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♪ ♪
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- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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♪ ♪
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(BELL TOLLING)
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(HORSE NEIGHING)
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Lovely day for a walk, eh, Holmes?
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Yes, just look at our great
city, bustling with activity.
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Even the chimney sweeps
are hard at work.
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JEFFREY: It's all dirty in here.
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I don't care. Keep going.
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Shouldn't I wear
some sort of protective suit?
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Why? Don't you trust me?
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I do, but our friend Bartholomew
went in lots of chimneys
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in the '80s, and now he's sick.
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Holmes, there's something
I have to tell you.
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- I'm getting married...
- I deduce, Watson,
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- that you're getting married.
- I just said that.
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Yes, but I had deduced it first.
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That's what happened.
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So, congratulations.
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Thank you.
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I thought you might be upset
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because we won't be able
to solve mysteries...
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Solve mysteries together.
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Elementary.
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Crown Jewels stolen!
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"Another one bites the dust,"
says Queen.
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And coming up, Russia and Prussia
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still named basically the same thing.
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Ghastly. Who would have
the audacity to steal the crown
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off the queen's head?
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Only one man, Watson.
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Professor Moriarty,
the Napoleon of Crime.
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I've had him on the run for a year now.
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His criminal empire is in shambles,
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but he won't go quietly.
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I say, look, there's hotshot
20-year-old comedian
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Benjamin Hill.
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("YAKETY SAX" PLAYING)
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Oh. That'll be funnier
when he's older and slower.
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(HORN BLOWING)
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Watson, this is the boat to America.
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How do you know that?
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Because Neil Diamond is on board. Look.
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♪ September morn ♪
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♪ We danced until the night
became a brand-new day... ♪
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I really hoped
he'd be singing "America."
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Well, how will we know who Moriarty is?
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We've never seen him before.
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The science of deduction.
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Hold it right there, Professor Moriarty.
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Sherlock Holmes?
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How did you know it was me?
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When I see a man
about to go on a sea voyage
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and not wearing a topcoat,
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with no watch fob, and whose
spats are not fully buttoned...
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And the jewels hanging out of my hat?
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Yeah, and the jewels
hanging out of your hat.
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He's got a gun.
Look out, Stew... Holmes!
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God, this is gonna be so annoying.
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Watson, the scepter!
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Aah! Lucky shot.
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There was no luck involved.
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From the angle you were aiming the gun,
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I extrapolated the path of the bullet,
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and triangulated the deflection point...
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Uh, is this... is this speech for me?
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Because he's dead.
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For the court's amusement,
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we now present Sir William of Cosby.
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Well, you see, the children
of today are wearing
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their pantaloons so low, gazoozle,
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you can see the first three
layers of their undergarments,
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zazzle, zoozle.
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(SNORING)
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I get away with this
for another 122 years, you see.
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Hello, Your Majesty, I have
recovered the Crown Jewels.
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Mum, may I say, it's been
a pleasure serving you,
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but I've decided to retire.
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We are losing interest
in this conversation.
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It would be a wonderful cap on
my career to have a knighthood.
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Come, come, now, Holmes, you're not...
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(SNORING)
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COSBY: Sometimes the bigger ladies
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take a little longer, you see.
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Really, Holmes, why retire?
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There will still be crimes to solve.
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But with Moriarty gone,
and with you, my biographer,
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leaving me for marriage,
there is little point.
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Just gonna toss it in the old waste bin.
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Yup. Good-bye, detective cap.
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Yeah.
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And you, old chap, are about
to solve the biggest mystery
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facing men of our time:
The wedding night.
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I know, I'm just, I'm just giddy
with anticipation.
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Lifting her nightgown,
nightshirt, evening cape,
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boudoir coverall, torso doily,
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and the various corsets
and trusses below.
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Exposing her shame to God,
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followed by brief missionary
coitus with no eye contact.
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And then, five months later,
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a stillborn child
the size of a digestive biscuit.
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(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
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Constance.
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John.
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- Hey.
- 'Sup?
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So, my betrothed,
how go the wedding plans?
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Oh, John, my father
is sparing no expense.
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Boiled beef for every guest,
fish head stew, old cheese,
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and men's attire will be provided
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by Gentlemen's Wearhouse.
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You're gonna fancy the way
you look, this I vouchsafe.
