1 00:00:01,126 --> 00:00:03,762 Tomorrow our lawyer, Joseph Stanford, is coming by. 2 00:00:04,292 --> 00:00:07,836 -Crazy Sissy's dad. -That's terrible. You were good friends. 3 00:00:08,082 --> 00:00:10,309 She spoke to her stuffed animals, and they answered. 4 00:00:10,498 --> 00:00:12,690 -Let's start a new topic. -You're impossible. 5 00:00:12,871 --> 00:00:13,871 She said a new topic. 6 00:00:13,996 --> 00:00:16,188 Everything's a joke. Everyone's a punch line. 7 00:00:16,369 --> 00:00:17,562 Okay, I'm sorry. 8 00:00:17,702 --> 00:00:19,213 My daughter, Henny Youngman. 9 00:00:19,368 --> 00:00:22,560 Sorry for that. A little trouble in our China office. 10 00:00:22,784 --> 00:00:24,533 Well, what did I miss? 11 00:00:24,699 --> 00:00:27,494 I was being impossible. Then I turned into a Jewish comedian. 12 00:00:28,906 --> 00:00:31,496 -Continue. -Thank you. Where was I? 13 00:00:31,863 --> 00:00:34,010 Joseph Stanford is coming tomorrow. 14 00:00:34,196 --> 00:00:38,343 Yes. So, Rory, your grandfather and I thought it might be nice after dinner... 15 00:00:38,610 --> 00:00:42,280 to go around the house and pick out what you'd like us to leave you in our will. 16 00:00:42,525 --> 00:00:46,070 Take a look at that desk in my office. It's a really fine Georgian piece. 17 00:00:46,315 --> 00:00:48,951 Why don't I ever bring a tape recorder to these dinners? 18 00:00:49,147 --> 00:00:50,738 Anything you want to leave me is fine. 19 00:00:50,897 --> 00:00:53,850 Nonsense. You should have what you like. Just look around. 20 00:00:54,062 --> 00:00:56,414 When you see something you like, stick a Post-it on it. 21 00:00:56,602 --> 00:01:00,386 Okay, you two have officially hit a new level of weird that even I marvel at. 22 00:01:00,642 --> 00:01:03,516 -You can pick out things, too. -Now it's way less creepy. 23 00:01:03,724 --> 00:01:06,110 Did you hear that, Richard? Apparently we're creepy. 24 00:01:06,306 --> 00:01:08,261 Yes, well, you live and learn. 25 00:01:08,889 --> 00:01:10,718 -Oh, cool. -What's that? 26 00:01:11,096 --> 00:01:12,891 -It's dessert. -It's pudding. 27 00:01:13,054 --> 00:01:15,042 If you knew what it was, why did you ask? 28 00:01:15,219 --> 00:01:18,206 -You don't like pudding. -Yes, but you like pudding. 29 00:01:18,426 --> 00:01:20,460 I love pudding. I worship it. 30 00:01:20,633 --> 00:01:22,144 I have a bowl up on the mantel... 31 00:01:22,300 --> 00:01:24,765 with the Virgin Mary, a glass of wine, and $1 next to it. 32 00:01:24,965 --> 00:01:27,158 I've never had pudding from a crystal bowl before. 33 00:01:27,339 --> 00:01:28,930 You like the bowl? 34 00:01:29,504 --> 00:01:32,015 Put a Post-it on it when you're done. 35 00:02:33,643 --> 00:02:35,756 So, what do we think of this? 36 00:02:36,183 --> 00:02:38,330 -Where would we put it? -I don't know. 37 00:02:38,516 --> 00:02:41,265 The Emily and Richard Gilmore Psycho Museum? 38 00:02:41,764 --> 00:02:44,150 This is the strangest evening I've ever spent here. 39 00:02:44,347 --> 00:02:45,574 So, how are we doing? 40 00:02:45,722 --> 00:02:48,232 Great. Just getting ready for the big day. 41 00:02:48,429 --> 00:02:51,019 -Very nice. -It's getting late, Mom. 42 00:02:51,219 --> 00:02:54,809 Unless you've got some funeral plots for us to decorate, we should really get going. 43 00:02:55,050 --> 00:02:57,402 Any special requests for dinner next week? 44 00:02:58,300 --> 00:03:00,129 Mom, I want to talk to you for a minute. 45 00:03:00,299 --> 00:03:03,332 And, Rory, why don't you go say goodbye to Grandpa? 46 00:03:03,547 --> 00:03:04,865 Very smooth. 47 00:03:06,837 --> 00:03:07,837 Shall I sit down? 48 00:03:07,962 --> 00:03:10,837 Yeah, but not there, okay? We got a Post-it on that. 49 00:03:11,043 --> 00:03:12,634 We'd like to keep it nice. 50 00:03:12,793 --> 00:03:14,906 It must be very exhausting to be you. 51 00:03:15,084 --> 00:03:17,992 -Mom, Rory's birthday is next Friday. -I know that. 52 00:03:18,207 --> 00:03:21,797 So, we were thinking that maybe we could push our dinner next week to Saturday. 53 00:03:22,622 --> 00:03:24,815 -What're you going to do on Friday? -I don't know... 54 00:03:24,996 --> 00:03:26,555 Come here, and we'll have a little party. 55 00:03:26,579 --> 00:03:29,805 -Can we do it another night? -Why another night when her birthday is... 56 00:03:30,035 --> 00:03:31,592 on the exact night that you come here. 57 00:03:31,743 --> 00:03:33,890 -Saturday's a good night. -Not as good as Friday. 58 00:03:34,075 --> 00:03:36,075 -Pretty damn close. -Not from where I'm standing. 59 00:03:36,199 --> 00:03:37,427 Move then. 60 00:03:37,991 --> 00:03:40,786 I'm sorry. Friday nights are my nights. 61 00:03:40,989 --> 00:03:44,341 That's what we agreed on when you borrowed money for her school. 62 00:03:44,571 --> 00:03:48,446 I didn't intend for this loan to become a constant source of blackmail, okay? 63 00:03:48,694 --> 00:03:51,205 This is my kid's birthday, and she will have her party... 64 00:03:51,401 --> 00:03:53,356 at home on Friday, and that's it. 65 00:03:53,525 --> 00:03:54,922 End of story. 66 00:03:56,816 --> 00:03:59,565 So, how would you like two parties this year? 67 00:03:59,772 --> 00:04:01,727 -You couldn't get her to cave. -No. 68 00:04:01,896 --> 00:04:04,771 But she did agree to make the string quartet learn Like a Virgin. 69 00:04:04,979 --> 00:04:06,092 Well, you tried. 70 00:04:06,228 --> 00:04:09,818 Sweetie, I promise, Saturday night we'll do it up right at home. 71 00:04:10,060 --> 00:04:11,968 A Stars Hollow extravaganza. 72 00:04:12,143 --> 00:04:14,892 So, is this party Grandma's having going to be a big deal? 73 00:04:15,099 --> 00:04:16,372 Not really. 74 00:04:17,181 --> 00:04:20,613 The government will close that day. Flags will fly at half-mast. 75 00:04:20,847 --> 00:04:23,915 Barbra Streisand will give her final concert again. 