1 00:00:05,450 --> 00:00:15,450 Family Guy 7x06 - Tales of a Third Grade Nothing 2 00:00:15,950 --> 00:00:25,950 Timing: Razzzma Script: reaper http://FamilyGuyRussia.com/ 3 00:00:30,949 --> 00:00:32,949 [Pawtucket brewery] 4 00:00:35,750 --> 00:00:39,100 Griffin, I need you to run this shipping report upstairs to the CEO. 5 00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:42,140 Huh? There's nothing fun or entertaining about that. 6 00:00:42,750 --> 00:00:45,540 Maybe if I walk down the hall with the wisecracking Rebe. 7 00:00:45,970 --> 00:00:47,740 Do you charge a lot for your circumcisions? 8 00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:49,650 No, I just keep the tips. 9 00:00:51,100 --> 00:00:52,760 All right, where's the CEO office. 10 00:00:53,259 --> 00:00:54,259 [Executive bathroom] 11 00:00:54,260 --> 00:00:57,480 Yeah, I always wanted to sit inside of the executive bathroom. 12 00:01:02,400 --> 00:01:03,770 Executive bathroom, sir? 13 00:01:04,760 --> 00:01:05,310 Uh-- Yes. 14 00:01:05,430 --> 00:01:06,130 Right this way. 15 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:19,460 So, eh-- Where is this executive bathroom? 16 00:01:19,750 --> 00:01:20,650 There! 17 00:01:38,090 --> 00:01:41,550 Welcome to Executive Bathroom Island! 18 00:01:43,239 --> 00:01:45,939 [Executive Bathroom Island] 19 00:01:48,240 --> 00:01:49,470 Well, this is peaceful. 20 00:01:53,460 --> 00:01:54,410 Good morning, Lois. 21 00:01:54,550 --> 00:01:57,300 Wow, Peter, since when do you get such dressed up for work? 22 00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:00,090 Since I got tired of getting nowhere in this world, Lois. 23 00:02:00,310 --> 00:02:03,230 I have decided to do whatever it takes to becoming executive. 24 00:02:03,340 --> 00:02:05,840 Well, it would certainly be great if you got a promotion. 25 00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:08,420 You'd earn more money, get better health insurance. 26 00:02:08,610 --> 00:02:10,610 Lois, I am doing this for the bathroom. 27 00:02:10,900 --> 00:02:14,460 And I'm not giving up on my dream like I did with that indoor hot air balloon. 28 00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:20,450 And away we go. 29 00:02:28,130 --> 00:02:31,340 No, no, no, no, no, noooo. 30 00:02:31,740 --> 00:02:34,670 - I can't feel my legs! - Welcome to the party, pal. 31 00:02:34,830 --> 00:02:36,670 - No, wait, here they are. - Uh-- 32 00:02:36,670 --> 00:02:38,670 [Quahog Cabana] [Tonight: Franck Sinatra Jr.] 33 00:02:38,938 --> 00:02:41,545 Call it hell, call it heaven 34 00:02:41,646 --> 00:02:44,117 It's a probable twelve to seven 35 00:02:44,203 --> 00:02:48,136 that the guy's only doing it for some doll 36 00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:50,005 some doll! some doll! 37 00:02:50,091 --> 00:02:57,656 the guy's only doing it for some do-o-o-oll 38 00:03:00,390 --> 00:03:02,660 Boy, it sure is great to have you back in town, Franck. 39 00:03:02,740 --> 00:03:04,400 Yeah, but this place is dead. 40 00:03:04,640 --> 00:03:06,120 I don't know, that one guy seem to like it. 41 00:03:06,530 --> 00:03:09,390 I like everything. Including ginger ale. 42 00:03:09,630 --> 00:03:12,600 Pssst. That's my way of ordering a ginger ale. 43 00:03:13,890 --> 00:03:16,600 Sorry, I can't pay you more, guys, but business has been bad. 44 00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:18,130 I'm actually looking to sell the joint. 45 00:03:18,390 --> 00:03:21,870 Oh, you can't sell this place. So few clubs play real music anymore. 46 00:03:22,030 --> 00:03:24,000 Well, you wanna buy it? I'll give you a good deal. 47 00:03:24,230 --> 00:03:25,910 You know, that's not a bad idea. 48 00:03:26,050 --> 00:03:28,020 Yeah, we could really turn this place around. 49 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:30,770 If we play our cards right, this could be bigger than the Appolo Theater. 