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What is it, Holmes?
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It's an urgent missive
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from Inspector Lestrade
of Scotland Yard.
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Oh, darn, there's been a murder
and he's begging for my help.
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Oh, darn, darn, darn,
this is embarrassing.
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Now I've got to see if I can
dig that hat out of the trash.
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Come, Watson, the game is afoot.
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"Afoot"?
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"Starting," "beginning."
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Well, then just say that.
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Enjoying all the old-timey jokes?
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Don't worry, next week,
back to a normal episode.
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Hmm, this is most curious.
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It appears she was killed by our
old nemesis, the Scottish Brute.
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That's impossible, he's in prison.
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I put him there myself one year ago.
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Nevertheless,
we can't ignore the evidence.
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All his victims were prostitutes
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whose names began with the letter "V."
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This one's name is Veronica,
as evidenced
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by this satin softball jacket
that bears her name.
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These threads are from
a Scotsman's plaid kilt.
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The telltale locks of red hair.
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But most significantly,
the Scottish Brute replaced
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his victims' intestines with bagpipes.
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(BAGPIPE PLAYING)
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Want to give it a whirl?
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("HEART AND SOUL" PLAYING)
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How could he accomplish
this murder from prison?
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He couldn't.
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There are only
two possible explanations:
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Either there's a murderer who has copied
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the Scottish Brute's methods,
or I put the wrong man away.
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(PEOPLE SHOUTING, GASPING)
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(GROWLS)
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(LAUGHTER)
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What are you in for?
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Ah, I Rathboned somebody's Cumberbatch.
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(LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE)
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Well, well, well.
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If it ain't me old nemesis,
Sherlock Holmes.
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Hello, Brute, I've got
some questions for you.
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Who did you tell about the murders?
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Nae a soul, 'cause I dinna
commit no murders.
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I'm innocent, you nosy parker.
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How can I believe you?
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You're a common criminal.
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All the prostitutes were killed
by a left-handed assailant.
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- So?
- So, I was born with...
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two right hands.
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- (BOTH GASP)
- Dear God.
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That means he couldn't
have been the killer.
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That's right. You ever seen
a man with two right hand...
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Oh, this... this thing was open.
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That shouldn't be open, right?
168
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No, no, I wouldn't think so.
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[STREET NOISE]
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[DING]
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I hope you will accept
my sincere apologies.
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Oh, you've done more than
made up for it, Mr. Holmes.
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I'm just happy to be free.
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Ah, the world's changed
since I've been in there.
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That puddle wasn't here.
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That cloud wasn't there.
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That window was open.
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That lady was four feet that way.
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All right, well, I hope
you make a go of it.
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Good luck with your fresh start.
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PETER: Oh, where'd that bird come from?
182
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That's new.
183
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Watson, I found
some important new clues.
184
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These red locks of hair
I found at the crime scene?
185
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They don't belong to the Scottish Brute.
186
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They belong to a woman.
187
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How can you tell?
188
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It's hard to explain, Watson.
189
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Women are mysterious.
190
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But don't ask me.
191
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Ask contemporary personality
Oscar Wilde.
192
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I prefer a man with a future
and a woman with a past.
193
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(LAUGHING): Oh, splendid.
194
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Well said, splendid.
195
00:09:13,805 --> 00:09:15,673
All right, let's get out of here
before we're all arrested
196
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for the crime of "bum-fancy."
197
00:09:20,846 --> 00:09:25,416
And now I will disguise myself
as a prostitute named Valerie.
198
00:09:25,417 --> 00:09:26,817
What the devil is that?
199
00:09:26,818 --> 00:09:28,052
It's my own invention.
200
00:09:28,053 --> 00:09:30,187
A steam-driven mechanical exoskeleton.
201
00:09:30,188 --> 00:09:31,488
Observe.
202
00:09:33,158 --> 00:09:34,824
(WHIRRING)
203
00:09:36,228 --> 00:09:39,430
It's cutting-edge technology, Watson!
204
00:09:39,431 --> 00:09:41,031
ROBOTIC FEMALE VOICE: Exchange money
205
00:09:41,032 --> 00:09:43,067
for sexual services, guv'nor.
206
00:09:43,068 --> 00:09:44,135
Are you a bobby?
207
00:09:44,136 --> 00:09:45,236
You have to tell me.
