out with Kelso.

60
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,520
Look, in my town,
there are two rules.

61
00:02:54,560 --> 00:02:57,720
One--don't date kelso.
Two--don't date kelso.

62
00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:01,040
Yeah, it even says that on the
sign when you drive into town.

63
00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:03,440
"Welcome to point place

64
00:03:03,760 --> 00:03:05,280
Don't date kelso."

65
00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:08,760
The high school band spells
that out during halftime.

66
00:03:09,880 --> 00:03:11,760
Look, I'm not
dating michael.

67
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:14,480
We went out one time, but
it's not gonna happen again.

68
00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:18,320
I need a guy who can eat a breadstick
without pretending it's a cigar first.

69
00:03:18,920 --> 00:03:20,960
Okay, the thing
is, Angie,

70
00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:23,240
Michael's like
chocolate cake,

71
00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,280
Okay? It looks
good in the bakery,

72
00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:26,680
but when you
take it home,

73
00:03:26,760 --> 00:03:28,640
it sleeps with all
your friends.

74
00:03:30,760 --> 00:03:31,760
Yeah.

75
00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:34,120
Hey, Donna, what
kind of food am I?

76
00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:35,200
Um...

77
00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:38,360
I don't know.
I guess a Twizzler.

78
00:03:42,120 --> 00:03:42,920
What?

79
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:44,120
No, it's a good thing.

80
00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:46,640
You can have a lot of
them and not even notice.

81
00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:49,840
You're gonna sit
there and take that?

82
00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:52,400
Of course you are.
You're a Twizzler.

83
00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:02,320
Are you closed yet or what? I've been
waiting in the parking lot forever.

84
00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:04,720
I didn't see
you out there.

85
00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:07,920
That's because I was hiding
in the bushes by your car.

86
00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:14,520
I figuRed when I jumped out, you'd be so relieved
it was me that you'd go out with me again.

87
00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:17,320
Why didn't you
just ask me out?

88
00:04:17,360 --> 00:04:19,080
I don't know.

89
00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:21,000
I was... ye...

90
00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:23,320
I was gonna,
but you're so

91
00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:26,120
pretty and
successful and...

92
00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:29,600
plus I kind of like
hiding in the bushes.

93
00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:32,200
Michael,

94
00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:34,000
I appreciate the offer,

95
00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:35,600
but I'm not sure
you're my type.

96
00:04:35,760 --> 00:04:37,040
Not your type?

97
00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:39,600
I'm like ketchup. I go
good on everything.

98
00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:43,640
Yeah, well,
thanks, anyways.

99
00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:48,960
Okay, all
right, look,

100
00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:49,920
Angie,

101
00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:52,200
I really wanna go
out with you again,

102
00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:56,480
Okay? And I got about 50 lines that
I could throw at you right now, but..

103
00:04:56,600 --> 00:05:00,400
I don't wanna do that because I don't want
you to go out with me because of some line.

104
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:02,880
I want you to go
out with me 'cause

105
00:05:03,840 --> 00:05:06,240
you like me as
much as I like you.

106
00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:08,960
Are you telling me
that's not a line?

107
00:05:09,760 --> 00:05:12,760
Well, it's not now, but if it
works, I can add it to the list.

108
00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:17,680
Okay, you
know what?

109
00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:20,440
Let's go get a drink,
but just one drink.

110
00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:28,320
Ready  for
that drink now?

111
00:06:03,860 --> 00:06:07,500
you know, I'm not sure
these sex pistols are for me.

112
00:06:08,980 --> 00:06:09,860
Look,

113
00:06:10,660 --> 00:06:13,460
this fella's name
is Johnny Rotten.

114
00:06:14,340 --> 00:06:17,060
You'd think he'd change
that for show business.

115
00:06:17,940 --> 00:06:19,220
Oh, Mrs. Foreman,

116
00:06:19,220 --> 00:06:21,900
okay, Steven just found out
Michael went out with his sister,

117
00:06:21,940 --> 00:06:24,420
So I need to think of something
to do to cheer him up.

