1 00:00:01,502 --> 00:00:03,502 ♪ I'M EVERY WOMAN 2 00:00:03,570 --> 00:00:05,771 ♪ IT'S ALL IN ME 3 00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:08,673 ♪ ANYTHING YOU WANT DONE, BABY 4 00:00:08,742 --> 00:00:10,675 ♪ I'LL DO IT NATURALLY 5 00:00:10,744 --> 00:00:12,578 ♪ I'M EVERY... 6 00:00:12,646 --> 00:00:16,981 ♪ WOMAN, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH ♪ 7 00:00:18,419 --> 00:00:19,484 SHE'S GOT SPUNK. 8 00:00:19,553 --> 00:00:21,886 SHE'S GOT TEEN TART WRITTEN ALL OVER HER. 9 00:00:21,955 --> 00:00:25,590 LIBERTY, ABOUT YOUR FUTURE AS A TEEN TART, 10 00:00:25,659 --> 00:00:26,792 YOU'RE IN, GIRLFRIEND! 11 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,927 OH, MY GOD! THANK YOU SO MUCH! 12 00:00:28,995 --> 00:00:30,762 YEAH! 13 00:00:30,831 --> 00:00:34,299 - [LIBERTY] OH! - NEXT UP: MARY CHERRY! 14 00:00:38,004 --> 00:00:39,070 HI, Y'ALL. 15 00:00:39,140 --> 00:00:40,305 [SYSTEM HUMS] 16 00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:41,806 CAN I JUST TELL YOU 17 00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,475 THAT I LOVE TEEN TARTZ 18 00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:46,978 AND THAT I WOULD DO ANYTHING TO BE A TEEN TART. 19 00:00:47,048 --> 00:00:49,348 - ANYTHING. - MARY CHERRY, 20 00:00:49,416 --> 00:00:50,815 BEFORE WE BEGIN, 21 00:00:50,884 --> 00:00:53,918 LET ME TELL YOU A BIT ABOUT OUR CONTEST. 22 00:00:53,987 --> 00:00:57,056 WE ARE NOT PUTTING TOGETHER A MUSICAL GROUP. 23 00:00:57,124 --> 00:01:00,492 NOR ARE WE TRYING FOR THE DESTINY'S CHILD THING. 24 00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:02,827 NOT AT ALL. IF I MAY? 25 00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:07,132 WE ARE SIMPLY LOOKING FOR OUR NATION'S MOST TALENTED BOYS AND GIRLS. 26 00:01:07,201 --> 00:01:09,768 WE WILL HAVE WINNERS IN CATEGORIES THAT WE CALL 27 00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:13,172 "WHORISH MODELS" AND "LOOSE AND EASY BATON TWIRLERS." 28 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:15,507 BUT FIRST COMES THE VOCAL COMPETITION. 29 00:01:15,576 --> 00:01:18,843 WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SING FOR US TODAY, MARY CHERRY? 30 00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:22,848 "ROCK ME AMADEUS" BY FALCO. 31 00:01:25,886 --> 00:01:28,987 - [SYNTHESIZER MUSIC] - ♪ OOH, ROCK ME, AMADEUS 32 00:01:29,055 --> 00:01:32,724 - [MUSIC CONTINUES] - [MARY CHERRY LIP SYNCHS] 33 00:01:36,097 --> 00:01:38,897 ♪ WUN-WUN-WUNDERBAR, WUNDERBAR 34 00:01:41,235 --> 00:01:46,871 ♪ OOH, OOOH-OOH, OOH, OOH 35 00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:49,408 [FALCO'S VOICE] 1756, SALZBURG, JANUARY 27, 36 00:01:49,476 --> 00:01:50,975 WOLFGANG AMADEUS IS BORN. 37 00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:55,814 1761: AT THE AGE OF FIVE, AMADEUS BEGINS COMPOSING. 38 00:01:58,218 --> 00:02:01,520 1782: WOLFGANG AMADEUS MOZART MARRIES CONSTANCE WEBER. 39 00:02:03,089 --> 00:02:06,391 1791: MOZART COMPOSES THE MAGIC FLUTE. 40 00:02:08,829 --> 00:02:11,730 ON DECEMBER 5 OF THAT SAME YEAR, MOZART DIES. 41 00:02:13,934 --> 00:02:17,068 1985: AUSTRIAN ROCK SINGER FALCO RECORDS 42 00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:18,537 ♪ ROCK ME AMADEUS 43 00:02:18,605 --> 00:02:21,072 ♪ AMADEUS, AMADEUS, AMADEUS... 44 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:22,774 [MUSIC FADES] 45 00:02:22,843 --> 00:02:26,878 COULD YOU STAND ON THAT STAR SO WE CAN SPEAK PRIVATELY? 46 00:02:26,947 --> 00:02:28,279 JUST RIGHT THERE? 47 00:02:30,384 --> 00:02:32,951 SHE'S LIKE SOME CRAZY HOMELESS PERSON THAT WANDERED IN. 48 00:02:33,019 --> 00:02:34,653 SHOULD WE CALL SECURITY? 49 00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:38,823 LOONY OR NOT, SHE'S NOT TEEN TARTZ MATERIAL. 50 00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:41,926 MARY CHERRY, ABOUT YOUR FUTURE WITH TEEN TARTZ... 51 00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:43,795 OH, MY GOD! I MADE IT! 52 00:02:43,864 --> 00:02:46,798 I'M GONNA BE A STAR! THANK YOU ALL! 53 00:02:46,867 --> 00:02:49,133 UM, THAT'S NOT QUITE TRUE. 54 00:02:49,202 --> 00:02:53,272 UM, WE REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT YOU JUST DON'T HAVE WHAT IT TAKES... 55 00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:55,206 TO BE A TEEN TART. 56 00:02:55,276 --> 00:02:57,008 OH. 57 00:02:57,077 --> 00:02:59,978 OKAY. WELL, THAT'S HOW IT'S GONNA BE. 58 00:03:00,046 --> 00:03:05,484 FINE. I KNOW YOU JUDGES ARE ALL JUST JEALOUS OF MY TIGHT TEEN ASS! 59 00:03:05,552 --> 00:03:08,753 JUST KNOW ONE THING, TEEN TARTZ JUDGES. 60 00:03:08,822 --> 00:03:11,890 WITH OR WITHOUT YOU, I'M GONNA MAKE IT. 61 00:03:13,359 --> 00:03:17,729 I'M GONNA BE FAMOUS IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO! 62 00:03:25,939 --> 00:03:28,540 ♪ THINK IT OVER ONCE OR TWICE 63 00:03:28,609 --> 00:03:31,210 ♪ WHAT LASTS THE LONGEST IN THIS LIFE 64 00:03:31,278 --> 00:03:35,514 ♪ CHARACTER OR ROCK-HARD THIGHS 65 00:03:35,582 --> 00:03:37,849 ♪ IN THE END DO YOU BELIEVE 66 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:40,619 ♪ THAT BEAUTY LIES IN WHAT YOU SEE 67 00:03:40,688 --> 00:03:42,621 ♪ 'CAUSE IF YOU DO, THEN, BABY 68 00:03:42,690 --> 00:03:44,055 ♪ YOU'VE BEEN DECEIVED 69 00:03:44,124 --> 00:03:47,726 ♪ WELL, ME AND B 70 00:03:47,794 --> 00:03:49,894 ♪ WE HATE SUPERMODELS 71 00:03:55,302 --> 00:04:00,539 ♪ IT'S JUST THAT I'M TIRED OF BEING COMPARED ♪ 72 00:04:06,112 --> 00:04:07,879 [YAWNING] 73 00:04:07,948 --> 00:04:10,114 OKAY, ANALOGIES. 74 00:04:10,183 --> 00:04:12,350 GOOD FOR OVER 400 POINTS ON THE VERBAL. 75 00:04:12,418 --> 00:04:14,352 I'VE BEEN WORKING ON THOSE. ANALOGIES? 76 00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:17,088 AND THE THING IS, THEY'RE STUPID. 77 00:04:17,157 --> 00:04:19,724 - THEY DON'T MAKE ANY SENSE. - YES, THEY DO, JOSH. 78 00:04:19,793 --> 00:04:21,225 REMEMBER? 79 00:04:21,295 --> 00:04:24,363 ♪ ONE OF THESE THINGS IS NOT LIKE THE OTHER 80 00:04:24,431 --> 00:04:27,999 ♪ ONE OF THESE THINGS JUST DOESN'T BELONG ♪ 81 00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:30,702 NO? 82 00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:32,303 OKAY. 83 00:04:32,373 --> 00:04:34,539 MATH. LET'S MOVE ON TO MATH PROBLEMS. 84 00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:36,808 ARE YOU SURE YOU GET THE ANALOGIES CONCEPT? 85 00:04:36,877 --> 00:04:38,477 THIS IS IMPORTANT. 86 00:04:38,545 --> 00:04:41,480 YOUR WHOLE FUTURE COULD DEPEND ON HOW WELL YOU DO ON THE S.A.T. 87 00:04:41,548 --> 00:04:43,282 IT'LL AFFECT WHAT SCHOOL YOU GET INTO 88 00:04:43,350 --> 00:04:47,052 AND MAYBE EVEN WHAT COMPANY HIRES YOU AFTER YOU GRADUATE. 89 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:49,120 DON'T BRUSH IT OFF IF YOU DON'T GET IT. 90 00:04:49,189 --> 00:04:51,156 NO, I GOT IT. LET'S DO THE NUMBERS. 91 00:04:51,224 --> 00:04:52,924 OKAY, HERE YOU GO. 92 00:04:52,993 --> 00:04:55,994 "TWO TRAINS FROM BOSTON AND NEW YORK ARE TRAVELING TOWARDS EACH OTHER. 93 00:04:56,062 --> 00:04:58,563 "THE BOSTON TRAIN IS GOING 75 MILES PER HOUR 94 00:04:58,632 --> 00:04:59,931 "FOR THE FIRST 30 MINUTES, 95 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:02,367 "ACCELERATING TO 80 IN THE NEXT 30 MINUTES. 96 00:05:02,436 --> 00:05:04,669 "THE NEW YORK TRAIN IS GOING 82 MILES PER HOUR..." 97 00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:07,772 - [TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING] - [BROOKE'S VOICE FADING] 98 00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:12,243 [TRAIN WHISTLES GROWING LOUDER] 99 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:14,613 [TRAINS CRASHING] 100 00:05:17,885 --> 00:05:19,984 OH, HEY, MARY CHERRY. MUCH REGRETS. 