1
00:00:05,131 --> 00:00:07,261
- Hey, guys.
- Mitch!
2
00:00:07,302 --> 00:00:09,265
I thought I heard
a matchbox car pull up.
3
00:00:11,060 --> 00:00:13,040
Yeah, I'm short, and
you're shaped like a lollipop.
4
00:00:13,064 --> 00:00:15,778
I'm not in the mood, Forman.
5
00:00:15,820 --> 00:00:18,301
My brother Jack's wedding is
tomorrow, and I don't have a date.
6
00:00:18,325 --> 00:00:21,372
Did you try Aly Richards?
She'll go anywhere there's cake.
7
00:00:22,458 --> 00:00:24,672
That's how I got
her into my car.
8
00:00:26,091 --> 00:00:28,263
But then I ate the cake,
and she left.
9
00:00:29,265 --> 00:00:31,144
I'm in a real bind here.
10
00:00:31,186 --> 00:00:32,705
I showed up
at the engagement party alone.
11
00:00:32,729 --> 00:00:34,818
My family made
so much fun of me.
12
00:00:34,860 --> 00:00:39,203
So I said to myself, 'cause,
of course, I was alone,
13
00:00:39,244 --> 00:00:42,667
that I would bring someone
sizzling hot with me to the wedding.
14
00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:45,380
Hey,
Donna, would you be my date?
15
00:00:45,422 --> 00:00:47,636
Mitch, I don't know what to say.
16
00:00:47,678 --> 00:00:49,682
Let me help you out. "No!"
17
00:00:52,604 --> 00:00:56,613
Donna, if you went with me, I might
finally earn some respect from my family.
18
00:00:56,655 --> 00:00:58,826
Let me say this for you
one more time in Spanish.
19
00:00:58,868 --> 00:01:00,120
No!
20
00:01:01,832 --> 00:01:03,419
I taught him that.
21
00:01:04,629 --> 00:01:07,511
Eric,
you know, it seems harmless.
22
00:01:07,553 --> 00:01:10,851
No, Donna,
I'm sorry, but I forbid it.
23
00:01:11,686 --> 00:01:13,399
Oh!
24
00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,236
Mitch, I'd love to go.
25
00:01:16,113 --> 00:01:17,365
- Donna, what the hell?
- No.
26
00:01:17,407 --> 00:01:19,870
I forbid you to ask me
questions about this.
27
00:01:19,912 --> 00:01:21,582
But, Donna...
28
00:01:21,624 --> 00:01:24,027
Let me tell you one more time in
Spanish...
29
00:01:26,508 --> 00:01:28,555
Hey, Donna, thanks so
much for doing this.
30
00:01:28,597 --> 00:01:31,144
Sure,
but, you know, just friends.
31
00:01:31,186 --> 00:01:35,111
You don't get to touch
any of this juicy stuff.
32
00:01:35,153 --> 00:01:38,534
No, don't worry. I'll even ask
another couple to be, like, chaperones.
33
00:01:38,576 --> 00:01:41,207
Hey, Jackie,
do you and Hyde want to go?
34
00:01:41,249 --> 00:01:44,422
I'm in, but I can't ask Steven.
35
00:01:44,464 --> 00:01:48,138
I'm still on probation for tricking
him into a ballroom dancing class.
36
00:01:48,180 --> 00:01:51,520
I'll go with you, Jackie, but I
warn you, don't drink too much.
37
00:01:53,441 --> 00:01:54,986
I will take advantage.
38
00:01:59,996 --> 00:02:01,708
♪ Hanging out
39
00:02:03,586 --> 00:02:05,549
♪ Down the street
40
00:02:07,178 --> 00:02:09,140
♪ The same old thing
41
00:02:10,768 --> 00:02:12,564
♪ We did last week
42
00:02:14,068 --> 00:02:18,076
♪ Not a thing to do
43
00:02:18,117 --> 00:02:21,290
♪ But talk to you
44
00:02:22,042 --> 00:02:23,795
♪ We're all all right
45
00:02:23,837 --> 00:02:25,632
♪ We're all all right ♪
46
00:02:26,343 --> 00:02:28,264
Hello, Wisconsin!
47
00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:41,374
Ah! I can't believe you
finally sprung for cable TV.
48
00:02:41,417 --> 00:02:45,883
Wasn't it you who said, "I'd rather
kiss Ho Chi Minh than pay for TV"?