118
00:06:24,620 --> 00:06:28,300
Well, I do know Steven loves peanut
butter chocolate chip cookies.

119
00:06:28,340 --> 00:06:29,700
So I go
buy those?

120
00:06:29,700 --> 00:06:31,460
No, Jackie,
you make them.

121
00:06:31,500 --> 00:06:33,300
So I hire someone
to make them?

122
00:06:33,620 --> 00:06:36,740
No. You have to make them
with your own two hands.

123
00:06:36,780 --> 00:06:38,500
I'll pay you $20
to make them.

124
00:06:39,420 --> 00:06:43,740
Only you can put in the love
that is the real secret ingRedient.

125
00:06:45,580 --> 00:06:46,740
$30.

126
00:06:47,580 --> 00:06:49,380
Will you two hens
stop clucking?

127
00:06:49,420 --> 00:06:51,100
Donna's back
on the radio.

128
00:06:51,220 --> 00:06:53,100
Okay, that was the
thursday rock block,

129
00:06:53,140 --> 00:06:55,820
and you're listening to the
new and improved Hot Donna,

130
00:06:55,860 --> 00:06:57,380
now with
hair like

131
00:06:57,380 --> 00:06:59,020
like strands
of gold.

132
00:07:00,180 --> 00:07:02,180
And if you're driving home
and things are a little loud,

133
00:07:02,220 --> 00:07:06,860
stop by the Forman and son muffler shop,
where they're also giving away calendars.

134
00:07:07,780 --> 00:07:09,300
She said Forman
on the radio.

135
00:07:10,140 --> 00:07:12,620
We're gonna have to
change our phone number.

136
00:07:15,700 --> 00:07:18,140
You know, that
Donna is a great girl.

137
00:07:18,180 --> 00:07:21,140
I can't believe that Eric
wouldn't marry her.

138
00:07:21,380 --> 00:07:22,940
When I get
back home,

139
00:07:23,260 --> 00:07:25,060
I'm gonna kick
him in the ass.

140
00:07:27,460 --> 00:07:32,380
And now "love you inside out" by the Bee Gees
going out to Jackie Burkhart from Steven Hyde...

141
00:07:32,420 --> 00:07:36,700
Oh, see now? Steven loves me and
wants everyone to know it.

142
00:07:36,740 --> 00:07:39,220
Requested by
jackie burkhart.

143
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:48,380
Okay, Fez, I'll play
you one more game,

144
00:07:48,420 --> 00:07:51,300
but just so you know,
this honk-honk is a foul.

145
00:07:51,820 --> 00:07:53,580
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, Angie.

146
00:07:53,620 --> 00:07:54,980
I need to talk to you
guys about something.

147
00:07:55,700 --> 00:07:57,940
Oh, god, you didn't go out
with Kelso again, did you?

148
00:07:57,980 --> 00:07:58,740
No.

149
00:07:58,780 --> 00:08:03,220
I was on my way to going out with him, but
then we got interrupted by me sleeping with him.

150
00:08:03,780 --> 00:08:04,540
What?

151
00:08:04,580 --> 00:08:06,940
Well, at least they didn't
go out. Wait a minute.

152
00:08:07,580 --> 00:08:08,980
I need some advice.

153
00:08:09,020 --> 00:08:12,020
My advice is go back in time
and don't sleep with Kelso.

154
00:08:12,660 --> 00:08:14,620
Yeah, but you need
a time machine.

155
00:08:14,900 --> 00:08:17,260
The only person
working on that is kelso.

156
00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:19,260
you have to
sleep with him,

157
00:08:19,300 --> 00:08:21,340
so you're kind of back
where you started.

158
00:08:21,860 --> 00:08:22,860
Here's the thing.