101 00:05:20,053 --> 00:05:22,654 RUMOR HAS IT THAT YOU WERE REJECTED BY TEEN TARTZ, 102 00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:23,988 MUCH THE WAY THAT I, 103 00:05:24,057 --> 00:05:26,024 NEWLY CROWNED PRESIDENT AND RULER OF "BRING IT," 104 00:05:26,092 --> 00:05:27,859 HAVE REJECTED YOU ON EVERY LEVEL. 105 00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:30,161 YES, YES, IT'S TRUE, MADAME PRESIDENT. 106 00:05:30,230 --> 00:05:33,264 UNLIKE YOU, I'M AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SOCIAL HEAP. 107 00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:35,600 BUT I HAVE SOMETHING TO OFFER. 108 00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:39,938 A MEANS BY WHICH TO CLAW MY WAY BACK AND PROVE MY VALUE. 109 00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:41,606 YOUR MONEY? 110 00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:45,110 NO. NO, I'M RESURRECTING KENNEDY HIGH'S INTEREST 111 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:47,679 IN THE WORLD OF ACADEMIC DECATHLONS. 112 00:05:47,748 --> 00:05:50,315 YOU'RE PUTTING TOGETHER A TEAM FOR THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE? 113 00:05:50,384 --> 00:05:53,585 BROADCAST EVERY SATURDAY AFTERNOON ON CABLE ACCESS. 114 00:05:53,654 --> 00:05:55,954 I'LL BE SEEN BY "DOZE-ENS." 115 00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:57,689 DON'T YOU HAVE TO BE SMART TO BE ON THE BIG HEAD? 116 00:05:57,758 --> 00:06:00,258 WHO NEEDS SMARTS WHEN YOU'RE GETTING EXPOSURE? 117 00:06:00,326 --> 00:06:01,860 WANNA JOIN UP? YEAH. 118 00:06:01,928 --> 00:06:05,597 SPACE IS LIMITED AND AT MY INTELLECTUAL DISCRETION. 119 00:06:05,666 --> 00:06:08,700 YOU KNOW, IF YOU DID JOIN UP, NIC, 120 00:06:08,769 --> 00:06:13,538 IT COULD BE A WAY FOR YOU AND I TO BURY THE HATCHET AND END OUR BLOOD GRUDGE. 121 00:06:13,607 --> 00:06:15,540 WE COULD BE BEST FRIENDS AGAIN. 122 00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:16,742 [MIMICS LAUGH] 123 00:06:16,810 --> 00:06:18,343 I THINK I'LL PASS. 124 00:06:18,412 --> 00:06:21,012 WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. JUST FORGET ABOUT ME. OKAY? 125 00:06:21,081 --> 00:06:24,115 IF YOU DID THE CHALLENGE, IT COULD BE A WAY FOR YOU 126 00:06:24,184 --> 00:06:26,117 TO COMMUNICATE TO THE WORLD YOUR VALUE-- 127 00:06:26,186 --> 00:06:29,754 YOUR RUTHLESS EXCESSES AND MANIPULATIVE SMARTS. 128 00:06:29,823 --> 00:06:31,823 IT'D BE BETTER THAN ANY CORONATION. 129 00:06:31,892 --> 00:06:34,893 YOU'D BE IN THE SHADOWS NO MORE, LADY. 130 00:06:34,961 --> 00:06:38,663 - WE'LL NEED A FACULTY SPONSOR. - GREAT! 131 00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:44,269 I'M SORRY. I SHOULD HAVE CALLED TO TELL YOU I WAS BLOWING OFF THE S.A.T. STUDY GROUP. 132 00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:46,738 IT'S JUST... I'VE GOT A GOOD REASON. 133 00:06:46,807 --> 00:06:50,241 I'VE CHANGED MY MIND ABOUT THE S.A.T.s. I'M GONNA TAKE THEM NEXT FALL. 134 00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:54,112 I THINK I'D RATHER DEVOTE MY TIME THAT I WOULD HAVE DEVOTED TO STUDYING 135 00:06:54,180 --> 00:06:56,080 TO TAKING SALSA LESSONS. 136 00:06:56,149 --> 00:06:58,016 CARMEN! 137 00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:01,986 YOUR MIND AND YOUR ACADEMIC ACHIEVEMENT ARE A LITTLE MORE IMPORTANT 138 00:07:02,055 --> 00:07:04,222 THAN... SHAKING YOUR BON-BON. 139 00:07:04,291 --> 00:07:06,024 PLEASE DON'T JUDGE, LIL. 140 00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:07,859 I KNOW IT'S A LITTLE BIT UNORTHODOX, 141 00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:11,462 BUT I REALLY THINK THAT I COULD BETTER COMMUNICATE MY VALUE TO THE WORLD 142 00:07:11,532 --> 00:07:15,767 THROUGH DANCING THAN BY PULLING SOME AVERAGE SCORE ON SOME STUPID TEST. 143 00:07:15,836 --> 00:07:18,770 EXCUSE ME, LADIES. CAN I INTERRUPT? 144 00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:20,438 YEAH, I WAS JUST LEAVING. 145 00:07:20,506 --> 00:07:22,040 SEE YOU LATER, LIL. 146 00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:24,042 LILY, I'M HAVING TROUBLE WITH THIS QUESTION. 147 00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:26,044 CAN YOU HELP ME WITH THE ANSWER? 148 00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:28,747 OH, JOSH, I CAN'T HELP YOU RIGHT NOW. 149 00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:33,151 WHAT IF I GIVE YOU A BABY HICKY IN A SECRET PLACE? 150 00:07:33,220 --> 00:07:36,087 JOSH, I CANNOT MAKE OUT WITH YOU RIGHT NOW. 151 00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:37,588 THEN LET'S STUDY TOGETHER. 152 00:07:37,658 --> 00:07:40,224 I THINK THAT I SHOULD STUDY BY MYSELF. 153 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:44,329 I'VE BEEN SPENDING SO MUCH TIME HELPING YOU WITH YOUR S.A.T. PREP 154 00:07:44,397 --> 00:07:49,601 THAT I'M IGNORING MINE, AND I HAVE TO DO WELL ON THOSE TESTS TO GET MY SCHOLARSHIP. 155 00:07:49,670 --> 00:07:54,806 SO, YOU DON'T WANT TO STUDY WITH ME BECAUSE YOU THINK I'M DUMB? 156 00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:58,176 - NO. THAT'S NOT IT. I JUST THINK THAT... - I'M DUMB. 157 00:07:58,244 --> 00:08:01,913 NO, DON'T SAY THAT ABOUT YOURSELF, 'CAUSE I DON'T THINK YOU'RE DENSE. 158 00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:05,116 I DIDN'T SAY DENSE. I SAID DUMB. 159 00:08:07,287 --> 00:08:10,688 OKAY. WE'LL PICK THIS UP AT A LATER TIME. 160 00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:19,163 LISTEN UP, PEOPLE! DUE TO MY OVERWHELMING SENSE OF SCHOOL SPIRIT 161 00:08:19,232 --> 00:08:24,002 AND MY SUDDEN ADMIRATION FOR THE INTELLECTUAL CAPABILITY OF MARY CHERRY, 162 00:08:24,071 --> 00:08:26,805 I HAVE AGREED TO SPONSOR KENNEDY HIGH'S ENTRY 163 00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:28,640 INTO THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE. 164 00:08:28,709 --> 00:08:30,975 THERE ARE ONLY FIVE PLACES ON THE TEAM. 165 00:08:31,044 --> 00:08:33,344 THE POSITION OF CAPTAIN AND CO-CAPTAIN 166 00:08:33,413 --> 00:08:34,746 HAVE BEEN FILLED. 167 00:08:34,815 --> 00:08:38,783 LEADING OUR TEAM WILL BE THE LOVELY AND TALENTED MARY CHERRY. 168 00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:40,919 HOW DID SHE GET TO BE CAPTAIN? 169 00:08:40,987 --> 00:08:42,586 ISN'T SHE BORDERLINE RETARDED? 170 00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:46,490 THE OTHER CO-CAPTAIN IS OUR VERY OWN ANSWER TO LUCREZIA BORGIA, 171 00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:48,259 MISS NICOLE JULIAN. 172 00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:51,462 THAT LEAVES ONLY THREE CHANCES OF GLORY TO THE REST OF YOU. 173 00:08:51,532 --> 00:08:53,031 NOW, TO SUCCEED, 174 00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:54,565 YOU'LL HAVE TO FOCUS. 175 00:08:54,634 --> 00:08:58,069 YOU'LL HAVE TO STUDY LIKE YOU NEVER DO FOR MY CLASS. 176 00:08:58,138 --> 00:09:00,371 IF YOU LOSE, YOU'LL BE HUMILIATED ON TELEVISION, 177 00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:02,173 ALIENATED BY YOUR FRIENDS, 178 00:09:02,242 --> 00:09:04,843 AND EMBARRASSED FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIVES. 179 00:09:04,911 --> 00:09:08,379 SO, WHO'S IN, Y'ALL? 180 00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:11,750 [GLASS CLEARS HER THROAT] OKAY. MOVING ON. ROLL CALL! 181 00:09:11,818 --> 00:09:13,517 - MARY CHERRY! - PRESIDENT. 182 00:09:13,587 --> 00:09:16,921 - CHERRY CHERRY. - WORD! 183 00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:19,724 MAMA CHERRY? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 184 00:09:19,793 --> 00:09:22,661 IT'S NATIONAL WEIGH YOUR DAUGHTER DAY. HAVEN'T YOU HEARD? 