1 00:00:04,440 --> 00:00:07,120 Okay. So, is everyone ready... 2 00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:09,760 for our big trip to the University of Wisconsin? 3 00:00:09,840 --> 00:00:13,680 Yeah, Donna and I have it all mapped out. She is going to buy a tight sweater... 4 00:00:13,720 --> 00:00:16,800 with a big, red "W" on it, and I am going to watch her wear it. 5 00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:19,000 (Laughs) 6 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:22,560 And then we're gonna buckle down. 7 00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:26,240 Oh, Steven, I put out some clean clothes for you to take on the trip. 8 00:00:26,320 --> 00:00:29,640 Uh, thanks, Mrs. Forman, but I'm not really the college type. 9 00:00:29,720 --> 00:00:31,560 I get my learnin' on the street. 10 00:00:31,640 --> 00:00:35,160 Steven, you're a smart kid. If you would only just apply yourself... 11 00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:39,120 - you could go to college too. - You don't trust me alone in the house, do you? 12 00:00:39,160 --> 00:00:41,280 See how smart you are? 13 00:00:41,360 --> 00:00:44,520 Well, I just can't believe my baby is... 14 00:00:44,600 --> 00:00:48,160 all grown up and... visiting college! 15 00:00:48,240 --> 00:00:50,800 I am so freakin' old! 16 00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:56,880 And menopause makes another unwelcome appearance at the dinner table. 17 00:00:56,920 --> 00:01:00,600 Oh, no, it's not unwelcome. It's- It's liberating. 18 00:01:00,680 --> 00:01:03,280 Now my emotions just spill out. 19 00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:07,080 Yeah, Mom. You're sweating all over your pork chop. 20 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:10,680 Hey! There's my favorite coed. 21 00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:13,200 - Hey, are you all packed for Visitors Weekend? - I can't go. 22 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:15,280 My dad's makin' me visit Marquette instead. 23 00:01:15,320 --> 00:01:17,400 He thinks it's a better school, 'cause it's private. 24 00:01:17,480 --> 00:01:19,560 Oh, and 'cause it sounds French. 25 00:01:20,920 --> 00:01:23,560 Well, you know what? 26 00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:25,680 We'll just go with you. I mean, if it's a better school... 27 00:01:25,760 --> 00:01:27,640 then I belong there too, right, Dad? 28 00:01:27,680 --> 00:01:30,160 No. 29 00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:34,240 State schools are cheap. That's where you belong. 30 00:01:34,320 --> 00:01:37,360 Well, what if, like, you took out a second mortgage on the house? 31 00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:40,200 (Both Laughing) 32 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:44,960 Not for you, dumb-ass. 33 00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:50,680 (Rock Group Singing) 34 00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:13,360 (Ends) 35 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:16,280 Hello, Wisconsin! 36 00:02:20,380 --> 00:02:24,180 (Sighs) I have a bad feeling about this weekend, Eric. 37 00:02:24,260 --> 00:02:27,220 Nothing good can come from us visiting different schools. 38 00:02:27,300 --> 00:02:29,620 Well, yeah, but there's an upside. 39 00:02:29,660 --> 00:02:31,580 Two days apart? I mean, when we get together... 40 00:02:31,660 --> 00:02:33,540 it's gonna be electric, baby! 41 00:02:36,060 --> 00:02:38,420 Like a thunderstorm. 42 00:02:38,500 --> 00:02:40,380 Eric, I'm serious! 43 00:02:40,420 --> 00:02:42,860 I mean, what if we actually end up going to different colleges? 44 00:02:42,940 --> 00:02:45,300 And we're apart for four years? 45 00:02:45,380 --> 00:02:49,020 Then, come semester break, you better board up your windows. 46 00:02:49,100 --> 00:02:52,380 'Cause guess what? Here comes Hurricane Eric. 47 00:02:53,900 --> 00:02:57,100 Board up my windows? What are my windows? 48 00:02:57,180 --> 00:03:00,940 - And whatever they are, wouldn't you want them open? - Hmm. 49 00:03:01,020 --> 00:03:04,540 Look, Donna. All I'm saying is that I think we can get through anything. 50 00:03:04,620 --> 00:03:06,500 We go to different schools now, and we're fine... 51 00:03:06,580 --> 00:03:10,180 because our love is strong. 52 00:03:10,260 --> 00:03:13,140 Like a big, burly bear. 53 00:03:14,820 --> 00:03:16,740 So zip up your tent, 'cause guess what. 54 00:03:16,820 --> 00:03:19,340 This bear has claws. 55 00:03:19,420 --> 00:03:22,420 - Again, wouldn't you want my tent open? - Mmm. 56 00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:30,220 Hold it, you two. Now, before we hit the road... 57 00:03:30,300 --> 00:03:33,860 we need to have a talk about that horrible thing that's taken over your mother. 