[surf rock music]
♪ ♪
- Well, class,
as anyone could tell from the looks of psychotic anticipation
on your faces, we have exactly one minute
until summer vacation.
[bell dings]
Oh, another year has passed,
and the official test results
show that you've learned nothing!
- Well, I've learned many things, Mr. Crocker.
For example, I--
- Keep it to yourself, toots!
You're killing my summer buzz.
[bell dings]
So long, suckers!
[jazzy music]
[laughing wildly]
[rocket charges, explodes]
[triumphant fanfare]
[teachers cheering]
[children cheering and laughing]
- Get ready to celebrate summer with the master, Chloe.
I wished up a water park and pirate boats with water cannons
and--wait for it--
real pirates!
- Yay, Timmy!
I know it's summer because I saw the teachers
flying through the air and the pirates are back!
- Argh. - Hello, matey.
- Hello.
- [laughing]
- I'm super excited about summer too,
because--wait for it-- [drumroll]
I've been accepted into a rigorous research program
identifying and labeling subatomic particles
in a dark, windowless basement!
[eyeball twitches]
- Avast, ye mateys.
Time to celebrate summer with me,
Greenbeard,
and whoever this weird dude is.
- It's me, Cosmo-- Pinkbeard!
Sorry we were late, guys.
We had to dodge falling teachers the whole way over.
- [wailing]
Yay, summer.
- Get this, guys.
Wendy Windowless Basement here is gonna spend her summer
studying supercalifragatomic party hats.
- Eh, close enough.
The point is, I'm 10 1/2 now.
And it's time for me to leave kid stuff behind
and grow up.
- I'm never growing up!
Cannonball!
[giggling]
[yelps]
Yay, summer!
- I'm even donating my toys to charity...
including my favorite doll--
Gender Neutral Jesse.
- [monotone voice] I love you.
- Aww.
- [yawns]
- Why are you yawning?
Are you boring yourself thinking about your summer?
- No, I was up all night doing research for my research--
pre-search, if you will.
- I won't. Count on it.
- [snoring and muttering] I wish--I wish--I wish...
- Oh, no! Chloe's sleep-wishing.
That can be dangerous.
But according to "Da Rules," we have to grant her wishes.
- Ooh, uh-huh? Uh-huh?
Yes?
If I'm not mistaken-- which I often am--
she wished for this.
[fanfare]
- [screams]
[menacing music]
[all screaming]
- I wouldn't want to change that diaper.
♪ ♪
[footsteps thundering]
[car alarm wailing]
Kids wish for the darndest things,
don't you think so, weird dude?
♪ ♪
- Mama, Papa,
or primary caregiver.
[electricity crackling]
- Aah! I unwish Chloe's wish!
[wands ding]
[magical pop]
I did not think that through.
Aah!
[pleasant morning music]
- Ahh. I had the weirdest dream.
- It wasn't a dream, Sally Sleep-Wish!
- This could be a problem.
Chloe needs to see Dr. Rip Studwell.
- I'm so free! [surf rock music]
I'm so going to the hospital!
Still better than teaching!
[calming music]
- [sighs]
[magical pop]
- Oh, thank goodness you're here, Dr. Rip Studwell.
Chloe's sleep-wishing.
- Oh, that's bad.
You should call a doctor.
- You are a doctor!
- You're technically correct, weird dude.
- You have to cure me, Dr. Rip Studwell.
I have to get healthy so I can spend my summer
in a dark, windowless room.
- Oh, no, this is the worst possible scenario.
- What is it, Dr. Rip Studwell?
- I don't know how to break this to you,
but I've been walking around with kale in my teeth.
- [gasps] That is NG with the ladies.
Am I right, weird dude?
- I'm gonna need to put a pin in the sleep-wish thing,
while I deal with my own emergency.
This is a Code Kale.
I need that water flosser stat, weird dude.
[magical pop]
[grunts]
Aah! You tousled my man-mane.
This is why I always go with a lady nurse.
- I am a lady!
Tell us how to cure the sleep-wishing!
- I've got the cure right here.
- "Place in a plastic bag, add salt and molasses,
seal shut, then check in seven days."
This isn't how you cure sleep-wishing!
It's how you cure bacon!
- Oh, no!
Is Bacon sick?
This is terrible news.
- You want more of this?
- Okay, okay.
Not the doctor-do.
The reason Chloe is sleep-wishing
is because something is unresolved in her subconscious.
That's fancy doctor talk
for "she's nutsy-cuckoo in her brain-holder."
- I'm not nutsy-cuckoo in the brain-holder.
And I can prove it with this decorative collage
of my daily brain scans.
[pager beeping and vibrating]
- This is an emergency.
I've got a manscape and a mani-pedi...
because I'm all man.
[bell dings]
- Get out!
- Timmy, it's summer! Come out and play!
[laughing]
- Come on, Chloe.
The pirate ship has a water slide on the poop deck.
- You said "poop"! I love summer!
[laughs]
- I wish I could, Timmy,
but I'm gonna have my own summer fun
here in my room, reading about subatomic particles
from my 30-pound textbook.
