1 00:00:01,393 --> 00:00:04,745 ♪ It seems today that all you see ♪ 2 00:00:04,897 --> 00:00:07,822 ♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪ 3 00:00:07,991 --> 00:00:11,677 ♪ But where are those good old-fashioned values ♪ 4 00:00:11,828 --> 00:00:14,680 ♪ On which we used to rely? ♪ 5 00:00:14,831 --> 00:00:18,166 ♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪ 6 00:00:18,185 --> 00:00:21,336 ♪ Lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪ 7 00:00:21,430 --> 00:00:23,080 ♪ All the things that make us ♪ 8 00:00:23,098 --> 00:00:24,339 ♪ Laugh and cry ♪ 9 00:00:24,433 --> 00:00:30,195 ♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪ 10 00:00:31,090 --> 00:00:33,090 ♪ ♪ 11 00:00:34,017 --> 00:00:37,352 Ah, look at this, Peter, a new restaurant in town. 12 00:00:37,446 --> 00:00:39,020 What a lightning bolt to the balls 13 00:00:39,114 --> 00:00:40,873 for a couple of schmoes like us, huh? 14 00:00:41,066 --> 00:00:44,284 I know, I can't believe Quahog finally got a His and Hers. 15 00:00:44,436 --> 00:00:45,952 Check it out: I can drink beer, 16 00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:47,604 watch sports, and play Pop-A-Shot 17 00:00:47,697 --> 00:00:49,456 right here at the table. 18 00:00:49,533 --> 00:00:52,442 And I can drink wine and scroll through Bonnie's Facebook, 19 00:00:52,461 --> 00:00:55,036 secretly enjoying that she has an ugly baby. 20 00:00:55,130 --> 00:00:57,114 (sighs) Look at that thing's eyes. 21 00:00:57,207 --> 00:00:59,874 You know, maybe one glass a night wasn't fine. 22 00:00:59,894 --> 00:01:01,510 Hey, folks. We ready to order? 23 00:01:01,620 --> 00:01:02,452 I think so. 24 00:01:02,546 --> 00:01:03,303 Shall I cover your ears 25 00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:04,955 for your wife's menu questions? 26 00:01:04,973 --> 00:01:06,398 That'd be great. 27 00:01:06,550 --> 00:01:08,625 Yeah, are you able to do the salmon 28 00:01:08,794 --> 00:01:10,235 but without the dill cream? 29 00:01:10,387 --> 00:01:13,388 Sorry, no substitutions. We're a dick restaurant. 30 00:01:13,407 --> 00:01:16,241 Hmm. Then I'll have the fettuccine Alfredo. 31 00:01:16,468 --> 00:01:19,970 And my Instagram will have the watercress salad. 32 00:01:19,988 --> 00:01:20,971 And for you, sir? 33 00:01:21,064 --> 00:01:22,823 How much is that tomahawk rib eye? 34 00:01:22,917 --> 00:01:24,566 -$85... -Kid's personal pan pizza. 35 00:01:24,660 --> 00:01:26,810 Great, and if you folks need anything else, 36 00:01:26,903 --> 00:01:28,995 I'll be invisible. 37 00:01:29,090 --> 00:01:31,298 (video game music plays) 38 00:01:32,334 --> 00:01:35,168 Remember this, Peter? Remember us? 39 00:01:35,321 --> 00:01:38,097 I do remember us. I miss us. 40 00:01:38,248 --> 00:01:41,675 When we get home, let's do it so loud, the kids wake up. 41 00:01:41,769 --> 00:01:45,495 Yeah, let's do it on the couch where we all gather as a family 42 00:01:45,589 --> 00:01:47,589 and watch television. 43 00:01:47,608 --> 00:01:49,833 ANNOUNCER: Family Guy is brought to you by Parent Sex. 44 00:01:49,926 --> 00:01:51,668 Parent Sex: It happens in rooms 45 00:01:51,687 --> 00:01:53,353 that you hang out in and watch TV. 46 00:01:53,505 --> 00:01:55,672 Maybe even right there where you're sitting now. 47 00:01:55,765 --> 00:01:57,674 Pretty gross, right? 48 00:01:57,693 --> 00:02:00,202 (classical music playing) 49 00:02:24,961 --> 00:02:27,729 Gentlemen, we have work to do. 50 00:02:29,057 --> 00:02:31,041 -(saw whirring loudly) -Son of a bitch. 51 00:02:31,134 --> 00:02:34,194 Just when I'm onto something good, really good. 52 00:02:35,472 --> 00:02:37,156 Hey, what the hell's going on out here? 53 00:02:37,383 --> 00:02:38,882 You got a permit, pal? Huh? 54 00:02:38,901 --> 00:02:40,159 Hey, guys, I'll be right back. 55 00:02:40,327 --> 00:02:42,235 I'm just gonna toss this dog a beating real quick. 56 00:02:42,329 --> 00:02:43,236 Wait, what? 57 00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:45,146 Easy there, Gussy, I know this guy. 58 00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:46,648 Why don't you go get yourself a sandwich? 