58 00:03:34,940 --> 00:03:39,100 You mean, her "change of life"? 59 00:03:39,180 --> 00:03:41,980 Thought we were calling it "the lady-parts problem." 60 00:03:43,900 --> 00:03:46,940 It goes by many names. 61 00:03:47,020 --> 00:03:49,460 Now, we're dealing with a tricky enemy here. 62 00:03:49,500 --> 00:03:52,980 I haven't been this frosty since Korea. 63 00:03:53,020 --> 00:03:55,140 And just like a commie... 64 00:03:55,220 --> 00:03:59,420 it can jump out and attack you at any moment. 65 00:03:59,460 --> 00:04:01,340 - (Kitty) Red, honey! - Incoming! 66 00:04:01,380 --> 00:04:03,540 (Eric) Retreat! 67 00:04:06,100 --> 00:04:11,060 Red, um, you know, I've been a tad bit moody lately. 68 00:04:11,100 --> 00:04:13,860 (Chuckles) So, um... 69 00:04:13,940 --> 00:04:16,060 if you don't want me to go on this trip, I'll understand. 70 00:04:16,140 --> 00:04:19,260 Well, you know, honey, there's really no need for you to go. 71 00:04:19,340 --> 00:04:21,900 I knew you didn't want me to go! 72 00:04:23,940 --> 00:04:27,420 Well, I am going, whether you like it or not. 73 00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:31,580 Why is it so damn hot in here? 74 00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:35,460 It's like it's- It's like we're living in hell! 75 00:04:36,660 --> 00:04:39,420 You can say that again. 76 00:04:41,700 --> 00:04:44,580 So, Steven? When I go to Marquette with Donna this weekend... 77 00:04:44,660 --> 00:04:46,980 there'll be lots of cute boys around. 78 00:04:47,060 --> 00:04:49,180 Lucky you. 79 00:04:49,260 --> 00:04:53,180 Well, unlucky them, because I won't let them kiss me. 80 00:04:53,260 --> 00:04:56,420 Yeah, that's my promise to you. 81 00:04:58,380 --> 00:05:01,780 Now, I'm not saying you have to promise me anything. 82 00:05:01,820 --> 00:05:04,820 But if you want to, now would be a good time. 83 00:05:08,380 --> 00:05:10,900 Okay, well, just know... 84 00:05:11,940 --> 00:05:14,100 that I won't be kissing anyone. 85 00:05:14,140 --> 00:05:16,420 Good to know. 86 00:05:16,500 --> 00:05:19,580 "Good to know"? That's it? 87 00:05:19,660 --> 00:05:22,740 Did I stutter? 88 00:05:22,820 --> 00:05:25,500 Oh, thanks for the help. 89 00:05:25,580 --> 00:05:29,860 You seem to have a natural talent for handling luggage. 90 00:05:35,980 --> 00:05:40,140 Red? Honey. You know, I'm sorry about our little spat. 91 00:05:40,220 --> 00:05:44,260 - The last thing I want to do is ruin our trip. - Oh, sweetheart, that's okay. 92 00:05:44,340 --> 00:05:46,260 - (Laughing) - (Chuckling) 93 00:05:47,620 --> 00:05:50,700 - Wow, Mom certainly cheered up. - Don't be fooled. 94 00:05:52,420 --> 00:05:54,580 She's a ticking time bomb. 95 00:05:57,180 --> 00:05:59,380 Hey! Wait up! 96 00:05:59,420 --> 00:06:02,260 What do you want? 97 00:06:02,300 --> 00:06:04,980 The explanation's pinned to my lapel. 98 00:06:11,140 --> 00:06:15,820 "Dear Red. Mr. Kelso and I are unable to take Michael to U.W. 99 00:06:15,900 --> 00:06:18,620 Here's $30 so he can go with you." 100 00:06:21,660 --> 00:06:25,340 - Where's the 30 bucks? - Oh, I bought this "electronical" football game. 101 00:06:27,460 --> 00:06:29,860 I swear to God, Kelso! 102 00:06:29,940 --> 00:06:32,700 You make Eric look like Einstein. 103 00:06:34,900 --> 00:06:36,820 Thank you, Daddy. 104 00:06:38,060 --> 00:06:40,260 "Thank you"? Einstein was ugly. 105 00:06:45,340 --> 00:06:47,700 Oh! It's like a sauna in here. 106 00:06:47,780 --> 00:06:49,900 Wish you didn't all have to breathe so much. 107 00:06:49,980 --> 00:06:53,260 All right, guys. You heard the lady. No more breathing! 108 00:06:53,340 --> 00:06:56,820 No, I didn't tell you not to breathe, I asked you not to breathe as much. 109 00:06:56,860 --> 00:06:58,900 There's a difference! 110 00:07:00,140 --> 00:07:02,740 (Softly) To crazy people. 111 00:07:02,820 --> 00:07:06,140 Hey, Ali Baba. Close sesame. 112 00:07:07,380 --> 00:07:09,900 - Oh! Red! You just missed the exit. - Oh, damn it! 113 00:07:09,980 --> 00:07:14,580 Eric, you're supposed to be following the map. What the hell are you doing back there? 114 00:07:14,620 --> 00:07:16,820 Makin' you a crown? 115 00:07:16,860 --> 00:07:19,220 'Cause you're "King of the Road"! 116 00:07:21,220 --> 00:07:23,220 - I need to use the bathroom. - Can you turn up the radio? 117 00:07:23,260 --> 00:07:25,140 - First and goal! - How much further? 118 00:07:25,180 --> 00:07:27,060 - (Electronic Game Warbles) - Touchdown! 119 00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:29,260 Would you all just shut up? 120 00:07:31,900 --> 00:07:34,020 (Sighs) This is stupid. 