1
00:00:01,626 --> 00:00:04,838
♪ It seems today
that all you see ♪
2
00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:08,133
♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV ♪
3
00:00:08,133 --> 00:00:11,720
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪
4
00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:14,723
♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
5
00:00:14,723 --> 00:00:18,226
♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
6
00:00:18,226 --> 00:00:21,521
♪ Lucky there's a man who
positively can do ♪
7
00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:23,106
♪ All the things that make us ♪
8
00:00:23,106 --> 00:00:24,524
♪ Laugh and cry ♪
9
00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:30,113
♪ He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
10
00:00:35,869 --> 00:00:39,122
{\an8}Anybody know how to empty
the reservoir on a RealDoll?
11
00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:41,583
{\an8}'Cause the website is
mostly testimonials.
12
00:00:41,583 --> 00:00:44,586
{\an8}Peter, of course you know
what today is.
13
00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:46,838
{\an8}Yeah, Donald Sutherland's
birthday.
14
00:00:46,838 --> 00:00:49,132
{\an8}And maybe another special day?
15
00:00:49,132 --> 00:00:50,550
{\an8}National dachshund day.
16
00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:54,220
{\an8}Oh, Peter, you forgot our
anniversary again, didn't you?
17
00:00:54,220 --> 00:00:57,140
{\an8}What? No, no, I-I got you
an awesome gift.
18
00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:59,142
{\an8}But you can't see it
until tonight.
19
00:00:59,142 --> 00:01:00,935
{\an8}Tonight? Wh-Why tonight?
20
00:01:00,935 --> 00:01:03,730
{\an8}Oh, you'll see.
Tonight is gonna be amazing.
21
00:01:03,730 --> 00:01:05,398
{\an8}You're gonna smile
bigger than I did
22
00:01:05,398 --> 00:01:07,442
{\an8}when I was on the cover
of Mad magazine.
23
00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:09,194
[laughs]
24
00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:12,030
You kids don't remember Mad
or magazines.
25
00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:14,449
Fortunately, I'm on
broadcast television.
26
00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:16,368
What, me worry?
27
00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:17,994
Okay, me worry.
28
00:01:21,039 --> 00:01:23,500
{\an8}I wonder how old
Donald Sutherland is today.
29
00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:25,877
{\an8}- I don't know, pretty old.
- He looks good, though.
30
00:01:25,877 --> 00:01:27,379
{\an8}And you know what?
I think the key there
31
00:01:27,379 --> 00:01:29,047
{\an8}is never looking good.
32
00:01:29,047 --> 00:01:30,924
{\an8}Brian, quick, check out
your six O'clock.
33
00:01:30,924 --> 00:01:33,259
{\an8}Or-or your nine o'clock.
I can't tell time.
34
00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,596
{\an8}A perfectly good mini fridge.
35
00:01:36,596 --> 00:01:38,598
{\an8}Well, you're gonna have to
fight Danny DeVito for it.
36
00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:40,016
{\an8}Would you look at that.
37
00:01:40,016 --> 00:01:42,769
{\an8}A perfectly good,
normal-size fridge.
38
00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:44,145
{\an8}You know what?
39
00:01:44,145 --> 00:01:46,523
{\an8}If this works,
I'm going to put it in my room.
40
00:01:46,523 --> 00:01:48,692
{\an8}Stewie, you're too little
to have a fridge in your room.
41
00:01:48,692 --> 00:01:50,777
{\an8}Think whatever you want, Brian,
but I'm taking this
42
00:01:50,777 --> 00:01:52,153
{\an8}before Danny DeVito gets it.
43
00:01:52,153 --> 00:01:54,572
{\an8}That's all right, kid.
I don't need it anymore.
44
00:01:54,572 --> 00:01:56,408
{\an8}[singers]
♪ Danny DeVito ♪
45
00:01:56,408 --> 00:01:59,077
{\an8}♪ Got bit by a magic mosquito. ♪
46
00:01:59,077 --> 00:02:01,454
{\an8}[announcer] Danny DeVito
and the Magic Mosquito,
47
00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:03,123
{\an8}now streaming on Peacock.
48
00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:05,750
{\an8}I'm hearing a lot of buzz.
49
00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:12,799
{\an8}There he is.
Here comes the groom!
50
00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:14,259
{\an8}- [noisemakers blare]
- [applause]
51
00:02:14,259 --> 00:02:16,636
{\an8}Geez, even you guys know
it's my anniversary?
52
00:02:16,636 --> 00:02:18,430
{\an8}- How is that possible?
- It's easy.
53
00:02:18,430 --> 00:02:20,807
{\an8}- I follow your wife.
- You mean on Instagram?
54
00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:22,851
{\an8}Yep.