76 00:04:24,137 --> 00:04:27,091 The Pope has previous plans, but he's trying to get out of them. 77 00:04:27,302 --> 00:04:30,051 However, Elvis and Jim Morrison are coming... 78 00:04:30,260 --> 00:04:33,771 -and they're bringing chips. -You ask a simple question... 79 00:04:35,091 --> 00:04:38,397 SOOKIE: Mini orange biscuits with honey-mustard ham and cheddar cheese. 80 00:04:39,172 --> 00:04:41,445 -Angel wings with dipping sauce. -Good. 81 00:04:41,629 --> 00:04:43,538 -Did you bring me the picture? -Yes. 82 00:04:43,712 --> 00:04:46,223 Too bad you couldn't get your mom to relinquish Friday. 83 00:04:46,419 --> 00:04:49,726 -She has her Vulcan death grip on that. -Not that surprising though. 84 00:04:49,959 --> 00:04:52,550 Emily Gilmore. You could set your watch by her. 85 00:04:52,749 --> 00:04:55,101 -You know what she did do last night? -Wore jeans. 86 00:04:55,290 --> 00:04:57,244 -Served pudding. -I was close. 87 00:04:57,415 --> 00:04:59,483 I'm sure it was some expensive form of pudding... 88 00:04:59,663 --> 00:05:01,140 but nonetheless, it was pudding! 89 00:05:01,287 --> 00:05:02,844 -That is amazing. -Right? 90 00:05:02,996 --> 00:05:06,029 That would mean that she made a mental note that we liked pudding. 91 00:05:06,244 --> 00:05:08,834 Which would mean she actually listened to something other than... 92 00:05:09,034 --> 00:05:11,943 the judgmental conga line in her head, and got over the fact that... 93 00:05:12,158 --> 00:05:14,358 to her, pudding is hospital food, and only acceptable... 94 00:05:14,490 --> 00:05:16,842 when you've just had a vital organ ripped out of your body. 95 00:05:17,031 --> 00:05:19,667 That's some journey she had to take there. 96 00:05:19,862 --> 00:05:22,737 -Open your mouth and close your eyes. -Who are you talking to? 97 00:05:22,945 --> 00:05:24,092 Right, sorry. 98 00:05:24,236 --> 00:05:26,668 -Open your mouth and close your eyes. -Okay. 99 00:05:26,859 --> 00:05:29,370 Get ready for something truly amazing. 100 00:05:33,065 --> 00:05:34,815 -What is it? -I don't know. 101 00:05:34,982 --> 00:05:36,777 -It's like a... -A what? 102 00:05:36,981 --> 00:05:40,651 -It's like a berry, but way more exotic. -Yes. Good. 103 00:05:40,895 --> 00:05:43,610 Have you been having reactions to your fertilizer fumes again? 104 00:05:43,811 --> 00:05:46,526 For some time now I've been toying with cross-pollination. 105 00:05:46,726 --> 00:05:47,794 Finally, I've got it. 106 00:05:47,934 --> 00:05:51,127 I figured out a way to cross a raspberry with a kumquat. 107 00:05:51,349 --> 00:05:53,622 -Kumquat! That's what I taste! -Are you serious? 108 00:05:53,807 --> 00:05:55,034 How did you do this? 109 00:05:55,181 --> 00:05:57,566 You didn't build a machine like in The Fly, did you? 110 00:05:57,763 --> 00:06:01,513 Will we find you wandering the streets with a raspberry head crying, "Eat me"? 111 00:06:01,803 --> 00:06:02,803 You! 112 00:06:03,011 --> 00:06:07,316 You can make fun of me all you want to, because today I am a god. 113 00:06:07,717 --> 00:06:10,704 Today Mother Nature has bowed down to me! 114 00:06:11,007 --> 00:06:12,598 How nice for her. 115 00:06:12,965 --> 00:06:15,317 -Michel, Jackson... -No need to fill me in. 116 00:06:15,506 --> 00:06:17,891 I'm quite happy being ignorant of whatever it is... 117 00:06:18,088 --> 00:06:20,473 that is making him raise his arms over his head. 118 00:06:20,670 --> 00:06:23,181 -Do you need me? -The landscaper does. 119 00:06:25,584 --> 00:06:27,572 Rory's birthday party is Saturday night. 120 00:06:27,750 --> 00:06:30,215 So start thinking up reasons why you can't come. 121 00:06:30,415 --> 00:06:32,971 -I'm going to be out of town. -You used that last year. 122 00:06:33,164 --> 00:06:36,948 -I'll work on it and get back to you. -7:00. Presents mandatory. 123 00:06:37,954 --> 00:06:39,102 Rasquat? 124 00:06:40,119 --> 00:06:42,505 -Lucy, I'm home! -Kitchen. 125 00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:45,716 "And Justin is just so dreamy. He can't marry Britney." 126 00:06:45,909 --> 00:06:47,738 "I'll just cry, cry, and cry." 127 00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:49,260 Okay, thanks. 128 00:06:50,157 --> 00:06:53,224 -Pizza's on its way. -You're such a good provider. 129 00:06:54,613 --> 00:06:58,681 I'm gonna go start my homework. Call me when the pizza guy gets here. 130 00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:00,997 [PHONE RINGING] 131 00:07:04,109 --> 00:07:06,415 -Hello? -Lorelai, what is your work schedule? 132 00:07:06,608 --> 00:07:08,596 -Why? -I want to go shopping. 133 00:07:09,524 --> 00:07:11,478 -With me? -I think that goes without saying. 134 00:07:11,648 --> 00:07:14,443 -Only in your world. -I want to get Rory a birthday present. 135 00:07:14,647 --> 00:07:16,442 I'm sure whatever you get her, she'll love. 136 00:07:16,604 --> 00:07:18,844 I want to get her something special, something she wants. 137 00:07:18,936 --> 00:07:21,243 Something that you would get her. 138 00:07:21,477 --> 00:07:23,306 Okay, fine. You can get her the bong then. 139 00:07:23,476 --> 00:07:28,020 This isn't funny. I hardly see the girl. We only get to talk at dinner once a week. 140 00:07:28,307 --> 00:07:30,454 And then it's all about school, and Jane. 141 00:07:30,640 --> 00:07:31,673 Lane, Mom. 142 00:07:31,806 --> 00:07:34,953 I thought you might let me into your secret club just this one time... 143 00:07:35,179 --> 00:07:37,452 and help me buy her something for her birthday. 144 00:07:37,637 --> 00:07:40,227 -You're serious? -According to you, I'm always serious. 145 00:07:41,551 --> 00:07:43,585 -Okay? -Okay. 146 00:07:44,175 --> 00:07:45,289 Well, good. 147 00:07:45,424 --> 00:07:47,571 I'll meet you at Damion's, tomorrow at 3:00. 