59 00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:49,726 Can-can I leave the wrappers in the bushes? 60 00:02:49,895 --> 00:02:51,819 All right, you can leave the wrappers in the bushes. 61 00:02:51,839 --> 00:02:53,672 Guys, he said we can. 62 00:02:54,750 --> 00:02:55,916 Stewie, what's happening? 63 00:02:56,010 --> 00:02:57,843 I'm trying to write, and all I hear is banging. 64 00:02:57,994 --> 00:02:59,069 Oh, yeah, check it out. 65 00:02:59,238 --> 00:03:01,513 I'm having these guys put up a tree house. 66 00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:06,760 Sort of like a man cave/dance studio kind of deal. 67 00:03:06,912 --> 00:03:09,337 Why don't you stop by later and I'll give you the tour? 68 00:03:09,431 --> 00:03:11,748 -Tell Chris, too. -Sure, I'm free. 69 00:03:11,767 --> 00:03:14,860 -Is that Lois's sweater? -Cardigans are unisex. 70 00:03:15,011 --> 00:03:16,862 ♪ ♪ 71 00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:20,106 So, Loey, how was the big date night? 72 00:03:20,201 --> 00:03:22,367 Wonderful date night. Great, great, great. 73 00:03:22,594 --> 00:03:25,687 Yeah, I'm still not... not completely sold on "Loey." 74 00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:28,022 (chuckling): So, tell us, tell us... 75 00:03:28,191 --> 00:03:31,284 after you had dinner, how was the pork? 76 00:03:31,437 --> 00:03:34,362 (laughing) 77 00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:35,530 Who is this bitch? 78 00:03:35,624 --> 00:03:38,959 Uh, it was good. Yeah, it was really nice. 79 00:03:39,111 --> 00:03:41,035 Oh, no, you're not getting off that easy. 80 00:03:41,129 --> 00:03:45,340 Oh, classic Loey trying to dodge the question. 81 00:03:45,451 --> 00:03:47,226 Seriously, who is this froggy little bitch? 82 00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:48,802 How come she's sitting with us? 83 00:03:48,896 --> 00:03:52,231 Now, about the sex, though, I just... how do I put this? 84 00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:54,791 Let's just say Peter doesn't always... 85 00:03:54,810 --> 00:03:57,552 Munchausen my proxy. 86 00:03:57,604 --> 00:03:58,570 What do you mean? 87 00:03:58,797 --> 00:04:01,389 Well, he doesn't always go to Australia. 88 00:04:01,408 --> 00:04:04,576 You know, the land down under. 89 00:04:04,728 --> 00:04:06,060 ALL: Oh... 90 00:04:06,229 --> 00:04:08,305 He's just never liked it. I don't know. 91 00:04:08,323 --> 00:04:10,082 I-I guess it's not a requirement, 92 00:04:10,233 --> 00:04:12,826 but, yeah, I do like having the option. 93 00:04:12,978 --> 00:04:15,087 You know, Joe and I went to a sex therapist 94 00:04:15,314 --> 00:04:16,571 after his accident. 95 00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:17,905 She really helped us, 96 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,741 turned him into a real spelunker. 97 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:21,093 I'm sorry. 98 00:04:21,262 --> 00:04:23,411 The six-year-old birthday party has asked if you could... 99 00:04:23,580 --> 00:04:25,430 (quietly): keep your voices down. 100 00:04:27,434 --> 00:04:29,726 ♪ ♪ 101 00:04:39,113 --> 00:04:40,837 Oh, there they are. 102 00:04:40,856 --> 00:04:41,780 The boys. 103 00:04:41,931 --> 00:04:43,782 -Come on in, fellas. -Dang, Stewie. 104 00:04:44,009 --> 00:04:46,676 This is a legit little pad you got here. 105 00:04:46,695 --> 00:04:47,619 (floor creaks) 106 00:04:47,771 --> 00:04:49,270 Yeah, that one spot creaks a little. 107 00:04:49,290 --> 00:04:52,182 -I might have them look at it. -Oh, I-I didn't even notice. 108 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:54,275 So, yeah, you know, pretty self-explanatory. 109 00:04:54,295 --> 00:04:57,537 Couch, plasma, kind of a little office nook over there. 110 00:04:57,689 --> 00:04:58,672 And... 111 00:05:01,226 --> 00:05:02,634 -Hey-yo! -Boom. 112 00:05:02,786 --> 00:05:06,212 Photo booth with props, if anyone's feeling sassy. 113 00:05:06,365 --> 00:05:08,956 Eh? Eh? 114 00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:11,310 Um, yes. Yes. 115 00:05:11,495 --> 00:05:13,703 But, uh, do you mind if we take a rain check? 