55
00:02:22,851 --> 00:02:24,269
{\an8}Peter, let me guess.
56
00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:26,354
{\an8}You forgot
your anniversary again.
57
00:02:26,354 --> 00:02:28,815
{\an8}Yeah. What's worse, I lied,
and I told Lois
58
00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:30,817
{\an8}I had a awesome gift planned
for tonight.
59
00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:32,444
{\an8}If I don't come up with
something amazing,
60
00:02:32,444 --> 00:02:33,778
{\an8}I am so screwed.
61
00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:35,864
{\an8}Hey, you want to
give Lois a treat?
62
00:02:35,864 --> 00:02:37,115
{\an8}Popcorn-ucopia.
63
00:02:37,115 --> 00:02:38,783
{\an8}Now, they're a little outfit
out there
64
00:02:38,783 --> 00:02:41,244
{\an8}in Fort Wayne, Indiana,
family owned and operated
65
00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:44,539
{\an8}for five generations over there
in the "Crossroads of America."
66
00:02:44,539 --> 00:02:45,749
{\an8}Indiana's state motto.
67
00:02:45,749 --> 00:02:47,709
{\an8}And get this.
They make a metal cannister
68
00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:49,586
{\an8}with three different kinds
of popcorn,
69
00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:51,463
{\an8}but they're separated!
70
00:02:51,463 --> 00:02:54,049
{\an8}Maybe you should just
take Lois out
71
00:02:54,049 --> 00:02:55,592
{\an8}to a fine restaurant.
72
00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:59,012
{\an8}Now, I can hear some of you
saying, "Joe, why separated?"
73
00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:00,722
{\an8}None of us are saying that, Joe.
74
00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:02,140
Okay, here's why.
75
00:03:02,140 --> 00:03:05,143
Three flavors of popcorn
in one tin, and they don't mix.
76
00:03:05,143 --> 00:03:06,895
Unless, of course,
you want them to mix.
77
00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:08,229
This is a home run, man.
78
00:03:08,229 --> 00:03:09,981
Kind of short notice
to get a good table
79
00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:11,316
in any restaurant.
80
00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:12,942
I don't think you appreciate
that they don't mix.
81
00:03:12,942 --> 00:03:14,986
Your caramel corn stays separate
from your cheese corn,
82
00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:16,446
which stays separate
from your corn corn.
83
00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:18,198
You see, in the past,
you would need
84
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:19,991
- three tubs of corn.
- Yes, we get it!
85
00:03:19,991 --> 00:03:21,659
We know about the corn, Joe!
86
00:03:21,659 --> 00:03:24,746
[chuckles]
Honestly, I don't think you do.
87
00:03:24,746 --> 00:03:26,414
Forgive me for eavesdropping,
88
00:03:26,414 --> 00:03:29,250
but I have a flat-bottom dory
with a quiet outboard
89
00:03:29,250 --> 00:03:30,669
I'd be glad to lend you.
90
00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:32,629
Full moon tonight.
Why not take your bride
91
00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:35,256
on a romantic cruise
around Quahog Harbor?
92
00:03:35,256 --> 00:03:37,550
You know what?
I think Lois would like that.
93
00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:40,970
Ooh, the romantic boat ride
is the perfect surprise.
94
00:03:40,970 --> 00:03:42,430
You can bring along
a tub of popcorn,
95
00:03:42,430 --> 00:03:43,515
'cause the tin's waterproof.
96
00:03:43,515 --> 00:03:45,016
And if you'd like, I could also
97
00:03:45,016 --> 00:03:48,186
row up alongside you and
play "Brandy" on the accordion.
98
00:03:48,186 --> 00:03:49,729
Yeah, no, just the boat, thanks.
99
00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:51,773
Aw, I always drive past my exit.
100
00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:53,316
Lois is gonna love this, Peter.
101
00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:54,859
She's gonna think
you're a true romantic,
102
00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:56,277
like Michael Douglas.
103
00:03:56,277 --> 00:03:59,906
So who wants to hear
how I think I got mouth cancer?
104
00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:03,076
She's, uh...
105
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,703
She's heard this one before.
106
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:08,832
Check it out, Rupert.
107
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:10,458
Juice box, boom!
108
00:04:10,458 --> 00:04:11,751
Go-Gurts? Yep.
109
00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,586
And most importantly,
for freshness,
110
00:04:13,586 --> 00:04:16,381
an open box of
Armie Hammer's Baking Powder,
111
00:04:16,381 --> 00:04:18,883
now with 40% more fingers.
112
00:04:18,883 --> 00:04:21,928
Pretty much all he had to do
was not eat people.
113
00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:23,596
How the hell did you
get that up here?
114
00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:25,390
With no help from you, thanks.
115
00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:27,600
But you know what?
You still get a cola.