50 00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:36,740 All right now, next up we get the comedy style, it's Kim Li Song, give it up. 51 00:03:37,680 --> 00:03:38,720 How you doing tonight? 52 00:03:38,970 --> 00:03:41,910 So, you ever noticed when two black guys coming into your convinient store 53 00:03:42,020 --> 00:03:43,970 and one go one way and one go the other way? 54 00:03:44,220 --> 00:03:46,700 What they doing? What they stealing? Who with me? 55 00:03:46,850 --> 00:03:48,820 W-o-o-o-o 56 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:52,600 You stay out of my store! All you stay out of my store! I remember your face! 57 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:54,600 [Pawtucket brewery] 58 00:03:56,070 --> 00:03:57,430 Peter, I want you to retype those-- 59 00:03:57,940 --> 00:04:00,590 Wow! What is this? Have you been cleaning? 60 00:04:00,750 --> 00:04:02,940 Yep! I'm working extra hard, so you'll promote me. 61 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:06,970 Well, based on your track record you'll understand if I have trouble believing you. 62 00:04:07,070 --> 00:04:09,900 Believe it, Angela, I hate being just a cargo around here. 63 00:04:10,240 --> 00:04:12,890 Almost as much as I hate homeless people asking me for money. 64 00:04:13,820 --> 00:04:15,640 - Spare some change. - Sure. 65 00:04:16,730 --> 00:04:18,250 You didn't put anything in there. 66 00:04:18,480 --> 00:04:20,530 Yes I did. I put hope in there. 67 00:04:21,510 --> 00:04:21,700 Hope. 68 00:04:22,670 --> 00:04:24,350 Don't spend it all in one place, raggie. 69 00:04:24,350 --> 00:04:26,350 [Pawtucket brewery] 70 00:04:28,230 --> 00:04:30,090 Griffin, what the hell is this? 71 00:04:30,190 --> 00:04:32,720 It's a robot that I built to save this company money. 72 00:04:32,820 --> 00:04:33,820 Now, before you say anything, 73 00:04:34,180 --> 00:04:36,040 one, it has no human emotions, 74 00:04:36,210 --> 00:04:39,490 and two, its prime directive is never to harm people. 75 00:04:39,830 --> 00:04:41,650 Oh god! It's harming people. 76 00:04:41,870 --> 00:04:43,930 Angry! Angry! 77 00:04:43,990 --> 00:04:45,930 Oh god! It's got human emotions too. 78 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:51,410 It's using tools. It's learning, Angela, it's learning. Run! 79 00:04:53,010 --> 00:04:54,410 [Pawtucket brewery] 80 00:04:55,210 --> 00:04:56,230 What are you want, Griffin? 81 00:04:56,410 --> 00:04:57,660 Angela, look out your window. 82 00:04:57,900 --> 00:05:00,790 You see that Anheuser Busch billborad next to the children's hospital? 83 00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:02,520 Well, watch this. 84 00:05:04,700 --> 00:05:05,330 Oh god! 85 00:05:06,560 --> 00:05:08,740 Oh my god, this is horrible. 86 00:05:08,790 --> 00:05:11,300 Oh god! Oh that's terrible. 87 00:05:11,860 --> 00:05:14,090 Oh, good lord, save them. Bless the-- 88 00:05:14,310 --> 00:05:17,800 Aw, oka, okay, yeah! Here we go! Now, everything worked out. 89 00:05:22,010 --> 00:05:22,650 Stewie, guess what. 90 00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:26,460 Franck and I just closed the deal to buy the Quahog Cabana club. 91 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:29,480 Oh, well, Brian, what else are you doing such terrible and stupid? 92 00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:32,910 Just wait, in a few weeks that club will be the hottest spot in Quahog. 93 00:05:33,120 --> 00:05:34,520 Huh, you're deluting yourself. 94 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:38,300 You're gonna fail faster than John Maddens wedding video business. 