148 00:07:47,757 --> 00:07:48,791 Okay. 149 00:07:48,923 --> 00:07:51,798 -And dress... -Don't finish that sentence, Mom. 150 00:07:52,588 --> 00:07:54,781 -I'll see you tomorrow. -Attagirl. 151 00:08:03,292 --> 00:08:05,598 -What, Tristin? -I wanted to say, "Happy birthday." 152 00:08:05,791 --> 00:08:08,506 -It's not my birthday. -No, but it will be. 153 00:08:09,581 --> 00:08:11,966 "On Friday at 4:03 in the morning, Lorelai..." 154 00:08:12,163 --> 00:08:13,560 What is that? 155 00:08:17,286 --> 00:08:18,399 Who else got these? 156 00:08:18,535 --> 00:08:21,330 I don't know. Everyone in our class, I think. 157 00:08:22,450 --> 00:08:23,847 I have to go. 158 00:08:24,407 --> 00:08:26,203 I'll see you Friday, birthday girl. 159 00:08:30,030 --> 00:08:31,144 PARIS: That's her. 160 00:08:31,404 --> 00:08:33,154 GIRL: My parents are making me go. 161 00:08:33,363 --> 00:08:36,396 -Another obligation party. -My life stinks. 162 00:08:42,108 --> 00:08:45,539 -Isn't this lovely? -Oh, yeah. 163 00:08:45,774 --> 00:08:49,080 As soon as we have her crowned Queen of England, we'll give it to her. 164 00:08:49,314 --> 00:08:52,620 -You are so combative today. -Hot weather does that to me. 165 00:08:53,686 --> 00:08:55,754 Mom, look. This is good. 166 00:08:56,602 --> 00:08:57,602 What is that? 167 00:08:57,727 --> 00:08:59,920 It's a purse shaped like a guitar. This is great. 168 00:09:00,100 --> 00:09:01,418 -Great for what? -For Rory. 169 00:09:01,558 --> 00:09:04,307 -What would Rory do with this? -Put stuff in it and carry it. 170 00:09:04,515 --> 00:09:05,787 -In public? -Yes. 171 00:09:05,931 --> 00:09:09,714 -What would people think? -That she's an ax murderer, of course. 172 00:09:12,262 --> 00:09:13,853 What about pearls? 173 00:09:15,011 --> 00:09:16,158 Pearls? 174 00:09:16,344 --> 00:09:19,014 A double string of pearls with a cashmere sweater set. 175 00:09:19,217 --> 00:09:22,250 Mom, she's a young girl. Think of something young. 176 00:09:23,673 --> 00:09:24,821 A Montblanc pen? 177 00:09:24,965 --> 00:09:27,430 -To put on her desk at the law firm? -She needs to write. 178 00:09:27,631 --> 00:09:29,937 Not with a $200 pen, she doesn't. 179 00:09:33,377 --> 00:09:34,605 Oh, hey, look. 180 00:09:35,377 --> 00:09:37,251 These day planners are adorable. 181 00:09:37,418 --> 00:09:40,883 You could get her the funky eraser with the mermaid on it. She'll love that. 182 00:09:41,124 --> 00:09:43,158 Please be serious. We're shopping for Rory. 183 00:09:43,332 --> 00:09:47,286 I'm shopping for her. You're shopping for an imaginary grandchild, Barbara Hutton. 184 00:09:47,538 --> 00:09:48,890 I want to get her something nice. 185 00:09:49,038 --> 00:09:51,231 You asked for my help, but you're not listening. 186 00:09:51,412 --> 00:09:54,048 You wanted me to get her a Filofax and a mermaid eraser. 187 00:09:54,244 --> 00:09:55,516 -It's one suggestion. -Yes. 188 00:09:55,659 --> 00:09:57,772 And the T-shirt with the Farrah Fawcett face. 189 00:09:57,950 --> 00:10:01,222 A hero to many who aspire to the perfect feather flip. 190 00:10:01,449 --> 00:10:03,960 I don't know how to do this. Let's just go. 191 00:10:04,156 --> 00:10:07,349 No. Come on, Mom. You do know how to do this. 192 00:10:07,821 --> 00:10:09,253 Think pudding. 193 00:10:09,987 --> 00:10:11,020 Pudding? 194 00:10:11,153 --> 00:10:13,187 Come on, you asked for my help. 195 00:10:13,360 --> 00:10:16,428 You're reaching out. A little, not a lot. Don't get freaked. 196 00:10:16,650 --> 00:10:19,161 -But, Mom, pudding. -Why do you keep saying "pudding"? 197 00:10:19,357 --> 00:10:23,141 Just look around and pick up something you think she might like. 198 00:10:32,144 --> 00:10:33,178 Here. 199 00:10:34,226 --> 00:10:35,897 Now, that's really good. 200 00:10:36,058 --> 00:10:37,377 -Really? -Absolutely. 201 00:10:37,516 --> 00:10:39,584 Looks like something you could buy at a car wash? 202 00:10:39,765 --> 00:10:41,436 Totally. That's half the charm. 203 00:10:41,639 --> 00:10:44,673 -Oh, no, it's only $12. -$6 more than a car wash. 204 00:10:44,930 --> 00:10:46,600 $12 is not a present. 205 00:10:46,762 --> 00:10:49,716 $12 is a perfect present, Mom. She'll love that. 206 00:10:51,136 --> 00:10:53,806 Can I at least get her the pashmina also? 207 00:10:55,342 --> 00:10:57,569 -Fine, I'll get it. -Good choice. 208 00:10:58,507 --> 00:10:59,904 It lights up. 209 00:11:07,045 --> 00:11:08,192 She's not here yet. 210 00:11:08,336 --> 00:11:11,085 All right. You'll have to entertain me until she arrives. 211 00:11:11,294 --> 00:11:12,964 Okay, burger boy, dance. 212 00:11:13,126 --> 00:11:15,114 -Will you marry me? -What? 213 00:11:15,625 --> 00:11:17,931 Just looking for something to shut you up. 214 00:11:18,124 --> 00:11:20,237 Better be nice to me, or I'm not inviting you... 215 00:11:20,415 --> 00:11:23,085 to Rory Gilmore's birthday celebration this Saturday night. 216 00:11:23,289 --> 00:11:25,004 You don't have to ask me, you know. 217 00:11:25,163 --> 00:11:27,594 I know. But I would like you to come. 218 00:11:27,786 --> 00:11:29,104 -Yeah? -Yeah. 219 00:11:30,119 --> 00:11:32,584 -Okay, I'll see. -7:00. Don't be late. 220 00:11:37,699 --> 00:11:39,926 Wow, nice face you got on there. 221 00:11:41,197 --> 00:11:43,105 -Coffee. -Bad day? 222 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:46,552 I've now used the word "suck" so much that it's lost all meaning to me. 223 00:11:46,778 --> 00:11:48,573 Maybe this will cheer you up. 224 00:11:48,736 --> 00:11:50,532 -What? -You'll see. 225 00:11:54,858 --> 00:11:57,846 -What is that? -These are our party dresses. 226 00:11:58,356 --> 00:11:59,867 So it's a Halloween party? 227 00:12:00,022 --> 00:12:03,214 Listen, you. So I'm shopping today with your grandmother... 