116 00:05:13,722 --> 00:05:16,148 I got to take Chris to baseball in like five minutes. 117 00:05:16,299 --> 00:05:17,316 Well, come by later. 118 00:05:17,467 --> 00:05:18,966 Maybe we can watch a movie or something. 119 00:05:19,061 --> 00:05:21,469 Wow, that's super generous of you, Stewie. 120 00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:23,196 This place is dope. 121 00:05:24,049 --> 00:05:27,117 ♪ ♪ 122 00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:31,888 You see that, Rupert, they like it. 123 00:05:32,057 --> 00:05:36,317 This place might just be my masterpiece. 124 00:05:36,337 --> 00:05:38,078 ♪ ♪ 125 00:05:38,230 --> 00:05:39,338 BRIAN: Okay, wow. 126 00:05:39,489 --> 00:05:41,915 What... the hell... was that? 127 00:05:42,067 --> 00:05:43,900 CHRIS: So we're on the same page? 128 00:05:43,993 --> 00:05:45,660 I thought I was nuts. 129 00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:48,996 -BRIAN: Brutal, right? -CHRIS: Oh, brutal. 130 00:05:49,074 --> 00:05:51,350 BRIAN: I have no idea what he's going for up there. 131 00:05:51,501 --> 00:05:54,686 CHRIS: That's the thing. I don't think he does either. 132 00:05:54,913 --> 00:05:56,388 (Brian and Chris laughing) 133 00:05:56,540 --> 00:05:59,340 CHRIS: I'm sorry, he wants us to come watch a movie up there? 134 00:05:59,434 --> 00:06:01,267 (chuckling): On a Vizio? 135 00:06:01,420 --> 00:06:03,177 Oh, is that what he was saying? 136 00:06:03,197 --> 00:06:05,680 I couldn't hear a word over those floorboards creaking. 137 00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:07,591 Oh, my God. Creak City. 138 00:06:07,684 --> 00:06:11,111 BRIAN: Poor guy. Just has no idea. And, like, nothing to eat? 139 00:06:11,263 --> 00:06:13,113 CHRIS: Like, dude, go to Costco, 140 00:06:13,265 --> 00:06:15,115 grab some of those frozen quiches. 141 00:06:15,209 --> 00:06:17,100 BRIAN: It's not like he didn't know we were coming. 142 00:06:17,193 --> 00:06:20,270 CHRIS: Oh, poor Stewie. what are you gonna do? 143 00:06:20,288 --> 00:06:21,696 BRIAN: I'll tell you what I'm not gonna do. 144 00:06:21,790 --> 00:06:24,031 A photo shoot with a top hat and a boa. 145 00:06:24,126 --> 00:06:26,259 (Brian and Chris laughing) 146 00:06:28,222 --> 00:06:30,263 ♪ ♪ 147 00:06:32,393 --> 00:06:33,633 So, Peter... 148 00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,395 Oh, big surprise. Take her side, why don't you? 149 00:06:36,622 --> 00:06:40,065 Peter, let's take a breath. We're just here to talk. 150 00:06:40,292 --> 00:06:41,641 So, Lois tells me 151 00:06:41,793 --> 00:06:44,694 you don't like doing everything in the bedroom. 152 00:06:46,890 --> 00:06:47,906 (sighs) 153 00:06:48,075 --> 00:06:50,316 Listen, if he's too shy to talk about this, 154 00:06:50,411 --> 00:06:52,727 we could always try hypnosis. 155 00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:54,395 Oh, how would that work? 156 00:06:54,415 --> 00:06:56,990 Well, we get him in a very relaxed state, 157 00:06:57,084 --> 00:06:59,084 and I give him what's called a "trigger phrase." 158 00:06:59,235 --> 00:07:00,493 It's essentially training the brain 159 00:07:00,662 --> 00:07:03,663 to behave a certain way every time he hears it. 160 00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:04,831 You can do that? 161 00:07:04,983 --> 00:07:07,150 Just kind of make me zone out during? 162 00:07:07,169 --> 00:07:08,835 That's the idea, yeah. 163 00:07:08,987 --> 00:07:10,595 Whenever you hear the trigger phrase, 164 00:07:10,822 --> 00:07:13,247 you just imagine yourself sitting on a beach, 165 00:07:13,416 --> 00:07:14,991 eating an ice cream cone. 166 00:07:15,010 --> 00:07:16,176 I don't hate that. 167 00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:18,678 Go ahead and close your eyes for me. 168 00:07:18,830 --> 00:07:22,165 Try to relax. We are now in a tranquil place. 169 00:07:22,334 --> 00:07:27,003 Leaving the cares and concerns of the physical world behind. 170 00:07:27,022 --> 00:07:28,262 Peter, 171 00:07:28,282 --> 00:07:31,007 we are now in our suspended state. 172 00:07:31,176 --> 00:07:33,693 And from now on, whenever you hear the words... 