1 00:03:00,931 --> 00:03:03,976 The princess nodded, and the frog said, 2 00:03:04,476 --> 00:03:08,272 "That which you have promised, you must perform." 3 00:03:10,941 --> 00:03:12,234 Very good. Keep reading. 4 00:03:13,861 --> 00:03:17,239 "So the princess leaned in and kissed the frog, 5 00:03:17,990 --> 00:03:21,785 "but as she did, he became a handsome prince, 6 00:03:22,369 --> 00:03:24,455 "and they rode off to his kingdom, 7 00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:29,293 "where they lived happily ever after." 8 00:03:30,294 --> 00:03:32,463 Happily ever after. 9 00:03:33,505 --> 00:03:35,925 There's no such thing as "happily ever after." 10 00:03:37,760 --> 00:03:39,803 Not for a real princess. 11 00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:44,266 The prince my father wants me to marry will always be a frog. 12 00:03:44,308 --> 00:03:47,895 My offer still stands. I will help you get to America. 13 00:03:48,187 --> 00:03:50,314 - America? That's very kind. 14 00:03:50,648 --> 00:03:52,441 But we're running out of time. 15 00:03:52,524 --> 00:03:55,861 I know of a ship bound for America, but we must leave tonight. 16 00:03:55,945 --> 00:03:57,821 - Leave tonight? - We must hurry, Princess. 17 00:04:06,497 --> 00:04:08,165 Hurry, Princess. 18 00:05:10,269 --> 00:05:12,062 Mung Goo Hi. 19 00:05:13,397 --> 00:05:15,024 Zhou Hei. 20 00:05:15,566 --> 00:05:16,900 Chow Lu. 21 00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:48,951 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, that's it. 22 00:06:48,992 --> 00:06:52,162 Okay. Great. Great. Okay. 23 00:06:52,246 --> 00:06:54,998 Come here. Look at this. Spent a lot of time on this. 24 00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:57,334 Now, pay attention, 'cause I don't want any mistakes. 25 00:06:57,418 --> 00:06:59,878 Now, I've calculated the speed of the train and the speed of our horses. 26 00:06:59,962 --> 00:07:02,214 We meet at this vector. The only variable is the wind. 27 00:07:02,339 --> 00:07:04,383 Technically, if you travel over here on the horses... 28 00:07:04,466 --> 00:07:05,509 Is this the train? 29 00:07:18,522 --> 00:07:21,900 All right. We're just gonna wing it, like we always do. 30 00:07:22,025 --> 00:07:24,027 Ride down, jump on the train, 31 00:07:24,111 --> 00:07:26,864 hoorah the money, head back to the cathouse, all right? 32 00:07:26,905 --> 00:07:29,533 - Mmm-hmm. - Let's go. Come on. Move out. Go! 33 00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:33,871 You okay? Nervous? It's all right to be nervous when you're new. 34 00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:36,039 You'll be okay. I'll keep an eye on you. 35 00:07:36,165 --> 00:07:39,168 All you gotta do is follow my lead. All right, look alive, outlaws! 36 00:07:45,549 --> 00:07:49,511 "So the princess leaned in and kissed the frog, 37 00:07:49,553 --> 00:07:53,682 "but as she did, he became a handsome prince, 38 00:07:53,724 --> 00:07:56,226 "and they rode off to his kingdom, 39 00:07:56,268 --> 00:07:59,688 "where they lived happily ever after." 40 00:08:11,074 --> 00:08:13,076 Reach for the sky, ladies and gentlemen! 41 00:08:13,243 --> 00:08:15,913 Touch that gun and I'll blow your goddamn head off! 42 00:08:15,996 --> 00:08:17,247 What are you doin'? 43 00:08:17,289 --> 00:08:19,041 I sorta like to be the only guy that talks, Wallace. 44 00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:21,376 - All right. I'm sorry. - That's okay. That's okay. Good. 45 00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:23,921 Don't worry. Come on, come on. Big 'Un, let's go. 46 00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:26,131 Why is the new guy talking? Where did you get this guy? 47 00:08:26,215 --> 00:08:29,426 You know I'm the only one who talks. Okay, everybody keep calm. 48 00:08:29,510 --> 00:08:31,595 You think you're gonna shoot me? Is that right? 49 00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:34,431 What you got right in here? Yeah, you got this gun? 50 00:08:34,515 --> 00:08:36,433 You think you're gonna do something with that gun? 51 00:08:36,517 --> 00:08:38,894 Come on, lady bird. You got anything besides yarn? 52 00:08:40,521 --> 00:08:42,523 You got it out for me! - Hey! 53 00:08:42,606 --> 00:08:44,900 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No. 54 00:08:44,942 --> 00:08:47,444 Come here. Come here. We don't steal from women. 55 00:08:47,528 --> 00:08:49,905 Get over here. Take that side. 56 00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:53,617 Give me your hand. Give me your hand. 57 00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,954 I'm so sorry about that. I apologize. 58 00:08:58,330 --> 00:08:59,790 First time you've seen an outlaw? 59 00:09:01,124 --> 00:09:03,585 Scared? Kind of excited, too? 60 00:09:03,835 --> 00:09:06,213 All mixed up? Yeah. 61 00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:11,343 Last train we robbed, we were naked, it was so hot out. 62 00:09:12,135 --> 00:09:13,637 Ooh! That was somethin'. 63 00:09:16,139 --> 00:09:17,975 Yeah, it's got my initials right there. 64 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,645 What are you lookin' at? 65 00:09:24,523 --> 00:09:27,359 Wait! Stop! Where did you get this guy? 66 00:09:27,776 --> 00:09:30,654 - Texas. - Texas? Are you insane? 67 00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:33,115 Just shoot me now, 'cause I don't understand what we're doing here. 68 00:09:33,365 --> 00:09:36,994 Sir, sir, sir, sir. Come here, come here, come here. Sit down. 69 00:09:37,035 --> 00:09:38,662 - Excuse me. - Sir, sit down. 70 00:09:47,087 --> 00:09:48,505 What happened? 71 00:09:48,547 --> 00:09:51,300 - Wallace, what are you doing? - I'm just wingin' it. 72 00:09:51,675 --> 00:09:54,177 No! That's not how we wing it! 73 00:09:54,261 --> 00:09:57,014 No more winging it! Stop! Come on, Big 'Un. 74 00:09:57,055 --> 00:09:58,599 You've lost your "winging it" privileges. 75 00:09:58,682 --> 00:09:59,891 Damn. 76 00:10:00,183 --> 00:10:01,435 Damn! 77 00:10:39,723 --> 00:10:44,102 Who killed my uncle? Who did this? 78 00:11:14,925 --> 00:11:17,386 Give me the dynamite. Give me the dynamite. 79 00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:19,805 No, no, no, no. You stay here. You don't get to come. 80 00:11:19,888 --> 00:11:23,475 - Keep an eye on wing nut. - Hey, Blue, looky here! 81 00:11:36,446 --> 00:11:37,531 Okay. 82 00:11:40,951 --> 00:11:42,119 Who killed my uncle? 83 00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:45,330 What in the hell is this, the Orient Express? 84 00:11:47,499 --> 00:11:49,292 - Get him! - Come here! 85 00:12:35,464 --> 00:12:39,009 What? Hey! The safe's getting ready to blow! 86 00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:41,011 Get ready to reap the fruits of our labor. 87 00:13:13,376 --> 00:13:15,086 Move it! Let's go! 88 00:13:16,421 --> 00:13:20,008 Roy, you just blew the shit out of our fruits. 89 00:13:26,389 --> 00:13:27,933 Oh, shit. 90 00:13:34,272 --> 00:13:36,024 We got a Chinaman to catch. 91 00:13:40,946 --> 00:13:42,906 Stop! Stop! 92 00:13:46,952 --> 00:13:49,830 Stop! Stop! Turn around! 93 00:13:51,248 --> 00:13:52,457 Turn around! 94 00:13:57,754 --> 00:13:59,172 What the... 95 00:14:00,382 --> 00:14:02,926 - Who are you? Hey, Roy! 96 00:14:03,218 --> 00:14:07,347 Don't you worry about a thing! I got you covered! 97 00:14:07,430 --> 00:14:09,432 No! No! 98 00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:11,601 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 99 00:14:17,232 --> 00:14:18,942 Roll, baby, roll! 100 00:14:47,762 --> 00:14:51,641 Reach for the sky, O'Bannon! It's my gang now! 101 00:15:16,041 --> 00:15:18,001 I don't understand. 102 00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:21,212 You said your friend had a large estate. 103 00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:22,964 He does. 104 00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:26,968 - What exactly does he do? - Well, you could say 105 00:15:27,010 --> 00:15:28,970 he's a philanthropist. 106 00:15:29,012 --> 00:15:32,390 He helps Chinese immigrants get back on their feet. 107 00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:13,431 Welcome to America, Princess. 108 00:16:14,849 --> 00:16:15,976 Lo Fong. 109 00:16:18,853 --> 00:16:20,814 Forgive me if I do not bow. 110 00:16:21,022 --> 00:16:24,150 Calvin, this man is a trai... 111 00:16:25,235 --> 00:16:26,736 Traitor. 112 00:16:26,820 --> 00:16:29,990 Why? Because he ran away from the Forbidden City? 113 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:43,086 Your reward is on the table, Mr. Andrews. 114 00:16:56,433 --> 00:16:59,811 Well, now you're gonna have to double it, or I'm gonna kill her. 115 00:17:03,732 --> 00:17:06,234 One thing about the Chinese, Mr. Andrews... 116 00:17:09,404 --> 00:17:10,780 Aah! 117 00:17:11,614 --> 00:17:14,159 We do not renegotiate. 