208
00:09:45,237 --> 00:09:46,504
Mind the gap.
209
00:09:46,505 --> 00:09:47,938
Astounding.
210
00:09:47,939 --> 00:09:50,274
Yes. Now, I'll stroll around the block,
211
00:09:50,275 --> 00:09:53,444
and you'll proposition me, loud
enough so the killer can hear.
212
00:09:53,445 --> 00:09:54,912
Love for sale.
213
00:09:54,913 --> 00:09:57,515
Appetizing young love for sale.
214
00:09:57,516 --> 00:09:59,817
♪ Love that's fresh
and still unspoiled ♪
215
00:09:59,818 --> 00:10:02,253
♪ Love that's only slightly soiled... ♪
216
00:10:02,254 --> 00:10:03,387
Love for sale.
217
00:10:03,388 --> 00:10:04,555
Lookin' good, honey.
218
00:10:04,556 --> 00:10:05,656
STEWIE: No blacks.
219
00:10:05,657 --> 00:10:07,057
Love for sale.
220
00:10:07,058 --> 00:10:09,692
Race-contingent love for sale.
221
00:10:16,434 --> 00:10:19,537
Did I hear your name was Valerie?
222
00:10:19,538 --> 00:10:20,771
Yeah, guv'nor.
223
00:10:20,772 --> 00:10:21,939
Uh, have we met?
224
00:10:21,940 --> 00:10:24,240
Your voice sounds very familiar.
225
00:10:29,481 --> 00:10:31,714
- (GASPS)
- (GRUNTING)
226
00:10:33,051 --> 00:10:34,652
What the hell is this?
227
00:10:34,653 --> 00:10:35,853
STEWIE: Watson, hurry!
228
00:10:35,854 --> 00:10:37,087
Watson?
229
00:10:37,088 --> 00:10:38,656
Oh, my God, Sherlock!
230
00:10:38,657 --> 00:10:41,559
ROBOTIC FEMALE VOICE: Watson, help.
231
00:10:41,560 --> 00:10:43,326
(DISTORTED): Watson.
232
00:10:45,363 --> 00:10:49,200
All I would've done
is be a perfect gentleman.
233
00:10:49,201 --> 00:10:50,868
Sorry, got distracted.
234
00:10:50,869 --> 00:10:52,970
Lot of rats in London.
235
00:10:52,971 --> 00:10:54,437
That's for you.
236
00:10:58,210 --> 00:11:00,077
Sorry we didn't
catch the murderer, Holmes.
237
00:11:00,078 --> 00:11:02,112
And I'm afraid you'll
have to catch her without me.
238
00:11:02,113 --> 00:11:03,414
My wedding is tomorrow.
239
00:11:03,415 --> 00:11:05,082
Yes, about that, you know,
I was thinking.
240
00:11:05,083 --> 00:11:07,184
Maybe you should put that off
for a little while.
241
00:11:07,185 --> 00:11:09,320
You know, sow a few more wild oats.
242
00:11:09,321 --> 00:11:10,955
Oh, I've done enough of that, my friend,
243
00:11:10,956 --> 00:11:13,157
especially after that
raucous bachelor party trip
244
00:11:13,158 --> 00:11:15,024
you threw for me in Las Vegas.
245
00:11:17,696 --> 00:11:20,097
So... when do the strippers arrive?
246
00:11:20,098 --> 00:11:22,333
1952.
247
00:11:22,334 --> 00:11:25,369
Watson, I don't know
how to tell you this...
248
00:11:25,370 --> 00:11:28,005
but the murderer
we've been looking for...
249
00:11:28,006 --> 00:11:29,773
it's your fiancée, Constance.
250
00:11:29,774 --> 00:11:31,875
You lie! You're just jealous!
251
00:11:31,876 --> 00:11:33,978
Well, let's go to her place
and I'll show you.
252
00:11:33,979 --> 00:11:36,947
Sorry, today was y'all's cleaning day.
253
00:11:36,948 --> 00:11:38,782
Y'all want me to come back later?
254
00:11:38,783 --> 00:11:40,117
M-Maybe, maybe, yeah.
255
00:11:40,118 --> 00:11:41,518
M-Maybe, maybe another day.
256
00:11:41,519 --> 00:11:43,153
JEFFREY: That's fine, I'll pull out.