173 00:07:33,845 --> 00:07:35,954 ♪ Extra, extra. ♪ 174 00:07:36,181 --> 00:07:37,956 Sorry, I get push notifications 175 00:07:38,183 --> 00:07:40,125 whenever Chrissy Teigen cyberbullies a nobody. 176 00:07:40,276 --> 00:07:41,609 What was that phrase again? 177 00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:44,688 Vanilla ice cream. 178 00:07:44,781 --> 00:07:46,206 Huh, anything? 179 00:07:46,358 --> 00:07:47,466 Um... 180 00:07:47,617 --> 00:07:49,116 My elbows are itchy? 181 00:07:49,211 --> 00:07:51,452 (sighing): Oh, well, we tried. 182 00:07:51,472 --> 00:07:52,696 Sorry, Lois. 183 00:07:52,864 --> 00:07:55,548 I guess I'll just go make some sad spaghetti. 184 00:07:55,701 --> 00:07:56,808 (sighs) 185 00:07:56,885 --> 00:07:59,060 ♪ Extra, extra. ♪ 186 00:08:00,055 --> 00:08:02,731 (Latin-style music playing) 187 00:08:03,875 --> 00:08:05,466 Corazón. 188 00:08:05,486 --> 00:08:08,653 ♪ ♪ 189 00:08:18,481 --> 00:08:20,457 (music stops) 190 00:08:26,414 --> 00:08:28,715 ♪ ♪ 191 00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:33,345 Peter, last night was amazing. 192 00:08:33,496 --> 00:08:35,454 Oh, when I farted the Pledge of Allegiance? 193 00:08:35,516 --> 00:08:36,681 Yeah, I tell you, 194 00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:38,908 things got a little dicey there on "indivisible." 195 00:08:39,002 --> 00:08:40,593 You really don't remember? 196 00:08:40,687 --> 00:08:42,837 Wow, that hypnosis works. 197 00:08:42,931 --> 00:08:44,523 Well, I got to get in the shower. 198 00:08:44,750 --> 00:08:47,433 You know, 'cause of that "indivisible" part. 199 00:08:47,528 --> 00:08:50,111 ♪ Extra, extra. ♪ 200 00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:57,093 I'm just gonna go ahead and save this song on my phone. 201 00:08:57,186 --> 00:08:59,204 CHRIS: Mom, what's for breakfast? 202 00:08:59,355 --> 00:09:01,264 Shut up, you little turd! 203 00:09:01,266 --> 00:09:03,190 ANNOUNCER: Parent Sex. When your mom yells at you 204 00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:05,602 through a closed door, that's why. 205 00:09:05,771 --> 00:09:07,712 ♪ ♪ 206 00:09:09,775 --> 00:09:11,049 ♪ Extra, extra. ♪ 207 00:09:11,276 --> 00:09:13,126 Wow, Mom and Dad have sure been watching 208 00:09:13,278 --> 00:09:14,961 a lot of entertainment television. 209 00:09:15,055 --> 00:09:16,555 LOIS: Yahtzee! 210 00:09:16,706 --> 00:09:19,616 And apparently found their way to the game closet. 211 00:09:19,618 --> 00:09:22,786 Good morning, everyone. Who's hungry? 212 00:09:22,804 --> 00:09:26,064 Hey, Dad, are you still okay to bring me to Boy Scouts? 213 00:09:26,215 --> 00:09:27,974 Oh, no, is that today? (groans) 214 00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,809 I was hoping to get a little golf in. 215 00:09:29,961 --> 00:09:31,719 I'll tell you what, I'll take Chris. 216 00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:34,631 -You go have fun. -What, really? 217 00:09:34,724 --> 00:09:36,149 Yeah, no biggie. 218 00:09:36,243 --> 00:09:38,743 Just don't forget we have dinner at my parents' house later. 219 00:09:38,895 --> 00:09:39,911 Aw, sweet. 220 00:09:40,063 --> 00:09:42,155 I can't wait to spread ten minutes of fun 221 00:09:42,231 --> 00:09:44,140 over five hours. 222 00:09:44,233 --> 00:09:45,917 Boy, you two seem like you're getting along well 223 00:09:46,069 --> 00:09:47,160 -these days. -(chuckles softly) 224 00:09:47,329 --> 00:09:50,404 -What's that supposed to mean? -Nothing, just... 225 00:09:50,498 --> 00:09:52,924 You don't often give him a whole Saturday to go play golf. 226 00:09:53,151 --> 00:09:56,152 Oh, yeah, is that my idiot dog's opinion? 227 00:09:56,245 --> 00:09:58,154 I-I'm not... I'm not an idiot. 228 00:09:58,173 --> 00:09:59,264 Well, you might not know this 229 00:09:59,491 --> 00:10:01,007 because of the idiot thing, Brian, 230 00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:03,660 but marriage is about give and take. 231 00:10:03,678 --> 00:10:06,496 If my husband wants to go play golf, he plays golf. 232 00:10:06,514 --> 00:10:09,608 I keep him happy, he keeps me happy. 233 00:10:10,927 --> 00:10:11,926 I'm not an idiot. 