116
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,728
Ah. Convenient, I guess.
117
00:04:29,728 --> 00:04:31,021
Can's not so cold, though.
118
00:04:31,021 --> 00:04:32,814
Yeah, everything in there
is either lukewarm
119
00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:34,315
or frozen solid.
120
00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:35,942
Stewie, I still think
it's a bad idea
121
00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:37,360
for you to have this thing
in here.
122
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:39,154
Yeah, not really looking for
advice from the guy
123
00:04:39,154 --> 00:04:42,741
who puts a fire emoji on
all Dua Lipa's Instagram posts.
124
00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:44,242
She's not gonna respond, Bri.
125
00:04:44,242 --> 00:04:46,536
She used to respond
before she had so many fans.
126
00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:48,913
She was 14!
And she thought you were 11
127
00:04:48,913 --> 00:04:51,124
- because you said you were 11.
- Because I was 11!
128
00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:52,709
See? You're still saying it.
129
00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:58,048
Well, happy anniversary, Lois.
130
00:04:58,048 --> 00:05:00,258
Huh? Did I tell you?
Isn't this nice?
131
00:05:00,258 --> 00:05:02,844
You know, I have to admit
I had my doubts,
132
00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:05,513
but you really surprised me.
133
00:05:05,513 --> 00:05:07,766
A romantic dinner on a boat?
134
00:05:07,766 --> 00:05:09,768
Right? Who needs
a fancy restaurant
135
00:05:09,768 --> 00:05:11,728
when you can be wet
and kind of dizzy?
136
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:14,064
Oh, Peter, it's just perfect.
137
00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:15,607
Well, except for
that cruise ship
138
00:05:15,607 --> 00:05:17,484
that still can't dock
because of COVID.
139
00:05:17,484 --> 00:05:19,361
Is the election over yet?
140
00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:21,780
We are all pooping in the sink!
141
00:05:21,780 --> 00:05:24,282
I'm from Iowa, so I still think
this is awesome.
142
00:05:24,282 --> 00:05:26,326
Oh, there's something
about the ocean
143
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,703
that's always been
so magical to me.
144
00:05:28,703 --> 00:05:31,998
And I say we celebrate.
145
00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:33,291
[gasps]
146
00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:38,922
Ah, now we're talking.
147
00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:41,675
All right, cannonball!
148
00:05:46,304 --> 00:05:47,931
[voice muffled]
♪ There's got to be ♪
149
00:05:47,931 --> 00:05:51,226
♪ A morning after. ♪
150
00:05:51,226 --> 00:05:52,727
[people scream]
151
00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:56,022
[Lois laughs]
152
00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:58,358
Peter, I feel like a kid again.
153
00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:00,110
Isn't this exhilarating?
154
00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:01,986
The moon, the stars,
155
00:06:01,986 --> 00:06:04,989
the dark triangular
dorsal fin heading our way.
156
00:06:04,989 --> 00:06:08,410
The dark triangular dorsal fin
heading our way!
157
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:11,204
Shark!
158
00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:12,747
[panicked shouts]
159
00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:16,543
[Lois cries out]
160
00:06:18,169 --> 00:06:22,007
Peter! Peter, don't leave me
to die out here!
161
00:06:22,007 --> 00:06:24,259
Peter, come back!
162
00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:27,470
Hold on, Lois. I'm gonna grab
a real quick hot chocolate.
163
00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:28,930
Warm up my bones.
164
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,726
[screams]
165
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,686
- [screams]
- [squeaking]
166
00:06:34,686 --> 00:06:36,855
Oh, God. Thank God.
167
00:06:36,855 --> 00:06:38,565
It's just a dolphin.
168
00:06:40,150 --> 00:06:41,568
[grunts]
169
00:06:41,568 --> 00:06:43,319
[panting]
170
00:06:43,319 --> 00:06:44,654
Ah, perfect.
171
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,201
[phone dings]
172
00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:01,046
Hey, good morning, lovebirds.
173
00:07:01,046 --> 00:07:02,922
So, how'd
the moonlight cruise go?
174
00:07:02,922 --> 00:07:05,216
Dad saw a shark
and left Mom to die.
175
00:07:05,216 --> 00:07:07,010
Oh, come on.
All that nice stuff
176
00:07:07,010 --> 00:07:09,763
I did last night, we're only
gonna focus on that one thing?
177
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,306
Damn it, Peter,
you're supposed to be
178
00:07:11,306 --> 00:07:12,807
the alpha in my life.
179
00:07:12,807 --> 00:07:15,101
Someone to stand up
and take charge.
180
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,937
But you never even looked back
to see if I was okay.
181
00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:19,981
Y-You just raced off.
182
00:07:19,981 --> 00:07:22,233
You hear about Anne Heche?
Sad, huh?