118 00:17:28,548 --> 00:17:31,384 Whatever you think I'm going to do for you, 119 00:17:33,803 --> 00:17:35,346 you're wrong. 120 00:17:36,848 --> 00:17:39,267 It was just like a nightmare. 121 00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:42,312 You wouldn't believe it if I told you. 122 00:17:42,395 --> 00:17:44,147 My gang left me in the desert. 123 00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:47,358 I felt like all the other cowboys hated my guts. 124 00:17:48,068 --> 00:17:51,488 Everyone was... I just missed you. I missed all of you. 125 00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:53,990 We missed you, too, Roy. 126 00:17:54,032 --> 00:17:56,159 I think it's medication time. 127 00:18:00,497 --> 00:18:02,791 Come here, devil woman. 128 00:18:03,958 --> 00:18:05,585 Oh. Mmm. 129 00:18:06,252 --> 00:18:08,671 Oh! Ooh, that's naughty. 130 00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:12,217 Ohh. Ow, careful. Careful with that. 131 00:18:12,509 --> 00:18:14,886 Ow, ow. Careful. Ow. 132 00:18:14,969 --> 00:18:17,305 Ow. Aaaah! 133 00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:27,398 Holy crap! The vultures are eating my head! 134 00:18:28,024 --> 00:18:30,068 Aaaah! Aaaah! 135 00:18:30,443 --> 00:18:33,738 Help! Help! My gang buried me! 136 00:18:34,322 --> 00:18:36,157 They left me for dead! 137 00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:38,493 Ooh! Ooh. 138 00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:42,539 Oh, thank heavens. I thought you were a mirage. 139 00:18:43,248 --> 00:18:46,709 - Oh, come on. Water. - You. 140 00:18:51,214 --> 00:18:53,383 - You killed my uncle! - Bull! 141 00:18:53,424 --> 00:18:55,718 That was Wallace all the way. 142 00:18:56,553 --> 00:18:59,597 - He was one of your bandits. - He wasn't part of my gang. 143 00:18:59,681 --> 00:19:02,225 He was a new guy. He's crazy as a road lizard. 144 00:19:02,934 --> 00:19:06,688 - You deserve to die. - Hold on a second. 145 00:19:07,438 --> 00:19:09,732 You know what no one's saying here? 146 00:19:09,816 --> 00:19:12,735 I had a chance to kill you on that train, and I chose not to. 147 00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:15,738 'Cause I'm not a barbarian. 148 00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:19,325 - Hey! Where are you going? - Carson City. 149 00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:22,996 I'm closer to diggin' myself to China than you are to gettin' to Carson City. 150 00:19:24,247 --> 00:19:26,249 - Hey! - Which way? 151 00:19:26,457 --> 00:19:29,544 Hey, that's better. Dig me out and I'll show you. 152 00:19:33,756 --> 00:19:34,924 Which way? 153 00:19:39,971 --> 00:19:42,140 You see the mountains over there? 154 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:45,894 Carson City is on the other side. 155 00:19:47,770 --> 00:19:50,982 All right, dig me out. I kept my end of the bargain. 156 00:19:52,609 --> 00:19:54,861 Dig me out. 157 00:19:56,279 --> 00:19:57,780 Dig. 158 00:19:59,449 --> 00:20:02,076 Hey! Hey! 159 00:20:03,578 --> 00:20:06,623 - Come on! - Don't talk. Just dig. 160 00:20:10,418 --> 00:20:11,586 Aargh! 161 00:24:48,988 --> 00:24:49,989 Hey! 162 00:26:21,038 --> 00:26:24,834 Where is Carson City? 163 00:29:06,036 --> 00:29:07,997 - How. - How. 164 00:29:09,999 --> 00:29:11,584 - How. - How. 165 00:29:11,667 --> 00:29:15,588 - How. How. How. How. - How. 166 00:30:50,516 --> 00:30:52,935 I thought you might be hungry. 167 00:30:58,566 --> 00:30:59,900 You were wrong. 168 00:31:00,609 --> 00:31:03,112 You would find me a much better host 169 00:31:03,195 --> 00:31:06,282 if we could come to some sort of an arrangement. 170 00:31:09,243 --> 00:31:10,953 An arrangement? 171 00:31:11,745 --> 00:31:15,040 Like the one you have with the slaves working on this rail road? 172 00:31:17,042 --> 00:31:18,961 These people are free to leave. 173 00:31:21,505 --> 00:31:23,632 What do you want with me? 174 00:31:25,467 --> 00:31:29,430 Once I have the emperor's gold, my work will be complete. 175 00:31:33,767 --> 00:31:34,810 Princess. 176 00:31:39,481 --> 00:31:41,650 I think it is time for you to be among your people. 177 00:31:49,241 --> 00:31:52,369 They don't look like any lnjuns I ever seen, Jedediah. 178 00:31:52,453 --> 00:31:54,330 That's because they're not lnjuns, woman! 179 00:31:54,413 --> 00:31:55,414 They're Jews! 180 00:33:19,248 --> 00:33:21,667 You, stay. 181 00:33:51,488 --> 00:33:53,449 Fellas, get a load of this. 182 00:34:03,709 --> 00:34:04,752 How. 183 00:34:19,767 --> 00:34:21,643 Is this Carson City? 184 00:34:23,353 --> 00:34:25,814 No, this ain't Carson City, Chief. 185 00:34:25,856 --> 00:34:29,318 You're gonna have to get your firewater somewhere else. 186 00:35:12,236 --> 00:35:14,530 All right, Roy, ante up. 187 00:35:28,710 --> 00:35:30,420 And stay out! 188 00:35:42,683 --> 00:35:45,060 You bounce back fast, kimosabe. 189 00:35:53,902 --> 00:35:54,903 Ow. 190 00:35:56,947 --> 00:35:59,158 What are you doin' here? I thought you were going to Carson City. 191 00:35:59,741 --> 00:36:02,536 You! You gave me bad directions! 192 00:36:02,578 --> 00:36:04,580 No, I gave you wrong directions. 193 00:36:05,873 --> 00:36:07,249 You want your toothpicks back? 194 00:36:09,668 --> 00:36:11,378 You got a lot of nerve, comin' in here with that... 195 00:36:11,420 --> 00:36:12,921 Give it back to me! 196 00:36:24,016 --> 00:36:25,267 Ain't that somethin'? 197 00:36:28,896 --> 00:36:30,272 Take your hand off me. 198 00:36:39,823 --> 00:36:40,991 - Ohh! - Ohh! 199 00:36:43,410 --> 00:36:45,621 Hey, I just want to go to Carson City! 200 00:37:08,644 --> 00:37:10,270 Whoa, whoa! 201 00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:21,865 You're goin' for a ride! 202 00:37:22,908 --> 00:37:24,034 Aaah! Aaah! 203 00:37:58,026 --> 00:37:59,361 No! 204 00:38:08,036 --> 00:38:09,496 Yes! Yes! 205 00:38:12,666 --> 00:38:13,875 Yes! Yes! 206 00:38:15,460 --> 00:38:16,670 No! No! 207 00:38:18,046 --> 00:38:20,215 Sorry! I'm sorry! 208 00:38:20,257 --> 00:38:21,717 You! 209 00:38:40,027 --> 00:38:43,238 - Who in the hell started this? - The Chinaman. 210 00:38:48,744 --> 00:38:51,580 Let me out! Give me the book back! 211 00:38:51,621 --> 00:38:53,332 I have to go to Carson City 212 00:38:53,415 --> 00:38:54,624 to rescue the princess! 213 00:38:54,708 --> 00:38:57,711 You've got the wrong person! I don't belong here! 214 00:38:57,753 --> 00:38:59,921 Hey! 215 00:38:59,963 --> 00:39:01,089 Keep goin' with the Chinese. 216 00:39:01,173 --> 00:39:02,966 That's workin'. They're about to let you out. 217 00:39:03,050 --> 00:39:04,092 Give me the book back! 218 00:39:04,134 --> 00:39:06,887 For cryin' out loud, just give him the book back, please. 219 00:39:06,928 --> 00:39:07,971 If it'll give us some peace and quiet... 220 00:39:08,055 --> 00:39:09,264 - Open it up! - Forget about it. 221 00:39:09,306 --> 00:39:10,599 They're not givin' you the book back. 222 00:39:10,640 --> 00:39:12,434 - Drop the book. - I wasted enough time with you. 223 00:39:12,476 --> 00:39:14,561 What? You've wasted enough time with me? 224 00:39:14,603 --> 00:39:15,979 - What about me? - Give me the book! 225 00:39:16,063 --> 00:39:18,231 - Listen for a second. Stop! - Give me the book! Hey! 226 00:39:18,273 --> 00:39:21,735 Listen! Stop! You're not in the East, okay? 227 00:39:21,777 --> 00:39:25,614 You're not in China. This is the West. The sun doesn't rise here, it sets here, 228 00:39:25,697 --> 00:39:27,282 and you're closer to getting us hung 229 00:39:27,366 --> 00:39:29,451 than you are getting that book back, okay? 230 00:39:31,203 --> 00:39:34,956 Now, just... I like that. 231 00:39:35,040 --> 00:39:37,250 That's what I'm talking about. You're wound so tight. 232 00:39:37,292 --> 00:39:40,128 You're the most irritable guy I've ever been around. Just relax for a second. 233 00:39:40,170 --> 00:39:43,131 Take ten minutes, and then you can go back to screaming, I promise. 234 00:39:43,215 --> 00:39:45,967 I'll join you. Okay, just relax for a second. 235 00:39:48,428 --> 00:39:49,679 Come on, sit down. 236 00:39:52,682 --> 00:39:54,101 Come on. 237 00:39:59,523 --> 00:40:01,108 Just relax. 238 00:40:02,984 --> 00:40:04,152 Is that relaxed? 239 00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:07,489 You look sort of rigid there. 240 00:40:08,990 --> 00:40:11,159 You know what? We got off on the wrong foot. 241 00:40:11,243 --> 00:40:13,286 Let's try to start again. 242 00:40:14,663 --> 00:40:17,332 Man, you sure can fight. 243 00:40:17,416 --> 00:40:19,668 I've never seen anything like that. 244 00:40:20,919 --> 00:40:22,337 It was... 245 00:40:22,963 --> 00:40:24,548 I'm trying to give you a compliment. 246 00:40:26,174 --> 00:40:29,302 You're not still mad about me pointin' you in the wrong direction, are you? 247 00:40:29,344 --> 00:40:32,889 Come on. You gotta be able to laugh at stuff like that. 248 00:40:32,973 --> 00:40:34,266 Like me in the desert. 