159
00:08:22,900 --> 00:08:26,460
I don't know if you guys
have noticed, but I'm kind of,

160
00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:28,340
- you know...
- bitchy?

161
00:08:31,540 --> 00:08:34,300
I was gonna say
uptight, but fine.

162
00:08:35,020 --> 00:08:37,060
I never relax
and laugh,

163
00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:39,140
and with Michael,
that's all we do,

164
00:08:39,260 --> 00:08:40,500
except for
the sex,

165
00:08:41,420 --> 00:08:44,660
although I did laugh,
you know, during.

166
00:08:46,420 --> 00:08:49,020
Actually, it was more
of a giggle of appreciation.

167
00:08:49,220 --> 00:08:50,060
Okay,

168
00:08:50,700 --> 00:08:53,100
I'm not sure you know what
you're getting yourself into--

169
00:08:53,180 --> 00:08:56,500
Kelso has a baby
with another woman.

170
00:08:56,900 --> 00:08:58,260
Yeah, he told me.

171
00:08:58,860 --> 00:08:59,700
Damn.

172
00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:03,620
I thought that would
run you off for sure.

173
00:09:03,700 --> 00:09:06,660
Let me try. I'm the master
of running girls off.

174
00:09:08,780 --> 00:09:10,620
You think he's
good in bed, huh?

175
00:09:11,180 --> 00:09:12,940
How do you think
he got that good?

176
00:09:13,820 --> 00:09:15,700
Practice, practice,

177
00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:17,300
practice...

178
00:09:18,220 --> 00:09:19,580
cheerleader,

179
00:09:19,820 --> 00:09:21,260
cheerleader...

180
00:09:22,100 --> 00:09:23,900
cheerleaders, mother.

181
00:09:26,180 --> 00:09:29,540
Hey, fez, check out
this nudie calendar.

182
00:09:30,020 --> 00:09:31,140
Uh-oh.

183
00:09:33,380 --> 00:09:35,300
Is this the calendar
Red's giving away?

184
00:09:38,060 --> 00:09:41,380
It's just pictures of half-naked
girls posing by cars.

185
00:09:42,180 --> 00:09:43,420
That's a disgrace.

186
00:09:45,420 --> 00:09:46,900
I'll dispose of that.

187
00:09:47,500 --> 00:09:49,140
No, I'll take it.

188
00:09:49,900 --> 00:09:52,020
We'll never
get it back now.

189
00:09:52,260 --> 00:09:54,460
It's going in the box with my
naked lady pen and my

190
00:09:54,500 --> 00:09:56,900
"I got crabs in louisiana" t-shirt.

191
00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:04,300
Thank you for helping me, Mrs. Forman.
Steven is gonna love these cookies.

192
00:10:04,340 --> 00:10:08,220
Okay, now start by cracking
a couple of eggs into the bowl.

193
00:10:11,860 --> 00:10:13,380
I can't touch an egg.

194
00:10:14,420 --> 00:10:15,500
Why not?

195
00:10:16,140 --> 00:10:18,220
'Cause it came out
of a chicken butt.

196
00:10:21,100 --> 00:10:23,100
Honey,  they wash it.

197
00:10:23,660 --> 00:10:27,020
Well, wash it all you want,
it still came out of a butt.

198
00:10:32,860 --> 00:10:35,660
All right, so I've been thinking
about Donna's Twizzler remark.

199
00:10:36,660 --> 00:10:37,940
Maybe it's
not so bad.

200
00:10:37,980 --> 00:10:39,860
I mean, yes, it
is candy, but,

201
00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:42,740
you know,you bite both
ends off, you got a straw.

202
00:10:45,220 --> 00:10:47,220
That's a metaphor
for versatility.

203
00:10:48,180 --> 00:10:51,940
No, I think it's a metaphor for you
being long, skinny, bendy and floppy.

204
00:10:56,940 --> 00:10:58,060
Hey, Hyde.