185 00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:26,664 AND I DROPPED BY TO SEE THAT SCALE MOAN IN AGONY. 186 00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:29,334 SERIOUSLY, SAY HELLO TO YOUR NEWEST CLASSMATE. 187 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:31,235 MISS CHERRY, WHAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND 188 00:09:31,304 --> 00:09:34,973 IS WHY A WOMAN WHO HAS CREATED A MULTIBILLION-DOLLAR EMPIRE 189 00:09:35,041 --> 00:09:37,675 WOULD WANT TO COME BACK TO HIGH SCHOOL. 190 00:09:37,743 --> 00:09:41,245 THEY SAY YOU'RE NEVER TOO OLD TO LEARN. I KEPT PUTTING IT OFF. 191 00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:44,883 THE NUMBERS I PULLED ON MY S.A.T.s HAVE COME BACK TO HAUNT ME. 192 00:09:44,952 --> 00:09:46,717 KIDS! LOOK TO ME, 193 00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:49,020 THE RICHEST AND MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN ALIVE, 194 00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:51,056 AS AN ACADEMIC CAUTIONARY TALE. 195 00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:52,791 Y'ALL MAY NOT KNOW THIS, 196 00:09:52,859 --> 00:09:56,160 BUT SCORING LESS THAN 50 POINTS ON THAT TEST CAN RUIN YOU SOCIALLY. 197 00:09:56,229 --> 00:09:58,697 YOU GET 200 POINTS FOR SPELLING YOUR NAME RIGHT. 198 00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:00,198 I PANICKED! 199 00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:03,001 MAMA, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. 200 00:10:03,070 --> 00:10:05,569 YOU'VE KNOWN THE FEELING OF SHAME? 201 00:10:05,639 --> 00:10:08,606 YES, DAUGHTER OF MINE, TWICE IN MY LIFETIME. 202 00:10:08,674 --> 00:10:12,010 THE FIRST WAS WHEN YOU WERE BORN AND I WENT TO DIAPER YOU, 203 00:10:12,078 --> 00:10:16,547 ONLY TO BE TOLD BY A NURSE THAT I WAS PUTTING TOO MUCH POWDER ON YOUR FACE. 204 00:10:16,617 --> 00:10:19,350 THE SECOND TIME OCCURRED JUST A FEW DAYS AGO 205 00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:22,353 AS I WAS APPLYING FOR A COUNTRY CLUB MEMBERSHIP. 206 00:10:22,422 --> 00:10:24,388 [MUTTERING] 207 00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:27,859 THE SHOES, THE SHOES. THE SHOES, THE SHOES. 208 00:10:27,928 --> 00:10:31,462 MISS CHERRY, IT SEEMS SOMEBODY ONLY GOT A TOTAL SCORE OF... 209 00:10:31,531 --> 00:10:33,131 50 ON THEIR S.A.T.s. 210 00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:35,766 I SCORED HIGHER ON MY PROSTATE EXAM. 211 00:10:35,835 --> 00:10:38,236 SO DID I, AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE A PROSTATE. 212 00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:41,072 I'M SORRY. YOU'RE JUST NOT COUNTRY CLUB MATERIAL. 213 00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,676 THAT REJECTION STUNG LIKE A BEE. 214 00:10:45,746 --> 00:10:48,512 IN A WEEK, I'M RETAKING THAT DAMN TEST, 215 00:10:48,581 --> 00:10:51,650 AND AS GOD IS MY WITNESS, I'M BREAKING 100. 216 00:10:51,718 --> 00:10:55,419 I PLAN ON PROVING THAT THERE'S NOTHING A PERSON CAN'T ACCOMPLISH 217 00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:58,156 WITH PERSEVERANCE AND LOTS OF CASH. 218 00:10:58,224 --> 00:11:00,291 SO, GET TEACHING, BOBBI GLASS. 219 00:11:01,361 --> 00:11:03,128 - WHAT'S UP, DUDE? - HEY. 220 00:11:03,196 --> 00:11:05,063 CRAMMING FOR THE S.A.T.s? 221 00:11:05,132 --> 00:11:06,530 YEAH. WHY AREN'T YOU? 222 00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:09,033 HONESTLY, I AM WHACKED WITH TOO MUCH ANXIETY. 223 00:11:09,102 --> 00:11:11,936 THIS WHOLE THING ABOUT THE S.A.T.s IS FREAKING ME OUT, 224 00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:15,839 LISTENING TO CHERRY CHERRY'S STORY OF HOW HER SCORE AFFECTED HER WHOLE LIFE. 225 00:11:15,908 --> 00:11:19,010 IF I DON'T START DOING BETTER, LILY MIGHT DROP ME. 226 00:11:19,079 --> 00:11:23,381 WHAT'S YOUR FEAR? LILY'S GONNA MOVE ON IF YOU GET A LOW S.A.T. SCORE? 227 00:11:23,449 --> 00:11:25,383 I REALLY THINK SHE MIGHT, HARRISON. 228 00:11:25,451 --> 00:11:27,518 MAYBE IT'S NOT ENOUGH THAT I'M HOT. 229 00:11:27,587 --> 00:11:29,988 OKAY. UH, LET'S BREAK IT DOWN. 230 00:11:30,056 --> 00:11:32,623 WHAT SECTION OF THE S.A.T.s YOU HAVING TROUBLE WITH? 231 00:11:32,693 --> 00:11:34,826 IT'S THE ANSWERS, MAN. 232 00:11:34,895 --> 00:11:36,227 I SEE. 233 00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:37,896 UH, OKAY. 234 00:11:37,964 --> 00:11:41,232 MAYBE THERE'S A WAY THAT YOU CAN STUDY FOR THE S.A.T.s 235 00:11:41,301 --> 00:11:44,002 AND IMPRESS LILY WITH YOUR INTELLIGENCE AT THE SAME TIME. 236 00:11:44,070 --> 00:11:45,036 HOW? 237 00:11:45,105 --> 00:11:47,906 HOW ABOUT TAKING THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE? 238 00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:50,808 [YAWNS] 239 00:11:50,877 --> 00:11:52,210 OH, BROOKE. 240 00:11:52,278 --> 00:11:54,378 HOW MUCH LONGER CAN THIS GO ON? 241 00:11:54,447 --> 00:11:58,349 SEEING JAMIE EVERY NIGHT, WAKING UP EVERY MORNING TO STUDY. THANK YOU. 242 00:11:58,418 --> 00:12:00,251 DRAGGING YOURSELF THROUGH SCHOOL, 243 00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:02,353 "BRING IT" PRACTICE IN THE AFTERNOON. 244 00:12:02,422 --> 00:12:04,788 - I KNOW, SOMETHING'S GOT TO GIVE. - YES. 245 00:12:04,857 --> 00:12:07,959 BUT I THINK I MAY HAVE FOUND A SOLUTION. 246 00:12:08,028 --> 00:12:11,095 MISS GLASS HAS ARRANGED THAT IF YOU JOIN THE CHALLENGE, 247 00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:13,864 YOU GET OUT OF CLASS ALL WEEK TO STUDY. 248 00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:17,501 AND STUDYING FOR THE CHALLENGE IS LIKE STUDYING FOR THE S.A.T. 249 00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:20,038 NET RESULT: WE GET TO SLEEP IN. 250 00:12:20,941 --> 00:12:22,440 OOH, WHERE'S MARY CHERRY? 251 00:12:22,508 --> 00:12:23,608 AH! 252 00:12:26,012 --> 00:12:28,212 THANKS FOR TUTORING MY MIND, BOBBI GLASS. 253 00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:31,549 200 BUCKS A FLASH CARD? HOW COULD I RESIST? 254 00:12:31,617 --> 00:12:34,185 X PLUS 3 EQUALS 6. 255 00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:35,753 WHAT IS X? 256 00:12:35,822 --> 00:12:37,388 - TWO BILLION DOLLARS. - NO. 257 00:12:37,457 --> 00:12:40,024 X EQUALS 3. MISS CHERRY, PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME 258 00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:43,928 WHY A WOMAN WHO RUNS A WORLDWIDE CONGLOMERATE DOESN'T KNOW SIMPLE ADDITION? 259 00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:45,930 I KNOW IT, SLAVE DRIVER. 260 00:12:45,999 --> 00:12:47,966 THE PROBLEM IS, WELL, 261 00:12:48,034 --> 00:12:51,669 THAT COUNTRY CLUB TURN-DOWN HAS SHATTERED MY USUAL MONOLITHIC CONFIDENCE. 262 00:12:51,737 --> 00:12:55,806 WHEN MY CONFIDENCE IS LOW, AS ALL MY EX-HUSBANDS WILL TELL YOU, I CHOKE. 263 00:12:55,876 --> 00:12:57,876 DAMN, THIS IS A PICKLE, AIN'T IT? 264 00:12:57,944 --> 00:13:00,278 THE MOST CONFIDENT AND SUCCESSFUL WOMAN IN THE WORLD 265 00:13:00,346 --> 00:13:02,713 RENDERED AN EMOTIONAL AND INTELLECTUAL CRIPPLE 266 00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:05,816 BY WORTHLESS S.A.T. TRIVIA THAT MEANS DIDDLE! 267 00:13:05,886 --> 00:13:09,553 IF ALL YOU WANT IS TO PROVE YOU'RE SMART TO THOSE COUNTRY CLUB JUDGERS, 268 00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:11,456 FORGET ABOUT THE S.A.T.s, MISS CHERRY. 269 00:13:11,524 --> 00:13:14,592 - SHOW OFF ON TV. - [GASPS] GOOD IDEA. 270 00:13:14,660 --> 00:13:17,395 I HOPE TEMPTATION ISLAND 2 IS NOT SHOOTING NEXT WEEK. 271 00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,663 THAT CONFLICTS WITH MY ANNUAL PAP SMEAR. 