249 00:40:34,349 --> 00:40:36,560 I don't hold any grudges. I laugh about it. 250 00:40:36,643 --> 00:40:39,855 I'm not angry at you. You just left me there with chopsticks to die. 251 00:40:39,938 --> 00:40:44,317 Roy, all by his lonesome. Just me and the buzzards pic:kin' at my head. 252 00:40:46,611 --> 00:40:49,364 You're a very silent man, aren't you? 253 00:40:50,198 --> 00:40:52,409 You weren't expecting to see old Roy in that bar, were you? 254 00:40:52,492 --> 00:40:54,536 Be honest. Were you? Huh? 255 00:40:58,540 --> 00:41:00,542 Did you really use those chopsticks? 256 00:41:00,625 --> 00:41:02,043 You better believe it. 257 00:41:04,004 --> 00:41:07,215 Now you laugh. That's funny. I gotta remember that one. 258 00:41:07,299 --> 00:41:09,176 So, who are you? 259 00:41:09,885 --> 00:41:12,846 I'm Imperial Guard to the Emperor of China. 260 00:41:13,722 --> 00:41:15,390 China. 261 00:41:15,432 --> 00:41:19,895 - What's with the book? - The book belongs to Princess Pei Pei. 262 00:41:19,936 --> 00:41:21,771 - Who? - Princess Pei Pei. 263 00:41:21,855 --> 00:41:24,399 She was kidnapped from the Forbidden City. 264 00:41:24,441 --> 00:41:27,777 Forbidden City? I like that, the Forbidden City. 265 00:41:27,861 --> 00:41:32,741 A princess kidnapped. It's so mysterious. Oh, go ahead. 266 00:41:32,782 --> 00:41:35,076 The emperor sent us to get her back. 267 00:41:35,118 --> 00:41:37,412 Us? You mean your friends from the train? 268 00:41:37,454 --> 00:41:39,247 They are also Imperial Guards. 269 00:41:39,289 --> 00:41:42,584 They have four days to bring the gold to Carson City. 270 00:41:42,626 --> 00:41:45,420 - What gold? - The gold for the princess. 271 00:41:48,298 --> 00:41:50,550 The gold... Was the gold on the train? 272 00:41:50,592 --> 00:41:52,093 Yes. 273 00:41:56,973 --> 00:41:58,266 How much gold? 274 00:42:00,101 --> 00:42:01,394 One hundred thousand pieces. 275 00:42:04,439 --> 00:42:07,651 Sir? Sir? Could you hand us that book, please? 276 00:42:07,734 --> 00:42:09,986 Sir, there's been a mistake. He has... 277 00:42:10,070 --> 00:42:11,571 Sir... Yeah. 278 00:42:22,249 --> 00:42:25,835 We're gonna get that book, and we're gonna get you out of here. 279 00:42:25,919 --> 00:42:28,755 - You help me escape? - Shh. Yes. 280 00:42:28,797 --> 00:42:31,800 - Why? - Why? I'm gonna tell you why. 281 00:42:31,883 --> 00:42:34,469 Because there are some things in this world that are just wrong, 282 00:42:34,511 --> 00:42:37,514 and stealing a princess is one of them. 283 00:42:37,597 --> 00:42:39,641 Yeah. That's wrong. 284 00:42:39,724 --> 00:42:40,767 I'll tell you another thing. 285 00:42:40,809 --> 00:42:42,978 I feel guilty about leading you up that mountain. 286 00:42:43,019 --> 00:42:45,272 What was I thinking? How much time did we waste there? 287 00:42:45,313 --> 00:42:48,108 That was stupid. It wasn't funny. All right? 288 00:42:48,149 --> 00:42:50,485 Now, sit tight and let me figure this out. 289 00:42:51,695 --> 00:42:54,030 All right, come on, Roy. 290 00:42:54,114 --> 00:42:56,324 Maybe... Maybe I pretend to be sick, 291 00:42:56,366 --> 00:42:58,159 then attack the guards when they come in. 292 00:42:58,201 --> 00:43:00,453 Okay, you mean the sick prisoner routine? 293 00:43:00,495 --> 00:43:02,831 Yeah. Does that still work in China? 294 00:43:02,872 --> 00:43:04,874 'Cause here it's sorta been done to death. 295 00:43:07,544 --> 00:43:10,171 - I have another idea. - No, no, no, no, no. 296 00:43:10,213 --> 00:43:11,256 Here's how you help me. 297 00:43:11,339 --> 00:43:13,508 You stay on your side of the room, let me figure it out over here. 298 00:43:13,592 --> 00:43:15,677 Okay, you play over there. 299 00:43:18,888 --> 00:43:22,142 Think. Think. What do we got here? Oh, yeah. 300 00:43:22,183 --> 00:43:23,685 Okay. 301 00:43:24,603 --> 00:43:27,856 We got wood. We got a wall made out of wood. 302 00:43:27,897 --> 00:43:30,025 That's good. Oh, we got pillows. 303 00:43:32,819 --> 00:43:36,156 We got pillows, sheets. We got the sheets and the mattress. 304 00:43:36,197 --> 00:43:39,826 Okay, let's put it all together. Let's think. Add it up, add it up. 305 00:43:39,868 --> 00:43:42,203 What do we got? What do we got? 306 00:43:45,123 --> 00:43:47,375 What are you doing? Stop! Stop! 307 00:43:47,417 --> 00:43:49,586 - What are you doing? - Shh. 308 00:43:49,669 --> 00:43:52,881 - Hold this for me. - No, no. That's your shirt. You hold it. 309 00:43:59,346 --> 00:44:02,098 I like your energy, but I'm not with you. 310 00:44:02,182 --> 00:44:04,225 When the shirt gets wet, it doesn't break. 311 00:44:04,267 --> 00:44:05,852 I don't know what that means. 312 00:44:06,686 --> 00:44:08,229 And then... 313 00:44:11,650 --> 00:44:15,070 Okay. And then what... Then with the wet shirt, you... 314 00:44:15,111 --> 00:44:17,864 You bend the bars. That's the payoff. 315 00:44:18,531 --> 00:44:20,575 Don't waste my time with stuff like that, okay? 316 00:44:20,617 --> 00:44:23,203 A 2,000-year-old civilization, that's all you can come up with? 317 00:44:23,244 --> 00:44:25,705 Shame on you. Shame on you. 318 00:44:33,797 --> 00:44:37,550 Come on. Stop, please. It's embarrassing. 319 00:44:49,604 --> 00:44:52,565 - See? I told you so. - No, you said, "Wet shirt don't break," 320 00:44:52,607 --> 00:44:54,275 not "Piss shirt bend bar." 321 00:44:56,111 --> 00:44:58,113 - Twist it. - Help. 322 00:44:58,196 --> 00:45:00,740 Okay, there. Get it. There you go. 323 00:45:02,409 --> 00:45:04,786 Just one more. Yeah. 324 00:45:04,869 --> 00:45:07,288 You're as strong as an ox! Go! You can do it! 325 00:45:10,291 --> 00:45:12,752 There, you got it! We're gettin' it! 326 00:45:14,254 --> 00:45:16,464 - Hold it for me. I'll get through. - Okay. 327 00:45:16,506 --> 00:45:18,967 No, no, no. You hold it and I'll go through. 328 00:45:25,265 --> 00:45:28,351 No! Not your hand! Stop. 329 00:45:29,769 --> 00:45:31,813 - Hold it. - Adios, sucker. 330 00:45:31,855 --> 00:45:35,191 - What? - I'm just kidding. Come on. Go. 331 00:45:35,275 --> 00:45:37,360 I wouldn't leave my old pal there. 332 00:45:37,444 --> 00:45:39,696 Go. Really squeeze. 333 00:45:42,282 --> 00:45:44,325 No, no, no, no. Grab this, grab that. 334 00:45:46,035 --> 00:45:48,163 Work your magic right here. 335 00:45:50,915 --> 00:45:53,960 - Too dry. - What? Juice it up. Juice it up. Go. 336 00:45:54,002 --> 00:45:56,004 I can't! No more! 337 00:45:57,005 --> 00:45:58,798 Ah, damn it. 338 00:46:00,008 --> 00:46:02,552 Come on out, little Roy. Work your magic. 339 00:46:09,184 --> 00:46:11,728 - Hurry up. I’m trying, I'm trying. 340 00:46:11,811 --> 00:46:14,397 - Stop! Don't look at me. - Relax! 341 00:46:16,357 --> 00:46:18,485 - Relax. It'll come. - Thanks. 342 00:46:18,526 --> 00:46:21,488 - That helps. Yeah. Good. - Is that called relax? 343 00:46:36,878 --> 00:46:37,879 Whoa! 344 00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:50,725 Sheriff! Oh, thank God you're here. Get the guns! 345 00:47:00,109 --> 00:47:02,695 - Get my book! - I got it! 346 00:47:04,906 --> 00:47:06,407 Who's the pretty lady? 347 00:47:06,491 --> 00:47:09,077 - That's my wife. - How long you been in this country? 348 00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:11,579 - Four days. - Nice work. 349 00:47:14,707 --> 00:47:16,209 Hello. 350 00:47:17,210 --> 00:47:19,712 Come on. Let's adios, partner. 351 00:47:19,963 --> 00:47:21,130 Hyah! 352 00:47:26,719 --> 00:47:28,763 Well, best of luck to you. 353 00:47:28,847 --> 00:47:31,766 Guess this is what your people call sayonara. 354 00:47:33,309 --> 00:47:36,229 Looks like Fido's giving you some problems there. 355 00:47:36,271 --> 00:47:38,398 You want me to, uh, give you a hand? 356 00:47:38,439 --> 00:47:41,442 - No, I can do it. - Sure, you can. 357 00:47:41,484 --> 00:47:44,112 How is a greenhorn like you gonna make it to Carson City 358 00:47:44,195 --> 00:47:46,281 and rescue this princess? 359 00:47:48,116 --> 00:47:50,201 Stop, stop, stop, stop. 360 00:47:51,870 --> 00:47:55,123 I can't take it anymore. Watch me do it. 361 00:47:57,458 --> 00:48:00,503 Get it like this and you put it up high. 362 00:48:02,797 --> 00:48:05,550 See? It'll drift back when you're riding. 363 00:48:11,055 --> 00:48:13,099 - All right, I'll do it. - Do what? 364 00:48:13,141 --> 00:48:16,019 Take you to Carson City, help you rescue Princess "Pee Pee." 365 00:48:16,102 --> 00:48:18,813 Pei Pei. You do not care about the princess. 366 00:48:18,897 --> 00:48:21,399 You don't know me very well, do you? 367 00:48:23,818 --> 00:48:25,194 Tell you one thing, 368 00:48:25,278 --> 00:48:28,573 I'd hate to think of an innocent member of Chinese nobility suffering. 369 00:48:29,157 --> 00:48:30,283 Tell you that. 370 00:48:32,994 --> 00:48:36,456 You people believe in karma over there, right? 371 00:48:36,497 --> 00:48:38,207 Well, I've been thinking. 372 00:48:38,291 --> 00:48:41,836 There must be a reason why we keep running into each other. 