257
00:11:43,154 --> 00:11:45,990
Just go easy,
it really hurt on the way in.
258
00:11:45,991 --> 00:11:48,692
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
259
00:11:48,693 --> 00:11:50,627
(QUIETER): Ow! Ow! Ow!
260
00:11:54,933 --> 00:11:58,202
Constance? Are you here?
261
00:11:58,203 --> 00:12:01,105
She's... she's gone.
262
00:12:01,106 --> 00:12:03,040
I'm sorry, Watson. Unfortunately,
263
00:12:03,041 --> 00:12:05,175
it appears my deductions were correct.
264
00:12:05,176 --> 00:12:07,278
Not so fast. Look, she left a note.
265
00:12:07,279 --> 00:12:09,179
See, Holmes? It says here...
266
00:12:09,180 --> 00:12:11,915
these are test results.
She has gonorrhea.
267
00:12:11,916 --> 00:12:13,350
(SIGHS): I...
268
00:12:13,351 --> 00:12:15,019
I can't believe it.
269
00:12:15,020 --> 00:12:17,221
My beloved Constance is the murderer.
270
00:12:17,222 --> 00:12:18,789
It's even worse than you think.
271
00:12:18,790 --> 00:12:21,125
If she's a murderer
from this time period,
272
00:12:21,126 --> 00:12:23,694
that means there will be
a terrible, pretentious musical
273
00:12:23,695 --> 00:12:25,329
about her one day.
274
00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:27,731
♪ ♪
275
00:12:27,732 --> 00:12:30,301
♪ Behold the tale of Constance ♪
276
00:12:30,302 --> 00:12:32,836
♪ The murderer in the bonnet ♪
277
00:12:32,837 --> 00:12:36,707
♪ The murderer in the bonnet. ♪
278
00:12:36,708 --> 00:12:39,043
Oh, I was wrong, I love it.
279
00:12:39,044 --> 00:12:40,377
ENGLISH ANNOUNCER:
Will Watson and Holmes
280
00:12:40,378 --> 00:12:41,845
track down Constance?
281
00:12:41,846 --> 00:12:43,147
We'll be right back
282
00:12:43,148 --> 00:12:45,449
after these
turn of the century messages.
283
00:12:45,450 --> 00:12:49,286
(SIGHS) Another dull night
at the gentlemen's club.
284
00:12:49,287 --> 00:12:51,989
What we need is
some room temperature gin.
285
00:12:51,990 --> 00:12:53,424
'Ello, gents.
286
00:12:53,425 --> 00:12:55,659
Fancy some Room Temperature Gin?
287
00:12:55,660 --> 00:12:57,061
Shut up, you slag!
288
00:12:57,062 --> 00:12:58,495
No women allowed.
289
00:12:58,496 --> 00:13:00,197
ENGLISH ANNOUNCER: Room Temperature Gin:
290
00:13:00,198 --> 00:13:01,465
Drink it without women,
291
00:13:01,466 --> 00:13:03,266
have an eel pie, then go to bed.
292
00:13:06,071 --> 00:13:09,132
♪
293
00:13:09,133 --> 00:13:12,102
Constance had the tickets
for our honeymoon to Paris.
294
00:13:12,103 --> 00:13:14,004
No doubt she'll be using those
for her escape.
295
00:13:14,005 --> 00:13:15,705
Very well. Then we're off to France.
296
00:13:15,706 --> 00:13:18,175
That's right. We're off to Gay Paree.
297
00:13:18,176 --> 00:13:20,010
- What's this now?
- Gay Paree.
298
00:13:20,011 --> 00:13:21,511
Some... some people call it "Gay Paree."
299
00:13:21,512 --> 00:13:23,913
Oh, then I suppose I should change.
300
00:13:25,950 --> 00:13:29,786
Let's get separate rooms just so
we can spread our stuff out.
301
00:13:29,787 --> 00:13:31,754
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
302
00:13:36,827 --> 00:13:38,328
Quick, we've got to catch the train!
303
00:13:38,329 --> 00:13:40,329
Porter!
304
00:13:42,166 --> 00:13:43,900
Watson, do you have thruppence
for the porter?
305
00:13:43,901 --> 00:13:45,068
I have tuppence.
306
00:13:45,069 --> 00:13:46,203
So you don't have thruppence?