95 00:05:38,439 --> 00:05:39,739 [Mike and Stacy's Wedding] 96 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:42,620 Boom, here's your groom over here. 97 00:05:42,700 --> 00:05:44,500 Boom, you got your bride right here. 98 00:05:44,790 --> 00:05:47,260 A lot of people says Stacy's no good 99 00:05:47,260 --> 00:05:48,990 and she slept with this guy 100 00:05:49,090 --> 00:05:50,290 and then that guy, 101 00:05:50,460 --> 00:05:51,410 and even this guy. 102 00:05:51,620 --> 00:05:54,940 Well, tell you something, that experience's gonna work in her favor later in the game. 103 00:05:55,250 --> 00:05:57,870 You know, what a hack of a wedding? Brad Farve. 104 00:05:57,870 --> 00:05:59,870 [Pawtucket brewery] 105 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:03,730 Griffin, I've got good news. 106 00:06:03,970 --> 00:06:06,130 Our management level position has become available 107 00:06:06,130 --> 00:06:08,870 and I've seen that you've been working very hard lately. 108 00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:10,880 I'm recommending you for a promotion. 109 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:14,050 - Ah, and I could use the executive bathroom? - Of course. 110 00:06:14,380 --> 00:06:17,630 Holy crap! You know, last week I ate a fortune cookie and it said 111 00:06:17,630 --> 00:06:20,260 "Obvious lesbian will bring great news" 112 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:23,210 And also said "A great piano will fall on me". 113 00:06:26,340 --> 00:06:27,750 Well-- Good day to you. 114 00:06:28,060 --> 00:06:29,310 And I will, um-- 115 00:06:30,380 --> 00:06:32,190 Yeah, I mean, we're-- we're done. 116 00:06:33,320 --> 00:06:35,950 Just eh-- squeeze by you here. 117 00:06:35,950 --> 00:06:37,950 [Pawtucket brewery] 118 00:06:38,519 --> 00:06:39,019 [Human resources] 119 00:06:40,220 --> 00:06:43,190 Hi, is this where I get the poop pass to use the executive bathroom? 120 00:06:43,420 --> 00:06:45,190 Sit down, mr. Griffin. We need to talk. 121 00:06:45,340 --> 00:06:47,590 Okay, well, make it fast, 'cause I'm starting to crown. 122 00:06:47,750 --> 00:06:51,120 Mr. Griffin, all our executives require a high school education. 123 00:06:51,350 --> 00:06:54,330 And your file says that you never passed the third grade. 124 00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:57,210 If you want this promotion, you're going to have to go back and finish. 125 00:06:57,490 --> 00:07:00,570 Well, that sounds hilarious but it also sounds like it might take a while. 126 00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:02,170 I'm afraid that's your only option. 127 00:07:02,380 --> 00:07:04,670 Well, I mean, if that's what I got to do, then I guess I-- 128 00:07:08,700 --> 00:07:11,940 Next time you got a fortune cookie don't open it. 129 00:07:23,300 --> 00:07:25,190 Bye, you guys, have fun at school. 130 00:07:25,350 --> 00:07:26,680 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 131 00:07:26,870 --> 00:07:28,420 Oh, Peter, stop pouting. 132 00:07:28,650 --> 00:07:31,900 All you got to do is finish third grade and you'll get that promotion. 133 00:07:32,610 --> 00:07:36,810 Grrr, this is gonna be the bigger pain in the ass than getting into "Last Clap" contest with Cleveland. 134 00:07:37,250 --> 00:07:40,290 Ladies and gentlemen, the Quahog mens chorus. 135 00:07:48,950 --> 00:07:52,230 Hey, hey, hey! Clap one more time, you're not coming to my birthday. 136 00:07:53,660 --> 00:07:54,780 - Who did that? - Giggity. 137 00:07:55,289 --> 00:07:57,789 [Martin Mull elementary] 138 00:07:58,390 --> 00:08:01,470 Good morning, class. Starting today we have a new student. 139 00:08:02,020 --> 00:08:04,630 Peter, would you like to introduce yourself? 140 00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:06,510 Hi, my name's Peter Griffin, um-- 141 00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:10,380 I was actually in third grade a long time ago but I've never finished. 142 00:08:10,690 --> 00:08:12,840 Back then we had a teacher named mrs. Wilson. 143 00:08:13,230 --> 00:08:15,750 Except-- Except we had this funny little nickname for her. 144 00:08:15,910 --> 00:08:19,060 We called her mrs. Killson. 'Cause she had an abortion. 