49
00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:51,037
Well, your mother and I are
running out of things to talk about,
50
00:02:51,061 --> 00:02:55,695
so I thought the extra 20
channels might help fill in the gaps.
51
00:02:57,825 --> 00:03:01,501
Wait a second. Cable guy left?
He forgot to hook up the basement.
52
00:03:01,542 --> 00:03:03,128
No, he didn't so much forget,
53
00:03:03,170 --> 00:03:06,760
as follow my "don't hook up
the basement" instructions.
54
00:03:06,802 --> 00:03:08,890
But, Red, for
an extra two bucks a month,
55
00:03:08,932 --> 00:03:11,687
your wife and children could
be enjoying full-frontal nudity.
56
00:03:13,900 --> 00:03:16,532
But I don't want
you to enjoy anything.
57
00:03:17,909 --> 00:03:20,706
I want people your
age out of my house.
58
00:03:22,961 --> 00:03:24,774
Hey, I'm only here
'cause you had a heart attack.
59
00:03:24,798 --> 00:03:27,720
I only had a heart attack
because you're here.
60
00:03:33,149 --> 00:03:36,198
I'm sorry, Michael, but I'm
gonna have to search that bag.
61
00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:41,208
Every time you leave my house with a
backpack, I have to buy new hair spray.
62
00:03:41,250 --> 00:03:43,963
I didn't take anything.
This is lunch.
63
00:03:44,005 --> 00:03:45,927
I planned a whole romantic day
for me and Brooke.
64
00:03:45,967 --> 00:03:47,846
So where are you
and Brooke headed?
65
00:03:47,888 --> 00:03:49,935
Well, since she's having a baby,
66
00:03:49,976 --> 00:03:53,191
I thought I'd take her to a
place that kids and girls like,
67
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:56,155
so I figured I'd start the date
off at an amusement park,
68
00:03:56,197 --> 00:03:58,034
and we'd go on a ride
on the Lightning Whip.
69
00:04:01,459 --> 00:04:04,381
And then I'm gonna take her
horseback riding up to this overlook,
70
00:04:04,423 --> 00:04:08,724
and then we're gonna get cozy
and drink a little bingo-bango.
71
00:04:10,979 --> 00:04:14,737
Oh, sweetie, you're so wrong
it makes me want to cry a little.
72
00:04:14,779 --> 00:04:17,993
No, look, pregnant women
cannot go on roller coasters,
73
00:04:18,034 --> 00:04:21,876
and they definitely can't drink alcohol,
or bad things can happen to the baby.
74
00:04:21,918 --> 00:04:23,589
Case in point, Eric.
75
00:04:24,966 --> 00:04:27,305
Well, we didn't know
any better back then.
76
00:04:29,016 --> 00:04:31,188
I'm teaching a baby-care class
at the hospital.
77
00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:34,110
If you brought Brooke, I
think she'd be very impressed.
78
00:04:34,152 --> 00:04:36,658
All right. Yeah, sign us up.
79
00:04:36,700 --> 00:04:39,013
You know, there was a time
that all I had to do to impress a girl
80
00:04:39,037 --> 00:04:41,167
was turn my eyelids inside out.
81
00:04:42,336 --> 00:04:44,842
This baby's
changing everything. Oh!
82
00:04:57,577 --> 00:04:59,789
Thanks again for
doing this, Donna.
83
00:04:59,831 --> 00:05:03,004
Grandpa saw me walk in with
you, and he slipped me a 20.
84
00:05:04,759 --> 00:05:08,349
- Here, you should have this.
- See, that kind of
makes me a hooker.
85
00:05:13,985 --> 00:05:16,240
Well, hello.
86
00:05:16,282 --> 00:05:20,541
Looks like we're
sharing a table here.
87
00:05:20,583 --> 00:05:24,048
Here's your drink, here's your
bread, and here's your new lover.
88
00:05:26,971 --> 00:05:27,973
You wish.
89
00:05:30,270 --> 00:05:32,023
I'm sitting next to a goddess.
90
00:05:33,568 --> 00:05:37,200
I know. Didn't my hair
come out great tonight?
91
00:05:37,242 --> 00:05:41,877
Not you, shorty.
Her. I need your help.
92
00:05:41,919 --> 00:05:45,008
This is so easy, Fez.
She's like me.
93
00:05:45,050 --> 00:05:47,723
She's a country club girl,
and we're bitches.