205
00:10:59,900 --> 00:11:01,340
Why are you smiling?

206
00:11:02,820 --> 00:11:04,100
I don't know.

207
00:11:06,820 --> 00:11:08,820
Talk to Angie today?

208
00:11:08,940 --> 00:11:09,860
No.

209
00:11:09,900 --> 00:11:11,260
Oh, yeah!

210
00:11:12,780 --> 00:11:16,420
I have officially nailed everyone
in this room's sister.

211
00:11:23,620 --> 00:11:24,380
Ow!

212
00:11:24,860 --> 00:11:25,580
That's...

213
00:11:25,980 --> 00:11:26,980
Ow...

214
00:11:28,100 --> 00:11:30,140
Hey, Hyde,
Kelso and Angie--

215
00:11:30,660 --> 00:11:32,340
oh, you already know.

216
00:11:33,780 --> 00:11:34,540
Hyde,

217
00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:39,540
Allow me to be the first to welcome you
to the "Kelso had sex with my sister" club.

218
00:11:40,460 --> 00:11:42,820
There's no handshake
or password.

219
00:11:43,140 --> 00:11:44,740
There's really
just shame.

220
00:11:45,700 --> 00:11:47,220
Damn it, Kelso.

221
00:11:47,380 --> 00:11:49,860
My sister's been in town for a month.
You're already slept with her?

222
00:11:49,900 --> 00:11:51,820
This is why
I keep my sister

223
00:11:51,860 --> 00:11:54,420
10,000 miles away
in a jungle.

224
00:11:56,860 --> 00:12:00,460
Believe me, if things don't work out
with Angie, I'm on the next flight out.

225
00:12:04,460 --> 00:12:05,220
Hey,

226
00:12:05,460 --> 00:12:08,780
Hyde, remember how you kept bringing
it up when Kelso nailed my sister?

227
00:12:08,780 --> 00:12:11,460
I never understood
why, but now I get it.

228
00:12:11,900 --> 00:12:13,420
It's fun.

229
00:12:14,420 --> 00:12:15,340
So guess what?

230
00:12:15,380 --> 00:12:16,780
Kelso nailed
your sister.

231
00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:18,540
Oh, and another thing,

232
00:12:18,900 --> 00:12:20,420
Kelso nailed your sister.

233
00:12:21,660 --> 00:12:23,460
Shut up, you
little Twizzler.

234
00:12:24,580 --> 00:12:27,780
Stick and stones may break my
bones, but Kelso nailed your sister.

235
00:12:36,700 --> 00:12:37,700
Okay,

236
00:12:37,940 --> 00:12:40,060
I know you
can do this.

237
00:12:40,660 --> 00:12:44,020
An egg is not just something
that comes out of a butt.

238
00:12:44,900 --> 00:12:45,780
It's...

239
00:12:45,820 --> 00:12:49,140
it's a life source, it's
beautiful, so pick it up.

240
00:12:49,940 --> 00:12:51,700
Why don't you do it?
You're a nurse.

241
00:12:51,740 --> 00:12:53,940
You mess around with
butts all the time.

242
00:12:54,340 --> 00:12:57,540
Just pick up the friggin'
egg, you spoiled brat!

243
00:12:58,900 --> 00:12:59,820
Shh.

244
00:13:00,220 --> 00:13:03,460
Donna's back on the radio. Maybe
she'll mention my shop again.

245
00:13:03,500 --> 00:13:04,540
Okay,

246
00:13:04,740 --> 00:13:07,180
now it's time for a new
segment on my show...

247
00:13:07,220 --> 00:13:09,420
"what's on your
mind, Hot Donna?"

248
00:13:09,700 --> 00:13:13,860
When I agreed to promote the Forman and
Son calendar, I had no idea it was just pages

249
00:13:13,900 --> 00:13:17,100
of half-naked women
straddling drive shafts,

250
00:13:18,020 --> 00:13:18,980
Which

251
00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:21,980
is wrong, wrong, because
cars get very hot.