272 00:13:19,732 --> 00:13:21,933 I'M TALKING ABOUT JOINING OUR BIG HEAD CHALLENGE. 273 00:13:22,002 --> 00:13:25,536 THOSE LIZ TAYLOR EYES OF YOURS SURE WOULD LOOK GOOD UNDER THE LIGHTS. 274 00:13:25,605 --> 00:13:26,971 WELL, THAT'S TRUE. 275 00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:29,974 WHO DO I HAVE TO BRIBE TO TAKE THIS CHALLENGE? 276 00:13:30,043 --> 00:13:31,842 YOU KNOW HER VERY WELL. 277 00:13:45,625 --> 00:13:47,225 [SHOUTING] 278 00:13:54,534 --> 00:13:56,200 [SCREAMING] 279 00:13:59,705 --> 00:14:01,439 [BARKING] 280 00:14:03,643 --> 00:14:07,946 OOH, THERE YOU ARE, MY LITTLE TREASURE! 281 00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:12,617 OKAY, LOOK. I WANT TO SIGN UP FOR THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE. 282 00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:13,984 WAIT! ME, TOO! 283 00:14:14,054 --> 00:14:16,154 I'M HER MOTHER. 284 00:14:16,222 --> 00:14:18,656 I'M HER... WELL, I SORT OF KNOW HER. 285 00:14:19,592 --> 00:14:22,160 - VERY WELL! - GOOD! 286 00:14:22,228 --> 00:14:25,029 HMM. WELL. THERE'S ONLY ONE SLOT LEFT. 287 00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:30,534 LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S GONNA BE DOING SOME SERIOUS ASS-KISSIN'! HA! 288 00:14:35,342 --> 00:14:36,640 FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT. 289 00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:39,076 ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, 290 00:14:39,145 --> 00:14:41,245 FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT. 291 00:14:41,314 --> 00:14:43,714 ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR 292 00:14:43,783 --> 00:14:46,250 FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT. 293 00:14:46,319 --> 00:14:48,752 ONE, TWO... AY, NO. YOU ARE TERRIBLE. 294 00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:52,490 YOU ARE THINKING SO MUCH ABOUT THE STEPS, YOU CANNOT FEEL THEM. 295 00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:55,660 I WATCH YOU DANCE, AND I RELIVE MY BIRTH TRAUMA. 296 00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,096 PLEASE, LET ME GIVE YOU YOUR MONEY BACK. 297 00:14:58,164 --> 00:15:01,032 NO, I DON'T WANT MY MONEY BACK. 298 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:02,966 I WANT TO LEARN TO DANCE. 299 00:15:03,035 --> 00:15:04,468 AY. 300 00:15:04,537 --> 00:15:05,904 ALL RIGHT. 301 00:15:05,972 --> 00:15:08,506 WE SAY A BIG PRAYER, AND WE TRY ANOTHER WAY. 302 00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:12,643 MAYBE YOU WILL DO GOOD WITH A PARTNER. PABLO. 303 00:15:12,712 --> 00:15:14,778 I WILL LEAVE YOU WITH MY NEPHEW. 304 00:15:14,847 --> 00:15:19,717 HE DOESN'T SPEAK ANY ENGLISH, BUT HE HAS THE MUSIC IN HIS BLOOD. 305 00:15:19,786 --> 00:15:20,851 OKAY? 306 00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:28,126 [SALSA MUSIC] 307 00:15:37,303 --> 00:15:40,671 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 308 00:15:47,147 --> 00:15:50,281 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 309 00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:58,756 ALL RIGHT! 310 00:15:58,824 --> 00:16:00,491 HE SAID HE WILL TRY. 311 00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:06,464 BUENO. 312 00:16:12,338 --> 00:16:15,773 I CAN'T BELIEVE MARY'S FORCING ME INTO A RUNOFF WITH HER MOTHER. 313 00:16:15,841 --> 00:16:19,443 YOU HEARD CHERRY CHERRY. SHE ONLY GOT A 50 ON HER S.A.T.s. 314 00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:21,912 YOU GOT AN EVEN CHANCE OF BEATING HER. 315 00:16:21,982 --> 00:16:26,284 IF I DON'T, LILY'S GONNA THINK I'M DUMBER THAN A BOX OF HAIR. 316 00:16:26,352 --> 00:16:29,253 DO YOU THINK THEY'RE GONNA ASK ME QUESTIONS ABOUT ASTROLOGY? 317 00:16:30,356 --> 00:16:32,623 THAT'S A GEOMETRIC DIAGRAM, JOSH. 318 00:16:32,692 --> 00:16:34,124 THAT'S FOR STUDYING MATH. 319 00:16:34,194 --> 00:16:36,727 FROM LAST YEAR? REMEMBER? 320 00:16:36,796 --> 00:16:40,698 UM, FOUR TRIANGLES, TANGENT ON A SINGLE POINT, 321 00:16:40,766 --> 00:16:43,734 FORMS A FOUR-SIDED PARALLELOGRAM? 322 00:16:43,803 --> 00:16:46,337 OH, OKAY, ROCK ON. I KNEW THAT. 323 00:16:46,406 --> 00:16:47,705 YEAH. 324 00:16:53,013 --> 00:16:53,944 OKAY. 325 00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:57,848 UGH! 326 00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:13,030 UM, OKAY, MATH ISN'T WORKING. 327 00:17:13,098 --> 00:17:14,698 LET'S MOVE ON TO VERBAL. 328 00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:16,500 - ALL RIGHT? - HARRISON, YOU'RE SMART. 329 00:17:16,569 --> 00:17:18,869 WHY AREN'T YOU INTO THIS BIG HEAD THING? 330 00:17:18,938 --> 00:17:22,840 I DON'T THINK SAM AND I SHOULD BE ON THE SAME TEAM NOW. 331 00:17:22,908 --> 00:17:24,842 RIGHT. SORRY. I FORGOT. 332 00:17:24,910 --> 00:17:26,844 NO, IT'S COOL. 333 00:17:26,912 --> 00:17:28,012 AH... 334 00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:29,547 TELL YOU WHAT. 335 00:17:29,616 --> 00:17:33,016 I'LL, UH, I'LL READ THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE OUT LOUD. 336 00:17:33,085 --> 00:17:36,987 THEN I CAN ASK YOU QUESTIONS SO WE CAN TEST YOUR COMPREHENSION LEVEL 337 00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:39,123 AND HISTORY AT THE SAME TIME. 338 00:17:39,192 --> 00:17:42,192 OKAY? YEAH, SURE. CRANK IT OUT, MAN. 339 00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:43,561 OKAY. 340 00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:46,430 "WHEN IN THE COURSE OF HUMAN EVENTS... 341 00:17:46,499 --> 00:17:49,300 SE HACE NECESARIO PARA UN PUEBLO DISOLVAR..." 342 00:17:49,369 --> 00:17:52,736 [CONTINUES IN SPANISH] 343 00:17:52,805 --> 00:17:54,672 [SPEAKS SPANISH] 344 00:17:59,745 --> 00:18:01,845 I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING. 345 00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:04,615 BUT IT SOUNDS VERY SWEET. 346 00:18:04,684 --> 00:18:07,618 OYE... [SPANISH] 347 00:18:11,357 --> 00:18:13,757 DO YOU WANT ME TO HOLD YOU CLOSER? 348 00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:17,094 [MUSIC ENDS] 349 00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:18,562 BUENO. 350 00:18:18,631 --> 00:18:19,730 OH. 351 00:18:19,799 --> 00:18:21,699 ¿OTRA VEZ? 352 00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:22,733 AH! 353 00:18:25,538 --> 00:18:26,471 OKAY, CARMEN. 354 00:18:30,075 --> 00:18:31,041 YEAH, I DON'T... 355 00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:33,211 OH, UH... VEN AQUÍ. 356 00:18:35,215 --> 00:18:38,081 USTED, SÁBADO. HUH? 357 00:18:39,252 --> 00:18:42,085 YOU WANT TO GO OUT WITH ME ON SATURDAY? 358 00:18:42,154 --> 00:18:43,287 UM... 359 00:18:43,356 --> 00:18:45,923 TÚ Y YO BAILA... 360 00:18:45,991 --> 00:18:47,225 ESTE SÁBADO. 361 00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:49,460 YOU WANT TO HAVE DANCE CLASS ON SATURDAY. 362 00:18:49,529 --> 00:18:51,161 SÍ. SÍ. 363 00:18:51,231 --> 00:18:54,799 OKAY, YEAH, I WOULD REALLY... I WOULD LIKE THAT. 364 00:18:54,867 --> 00:18:56,934 UM, UH, NOON? 365 00:18:57,002 --> 00:18:59,236 - OKAY, NOON. - NOON. 366 00:18:59,304 --> 00:19:00,338 OKAY. SÍ. 367 00:19:00,406 --> 00:19:02,540 WELL, UH, ADIOS, 368 00:19:02,608 --> 00:19:03,641 MI AMIGOS. 369 00:19:03,710 --> 00:19:04,842 BYE-BYE. 370 00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:08,078 WE'RE NOT SPEAKING THE SAME LANGUAGE. 371 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:11,315 WE TRIED MATH AND SCIENCE. YOU HAVE NO AREA OF EXPERTISE. 372 00:19:11,384 --> 00:19:14,317 YOU'RE PROBABLY NOT GONNA GET THAT LAST BIG HEAD SLOT. 373 00:19:14,386 --> 00:19:16,253 YOU'RE NOT GIVING UP ON ME, ARE YOU? 374 00:19:16,321 --> 00:19:19,122 GOD, YOU OF ALL PEOPLE I THOUGHT WOULD UNDERSTAND. 