145 00:08:19,350 --> 00:08:22,320 I know, I know, it's kinda silly but we were-- You know, we were just a bunch of kids. 146 00:08:22,430 --> 00:08:24,270 I'm sorry, go ahead, mrs.-- uh-- 147 00:08:24,670 --> 00:08:26,990 Wilson. Thank you, Peter. 148 00:08:27,210 --> 00:08:29,620 Why don't you sit over there, next to Omar? 149 00:08:31,170 --> 00:08:32,810 Omar is our top student 150 00:08:33,030 --> 00:08:36,860 and we're hoping he'll lead us to victory next week in the district "Spelling Bee". 151 00:08:37,580 --> 00:08:40,980 What are you doing in our class? You're old. Are you stupid or something? 152 00:08:41,140 --> 00:08:42,690 Aw, picking on a new kid, huh? 153 00:08:42,980 --> 00:08:45,510 Well, at least my parents didn't name me Gaymar. 154 00:08:47,100 --> 00:08:50,500 Wow! I never knew you can make fun of someone for being homosexual. 155 00:08:50,620 --> 00:08:52,970 And by laughing at other people's sexuality 156 00:08:53,130 --> 00:08:54,970 somehow I feel better of it at my own. 157 00:08:55,359 --> 00:08:57,259 [Quahog Cabana] [Grand re-opening] 158 00:09:02,460 --> 00:09:04,080 Hey, Brian, where are all the people? 159 00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:05,960 They'll be here, Franck. We just got to give them time. 160 00:09:06,620 --> 00:09:08,990 And wouldn't you know it, there's our first customer. 161 00:09:09,410 --> 00:09:11,360 I'll entertain him while we wait for more to arrive. 162 00:09:12,310 --> 00:09:14,300 So, thanks for coming. How are you doing tonight? 163 00:09:14,450 --> 00:09:16,300 Good. 164 00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:17,990 Glad to hear it. Any requests? 165 00:09:18,130 --> 00:09:20,780 Play on the dark side 166 00:09:20,780 --> 00:09:24,120 like John Cafferty and the Beaver Brown Band. 167 00:09:24,450 --> 00:09:28,500 Give it up, Brian, noone wants to go to a stupid big band club anymore. 168 00:09:29,020 --> 00:09:32,760 You know, I could help you make some changes around here that would bring in customers. 169 00:09:32,970 --> 00:09:35,470 You know, Brian, we should give Stewie a shot. It can't hurt. 170 00:09:35,890 --> 00:09:37,870 Well, what do you have in mind? 171 00:09:37,990 --> 00:09:40,370 Just trust me, Brian, I know exactly what to do. 172 00:09:40,550 --> 00:09:41,600 You've got to be aggressive. 173 00:09:41,770 --> 00:09:45,820 Even more aggressive than Michael Jackson's treatment of his own groin on stage. 174 00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:05,330 Thank you. 175 00:10:05,330 --> 00:10:07,330 [Martin Mull elementary] 176 00:10:09,250 --> 00:10:12,140 All right, Suzie. What have you brought in for Show and Tell? 177 00:10:12,370 --> 00:10:15,620 This is my Malibu Barbie doll that I got for Christmas this year. 178 00:10:15,730 --> 00:10:19,570 She comes with a hairbrush, a pocketbook and two different dresses. 179 00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:23,310 Oh my god! Who the hell cares? 180 00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:26,530 Peter, I would like to remind you that you are in a classroom. 181 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:28,010 Not for long. 182 00:10:31,190 --> 00:10:32,200 Can I help you, sir? 183 00:10:32,410 --> 00:10:36,260 Hi there, my name's Glenn Griffin. Um, I'm here to pick up my son Peter for a ball ga-- 184 00:10:36,510 --> 00:10:37,530 Uh, doctor's appointment. 185 00:10:37,730 --> 00:10:39,920 - Peter is your son? - That is affirmative. 186 00:10:40,110 --> 00:10:42,730 Because you look a lot more like that child over there. 187 00:10:43,770 --> 00:10:45,240 - Daddy? - Oh god! 188 00:10:48,660 --> 00:10:50,750 - Daady? - Oh god! 189 00:10:54,010 --> 00:10:55,480 - Papa? - Oh god! 190 00:10:57,900 --> 00:11:00,580 - Hey, there are no kids in here, right? - No, just me. 191 00:11:00,750 --> 00:11:01,520 Oh, thank god! 192 00:11:02,640 --> 00:11:03,910 You wanna have unprotected sex? 193 00:11:07,269 --> 00:11:09,369 [pLace] 194 00:11:20,470 --> 00:11:22,630 What the hell did Stewie do to this place? 