228 00:12:03,438 --> 00:12:06,903 and it's a whole three hours of, "Who are you buying that for, Mom? 229 00:12:07,145 --> 00:12:10,894 "Have you met Rory?" And then finally I talked and she listened. 230 00:12:11,143 --> 00:12:14,097 She wound up getting you something I think you're gonna like. 231 00:12:14,307 --> 00:12:15,659 -Really? -Yes, really. 232 00:12:15,807 --> 00:12:17,875 And she insisted on buying us these dresses. 233 00:12:18,056 --> 00:12:20,283 But I think I can do something to make them better. 234 00:12:20,472 --> 00:12:23,744 I've never seen you so cheery after spending time with Grandma. 235 00:12:23,971 --> 00:12:27,560 It's been a long time since we got together and didn't end up fighting. 236 00:12:27,802 --> 00:12:30,075 It was refreshing. It wasn't exactly fun... 237 00:12:30,260 --> 00:12:33,804 but I didn't get that shooting pain in my eye like I usually do. 238 00:12:34,049 --> 00:12:35,640 -That's great. -Yeah. 239 00:12:35,841 --> 00:12:37,670 So I hear you're having a party Saturday. 240 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:39,828 Yeah. Mom's famous for her blowouts. 241 00:12:40,006 --> 00:12:42,676 -The best one was her eighth birthday. -Yeah, that was good. 242 00:12:42,878 --> 00:12:45,832 -The cops shut us down. -Shut down an 8-year-old's birthday party? 243 00:12:46,044 --> 00:12:47,601 And arrested the clown. 244 00:12:47,751 --> 00:12:49,626 I don't want to hear any more of this. 245 00:12:52,166 --> 00:12:54,756 So now tell me, why Miss Lemonhead today? 246 00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:57,187 Nothing. I'm fine. 247 00:12:57,373 --> 00:13:00,838 I just got an A-minus on a French test that I should have gotten an A on. 248 00:13:01,620 --> 00:13:03,927 Honey, an A-minus is awesome. 249 00:13:04,703 --> 00:13:06,214 Yeah, it's fine. 250 00:13:07,576 --> 00:13:08,848 Let me see. 251 00:13:09,243 --> 00:13:12,276 Maybe we should really embrace the whole tulle thing. 252 00:13:12,491 --> 00:13:15,240 Go totally modern Cinderella. What do you think? 253 00:13:15,448 --> 00:13:17,118 It's your birthday. 254 00:13:17,364 --> 00:13:19,272 Yeah, lucky me. 255 00:13:35,814 --> 00:13:38,121 Happy birthday, little girl. 256 00:13:53,057 --> 00:13:55,488 I can't believe how fast you're growing up. 257 00:13:55,681 --> 00:13:56,828 Really? 258 00:13:57,388 --> 00:14:01,058 -Feels slow. -Trust me, it's fast. 259 00:14:01,970 --> 00:14:05,878 -What do you think of your life so far? -I think it's pretty good. 260 00:14:06,343 --> 00:14:07,819 Any complaints? 261 00:14:09,008 --> 00:14:11,883 I'd like that whole humidity thing to go away. 262 00:14:12,215 --> 00:14:14,283 All right. I'll work on that. 263 00:14:14,464 --> 00:14:15,861 So, do I look older? 264 00:14:16,588 --> 00:14:18,258 Oh, yeah. 265 00:14:18,712 --> 00:14:21,779 You walk into Denny's before 5:00, you've got yourself a discount. 266 00:14:22,002 --> 00:14:23,274 Good deal. 267 00:14:24,085 --> 00:14:26,392 -So, you know what I think? -What? 268 00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:31,692 I think you're a great, cool kid, and the best friend a girl could have. 269 00:14:31,998 --> 00:14:33,316 Back at you. 270 00:14:33,872 --> 00:14:38,178 And it's so hard to believe that at exactly this time... 271 00:14:38,453 --> 00:14:42,237 many moons ago, I was lying in exactly the same position... 272 00:14:42,494 --> 00:14:44,845 Oh, boy, here we go. 273 00:14:45,034 --> 00:14:48,579 Only I had a huge, fat stomach, and big, fat ankles. 274 00:14:48,825 --> 00:14:50,574 And I was swearing like a sailor... 275 00:14:50,740 --> 00:14:53,125 -On leave. -On leave, right. 276 00:14:53,614 --> 00:14:56,284 -And there I was... -In labor. 277 00:14:56,488 --> 00:15:00,839 And while some have called it the most meaningful experience of your life... 278 00:15:01,110 --> 00:15:04,541 to me it was something more akin to doing the splits... 279 00:15:04,776 --> 00:15:06,446 on a crate of dynamite. 280 00:15:06,608 --> 00:15:08,801 I wonder if the Waltons ever did this. 281 00:15:08,982 --> 00:15:11,697 And I was screaming and swearing... 282 00:15:12,064 --> 00:15:16,256 and being surrounded as I was by a hundred prominent doctors... 283 00:15:16,521 --> 00:15:19,793 I just assumed there was an actual use... 284 00:15:20,019 --> 00:15:22,894 -for the cup of ice chips they gave me. -There wasn't. 285 00:15:23,101 --> 00:15:25,896 But pelting the nurses sure was fun. 286 00:15:27,432 --> 00:15:28,943 I love you, Mom. 287 00:15:29,099 --> 00:15:31,735 We're getting to the part where he sees your head. 288 00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:34,601 So there I was, lying... 289 00:15:35,471 --> 00:15:37,220 You shouldn't have to go to school today. 290 00:15:37,386 --> 00:15:40,056 -I have to. Latin test. -Jeez. Every day you have a test. 291 00:15:40,260 --> 00:15:42,407 Do you have time to learn anything to be tested on? 292 00:15:42,592 --> 00:15:44,978 -Wrong table. -Since when is there a right table? 293 00:15:45,175 --> 00:15:48,561 Since the coffee cake I baked for you, and the stupid balloons I blew up... 294 00:15:48,798 --> 00:15:50,945 are at that table, over there. 295 00:15:51,339 --> 00:15:53,452 -You blew up balloons for me? -Yeah. 296 00:15:53,630 --> 00:15:55,265 Luke, you old softy. 297 00:15:55,420 --> 00:15:58,010 -I count to three, it's gone. -Thank you. 298 00:16:02,708 --> 00:16:05,299 -Are you okay? -Yeah, I just... 299 00:16:06,374 --> 00:16:08,170 I'm getting old, Lane. 300 00:16:08,498 --> 00:16:12,123 -You seem a little quiet this morning. -I'm just dreading this whole night. 301 00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:15,803 It's bad enough that I have to see these stupid kids from Chilton every day. 302 00:16:16,036 --> 00:16:18,025 But tonight, on my birthday? 