- Are you ready, kids?
all: Aye, aye, Captain!
- I can't hear you.
all: Aye, aye, Captain!
- ♪ Ohh... ♪
♪ Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪
all: SpongeBob SquarePants!
- ♪ Absorbent and yellow and porous is he ♪
all: SpongeBob SquarePants!
- ♪ If nautical nonsense be something you wish ♪
all: SpongeBob SquarePants!
- ♪ Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish ♪
all: SpongeBob SquarePants! - Ready?
all: SpongeBob SquarePants!
- SpongeBob
SquarePants!
[laughing]
♪ ♪
[waves crashing]
[groovy music]
♪ ♪
- [whistling]
- [groans]
[bell dings]
- Squidward, order up! -SpongeBob!
Don't you know how to keep quiet?
- I don't know, but hum a few bars,
and maybe I can fake it.
[laughs]
- [groans]
Sorry for getting angry with you, SpongeBob.
I'm just very concerned about your health, that's all.
- Oh, that's okay, Squidward. You know, just the other day,
I--what, my health?
- Yeah, it's probably nothing. Forget I brought it up.
- What about my health, Squidward?
What do you know?
What's my body been saying behind my back?
- [grunts]
Well, if you really want to know,
it's the gap between your teeth.
- My gap? I have a gap?
What's wrong with my gap? Gap!
- [shudders]
- A gap that big between your teeth
can be extremely dangerous.
You can get something caught in it.
- [grunts]
- It obstructs your airway, and now, you can't breathe.
- [wheezing]
I can't breathe, I can't breathe!
Call a doctor!
- No need to call a doctor, SpongeBob.
- [grunts]
- I will be your dentist.
- You will?
[groans]
- [groans]
Guess I got to use good old-fashioned tentacle grease.
[grunts]
- Ow!
- [grunting]
[drill whirrs]
- All better. That should seal up
that drafty gap. - Ah!
- And kill the whistling.
[laughs]
[deep voice] - Well, thank you,
Dr. Squidward!
Say, without a gap, my voice sounds almost...
cool.
Testing, testing, one, two, three.
You know, with this voice, I don't need whistling.
Oh, I've got to sing!
[jazzy music]
[jazz scatting]
Flip, flip, flip, flap!
[jazz scatting]
♪ ♪
- Oh, where is that heavenly voice coming from?
I must--huh?
- [jazz scatting]
- Oh, blowfish!
Does he have to ruin everything for me?
[groans]
- What a dreamy voice! - Wow, it really swings.
[clamoring]
- [jazz scatting]
- Hey, everybody, look. SpongeBob is cool now!
- [purrs]
- Hmm, maybe I can use SpongeBob
to get in with all those cool people at the jazz club.
Yeah!
[grunts]
- [purrs]
Yeah. - Hey, SpongeBob.
Owie, owie, owie, owie! Um, how would you
like to accompany me to my favorite jazz club tonight?
- Oh, boy, would I? That sounds so cool.
all: Aw!
[jazzy music]
♪ ♪
[snapping]
- Oh, man, that beat is so pure, it hurts.
- Ah, my people! Hey, hipsters.
It's groovy, cats. I can dig it.
all: Lame.
- Hm, turn away from me, huh? We'll just see.
Oh, it's past 8:00. Where is SpongeBob?
[jazzy music]
♪ ♪
[all gasp]
- Hey, cool crowd. What's shaking?
Oh, yeah.
Hey, hipsters. It's groovy, cats.
Oh, I can dig it.
- [yelps]
[shoes squeak]
- Oh, welcome, man.
You're the coolest customer we've ever had.
- Oh, crazy, Daddy. Crazy.
- Can I seat you at the coolest table?
♪ ♪
- No, thank you. I'm here to meet up
with a real cool cat.
Oh, there he is. Hey Squideroonie!
- Ah!
- [grunting]
[foghorn blares]
- You're with him?
- [groaning]
Yes, you're with me. And he is my--
best...friend...
- You heard the man, folks. He's by best friend.
Can you dig it? - Huh?
Huh.
- I guess he's...
cool?
- I don't know, man. Something smells lame.
- Hey, CoolBob, why don't you sing
everybody one of your singing cool tunes?
- Oh, no, Daddio. I really couldn't.
[snapping]
[grunting]
- Well, okay, maybe just one ditty.
Then I'll get out your hair.
- And I will accompany you on my licorice stick.
[groaning]
Just as I planned.
[laughs]
[off-key clarinet]
[groaning]
[boos]
- Would you care for a mute, sir?
All the great jazz musicians use mutes.
- Hey, that's right, they do. Thanks, Daddio.
- A-one, a-two, a bop-bubbly boo.
[gargles]
[jazz scatting]
[clamoring]
[jazzy music]
♪ ♪
[high-pitched jazz scatting]
- [gasps]
[high-pitched vocalizing]
[low-pitched jazz scatting]
[cheers and applause]
[snapping]
- At last, I'm cool! Mwah!
[laughs]
Go on, go on--
- That was so cool, it caused structural damage!
You got to play some more for us cats.
Don't leave us hanging.
[high voice] - Oh, aren't you nice, I--
- Uh, sorry, man. We're going to bounce, you dig?
Hey, we got to go spread some more joy, baby.
But we'll be back tomorrow night to blow the roof back on.
[cheers and applause]
- Yay--
[jazzy music]
- Thanks, Dr. Squidward. That was so much fun
being "cool" for one night.
- We are going to stay "cool" every night if it kills us!
Got it, Daddio? - Okay, best friend.
[laughs]
- We just have to make sure
that gap in your teeth stays closed.
Say cheese. - Chee-
[gargling]
- [grunting]
[bright music]
♪ ♪
You ready, Daddio?
[deep voice] - Baby, I was born ready.
[jazzy music]
[jazz scatting]
[cheers and applause]
♪ ♪
- Cool. - Real cool.
- This next one goes out to all the--
[high voice] ladies!
[high-pitched jazz scatting]
- [grunting]
- Take it, Squidward.
- I'm going to start this solo on a high note!
[sharp inhale]
[muffled notes]
[off-key clarinet]
[groaning]
- I knew he smelled lame.
- [low-pitched jazz scatting]
- [growling]
[jazz scatting]
- [groaning]
If I'm not allowed to be cool anymore,
then neither is SpongeBob!
[yells]
[groaning]
Oh, uh-huh.
[screams]
- [jazz scatting]
Zoop, zop, zlim, zlam, jam!
Bam!
[high voice] - Yeah, okay.
[groans]
Hey, my gap's back!
[murmuring]
- [groaning]
You see? He's not cool!
He's square! He's a food-flipping fraud.
- [laughs]
[whistles] Sorry.
Did you hear that! My whistle is back, too.
Who needs singing when you can whistle?
[whistles]
- [groaning]
all: Ooh, yeah.
- What--what's going on? Why are you snapping?
Stop snapping!
- That's the most righteous sound I've ever heard, man.
Follow the leader of cool!
[grunting]
[whistles]
[all grunting]
[whistling harmony]
- Hmm, you know what?
If that is what passes for "cool" now,
then I don't want to be cool anymore!
[grunts]
Huh?
[groans]
- Oh, you're not leaving this time
until you pay for the damages first, Daddio.
[whistling] - This stinks.
[groovy music]
♪ ♪