183
00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:24,069
Peter, don't try
to change the subject!
184
00:07:24,069 --> 00:07:25,737
You were always jealous of her!
185
00:07:25,737 --> 00:07:26,988
You know what, Peter?
186
00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:28,823
I am so disappointed in you,
187
00:07:28,823 --> 00:07:31,659
I am taking the exclamation
points out of this argument.
188
00:07:31,659 --> 00:07:32,911
You can't do that.
189
00:07:32,911 --> 00:07:34,829
Male arguments are powerless
without volume.
190
00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:36,456
That just leaves us with words.
191
00:07:37,499 --> 00:07:38,583
[calmly]
I'm done here.
192
00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:43,922
Wow, Peter, I've never
seen Lois so upset.
193
00:07:43,922 --> 00:07:45,048
Looks like you're in--
194
00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:46,591
and I find this phrase
offensive--
195
00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:47,926
the doghouse.
196
00:07:47,926 --> 00:07:50,178
Oh, I've solved
bigger problems than this.
197
00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:52,764
Like when I forgot the safe word
at that sex party.
198
00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:54,516
Aardvark. Aah!
199
00:07:54,516 --> 00:07:56,726
Aardwolf. Abacus. Aah!
200
00:07:56,726 --> 00:07:59,187
Abandon. Aah! Abase. Aah!
201
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:01,731
Abate. Aah! Abattoir.
202
00:08:01,731 --> 00:08:03,400
[Peter]
The good news was
I had memorized
203
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:06,069
the entire dictionary
when I got bored over COVID.
204
00:08:06,069 --> 00:08:08,488
The bad news was
the safe word was "zyzzyva,"
205
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:10,448
a genus of
South American weevils,
206
00:08:10,448 --> 00:08:13,076
which, coincidentally,
I was forced to keister.
207
00:08:13,076 --> 00:08:15,995
[reggae music playing]
208
00:08:17,372 --> 00:08:19,374
[phone clicking]
209
00:08:23,086 --> 00:08:25,547
Bri, what up, dawg?
Grab a brewski from the mini.
210
00:08:25,547 --> 00:08:26,715
I can't have any more, though.
211
00:08:26,715 --> 00:08:28,299
Got to cram for a test
in the morning.
212
00:08:28,299 --> 00:08:30,218
Where exactly
are you going to school?
213
00:08:30,218 --> 00:08:32,262
Um, University of College.
214
00:08:32,262 --> 00:08:33,638
Not for long, though.
215
00:08:33,638 --> 00:08:35,640
Just got my grades. Not good.
216
00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:37,017
Stewie, I think
this fridge thing...
217
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,810
Yo check out my Maxim posters.
218
00:08:38,810 --> 00:08:41,896
Hot, right? No, no. Yes, yes.
219
00:08:41,896 --> 00:08:43,481
No, yes, no.
220
00:08:43,481 --> 00:08:46,651
- Why would you put up the nos?
- So you know when it's a yes.
221
00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:48,028
Stewie, we got to talk.
222
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,238
Brah, if this is about
you and I being roommates,
223
00:08:50,238 --> 00:08:52,115
I was gonna put a word in
with Colin,
224
00:08:52,115 --> 00:08:53,199
but I already have one.
225
00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:55,243
Brian, meet Guy.
226
00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:57,662
Guy? Okay. Pleased to meet you.
227
00:08:57,662 --> 00:08:59,205
Oh, Guy doesn't speak
much English.
228
00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:01,207
He's from Quebec.
Engineering, I think.
229
00:09:01,207 --> 00:09:03,960
But he is insane, Brian.
A legend.
230
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:05,670
Guy. Allons.
231
00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:10,383
Ah, look at him drinking
that soda.
232
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:11,843
Classic Guy.
233
00:09:11,843 --> 00:09:13,845
- Okay, anyway, Stewie...
- Can't talk now, Bri.
234
00:09:13,845 --> 00:09:16,348
Got to spend some time
messing around on the guitar.
235
00:09:16,348 --> 00:09:19,601
[discordant notes]
236
00:09:19,601 --> 00:09:20,935
I didn't even know you played.
237
00:09:20,935 --> 00:09:22,729
Oh, yeah, all the time. A lot.
238
00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,606
Bros down the hall
call me "Ramen,"
239
00:09:24,606 --> 00:09:25,648
'cause I'm always noodling.
240
00:09:25,648 --> 00:09:28,151
Hey, what's going on, No Pubes?
241
00:09:28,151 --> 00:09:31,154
They-they... they call,
they call me a lot of things.
242
00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:36,242
Lois, I told you
I would make it up to you,
243
00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:38,620
so I got you something
very special.
244
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:42,123
I got you in the opening credits
of SNL.