303 00:16:18,202 --> 00:16:20,236 I've never even talked to most of them. 304 00:16:20,409 --> 00:16:23,840 I've only been going to this school for a couple of months. 305 00:16:24,075 --> 00:16:26,790 God, they're gonna think I am the biggest freak. 306 00:16:26,990 --> 00:16:29,500 That I need my grandma to get people to come to my party. 307 00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,651 What did Lorelai say when you told her? 308 00:16:31,821 --> 00:16:33,491 -I didn't. -Why not? 309 00:16:34,570 --> 00:16:37,603 -Because of the pudding. -Right, I forgot about the pudding. 310 00:16:37,818 --> 00:16:39,806 My grandmother served us pudding the other night. 311 00:16:39,984 --> 00:16:42,972 Then she went shopping with my mom, and they didn't fight. 312 00:16:43,191 --> 00:16:46,656 I mean, they're never getting along. And now, suddenly, they're getting along. 313 00:16:46,898 --> 00:16:50,727 I knew that if I told Mom about the invite, she'd wig out and call Grandma... 314 00:16:50,979 --> 00:16:52,809 and that would be the end of the pudding. 315 00:16:52,978 --> 00:16:55,125 You know, you can buy pudding. 316 00:16:55,769 --> 00:16:57,916 -It's one night, right? -Right. 317 00:16:58,143 --> 00:17:00,256 I can stand it for one night. 318 00:17:09,221 --> 00:17:10,937 Coffee to go, please. 319 00:17:21,925 --> 00:17:23,640 -Here you go. -Thanks. 320 00:17:32,878 --> 00:17:36,184 -Why are you smiling? -I'm just thinking about pudding. 321 00:17:37,709 --> 00:17:40,016 EMILY: No, not there. In the living room. 322 00:17:40,750 --> 00:17:42,704 Why are you touching that? 323 00:17:42,874 --> 00:17:44,748 -I was just... -Well, don't! 324 00:17:44,915 --> 00:17:47,585 I want those 6 inches apart. Get a ruler. 325 00:17:47,830 --> 00:17:50,215 -Emily. -Let me do that. 326 00:17:50,621 --> 00:17:52,495 I hope the Larsons are coming tonight. 327 00:17:52,661 --> 00:17:55,614 Richard, no business. This is your granddaughter's party. 328 00:17:55,826 --> 00:17:58,546 I don't think five minutes of shoptalk is going to spoil the evening. 329 00:17:58,575 --> 00:18:00,211 -Five minutes, please. -Emily... 330 00:18:00,366 --> 00:18:03,752 If I ever heard you keep your shoptalk down to five minutes, I'd drop dead. 331 00:18:03,989 --> 00:18:06,500 I could drop dead, and you wouldn't stop talking business. 332 00:18:06,696 --> 00:18:09,128 You'd just step over my body to get to the speakerphone. 333 00:18:09,321 --> 00:18:11,627 -What? -You look very nice tonight. 334 00:18:12,903 --> 00:18:14,175 Thank you. 335 00:18:14,319 --> 00:18:15,750 [DOOR BELL RINGING] 336 00:18:23,856 --> 00:18:27,128 Jeez, Mom, leave some servants for the rest of the neighborhood. 337 00:18:27,354 --> 00:18:30,263 -There she is, the birthday girl. -Hi, Grandma. 338 00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:32,352 Wow, you really went all out. 339 00:18:32,518 --> 00:18:34,791 I wanted everything to be perfect. What do you think? 340 00:18:34,976 --> 00:18:38,010 Edith Wharton would have been proud, and busy taking notes. 341 00:18:38,224 --> 00:18:40,020 -Here, babe, go change. -Okay. 342 00:18:40,182 --> 00:18:41,251 Hurry. 343 00:18:42,598 --> 00:18:45,347 -What is that? -That's my dress. 344 00:18:45,555 --> 00:18:47,623 -Where's the one I bought you? -This is it. 345 00:18:47,803 --> 00:18:49,122 I thought there was more of it. 346 00:18:49,261 --> 00:18:52,295 -Mom, the place looks great. -Did you turn Rory's into a hat? 347 00:18:52,510 --> 00:18:54,578 Nice candles. 6 inches apart? 348 00:19:00,007 --> 00:19:02,802 You're drinking white wine tonight? No Scotch? 349 00:19:05,713 --> 00:19:09,099 Excuse me. I'm going to sit over there with my daughter. 350 00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:12,029 Here. 351 00:19:12,168 --> 00:19:14,157 -What is it? -Shirley Temple. 352 00:19:14,417 --> 00:19:17,644 -What are you drinking? -A Shirley Temple Black. 353 00:19:20,373 --> 00:19:23,406 I got your Good Ship Lollipop right here, mister. 354 00:19:24,204 --> 00:19:26,158 So, do you want something to eat? 355 00:19:26,328 --> 00:19:28,044 Everything smells funny. 356 00:19:28,202 --> 00:19:31,747 There you are. Come. There's some people I want you to meet. 357 00:19:35,158 --> 00:19:36,874 -Lorelai? -Yeah. 358 00:19:37,824 --> 00:19:41,210 Oh, my God! Oh, Mitzi, wow, I haven't seen you since... 359 00:19:41,447 --> 00:19:42,561 Your seventh month. 360 00:19:42,697 --> 00:19:44,651 I was gonna say high school, but okay. 361 00:19:44,821 --> 00:19:46,809 -Oh, no. Did I say something rude? -No. 362 00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:50,100 No, I did. I said something rude. I've been trying to work on that. 363 00:19:50,318 --> 00:19:51,465 Well, a noble goal. 364 00:19:51,609 --> 00:19:54,518 Ever since my divorce, I've been really trying to work on myself. 365 00:19:54,733 --> 00:19:56,801 I just... I want to grow. 366 00:20:00,731 --> 00:20:02,844 Lorelai Gilmore, the scandal girl. 367 00:20:03,021 --> 00:20:05,578 Now, tell me, what ever happened with Christopher? 368 00:20:05,770 --> 00:20:08,757 -Christopher is in California. -Do you hear from him? 369 00:20:09,102 --> 00:20:11,329 I'm sorry, is this painful for you to talk about? 370 00:20:11,517 --> 00:20:13,153 When did he last call you? 371 00:20:13,308 --> 00:20:15,296 You're making progress with that rude thing. 372 00:20:15,474 --> 00:20:17,666 -Sorry. -It's okay. 373 00:20:18,015 --> 00:20:20,651 He calls, like, once a week. And we see him at Christmas... 374 00:20:20,847 --> 00:20:23,154 sometimes Easter. It's all very civil. 