121 00:07:34,100 --> 00:07:37,580 I mean, why am I looking at a school I don't even want to go to? 122 00:07:37,660 --> 00:07:39,980 (Sighs) Should've gone to U.W. with Eric. 123 00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:43,300 And I should've laughed at his thunderstorm jokes. 124 00:07:43,380 --> 00:07:46,060 You know, I bet those sluts at U.W. will laugh at them. 125 00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:49,380 Sluts! 126 00:07:49,460 --> 00:07:51,900 What, U.W. has sluts? 127 00:07:51,980 --> 00:07:54,020 Steven loves sluts! 128 00:07:54,100 --> 00:07:56,620 He's not gonna do anything. He's with you now. 129 00:07:56,700 --> 00:07:58,860 I don't know if he is or not. 130 00:07:58,940 --> 00:08:01,780 I mean, look. Last week, he called me his girlfriend. 131 00:08:01,860 --> 00:08:04,300 And then this week, I couldn't even trick him into promising me... 132 00:08:04,380 --> 00:08:06,580 he wouldn't fool around with someone else. 133 00:08:06,620 --> 00:08:09,500 And I was very passive-aggressive. 134 00:08:09,580 --> 00:08:12,020 I believe that. 135 00:08:12,060 --> 00:08:14,180 Donna, I promised to be faithful. 136 00:08:14,260 --> 00:08:16,180 And all he said was, "Good to know." 137 00:08:16,220 --> 00:08:18,420 "Good to know," Donna! 138 00:08:18,460 --> 00:08:21,180 You know, I am too depressed to go to orientation with you. 139 00:08:21,260 --> 00:08:24,540 Steven crushed my spirit, and now there's only one place I can turn to. 140 00:08:24,580 --> 00:08:27,900 Please, God, don't let it be me. 141 00:08:27,940 --> 00:08:31,940 No. The cheerleading demonstration. 142 00:08:32,020 --> 00:08:35,100 I mean, at first, when they yell, "We've got spirit, how 'bout you?" 143 00:08:35,180 --> 00:08:37,340 Well, of course, I'll have to say no! 144 00:08:37,420 --> 00:08:41,380 But- But show me a human pyramid and a really sharp pom-pom waterfall... 145 00:08:41,460 --> 00:08:43,300 and I'll get it back. 146 00:08:47,700 --> 00:08:50,100 (House P.A.: Rock) 147 00:08:52,340 --> 00:08:54,260 What the hell kind of college is this? 148 00:08:54,300 --> 00:08:56,340 Barefoot hippies playin' Frisbee... 149 00:08:56,420 --> 00:08:59,260 barefoot hippies singin' songs to trees- 150 00:09:00,300 --> 00:09:03,260 Man, this place is awesome! 151 00:09:03,340 --> 00:09:07,220 Look, they even have dirty cartoons on the wall. 152 00:09:10,780 --> 00:09:13,820 Kelso, those are C.P.R. instructions. 153 00:09:14,940 --> 00:09:17,260 (Chuckles) Wow, I've done C.P.R. a lot. 154 00:09:19,460 --> 00:09:22,060 Hi. I'm Ted, resident adviser. 155 00:09:22,140 --> 00:09:24,940 - Hi. - Why don't you folks have a look around... 156 00:09:25,020 --> 00:09:27,860 and I'll show the boys where they're gonna be staying. 157 00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:31,740 I don't know about this place. 158 00:09:31,820 --> 00:09:36,820 I'll say. It's the middle of November. I don't see any Thanksgiving decorations. 159 00:09:37,940 --> 00:09:39,780 Visitors Weekend is great. 160 00:09:39,860 --> 00:09:42,460 We always have a big dorm party, tons of beer, tons of chicks. 161 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:45,620 Hey, I just need one six-pack and two chicks, and I'm good. 162 00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:50,780 Man, this place is great! It's too bad Donna couldn't make it. 163 00:09:50,860 --> 00:09:53,420 Oh, my God, would you look at that? 164 00:09:53,500 --> 00:09:56,820 We just saw college butt! 165 00:09:56,900 --> 00:09:59,260 On a girl! 166 00:10:01,980 --> 00:10:05,460 - Hold it. Girls live here too? - Yes, sir. We're coed. 167 00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:08,300 - (Clamoring) - (Kelso) Oh, nice! 168 00:10:08,380 --> 00:10:11,100 That's it! You're staying with us at the motel. 169 00:10:11,140 --> 00:10:13,260 Wait! Dad, wait. 170 00:10:13,340 --> 00:10:16,500 Think of what a valuable experience this could be for me. 171 00:10:16,580 --> 00:10:19,300 I mean, this is my first step into the real world. 172 00:10:19,380 --> 00:10:23,100 (Sighs) I'm your little bird, Dad. 173 00:10:23,180 --> 00:10:25,220 Give me wings to fly! 174 00:10:29,020 --> 00:10:31,340 Butch it up and get in the car. 175 00:10:33,260 --> 00:10:36,820 Excuse me. This is your C.P.R. coach. 176 00:10:38,620 --> 00:10:42,260 I'm gonna need to check your lung capacities! (Laughing) 177 00:10:42,300 --> 00:10:44,220 That means their boobs. 178 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:55,240 (Game Beeping, Chirping) 179 00:10:58,760 --> 00:11:04,080 There's got to be at least one all-male dormitory on this campus. 