245
00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:43,333
- [lively music playing]
- [Peter] Okay, look.
246
00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:45,043
Here comes Kenan.
247
00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:46,670
Oh, look at him
playfully hailing a cab.
248
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:49,589
And here you are.
249
00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,216
Look how cool and hip you look
250
00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:54,052
walking by a manhole cover
with steam coming out of it.
251
00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:58,682
Uhp, looks like Kenan's
still trying to wave down a cab.
252
00:09:58,682 --> 00:10:02,018
Ah, there you go again!
Now you're at the club,
253
00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:03,937
holding up a "one more" signal
for a drink.
254
00:10:05,397 --> 00:10:07,232
Why won't nobody stop for Kenan?
255
00:10:08,650 --> 00:10:11,403
Oh, but Mikey Day
gets a cab first try.
256
00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:12,904
Oh, he's sharing it with Kenan.
257
00:10:12,904 --> 00:10:14,572
He's sharing it. Okay.
258
00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:18,618
Oh, a very stressful
opening credits this week.
259
00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:23,707
Stewie, did you do this?
260
00:10:23,707 --> 00:10:26,126
Geez, Brian, don't just come
barging in here like that.
261
00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,211
I thought you were
campus security.
262
00:10:29,379 --> 00:10:30,922
Guy pushed an air conditioner
263
00:10:30,922 --> 00:10:32,424
off the parking garage yesterday.
264
00:10:32,424 --> 00:10:34,426
Almost hit
a public safety officer.
265
00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:35,760
By the way, that's between us.
266
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:37,762
They're going door to door.
It's pretty serious.
267
00:10:37,762 --> 00:10:38,930
I don't care about that.
268
00:10:38,930 --> 00:10:40,807
I want to know who wrote
"renob" on my chest
269
00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:42,058
when I was sleeping.
270
00:10:42,058 --> 00:10:44,436
"Renob"? Brian,
you read that in the mirror.
271
00:10:44,436 --> 00:10:46,146
- It's "boner."
- What?!
272
00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:47,522
Great. Thanks, Bri.
273
00:10:47,522 --> 00:10:50,025
Now we've got the R.A.
coming in to check on us.
274
00:10:50,025 --> 00:10:52,444
Hey, Stewie, Guy, look,
275
00:10:52,444 --> 00:10:56,740
I like fun as much as anybody,
but we've had some complaints,
276
00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:59,909
and you really got to keep
the noise down in here.
277
00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:02,912
Oh, and, hey, I reviewed
your party application,
278
00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:04,664
and everything looks
to be in order,
279
00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:06,583
so you're good to go.
280
00:11:06,583 --> 00:11:08,001
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
wait a minute. Party?
281
00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,295
- Who's having a party?
- I am.
282
00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:12,589
And it'll be loaded
with chicks, thanks to Guy.
283
00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:14,424
This guy's all about
the poutine,
284
00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:16,509
which sounds dirty,
but it's just a gravy
285
00:11:16,509 --> 00:11:18,011
they put on French fries.
286
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:20,472
Stewie, you've taken this
mini fridge thing too far.
287
00:11:20,472 --> 00:11:21,890
I'm moving this thing
out of here.
288
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:24,142
Oh, be careful, Bri.
Not a good idea.
289
00:11:24,142 --> 00:11:25,602
You don't want to piss off Guy.
290
00:11:25,602 --> 00:11:27,145
Yesterday he crow-hopped
a dip tin
291
00:11:27,145 --> 00:11:28,438
and knocked a guy out.
292
00:11:28,438 --> 00:11:29,647
Oh, wow, did he really?
293
00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:32,025
Well, now I'm so
very scared of Guy.
294
00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:34,486
- Aah!
- Oh, ho, ho, Guy.
295
00:11:34,486 --> 00:11:36,237
Ce fut un grand lancer!
296
00:11:36,237 --> 00:11:38,365
Je crois qu'il est mort, eh?
297
00:11:43,578 --> 00:11:46,331
Special flowers
for a special lady.
298
00:11:46,331 --> 00:11:48,041
Hmm. These are nice.
299
00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:49,584
Except... [sniffs]
300
00:11:49,584 --> 00:11:51,795
They smell like--
What is that, exhaust?
301
00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:54,756
Why is there a picture
of a teenage Latina on them?
302
00:11:54,756 --> 00:11:57,300
Peter, did you steal these
from a roadside memorial?
303
00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:59,719
They didn't love her
as much as I love you, Lois.
304
00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:01,680
Besides, it's not like
she can see 'em.
305
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:03,973
Stolen flowers? Really, Peter?
306
00:12:03,973 --> 00:12:05,475
Is that all I mean to you?
307
00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:07,227
Well, there's also a candle
with one of them
308
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:09,020
spooky skeletons from Coco.