195 00:11:22,760 --> 00:11:25,490 Hey, get a load of Meaner J. Cribbs(?) over here 196 00:11:25,490 --> 00:11:27,490 he's rubbing the records with his hand. 197 00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:30,080 Hey! Hey! You gonna ruin that, you know. 198 00:11:30,510 --> 00:11:32,680 He-hey, there they are. 199 00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:35,300 Stewie, what is all this? What did you do to the Cabana Club? 200 00:11:35,610 --> 00:11:39,600 Ew, we don't call it the Cabana Club anymore, Franck. It's now called pLace. 201 00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:40,930 Little P, big L. 202 00:11:41,150 --> 00:11:44,520 Congratulations! You two now own the hottest spot in town. 203 00:11:44,690 --> 00:11:48,190 Wow, that's a lot of people. I hope we have enough rhye(?). 204 00:11:48,490 --> 00:11:49,590 How'd you pay for all this? 205 00:11:49,590 --> 00:11:52,750 I got a job as a field reporter for Channel 5 News. 206 00:11:52,820 --> 00:11:54,750 And all the juice is being collected underneath? 207 00:11:54,870 --> 00:11:57,640 Yes. And whoever collects the most is gonna win a free weekend 208 00:11:57,640 --> 00:12:01,410 here in the chateau with interhational food and wine tastings. 209 00:12:01,170 --> 00:12:01,920 Stop! 210 00:12:12,210 --> 00:12:13,260 Oh, I can't breathe. 211 00:12:13,460 --> 00:12:14,080 I can't breathe. 212 00:12:17,690 --> 00:12:19,550 Oh, gosh, I-- I hope he's all right. 213 00:12:19,690 --> 00:12:21,720 Well, we'll have to send someone to make sure that he is. 214 00:12:21,720 --> 00:12:23,720 [Martin Mull elementary] 215 00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:29,670 - Hey, Omar, want a Hurt's donut? - Um-- Okay. 216 00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:31,490 Hurts donut. 217 00:12:32,630 --> 00:12:33,530 Dumbass. 218 00:12:33,740 --> 00:12:37,290 Wow, he effectively silenced Omar by hitting him in the face. 219 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:41,390 My dad hits me but I bet, if I hit others, the pain stops. 220 00:12:41,470 --> 00:12:43,840 Someday I'll use what I've learned here on my wife. 221 00:12:44,380 --> 00:12:46,210 Peter, is this your homework? 222 00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:48,840 Eh, hold on, let me take out my reading glasses. 223 00:12:49,549 --> 00:12:50,649 [Homework is for buttlickers] 224 00:12:52,250 --> 00:12:53,040 Yeah, that's mine. 225 00:12:53,350 --> 00:12:54,550 I could flank you for this. 226 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:57,540 But buttlickers is three syllable word. 227 00:12:57,820 --> 00:12:59,850 Not even Omar can spell those. 228 00:13:00,140 --> 00:13:03,420 So, you're joining him at next weeks districts "Spelling Bee". 229 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:07,560 I you'll lead our school to victory, I'll let you pass third grade. 230 00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:09,500 But if you lose, you fail. 231 00:13:09,820 --> 00:13:11,440 I accept that challenge. 232 00:13:11,670 --> 00:13:14,400 Light 70's Bruce Jenner, take me home. 233 00:13:14,750 --> 00:13:15,620 Hup on, Peter. 234 00:13:31,460 --> 00:13:34,770 So, Brian, how is it feel to own the coolest club in Quahog? 235 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:36,650 You think this is cool? Look at these people. 236 00:13:36,970 --> 00:13:40,050 I'd rather go bankrupt than cater to pretentious jerks like this. 237 00:13:40,140 --> 00:13:42,330 Wow, Brian, slow down, man. 238 00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:46,610 We're making money now and besides this place ain't no bad. 239 00:13:47,060 --> 00:13:50,960 Hey, you girls thirsty? Could I interest you in a couple of Rob Roys? 240 00:13:50,990 --> 00:13:52,180 What's a Rob Roy? 241 00:13:52,310 --> 00:13:55,260 Only V drink of Mr. Peter Lawford. 