180 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,800 Ha! Here it is. 181 00:11:08,880 --> 00:11:12,240 Right in between the chapel and the School of Interior Design. 182 00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,880 (Clicks Tongue) Boys, um- 183 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:22,080 um, I realize that, uh... 184 00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:26,000 I may have been a little irrational today. 185 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,560 - A little? - (Screams) Shut up! 186 00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:39,800 So, um, maybe now is a good time for me to... 187 00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:43,640 explain a few things to you about menopause. 188 00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:51,280 And, um, lucky for you, I'm a nurse, so I can use the proper terms, like... 189 00:11:51,360 --> 00:11:54,560 - "epithelial lining" and "uterine wall." - (Eric Groans) 190 00:11:58,120 --> 00:12:00,640 I'm hooked. 191 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:04,520 Okay, so. Um, now. 192 00:12:04,560 --> 00:12:07,840 Say these soaps are my ovaries. 193 00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:12,160 Kill me now. 194 00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:14,920 Can't hear ya, man. I'm on a beach in Florida. 195 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:19,840 Okay, um, about a month ago... 196 00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:21,960 - they stopped producing- - (Game Beeping) 197 00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:27,760 - they stopped- - (Beeping) 198 00:12:27,840 --> 00:12:29,760 - stopped producing- - (Chirping) 199 00:12:29,800 --> 00:12:32,440 That's it! 200 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:34,400 (Crashing) 201 00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:42,440 What is wrong with you? Were you dropped on your head? 202 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:47,240 Yes, I was! 203 00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:53,920 And up until now, everyone had the good grace not to mention it. 204 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:04,720 - Okay, boys. Time to leave. - Yes! 205 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:12,880 Mrs. Forman? I'm sorry. I washed my face with your ovaries. 206 00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:21,080 Get out. 207 00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:30,800 So that's a great beard. I've never made out with a guy with a beard. 208 00:13:30,880 --> 00:13:33,640 Well, this could be your lucky day. 209 00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:36,040 - You want to go to my room? - Absolutely. 210 00:13:38,760 --> 00:13:40,640 You know what? I-I can't. 211 00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:44,400 Okay. But if you change your mind, a few of us girls will be in the shower. 212 00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:52,280 I can go! 213 00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:55,320 My name is Fez! 214 00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,840 Don't pretend you don't see me! 215 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:03,160 Man, what the hell did I just do? 216 00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:05,120 I just turned down a sure thing because ofJackie. 217 00:14:05,200 --> 00:14:07,560 And you don't know what she's doin' at Marquette. 218 00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:09,680 Or who. 219 00:14:09,760 --> 00:14:12,440 Man, she said she wouldn't do anything. 220 00:14:12,520 --> 00:14:17,000 Yeah, but I bet if she did, you'd cry because you love her. 221 00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:20,680 If you don't shut up, you'll be the first person to touch his chin to his ass. 222 00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:24,160 Have you been spying on me? 223 00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:27,560 I see U.W. has a pretty good C.P.R. program. 224 00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:32,040 It's gonna be my major. 225 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:38,520 So, I told my girlfriend, "We can go to separate schools." 226 00:14:38,600 --> 00:14:41,040 - I mean, people do that all the time, right? - Yeah. 227 00:14:41,120 --> 00:14:43,960 My boyfriend goes to school in New York, and we've been together for three years. 228 00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:47,200 - And we're in love now more than ever. - Of course you are. 229 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:51,120 And I bet when you two get together, it's like a thunderstorm, right? 