309
00:12:09,020 --> 00:12:11,606
You know, Peter,
a relationship is
310
00:12:11,606 --> 00:12:13,400
supposed to grow over time,
311
00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:16,194
to give you a sense of purpose
and meaning.
312
00:12:16,194 --> 00:12:18,113
But after all these years
with you,
313
00:12:18,113 --> 00:12:20,657
I-I just feel worthless.
314
00:12:20,657 --> 00:12:24,119
I feel as worthless as any coin
smaller than a quarter.
315
00:12:24,119 --> 00:12:26,788
Hello, my name is Nickel.
316
00:12:26,788 --> 00:12:28,248
[all]
Hi, Nickel.
317
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,417
There was a time when I paid for
318
00:12:30,417 --> 00:12:32,961
a ride on a trolley,
or a good cigar,
319
00:12:32,961 --> 00:12:35,922
or a hand-cranked film
of a man tipping his hat
320
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,757
and twirling his moustache.
321
00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:40,927
But yesterday, I was part of
a handful of change
322
00:12:40,927 --> 00:12:42,345
at a McDonald's,
323
00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:44,723
and the teenage girl
threw us out.
324
00:12:44,723 --> 00:12:48,518
Just-just threw us in the trash
with the wrappers and the bag.
325
00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:50,061
[sobs]
326
00:12:50,061 --> 00:12:52,105
Yeah. And I'm voiced
by Kevin Hart.
327
00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:54,983
{\an8}[announcer] Coming this fall
from Pixar, Coins!
328
00:12:54,983 --> 00:12:58,236
{\an8}We'll keep making things talk
until you don't show up.
329
00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:00,530
Come on, Lois. Are you gonna
stay mad at me forever?
330
00:13:00,530 --> 00:13:03,283
I've done stupid things before,
and you've always forgiven me.
331
00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:04,951
Oh, I forgive you, Peter.
332
00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:06,745
I just don't think
I'll ever be able to see you
333
00:13:06,745 --> 00:13:10,290
as a man, my protector
or a real husband again.
334
00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:12,500
Oh, okay.
335
00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:13,918
I see.
336
00:13:13,918 --> 00:13:16,379
Well, if that's how you feel,
I'll just take my things
337
00:13:16,379 --> 00:13:17,672
and get out of your way.
338
00:13:21,384 --> 00:13:23,011
This is a different RealDoll.
339
00:13:23,011 --> 00:13:25,263
I never figured out
how to empty the other one.
340
00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:32,979
This is not good, guys.
341
00:13:32,979 --> 00:13:34,606
She put a little
black-and-white TV
342
00:13:34,606 --> 00:13:37,025
on the sun porch
and then slept there last night.
343
00:13:37,025 --> 00:13:40,153
Ooh, that's the angriest
a New England wife can get.
344
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:42,739
Look, if I could do it
all over again, I'd save her,
345
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,449
'cause now I know
it was a dolphin
346
00:13:44,449 --> 00:13:45,992
and there was no real danger.
347
00:13:45,992 --> 00:13:47,160
Peter, don't you see?
348
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:49,037
We got to make you
the hero again.
349
00:13:49,037 --> 00:13:50,288
Wait, say that again.
350
00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:52,332
We got to make you
the hero again.
351
00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:54,000
Yep, yeah, you got weird teeth.
352
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,544
Wait. What did you say before
about the hero thing?
353
00:13:56,544 --> 00:13:58,546
I said we've got to make Peter
the hero...
354
00:13:58,546 --> 00:14:00,215
You're right.
He does have weird teeth.
355
00:14:00,215 --> 00:14:03,259
I just have to show Lois
I can still be her hero.
356
00:14:03,259 --> 00:14:05,220
[muffled]
That's exactly
what I was saying.
357
00:14:05,220 --> 00:14:08,098
[loud dance music playing]
358
00:14:13,228 --> 00:14:15,230
Brian, you made it.
359
00:14:15,230 --> 00:14:18,066
Aw, damn it,
I love this son of a bitch.
360
00:14:18,066 --> 00:14:19,943
Are you... are you drunk?
361
00:14:19,943 --> 00:14:22,028
Nah, I just spun around
a few times.
362
00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:24,197
Stewie, it's-it's really loud.
363
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:25,615
Oh, that's all Guy, man.
364
00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:28,076
His speakers aren't even
legal in America.
365
00:14:28,076 --> 00:14:30,537
Stewie, you were supposed to be
in bed at 7:50.
366
00:14:30,537 --> 00:14:33,415
The only clock we have in here
says "Miller Time."
367
00:14:33,415 --> 00:14:36,001
Come on, Brian, this could be
the greatest night of our lives,
368
00:14:36,001 --> 00:14:39,045
but you're all, "Stewie's too
little to have a mini fridge."