234 00:10:12,020 --> 00:10:12,944 In fact, I would say... 235 00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:16,005 I would say I'm very smart for a dog. 236 00:10:16,024 --> 00:10:17,264 All right, I'm off. 237 00:10:17,342 --> 00:10:19,008 Thanks again for letting me do this, Lois. 238 00:10:19,027 --> 00:10:20,510 Oh, before you go, can I... 239 00:10:20,528 --> 00:10:23,012 Can I just talk to you upstairs for one minute? 240 00:10:23,031 --> 00:10:25,248 Just... I-I want to ask you something. 241 00:10:26,217 --> 00:10:27,274 ♪ Extra, extra. ♪ 242 00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:30,370 LOIS (laughs): Go fish. 243 00:10:30,522 --> 00:10:32,464 ♪ ♪ 244 00:10:34,117 --> 00:10:36,784 Hey, Stewie, you said you wanted us to see... 245 00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:38,303 Whoa, what happened in here? 246 00:10:38,472 --> 00:10:40,430 ♪ ♪ 247 00:10:42,458 --> 00:10:46,293 Okay. (laughs) Okay, now we're talking. 248 00:10:46,388 --> 00:10:49,814 -Stewie, this is incredible. -Oh, yeah, you like? 249 00:10:49,966 --> 00:10:51,650 The old place just didn't really... 250 00:10:51,877 --> 00:10:53,300 didn't have much of a vibe, you know? 251 00:10:53,378 --> 00:10:56,303 Well, it sure as hell has a vibe now. 252 00:10:56,381 --> 00:10:59,565 Yup, there he is. Nolan Ryan. 253 00:10:59,660 --> 00:11:02,160 Von Ryan's Express. Eh? 254 00:11:02,311 --> 00:11:04,145 Oh, I happened to be over at Costco today 255 00:11:04,222 --> 00:11:05,980 and I grabbed some of these quiches. 256 00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:07,390 You guys ever try these? 257 00:11:07,483 --> 00:11:10,894 Ooh, very cool. Love these things. 258 00:11:10,912 --> 00:11:12,545 Gracias, Stewie. 259 00:11:14,733 --> 00:11:18,176 Yeah, so, you know, added a little workout area. 260 00:11:18,327 --> 00:11:20,679 Oh, I got that creak taken care of, too. 261 00:11:20,830 --> 00:11:22,347 See? Nothing. 262 00:11:22,498 --> 00:11:24,590 Wait, that's not the same TV, right? 263 00:11:24,743 --> 00:11:25,591 Good eye. 264 00:11:25,744 --> 00:11:26,759 Yeah, I looked up Vizios 265 00:11:26,912 --> 00:11:28,411 and realized they're kind of crap. 266 00:11:28,430 --> 00:11:30,263 (inhales) Ended up going with the Sony. 267 00:11:30,415 --> 00:11:32,749 Excellent choice going with the Sony. 268 00:11:32,767 --> 00:11:34,008 Can't go wrong there. 269 00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,418 Well, congratulations, Stewie. 270 00:11:35,511 --> 00:11:37,529 You officially have a kick-ass man cave. 271 00:11:37,756 --> 00:11:39,531 I mean, don't get me wrong, it was great before. 272 00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:40,848 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 273 00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:43,851 But this is, I mean, this is a man cave. 274 00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:46,763 Agree. You know who would love this? 275 00:11:46,781 --> 00:11:47,872 Eric. 276 00:11:47,982 --> 00:11:51,267 Oh, yeah, this is right up Eric's alley. 277 00:11:51,286 --> 00:11:53,269 I mean, would-would you mind if we brought a buddy? 278 00:11:53,438 --> 00:11:55,046 Yeah. Bring Eric, bring whoever. 279 00:11:55,198 --> 00:11:57,440 Eric'll love Stewie, don't you think? 280 00:11:57,459 --> 00:11:59,275 Totally. How have they never met? 281 00:11:59,294 --> 00:12:02,445 A wrong that will soon be righted, my friend. 282 00:12:02,464 --> 00:12:04,614 All right, Stewie, we'll see you later. 283 00:12:04,707 --> 00:12:05,465 Yeah, yeah. 284 00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:06,558 See you guys in a bit. 285 00:12:06,709 --> 00:12:08,435 Peace, brah. 286 00:12:10,305 --> 00:12:14,381 BRIAN (laughs): Wow, it's all so cliché. 287 00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:16,383 CHRIS: Cliché and just desperate. 288 00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:19,812 Literally not one thing about that place says "Stewie." 