230 00:14:52,520 --> 00:14:55,240 Hey, pretty lady. 231 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:58,720 Hey, excuse me. Hello? 232 00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:02,560 - Didn't you just say you had a boyfriend? - Yeah. But he's not here. 233 00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:12,080 Did you just see that? I told Donna we could go to different schools... 234 00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:15,080 and I was extremely wrong, and- 235 00:15:15,160 --> 00:15:17,800 Man, if she doesn't hate Marquette, we're screwed. 236 00:15:17,840 --> 00:15:21,320 Who cares, man? I just turned down a half-drunk college girl. 237 00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:25,000 I'm pretty sure she knew how to do stuff. 238 00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:31,480 Eric? Is everything okay? 239 00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:35,160 Yeah. Everything's fine. I just wanted to see how you liked Marquette. 240 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:38,560 And, can I just say, if that snooty switchboard operator's attitude... 241 00:15:38,640 --> 00:15:40,720 is any indication of the Marquette experience, then- 242 00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:44,040 (Chuckles) I can only assume we're crossing Marquette off the list right now. 243 00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:46,320 No, actually, it's great. 244 00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:48,240 Okay, they have this English professor. 245 00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:52,520 He wears a beret and a corduroy jacket, but he listens to Zeppelin! 246 00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:55,720 Uh, yeah, well, U.W. has a vending machine, so- (Scoffing) 247 00:15:59,320 --> 00:16:02,920 - Donna, I love you. - I love you too. Bye. 248 00:16:02,960 --> 00:16:05,040 (TV Show Theme) 249 00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:07,920 (Sobbing) 250 00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:12,360 You gonna cry now too? 251 00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:18,200 You know who had a real family? The Waltons. 252 00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:22,400 We're just three strangers sitting in a room! 253 00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:27,360 - (Door Closes) - Donna loves it there. 254 00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:29,840 I don't know what to do. 255 00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:31,840 There's nothing any of us can do. 256 00:16:31,920 --> 00:16:33,800 We're all screwed. 257 00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:37,320 You think I like being stuck here... 258 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:41,240 nursing my lunatic wife back from the brink? 259 00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:43,240 Hell, no. 260 00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:46,520 But we can't control what happens to us. 261 00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:51,880 Even if, by some stroke of luck, you actually hang on to Donna... 262 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:54,760 eventually, she's gonna turn into that. 263 00:16:56,600 --> 00:17:00,360 And then, a few years later, you'll die. 264 00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:07,040 Good. Thanks for the bedtime story. 265 00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:14,200 Donna? I hate it here, and I want to go home. 266 00:17:14,280 --> 00:17:18,600 Wait, what's wrong? Was there a height requirement for the cheerleading team? 267 00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:22,520 No, it was awful! And when the cheerleaders were yelling, "Go, team, go"... 268 00:17:22,600 --> 00:17:27,840 all I was hearing was Steven saying, "Good to know. Good to know!" 269 00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:32,120 Jackie, your problem is, is you're always trying to force people into doing stuff. 270 00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:36,600 Oh! I do not, Donna. Now, you feel sorry for me right now. 271 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:39,960 You can't make someone like Hyde do anything. 272 00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:42,120 You have to deal with him the way he deals with you. 273 00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:45,080 Look, pretend you don't care what he does, and he'll come around. 