375 00:19:19,191 --> 00:19:20,390 WHY ME? 376 00:19:20,460 --> 00:19:22,392 BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE 377 00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:25,929 TO HAVE THE GIRL YOU LOVE MOST IN THE WORLD BLOW YOU OFF. 378 00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:28,065 JOSH FORD, ACCOUNT 202? 379 00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:29,967 - YEAH, THANKS, MAN. - WHAT IS THIS? 380 00:19:30,036 --> 00:19:32,936 I ORDERED TWO MR. CLUCK'S SPECIAL DINNERS WITH SUPER-SIZE SLAW. 381 00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,972 YOU ORDERED CHICKEN AT A TIME LIKE THIS? 382 00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:38,576 YEAH, ESPECIALLY IF I'VE GOT TO KEEP UP MY STRENGTH FOR THE FACE-OFF, 383 00:19:38,644 --> 00:19:40,778 NOW THAT I'M GONNA BE STUDYING "HAN SOLO." 384 00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:44,248 AREN'T THESE LEGS A LITTLE SCRAWNY? 385 00:19:44,317 --> 00:19:48,285 THEY COULDN'T BE SMALL ENOUGH FOR ME. I'M AFRAID OF CHICKENS. 386 00:19:49,855 --> 00:19:51,855 FUNNY JOB FOR AN ALEKTOROPHOBIC. 387 00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:53,323 WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? 388 00:19:53,393 --> 00:19:55,293 ALEKTOROPHOBIA. THE FEAR OF CHICKENS. 389 00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:58,128 COULD BE JUST SOME SORT OF A PRIMITIVE REACTION. 390 00:19:58,198 --> 00:20:01,532 DID YOU KNOW CHICKENS ARE THE CLOSEST LIVING RELATIVE TO THE TYRANNOSAURUS REX? 391 00:20:01,601 --> 00:20:05,469 THEY BOOGIE FAST, TOO. I'M TALKING NINE MILES AN HOUR ON THE GROUND. 392 00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:09,940 WOW, THAT'S REALLY AMAZING FACTS ABOUT... CHICKENS. 393 00:20:10,009 --> 00:20:13,777 DID YOU KNOW THEY TALK TO EACH OTHER? WITH CLUCKING SOUNDS. 394 00:20:13,846 --> 00:20:16,179 AND DON'T THINK THEY CAN'T FLY. THEY CAN. 395 00:20:16,249 --> 00:20:19,650 YEP, CHICKENS ARE WICKED FIERCE CREATURES, MAN. 396 00:20:19,719 --> 00:20:21,419 HEY, YOU FORGOT A SLAW! 397 00:20:21,487 --> 00:20:24,355 YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE? A SAVANT OF THE HENHOUSE. 398 00:20:24,424 --> 00:20:27,424 NO, I JUST KNOW A LOT ABOUT CHICKENS. SO LOOK. 399 00:20:27,493 --> 00:20:29,693 THANKS FOR GIVING ME A SHOT. 400 00:20:29,762 --> 00:20:33,396 YOU GONNA SPLIT THAT SLAW WITH ME OR EAT IT ALL YOURSELF? 401 00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:35,966 NICE. 402 00:20:36,035 --> 00:20:37,801 IF I COULD DO IT OVER, 403 00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:40,103 I WOULD HAVE TAKEN YOU TO THE HOSPITAL WHEN YOUR APPENDIX BURST, 404 00:20:40,172 --> 00:20:44,675 AND I WOULDN'T HAVE TRIED TO RUN YOU OVER WHEN YOU STAINED MY CHINCHILLA COAT. 405 00:20:44,744 --> 00:20:47,177 GO AHEAD, MAMA. MAKE ME BELIEVE IT! 406 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:51,148 AND I ADMIT I ALWAYS FORGET YOUR BIRTHDAY, 407 00:20:51,216 --> 00:20:56,053 AND I HAVE YET TO EXHIBIT EVEN THE SLIGHTEST INTEREST IN YOUR PERSONAL LIFE... 408 00:20:56,121 --> 00:20:57,220 [YAWNING] 409 00:20:57,289 --> 00:20:58,756 HAVE I MISSED ANYTHING? 410 00:20:58,824 --> 00:21:02,326 - JUST A LITTLE EMOTIONAL BRIBERY. - AMATEURS. 411 00:21:02,395 --> 00:21:05,596 AND I, I... I CARE WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU! 412 00:21:05,665 --> 00:21:07,598 ESPECIALLY WHEN WE'RE OUT IN PUBLIC 413 00:21:07,667 --> 00:21:11,969 AND STRANGERS ASK ME IF YOU'RE A MONGOLOID, AND I SEE YOU POUT. 414 00:21:12,037 --> 00:21:13,436 - MAMA! - OH! 415 00:21:13,505 --> 00:21:15,906 I'M SO TOUCHED. 416 00:21:17,409 --> 00:21:18,776 OKAY. 417 00:21:18,844 --> 00:21:21,378 COME ON. LIKE A HUG. LIKE A REAL HUG. 418 00:21:23,482 --> 00:21:25,048 I'M ON THE TEAM NOW? 419 00:21:25,117 --> 00:21:27,685 NO, YOU STILL HAVE TO FACE OFF WITH JOSHUA, 420 00:21:27,753 --> 00:21:29,687 BUT I WISH YOU LUCK, MAMA. 421 00:21:29,755 --> 00:21:30,888 [LAUGHS] 422 00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:32,022 OW, OKAY, MAMA! 423 00:21:32,091 --> 00:21:34,124 THAT'S ENOUGH. 424 00:21:34,193 --> 00:21:36,360 I CAN'T BREATHE. I CAN'T BREATHE. 425 00:21:36,429 --> 00:21:37,661 HELP. 426 00:21:45,237 --> 00:21:47,204 [LILY CLEARS THROAT] 427 00:21:47,272 --> 00:21:49,106 SORRY. I WAS JUST PRACTICING. 428 00:21:49,174 --> 00:21:50,641 SO I SEE. 429 00:21:50,710 --> 00:21:54,011 I GOT A LITTLE INSPIRED AT MY DANCE CLASS, 'CAUSE... 430 00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:56,780 I MET A GUY, AND HE IS SO CUTE. 431 00:21:56,849 --> 00:21:59,983 OKAY, SO HE'S FROM GUADALAJARA, AND HE DOESN'T SPEAK ENGLISH, 432 00:22:00,052 --> 00:22:02,653 BUT HE IS SO SWEET AND A GOOD DANCER, 433 00:22:02,722 --> 00:22:05,188 AND WE JUST HAVE THIS... CHEMISTRY. 434 00:22:05,257 --> 00:22:07,024 WHAT'S WRONG? 435 00:22:07,092 --> 00:22:10,861 CARM, I JUST... I THINK THAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR 436 00:22:10,930 --> 00:22:16,400 SOME KIND OF SELF-ACCEPTANCE OR APPROVAL AT THE EXPENSE OF YOUR FUTURE. 437 00:22:16,469 --> 00:22:20,070 AND NOW YOU'RE FALLING FOR SOME GUY YOU JUST MET 438 00:22:20,139 --> 00:22:22,406 AND WHO YOU CAN'T EVEN TALK TO? 439 00:22:22,475 --> 00:22:26,610 YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW IF YOU HAVE AN INTELLECTUAL BASIS FOR A RELATIONSHIP. 440 00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:28,245 WAIT A MINUTE. 441 00:22:28,314 --> 00:22:31,949 YOU'RE GONNA TALK TO ME ABOUT AN INTELLECTUAL BASIS FOR A RELATIONSHIP 442 00:22:32,017 --> 00:22:33,183 WHEN YOU'RE DATING JOSH? 443 00:22:33,252 --> 00:22:36,186 - WAIT A MINUTE. JOSH... - NO, YOU WAIT A MINUTE. 444 00:22:36,255 --> 00:22:40,290 PABLO DOESN'T SPEAK ENGLISH 'CAUSE HE DOESN'T KNOW IT, NOT 'CAUSE HE CAN'T LEARN IT. 445 00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:42,660 AND IF YOU WANT TO ANALYZE SOMEONE 446 00:22:42,728 --> 00:22:47,631 WHO'S LOOKING FOR APPROVAL BY BEING IN A BOGUS RELATIONSHIP WHERE SHE CAN'T COMMUNICATE, 447 00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:50,734 WELL, THERE ARE THREE MIRRORS HERE IN FRONT OF YOU. 448 00:22:52,004 --> 00:22:53,536 PICK ONE. 449 00:22:59,679 --> 00:23:03,313 MARY CHERRY WILL CHOOSE A CATEGORY AND THEN ASK A RELATED QUESTION. 450 00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:06,817 THE FIRST PERSON TO GET THE RIGHT ANSWER IS ON THE TEAM, 451 00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:10,153 AND THE OTHER IS OFFICIALLY THE STUPIDEST PERSON ON EARTH. 452 00:23:10,222 --> 00:23:11,989 READY? 453 00:23:12,058 --> 00:23:14,625 DO YOU KNOW THE WORST PART ABOUT THIS FACE-OFF? 454 00:23:14,694 --> 00:23:16,694 ONE OF THEM HAS TO WIN. 455 00:23:16,762 --> 00:23:18,195 [MARY CHERRY] OKAY. 456 00:23:18,263 --> 00:23:21,031 AND THE CATEGORY IS... 457 00:23:21,100 --> 00:23:23,300 OH, DEAR GOD, PLEASE, LET IT BE CHICKEN. 458 00:23:23,368 --> 00:23:26,403 PHILOSOPHICAL DILEMMAS. 459 00:23:27,507 --> 00:23:29,607 QUESTION IS, 460 00:23:29,675 --> 00:23:34,978 WHICH CAME FIRST, THE CHICKEN OR THE EGG? 461 00:23:35,047 --> 00:23:36,413 BRAN FLAKES! 462 00:23:36,481 --> 00:23:37,448 NO. 463 00:23:37,517 --> 00:23:39,049 I AM SORRY, MAMA. 464 00:23:39,118 --> 00:23:40,918 THAT IS "INCORRECTIONAL." 465 00:23:41,754 --> 00:23:42,986 JOSHUA? 466 00:23:43,055 --> 00:23:44,588 THE ANSWER IS THE CHICKEN. 467 00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:47,190 CHICKENS EVOLVED BY THE INTER-BREEDING OF OTHER ANIMALS. 468 00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:50,493 THE FIRST CHICKEN WAS HATCHED BY EGGS LAID BY ANOTHER SPECIES. 469 00:23:50,562 --> 00:23:52,997 - FINAL ANSWER? - FINAL ANSWER. 