373 00:48:41,920 --> 00:48:45,715 I've ridden with some terrible men, just people I couldn't trust. 374 00:48:45,798 --> 00:48:47,508 But when I look at you, 375 00:48:47,592 --> 00:48:51,304 there's something different about you, and I can see it. 376 00:48:52,805 --> 00:48:54,182 I can see it in your eyes. 377 00:48:56,809 --> 00:48:59,729 It's what the Indians call Chippichawa. 378 00:49:00,355 --> 00:49:03,191 - What's that? - Chippichawa is nobility. 379 00:49:03,232 --> 00:49:06,319 And you have it in spades. 380 00:49:08,363 --> 00:49:12,200 You've got yourself a partner. This has nothing to do with gold, okay? 381 00:49:13,242 --> 00:49:15,078 Shake on it. 382 00:49:15,745 --> 00:49:17,830 Why you spitting in your hand? 383 00:49:17,872 --> 00:49:19,999 Well, it's customary, to seal the deal. 384 00:49:20,041 --> 00:49:21,668 Come on. Let's go. 385 00:49:28,841 --> 00:49:30,885 This is gonna be a long journey. 386 00:49:35,306 --> 00:49:38,768 You boys take care now, you hear? Shalom. 387 00:49:42,480 --> 00:49:45,650 - Shalom. - Oh. Let's go. 388 00:49:50,613 --> 00:49:52,949 Yee-haw! God damn! 389 00:49:53,032 --> 00:49:56,369 Looks like y'all had a twister touch down in here. 390 00:49:56,411 --> 00:49:58,913 Roy O'Bannon and his partner come through town. 391 00:49:59,038 --> 00:50:00,248 Roy O'Bannon? 392 00:50:00,331 --> 00:50:04,127 Roy O'Bannon ain't got no partner, friend. Roy O'Bannon is dead. 393 00:50:04,210 --> 00:50:05,920 He ain't dead. 394 00:50:05,962 --> 00:50:09,757 He busted out of jail last night with the Shanghai Kid. 395 00:50:09,841 --> 00:50:12,885 Shanghai Kid? Roy got a new gang goin'? 396 00:50:12,927 --> 00:50:16,597 That son of a bitch. That two-timin' son of a bitch! 397 00:50:16,681 --> 00:50:19,600 He double-crossed us with that Chinaman from the damn train! 398 00:50:20,143 --> 00:50:23,271 Just like that. See, at kind of a rakish angle. 399 00:50:23,354 --> 00:50:27,483 - Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. - How do I look? 400 00:50:27,567 --> 00:50:31,112 I think you look great. I think you look like a real cowboy. 401 00:50:31,195 --> 00:50:33,781 Very dapper, red bandana. 402 00:50:34,157 --> 00:50:35,700 Roy O'Bannon. 403 00:50:36,868 --> 00:50:39,829 - My name is Chon Wang. - John Wayne? 404 00:50:39,912 --> 00:50:42,457 Chon Wang. 405 00:50:42,957 --> 00:50:45,251 - That's a terrible cowboy name. - Why? 406 00:50:45,293 --> 00:50:47,587 No, come on, that's not gonna work. That's horrible. 407 00:50:47,628 --> 00:50:51,424 - That's so bad. And so's the ponytail. - No! 408 00:50:55,553 --> 00:50:58,139 It doesn't look that bad, actually. 409 00:50:59,432 --> 00:51:00,808 Never touch my queue. 410 00:51:02,268 --> 00:51:04,645 That killed! OW. 411 00:51:04,729 --> 00:51:07,482 - We have to go to Carson City. - Okay. 412 00:51:07,523 --> 00:51:09,817 Now, before we go to Carson City, I want to teach you some stuff. 413 00:51:09,859 --> 00:51:10,860 Come on. 414 00:51:12,987 --> 00:51:14,739 You just follow me. 415 00:51:15,865 --> 00:51:18,701 - What's that? - Sensitivity. Increased reflexes. 416 00:51:18,785 --> 00:51:21,704 Now, these are guns. These can be your best friend or worst enemy. 417 00:51:21,788 --> 00:51:24,165 That's a spin in my left hand. That's a spin in my right hand. 418 00:51:24,207 --> 00:51:26,501 That's two spins. Now, here, I'm gonna let you hang onto this. 419 00:51:26,584 --> 00:51:29,837 See? Be careful. Always be ready. Always be ready. 420 00:51:29,879 --> 00:51:32,298 Now, try to exhale for long-range shots, 421 00:51:32,340 --> 00:51:34,342 inhale for short-range. 422 00:51:34,425 --> 00:51:36,344 All right, now cover up your ears, 'cause this could be loud. 423 00:51:36,385 --> 00:51:38,304 Cover up your ears. 424 00:51:52,401 --> 00:51:55,196 I am like a wild horse. You can't tame me. 425 00:51:55,238 --> 00:51:58,658 You put the oats in the pen, though, and I'll come in for a nibble every clay. 426 00:52:04,163 --> 00:52:06,040 But if you ever shut that gate, 427 00:52:06,082 --> 00:52:07,917 I'll jump the fence. You'll never see me again. 428 00:52:21,681 --> 00:52:25,226 Thing about your husband, and this is nothing against him, 429 00:52:25,309 --> 00:52:27,353 because I really like him, 430 00:52:27,395 --> 00:52:29,772 he comes from a very male-dominated society. 431 00:52:30,439 --> 00:52:33,943 Because I wanna be a cowboy, baby 432 00:52:34,026 --> 00:52:37,363 With the top down and the sunshine shinin' 433 00:52:37,405 --> 00:52:39,740 Cowboy, baby 434 00:52:39,824 --> 00:52:45,163 West coast chillin' with the Boon's wine Gonna be a cowboy, baby 435 00:52:45,913 --> 00:52:48,749 Ridin' at night 'cause I sleep all day 436 00:52:48,833 --> 00:52:51,294 Cowboy, baby 437 00:52:51,377 --> 00:52:54,755 I can smell a pig from a mile away 438 00:52:57,258 --> 00:52:59,427 Let me put it this way, 439 00:52:59,510 --> 00:53:02,054 my horse is definitely not my best friend. 440 00:53:02,138 --> 00:53:05,766 That's why they call me a cowboy, baby 441 00:53:05,850 --> 00:53:09,020 With the top down and the sunshine shinin' 442 00:53:09,103 --> 00:53:10,271 Cowboy, baby 443 00:53:16,152 --> 00:53:18,613 Now, people start looking at you funny, 444 00:53:18,696 --> 00:53:20,823 all you gotta say is, "Howdy, partner." 445 00:53:20,907 --> 00:53:21,908 Howdy, partner? 446 00:53:21,949 --> 00:53:24,035 Faster than that or people will think you're slow in the head. 447 00:53:24,118 --> 00:53:25,786 - Howdy, partner. Howdy, partner. 448 00:53:25,828 --> 00:53:29,248 - Just follow my lead. Howdy, partner. - Howdy, partner. 449 00:53:31,626 --> 00:53:34,795 - Howdy, partner. - Just park it right there. 450 00:53:36,047 --> 00:53:37,673 It's not working. 451 00:53:38,216 --> 00:53:42,637 Some people aren't as tolerant as I am. Not very friendly today. 452 00:53:46,307 --> 00:53:49,310 John, what are you... 453 00:53:49,393 --> 00:53:52,772 - John... - Ow. Hurt. 454 00:53:52,813 --> 00:53:54,815 Okay. We gotta work on that. 455 00:53:56,901 --> 00:53:59,028 Here you go, John. Straighten up here. 456 00:53:59,111 --> 00:54:01,155 - Roy, it hurts so bad. - I know, John, 457 00:54:01,197 --> 00:54:03,783 but I'm not gonna walk with you if you walk like that. 458 00:54:03,824 --> 00:54:05,493 I'll be okay. 459 00:54:10,581 --> 00:54:13,626 - Hey, Roy. It's you. - Holy shit! 460 00:54:14,293 --> 00:54:17,171 I'm a wanted man. Look at this! Five hundred bucks! 461 00:54:17,213 --> 00:54:18,381 - That's a lot of money. - Let me see. 462 00:54:19,423 --> 00:54:21,634 - Nice picture. - Careful, careful. 463 00:54:21,676 --> 00:54:23,970 Wow, look at this. Do you know what this means? 464 00:54:24,011 --> 00:54:26,180 - This will drive the girls crazy. - Really? 465 00:54:26,264 --> 00:54:29,225 Yes, really. Come on, let's get a couple more of these. 466 00:54:29,308 --> 00:54:31,352 - It's not bad. - I'm wanted, too! 467 00:54:31,435 --> 00:54:33,229 - What? - This. 468 00:54:35,022 --> 00:54:37,400 Oh, come on. That's not right. 469 00:54:37,483 --> 00:54:39,527 I know. I'm not from Shanghai. 470 00:54:39,610 --> 00:54:41,696 No! $1,000 for a sidekick? 471 00:54:41,737 --> 00:54:44,407 - You gotta be kidding me. - Be careful. 472 00:54:44,490 --> 00:54:46,284 Justice system's all screwed up. 473 00:54:48,369 --> 00:54:49,954 Man can't even ride a horse, 474 00:54:50,037 --> 00:54:52,707 and that's a really cool nickname, Shanghai Kid. 475 00:54:52,748 --> 00:54:54,875 It's like, got a snap to it that... 476 00:54:57,211 --> 00:55:00,548 Uh-oh, trouble. John, come here. Get over here. 477 00:55:02,216 --> 00:55:04,802 Tie 'em up over here, fellas. 478 00:55:04,927 --> 00:55:06,387 Get in here. 479 00:55:10,558 --> 00:55:12,393 - What's going on? - Shh. 480 00:55:12,435 --> 00:55:14,395 Oh. 481 00:55:14,478 --> 00:55:16,105 Howdy, partner. 482 00:55:20,067 --> 00:55:23,237 Oh, my God, it's a posse. They can't be looking for us. 483 00:55:23,279 --> 00:55:26,866 - What's "posse"? - Oh, I think they're passing us by. 484 00:55:28,576 --> 00:55:31,912 It looked like Marshal Nathan Van Cleef, the psychotic killer. 485 00:55:36,334 --> 00:55:40,755 Roy O'Bannon! This is Marshal Nathan Van Cleef. 486 00:55:40,963 --> 00:55:43,299 - Ohh! - We know you're hidin' in there. 487 00:55:43,382 --> 00:55:45,760 Oh, God, it is him. It is him. 488 00:55:45,843 --> 00:55:47,345 Why don't you throw down your six-shooters 489 00:55:47,428 --> 00:55:49,764 and come out with your hands up. 490 00:55:50,681 --> 00:55:53,559 And that goes for the scum you're ridin' with, too. 491 00:55:53,601 --> 00:55:56,937 - He won. - Roy, Roy, it's okay. 492 00:55:57,021 --> 00:55:59,940 No, it's not okay! Stop! You don't know this guy! 493 00:56:00,024 --> 00:56:01,108 Let me talk to them. 494 00:56:01,150 --> 00:56:03,944 Remember, we have to save the princess. 495 00:56:04,028 --> 00:56:05,404 What are you doin'? Stop! 496 00:56:09,450 --> 00:56:12,953 - Go easy, fellas. - Why are they shooting at me? 497 00:56:12,995 --> 00:56:15,623 What happened to "Mr. Shanghai Kid"? "Oh, I'm a wanted man"? 