307
00:13:46,204 --> 00:13:47,904
I have tuppence. How much do you have?
308
00:13:47,905 --> 00:13:49,072
I have nuppence.
309
00:13:49,073 --> 00:13:50,807
You're gonna get a comeuppance.
310
00:13:50,808 --> 00:13:53,677
♪ ♪
311
00:13:53,678 --> 00:13:55,644
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
312
00:13:57,014 --> 00:13:59,783
Excuse me, sir, what's the next
stop for this train?
313
00:13:59,784 --> 00:14:01,651
(BABBLING)
314
00:14:01,652 --> 00:14:04,654
Ugh, I hate when they let
the infirm ride on the train.
315
00:14:04,655 --> 00:14:08,558
Next stop, (BABBLING) Station.
316
00:14:08,559 --> 00:14:12,028
Sir, you owe an apology to me
and all the good people
317
00:14:12,029 --> 00:14:15,498
of (BABBLING).
318
00:14:15,499 --> 00:14:19,069
It's nice of the locals to act
as their own train crossings.
319
00:14:19,070 --> 00:14:22,037
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding,
ding, ding, ding, ding.
320
00:14:28,512 --> 00:14:30,513
♪ ♪
321
00:14:30,514 --> 00:14:32,515
You know, I've never crossed
the English Channel before.
322
00:14:32,516 --> 00:14:34,251
I hope no one from the train
is on this boat.
323
00:14:34,252 --> 00:14:35,418
I'm wearing the same outfit.
324
00:14:35,419 --> 00:14:36,786
I wouldn't worry.
325
00:14:36,787 --> 00:14:39,189
Looks like it's just a bunch
of minor celebrities.
326
00:14:39,190 --> 00:14:41,190
("LOVE BOAT THEME" PLAYING)
327
00:14:48,966 --> 00:14:50,766
♪ Love ♪
328
00:14:52,703 --> 00:14:56,740
♪ Exciting and new ♪
329
00:14:56,741 --> 00:14:58,208
♪ Come aboard. ♪
330
00:14:58,209 --> 00:15:00,142
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
331
00:15:04,215 --> 00:15:06,182
Finally, Paris.
332
00:15:06,183 --> 00:15:07,884
What an ordeal.
333
00:15:07,885 --> 00:15:09,219
Yes, but how do we find Constance
334
00:15:09,220 --> 00:15:10,387
in one of the biggest cities...
335
00:15:10,388 --> 00:15:11,688
There she is.
336
00:15:13,257 --> 00:15:14,858
Quick, after her. We have to chase her
337
00:15:14,859 --> 00:15:16,393
through a series of shots where she has
338
00:15:16,394 --> 00:15:18,728
an inconsistent lead on us.
339
00:15:18,729 --> 00:15:21,297
♪ ♪
340
00:15:46,290 --> 00:15:47,457
This way, Holmes.
341
00:15:47,458 --> 00:15:49,225
She's heading towards... Holmes?
342
00:15:49,226 --> 00:15:51,728
I couldn't come here and not do this.
343
00:15:51,729 --> 00:15:54,063
She has appendicitis, by the way.
344
00:15:59,270 --> 00:16:00,670
She must have gone up
this strange building.
345
00:16:00,671 --> 00:16:01,805
What is it?
346
00:16:01,806 --> 00:16:03,239
It's the brand-new Eiffel Tower.
347
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:04,507
Well, let's hurry.
348
00:16:04,508 --> 00:16:06,142
- She's getting...
- Oh, oh, hold on, hold on.
349
00:16:06,143 --> 00:16:07,477
I think we may have just photobombed
350
00:16:07,478 --> 00:16:08,778
that family's picture.
351
00:16:13,351 --> 00:16:16,719
♪ ♪
352
00:16:25,830 --> 00:16:27,664
You'll never catch me.
353
00:16:27,665 --> 00:16:29,165
(SHOUTS)
354
00:16:29,166 --> 00:16:31,300
Damn it, my heel is caught. (GRUNTS)
355
00:16:32,269 --> 00:16:34,170
(SHOUTS)
356
00:16:34,171 --> 00:16:35,471
Constance!
357
00:16:36,607 --> 00:16:37,774
Hang on, my darling.
358
00:16:37,775 --> 00:16:41,111
John, I did it for him.