289 00:12:19,965 --> 00:12:20,813 BRIAN: It's like he googled 290 00:12:20,966 --> 00:12:22,815 "man cave" and said, "That." 291 00:12:22,968 --> 00:12:24,300 I mean, Nolan Ryan? 292 00:12:24,319 --> 00:12:26,578 CHRIS: Oh, I know, I know. 293 00:12:26,729 --> 00:12:28,972 BRIAN: He really solved the TV problem, huh? 294 00:12:29,065 --> 00:12:31,565 CHRIS: Everybody knows LG is the way to go. 295 00:12:31,659 --> 00:12:33,918 But what does Consumer Reports know, right? 296 00:12:34,145 --> 00:12:35,402 (Brian laughing) 297 00:12:35,497 --> 00:12:36,496 CHRIS: I wouldn't bring Eric 298 00:12:36,648 --> 00:12:39,073 within a hundred yards of that place. 299 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,984 BRIAN: Eric would be miserable up there. 300 00:12:41,002 --> 00:12:43,503 CHRIS: I could see him punching Stewie. 301 00:12:43,579 --> 00:12:46,598 That's it. Fool me once, shame on me. 302 00:12:46,749 --> 00:12:49,509 Fool me twice... you have to die. 303 00:12:49,661 --> 00:12:50,827 CHRIS: Not to nitpick, 304 00:12:50,920 --> 00:12:53,997 but those weren't even the right frozen quiches. 305 00:12:54,090 --> 00:12:55,014 BRIAN: Yeah, not great. 306 00:12:55,166 --> 00:12:56,441 CHRIS: I spit mine out in a napkin 307 00:12:56,592 --> 00:12:58,592 and put it in his "workout area." 308 00:12:58,612 --> 00:13:00,853 BRIAN: Well, I think we know he won't find it in there. 309 00:13:01,006 --> 00:13:03,156 (Brian and Chris laughing) 310 00:13:04,284 --> 00:13:06,267 ♪ ♪ 311 00:13:07,195 --> 00:13:10,530 I'm sorry your mother won't be coming downstairs for dinner. 312 00:13:10,624 --> 00:13:12,682 I know, that damn sciatica. 313 00:13:12,700 --> 00:13:14,534 You know, she's got to go see a doctor. 314 00:13:14,628 --> 00:13:16,110 The kids really wanted to be here, 315 00:13:16,204 --> 00:13:19,372 but they're watching strangers play video games on Twitch. 316 00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:23,284 BABS: Lois, would you be a dear and make a plate for me? 317 00:13:23,378 --> 00:13:25,211 Peter, I'm gonna open a bottle of wine. 318 00:13:25,363 --> 00:13:27,547 Do you mind making a plate and bringing it up for Mommy? 319 00:13:27,699 --> 00:13:30,141 Yeah, I can do that. Maybe open a couple bottles. 320 00:13:30,334 --> 00:13:32,793 Oh, oh, why? Did you, did you bring one? 321 00:13:32,813 --> 00:13:35,296 I didn't. But you always say... 322 00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:37,315 Well, you typically say, "Help yourself." 323 00:13:37,466 --> 00:13:39,526 One bottle ought to be plenty. 324 00:13:42,897 --> 00:13:44,380 Hey, Babs, 325 00:13:44,399 --> 00:13:47,033 I got something I think'll make you feel better. 326 00:13:49,996 --> 00:13:52,330 Sounds like a hippo clomping around up there. 327 00:13:52,481 --> 00:13:54,866 Ugh, I feel so sorry for Mommy. 328 00:13:55,018 --> 00:13:56,150 Don't worry about your mother. 329 00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,077 She's got her celebrity news programs up there 330 00:13:58,229 --> 00:14:01,488 -keeping her company. -(laughs) Yeah, right. 331 00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:03,191 ♪ ♪ 332 00:14:03,193 --> 00:14:06,586 Wait, celebrity news? (gasps) What time is it? 333 00:14:06,662 --> 00:14:08,588 Just about 7:30. Why? 334 00:14:08,664 --> 00:14:10,181 Oh, my God. Oh, my God! 335 00:14:10,333 --> 00:14:11,908 ♪ Extra, extra. ♪ 336 00:14:12,077 --> 00:14:14,427 (groans) 337 00:14:14,579 --> 00:14:15,928 Peter, no! 338 00:14:16,081 --> 00:14:17,021 Peter! 339 00:14:17,173 --> 00:14:18,915 (Hawaiian-style music playing) 340 00:14:18,933 --> 00:14:20,266 LOIS: Peter! 341 00:14:20,418 --> 00:14:22,251 Peter! 342 00:14:22,270 --> 00:14:23,786 ♪ ♪ 343 00:14:23,846 --> 00:14:24,696 Peter! 344 00:14:26,533 --> 00:14:31,018 Peter...! 345 00:14:31,096 --> 00:14:34,614 (screaming) 346 00:14:34,766 --> 00:14:38,751 Ah... 347 00:14:48,871 --> 00:14:51,014 (phone ringing) 348 00:15:07,132 --> 00:15:09,282 (phone buzzing) 349 00:15:18,752 --> 00:15:20,977 -(turns radio on) -♪ Just eat it ♪ -♪ Eat it ♪ 350 00:15:20,995 --> 00:15:21,920 -♪ Just eat it ♪ -♪ Eat... ♪ 351 00:15:22,147 --> 00:15:23,671 (turns radio off) 352 00:15:27,335 --> 00:15:29,677 ♪ ♪ 353 00:15:31,823 --> 00:15:33,322 Stewie, you here? 354 00:15:33,324 --> 00:15:37,310 Got your text, so let's see that "best tennis ball ever." 355 00:15:40,165 --> 00:15:41,397 STEWIE: Hey. 356 00:15:42,333 --> 00:15:44,000 Didn't hear you guys come in. 357 00:15:44,018 --> 00:15:45,184 Stewie. 