498 00:56:15,664 --> 00:56:17,666 - Why? - 'Cause you're an outlaw. 499 00:56:17,750 --> 00:56:20,586 - I am not an outlaw! - Stop! You're a bad guy! 500 00:56:20,628 --> 00:56:22,171 Look at that poster. What does that say? 501 00:56:23,589 --> 00:56:24,840 Drives girls crazy. 502 00:56:24,924 --> 00:56:27,176 Drives girls crazy? Drives the posse crazy. 503 00:56:27,259 --> 00:56:28,469 Makes them want to hang you, 504 00:56:28,511 --> 00:56:30,262 string you up, because you're a bad guy. 505 00:56:33,057 --> 00:56:37,561 - You got 20 seconds... - God! Give us a minute! 506 00:56:37,770 --> 00:56:39,355 Go around back, gentlemen. 507 00:56:39,438 --> 00:56:42,817 Make sure he isn't trying to pull the saddle over our eyes. 508 00:56:43,692 --> 00:56:47,571 Remember, I want the Chinaman alive. 509 00:56:49,990 --> 00:56:51,367 I'm not a bad guy. 510 00:56:51,450 --> 00:56:53,911 You're a bad guy. You're with me, you're a bad guy. 511 00:56:58,124 --> 00:56:59,834 Hey, you put me in this situation! 512 00:56:59,917 --> 00:57:02,878 - I'm the good guy, you're the bad guy! - No! We're both bad guys! 513 00:57:02,962 --> 00:57:05,423 No, only you're the bad guy! You go out there and tell them! 514 00:57:05,506 --> 00:57:07,091 No! I'm not going out there! You go out there! 515 00:57:07,174 --> 00:57:08,676 No, you have to go! 516 00:57:12,054 --> 00:57:14,932 - Did I just do that? - Not bad. 517 00:57:15,015 --> 00:57:19,270 I don't know karate, but I know "crazy," and I will use it. 518 00:57:23,774 --> 00:57:25,693 What the hell is going on in there? 519 00:57:37,580 --> 00:57:39,081 You Okay? 520 00:57:40,958 --> 00:57:42,626 You just threw me through a window. 521 00:57:42,710 --> 00:57:43,836 You got that gold? 522 00:57:45,546 --> 00:57:48,299 What? Gold? What gold? 523 00:57:48,382 --> 00:57:50,050 Wrong answer. 524 00:57:50,468 --> 00:57:55,306 Wait. I'm... I'm unarmed. I'm unarmed! 525 00:57:55,389 --> 00:57:57,766 No gun. Hold on, no gun. I don't... 526 00:57:57,850 --> 00:57:59,894 I'm unarmed! You can't shoot an unarmed man. 527 00:57:59,935 --> 00:58:03,397 - Don't worry. I help you. No, John. No, no. 528 00:58:03,439 --> 00:58:05,774 John! John... 529 00:58:05,858 --> 00:58:08,402 Fight with honor. You will win. 530 00:58:09,904 --> 00:58:11,655 Are you frickin' insane? 531 00:58:11,739 --> 00:58:13,407 Is that what they teach you in Imperial Guard School? 532 00:58:13,491 --> 00:58:15,576 - What... - Pick 'em up. 533 00:58:24,627 --> 00:58:26,921 MANI Well. 534 00:58:27,922 --> 00:58:30,049 If it ain't the Shanghai Kid. 535 00:58:32,176 --> 00:58:34,678 How about we make the Kid dance? 536 00:58:35,888 --> 00:58:38,349 Oh, come on! You can do better than that. 537 00:58:43,979 --> 00:58:46,273 You robbed the wrong train, son. 538 00:58:54,573 --> 00:58:57,785 - Look, Marshal, I think that if... - Just shut up and put on your guns. 539 00:59:05,626 --> 00:59:08,629 This is serious, you know? 540 00:59:09,547 --> 00:59:10,714 We don't come back from this. 541 00:59:10,798 --> 00:59:13,092 That's the general idea. 542 01:00:28,250 --> 01:00:30,628 What the hell you doin'? 543 01:00:34,882 --> 01:00:36,884 Stop procrastinating. Come on. Hurry up, son. 544 01:00:36,925 --> 01:00:40,804 Stop it! I'm not gonna let you cheapen it. All right? 545 01:00:40,888 --> 01:00:43,390 This is a duel. It's a sacred thing. 546 01:00:43,474 --> 01:00:46,310 It's beautiful. It's what separates us from the animals. 547 01:00:46,727 --> 01:00:49,104 - Mmm. - Oh, yeah. 548 01:00:51,732 --> 01:00:55,611 Whew! I do not envy you. You ready? 549 01:00:56,111 --> 01:00:58,447 Why don't you turn and face me like a man? 550 01:00:58,530 --> 01:01:01,617 Why don't you do it your way and I'll do it my way? How about that? 551 01:01:07,623 --> 01:01:09,792 Oh, come on, Roy. You can do it. 552 01:01:09,875 --> 01:01:11,752 Oh, no, you can't. He's gonna kill you. 553 01:01:20,386 --> 01:01:23,764 - One. - He's gonna blow you away. 554 01:01:23,806 --> 01:01:25,808 Come on, Roy. Don't think like that. 555 01:01:31,230 --> 01:01:32,856 Two. 556 01:01:32,940 --> 01:01:35,442 Oh, yeah. Be positive. 557 01:01:35,484 --> 01:01:38,195 Be the bullet. Be the lead bullet. 558 01:01:44,660 --> 01:01:46,954 - I'm about to die. Three. 559 01:01:46,995 --> 01:01:48,706 Roy! 560 01:01:51,458 --> 01:01:53,001 Duel's off! 561 01:01:55,963 --> 01:01:57,840 Roy! 562 01:01:59,299 --> 01:02:01,009 You blew it, John! 563 01:02:01,093 --> 01:02:03,846 Never interrupt a man in the middle of a duel. 564 01:02:03,929 --> 01:02:08,308 I had him. That's what kills me. I had him! I had him! 565 01:02:15,733 --> 01:02:19,486 Now you know how it feels to haul you around in that sedan chair. 566 01:02:20,738 --> 01:02:22,156 I will never bow to you. 567 01:02:26,326 --> 01:02:28,662 Take a good look at these faces. 568 01:02:29,913 --> 01:02:31,957 If you attempt to escape, 569 01:02:31,999 --> 01:02:34,877 I will kill one worker every hour 570 01:02:34,960 --> 01:02:37,171 until you are found. 571 01:02:43,844 --> 01:02:45,387 Starting with this one. 572 01:02:54,396 --> 01:02:56,440 Do not let him see you suffer. 573 01:02:58,692 --> 01:03:00,694 I know who you are. 574 01:03:03,071 --> 01:03:05,699 Please, tell no one. 575 01:03:08,994 --> 01:03:11,288 You call this a special hideout? 576 01:03:12,748 --> 01:03:14,208 Yes, it is, John. 577 01:03:14,291 --> 01:03:16,960 It's also a good place to gather intelligence, 578 01:03:17,044 --> 01:03:19,004 'cause no one passes through Carson City 579 01:03:19,046 --> 01:03:21,256 without these people hearing about it. 580 01:03:21,340 --> 01:03:22,883 Would you ask them about the princess? 581 01:03:22,966 --> 01:03:24,468 Yes, sir, I will. 582 01:03:24,551 --> 01:03:26,637 And I don't care how ugly it gets. 583 01:03:26,720 --> 01:03:28,180 I'm not gonna rest until I've pumped 584 01:03:28,222 --> 01:03:30,599 everybody in there for information, okay? 585 01:03:33,811 --> 01:03:35,145 - Hi, Roy. Hello, ladies. 586 01:03:35,229 --> 01:03:36,230 Roy. 587 01:03:36,271 --> 01:03:38,065 Make way for a couple of desperados. 588 01:03:38,148 --> 01:03:40,150 Nice to see you again, Mr. O'Bannon. 589 01:03:40,234 --> 01:03:42,236 Greetings. Hello. Roy. 590 01:03:44,112 --> 01:03:47,115 Oh, yeah, we're gonna get some information here. Trust me. 591 01:03:48,534 --> 01:03:50,577 This is not a proper hiding place. 592 01:03:50,619 --> 01:03:53,580 Oh, come on, John. Let's relax for a little bit. 593 01:03:53,664 --> 01:03:56,500 - Here, have a drink. - No. I wanna find the princess. 594 01:03:56,583 --> 01:04:01,255 So do I, but we can't exactly go door to door in Carson City looking for her. 595 01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:04,466 - Don't forget, we're wanted men. - Only because of you. 596 01:04:04,550 --> 01:04:07,344 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything's my fault. 597 01:04:12,057 --> 01:04:14,810 So, what's the princess like? 598 01:04:14,893 --> 01:04:16,979 John, what's the princess like? Is she pretty? 599 01:04:17,062 --> 01:04:20,482 - Is she a pain in the neck? - You are not fit to talk about her. 600 01:04:20,566 --> 01:04:23,277 John, you better remember where you are. 601 01:04:23,360 --> 01:04:26,613 This is the West. It's not the East. Remember? 602 01:04:26,697 --> 01:04:28,532 And the sun may rise where I come from... 603 01:04:28,615 --> 01:04:30,617 Blah, blah, blah. I know. 604 01:04:30,701 --> 01:04:32,703 Good. You remember. 605 01:04:32,786 --> 01:04:34,621 - Is she single? - What? 606 01:04:34,663 --> 01:04:38,000 Is she single? Is she married? Is she available? 607 01:04:38,083 --> 01:04:41,378 Only to a member of the Imperial family. 608 01:04:43,630 --> 01:04:48,176 Are you a member of the Imperial family? I don't think so. 609 01:04:48,260 --> 01:04:52,347 Was that a joke, John? That was a joke. 610 01:04:52,431 --> 01:04:56,018 John, that was your first joke. We gotta have a toast. Your first joke. 611 01:04:56,101 --> 01:04:57,519 - Yes. - No. 612 01:04:57,603 --> 01:05:00,814 Yes. Come on. Drink. 613 01:05:00,898 --> 01:05:02,524 - Just one. - Okay. 614 01:05:03,275 --> 01:05:05,569 But don't talk about the princess anymore. 615 01:05:05,652 --> 01:05:07,279 Word of honor. 616 01:05:12,117 --> 01:05:14,328 Be fun to play a drinking game. 617 01:05:15,203 --> 01:05:16,705 You know any Chinese drinking games? 618 01:05:16,788 --> 01:05:17,831 No. 619 01:05:17,915 --> 01:05:21,209 Every country has a drinking game. You must know one. 620 01:05:22,377 --> 01:05:23,754 Just one? 621 01:05:43,982 --> 01:05:46,026 - Uno mas? - Uno... What? 622 01:05:46,068 --> 01:05:47,194 - One more. Uno mas. - Okay. 623 01:06:02,167 --> 01:06:06,088 No! I lost? One more. 624 01:06:12,803 --> 01:06:14,805 Oh. no! Oh, yeah! 625 01:06:16,515 --> 01:06:18,433 I'm so lost, John. 626 01:06:20,394 --> 01:06:22,145 90% of the time, I don't even know 627 01:06:22,229 --> 01:06:24,231 what I'm doin' out here in the West. 628 01:06:24,272 --> 01:06:26,900 Terrible outlaw. 