274 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:48,600 Well, I guess it's worth a try. 275 00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:51,200 You know, being with a real man is complicated. 276 00:17:51,280 --> 00:17:54,480 You are so lucky you're with Eric. 277 00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:57,280 What? 278 00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:02,720 What a wonderful weekend! 279 00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:05,240 We should go away more often! 280 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:08,360 They gotta make a pill for this. 281 00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:13,800 Oh, Hyde, I've been meaning to tell you. 282 00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:16,080 (Singsongy) Hyde and Jackie, sitting in a tree. 283 00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:21,320 They're in love like two monkeys. (Laughing) 284 00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:24,320 Would you shut up, Fez? That's not even how it goes. 285 00:18:24,360 --> 00:18:28,000 - Well, is it making you mad? - Yes. 286 00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:30,440 - Well, then, that's how it goes. - (Clinks) 287 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:36,040 - Hey. - Hey. 288 00:18:37,160 --> 00:18:39,800 Look, Jackie. I know you were worried before... 289 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:42,120 so, I just want to let you know... 290 00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:44,520 nothin' happened on my end this weekend. 291 00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:51,080 I'm not tellin' you that so you'll tell me what you did. 292 00:18:54,520 --> 00:18:57,560 I just want to let you know what happened with me. 293 00:18:57,640 --> 00:19:00,360 That's my report to you. 294 00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:05,440 All right. Good to know. 295 00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:10,080 - "Good to know"? - D-Did I stutter? 296 00:19:16,680 --> 00:19:20,160 - Hi. - Okay. 297 00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:22,520 I know you love Marquette, and I made my peace with that. 298 00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:25,280 So if that means we're gonna go to separate schools and drift apart... 299 00:19:25,320 --> 00:19:28,960 and make out with guys named Ted, then- 300 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:31,440 That's just the way it's gonna be, because you're gonna get menopause... 301 00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:35,120 and I'm gonna die, and we can't control anything that happens to us! 302 00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:41,560 - I'm not going to Marquette. - Well, then never mind. 303 00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:44,640 I mean, Eric- 304 00:19:44,680 --> 00:19:47,200 I loved it, and when I was driving home... 305 00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:49,320 I was so excited to tell you about it... 306 00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:51,520 and then the drive took forever. 307 00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:55,240 And I realized, that's how far away I'd be from you all the time. 308 00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:57,560 And I don't want that. 309 00:19:57,640 --> 00:19:59,880 So I'll just tell my dad I want to go to U.W. with you. 310 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:03,800 Donna, you have no idea... 311 00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:05,720 - how happy you just made me. - (Laughs) 312 00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:09,000 Eric, this is gonna be great! We're gonna be together all the time. 313 00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:11,000 Oh, um- (Clicks Tongue) 314 00:20:13,640 --> 00:20:16,600 - you're not gonna get all clingy, right? - (Laughs) 315 00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:19,600 - Shut up. - Now, come on. I'm gonna be a big college man. 316 00:20:19,680 --> 00:20:21,640 - Uh-huh. - I'm gonna need my space. 317 00:20:25,620 --> 00:20:27,620 What do you want? 318 00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:29,940 Once again, the explanation is pinned to my lapel. 319 00:20:32,260 --> 00:20:35,380 "Dear Mr. and Mrs. Forman. Please give Michael $30... 320 00:20:35,460 --> 00:20:38,180 "for the game you threw out the window and broke. 321 00:20:39,340 --> 00:20:41,460 Signed, my parents." 322 00:20:42,820 --> 00:20:44,780 (Laughs) 323 00:20:47,780 --> 00:20:50,060 Well, you made her laugh. That's worth 30 bucks.