359
00:16:41,112 --> 00:16:43,146
And you didn't mean to hurt me?
360
00:16:43,147 --> 00:16:45,348
No, you're not getting what I'm saying.
361
00:16:45,349 --> 00:16:47,684
I didn't care about you at all.
362
00:16:47,685 --> 00:16:49,119
Who did you do this for?
363
00:16:49,120 --> 00:16:51,621
Why were you killing prostitutes
with the initial "V"?
364
00:16:51,622 --> 00:16:52,956
(LAUGHS)
365
00:16:52,957 --> 00:16:54,858
The great Sherlock Holmes.
366
00:16:54,859 --> 00:16:56,860
He said you'd never figure it out,
367
00:16:56,861 --> 00:16:59,162
and that he'd be victorious.
368
00:16:59,163 --> 00:17:00,363
(LAUGHS)
369
00:17:00,364 --> 00:17:03,032
(SCREAMS)
370
00:17:03,033 --> 00:17:04,200
Constance!
371
00:17:04,201 --> 00:17:05,701
(THUMPS)
372
00:17:08,205 --> 00:17:11,508
Ugh. Depardieu!
373
00:17:11,509 --> 00:17:13,475
(CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
374
00:17:17,014 --> 00:17:20,016
I can't believe she's gone, Holmes.
375
00:17:20,017 --> 00:17:21,418
Oh, you'll find someone.
376
00:17:21,419 --> 00:17:23,153
You're a good guy with a great body.
377
00:17:23,154 --> 00:17:24,821
I still don't understand what she meant
378
00:17:24,822 --> 00:17:27,190
by "he said you'd never
figure it out, and..."
379
00:17:27,191 --> 00:17:28,691
"That he'd be victorious."
380
00:17:28,692 --> 00:17:30,360
Watson, that's it.
381
00:17:30,361 --> 00:17:32,162
Didn't think I'd figure it out.
382
00:17:32,163 --> 00:17:35,565
This calls for the old Sherlock
Holmes celebratory smoke.
383
00:17:35,566 --> 00:17:37,032
I'll just light my pipe.
384
00:17:40,337 --> 00:17:42,338
(THUNDER CRASHES)
385
00:17:42,339 --> 00:17:44,306
(WIND HOWLING)
386
00:17:59,857 --> 00:18:01,958
What is the meaning of this?
387
00:18:01,959 --> 00:18:03,960
I'll be replacing your innards
388
00:18:03,961 --> 00:18:06,229
with these bagpipes, Queen Victoria.
389
00:18:06,230 --> 00:18:09,132
Not before we put you in jail.
390
00:18:09,133 --> 00:18:10,333
What's with this "we" crap?
391
00:18:10,334 --> 00:18:11,468
It's just you.
392
00:18:11,469 --> 00:18:15,371
Oh, no, it's "we."
393
00:18:15,372 --> 00:18:16,472
(GASPS)
394
00:18:16,473 --> 00:18:18,675
We made it just in time.
395
00:18:18,676 --> 00:18:21,978
And I was able to fool you,
as I am a master of disguise.
396
00:18:21,979 --> 00:18:24,547
Seems like you're just good
at dressing up like a woman.
397
00:18:24,548 --> 00:18:26,449
Ah, you caught me, Mr. Holmes.
398
00:18:26,450 --> 00:18:28,585
I suppose it's back to jail for me.
399
00:18:28,586 --> 00:18:32,121
You can dispense with the act,
Professor Moriarty.
400
00:18:32,122 --> 00:18:33,456
Holmes, what are you talking about?
401
00:18:33,457 --> 00:18:35,091
Moriarty's dead. You killed him.
402
00:18:35,092 --> 00:18:37,026
No, that was one of his lackeys.
403
00:18:37,027 --> 00:18:38,962
Isn't that right, Professor?
404
00:18:38,963 --> 00:18:40,763
(NORMAL VOICE): Very clever, Holmes.
405
00:18:40,764 --> 00:18:42,298
What gave me away?
406
00:18:42,299 --> 00:18:45,602
Constance. She said
that you'd be victorious.
407
00:18:45,603 --> 00:18:47,136
That was the vital clue
408
00:18:47,137 --> 00:18:49,572
that these murders were for my benefit.
409
00:18:49,573 --> 00:18:51,908
I was dismantling your criminal empire,
410
00:18:51,909 --> 00:18:53,408
and you wanted revenge.