629 01:06:26,984 --> 01:06:30,404 - No, you're a good outlaw. - Stop, please. I'm a screw-up. 630 01:06:30,487 --> 01:06:34,324 - No, I am screw-up. Look at my scar. - No. 631 01:06:34,408 --> 01:06:37,911 One for arriving late at a guard duty. 632 01:06:38,495 --> 01:06:42,082 One for dropping fighting stick. You good. I saw you. 633 01:06:42,124 --> 01:06:43,750 The only thing I'm good at is talking. 634 01:06:47,045 --> 01:06:50,090 - It's true. - John. 635 01:06:50,173 --> 01:06:53,093 - Huh? - Take your hand off me, John. 636 01:06:53,135 --> 01:06:54,261 Oh. 637 01:06:57,597 --> 01:06:58,932 One more game? 638 01:06:58,974 --> 01:07:02,102 No. No more drinking. That's it. 639 01:07:03,145 --> 01:07:07,274 - Uno mas? - No mas, John. No mas. 640 01:07:12,029 --> 01:07:13,196 Roy? 641 01:07:14,364 --> 01:07:15,824 Roy? 642 01:07:19,703 --> 01:07:21,830 - Are you coming? - Fifi? 643 01:07:23,457 --> 01:07:24,624 Uno mas? 644 01:07:45,270 --> 01:07:46,813 {BURPS) 645 01:07:46,897 --> 01:07:50,400 So, who's your funny-looking friend? 646 01:07:51,359 --> 01:07:52,819 I don't know. 647 01:07:52,861 --> 01:07:55,489 He's this crazy Imperial Guard I met. 648 01:07:55,530 --> 01:07:57,532 He's... He's really funny. 649 01:07:59,159 --> 01:08:00,660 The guy's hysterical. 650 01:08:00,744 --> 01:08:03,663 We were just playing... Did you see us? We were just playing that game. 651 01:08:03,705 --> 01:08:06,083 John's going... 652 01:08:06,166 --> 01:08:09,169 And I was going...You can't really understand what he's saying, but... 653 01:08:09,211 --> 01:08:13,507 Roy? Roy? I never figured you for riding with a Chinaman. 654 01:08:16,176 --> 01:08:20,180 Well, I'm not exactly riding with him, Fifi. 655 01:08:20,263 --> 01:08:24,726 He's not my friend, you know. I mean, he's a Chinaman. 656 01:08:25,977 --> 01:08:27,771 Well, that's good. 657 01:08:28,480 --> 01:08:30,357 I mean... And you really... 658 01:08:30,774 --> 01:08:33,693 Were you guys talking about who he was? 659 01:08:33,735 --> 01:08:35,904 Let's talk about something else. 660 01:08:42,202 --> 01:08:44,746 Don't you look delicious? 661 01:08:45,622 --> 01:08:47,624 What's going on? - Well. 662 01:08:47,707 --> 01:08:50,460 - You! - if it isn't the Shanghai Kid. 663 01:08:55,590 --> 01:08:56,883 Here. 664 01:09:16,736 --> 01:09:18,405 Thank you. 665 01:09:22,033 --> 01:09:23,702 Ahh. Thank you. 666 01:09:24,411 --> 01:09:25,579 Uno mas? 667 01:09:29,124 --> 01:09:30,750 John, come on. We gotta get going. 668 01:09:30,834 --> 01:09:33,670 - The marshal's downstairs. - No, no, Marshal's in there. 669 01:09:35,338 --> 01:09:37,340 Oh, man, John. What'd you do to him? 670 01:09:37,424 --> 01:09:39,009 - Come on. Let's get going. - No! 671 01:09:39,092 --> 01:09:40,468 I don't wanna ride with you. 672 01:09:40,552 --> 01:09:43,054 Come on, John. Damn, you're a mean drunk. 673 01:09:44,639 --> 01:09:46,433 - Hi, horsey! - All right. Shh, shh, shh. 674 01:09:47,100 --> 01:09:49,394 - All right, it's time for a "yee-haw." - Yee-what? 675 01:09:49,436 --> 01:09:51,771 Shh, shh, shh. Roy O'Bannon special. 676 01:09:51,813 --> 01:09:54,774 We jump off, land on the back of the horse, yell "yee-haw" 677 01:09:54,816 --> 01:09:57,277 and ride off, all right? 678 01:09:58,028 --> 01:10:00,947 Watch me and do exactly as I do it. Yee-haw! 679 01:10:07,204 --> 01:10:08,663 Yee-haw! 680 01:10:10,916 --> 01:10:13,501 Okay, hyah! Hyah! 681 01:10:13,710 --> 01:10:16,004 - Hyah! Where's the head? - John! 682 01:10:17,255 --> 01:10:18,465 John, get up! 683 01:10:19,966 --> 01:10:21,301 Tie 'em up. 684 01:10:21,343 --> 01:10:24,346 What happened to my horse? Is he dead? 685 01:10:24,971 --> 01:10:26,473 No, but we are, John. 686 01:10:26,514 --> 01:10:29,726 Hi, horsey. You sleeping? - Get up. 687 01:10:32,312 --> 01:10:33,480 Hmm. 688 01:10:35,273 --> 01:10:38,068 Mighty impressive hardware you're packin'. 689 01:10:39,527 --> 01:10:43,657 Why don't you get your eyes off my package, you twisted son of a bitch. 690 01:10:48,328 --> 01:10:51,248 - I hope that's him leaving. - Your turn. 691 01:10:53,750 --> 01:10:56,044 Thank you, Mr. Van Cleef. 692 01:10:56,127 --> 01:10:58,838 Well, well. What have we here? 693 01:11:01,716 --> 01:11:03,843 Mr. O'Bannon, I presume. 694 01:11:04,427 --> 01:11:07,180 Can I get a drink of water? I got cotton mouth. Aah! 695 01:11:07,264 --> 01:11:09,683 Don't mention it. 696 01:11:10,892 --> 01:11:14,020 And this must be the famous Shanghai Kid. 697 01:11:19,025 --> 01:11:21,569 - Chon Wang? - Lo Fong? 698 01:11:21,653 --> 01:11:23,780 You remember your old comrade-in-arms? 699 01:11:23,863 --> 01:11:25,865 - Hmm? - I remember a traitor. 700 01:11:25,949 --> 01:11:28,034 I'm sensing some bad blood here. 701 01:11:28,118 --> 01:11:31,955 - Where is the gold? - Where's Princess Pei Pei? 702 01:11:32,414 --> 01:11:33,748 Stop. 703 01:11:33,832 --> 01:11:35,917 Come on. We're men. We're not pinatas. 704 01:11:36,001 --> 01:11:39,504 Okay? And we're really hungover. We're not trying to be tough guys. 705 01:11:39,587 --> 01:11:41,548 You wanna talk about the gold, let's talk about the gold. 706 01:11:41,673 --> 01:11:43,091 So, you have my gold? 707 01:11:43,174 --> 01:11:45,427 - Your gold? - Yes, we have the gold. 708 01:11:46,303 --> 01:11:49,180 - Then where is it? - The gold's in a safe place. 709 01:11:52,684 --> 01:11:53,893 Is he telling the truth? 710 01:11:59,733 --> 01:12:01,276 No. 711 01:12:01,359 --> 01:12:02,610 Ow! 712 01:12:03,695 --> 01:12:06,573 Nice, John. Way to go. Way to think on your feet. 713 01:12:06,614 --> 01:12:09,242 He cannot lie. He is bound by Imperial decree. 714 01:12:09,284 --> 01:12:11,411 Imperial decree. 715 01:12:11,494 --> 01:12:12,662 When are you gonna learn 716 01:12:12,746 --> 01:12:14,331 you're not in China anymore? 717 01:12:15,415 --> 01:12:19,002 He will never learn. He can only follow orders. 718 01:12:21,671 --> 01:12:24,758 At least I still have my honor. 719 01:12:31,598 --> 01:12:33,767 Slaves have no honor. 720 01:12:35,060 --> 01:12:36,102 No! No! - Hey! 721 01:12:40,982 --> 01:12:42,942 Now you can never go back to China. 722 01:12:46,529 --> 01:12:49,866 You blew it. You blew it, man. 723 01:12:50,492 --> 01:12:53,620 You do not want to cut his hair off, trust me. 724 01:12:54,412 --> 01:12:56,164 Nothing personal, boys. 725 01:12:58,750 --> 01:13:00,960 My loyalty is to the emperor. 726 01:13:01,044 --> 01:13:04,214 Yeah, John, I heard all about the emperor. 727 01:13:05,340 --> 01:13:07,300 Must be a hell of a man. 728 01:13:07,884 --> 01:13:09,803 He's only 12. 729 01:13:11,137 --> 01:13:13,890 Are you kidding me? You're sitting here with a noose around your neck, 730 01:13:13,973 --> 01:13:16,434 ready to die for someone whose balls haven't even dropped? 731 01:13:18,728 --> 01:13:22,899 By virtue of the authority vested in me through the territory of Nevada, 732 01:13:22,982 --> 01:13:26,319 I do hereby order these men to hang by their necks 733 01:13:26,403 --> 01:13:28,196 until their feet quit kicking. 734 01:13:35,161 --> 01:13:37,205 You're goin' to hell, boys, 735 01:13:37,288 --> 01:13:39,541 and your horses are taking you there. 736 01:13:39,833 --> 01:13:41,668 Tighten 'em up. 737 01:13:41,709 --> 01:13:44,212 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 738 01:13:44,295 --> 01:13:48,341 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 739 01:13:48,425 --> 01:13:51,428 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 740 01:13:55,140 --> 01:13:57,016 Hey! Watch it, you little punk. 741 01:13:57,058 --> 01:14:04,899 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 742 01:14:04,983 --> 01:14:06,401 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 743 01:14:06,484 --> 01:14:09,529 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 744 01:14:15,201 --> 01:14:16,911 John, what are you doing? 745 01:14:16,995 --> 01:14:18,705 Uh... 746 01:14:32,969 --> 01:14:36,139 What the hell is goin' on here? Stop those horses! 747 01:14:36,389 --> 01:14:37,390 Stop them! 748 01:14:43,938 --> 01:14:46,316 Pull it! Pull it! 749 01:14:49,694 --> 01:14:50,695 I'm back 750 01:14:53,531 --> 01:14:55,617 I'm back in the saddle again 751 01:14:55,700 --> 01:14:56,784 Help me! 752 01:14:57,535 --> 01:14:59,078 I'm back 753 01:15:01,581 --> 01:15:03,708 I'm back in the saddle again 754 01:15:06,711 --> 01:15:08,630 Well, don't just stand there! Go after them! 755 01:15:16,554 --> 01:15:18,932 Will you listen to this creek, John? 756 01:15:19,015 --> 01:15:21,267 I've never noticed what a beautiful melody a creek makes. 757 01:15:23,311 --> 01:15:25,271 I've never taken the damn time. 758 01:15:26,689 --> 01:15:28,691 Look at these mountains and these trees. 759 01:15:28,775 --> 01:15:30,276 Hell, look at these green trees. 760 01:15:30,360 --> 01:15:31,653 Come here. I don't even know the names... 