470 00:23:58,037 --> 00:24:00,570 WELL, JOSHUA, I AM STUNNED. 471 00:24:00,639 --> 00:24:02,172 YOU'RE CORRECT. 472 00:24:02,241 --> 00:24:04,141 - YOU'RE A BIG HEAD! - OH! 473 00:24:05,377 --> 00:24:06,644 OKAY, EVERYBODY, LISTEN UP. 474 00:24:06,712 --> 00:24:08,579 YOU MAY HAVE BEAT ME, 475 00:24:08,648 --> 00:24:10,881 AND MAYBE BRAN FLAKES AREN'T THE ANSWER TO EVERYTHING. 476 00:24:10,950 --> 00:24:14,284 BUT YOU'LL BE SORRY YOU EVER CROSSED CHERRY CHERRY. 477 00:24:14,353 --> 00:24:18,889 AND AS FOR YOU. JUST WAIT TILL YOU GET HOME, MISSY. 478 00:24:29,501 --> 00:24:31,201 BROOKE, HURRY UP. 479 00:24:31,270 --> 00:24:35,172 I GOT YOUR MESSAGE. I'M PSYCHED YOU GUYS FINALLY WANT TO STUDY AGAIN. 480 00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:38,642 WELL, ACTUALLY, WE HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU. 481 00:24:38,711 --> 00:24:41,945 WE WANT YOU TO COME WATCH US PLAY BIG HEAD ON TV. 482 00:24:42,014 --> 00:24:45,515 NO, LOOK, I SET ASIDE SATURDAY TO REALLY HIT THE BOOKS. 483 00:24:45,585 --> 00:24:47,685 WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME? 484 00:24:47,753 --> 00:24:50,653 COME ON. A GROUP OF US AGREED TO STUDY, 485 00:24:50,722 --> 00:24:53,023 AND YOU HAVE ALL FLAKED ON ME, 486 00:24:53,092 --> 00:24:55,225 EVEN JOSH, WHO'S JUST DISAPPEARED COMPLETELY. 487 00:24:55,294 --> 00:24:58,228 HE HASN'T DISAPPEARED. HE'S BEEN STUDYING WITH US. 488 00:24:58,297 --> 00:25:01,632 - HE MADE THE BIG HEAD TEAM. - HE WANTED TO SURPRISE YOU. 489 00:25:01,701 --> 00:25:06,504 I'M SUPPOSED TO GET YOU THERE WITHOUT YOU FINDING OUT. SO PRETEND YOU DIDN'T KNOW. 490 00:25:06,572 --> 00:25:08,972 NO. NO, I'M NOT GOING. 491 00:25:09,041 --> 00:25:11,241 BUT YOU HAVE TO, LILY. 492 00:25:11,310 --> 00:25:13,410 - JOSH IS... - LOOK, I KNOW JOSH, 493 00:25:13,478 --> 00:25:17,080 WHAT HE'S GOOD AT AND WHAT HE'S NOT, AND HE'S GONNA GET CREAMED. 494 00:25:17,149 --> 00:25:19,082 I DON'T HAVE THE HEART TO WATCH IT. 495 00:25:19,151 --> 00:25:20,750 JOSH IS DOING THIS FOR YOU. 496 00:25:20,820 --> 00:25:24,487 THEN HE'S DOING IT FOR THE WRONG REASONS. 497 00:25:24,556 --> 00:25:27,691 MY MOM DROPPED ME OFF, AND I'M NOT WALKING HOME, 498 00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:31,294 SO I'M GONNA STAY HERE AND STUDY, IF THAT'S OKAY WITH YOU. 499 00:25:32,564 --> 00:25:34,497 I THINK YOU'RE MAKING A MISTAKE, 500 00:25:34,566 --> 00:25:37,334 BUT, OKAY, IT'S YOUR CALL. 501 00:25:42,842 --> 00:25:45,608 I KNOW JOSH, TOO, AND I CAN TELL YOU, 502 00:25:45,677 --> 00:25:48,979 DON'T BOTHER STUDYING FOR HOW TO HURT HIS FEELINGS. 503 00:25:49,048 --> 00:25:50,914 I THINK YOU HAVE THAT DOWN. 504 00:25:58,590 --> 00:26:00,891 [SALSA MUSIC] 505 00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:29,753 YOU'RE GONNA BE FINE. 506 00:26:29,822 --> 00:26:33,123 HI, HOOTS. OKAY. COME ON, EVERYBODY. GATHER 'ROUND. 507 00:26:33,192 --> 00:26:35,926 COME ON. I HAVE A VERY SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT. 508 00:26:35,995 --> 00:26:39,162 LADIES AND GENTLEMENS, 509 00:26:39,231 --> 00:26:41,365 EVEN MY WINNING PERSONALITY, 510 00:26:41,433 --> 00:26:44,602 COUPLED WITH STAGGERING AMOUNTS OF CASH 511 00:26:44,670 --> 00:26:46,604 WASN'T ENOUGH TO INFLUENCE THE JUDGES 512 00:26:46,672 --> 00:26:48,272 INTO GIVING ME THE ANSWERS. 513 00:26:48,340 --> 00:26:50,674 I DID, HOWEVER, GET TO CHOOSE OUR OPPONENTS. 514 00:26:50,743 --> 00:26:52,009 AND THEY WOULD BE? 515 00:26:52,077 --> 00:26:54,511 THE BUSH PRIVATE SCHOOL FOR SPECIAL NEEDS CHILDREN. 516 00:26:54,579 --> 00:26:57,547 YEAH. AND FOR SOME STRANGE REASON, THEY WANNA PLAY. 517 00:26:57,617 --> 00:26:59,216 CAN YOU IMAGINE? 518 00:26:59,284 --> 00:27:03,020 [WOMAN ON P.A.] PLACES, PLEASE. STUDENTS FROM KENNEDY HIGH. 519 00:27:04,123 --> 00:27:06,957 HEY, SAM, SO, WHERE'S LILY? 520 00:27:07,026 --> 00:27:10,694 JOSH, LILY WAS SO EXCITED FOR YOU THAT SHE 521 00:27:10,763 --> 00:27:13,796 WAS WORRIED SHE'D MAKE YOU NERVOUS IF SHE SHOWED UP. 522 00:27:13,865 --> 00:27:15,765 SO SHE'S WATCHING AT HOME. 523 00:27:16,869 --> 00:27:18,101 OKAY, THANKS. 524 00:27:20,706 --> 00:27:21,972 HERE WE GO! 525 00:27:22,041 --> 00:27:24,608 - HEY, WHAT'S WRONG? - LILY DIDN'T COME. 526 00:27:24,677 --> 00:27:29,112 SHE PROBABLY THINKS I'M GONNA MAKE A FOOL OF MYSELF AND DOESN'T WANT TO WATCH. 527 00:27:29,181 --> 00:27:31,849 I AM POSITIVE THAT THAT'S NOT TRUE. 528 00:27:32,952 --> 00:27:34,885 YEAH, SURE YOU ARE. 529 00:27:39,224 --> 00:27:41,591 [ANNOUNCER] AND NOW, LET'S BRING IN THE STUDENTS 530 00:27:41,660 --> 00:27:44,427 FROM THE BUSH PRIVATE SCHOOL FOR SPECIAL NEEDS CHILDREN. 531 00:27:47,399 --> 00:27:49,166 THEY DON'T LOOK RETARDED. 532 00:27:50,770 --> 00:27:52,602 OH, YEAH, HI. THAT'S YOUR MOM. 533 00:27:52,671 --> 00:27:56,839 YEAH, I KNOW, AND SHE'S BROUGHT MY ARCHENEMY JUDGES FROM TEEN TARTZ. 534 00:27:56,909 --> 00:27:58,541 SHE BOUGHT THE TEAM. 535 00:27:58,610 --> 00:28:01,211 - OH! - AND NOW, THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE, 536 00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:04,414 THE SHOW THAT TESTS YOUR MOST VALUABLE ASSET, YOUR BIG HEAD! 537 00:28:04,483 --> 00:28:07,417 PLEASE WELCOME OUR HOST, MR. ED McMAHON! 538 00:28:19,498 --> 00:28:21,865 [SIGHS] 539 00:28:37,549 --> 00:28:40,718 LET'S PLAY THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE! 540 00:28:46,625 --> 00:28:49,893 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'D DO SOMETHING SO TERRIBLE TO ME. 541 00:28:49,962 --> 00:28:53,096 THEN YOU'RE STUPIDER THAN I THOUGHT! LET'S PLAY! 542 00:28:53,165 --> 00:28:56,066 OH! A LITTLE SCHOOL RIVALRY GOING ON. 543 00:28:56,135 --> 00:28:58,368 THAT'S GOOD. NOW, I ASK A QUESTION. 544 00:28:58,437 --> 00:29:03,107 WHOEVER BUZZES IN FIRST WITH THE RIGHT ANSWER CHOOSES THE CATEGORY FOR ROUND ONE. 545 00:29:03,175 --> 00:29:04,607 YOU READY? ALL RIGHT. 546 00:29:04,676 --> 00:29:07,277 "NAME A BREAKFAST FOOD THAT ALSO SERVES AS..." 547 00:29:07,346 --> 00:29:10,647 - [BUZZES] - THE ANSWER IS BRAN FLAKES. 548 00:29:10,715 --> 00:29:14,317 CORRECT. NOW, CHERRY CHERRY, YOU GET TO CHOOSE EITHER OF THESE CATEGORIES. 549 00:29:14,386 --> 00:29:16,653 THE COMPLETE SONNETS OF WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE, 550 00:29:16,722 --> 00:29:18,488 OR ABUSIVE MOTHERS. 551 00:29:18,557 --> 00:29:20,757 ED, I'M GONNA TAKE ABUSIVE MOTHERS. 552 00:29:20,825 --> 00:29:22,926 THIS GAME IS RIGGED! 553 00:29:22,995 --> 00:29:24,962 OKAY, ABUSIVE MOTHERS. 554 00:29:25,030 --> 00:29:28,331 FOR 100 POINTS, SHE WAS A FILM STAR WHO... 555 00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:30,233 - JOAN CRAWFORD! - CORRECT! 556 00:29:30,302 --> 00:29:31,668 NOW, FOR 200 POINTS, 557 00:29:31,736 --> 00:29:34,671 THIS MOTHER CRUELLY SOLD HER DAUGHTER'S CHILDHOOD TOYS 558 00:29:34,739 --> 00:29:36,839 - ON THE INTERNET... - JADE BARRYMORE. 559 00:29:36,908 --> 00:29:38,175 CORRECT! 560 00:29:38,244 --> 00:29:40,110 YOU'RE SLEEPING WITH HIM, AREN'T YOU? 561 00:29:40,179 --> 00:29:42,912 FOR 500 POINTS, IN GREEK MYTHOLOGY, 562 00:29:42,982 --> 00:29:43,981 SHE WAS... 563 00:29:45,517 --> 00:29:47,350 - OW! - MEDEA. 564 00:29:47,419 --> 00:29:48,518 THAT'S CORRECT. 565 00:29:48,587 --> 00:29:51,554 LAST QUESTION. IT'S FOR 1,000 POINTS. 566 00:29:51,623 --> 00:29:54,157 "IN SOUTH CAROLINA, SHE..." 567 00:29:54,226 --> 00:29:57,227 WHO IS CHERRY CHERRY! 568 00:29:57,296 --> 00:29:58,328 [BUZZ] 569 00:29:58,397 --> 00:30:00,330 I'M SORRY. THAT'S THE WRONG ANSWER. 570 00:30:00,399 --> 00:30:02,332 WHO IS SUSAN SMITH? 571 00:30:02,401 --> 00:30:04,034 YOU RAN THE CATEGORY. 572 00:30:04,103 --> 00:30:06,636 BUSH LEADS KENNEDY 1,800 TO NOTHING. 