358 00:15:45,353 --> 00:15:47,837 Hey, we were just saying how cozy it feels in here. 359 00:15:47,930 --> 00:15:51,282 Yeah, Brian used the term "lived-in," and I totally agree. 360 00:15:51,434 --> 00:15:53,767 There's just this real welcoming vibe... 361 00:15:53,861 --> 00:15:55,102 Right. Oh, good. 362 00:15:55,196 --> 00:15:58,014 Welcoming is exactly what I was going for. 363 00:15:58,107 --> 00:16:00,607 (screaming) 364 00:16:00,627 --> 00:16:02,276 Wh-What the hell, Stewie? 365 00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:03,444 What the hell was that ab...? 366 00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:04,504 (grunting) 367 00:16:05,614 --> 00:16:06,522 (groans) 368 00:16:07,525 --> 00:16:09,025 You two think I don't know what's going on? 369 00:16:09,194 --> 00:16:11,694 I've heard every word you two said about me 370 00:16:11,787 --> 00:16:13,304 and about my man cave. 371 00:16:13,456 --> 00:16:15,881 So... you know how much we love it. 372 00:16:15,976 --> 00:16:17,809 Ow! And for no reason! 373 00:16:18,036 --> 00:16:20,720 I bought a thousand of these frozen quiches. 374 00:16:20,872 --> 00:16:25,632 And you two are gonna eat every... last... one of them. 375 00:16:25,727 --> 00:16:26,967 (gulping) 376 00:16:26,987 --> 00:16:29,045 There you go. Good boy. 377 00:16:29,063 --> 00:16:30,396 Those aren't the... 378 00:16:30,548 --> 00:16:32,973 They're not the chicken sausage ones again, are they? 379 00:16:33,067 --> 00:16:35,159 They are the chicken sausage. 380 00:16:35,386 --> 00:16:38,738 Do, um, do you mind if I get a glass of water, then? 381 00:16:38,890 --> 00:16:40,331 I just, um... 382 00:16:40,483 --> 00:16:42,316 I just found them a little dry, is all. 383 00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:43,559 Oh, were they dry? 384 00:16:43,652 --> 00:16:45,911 You know, for my taste they were a little... 385 00:16:46,064 --> 00:16:47,913 (gulping) 386 00:16:48,008 --> 00:16:50,091 (muffled groaning) 387 00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:02,061 (brakes screech softly) 388 00:17:04,006 --> 00:17:06,190 (turn signal clicking) 389 00:17:12,866 --> 00:17:14,365 (sighs) 390 00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:16,576 ♪ ♪ 391 00:17:18,038 --> 00:17:21,113 Hey, Stewie, come on. Let us out of here. 392 00:17:21,266 --> 00:17:22,431 Stewie? 393 00:17:22,600 --> 00:17:24,691 Chris, now's our chance. We got to get out of here. 394 00:17:24,769 --> 00:17:26,461 (both grunting) 395 00:17:28,940 --> 00:17:30,030 (gasps) 396 00:17:30,124 --> 00:17:31,957 Heading somewhere? 397 00:17:32,110 --> 00:17:33,609 Stewie. 398 00:17:33,702 --> 00:17:34,777 No. No. 399 00:17:34,796 --> 00:17:36,703 My own brother. 400 00:17:36,723 --> 00:17:39,115 My so-called best friend. 401 00:17:39,133 --> 00:17:40,283 I trusted you. 402 00:17:40,301 --> 00:17:42,376 I invited you into my man cave, 403 00:17:42,470 --> 00:17:45,354 and all you did was humiliate me. 404 00:17:46,382 --> 00:17:48,791 Stewie, no. Please don't kill me. 405 00:17:48,810 --> 00:17:51,977 Wait. Did, did, did you make that? 406 00:17:52,072 --> 00:17:54,072 What? Of course I did. Why? 407 00:17:54,299 --> 00:17:56,074 Wow. No, it's just-- 408 00:17:56,225 --> 00:17:58,910 I-I just don't know how you're able to make 409 00:17:59,137 --> 00:18:01,470 such cool weapons at your age. 410 00:18:01,564 --> 00:18:04,731 Wow, that is really well-made. Holy crap. 411 00:18:04,809 --> 00:18:06,309 Do you have any others? 412 00:18:06,402 --> 00:18:08,978 -Yeah, of course I have more. -Are you serious? 413 00:18:09,071 --> 00:18:11,314 Yeah, I have like a hundred-- Wait a minute. 414 00:18:11,332 --> 00:18:13,740 You're not gonna win me over with flattery. 415 00:18:13,835 --> 00:18:15,593 ♪ ♪ 416 00:18:19,507 --> 00:18:22,007 Is there... is there anything else you like about it? 417 00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:24,844 Yeah, yeah, I mean, I mean, 418 00:18:24,996 --> 00:18:27,346 ch-check out how sturdy the sight bridge is. 419 00:18:27,515 --> 00:18:29,256 First thing I noticed, too, Chris. 