761 01:15:31,736 --> 01:15:34,155 We're gonna learn the names of these green trees. Come here. 762 01:15:34,239 --> 01:15:36,366 I want you to look at these. 763 01:15:37,075 --> 01:15:39,118 Can we not... John, what are you doing? 764 01:15:39,202 --> 01:15:41,454 Are you still worried about your hair? 765 01:15:41,496 --> 01:15:44,541 John, listen to me. You're very vain. 766 01:15:44,624 --> 01:15:47,627 By the time you're 70, your queue, your ponytail, 767 01:15:47,669 --> 01:15:49,712 will be as good as new. 768 01:15:49,796 --> 01:15:51,965 - What are you doing? - I'm leaving. 769 01:15:52,048 --> 01:15:54,968 Can we not take two seconds, John? We just cheated death. 770 01:15:55,009 --> 01:15:58,304 Come on. Let's look at these mountains for a second. 771 01:15:59,222 --> 01:16:00,557 Okay, let me get my stuff. 772 01:16:00,640 --> 01:16:02,559 - God, you're unbelievable. - I'm going alone. 773 01:16:08,690 --> 01:16:12,151 What are you... John, what are you talking about? 774 01:16:12,193 --> 01:16:16,072 - I heard you. - You heard me. Okay. 775 01:16:16,155 --> 01:16:17,907 At Goldie's. 776 01:16:19,200 --> 01:16:21,536 You said I wasn't your friend. 777 01:16:24,330 --> 01:16:25,999 John... 778 01:16:26,040 --> 01:16:28,918 Hold on a second, John. I was talking to a girl. 779 01:16:29,002 --> 01:16:30,837 It was...That's taken out of context. 780 01:16:30,920 --> 01:16:32,338 - That's not... - Roy. 781 01:16:32,380 --> 01:16:36,342 You were right. How could I ever be your friend? 782 01:16:36,843 --> 01:16:38,678 I'm just a Chinaman. 783 01:16:39,721 --> 01:16:42,390 Hold on, John. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to... 784 01:16:42,473 --> 01:16:43,933 Sayonara, Roy. 785 01:17:39,113 --> 01:17:40,406 Wait here. 786 01:17:53,419 --> 01:17:54,754 Please. 787 01:18:15,692 --> 01:18:17,360 You have come a long way. 788 01:18:18,194 --> 01:18:22,115 I hope the princess you seek is worthy of such devotion. 789 01:18:24,867 --> 01:18:27,704 It is my duty to bring her home. 790 01:18:32,917 --> 01:18:35,294 I even brought her favorite book. 791 01:18:39,382 --> 01:18:41,676 That's very kind of you. 792 01:18:44,178 --> 01:18:46,180 But what if you found the princess 793 01:18:46,264 --> 01:18:49,642 and she did not wish to go back to the Forbidden City? 794 01:18:51,310 --> 01:18:53,312 Why would she want to stay here? 795 01:18:54,147 --> 01:18:56,774 Maybe she can do more for the people here 796 01:18:58,651 --> 01:19:00,820 than she could back in China. 797 01:19:08,453 --> 01:19:09,829 Princess Pei Pei. 798 01:19:14,083 --> 01:19:16,502 Please, don't draw attention. 799 01:19:19,338 --> 01:19:21,340 Please. Stand up! 800 01:19:21,424 --> 01:19:23,342 Princess, you have to come with me. 801 01:19:23,384 --> 01:19:26,721 I cannot. Fong cannot find me missing. 802 01:19:27,680 --> 01:19:30,016 Princess, I cannot leave you here. 803 01:19:34,896 --> 01:19:37,106 Please, stand up! 804 01:19:38,483 --> 01:19:40,568 Don't bow! Get up! 805 01:19:41,861 --> 01:19:43,279 Get up! 806 01:19:44,572 --> 01:19:46,199 You must go. 807 01:19:46,866 --> 01:19:50,369 If I leave, Fong will begin to kill the others. 808 01:19:50,411 --> 01:19:52,955 It is my duty to bring you home. 809 01:19:54,999 --> 01:19:56,042 I command you to go. 810 01:20:01,339 --> 01:20:02,381 Go! 811 01:20:03,216 --> 01:20:04,550 Go! 812 01:21:11,951 --> 01:21:13,619 Reach for the sky, baldy! 813 01:21:13,703 --> 01:21:15,872 That's right. It's Roy. 814 01:21:15,955 --> 01:21:17,665 Am I interrupting? 815 01:21:18,541 --> 01:21:20,543 I followed you. So what? 816 01:21:20,626 --> 01:21:23,337 What am I supposed to do, let you wander off? You're a greenhorn. 817 01:21:23,421 --> 01:21:25,548 You'll get killed out here. 818 01:21:27,341 --> 01:21:29,886 Come on! We gotta adios out of here, partner! Come on! 819 01:21:29,969 --> 01:21:32,471 Hyah! You gotta stick with me. 820 01:21:34,432 --> 01:21:36,475 Don't forget, we got a princess to save. 821 01:23:35,052 --> 01:23:38,347 Give my regards to the emperor, Princess. 822 01:23:58,576 --> 01:24:01,328 - Chon Wang? - Chon Wang? 823 01:24:01,412 --> 01:24:02,621 Chon Wang? 824 01:24:07,126 --> 01:24:09,670 That's right, Johnny Wayne is here. 825 01:24:11,338 --> 01:24:12,673 Hey, it's me. 826 01:24:13,382 --> 01:24:15,384 Why did you cut his hair? 827 01:24:15,468 --> 01:24:17,803 I tried to warn you, but you wouldn't listen. 828 01:24:17,887 --> 01:24:20,056 Go on, drop the gun. 829 01:24:20,139 --> 01:24:21,974 Now, slide it over. 830 01:24:31,984 --> 01:24:33,152 Is that her? 831 01:24:34,528 --> 01:24:36,530 She's pretty. 832 01:24:37,740 --> 01:24:38,824 Grab her. 833 01:24:40,451 --> 01:24:43,287 Come on. We'll take it from here, guys. 834 01:25:06,852 --> 01:25:09,021 John, what... John, get up. 835 01:25:09,105 --> 01:25:11,190 What are you... I thought we were past this. 836 01:25:11,232 --> 01:25:13,025 Come on, John. 837 01:25:15,611 --> 01:25:18,781 Do you see? He will always be a slave. 838 01:25:35,256 --> 01:25:36,966 This is the West, 839 01:25:39,385 --> 01:25:40,970 not the East. 840 01:25:44,056 --> 01:25:46,350 And the sun may rise 841 01:25:47,059 --> 01:25:49,061 where we come from, 842 01:25:50,646 --> 01:25:52,648 but here is where it sets. 843 01:25:56,110 --> 01:25:59,655 You want me to translate? The princess stays. 844 01:26:00,948 --> 01:26:02,992 The princess stays. 845 01:26:03,576 --> 01:26:06,412 I grab the gold, you marry the princess. 846 01:26:06,453 --> 01:26:09,582 We both hang Fong, call it a day. Mission accomplished. 847 01:26:12,710 --> 01:26:14,420 Well, well. 848 01:26:17,423 --> 01:26:20,134 Nice to see we're all churchgoers. 849 01:26:22,094 --> 01:26:24,138 Son of a bitch! With my own guns! 850 01:26:25,514 --> 01:26:27,725 Sweet, ain't it? 851 01:26:36,817 --> 01:26:40,321 How about that? It's a Mexican standoff. 852 01:26:41,780 --> 01:26:44,408 Only we ain't got no Mexicans. 853 01:27:03,719 --> 01:27:04,803 No! 854 01:27:06,263 --> 01:27:08,015 Princess Pei Pei! 855 01:28:22,798 --> 01:28:25,050 - I hit you? No. 856 01:28:25,092 --> 01:28:27,594 But you're gettin' really close. 857 01:28:27,678 --> 01:28:30,222 You've almost killed me, like, 17 times already. 858 01:28:33,600 --> 01:28:35,602 Eighteen, 19, 20! 859 01:28:37,271 --> 01:28:39,273 You're on fire today! 860 01:30:20,999 --> 01:30:22,918 How do you survive out here? 861 01:30:23,585 --> 01:30:26,130 What's that supposed to mean? These aren't my... 862 01:30:26,505 --> 01:30:28,090 These guns are really weird. 863 01:31:03,292 --> 01:31:05,043 Oh, man. 864 01:31:08,005 --> 01:31:10,215 Stay low! 865 01:31:46,084 --> 01:31:48,837 Maybe we should let bygones be bygones. 866 01:31:48,921 --> 01:31:50,214 You got off some good shots. 867 01:31:51,048 --> 01:31:55,469 I got off some good ones. Let's call it a tie. 868 01:31:55,552 --> 01:31:57,554 What's the matter, O'Bannon? Out of bullets? 869 01:31:57,930 --> 01:32:00,015 No, I got one left. 870 01:32:01,558 --> 01:32:03,435 Tell you what I'll do. 871 01:32:03,769 --> 01:32:07,314 I'll take out all my bullets but one. 872 01:32:07,397 --> 01:32:10,108 And that way, we'll be even. How's that? 873 01:32:11,652 --> 01:32:13,987 Okay. That sounds fair. 874 01:32:14,863 --> 01:32:16,114 You'd do that for me? 875 01:32:17,449 --> 01:32:18,617 Oh, yeah. 876 01:32:22,329 --> 01:32:24,206 You bet I would. 877 01:33:45,370 --> 01:33:46,872 We come out on three. 878 01:33:47,372 --> 01:33:49,916 Okay, but... But let me count. 879 01:33:52,753 --> 01:33:55,297 Fight with honor. Okay. 880 01:33:55,380 --> 01:33:57,007 Fight with... Okay. One! 881 01:33:58,050 --> 01:34:00,969 Two! Two and a half! 882 01:34:01,053 --> 01:34:02,596 Two and seven-eighths! 883 01:34:02,721 --> 01:34:03,889 Three! 884 01:34:24,242 --> 01:34:26,703 How the hell did that happen? 885 01:35:07,202 --> 01:35:08,870 It's a miracle. 886 01:35:10,706 --> 01:35:13,125 I am invincible. 887 01:35:14,751 --> 01:35:16,420 Roy! 888 01:35:17,170 --> 01:35:20,006 Invincible! 889 01:36:07,512 --> 01:36:11,183 - Now it's time for you to die. - Adios, partner. 890 01:36:42,923 --> 01:36:44,466 Wow. 891 01:37:02,150 --> 01:37:04,069 Roy! 892 01:37:13,286 --> 01:37:15,163 He took the gold. 893 01:37:29,469 --> 01:37:32,514 Is that all you care about, is the gold? 894 01:37:32,597 --> 01:37:34,099 Shame on you. 895 01:37:35,225 --> 01:37:38,478 There's more to life than money. I hope you learn that one day. 896 01:37:38,562 --> 01:37:40,605 What happened? 897 01:37:40,647 --> 01:37:43,733 What? Nothing, nothing. I just killed him. How'd you do? 898 01:37:43,775 --> 01:37:44,943 How? 899 01:37:44,985 --> 01:37:46,570 What do you mean, how? I shot him with my gun. 900 01:37:46,611 --> 01:37:48,572 Come on. Tell me the truth. 901 01:37:48,613 --> 01:37:51,616 It was unbelievable. You missed a miracle. I had one bullet left. 902 01:37:51,700 --> 01:37:53,201 He had, like, a million left. 903 01:37:53,285 --> 01:37:55,120 He lied to me and told me that he only had one, too. 904 01:37:55,203 --> 01:37:57,122 But... But when... But when he... 905 01:38:09,759 --> 01:38:11,803 - She's staying? - Yes. 906 01:38:13,138 --> 01:38:15,807 - Can I stand? - Yes. 907 01:38:19,060 --> 01:38:22,188 Reach for the sky, O'Bannon! 