573 00:30:06,705 --> 00:30:09,739 - ROUND TWO. - ED... 574 00:30:26,992 --> 00:30:28,392 HERE'S THE TOSS-UP QUESTION: 575 00:30:28,460 --> 00:30:32,662 PAGE 54 OF THE NEW RESTORATION HARDWARE CATALOG IS... 576 00:30:32,731 --> 00:30:34,697 - BATHROOM FIXTURES, ED. - CORRECT! 577 00:30:37,536 --> 00:30:40,270 [SPEAKING SPANISH, INDISTINCT] 578 00:30:42,975 --> 00:30:44,641 DE NADA. 579 00:30:45,810 --> 00:30:48,311 CARMEN, OKAY. ¿LISTA? 580 00:30:48,380 --> 00:30:51,414 UM, I'VE BEEN PRACTICING, SO I THINK I'M PROBABLY BETTER. 581 00:30:51,483 --> 00:30:53,150 OH, OKAY. QUE BUENO. 582 00:31:17,709 --> 00:31:21,611 I'M... I'M SORRY. I CAN'T DO THIS. 583 00:31:25,684 --> 00:31:28,084 I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU. 584 00:31:28,153 --> 00:31:29,686 I... 585 00:31:33,325 --> 00:31:35,458 COULD YOU JUST TELL HIM THANK YOU 586 00:31:35,527 --> 00:31:38,028 AND THAT I LEARNED A LOT? 587 00:31:38,097 --> 00:31:40,197 A WHOLE LOT. 588 00:31:40,266 --> 00:31:44,067 AND I'M NOT GONNA COME BACK, SO YOU CAN KEEP MY MONEY. 589 00:32:04,556 --> 00:32:08,492 AS WE BREAK FOR HALFTIME, BUSH LEADS KENNEDY 3,600 TO 0. 590 00:32:08,560 --> 00:32:09,992 [MARY CHERRY] WE'RE DOOMED. 591 00:32:10,062 --> 00:32:12,462 WHY DID I ASK JAMIE TO WATCH? WHY? 592 00:32:12,531 --> 00:32:15,332 ORDINARILY, I'D ENCOURAGE ALL OF YOU TO TRY HARDER, 593 00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:19,669 BUT UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES, I SUGGEST THAT EACH OF YOU ASK YOURSELF THIS QUESTION: 594 00:32:19,738 --> 00:32:22,839 - AM I WINNING OR AM I PRETTY? - THAT'S NOT RIGHT. 595 00:32:22,907 --> 00:32:24,141 IT'S DEFEATIST, TOO. 596 00:32:24,209 --> 00:32:25,943 YOU GUYS HAVE THREE ROUNDS LEFT. 597 00:32:26,011 --> 00:32:27,844 I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE ALL THINKING. 598 00:32:27,912 --> 00:32:30,647 "SO WHAT IF SAM AND BROOKE PULL US EVEN. 599 00:32:30,715 --> 00:32:32,716 WE GOT JOSH IN THE CLEANUP SLOT." 600 00:32:32,784 --> 00:32:36,053 IF THIS WERE SURVIVOR, I'D BE HALFWAY BACK TO THE HOTEL. 601 00:32:36,121 --> 00:32:38,055 HAVE A LITTLE FAITH IN YOURSELF. 602 00:32:38,123 --> 00:32:39,456 NO, TAKE MY PLACE. 603 00:32:39,525 --> 00:32:41,358 - WHAT ABOUT LILY? - LILY'S NOT HERE! 604 00:32:41,426 --> 00:32:45,495 AND SHE'S RIGHT. NOT ONLY AM I GONNA MAKE A FOOL OF MYSELF, 605 00:32:45,564 --> 00:32:47,897 I'M GONNA RUIN THIS TEAM'S CHANCES TO WIN. 606 00:32:47,966 --> 00:32:50,300 NO, WE BELIEVE IN YOU. GUYS, TELL HIM. 607 00:32:50,369 --> 00:32:53,036 YOU WANT TO KEEP JOSH ON THIS TEAM, RIGHT? 608 00:32:53,105 --> 00:32:54,571 UM... 609 00:32:55,907 --> 00:32:57,774 THE TRIBE HAS SPOKEN. 610 00:32:57,843 --> 00:32:59,476 IT'S UP TO YOU. 611 00:33:07,052 --> 00:33:09,752 DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT DUMPING ON YOUR FRIEND 612 00:33:09,821 --> 00:33:12,556 TO WIN SOME GAME IS GONNA MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER? 613 00:33:12,624 --> 00:33:15,292 'CAUSE JOSH WORKED REALLY HARD TO GET HERE. 614 00:33:15,360 --> 00:33:18,595 HE GAVE IT EVERYTHING HE HAD, AND IF THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH, 615 00:33:18,663 --> 00:33:20,830 I DON'T WANT TO PLAY WITH YOU, EITHER. 616 00:33:20,899 --> 00:33:24,167 - BUT, JOE, I WANT TO WIN. - YEAH, ME, TOO. 617 00:33:24,236 --> 00:33:26,103 YEAH, WRONG CHOICE OF PRONOUN. 618 00:33:26,171 --> 00:33:29,138 THIS IS A TEAM. THE WORD YOU'RE LOOKING FOR IS "WE." 619 00:33:29,208 --> 00:33:31,341 AS FOR WINNING, I DON'T THINK JOSH 620 00:33:31,410 --> 00:33:34,444 COULD DO ANY WORSE THAN THE TWO OF YOU. 621 00:33:34,513 --> 00:33:36,079 STUDENTS, TAKE YOUR PLACES 622 00:33:36,148 --> 00:33:38,948 FOR THE LAST HALF OF THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE. 623 00:33:39,018 --> 00:33:44,354 HARRISON'S RIGHT. WE CAME AS A TEAM, AND WE'RE GONNA LEAVE AS ONE. 624 00:33:44,423 --> 00:33:47,524 IT REALLY DOESN'T MATTER. LILY ISN'T SEEING IT ANYWAY, SO... 625 00:33:47,593 --> 00:33:51,595 THEN DON'T DO IT FOR LILY. DO IT FOR YOURSELF. 626 00:33:54,933 --> 00:33:57,867 ALL RIGHT, SCHOLARS, READY FOR ROUND THREE? 627 00:33:57,936 --> 00:34:00,570 LET'S PLAY THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE! 628 00:34:02,441 --> 00:34:04,107 ALL RIGHT, HERE'S THE TOSS-UP QUESTION. 629 00:34:04,176 --> 00:34:06,143 "I'M AN EXTREMELY WEALTHY WOMAN 630 00:34:06,211 --> 00:34:07,810 "WITH A HORRIFYING WARDROBE 631 00:34:07,879 --> 00:34:10,280 SCARY TEETH AND TOO MANY DOGS." 632 00:34:10,349 --> 00:34:11,614 WHO AM I? 633 00:34:11,683 --> 00:34:12,782 THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND? 634 00:34:12,851 --> 00:34:14,951 INDEED, I AM THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND. 635 00:34:15,019 --> 00:34:17,554 YOU GET TO CHOOSE THE NEXT CATEGORY. 636 00:34:17,622 --> 00:34:19,722 WILL IT BE LEGAL LATIN OR BROOKE McQUEEN? 637 00:34:19,791 --> 00:34:21,858 I'LL TRY BROOKE McQUEEN FOR 100. 638 00:34:21,926 --> 00:34:23,427 HEY, THAT'S AGAINST THE RULES. 639 00:34:23,495 --> 00:34:26,329 WELL, AS SOCRATES SAID, THE KEY TO INTELLIGENCE 640 00:34:26,398 --> 00:34:27,730 IS TO KNOW THYSELF. 641 00:34:27,799 --> 00:34:30,433 FIRST QUESTION, 100 POINTS. 642 00:34:30,502 --> 00:34:33,270 "BROOKE LOST HER VIRGINITY TO..." 643 00:34:33,338 --> 00:34:34,537 WHO IS JOSH FORD? 644 00:34:34,606 --> 00:34:36,373 - CORRECT! - HA! YES! 645 00:34:38,477 --> 00:34:39,842 - GLAMAZON. - CORRECT! 646 00:34:39,911 --> 00:34:41,411 YES! 647 00:34:42,514 --> 00:34:44,381 - EATING DISORDER. - CORRECT! 648 00:34:44,449 --> 00:34:45,448 [BUZZING] 649 00:34:45,517 --> 00:34:47,417 - CORRECT! - AH! 650 00:34:50,088 --> 00:34:51,288 YES! 651 00:34:51,356 --> 00:34:53,523 I'LL TAKE STARS OF THE WB, ED. 652 00:34:54,859 --> 00:34:56,626 WEDNESDAYS AT 9:00. 653 00:34:56,695 --> 00:34:58,395 YOU ARE CORRECT, SAM! 654 00:34:58,463 --> 00:35:00,262 ADULT MALE FILM STAR? 655 00:35:00,332 --> 00:35:01,764 CORRECT! 656 00:35:04,536 --> 00:35:06,269 CORRECT, CORRECT, CORRECT! 657 00:35:06,338 --> 00:35:08,471 CONGRATULATIONS, SAM McPHERSON. 658 00:35:08,540 --> 00:35:11,108 YOU RAN THE CATEGORY, AND LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, 659 00:35:11,176 --> 00:35:12,909 WE HAVE A TIE. 660 00:35:18,350 --> 00:35:19,749 [HARRISON] DOESN'T DR. SKIPPY MEYER 661 00:35:19,818 --> 00:35:23,253 LOOK LIKE STEPHEN HAWKING, THE WORLD'S SMARTEST MAN, 662 00:35:23,322 --> 00:35:26,489 WHO CHERRY CHERRY COULD HAVE PAID TO BE ON HER TEAM? 663 00:35:26,558 --> 00:35:28,157 CAN'T BE. 664 00:35:28,226 --> 00:35:32,328 SAYS HERE HE'S A SOPHOMORE AND PRESIDENT OF THE TRACK CLUB. 665 00:35:33,632 --> 00:35:36,466 SOMETHING'S NOT RIGHT HERE. 666 00:35:36,535 --> 00:35:38,234 [ED] ALL RIGHT. 667 00:35:38,302 --> 00:35:42,105 IN THIS SPECIAL INSTANCE, IF DR. MEYER KNOWS THE ANSWER, 668 00:35:42,174 --> 00:35:44,908 HE'LL TYPE IN A BUZZ, AND WE'LL ACCEPT IT. 669 00:35:44,976 --> 00:35:47,176 NOW, GENTLEMEN, YOUR TOSS-UP QUESTION. 670 00:35:47,245 --> 00:35:50,247 "THE ORIGINAL MEANING OF THE WORD 'SINISTER'..." 671 00:35:50,315 --> 00:35:52,148 OW! MY LEFT HAND... 672 00:35:52,216 --> 00:35:55,318 CORRECT. "SINISTER" IS FROM THE LATIN, APPLIED TO PEOPLE 673 00:35:55,387 --> 00:35:57,420 WHO WERE LEFT-HANDED. 674 00:35:57,489 --> 00:35:58,688 NOW, HERE WE GO. 675 00:35:58,757 --> 00:36:02,125 THE CATEGORIES ARE PHYSICS OF STRING THEORY 676 00:36:02,194 --> 00:36:03,660 OR POULTRY. 677 00:36:08,733 --> 00:36:10,800 [COMPUTER VOICE] STRING THEORY COULD BE FUN. 678 00:36:10,869 --> 00:36:14,236 WE'RE ALL TIED UP. WHICH WAY DO WE GO, JOSH? 679 00:36:15,574 --> 00:36:17,741 SON, WE HAVE TO HAVE YOUR ANSWER. 680 00:36:17,809 --> 00:36:19,709 - I GUESS I'LL CHOOSE... - NO. 681 00:36:19,778 --> 00:36:23,613 NO! JOSH! JOSH, WAIT! 682 00:36:27,018 --> 00:36:30,820 POULTRY IS CHICKEN! 