- Okay. Just to play it safe,
someone should stay here with Chloe to make sure
she doesn't fall asleep and make another nutty sleep-wish.
- I volunteer Greenbeard.
- You got it, weird dude.
I'm a little too worried
about Bacon's health to play anyway.
Oh, I should make him a card.
[magical pop]
- "Chapter One.
A subatomic particle is a particle smaller than an atom."
[water balloon pops, laughter]
- You took a water balloon in the crow's nest, Pinkbeard.
I never, ever, ever want to grow up.
- Avast, ye summer bummer!
- [sighs]
[magical pop]
[surf rock music] - Come on, Chloe.
You know you're all like,
"I want to yo-ho go outside and play."
- Do not listen to her, Fraulein Chloe.
Summer fun is strictly verboten!
And you are not funny. You are a nincompoop.
- You said "poop"!
- For what it's worth, Chloe, I agree with Chloe.
Now, would the three of you mind signing
my get-well card for Bacon?
[laughter, cheering]
[Dad laughs]
[light jingle playing]
The ice cream truck!
Whee!
[playful music]
[laughing]
[tires squeal]
Stop! I'm not dangerous! I'm a kid!
[magical pop] - Hey, Timmy. Hey, weird, dude.
By the way, has anyone seen Wanda?
- Uh, last time I saw her, she was standing
right in front of you with a pink beard!
- Well, if you see her again,
tell her I'm out of clean socks.
- More importantly, what are you doing here, Cosmo?
You were supposed to stay with Chloe
to make sure she didn't fall asleep.
- Well, I got bored, Timmy,
especially after she fell asleep.
[ground rumbles]
- Mama, Papa, or primary caregiver.
all: Oh, no! It's giant Gender Neutral Jesse!
[menacing music]
- And he--she--it-- they has Chloe!
Cosmo, Wanda, I unwish her sleep-wish!
[fanfare]
[wand rattles, flatulence]
[footsteps thunder]
- This would probably be a good time to tell you
that Chloe wished that this wish couldn't be unwished.
[light jingle plays]
- [laughs] Ooh!
I don't know what to get.
Snow cone, the Banana Bomb,
the Rainbow Rocket,
The Coco-Loco-Nut?
- A gender-neutral giant baby!
- Ooh, that sounds yummy.
I'll take one of those, with sprinkles!
Yay! There's free ice cream all over the street.
It's like delicious roadkill!
- This is nuts.
We got to do something to cure Chloe.
What did Dr. Rip Studwell say again?
- I know.
He had kale in his teeth.
- No, it was something else.
- I love bacon!
- He didn't say that.
- No, no, I just love bacon.
- No, he said something is unresolved
in Chloe's subconscious, wherever that is.
Cosmo, Wanda, poof us there!
[magical pop]
[dreamy harp music]
Wow. We're in Chloe's brain-holder.
- Aw, look, it's kindergarten Chloe.
- Timmy, Cosmo, Wanda?
Can you help me?
I just want to play with Gender Neutral Jesse,
but I can't find her.
All I have is this giant book
for big kids.
- Aww.
Big Chloe won't let Little Chloe play.
This is so sad. [cries]
- Good for you for being in touch
with your feminine side, weird dude.
- I get it.
Chloe really does want to have a fun summer.
But she's forcing herself to grow up too fast.
Don't worry, Little Chloe.
I know where your doll is.
[triumphant music]
♪ ♪
- Yay! Now I can play!
[whimsical music]
- Have fun, Little Chloe.
[magical ding]
[menacing music]
- [gasps] What am I doing?
I'm trying to grow up too fast, and I'm wasting my summer.
[magical ding]
- She's falling! Somebody else catch her!
[magical pop]
- Timmy, you saved me from myself.
- And you thanked me by flattening me like a pancake.
- Ooh, you know what goes good with pancakes?
Bacon! That reminds me.
Timmy, weird dude,
you haven't signed Bacon's get-well card.
- Okay, Cosmo.
It's me, Wanda,
and Bacon is not sick
because that doesn't make any sense!
- Weird dude, you're Wanda.
No wonder I had a little crush on you.
[magical ding]
[magical pop]
- Avast, ye mateys!
It is I, Blondebeard.
And we're gonna have the best summer ever,
starting right now,
because I'm a kid!
- So am I!
We're the luckiest kids in the world!
Yay, summer!
- [monotone voice] I love summer.
[magical chimes]
- Hello, Bacon.
I've got good news and bad news.
The goods news is that I am, without a doubt,
the most handsome doctor in the universe.
- And what's the bad news?
- You're cured.
- Wait, you mean I'm better?
- No, you're cured, like all delicious bacon should be.
Better yet, there's enough of you to make sandwiches
for all 11 beautiful nurses I'm having lunch with today.
Well, ten beautiful nurses.
Nurse Debbie is just so-so.
Now, if you don't mind,
I'm gonna take these get-well flowers Cosmo sent you
and use them to woo the nurses.
After all, you won't be needing them.
- [sighs] So this is how it ends.
- Actually,
it ended when Chloe stopped sleep-wishing.
There's no such thing as talking bacon!
Now, say it with me, boys!
all: Yay, summer!
[surf rock music ends]