242 00:13:55,330 --> 00:13:56,700 Who's Peter Lawford? 243 00:13:56,700 --> 00:13:58,780 What am I hitting on Lou Costello here? 244 00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:00,620 Who's Lou Costello? 245 00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:03,510 Uh, sorry, my-- my friend's a little new at the club scene. 246 00:14:04,550 --> 00:14:07,050 Geez, what the hell's with this broads(?)? 247 00:14:07,130 --> 00:14:09,660 Look at you two, taxes in the night club? 248 00:14:09,780 --> 00:14:13,200 Got, you're more out of place than Prince was on Price's right. 249 00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:15,690 And what's your bid on the dining room said, Prince? 250 00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:16,620 Three-fifty. 251 00:14:16,860 --> 00:14:18,300 - I'm sorry? - Three-- 252 00:14:18,680 --> 00:14:20,050 Can you speak up, please. 253 00:14:20,240 --> 00:14:21,220 Three-fifty. 254 00:14:21,520 --> 00:14:25,590 All right and the actual retail price of the dining room said is 255 00:14:25,900 --> 00:14:28,860 - three hundred fifty dollars. - Yeeeah. 256 00:14:33,850 --> 00:14:34,700 Peter, wake up! 257 00:14:37,020 --> 00:14:39,200 Oh, Lois, I've just had a weirdest dream 258 00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:43,790 that Louis Black told jokes that was so funny he had to shout them so everyone could hear. 259 00:14:43,980 --> 00:14:46,930 Peter, you got to stay awake, the Spelling Bee's tomorrow. 260 00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:51,070 But, Lois, I'm ascared, there's no way I can compete against other kids. 261 00:14:51,430 --> 00:14:55,830 This like trained a Beach Shpoople champion Fiorg Wanderplug get a game a shpoople. 262 00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:06,410 Shpoople! 263 00:15:08,930 --> 00:15:12,200 Don't be said, Paiter. That's why they call it shpoople. 264 00:15:15,490 --> 00:15:16,810 God, we look like idiots. 265 00:15:16,930 --> 00:15:20,070 He-hey, that's more like it. Where'd you get the threads? 266 00:15:20,110 --> 00:15:24,330 We went to Barney's, I heared that's where all the famous people shop for skinny leg jeans. 267 00:15:26,070 --> 00:15:28,660 These are the thightest penis-compressing and 268 00:15:28,660 --> 00:15:31,700 sperm-killing and testicles-grippinest jeans I ever tried on. 269 00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:35,110 Brian, Franck, meet Dakota and New Bedford. 270 00:15:35,150 --> 00:15:38,420 - Hey, how is it hanging, Dakota? - What's up, New Bedford? 271 00:15:38,420 --> 00:15:42,560 You look like rappers but you're not black so that's the perfect 'em out of danger. 272 00:15:42,970 --> 00:15:44,780 God, hell. You guys get to know each other. 273 00:15:44,780 --> 00:15:47,250 Looks like my doormate let another gazelle in there. 274 00:15:48,500 --> 00:15:51,860 I'm sorry but we've been over this before. We don't serve your kind here. 275 00:15:52,010 --> 00:15:53,500 You're gonna hear from my lawyer. 276 00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:55,230 Yeah! You know, I would welcome that. 277 00:15:55,260 --> 00:15:58,900 I would welcome the opportunity to hear from a lawyer that represents a gazelle. 278 00:15:59,170 --> 00:15:59,850 What's his name? 279 00:16:00,820 --> 00:16:02,070 Yeah, I don't have a lawyer. 280 00:16:05,330 --> 00:16:07,320 And I'll tell you something about Dean Martin. 281 00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:11,280 He was the only guy on the golf course who had a five iron with the cork on the end of it. 282 00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:17,650 So, who wants to come back to hotel and take a wack at my genitals? 283 00:16:17,650 --> 00:16:18,990 - Cool! - Awesome! 284 00:16:19,090 --> 00:16:20,700 All right, we got a ball game. 285 00:16:21,090 --> 00:16:23,400 Hang on, girls, I'll get you a couple of appletinies. 