94
00:05:49,100 --> 00:05:51,815
We only understand
one thing, money.
95
00:05:53,401 --> 00:05:55,572
- How much should I give her?
- No.
96
00:05:56,701 --> 00:06:00,248
Fez, act rich.
97
00:06:00,290 --> 00:06:02,796
Good evening, ladies and
gentlemen. My name is Eric.
98
00:06:02,838 --> 00:06:05,176
Eric, what are you doing here?
99
00:06:05,218 --> 00:06:06,972
I changed my work schedule
100
00:06:07,014 --> 00:06:10,855
so I could make sure that Mitch keeps
his tiny little doll hands to himself.
101
00:06:11,940 --> 00:06:14,029
Eric,
Mitch is not a threat to you.
102
00:06:14,069 --> 00:06:18,621
Okay, he's a perfectly harmless guy who
happens to worship the ground I walk on.
103
00:06:18,663 --> 00:06:21,669
You know, it's not his
fault that I'm eye candy.
104
00:06:23,464 --> 00:06:26,470
Well, relax. Don't worry.
Everything will be fine.
105
00:06:27,639 --> 00:06:29,937
Welcome to
the Holiday Hotel ballroom.
106
00:06:29,978 --> 00:06:32,442
I'll be your
waiter this evening.
107
00:06:32,483 --> 00:06:36,742
But unlike a normal waiter, I
despise and may try to destroy you.
108
00:06:39,081 --> 00:06:41,461
Waiter, I'm rich.
109
00:06:44,675 --> 00:06:47,723
And as a rich man, I have
much more money than you.
110
00:06:49,393 --> 00:06:51,941
Fez, I'm really not in the mood.
111
00:06:51,983 --> 00:06:54,237
Hey, sometimes I'm not in
the mood to count all my money,
112
00:06:54,279 --> 00:06:56,784
but I do it anyways
because I am a fat cat.
113
00:06:58,203 --> 00:07:01,419
Yeah, well, your bow tie
is starting to unclip, fat cat.
114
00:07:03,507 --> 00:07:04,884
Unbelievable.
115
00:07:04,926 --> 00:07:07,808
They come to this country,
we give them a job...
116
00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:12,191
They're just so ungrateful.
117
00:07:13,611 --> 00:07:15,949
I'm Christy. And you are?
118
00:07:17,243 --> 00:07:18,245
Ferrari.
119
00:07:20,751 --> 00:07:22,212
Fez Ferrari.
120
00:07:31,439 --> 00:07:34,488
This charity car wash
was a great idea, girls.
121
00:07:34,530 --> 00:07:36,325
Let's take our shirts off!
122
00:07:38,873 --> 00:07:40,752
Who changed my channel?
123
00:07:43,424 --> 00:07:44,885
What the...
124
00:07:52,316 --> 00:07:53,653
Steven!
125
00:07:57,286 --> 00:08:00,333
What the hell's
the matter with you?
126
00:08:00,375 --> 00:08:02,631
Stealing my cable!
127
00:08:02,672 --> 00:08:06,513
Red, before you blow your stack, why don't
you take a look at that car wash girl?
128
00:08:09,561 --> 00:08:11,315
She is so sudsy.
129
00:08:13,444 --> 00:08:17,245
You drilled a hole in my floor.
130
00:08:20,126 --> 00:08:23,340
My foot is about to
drill a hole in your ass!
131
00:08:25,762 --> 00:08:31,191
But, Red, the car wash girls
have to make $500
132
00:08:31,232 --> 00:08:36,075
or their super-freaky love nest is
gonna be turned into a bookstore.
133
00:08:36,117 --> 00:08:39,666
Look, there's only one
clicker, and that's upstairs.
134
00:08:39,708 --> 00:08:41,963
My cable, my channel.
135
00:08:48,017 --> 00:08:49,979
Stop spraying me, silly,
136
00:08:50,022 --> 00:08:52,903
or I'm gonna have to come over
there and kiss you.
137
00:08:52,944 --> 00:08:55,407
Tasha, you want a kiss, too?
138
00:08:55,448 --> 00:08:57,954
Wow, Tasha,
you have the biggest...
139
00:08:57,996 --> 00:08:59,559
...thunderstorms, which will result
140
00:08:59,583 --> 00:09:00,793
in a small-craft advisory...
141
00:09:00,835 --> 00:09:02,589
No, no!
142
00:09:08,685 --> 00:09:10,480
Man, look at all these preggos.