375 00:20:23,345 --> 00:20:26,538 -So are you married now? -No, it's just me and Rory. 376 00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:29,475 -Your cat? -My kid. She's right over there. 377 00:20:32,758 --> 00:20:34,951 You can really see Christopher in her, can't you? 378 00:20:35,132 --> 00:20:37,325 -Yes, you can. -Does that kill you? 379 00:20:37,506 --> 00:20:41,812 You know what? I see someone else, and it's been great. 380 00:20:42,753 --> 00:20:45,946 -No, those aren't the terms we agreed on. -They most certainly are. 381 00:20:46,836 --> 00:20:48,744 You were at the same meeting as I was. 382 00:20:48,918 --> 00:20:51,792 We spelled out a five-year extension, not a three-year one. 383 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:53,114 I heard three. 384 00:20:53,249 --> 00:20:55,396 -Hey, Grandpa. -Rory. 385 00:20:55,581 --> 00:20:57,888 Gentlemen, this is my granddaughter, Rory. 386 00:20:58,080 --> 00:20:59,796 Happy birthday, Rory. 387 00:21:00,246 --> 00:21:02,439 I think we should get Dennis on the phone right now. 388 00:21:02,620 --> 00:21:05,005 Fine, I've got a phone in my office. 389 00:21:09,742 --> 00:21:12,651 Rory, there's a group of your school friends in the library. 390 00:21:12,865 --> 00:21:14,422 Let's go say hello to them. 391 00:21:21,612 --> 00:21:22,884 I have to go to the bathroom. 392 00:21:23,028 --> 00:21:26,300 Just say hello first. Come on, I'll hold those for you. 393 00:21:28,067 --> 00:21:30,499 -Who's that? -I think it's her party. 394 00:21:36,855 --> 00:21:37,923 Paris? 395 00:21:38,980 --> 00:21:41,014 -My parents made me come. -Oh, God! 396 00:21:41,187 --> 00:21:43,221 Otherwise I wouldn't be here. 397 00:21:43,477 --> 00:21:45,431 You believe me, don't you? 398 00:21:46,184 --> 00:21:48,014 Oh, coming to greet me? 399 00:21:48,891 --> 00:21:50,368 Hello, Tristin. 400 00:21:50,516 --> 00:21:53,391 -So where's my birthday kiss? -It's my birthday. 401 00:21:53,598 --> 00:21:56,313 -So I'll give you a birthday kiss. -What is wrong with you? 402 00:21:56,514 --> 00:21:58,343 Okay, I gotta tell you something. 403 00:21:58,513 --> 00:22:01,149 -I'm madly in love with you. -Well, good luck with that. 404 00:22:01,345 --> 00:22:03,094 I can't eat, I can't sleep. 405 00:22:03,261 --> 00:22:07,214 I wake up in the middle of the night calling out your name. Rory. 406 00:22:07,467 --> 00:22:08,864 Would you shut up please? 407 00:22:09,008 --> 00:22:11,234 Rory, who's your friend? 408 00:22:11,590 --> 00:22:14,226 -I don't know, but this is Tristin. -Excuse me? 409 00:22:14,422 --> 00:22:16,649 -Tristin Dugray, sir. -Dugray? 410 00:22:17,213 --> 00:22:20,599 -Are you any relation to Janlen Dugray? -That's my grandfather, sir. 411 00:22:20,837 --> 00:22:23,268 I've done business with Janlen for years. 412 00:22:23,460 --> 00:22:25,209 -He's a fine man. -That he is. 413 00:22:25,376 --> 00:22:28,125 You have very good taste in friends. I approve. 414 00:22:28,333 --> 00:22:32,286 Richard, I've got Dennis on the phone and he heard the same thing I heard. 415 00:22:32,540 --> 00:22:35,494 Well, one wrong man can always find a friend. 416 00:22:36,287 --> 00:22:38,003 -He likes me. -He's drunk. 417 00:22:38,162 --> 00:22:39,514 Let's take a walk. 418 00:22:39,662 --> 00:22:41,808 This is stupid. You don't even like me. 419 00:22:41,993 --> 00:22:44,584 You have this weird need to prove that I'll go out with you. 420 00:22:44,784 --> 00:22:46,056 That's not liking someone. 421 00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:49,154 Why are you fighting this? You're gonna give in eventually. 422 00:22:49,366 --> 00:22:50,843 I'm gonna go find my mother. 423 00:22:50,989 --> 00:22:52,739 Wow, meeting your mom. 424 00:22:53,114 --> 00:22:55,671 It's a bit sudden, but okay, I'm ready. 425 00:23:01,693 --> 00:23:02,965 There you are. 426 00:23:03,110 --> 00:23:05,495 I think it's time that you said a few words to your guests. 427 00:23:05,691 --> 00:23:07,725 -What? -Just a little speech to say thank you... 428 00:23:07,899 --> 00:23:10,012 and tell everyone how it feels to be one year older. 429 00:23:10,190 --> 00:23:12,098 -I don't think... -She's the hostess. 430 00:23:12,272 --> 00:23:15,101 -This is her responsibility. -I am not the hostess. You are. 431 00:23:15,312 --> 00:23:16,346 Honey, hold on. 432 00:23:16,479 --> 00:23:18,513 This is your party, and these are your guests. 433 00:23:18,686 --> 00:23:22,594 I don't have anything to say to them. So you give the speech. Excuse me. 434 00:23:25,058 --> 00:23:26,615 What was that all about? 435 00:23:26,766 --> 00:23:29,039 Lorelai, your daughter has no manners whatsoever. 436 00:23:29,223 --> 00:23:30,973 You should be ashamed of yourself. 437 00:23:33,055 --> 00:23:34,691 How did this become my fault? 438 00:23:48,465 --> 00:23:50,692 -Can I come in? -It's your room. 439 00:23:50,963 --> 00:23:52,554 How are you doing? 440 00:23:54,587 --> 00:23:56,655 I'm sorry I snapped at Grandma. 441 00:23:56,836 --> 00:24:00,222 That was a pretty Freaky Friday moment we had back there. 442 00:24:00,959 --> 00:24:03,834 She just went ahead and invited all those kids from Chilton. 443 00:24:04,041 --> 00:24:06,678 You're kidding. I thought she checked on that with you. 444 00:24:06,873 --> 00:24:10,463 -She didn't ask me or tell me. -Oh, man, I'm so sorry. 445 00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:12,308 I just... 446 00:24:12,537 --> 00:24:14,525 I don't know, but it really made me mad. 447 00:24:15,161 --> 00:24:18,548 -Honey, why didn't you tell me? -Because you were happy. 448 00:24:19,993 --> 00:24:22,265 It's not very often that there's peace between you two. 449 00:24:22,450 --> 00:24:23,961 I didn't want to screw everything up. 450 00:24:24,116 --> 00:24:26,229 I appreciate you wanting Mom and I to get along... 