286 00:16:23,930 --> 00:16:27,000 This is going great, Franck! This club and this closes 287 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,020 My god, there's nothing that could stop us. 288 00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:33,630 Hey, party people, I'm ready to get 86 289 00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:36,130 - Andy Dick! - Oh, no! 290 00:16:36,250 --> 00:16:37,520 C'mon, let's get out of here. 291 00:16:42,050 --> 00:16:45,250 - What the hell just happened? - Andy Dick happened. 292 00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:49,740 As soon as that guy shows up anyplace, it gets a worse rapped than John Wilkes Booth. 293 00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:56,270 Stupid hat, damn it. 294 00:16:56,630 --> 00:16:58,430 I paid fifteen cents for this ticket. 295 00:17:00,530 --> 00:17:01,580 No, he didn't. 296 00:17:01,790 --> 00:17:04,360 God! Could he be anymore annoying? 297 00:17:06,180 --> 00:17:07,210 Ah, hey, stop! 298 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:09,730 Tomme-e-e-e, ha-ha-ha. 299 00:17:09,870 --> 00:17:11,850 Hey, here, you took that black chick home? 300 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:14,620 Hey, hey, you're welcome, ha-ha-ha. 301 00:17:16,349 --> 00:17:18,549 [Quahog Civic Center] [District Spelling Bee] 302 00:17:20,550 --> 00:17:22,500 Our next spelling bee contestant is 303 00:17:22,860 --> 00:17:27,200 Omar Maha-- Jarif-- Faa 304 00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:28,890 Something september-eleventy. 305 00:17:29,040 --> 00:17:31,280 All right, Omar, your word is candy. 306 00:17:31,690 --> 00:17:34,500 Candy: C-A-N-D-Y. 307 00:17:34,760 --> 00:17:35,310 Candy. 308 00:17:35,420 --> 00:17:36,060 That's correct. 309 00:17:36,200 --> 00:17:38,640 Our next contestant is Peter Griffin. 310 00:17:39,740 --> 00:17:41,830 Peter, your word is tree. 311 00:17:42,060 --> 00:17:43,440 Can you use it in a sentence, please? 312 00:17:43,620 --> 00:17:45,380 There's a tree by the lake. 313 00:17:46,100 --> 00:17:48,420 Huh-- Can you use it in a dirty sentence? 314 00:17:48,620 --> 00:17:51,330 I like to bring transient hookers to the old oak-tree 315 00:17:51,330 --> 00:17:55,170 where I asphyxiate myself at the same time I watch them having sex with each other. 316 00:17:55,610 --> 00:17:56,710 T-R-E-E 317 00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:57,880 - Tree. - Correct. 318 00:18:01,750 --> 00:18:03,800 We're now down to our final two competitors. 319 00:18:04,050 --> 00:18:06,240 Peter Griffin and Omar NorthTower. 320 00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:09,060 Omar, you'll be going first. Your word is-- 321 00:18:09,350 --> 00:18:10,610 coagulate 322 00:18:11,110 --> 00:18:11,930 C-- 323 00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:13,180 O-- 324 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:15,180 A-G 325 00:18:16,530 --> 00:18:17,080 A-- 326 00:18:17,760 --> 00:18:21,010 Oh, I'm sorry, Omar. But you could spell buckscutter. 327 00:18:21,390 --> 00:18:23,650 I'm nine years old and I'm indian. 328 00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:29,240 All right, Peter, if you spell your next word correctly, you'll win the competition. 329 00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:33,020 Your word is-- lesbians. 330 00:18:33,300 --> 00:18:34,350 Can you use it in the sentence? 331 00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:37,090 The two lesbians are going shopping. 332 00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:38,490 Can you use it in a dirty sentence? 333 00:18:38,596 --> 00:18:42,400 The two lesbians are going shopping for double sided marade(?) leads. 334 00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:43,090 Damn. 335 00:18:48,220 --> 00:18:50,650 Wait! Can you use it in a labelist sentence? 