143
00:09:12,568 --> 00:09:15,241
God, that one's walking
like a gigantic duck.
144
00:09:15,283 --> 00:09:19,875
She's definitely in her third
trimester. The baby probably dropped.
145
00:09:19,917 --> 00:09:23,007
No, I think it's still in there.
146
00:09:23,049 --> 00:09:26,598
It means the baby's gotten
itself into the birthing position.
147
00:09:26,640 --> 00:09:28,436
Man, you really know stuff.
148
00:09:28,477 --> 00:09:30,982
I've read every baby
book in the library.
149
00:09:31,023 --> 00:09:33,905
By the way, did you ever read
that book I gave you by Dr. Spock?
150
00:09:33,947 --> 00:09:38,205
No, I kind of lost interest when I
realized it wasn't about Star Trek.
151
00:09:38,247 --> 00:09:41,671
Well, you signed us up for this
class, and that was very thoughtful.
152
00:09:41,712 --> 00:09:44,302
Well, that's me.
I'm Mr. Thoughtful.
153
00:09:45,471 --> 00:09:47,600
Man,
how many kids are you having?
154
00:09:49,604 --> 00:09:51,065
Oh, hi, Michael.
155
00:09:51,108 --> 00:09:53,612
Hope you're ready to talk
boo-boos, burps and binkies.
156
00:09:53,654 --> 00:09:55,868
Yeah, Brooke, this is Mrs.
Forman,
157
00:09:55,909 --> 00:09:58,623
the lady that told me I shouldn't
take you horseback riding.
158
00:09:58,665 --> 00:10:02,340
And, Mrs. Forman, this is Brooke,
the hot librarian I impregnated.
159
00:10:03,425 --> 00:10:05,679
Well, I am so
happy you two are here.
160
00:10:05,722 --> 00:10:08,644
And you should be happy, because
you have me as your tour guide
161
00:10:08,686 --> 00:10:14,448
as you make
the transition to parenthood.
162
00:10:17,705 --> 00:10:19,918
Michael.
163
00:10:19,959 --> 00:10:23,968
But that could have been
anybody. Everybody knows I rule.
164
00:10:24,010 --> 00:10:27,475
Okay, all right, okay.
Let's get started.
165
00:10:27,517 --> 00:10:31,149
Now, when you first bring
your little bundles of joy home,
166
00:10:31,191 --> 00:10:34,615
they will spend almost 20
hours a day sleeping and pooping.
167
00:10:35,658 --> 00:10:37,455
Yeah, that's the life, huh?
168
00:10:40,127 --> 00:10:44,595
Now who can tell me what they will
do with the rest of their cute little time?
169
00:10:44,636 --> 00:10:46,891
- Yes, Brooke.
- They'll be eating.
170
00:10:46,933 --> 00:10:50,148
Very good.
And what will they be eating?
171
00:10:50,189 --> 00:10:53,614
Hey, when you're not looking, I'm
gonna sneak the little guy some popcorn.
172
00:10:53,655 --> 00:10:57,663
Michael, babies can't eat
popcorn. They don't even have teeth.
173
00:10:57,704 --> 00:10:59,059
My Grandma Bessie
doesn't have any teeth,
174
00:10:59,083 --> 00:11:02,591
and trust me, she ain't shy
around a bucket of popcorn.
175
00:11:07,935 --> 00:11:12,235
Well, Christy says money's great, but
she wants to get to know the real me,
176
00:11:12,277 --> 00:11:15,075
and I really care about her.
177
00:11:15,117 --> 00:11:17,704
So what's another
fake good quality
178
00:11:19,501 --> 00:11:22,131
I could pretend to have
to trick her into the sack?
179
00:11:24,512 --> 00:11:28,687
Okay, okay, well, she's wearing fur,
which means she must love animals,
180
00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:32,987
which means she must
like sensitive guys.
181
00:11:33,864 --> 00:11:35,368
Sensitive, huh?
182
00:11:36,161 --> 00:11:37,330
You're good.
183
00:11:38,499 --> 00:11:40,461
Hey, cutie. Where you been?
184
00:11:40,503 --> 00:11:42,358
Who the hell do you think
you are, talking to me like that?
185
00:11:42,382 --> 00:11:43,759
- I'm sensitive.
- Fez!
186
00:11:46,891 --> 00:11:50,734
I guess it's a tradition for the
best man to say a few words.