683 00:36:30,889 --> 00:36:34,557 IT'S CHICKEN! 684 00:36:34,626 --> 00:36:36,092 [ROOSTER CROWING] 685 00:36:36,160 --> 00:36:37,860 ED, I'LL TAKE POULTRY FOR 100. 686 00:36:37,929 --> 00:36:40,830 ALL RIGHT. "THE LATIN NAME FOR CHICKEN IS..." 687 00:36:40,899 --> 00:36:43,399 - GALLUS DOMESTICUS. - CORRECT! 688 00:36:43,468 --> 00:36:45,267 KENNEDY MOVES INTO THE LEAD! 689 00:36:46,905 --> 00:36:48,471 BUZZ. 690 00:36:48,540 --> 00:36:51,040 I'M SORRY, SKIPPY, YOU'RE JUST A LITTLE LATE. 691 00:36:51,109 --> 00:36:52,642 ALL RIGHT, NEXT QUESTION. 692 00:36:52,711 --> 00:36:55,578 "IN 1994, THE NUMBER OF EGGS PRODUCED 693 00:36:55,647 --> 00:36:58,047 IN THE UNITED STATES WAS..." 694 00:36:58,116 --> 00:37:02,752 IT WAS APPROXIMATELY 73,866,147. 695 00:37:02,821 --> 00:37:04,186 - CORRECT! - BUZZ. 696 00:37:04,255 --> 00:37:08,591 SKIPPY, YOU'LL HAVE TO TYPE JUST A TINY BIT FASTER. 697 00:37:10,094 --> 00:37:12,228 ALL RIGHT, FOR 500 POINTS. 698 00:37:12,296 --> 00:37:14,797 "IF A ROOSTER IS NOT PRESENT IN A FLOCK OF..." 699 00:37:14,866 --> 00:37:17,334 HIS ROLE WILL BE TAKEN OVER BY A HEN, 700 00:37:17,402 --> 00:37:20,002 WHO WILL STOP LAYING EGGS AND START CROWING. 701 00:37:20,071 --> 00:37:21,871 THAT IS CORRECT. 702 00:37:21,940 --> 00:37:24,507 ALL RIGHT, IT ALL COMES DOWN TO THIS QUESTION: 703 00:37:24,576 --> 00:37:25,842 FOR ONE BILLION POINTS, 704 00:37:25,911 --> 00:37:28,711 THE GAME, AND PERHAPS THE SOLUTION 705 00:37:28,780 --> 00:37:32,214 TO CALIFORNIA'S ONGOING ENERGY CRISIS, ANSWER THIS: 706 00:37:32,283 --> 00:37:34,984 "THE FECAL MATTER PRODUCED BY ONE CHICKEN 707 00:37:35,053 --> 00:37:38,287 IN ITS LIFETIME CAN SUPPLY WHAT?" 708 00:37:50,869 --> 00:37:52,769 - ED? - YEAH? 709 00:37:52,837 --> 00:37:56,038 A SINGLE CHICKEN'S FECAL MATTER... 710 00:37:56,107 --> 00:37:59,041 CAN SUPPLY ENOUGH ELECTRICITY TO RUN A 100-WATT BULB 711 00:37:59,110 --> 00:38:01,243 FOR UP TO FIVE HOURS. 712 00:38:02,514 --> 00:38:03,546 CORRECT! 713 00:38:03,615 --> 00:38:05,147 KENNEDY HIGH, YOU'RE THE WINNERS 714 00:38:05,216 --> 00:38:07,083 OF THE BIG HEAD CHALLENGE! 715 00:38:18,563 --> 00:38:19,862 THANKS, ED. 716 00:38:28,172 --> 00:38:29,572 OH, YEAH. 717 00:38:29,641 --> 00:38:30,740 FANTASTIC. 718 00:38:30,809 --> 00:38:32,709 - YOU WERE GOOD. - NO, YOU WERE. 719 00:38:33,979 --> 00:38:36,579 I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW, YOU VICIOUS VIXEN, 720 00:38:36,648 --> 00:38:38,981 THAT YOU STOOD OPPOSITE YOUR MOTHER TODAY 721 00:38:39,050 --> 00:38:41,684 AND RUTHLESSLY DID EVERYTHING YOU COULD TO HUMILIATE ME 722 00:38:41,753 --> 00:38:44,621 IN FRONT OF BOTH THE PEOPLE WHO ARE WATCHING THIS SHOW. 723 00:38:44,689 --> 00:38:47,456 WELL, I LEARNED IT ALL FROM YOU, MAMA! 724 00:38:47,526 --> 00:38:50,259 I'VE NEVER BEEN PROUDER OF YOU IN MY LIFE. 725 00:38:50,329 --> 00:38:52,829 MAMA, DO YOU MEAN THAT? 726 00:38:52,897 --> 00:38:54,831 I DO. 727 00:38:57,102 --> 00:38:59,836 BESIDES, I LEARNED SOMETHING TODAY. 728 00:38:59,905 --> 00:39:02,739 ALL THIS TRIVIA IS USELESS CLUTTER BANGING AROUND UNDER MY WIG. 729 00:39:02,807 --> 00:39:06,442 YOU TAUGHT ME NOT TO OVERVALUE SOMETHING JUST BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE IT 730 00:39:06,510 --> 00:39:08,745 AND THAT EVERYBODY HAS SOMETHING WORTH OFFERING 731 00:39:08,813 --> 00:39:10,346 IF YOU SEARCH FOR IT. 732 00:39:10,415 --> 00:39:12,615 THANK YOU, MAMA, THANK YOU. 733 00:39:12,684 --> 00:39:15,051 NOW, FOR CROSSING ME, YOU'RE GROUNDED FOR LIFE, 734 00:39:15,119 --> 00:39:17,820 AND I'M CUTTING YOU OUT OF THE WILL. 735 00:39:20,158 --> 00:39:23,560 THANKS FOR PLAYING A GAME WITH ME, MAMA. 736 00:39:32,871 --> 00:39:34,170 - HEY. - HEY. 737 00:39:34,238 --> 00:39:35,739 I WANT TO APOLOGIZE. 738 00:39:35,807 --> 00:39:37,607 NO. 739 00:39:37,676 --> 00:39:39,175 'CAUSE YOU WERE RIGHT. 740 00:39:39,243 --> 00:39:41,010 LILY, I'M REALLY SORRY. 741 00:39:41,079 --> 00:39:43,947 I WANTED SOMETHING TO BE TRUE SO BADLY 742 00:39:44,015 --> 00:39:45,782 THAT I MADE IT UP. 743 00:39:45,850 --> 00:39:47,183 AGAIN. 744 00:39:47,251 --> 00:39:49,018 BUT I'M THROUGH WITH THAT. 745 00:39:49,087 --> 00:39:52,321 OH, CARM, THERE'S MORE TO RELATIONSHIPS 746 00:39:52,391 --> 00:39:56,659 THAN JUST MAKING SURE YOU'RE IN THE SAME SCORING RANGE ON THE S.A.T.s. 747 00:39:56,728 --> 00:40:01,330 I'M REALLY TIRED OF MAKING A FOOL OUT OF MYSELF, LIL. 748 00:40:01,399 --> 00:40:04,100 PABLO JUST WANTED TO TEACH ME TO DANCE. 749 00:40:04,168 --> 00:40:07,403 AND I... I MISUNDERSTOOD HIM, 750 00:40:07,471 --> 00:40:08,971 STUPIDLY. 751 00:40:09,040 --> 00:40:11,307 HE WAS NEVER INTERESTED IN ME. 752 00:40:13,678 --> 00:40:17,279 TELL ME, THIS PABLO, IS HE ABOUT SIX FEET, 753 00:40:17,348 --> 00:40:20,116 SHORT BROWN HAIR, GREAT DIMPLES, 754 00:40:20,184 --> 00:40:22,184 KINDA NERVOUS? 755 00:40:27,191 --> 00:40:28,190 HELLO. 756 00:40:28,259 --> 00:40:29,992 HELLO, CARMEN. 757 00:40:31,897 --> 00:40:34,096 [CLEARS THROAT] UM... 758 00:40:34,165 --> 00:40:38,067 "I WOULD VERY MUCH LIKE TO ASK YOU 759 00:40:38,136 --> 00:40:40,069 "FOR A COFFEE, 760 00:40:40,138 --> 00:40:42,138 "OR A JUICE. 761 00:40:42,206 --> 00:40:43,873 PLEASE." 762 00:40:48,579 --> 00:40:49,879 PLEASE. 763 00:40:50,982 --> 00:40:52,315 SÍ. 764 00:40:52,383 --> 00:40:54,050 OKAY. 765 00:40:54,118 --> 00:40:57,286 MUCHO, MUCHO, SÍ. 766 00:41:05,063 --> 00:41:06,695 JOSH? 767 00:41:06,765 --> 00:41:08,130 OH, HEY, LILY. 768 00:41:11,035 --> 00:41:13,202 CONGRATULATIONS... 769 00:41:13,271 --> 00:41:15,572 ON YOUR BIG HEAD. 770 00:41:15,640 --> 00:41:19,709 THANKS. IT WOULD HAVE MEANT MORE IF YOU COULD HAVE BEEN THERE. 771 00:41:19,778 --> 00:41:21,945 I SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE. 772 00:41:22,013 --> 00:41:23,913 YEAH, YOU SHOULD HAVE. 773 00:41:23,982 --> 00:41:26,448 I THINK I FIGURED OUT WHAT HAPPENED. 774 00:41:26,517 --> 00:41:29,418 I HAVE BEEN SO FOCUSED ON THIS STUPID TEST 775 00:41:29,487 --> 00:41:32,789 AND HOW WELL WE'RE SUPPOSED TO DO ON IT, 776 00:41:32,857 --> 00:41:35,158 THAT I MADE YOU THINK IT WAS 777 00:41:35,226 --> 00:41:37,927 A MEASURE OF HOW SMART SOMEBODY IS. 778 00:41:37,996 --> 00:41:40,997 - YEP, YOU DID THAT. - AND I WAS WRONG. 779 00:41:41,065 --> 00:41:42,832 THERE'S DIFFERENT KINDS OF INTELLIGENCE, 780 00:41:42,901 --> 00:41:45,201 AND THIS TEST ONLY MEASURES ONE KIND. 781 00:41:45,269 --> 00:41:49,271 IT MAY BE GOOD AT FIGURING OUT HOW MUCH MATH OR ENGLISH SOMEBODY KNOWS, 782 00:41:49,340 --> 00:41:53,810 BUT IT DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT HOW YOU CARE ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS 783 00:41:53,878 --> 00:41:55,344 OR ME. 784 00:41:56,615 --> 00:41:58,548 I REALLY HOPE YOU MEAN THAT, 785 00:41:58,617 --> 00:42:02,251 'CAUSE THERE'S JUST THINGS I'M NEVER GONNA BE SMART ABOUT. 786 00:42:02,320 --> 00:42:06,189 HONEY, IT'S NOT ABOUT WHAT YOU LEARN. 787 00:42:06,257 --> 00:42:08,191 IT'S ABOUT WHAT YOU KNOW. 788 00:42:08,259 --> 00:42:12,862 IN YOUR HEART, AND ON ANY TEST ABOUT GOOD AND DECENT INSTINCTS, 789 00:42:12,931 --> 00:42:15,131 YOU'D SCORE THROUGH THE ROOF. 790 00:42:15,199 --> 00:42:17,566 AND THAT'S WHY... 791 00:42:17,635 --> 00:42:19,002 IT'S WHY... 792 00:42:19,070 --> 00:42:20,770 YOU'RE MADLY IN LOVE WITH ME? 793 00:42:20,839 --> 00:42:22,571 YES. 794 00:42:44,195 --> 00:42:47,729 ♪ TO BEND AND NOT TO BREAK 795 00:42:47,798 --> 00:42:51,400 ♪ CHIN UP, TRY NOT TO QUAKE 796 00:42:51,469 --> 00:42:54,904 ♪ I'M GRINNING ON THE OUTSIDE 797 00:42:54,973 --> 00:42:58,241 ♪ BUT I'M A WRECK INTERNALLY 798 00:43:01,146 --> 00:43:03,813 ♪ OOH, LA LA LA LA 799 00:43:08,419 --> 00:43:11,921 ♪ OOH, LA LA LA LA ♪