252
00:13:22,020 --> 00:13:26,220
So if they were to do these things,
they would easily burn their thighs.

253
00:13:27,380 --> 00:13:28,460
That's right,

254
00:13:28,460 --> 00:13:31,940
Forman and son mufflers is
promoting the burning of women.

255
00:13:32,580 --> 00:13:34,980
What is she talking about?

256
00:13:36,180 --> 00:13:37,940
Now I would
call for a boycott,

257
00:13:37,980 --> 00:13:39,860
but girls never go
down to these places.

258
00:13:39,860 --> 00:13:43,380
So I call for a
going-down-there-and-yelling-at-them...

259
00:13:44,460 --> 00:13:45,340
cott.

260
00:13:46,180 --> 00:13:47,100
Oh, great.

261
00:13:47,420 --> 00:13:52,220
Not I've gotta go back down to the shop before
those hairy-ass feminists tear the place down.

262
00:13:54,740 --> 00:13:59,220
Okay,now I would like to hear
from some pissed off feminists.

263
00:13:59,660 --> 00:14:01,420
You're on the air
with Hot Donna,

264
00:14:01,460 --> 00:14:04,660
or should I say
"hot under the collar" Donna?

265
00:14:05,300 --> 00:14:08,540
Donna Pinciotti, you should
be ashamed of yourself.

266
00:14:09,860 --> 00:14:12,060
Suddenly you think women
shouldn't be looked at?

267
00:14:12,100 --> 00:14:15,860
Well, I've seen your
outfits, miss lady tank top.

268
00:14:16,940 --> 00:14:17,780
Um,

269
00:14:18,460 --> 00:14:21,820
Mrs. Forman, this isn't
about me. It's about society.

270
00:14:22,460 --> 00:14:25,380
No, it's about Red, who's been like
a second father to you, and

271
00:14:25,420 --> 00:14:28,900
now finally he has something to be
proud of, and you're forcing your...

272
00:14:28,940 --> 00:14:31,580
weirdo hippie
politics on it.

273
00:14:32,900 --> 00:14:37,740
It's just a couple of greased-up
broads on a chevy. Get over it.

274
00:14:44,660 --> 00:14:48,580
Steven, I can't believe you
thought I'd like these Sex Pistols.

275
00:14:50,340 --> 00:14:54,900
I don't want anything this loud and crabby
in my house if I'm not married to it.

276
00:14:56,940 --> 00:14:59,460
I'm sorry, Mrs. Forman.
I'll make it up to you.

277
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:02,540
Have you ever heard of a
band called Judas Priest?

278
00:15:04,580 --> 00:15:07,020
Well, that's what judas
needed, a priest.

279
00:15:07,940 --> 00:15:09,660
Are they spiritual?

280
00:15:10,180 --> 00:15:12,500
I listen to them
every sunday.

281
00:15:14,980 --> 00:15:16,380
Hey, uh,

282
00:15:16,820 --> 00:15:19,540
Fez, you're the candy
expert in these parts.

283
00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:22,940
Okay, do you think
I'm a Twizzler?

284
00:15:23,900 --> 00:15:26,940
Well, you're no hershey's special
dark like your friend Fez.

285
00:15:28,780 --> 00:15:30,180
Okay, well,

286
00:15:30,220 --> 00:15:32,860
then how do I
untwizzle myself?

287
00:15:33,260 --> 00:15:37,020
Well,you need to become
richer, more chocolate.

288
00:15:38,380 --> 00:15:41,580
I don't know, just show Donna
who's boss. Take her like a man.

289
00:15:42,500 --> 00:15:44,940
No, I tried that
once in bed, but...

290
00:15:45,180 --> 00:15:47,500
all I got was a
sprained wrist.