187
00:11:50,774 --> 00:11:54,617
And all I really want to say
is that my brother
188
00:11:54,658 --> 00:11:59,793
is not the only one fortunate enough
to find himself in love's warm embrace.
189
00:11:59,835 --> 00:12:03,050
So, everybody, I'd like to introduce
you to Donna, my new fiancee.
190
00:12:06,266 --> 00:12:10,232
Or, as I like to call her, my big,
red love machine. That's her.
191
00:12:19,418 --> 00:12:21,088
Mitch, what the hell
are you doing?
192
00:12:21,130 --> 00:12:23,469
Ooh, look at that fireball go.
193
00:12:25,054 --> 00:12:27,393
Feisty at the table,
feisty in the bedroom.
194
00:12:28,145 --> 00:12:29,898
No. No.
195
00:12:29,940 --> 00:12:34,324
She's feisty in my bedroom,
people, my bedroom.
196
00:12:34,366 --> 00:12:38,249
Okay, he's just some lying, crazy
lunatic. He's crazy. This guy's crazy.
197
00:12:42,090 --> 00:12:45,305
And my congratulations
to the happy couple.
198
00:12:48,813 --> 00:12:52,822
This is the best wedding
I have ever been to.
199
00:12:52,864 --> 00:12:57,498
Falling barometric
pressure from a cold front out of Canada.
200
00:12:57,540 --> 00:12:59,918
Look at all that
hail in Buffalo.
201
00:13:02,132 --> 00:13:05,138
How can you watch this?
202
00:13:05,180 --> 00:13:10,024
It comforts me to know that there are
people out there more miserable than me,
203
00:13:10,066 --> 00:13:12,946
like those people
in Buffalo, and you.
204
00:13:16,287 --> 00:13:19,252
You have to sit here?
Why don't you go read a book?
205
00:13:20,170 --> 00:13:22,174
Why don't you go read a book?
206
00:13:23,009 --> 00:13:25,013
Because I have cable.
207
00:13:29,105 --> 00:13:31,527
Very nice.
208
00:13:31,569 --> 00:13:33,866
Baby says, "It's tight,
but not too tight,
209
00:13:33,908 --> 00:13:36,956
"and I wuv the way you
powdered my wittle bottom."
210
00:13:39,294 --> 00:13:42,801
I never thought I'd say this, but
you gotta take it easy on the nads.
211
00:13:42,844 --> 00:13:47,185
I know what I'm doing. It's just, it
sounded so much easier in the books.
212
00:13:47,226 --> 00:13:50,776
- Okay, there.
- Let's have a look.
213
00:13:50,818 --> 00:13:54,408
Uh-oh! Baby says, "That's too loose.
Now I'm gonna wee-wee on Daddy."
214
00:13:56,664 --> 00:13:59,084
I just have to
redo the safety pin.
215
00:13:59,126 --> 00:14:01,507
- God, why can't I do this?
- Oh, no.
216
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:03,803
Baby says, "Ouch, you
poked me. Now I'm gonna cry."
217
00:14:07,268 --> 00:14:08,689
That's it. I give up.
218
00:14:08,731 --> 00:14:10,065
"Oh, Mommy, don't leave me.
219
00:14:10,107 --> 00:14:12,154
"I don't want to end up
in state-run foster care."
220
00:14:17,415 --> 00:14:19,503
You know, you seem normal
around your family,
221
00:14:19,545 --> 00:14:22,092
but out in the world,
you're a little nuts.
222
00:14:26,183 --> 00:14:29,900
So it turns out I
was right about Mitch.
223
00:14:31,319 --> 00:14:34,492
So let's see, that's you, wrong.
224
00:14:35,829 --> 00:14:38,668
Me, right.
225
00:14:39,921 --> 00:14:41,340
You don't have to rub it in.
226
00:14:41,382 --> 00:14:45,809
I think I do, Donna.
So rub-a-dub-dub, I'm right.
227
00:14:49,356 --> 00:14:52,363
I am humiliated!
228
00:14:52,405 --> 00:14:55,745
The only way I'm gonna get
my pride back is to kick your ass!
229
00:14:56,915 --> 00:14:59,210
So I'm
challenging you to a fight.
230
00:14:59,252 --> 00:15:01,214
That is,
unless you're too chicken.
231
00:15:02,927 --> 00:15:05,432
What is this, third grade?
232
00:15:05,474 --> 00:15:07,103
Okay, here's what I just heard.