369
00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:41,047
What happened to the Brian
I used to know?
370
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:42,674
[dance music continues louder]
371
00:14:47,554 --> 00:14:49,180
You know what? You're right.
372
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:50,974
I guess I was just worried
about your safety.
373
00:14:50,974 --> 00:14:52,142
But what the hell.
374
00:14:52,142 --> 00:14:54,102
I can party with
the best of them, even Guy.
375
00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:55,437
There you go.
376
00:14:55,437 --> 00:14:57,605
What's the worst that could
happen, right? Check it.
377
00:14:57,605 --> 00:14:59,482
Guy put his speakers
out the window,
378
00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:01,026
and he's cranking Wagner.
379
00:15:01,026 --> 00:15:02,986
Everybody's like, "What?!"
380
00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:05,780
["Ride of the Valkyries"
playing over speakers]
381
00:15:05,780 --> 00:15:07,866
♪ ♪
382
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:19,502
You know, I don't know why
I let you talk me into
383
00:15:19,502 --> 00:15:20,837
coming back down here.
384
00:15:20,837 --> 00:15:23,757
Because in your heart,
you know I love you, Lois.
385
00:15:23,757 --> 00:15:25,800
And because,
as Chris Daughtry says,
386
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,844
I'll try to do it right
this time.
387
00:15:27,844 --> 00:15:29,137
It's not over.
388
00:15:29,137 --> 00:15:31,306
- Hmm. Daughtry says it better.
- I agree.
389
00:15:31,306 --> 00:15:33,433
- [phone beeps]
- Hi, Lois.
390
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,352
Your husband Peter
wanted me to tell you
391
00:15:35,352 --> 00:15:37,812
he'll try to do it right
this time, and...
392
00:15:37,812 --> 00:15:41,316
♪ It's not over. ♪
393
00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:44,444
Also, you may want to remind him
that his Venmo did not work,
394
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:47,739
and we're gonna need to find
an alternative form of payment.
395
00:15:47,739 --> 00:15:48,865
[gasps]
396
00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:50,825
Oh, if he was wearing
that straw hat,
397
00:15:50,825 --> 00:15:52,660
I would've wet myself.
398
00:15:52,660 --> 00:15:54,829
♪ ♪
399
00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:56,956
Oh, he's got her. [laughs]
400
00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,751
The Daughtry thing worked, Quagmire.
401
00:15:59,751 --> 00:16:01,169
Of course it did.
402
00:16:01,169 --> 00:16:04,422
Sometimes I suffer under
the weight of my own genius.
403
00:16:05,548 --> 00:16:06,841
We're all set.
404
00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,968
This is gonna work
as long as Peter remembers
405
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,388
to have Lois
step on the 18th plank.
406
00:16:12,430 --> 00:16:14,265
18th plank. 18th plank.
407
00:16:14,265 --> 00:16:15,725
Eighteen. Eighteen.
408
00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:17,477
Oh, I wonder if
Daughtry's coming to
409
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:19,562
the Quahog Amphitheater
this season.
410
00:16:19,562 --> 00:16:23,608
Let's see, Blink-182,
Twenty One Pilots,
411
00:16:23,608 --> 00:16:25,694
Thirty Seconds to Mars...
412
00:16:25,694 --> 00:16:27,696
182, 21, 30.
413
00:16:27,696 --> 00:16:29,114
10,000 Maniacs?
414
00:16:29,114 --> 00:16:31,783
Geez, how old is
Natalie Merchant now? 60?
415
00:16:31,783 --> 00:16:33,535
10,000, 60.
416
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:35,662
Look, Lois, I'll take you
to every one of those shows
417
00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:38,164
if you just stop saying numbers
and get on the damn pier.
418
00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:41,418
Uh, I-I mean,
after you, my queen.
419
00:16:43,795 --> 00:16:45,422
♪ ♪
420
00:16:56,975 --> 00:16:58,893
Uh, no, no. Wrong plank.
Not there.
421
00:16:58,893 --> 00:17:00,311
- Huh?
- No, it's nothing.
422
00:17:00,311 --> 00:17:02,022
I just think you were
supposed to step here.
423
00:17:02,022 --> 00:17:03,314
[grunts]
424
00:17:06,943 --> 00:17:09,362
What the hell?
Peter, are you okay?
425
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:11,031
Uh, don't worry, Lois.
426
00:17:11,031 --> 00:17:13,533
I'll protect you
if there's any sharks around.
427
00:17:14,743 --> 00:17:17,412
I said, if there's
any sharks around.
428
00:17:17,412 --> 00:17:19,789
{\an8}Peter, I'm not ready.
I lost one of my flippers.
429
00:17:19,789 --> 00:17:21,082
What do you mean,
you're not ready?