291
00:15:48,300 --> 00:15:50,540
F.Y.I.--Advice
in "playboy"

292
00:15:50,540 --> 00:15:52,820
not always practical if you
can't overpower your woman.

293
00:15:53,300 --> 00:15:56,860
Oh, hey, Hyde, how's it going with the
store and Kelso nailing your sister?

294
00:15:59,020 --> 00:15:59,740
Steven,

295
00:16:00,820 --> 00:16:04,500
stop turning the Pat Boone
albums into Pat Boner albums.

296
00:16:05,140 --> 00:16:08,060
Okay,  you need to stop sleeping with
kelso, okay? It's embarrassing,

297
00:16:08,060 --> 00:16:10,700
and if you catch something,
we don't have medical.

298
00:16:11,860 --> 00:16:13,460
It's not embarrassing.

299
00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:16,100
He really likes me
and I really like him.

300
00:16:16,220 --> 00:16:17,860
You don't even know him.

301
00:16:17,900 --> 00:16:21,300
You do realize he has a really bad
track record with women, right?

302
00:16:21,780 --> 00:16:24,100
Look, I just don't
wanna see you get hurt.

303
00:16:24,660 --> 00:16:27,660
Oh, my god,
that's so sweet.

304
00:16:28,100 --> 00:16:29,980
I finally feel like
I have a brother.

305
00:16:31,060 --> 00:16:33,620
Oh, Hyde
has a sister...

306
00:16:35,420 --> 00:16:37,460
who got nailed
by Kelso.

307
00:16:43,740 --> 00:16:45,180
Mr. Forman,

308
00:16:46,060 --> 00:16:47,860
Mrs. Forman
really yelled at me,

309
00:16:48,780 --> 00:16:49,660
and

310
00:16:49,700 --> 00:16:52,980
I feel bad about what I said on
the radio and I'd like to apologize.

311
00:16:53,020 --> 00:16:54,220
Don't worry about it.

312
00:16:54,260 --> 00:16:58,100
People have been coming in nonstop
since you talked about the calendar.

313
00:16:59,820 --> 00:17:03,060
I cannot believe all the disgusting
perverts in this town...

314
00:17:04,700 --> 00:17:06,540
who listen
to my show.

315
00:17:07,420 --> 00:17:10,460
Hey, pervs,
I'm Hot Donna.

316
00:17:11,900 --> 00:17:12,700
Dad?

317
00:17:15,300 --> 00:17:16,980
You're with
the pervs?

318
00:17:17,820 --> 00:17:19,980
I'm just here
to support Red.

319
00:17:20,860 --> 00:17:22,260
I see that calendar.

320
00:17:22,740 --> 00:17:23,740
Put it down.

321
00:17:23,820 --> 00:17:26,380
No, I won't put it down.
You're the kid and I'm the dad,

322
00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:29,020
and I will have
my fantasy ladies.

323
00:17:30,420 --> 00:17:31,460
Fine, dad,

324
00:17:31,660 --> 00:17:33,340
but you won't
have my respect.

325
00:17:33,740 --> 00:17:36,140
One more woman
who doesn't respect me--

326
00:17:37,940 --> 00:17:40,500
that camel's back
broke long ago.

327
00:17:45,860 --> 00:17:47,540
Okay, this is
Hot Donna back...

328
00:17:47,580 --> 00:17:49,260
I'm a Twizzler?!

329
00:17:50,420 --> 00:17:52,020
I'm a Twizzler?!

330
00:17:52,700 --> 00:17:53,660
Unh-unh,

331
00:17:54,300 --> 00:17:55,620
I'm a man.

332
00:17:58,580 --> 00:18:00,500
Now you put
on "free bird"

333
00:18:00,900 --> 00:18:03,260
'cause we're gonna
do it for 13 minutes.

334
00:18:09,540 --> 00:18:10,380
Hey, Eric,

335
00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:13,300
what do you do when you have two pieces
of wood and want them to stick together?