451 00:24:26,406 --> 00:24:28,156 but you shouldn't keep such stuff from me. 452 00:24:28,323 --> 00:24:31,709 I feel terrible. I mean, I've never yelled at her before. 453 00:24:32,321 --> 00:24:35,309 Listen, you'll apologize. All will be forgotten. 454 00:24:36,110 --> 00:24:37,383 You'll see. 455 00:24:42,900 --> 00:24:45,695 It's like time has stood still in this room. 456 00:24:46,231 --> 00:24:48,219 It must be weird for you to be in this room now. 457 00:24:48,397 --> 00:24:51,192 It was weird for me to be in this room then. 458 00:24:52,770 --> 00:24:55,804 You know, they gave this to me with the glass on. 459 00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:59,355 I now officially know what it feels like to have grown up here. 460 00:24:59,559 --> 00:25:03,104 It's not official until you're huddled in a corner, eating your hair. 461 00:25:04,806 --> 00:25:07,033 Do you remember your last birthday here? 462 00:25:08,138 --> 00:25:12,047 We had just had a fight, and I was lying on the bed just like you are now. 463 00:25:12,303 --> 00:25:13,894 What did you fight about? 464 00:25:16,718 --> 00:25:19,354 -I was pregnant. -That. 465 00:25:21,050 --> 00:25:24,561 And I said something at the table about the pâté smelling like Clorox... 466 00:25:24,797 --> 00:25:27,831 and one thing led to another, and I wound up here. 467 00:25:28,755 --> 00:25:32,947 They hadn't told anybody yet about me and you. 468 00:25:34,668 --> 00:25:37,656 -That must have been really hard on them. -Yeah. 469 00:25:38,626 --> 00:25:40,818 I remember when I finally told them... 470 00:25:40,999 --> 00:25:44,033 it was the only time they ever looked small to me. 471 00:25:46,455 --> 00:25:49,489 -I guess I'd better go find Grandma. -Give her a minute... 472 00:25:50,329 --> 00:25:52,363 -There you are. -She'll find us. 473 00:25:52,536 --> 00:25:56,126 You are both being very rude. This isn't my birthday party, you know. 474 00:25:56,367 --> 00:25:58,957 -Sorry, Mom. -Honestly, the way the two of you act. 475 00:25:59,158 --> 00:26:02,272 -Grandma, I just want to say... -We'll talk about this later. Now go. 476 00:26:08,446 --> 00:26:09,878 EMILY: Thank you. Good to see you. 477 00:26:10,029 --> 00:26:11,699 Lovely as always, Leeza. 478 00:26:13,277 --> 00:26:14,868 My best to Darren. 479 00:26:21,231 --> 00:26:22,300 Hey, Mom. 480 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:24,189 Great party. One of your best. 481 00:26:24,355 --> 00:26:27,104 I even liked those brown mushroom things. 482 00:26:27,438 --> 00:26:29,426 Grandma, can I talk to you for a sec? 483 00:26:29,603 --> 00:26:31,194 Richard, the girls are leaving. 484 00:26:33,351 --> 00:26:36,657 -Rory, I hope you had a good time. -Yeah, I did. 485 00:26:36,975 --> 00:26:39,724 I know your grandmother has already bought you a gift... 486 00:26:39,932 --> 00:26:41,250 and signed my name to it. 487 00:26:41,390 --> 00:26:43,821 That was part of our agreement when we got married. 488 00:26:44,014 --> 00:26:48,444 However, I feel this occasion calls for something a little extra. 489 00:26:48,761 --> 00:26:51,034 Put that towards your trip to Fez. 490 00:26:51,469 --> 00:26:55,014 -Oh, Grandpa. -You're a good girl, Rory. Happy birthday. 491 00:26:57,466 --> 00:27:00,659 -I don't deserve this. -Fine. Hand it over. 492 00:27:01,089 --> 00:27:03,409 You girls should get going. You've got quite a drive ahead. 493 00:27:03,547 --> 00:27:06,500 Grandma, we're having a party tomorrow at our house. 494 00:27:06,712 --> 00:27:08,905 It won't be anything like this... 495 00:27:09,170 --> 00:27:11,521 but it will be fun. Maybe you and Grandpa could come. 496 00:27:11,710 --> 00:27:14,380 That's very sweet, but I'm afraid we already have plans. 497 00:27:14,584 --> 00:27:16,969 -Okay. -Have a safe trip. 498 00:27:17,499 --> 00:27:19,407 Lock the door behind you. 499 00:27:22,747 --> 00:27:26,735 Why don't you go help that guy out there put all the presents in the car? 500 00:27:30,368 --> 00:27:32,481 All this can go in the dishwasher. 501 00:27:32,659 --> 00:27:35,965 -Mom, come to the party tomorrow. -I can't. I'm busy. 502 00:27:36,449 --> 00:27:38,245 Throw those out. We won't eat them. 503 00:27:38,823 --> 00:27:42,448 Your granddaughter invited you to her birthday party. Please come. 504 00:27:42,697 --> 00:27:45,003 I've already been to a party for my granddaughter... 505 00:27:45,195 --> 00:27:47,308 and she humiliated me in front of all my friends. 506 00:27:47,486 --> 00:27:49,837 I have no desire to relive that experience. 507 00:27:50,027 --> 00:27:52,300 The cheeses must be put in individual bags, please. 508 00:27:52,483 --> 00:27:53,756 Mom, come on. Give her a break. 509 00:27:53,899 --> 00:27:56,331 You invited all these Chilton kids without even asking her. 510 00:27:56,524 --> 00:27:59,160 They're her schoolmates. I assumed they were her friends. 511 00:27:59,356 --> 00:28:01,548 You know what they say when people assume things. 512 00:28:01,730 --> 00:28:02,764 No, what do they say? 513 00:28:02,896 --> 00:28:05,929 -That you shouldn't. -Very clever. 514 00:28:06,270 --> 00:28:08,985 Mom, she didn't want them here. She doesn't like them. 515 00:28:09,184 --> 00:28:10,378 I had to invite them. 516 00:28:10,518 --> 00:28:13,313 That's just good manners, something your daughter is sorely lacking. 517 00:28:13,516 --> 00:28:16,425 You're doing the same thing to her that you always did to me. 518 00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:19,627 You try to control her. When that doesn't work you shut her out. 519 00:28:19,847 --> 00:28:21,801 I'm too tired for your accusations right now. 520 00:28:21,971 --> 00:28:24,244 Can we do this tomorrow? I'll find you a pen... 521 00:28:24,429 --> 00:28:27,065 so you can write down your insults so that you won't forget them. 522 00:28:27,261 --> 00:28:30,453 This is not funny. I have a crushed kid out in the car. 523 00:28:30,676 --> 00:28:31,823 What do you want me to say? 524 00:28:31,967 --> 00:28:34,796 Everything's fine. It's forgotten. There. I'll see you next week. 525 00:28:35,007 --> 00:28:38,552 So I guess the whole pudding thing was just a fluke, huh? 526 00:28:38,880 --> 00:28:41,073 Trying to get to know us, easing up on the rules... 