420 00:18:29,275 --> 00:18:31,000 And, of course, the cocking stirrup. 421 00:18:31,002 --> 00:18:33,002 Yeah, very pretty. 422 00:18:33,095 --> 00:18:36,005 Barnett makes a hell of a bow, but this is probably 423 00:18:36,098 --> 00:18:38,174 one of the nicest ones I've ever seen. 424 00:18:38,192 --> 00:18:41,536 Anyway, Stewie, you can go ahead and kill us now. 425 00:18:46,976 --> 00:18:48,367 Listen, if you guys want, 426 00:18:48,444 --> 00:18:50,986 I suppose I could show you how to make one. 427 00:18:51,038 --> 00:18:53,522 You'd do that? Even after everything we-- 428 00:18:53,541 --> 00:18:55,591 even after everything Chris said? 429 00:18:57,211 --> 00:19:00,138 Of course I will. I love you guys. 430 00:19:00,289 --> 00:19:01,973 We love you, too, Stewie. 431 00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:04,383 Listen, go clean yourselves up. I'm around. 432 00:19:04,552 --> 00:19:06,552 Just come by whenever, and I'll show you. 433 00:19:06,646 --> 00:19:07,870 Thank you, Stewie. 434 00:19:07,963 --> 00:19:08,980 Do you do parties here? 435 00:19:09,207 --> 00:19:11,298 Because this is, like, a good event space. 436 00:19:11,467 --> 00:19:13,133 Eric is turning 50 next month, 437 00:19:13,153 --> 00:19:14,819 and we still don't have the venue. 438 00:19:15,046 --> 00:19:16,136 I think we do now. 439 00:19:16,230 --> 00:19:17,321 I'll put together a menu. 440 00:19:17,473 --> 00:19:19,824 Any dietary restrictions I should know? 441 00:19:19,975 --> 00:19:21,826 He says he's on a seafood diet. 442 00:19:22,053 --> 00:19:24,645 He sees food, then he eats it. 443 00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:26,706 (all laughing) 444 00:19:28,393 --> 00:19:31,243 I got to meet this guy. He sounds like a nut. 445 00:19:31,396 --> 00:19:33,337 ♪ ♪ 446 00:19:36,659 --> 00:19:39,418 Well, you know, Rupert, I think the lesson here 447 00:19:39,570 --> 00:19:41,737 is that maybe I shouldn't be so concerned 448 00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:43,088 with what other people think. 449 00:19:43,165 --> 00:19:45,908 I should trust my instincts and be myself... 450 00:19:45,927 --> 00:19:47,410 (Brian and Chris laughing) 451 00:19:47,503 --> 00:19:49,353 BRIAN: Oh, I can't believe he bought it. 452 00:19:49,505 --> 00:19:53,006 CHRIS: Like we would ever do Eric's nifty fifty up there. 453 00:19:53,026 --> 00:19:56,843 BRIAN: And the table assignment card station would be where exactly? 454 00:19:56,863 --> 00:19:58,362 CHRIS: And that crossbow? 455 00:19:58,514 --> 00:20:00,272 I mean, a Barnett is like, I don't know, 456 00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:02,591 Thor's hammer compared to that thing. 457 00:20:02,593 --> 00:20:04,276 BRIAN: When you pointed out the cocking stirrup-- 458 00:20:04,370 --> 00:20:06,111 I mean, if you can call that one-- 459 00:20:06,264 --> 00:20:07,279 I thought I was gonna lose it. 460 00:20:07,432 --> 00:20:08,964 CHRIS: Oh, I know. If you're gonna... 461 00:20:09,024 --> 00:20:12,435 BRIAN: Oh, oh. Hey, there he is, David Cross. 462 00:20:12,453 --> 00:20:15,287 CHRIS: Riddick Bowe. The Crossbow Kid. 463 00:20:15,364 --> 00:20:16,789 -(bow snaps) -CHRIS: Ow! -(thud) 464 00:20:16,925 --> 00:20:19,032 BRIAN: Stewie... Come on, Stewie. 465 00:20:19,126 --> 00:20:20,609 -(bow snaps) -BRIAN: Aah! -(thuds) 466 00:20:20,703 --> 00:20:22,035 MEG: Hey, Stewie. 467 00:20:22,055 --> 00:20:23,870 Sorry, I couldn't find a shirt or a bra, 468 00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:26,782 so I figured I'd just let 'em flop around the hallway... 469 00:20:26,875 --> 00:20:28,542 -(bow snaps) -(thud) 470 00:20:28,636 --> 00:20:31,020 Mom! Stewie shot himself. 471 00:20:47,638 --> 00:20:49,038 There you go. 472 00:20:50,733 --> 00:20:52,166 Get it all out. 473 00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:55,494 Hey, guys. 474 00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:58,481 -♪ Extra, extra. ♪ -Peter, no. 475 00:20:58,499 --> 00:21:00,466 No, no, no, no!