336 00:18:50,820 --> 00:18:53,590 Gillian Anderson and Helen Hunt are lesbians. 337 00:18:53,850 --> 00:18:55,860 - L-E-S-B-I-A-N-S - Correct! 338 00:18:57,680 --> 00:18:59,780 I did it, Lois. My god, I did it. 339 00:19:00,010 --> 00:19:02,870 You sure did, Peter, I'm so proud of you. 340 00:19:02,900 --> 00:19:04,270 Way to go, dad. 341 00:19:04,390 --> 00:19:06,000 Yeah, you're a smart fella, dad. 342 00:19:06,170 --> 00:19:07,440 And you're a fart smeller, Meg. 343 00:19:10,430 --> 00:19:12,330 Let's go home. 344 00:19:12,730 --> 00:19:14,730 [Pawtucket brewery] 345 00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:18,390 Angela, I did it, I finished the third grade. 346 00:19:18,590 --> 00:19:19,910 I'm ready for my promotion. 347 00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:24,090 Griffin, you blew up a children's hospital, you're going to jail. 348 00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:24,570 What? 349 00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:27,140 What, you think, everyone just forgot about that? 350 00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:30,850 There was an investigation, fingerprints, forensic reports. 351 00:19:31,120 --> 00:19:33,640 Nineteen childred died, Peter. 352 00:19:33,930 --> 00:19:36,280 And the FBI knows it was you. 353 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:41,050 Mr. Griffin, this court finds you guilty. 354 00:19:41,270 --> 00:19:43,910 and sentences you to seven days in prison. 355 00:19:44,450 --> 00:19:46,180 You'll be out next sunday at nine. 356 00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:57,860 God! I can't believe we bought this ridiculous clothes for a club that didn't even last. 357 00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:02,600 Hey, come on, we had a great seventy-two hour run and in this business that's all you can ask for. 358 00:20:02,900 --> 00:20:06,980 Besides, I've already opened a new club that's even more exclusive than this one. 359 00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:08,080 Really? Where is it? 360 00:20:08,310 --> 00:20:11,540 Brian, it's so exclusive that it doesn't even have a location. 361 00:20:12,060 --> 00:20:13,870 It's in here, human heart. 362 00:20:14,930 --> 00:20:16,810 I think that's a beat we can all done, Stu. 363 00:20:17,140 --> 00:20:19,590 Wow, I weirdly feel a lot better. 364 00:20:19,980 --> 00:20:23,110 Hey, Brian, what do you say, we sing Stewie some real music? 365 00:20:23,230 --> 00:20:24,400 Sounds good to me. 366 00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:35,940 On the western side of Quahog 367 00:20:36,190 --> 00:20:39,430 if you care to come along 368 00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:43,040 there's a club that's so exclusive 369 00:20:43,510 --> 00:20:46,490 that a line is ten miles long 370 00:20:46,890 --> 00:20:49,980 Where the douchebags come to party 371 00:20:50,390 --> 00:20:53,500 and to spend their fathers cash 372 00:20:53,910 --> 00:20:57,020 just to take home slutty women 373 00:20:57,600 --> 00:21:00,430 and then wake up with the rash 374 00:21:01,120 --> 00:21:05,550 yeah, they wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up with a rash 375 00:21:07,740 --> 00:21:10,860 Take me out to pLace tonight 376 00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:14,430 where the ...(?) keep our tight 377 00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:18,400 and the guys in hooded sweatshirts 378 00:21:18,790 --> 00:21:21,670 have forgotten that they're white 379 00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:25,380 Take me out to pLace tonight 380 00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:29,030 where there ain't no sell you(?) light 381 00:21:29,230 --> 00:21:34,170 and we'll drink ourselfs insane until we're feeling 382 00:21:36,170 --> 00:21:39,670 Dynamite 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net