233
00:15:11,277 --> 00:15:12,614
"Third grade."
234
00:15:15,829 --> 00:15:18,919
- Okay,
you can stop doing that.
- I can stop doing that...
235
00:15:18,961 --> 00:15:20,691
Okay, fine. You know what?
I'll fight you. Fine.
236
00:15:20,715 --> 00:15:24,013
Good. Tomorrow, 5:15,
the playground, you be there!
237
00:15:27,562 --> 00:15:30,610
- Why not just do it at 5:00?
- I have swimming lessons!
238
00:15:39,212 --> 00:15:41,633
Thank you so much
for helping me with Christy.
239
00:15:41,675 --> 00:15:45,141
She was telling me what
she did last summer at camp,
240
00:15:45,183 --> 00:15:46,727
and I think she
might be a whore.
241
00:15:49,776 --> 00:15:53,867
- So if there's
anything I can do for you...
- Actually, Fez, there is.
242
00:15:53,909 --> 00:15:56,372
When the bride tosses the
bouquet, I really want to catch it.
243
00:15:56,414 --> 00:15:58,795
It's such a sweet
and magical moment,
244
00:15:58,836 --> 00:16:02,761
so I need you to knock some
of those fat sluts out of my way.
245
00:16:02,803 --> 00:16:05,015
I will make
those Weebles wobble,
246
00:16:06,602 --> 00:16:08,314
and they will fall down.
247
00:16:10,820 --> 00:16:17,333
Fez Ferrari, you're so rich and sensitive,
I think I might go all the way with you.
248
00:16:19,212 --> 00:16:23,345
But only if you get everyone out of
my way so I can catch the bouquet.
249
00:16:24,515 --> 00:16:26,686
How many bouquets do they throw?
250
00:16:27,646 --> 00:16:28,731
One.
251
00:16:35,162 --> 00:16:39,379
Let's see, who do I help?
Old friend, new whore?
252
00:16:40,799 --> 00:16:42,426
Old friend, new whore?
253
00:16:59,588 --> 00:17:02,427
What am I saying?
Do the right thing, Fez.
254
00:17:21,342 --> 00:17:25,434
Okay, I don't know who gave you a
tattoo, but that is not good parenting.
255
00:17:27,605 --> 00:17:30,069
Look, Michael,
I don't want to talk about it.
256
00:17:30,111 --> 00:17:31,488
I thought I was ready,
257
00:17:31,529 --> 00:17:33,343
but today I found out I don't
even know how to use a diaper.
258
00:17:33,367 --> 00:17:36,373
We are gonna be covered in poo.
259
00:17:36,416 --> 00:17:40,048
Look, I think you're underestimating
us, all right? Especially me.
260
00:17:40,090 --> 00:17:42,511
Now, these beautiful hands
aren't just made for foreplay.
261
00:17:43,472 --> 00:17:46,186
Check it out.
262
00:17:46,227 --> 00:17:49,567
I remember the first time I
baby-sat for my little brother,
263
00:17:49,609 --> 00:17:52,908
and he power-dooked
all over himself, right?
264
00:17:52,950 --> 00:17:56,374
So I got my mom's salad tongs
and pulled off his pants,
265
00:17:56,415 --> 00:18:00,341
and then I grabbed him by the ankles
and took him outside and hosed him off.
266
00:18:00,383 --> 00:18:02,303
And voila.
267
00:18:02,345 --> 00:18:05,226
Oh, Michael, it's so perfect.
268
00:18:05,267 --> 00:18:09,943
See, you got the brains and the maternal
instincts, and I know how to wrap ass.
269
00:18:09,985 --> 00:18:13,326
We're gonna do this together,
and we're gonna be fine.
270
00:18:14,704 --> 00:18:17,585
"Oh, Daddy,
that's just how I like it."
271
00:18:20,758 --> 00:18:22,803
You're really
starting to creep me out.
272
00:18:26,311 --> 00:18:28,775
Winds variable
out of the northeast,
273
00:18:28,816 --> 00:18:31,406
20 miles an hour
with gusts to 45.
274
00:18:40,341 --> 00:18:41,885
Weather kicks ass.
275
00:18:48,525 --> 00:18:53,368
Forman, I'm your bud, so
I'm rooting for you in this fight.
276
00:18:53,410 --> 00:18:57,126
But business is business, so
I got 50 bucks on the little guy.