430
00:17:21,082 --> 00:17:22,500
It's not gonna work
without a shark.
431
00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:24,085
Oh, don't worry,
there's one right there.
432
00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:27,922
♪ ♪
433
00:17:27,922 --> 00:17:29,215
Oh, phew.
434
00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:30,550
[screaming]
435
00:17:40,018 --> 00:17:41,019
[farts]
436
00:17:41,728 --> 00:17:44,356
[screaming]
437
00:17:53,031 --> 00:17:55,283
[both screaming]
438
00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:58,787
Thank God.
439
00:17:58,787 --> 00:17:59,996
Peter, are you all right?
440
00:17:59,996 --> 00:18:02,540
Lois, you saved me.
441
00:18:03,541 --> 00:18:05,418
[panting]
442
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:06,795
[gasps, chokes]
443
00:18:09,881 --> 00:18:12,592
Peter, did you rig
this whole thing
444
00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:14,302
so that I would fall
into the water?
445
00:18:14,302 --> 00:18:16,179
Yes.
446
00:18:16,179 --> 00:18:18,556
I guess now you're
really mad at me, huh?
447
00:18:18,556 --> 00:18:21,101
You know what? I'm not.
448
00:18:21,101 --> 00:18:23,436
Because I just realized
something, Peter.
449
00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:25,563
I do have an alpha in my life,
450
00:18:25,563 --> 00:18:29,067
someone to stand up
and take charge, and it's me.
451
00:18:29,067 --> 00:18:30,527
It's always been me.
452
00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:32,862
And I will never again
look outside of myself
453
00:18:32,862 --> 00:18:35,407
for happiness, validation
or anything.
454
00:18:35,407 --> 00:18:38,952
And you, you helped me
see this, Peter. Thank you.
455
00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:40,578
Okay.
456
00:18:40,578 --> 00:18:42,414
And you're sure you're not mad?
457
00:18:42,414 --> 00:18:45,709
Oh, no, Peter, I'm not mad.
458
00:18:45,709 --> 00:18:48,628
I'm horny. Hornier than
I've been in a long time.
459
00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:51,673
Now, get those pants off,
you fat little bag of dirt.
460
00:18:51,673 --> 00:18:53,049
Oh.
461
00:18:53,049 --> 00:18:55,427
[growling playfully]
462
00:18:55,427 --> 00:18:56,678
[laughing nervously]
463
00:18:56,678 --> 00:18:58,179
[growling playfully]
464
00:18:58,179 --> 00:18:59,639
Happy anniversary?
465
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:01,850
I didn't say you could talk!
466
00:19:01,850 --> 00:19:04,310
But happy anniversary, Peter.
467
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,104
[moaning]
468
00:19:08,773 --> 00:19:10,692
This is awesome.
469
00:19:10,692 --> 00:19:13,611
You know, for a fat guy,
Peter's got a tiny ass.
470
00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:16,156
Perfectly separated popcorn, anyone?
471
00:19:17,699 --> 00:19:19,492
This is good.
Where'd you get it?
472
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,578
An elder abuse victim
sent it to the station
473
00:19:21,578 --> 00:19:24,748
as a thank-you
for arresting her grandson.
474
00:19:24,748 --> 00:19:26,791
I'm just glad something good
came out of it.
475
00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:37,135
[giggling, moaning]
476
00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:42,849
Don't be late for work,
now, Peter.
477
00:19:42,849 --> 00:19:45,560
- Yah!
- Ooh! Ow. Fresh.
478
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:47,354
See you tonight.
479
00:19:47,354 --> 00:19:49,105
It's good to see you two
getting along.
480
00:19:49,105 --> 00:19:51,191
Oh, yeah. Our marriage
will be just fine
481
00:19:51,191 --> 00:19:53,735
as long as Peter remembers
that I am everything
482
00:19:53,735 --> 00:19:55,111
and he is nothing.
483
00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:56,488
Is Stewie still sleeping?
484
00:19:56,488 --> 00:19:58,615
Probably. He was up
pretty late last night.
485
00:19:58,615 --> 00:20:00,617
I'll go check on him.
486
00:20:00,617 --> 00:20:02,494
Stewie, you up?
487
00:20:02,494 --> 00:20:03,787
That was some...
488
00:20:03,787 --> 00:20:05,872
♪ ♪
489
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:11,878
Oh, my God!
490
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:13,505
Damn it, Stewie, I told you
491
00:20:13,505 --> 00:20:15,465
you were too little
to have a fridge in your room.
492
00:20:15,465 --> 00:20:19,094
[sobbing]
Oh... Oh, God.
493
00:20:19,094 --> 00:20:21,680
[sobbing continues]
494
00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:24,724
["Midnight, the Stars and You"
playing]