411
00:19:01,619 --> 00:19:04,387
You cannot catch what you cannot see.
412
00:19:04,388 --> 00:19:07,090
(EVIL LAUGHTER)
413
00:19:07,091 --> 00:19:10,093
STEWIE: So, you concocted
an elaborate series of murders
414
00:19:10,094 --> 00:19:11,194
with clues leading me
415
00:19:11,195 --> 00:19:13,263
to the fictional Scottish Brute.
416
00:19:13,264 --> 00:19:15,598
Meanwhile, two toothless,
British homeless people
417
00:19:15,599 --> 00:19:17,467
had filthy sex in an alleyway.
418
00:19:17,468 --> 00:19:19,002
They would become the grandparents
419
00:19:19,003 --> 00:19:20,569
of the guys from Oasis.
420
00:19:23,173 --> 00:19:25,108
Meanwhile, you had your girlfriend
421
00:19:25,109 --> 00:19:26,608
seduce my best friend.
422
00:19:32,449 --> 00:19:34,216
She arranges for me
to kill your imposter...
423
00:19:35,352 --> 00:19:37,921
and commits an identical murder
424
00:19:37,922 --> 00:19:40,890
so I would come
to the inescapable conclusion
425
00:19:40,891 --> 00:19:42,559
that I put the wrong man away.
426
00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:44,627
Constance would lead us
away from England
427
00:19:44,628 --> 00:19:46,829
while you killed the last "prostitute"
428
00:19:46,830 --> 00:19:48,131
with the name "V."
429
00:19:48,132 --> 00:19:49,966
And I'd get the blame
for freeing the man
430
00:19:49,967 --> 00:19:51,834
who killed our beloved queen.
431
00:19:51,835 --> 00:19:53,069
Brilliant.
432
00:19:53,070 --> 00:19:55,238
Why do you think
Queen Victoria's a prostitute?
433
00:19:55,239 --> 00:19:57,073
She formed an alliance
with the Dutch royals
434
00:19:57,074 --> 00:19:59,142
for shared control of Guyana.
435
00:19:59,143 --> 00:20:00,810
So... political.
436
00:20:00,811 --> 00:20:02,912
One last mystery to solve.
437
00:20:02,913 --> 00:20:04,847
Why do they call you Professor?
438
00:20:04,848 --> 00:20:06,683
- I teach at Hogwarts.
- Really?
439
00:20:06,684 --> 00:20:09,819
No. But we should've done that
instead of this.
440
00:20:09,820 --> 00:20:12,788
(VIOLIN PLAYING)
441
00:20:13,824 --> 00:20:15,858
Holmes, with this case,
442
00:20:15,859 --> 00:20:17,961
you saved the entire British Empire.
443
00:20:17,962 --> 00:20:20,129
Yes. Now it will last forever.
444
00:20:20,130 --> 00:20:22,231
From South Africa to the Suez Canal,
445
00:20:22,232 --> 00:20:23,933
from Cyprus to Australia,
446
00:20:23,934 --> 00:20:25,802
all of Canada and Grenada,
447
00:20:25,803 --> 00:20:28,571
even Antigua and Jamaica.
448
00:20:28,572 --> 00:20:30,473
India, Jordan, Kenya, Kuwait,
449
00:20:30,474 --> 00:20:32,508
Malawi, Bermuda, the Falklands.
450
00:20:32,509 --> 00:20:34,710
Yes, all part of our empire.
451
00:20:36,513 --> 00:20:37,814
I'll always miss...
452
00:20:37,815 --> 00:20:39,082
The Maldives, Myanmar,
453
00:20:39,083 --> 00:20:41,050
New Zealand, Nigeria, Pakistan.
454
00:20:41,051 --> 00:20:42,785
Saint Kitts and Nevis.
455
00:20:42,786 --> 00:20:44,754
Sri Lanka, the Sudan, Uganda,
456
00:20:44,755 --> 00:20:46,422
and the United Arab Emirates.
457
00:20:46,423 --> 00:20:48,358
BRIAN: God, England sucks now.
458
00:20:48,359 --> 00:20:50,325
(VIOLIN PLAYING FAMILY GUY THEME)
459
00:20:51,325 --> 00:20:54,825
- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
- www.addic7ed.com -