277
00:18:58,754 --> 00:19:01,969
Well, I see the chicken
showed up for his beating.
278
00:19:02,011 --> 00:19:05,644
How can I be a chicken
if I showed up for the fight?
279
00:19:05,685 --> 00:19:07,898
You know, it's funny,
'cause what I just heard was...
280
00:19:07,940 --> 00:19:11,448
Chicken...
Fight...
281
00:19:14,997 --> 00:19:19,214
Eric, as someone that has been
punched a lot,
282
00:19:20,800 --> 00:19:22,262
I have some advice.
283
00:19:22,304 --> 00:19:25,602
Do not move to a new country
and try to fit in at high school.
284
00:19:27,314 --> 00:19:30,738
Hey, Forman, come back here
so we can go over the rules.
285
00:19:31,657 --> 00:19:33,661
Okay, Eric, one last thing.
286
00:19:33,703 --> 00:19:35,206
You know when
we're play fighting,
287
00:19:35,248 --> 00:19:37,753
and you grab my wrist,
and I go, "Ow! Ow! Ow!"?
288
00:19:37,794 --> 00:19:39,716
That doesn't really hurt.
289
00:19:40,967 --> 00:19:43,432
Okay? So, don't do that.
290
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:46,771
What? The Forman Death Grip?
291
00:19:49,778 --> 00:19:53,118
Man, I was really
counting on that.
292
00:19:53,159 --> 00:19:57,461
What are you doing here?
I don't want to fight you.
293
00:19:57,502 --> 00:20:00,884
I was just trying to act tough so
I can get my self-respect back.
294
00:20:00,926 --> 00:20:02,262
By threatening me?
295
00:20:03,222 --> 00:20:04,684
It's okay. It's okay.
296
00:20:04,726 --> 00:20:07,273
I've got a way out of this
that'll make us both look good.
297
00:20:07,315 --> 00:20:10,028
We'll tell everyone that we
worked it out like gentlemen,
298
00:20:10,070 --> 00:20:13,911
- and now we're
the best of friends.
- What? No.
299
00:20:13,953 --> 00:20:17,461
Mitch, look, Donna was really
nice to you, and you humiliated her.
300
00:20:17,503 --> 00:20:19,758
I can't let you
treat people like that.
301
00:20:20,300 --> 00:20:22,639
Today I'm...
302
00:20:22,681 --> 00:20:25,894
I'm standing up
for all humanity.
303
00:20:25,936 --> 00:20:30,781
Would you do it for a 1968 G.I.Joe Desert
Rat edition with the original mess kit?
304
00:20:31,991 --> 00:20:34,872
Please.
I have three of those.
305
00:20:36,835 --> 00:20:39,465
- The French version?
- G.I. Jacques.
306
00:20:41,887 --> 00:20:43,223
It does exist.
307
00:20:44,434 --> 00:20:45,770
We got a deal?
308
00:20:47,649 --> 00:20:50,906
Well, I'm afraid there's
not gonna be a fight here.
309
00:20:52,325 --> 00:20:56,626
Guys, we worked out our
differences, and basically,
310
00:20:58,129 --> 00:20:59,966
he's a really great guy.
311
00:21:02,388 --> 00:21:04,326
Donna, he's doing the chicken
thing behind me right now!
312
00:21:04,350 --> 00:21:06,606
Yeah. He's really good at it.
313
00:21:08,150 --> 00:21:10,112
That's not the only thing
I'm good at, cherry pie.
314
00:21:11,449 --> 00:21:13,494
All right, that's it.
You're dead.
315
00:21:14,915 --> 00:21:17,127
Start the car, Mom!
Start the car!
316
00:21:24,518 --> 00:21:26,079
...temperatures in the...
317
00:21:26,104 --> 00:21:29,111
Ooh, Mr. Handyman,
I'm so glad you're finally here.
318
00:21:29,153 --> 00:21:32,911
There are so many things
I need you to nail.
319
00:21:32,953 --> 00:21:35,373
Lucky for you
I have a big hammer.
320
00:21:37,210 --> 00:21:38,840
Red, you dirty man!
321
00:21:44,434 --> 00:21:45,604
Mrs. Forman!
322
00:21:47,148 --> 00:21:50,113
What are you watching?
323
00:21:50,155 --> 00:21:52,618
- Weather.
- Winds variable...
324
00:21:52,642 --> 00:21:54,645
http://hiqve.com/