908 01:38:22,564 --> 01:38:25,317 That's my line. He stole my gang, he's stealing my lines. 909 01:38:25,358 --> 01:38:26,943 - That's unbelievable. - Roy! Roy! 910 01:38:27,319 --> 01:38:28,653 Get back! 911 01:38:29,821 --> 01:38:31,156 Stop, stop. It's Wallace. 912 01:38:31,573 --> 01:38:32,949 Hey, ROY, 913 01:38:32,991 --> 01:38:36,661 we know you been moonlightin' on us with that old yellow fella from the train! 914 01:38:36,995 --> 01:38:38,747 You guys, you stay here. This isn't your battle. 915 01:38:39,414 --> 01:38:42,375 No, we stick together. We are partners. 916 01:38:45,295 --> 01:38:47,005 That's beautiful. 917 01:38:52,385 --> 01:38:53,595 You go out the back door. 918 01:38:54,179 --> 01:38:56,598 - No. - Don't worry, Princess. 919 01:38:56,681 --> 01:38:58,892 I promise you, I will see you again. 920 01:39:00,018 --> 01:39:02,187 That which you have promised, 921 01:39:02,729 --> 01:39:04,522 you must perform. 922 01:39:19,996 --> 01:39:21,206 - Get out of the way! - Why? 923 01:39:21,873 --> 01:39:23,667 - Come on! - Why? What are you... 924 01:39:25,543 --> 01:39:29,047 - What are you doing? Are you crazy? - No, John, stop, stop. 925 01:39:29,506 --> 01:39:31,007 They can't touch me. 926 01:39:31,049 --> 01:39:33,718 Something happened back there. it was a miracle. 927 01:39:33,802 --> 01:39:34,886 There's no way... 928 01:39:34,970 --> 01:39:36,930 Hey, smart-ass! Do you hear me? 929 01:39:37,347 --> 01:39:39,975 Time's up, O'Bannon! It's the end of the line! 930 01:39:40,308 --> 01:39:42,102 We can take these guys. 931 01:39:42,185 --> 01:39:43,645 Yep, we can take them. 932 01:39:44,270 --> 01:39:47,649 Are you comin' out or ain't you? 933 01:39:48,358 --> 01:39:49,401 Gun. 934 01:39:59,744 --> 01:40:02,247 You really are the Shanghai Kid. 935 01:40:05,583 --> 01:40:07,669 Nice riding with you, partner. 936 01:40:19,180 --> 01:40:21,224 We go out on three. I count. 937 01:40:21,766 --> 01:40:23,560 No, I count. 938 01:40:24,102 --> 01:40:26,021 We'll both count. 939 01:40:26,688 --> 01:40:29,315 One, two, three! 940 01:40:40,035 --> 01:40:43,621 - lndians! Look out! - No! My family! My family! 941 01:40:50,462 --> 01:40:53,131 - Friends. Brothers! Roy! 942 01:40:53,339 --> 01:40:58,136 I gotta tell ya, we always figured you for a dumbshit, 943 01:40:58,803 --> 01:41:01,848 but, uh, we was thinkin' maybe you wanna come back and rejoin the gang. 944 01:41:02,557 --> 01:41:05,351 - So, uh, what do you say? Yeah, what do you say? 945 01:41:05,435 --> 01:41:06,644 I think I'm just gonna wing it. 946 01:41:07,520 --> 01:41:08,646 All right. 947 01:41:08,730 --> 01:41:10,648 And you are goin' to jail. - That works, too. 948 01:41:14,486 --> 01:41:16,029 How, kimosabe! 949 01:41:16,404 --> 01:41:18,406 How, kimosabe! 950 01:41:28,416 --> 01:41:30,460 Oh, it's nice to be standing here next to you. 951 01:41:30,502 --> 01:41:33,129 I don't think I've ever gotten a chance to thank you for... 952 01:41:33,379 --> 01:41:36,049 For saving us so many times. 953 01:41:36,132 --> 01:41:39,511 I wish you could understand what... I feel like there's this gap between us. 954 01:41:39,594 --> 01:41:41,888 It's like, I'm a cowboy, you're an Indian. 955 01:41:41,971 --> 01:41:43,723 You say "Wampum," I say "money." 956 01:41:43,807 --> 01:41:45,475 At a certain point, I just think... 957 01:41:49,979 --> 01:41:52,232 Shut up, Roy. You talk too much. 958 01:41:52,857 --> 01:41:55,318 Did... Did... She just... 959 01:42:07,956 --> 01:42:12,377 There she is, right on time, carrying a big, fat payroll. 960 01:42:13,962 --> 01:42:16,506 Oh. 961 01:42:17,590 --> 01:42:19,843 I don't know if I'll ever get used to this one. 962 01:42:22,595 --> 01:42:24,222 Don't worry. You'll get used to it. 963 01:42:24,514 --> 01:42:27,142 I can guarantee you, we won't get half as many girls being lawmen. 964 01:42:27,225 --> 01:42:29,310 I know we're spoken for, but... 965 01:42:29,394 --> 01:42:31,396 You never know what's gonna happen in a relationship. 966 01:42:33,189 --> 01:42:36,651 I gotta get rid of my outlaw name. That's not gonna work anymore. 967 01:42:36,734 --> 01:42:39,445 Really? What would you call yourself? 968 01:42:40,405 --> 01:42:43,825 I don't know. I mean, my real name's Wyatt Earp, but... 969 01:42:44,159 --> 01:42:47,579 Earp? That's a terrible name for a cowboy. 970 01:42:47,620 --> 01:42:50,123 - Why? - Bad. 971 01:42:50,248 --> 01:42:51,624 - Really? - Bad! 972 01:42:51,749 --> 01:42:53,960 And John Wayne's a great cowboy name? 973 01:42:54,043 --> 01:42:55,170 Roy, look. 974 01:42:55,670 --> 01:42:56,921 There they are. 975 01:42:57,797 --> 01:43:01,759 Yep. Look at those amateurs. That's my move! 976 01:43:02,427 --> 01:43:04,596 Come on, Roy. Let's go say "howdy." 977 01:43:04,721 --> 01:43:06,723 Let's go! Hyah! Hyah! 978 01:43:06,764 --> 01:43:08,349 - Yee-haw! - Yee-haw! 979 01:43:16,274 --> 01:43:17,775 - Yee-haw! - Yee-haw! 980 01:43:24,949 --> 01:43:26,159 Scene up. 981 01:43:27,869 --> 01:43:31,372 That which you have promised, you must perform. 982 01:43:33,208 --> 01:43:35,126 Hello. 983 01:43:35,376 --> 01:43:37,879 He was part of your "rushimiant..." 984 01:43:37,962 --> 01:43:39,422 What? Regiment. 985 01:43:39,631 --> 01:43:41,382 He's one of your bandits. 986 01:43:41,466 --> 01:43:43,426 He's one of your... He's one of your... 987 01:43:43,635 --> 01:43:46,638 He was part of your regiment of "dentists." 988 01:43:46,679 --> 01:43:48,640 Bandits. Dentists? 989 01:43:52,769 --> 01:43:54,812 WOW! Shit! 990 01:43:59,275 --> 01:44:01,569 He didn't teeth brush this morning. 991 01:44:01,653 --> 01:44:04,072 - Lose this thing, too, I'm gonna cut off... - No! 992 01:44:09,869 --> 01:44:11,496 I can't do stunts, man. 993 01:44:11,829 --> 01:44:15,500 Because I'm gonna be a cowboy, baby 994 01:44:17,877 --> 01:44:20,630 What's this princess like? 995 01:44:26,386 --> 01:44:29,180 I got air bubbles coming out of my thing. 996 01:44:30,014 --> 01:44:31,557 Uno mas, please. 997 01:44:34,435 --> 01:44:37,814 Uno mas... 998 01:44:39,065 --> 01:44:40,692 Thanks, Fido. 999 01:44:55,456 --> 01:44:58,710 One, two, three! 1000 01:45:00,670 --> 01:45:02,171 Shit! 1001 01:45:06,843 --> 01:45:10,346 Thank you so much, Princess. You're so good. 1002 01:45:10,388 --> 01:45:13,766 Princess! Oh, I love you so much. 1003 01:45:14,058 --> 01:45:17,061 I'm talking to you! Turn around! 1004 01:45:17,145 --> 01:45:18,980 Ask me if I give a shit. 1005 01:45:29,407 --> 01:45:32,243 I might walk a little funny but my walk is me 1006 01:45:32,327 --> 01:45:34,954 I might stutter when I talk but I say what I see 1007 01:45:35,038 --> 01:45:37,915 I don't agree with every other little thing that's proven 1008 01:45:37,999 --> 01:45:40,710 I do a lot of things that I shouldn't be doin' 1009 01:45:40,752 --> 01:45:43,212 I ruin everything you might've had in mind 1010 01:45:43,254 --> 01:45:46,174 I'm a consistent, belligerent solidified mind 1011 01:45:46,257 --> 01:45:48,718 Rhinestone freak Suburban style 1012 01:45:48,760 --> 01:45:51,679 I ain't got no money and I got no car 1013 01:45:51,763 --> 01:45:54,265 I might make par if it don't take much 1014 01:45:54,307 --> 01:45:57,060 I gotta ride very far 'cause I ride on luck 1015 01:45:57,101 --> 01:45:59,604 I stay pretty stuck in a rut like I should 1016 01:45:59,687 --> 01:46:02,607 And I do it for the love of everything's that's still good 1017 01:46:02,690 --> 01:46:05,026 I don't know why I come here 1018 01:46:05,109 --> 01:46:08,071 But I know I'll never leave 1019 01:46:08,112 --> 01:46:10,948 It's the only place I wanna be 1020 01:46:11,032 --> 01:46:13,409 Yeah, yeah, yeah 1021 01:46:13,451 --> 01:46:15,870 I don't know why I come here 1022 01:46:15,953 --> 01:46:18,956 But I know I'll never leave 1023 01:46:18,998 --> 01:46:21,793 It's the only place I wanna be 1024 01:46:21,834 --> 01:46:24,379 Yeah, yeah, yeah 1025 01:46:35,139 --> 01:46:37,725 I'm a long way gone but I ain't short-lived 1026 01:46:37,809 --> 01:46:40,728 I got knee-deep pockets that leak like a sieve 1027 01:46:40,812 --> 01:46:43,231 I give one tenth throughout the course of the night 1028 01:46:43,314 --> 01:46:45,983 And if I don't go home then I did things right 1029 01:46:46,067 --> 01:46:48,653 I'd like to settle down but I ain't that guy 1030 01:46:48,694 --> 01:46:51,656 'Cause everything I ever did I always did on the fly 1031 01:46:51,739 --> 01:46:54,158 I stay stuck in the rut like I should 1032 01:46:54,200 --> 01:46:57,078 You know, I do it for the love of everything that's still good 1033 01:46:57,161 --> 01:46:59,497 I don't know why I come here 1034 01:46:59,539 --> 01:47:02,625 But I know I'll never leave 1035 01:47:02,667 --> 01:47:05,294 It's the only place I wanna be 1036 01:47:05,336 --> 01:47:08,005 Yeah, yeah, yeah