336
00:18:13,340 --> 00:18:14,900
Oh, you
nail it.

337
00:18:16,740 --> 00:18:17,700
It's easy.

338
00:18:17,740 --> 00:18:20,700
It's kind of like how Kelso
nailed Hyde's sister.

339
00:18:22,620 --> 00:18:24,340
But I know if I can
find a piece of wood

340
00:18:24,380 --> 00:18:26,500
that's as slutty
as Hyde's sister.

341
00:18:29,180 --> 00:18:30,740
You guys have been
working on this a while?

342
00:18:30,740 --> 00:18:32,940
About as long as Kelso's
been working on your sister.

343
00:18:33,460 --> 00:18:37,380
Stop it, stop it. Everybody, stop it.
Steven, don't listen to them.

344
00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:39,780
Okay, I knew you were
having a hard time,

345
00:18:40,140 --> 00:18:41,820
so I baked you
these cookies.

346
00:18:42,140 --> 00:18:42,860
Oh.

347
00:18:44,380 --> 00:18:45,180
Ow.

348
00:18:46,660 --> 00:18:48,100
Are they no good?

349
00:18:48,780 --> 00:18:50,140
No, no, they're good.

350
00:18:51,500 --> 00:18:53,620
I'll just suck on them.

351
00:18:55,780 --> 00:18:56,900
Mmm...

352
00:18:58,620 --> 00:19:01,820
oh, forget it. I ruined them. They
didn't make you feel better at all.

353
00:19:01,860 --> 00:19:03,380
Oh, hey, Jackie,

354
00:19:03,380 --> 00:19:05,060
you know who
did feel better?

355
00:19:06,580 --> 00:19:08,660
Hyde's sister
after kelso nailed her.

356
00:19:09,300 --> 00:19:10,380
Give me those.

357
00:19:10,380 --> 00:19:11,300
Ow...

358
00:19:11,860 --> 00:19:12,540
Ow!

359
00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:20,060
Hey, Angie!

360
00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:25,860
After you close up, do you
wanna watch me eat a pizza?

361
00:19:28,900 --> 00:19:29,980
Look, Michael,

362
00:19:30,500 --> 00:19:32,460
I'm not sure we should
see each other again.

363
00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:35,860
A lot of people have told me you're not
very serious about the women you date,

364
00:19:36,220 --> 00:19:37,340
a lot of people...

365
00:19:38,100 --> 00:19:39,500
a lot, a lot...

366
00:19:41,660 --> 00:19:43,020
everybody.

367
00:19:44,540 --> 00:19:45,260
Okay,

368
00:19:45,740 --> 00:19:47,740
here's the thing
about those stories...

369
00:19:49,860 --> 00:19:51,020
they're all true.

370
00:19:53,700 --> 00:19:55,860
I've made a lot of
mistakes in my past,

371
00:19:55,900 --> 00:19:57,140
okay?

372
00:19:57,420 --> 00:20:00,500
And I could tell you
that I've changed, but

373
00:20:01,260 --> 00:20:02,860
I would rather
just show you.

374
00:20:03,020 --> 00:20:03,860
So

375
00:20:04,060 --> 00:20:06,140
why don't we
start off slow

376
00:20:06,380 --> 00:20:07,540
as friends?

377
00:20:12,020 --> 00:20:15,100
My other friends
do not let me do that.

378
00:20:17,260 --> 00:20:19,020
Just do me one favor.

379
00:20:19,180 --> 00:20:20,300
Anything.

380
00:20:21,060 --> 00:20:22,660
Just don't tell Hyde.

381
00:20:23,060 --> 00:20:25,020
Oh, I gotta
tell Hyde.

382
00:20:34,360 --> 00:20:36,840
Okay, I've got
my candles,

383
00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:38,840
I've got my bubbles...

384
00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:44,280
and I've got my
soothing, spiritual

385
00:20:44,360 --> 00:20:46,720
Judas Priest music.