527 00:28:41,254 --> 00:28:44,719 smudging that bottom line of yours. It was just some weird phase. 528 00:28:44,961 --> 00:28:47,029 You were on cold medicine last week or something? 529 00:28:47,210 --> 00:28:50,675 Oh, so I'm a villain now, is that it? I spent a fortune on this party. 530 00:28:50,917 --> 00:28:54,143 I spent days planning it, making sure that every little detail was perfect... 531 00:28:54,374 --> 00:28:56,805 the food, the linen, the music. I did all this for Rory. 532 00:28:56,998 --> 00:28:58,191 That's not what she needed. 533 00:28:58,330 --> 00:29:00,523 What she needs is for you to accept her apology... 534 00:29:00,705 --> 00:29:02,693 and come to her party. That's what she needs. 535 00:29:02,869 --> 00:29:04,778 -You don't care what she needs. -How dare you? 536 00:29:04,952 --> 00:29:07,338 You don't know what she needs 'cause you don't know her. 537 00:29:07,535 --> 00:29:09,895 You've never tried to know her, just like you never knew me. 538 00:29:10,075 --> 00:29:12,029 -I know you. -You don't know anything about me. 539 00:29:12,199 --> 00:29:15,313 You'd like to think that, wouldn't you? That you're some huge mystery to me? 540 00:29:15,531 --> 00:29:16,611 "Why does Lorelai do that?" 541 00:29:16,698 --> 00:29:18,254 "I don't know. She's a mystery to me." 542 00:29:18,405 --> 00:29:21,314 -You're not so mysterious, Lorelai. -No. What am I then? 543 00:29:21,529 --> 00:29:24,676 Right now you're very loud and disruptive to the entire cleaning process. 544 00:29:24,902 --> 00:29:28,413 What do I have to do to get you to put the damn cheese in individual bags? 545 00:29:28,650 --> 00:29:29,764 Fine. I give up. 546 00:29:29,900 --> 00:29:32,285 You give up? If I had a dollar for every time you gave up... 547 00:29:32,482 --> 00:29:34,709 Then you could pay for this party, couldn't you? 548 00:29:44,185 --> 00:29:45,298 I made coffee. 549 00:29:46,767 --> 00:29:47,961 Hangover? 550 00:29:48,267 --> 00:29:51,335 -Emily. -Got it. Moving on. 551 00:29:54,347 --> 00:29:56,097 -Good morning. -Morning, popcorn. 552 00:29:56,264 --> 00:29:58,695 -You want some pancakes? -No, I've gotta get going. 553 00:29:58,887 --> 00:30:01,000 -Where? -The college fair is today. 554 00:30:01,178 --> 00:30:03,166 So you're going to get another Harvard brochure? 555 00:30:03,344 --> 00:30:05,457 I just wanna see if they've changed the pictures. 556 00:30:05,634 --> 00:30:06,668 Weirdo. 557 00:30:06,801 --> 00:30:08,948 I'll be back in plenty of time to help you decorate. 558 00:30:09,132 --> 00:30:10,723 This is your party. You do not work. 559 00:30:10,882 --> 00:30:13,392 You lounge and mock those who are. Have I taught you nothing? 560 00:30:13,589 --> 00:30:16,940 -Sorry. I'll try to be better. Bye. -Okay, bye-bye. 561 00:30:25,917 --> 00:30:27,553 -New brochure? -Yes. 562 00:30:32,914 --> 00:30:35,948 -What are you doing here? -There's a college fair going on. 563 00:30:36,162 --> 00:30:40,434 -No. I mean what are you doing here? -I'm getting a new brochure. 564 00:30:40,702 --> 00:30:43,212 -Why? -Because they're not selling pizza. 565 00:30:45,742 --> 00:30:47,537 -Oh, no. -You can't. 566 00:30:48,074 --> 00:30:49,790 -You're applying to Harvard? -Yes. 567 00:30:50,740 --> 00:30:52,966 Ten generations of Gellers have gone to Harvard. 568 00:30:53,155 --> 00:30:54,587 I have to go to Harvard. 569 00:30:54,738 --> 00:30:57,123 -I can't believe this. -You can go somewhere else. 570 00:30:57,320 --> 00:30:59,752 Go to Brandeis. Brandeis is nice. 571 00:30:59,944 --> 00:31:02,410 I've only ever wanted to go to Harvard. 572 00:31:02,776 --> 00:31:04,606 That's it. Nowhere else. 573 00:31:09,065 --> 00:31:11,497 -It's a big school. -I guess. 574 00:31:12,106 --> 00:31:14,742 -We'll probably never see each other. -You think? 575 00:31:15,105 --> 00:31:17,490 -If we do, we duck. -Okay. 576 00:31:29,473 --> 00:31:33,381 -Are you dating Tristin? -What? No way. 577 00:31:35,762 --> 00:31:38,432 -Do you like him? -Not even a little. 578 00:31:39,386 --> 00:31:40,976 -Really? -Really. 579 00:31:41,551 --> 00:31:42,584 Okay. 580 00:31:51,089 --> 00:31:54,043 -Nice party. -Thanks. 581 00:32:01,626 --> 00:32:03,932 [LOUD UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING] 582 00:32:09,331 --> 00:32:11,921 Hi, everybody. Happy birthday, Rory. 583 00:32:12,121 --> 00:32:13,439 Oh, my God. 584 00:32:18,534 --> 00:32:20,443 Open it. 585 00:32:21,867 --> 00:32:23,821 -No! -Do you like it? 586 00:32:25,740 --> 00:32:27,570 -You can take it back. -No, I love it. 587 00:32:27,739 --> 00:32:30,171 -It's perfect. -It's blue, and it has a handle. 588 00:32:30,363 --> 00:32:32,432 -It's way too expensive. -I know. 589 00:32:32,612 --> 00:32:36,964 -That's what I told the guy at the store. -On three, 'cause I'm gonna drop it. 590 00:32:37,235 --> 00:32:38,667 One, two... 591 00:32:39,068 --> 00:32:40,897 [ALL SINGING HAPPY BIRTHDAY] 592 00:32:54,227 --> 00:32:55,545 Make a wish. 593 00:33:03,474 --> 00:33:06,860 All right, everybody, I need your attention. Attention, please. 594 00:33:07,639 --> 00:33:09,388 This is a very serious moment. 595 00:33:12,095 --> 00:33:14,321 Two priests, a rabbi, and a duck... 596 00:33:14,761 --> 00:33:16,795 -Mom. -All right, I'm kidding. 597 00:33:18,176 --> 00:33:20,483 I would like to propose a toast... 598 00:33:20,674 --> 00:33:23,708 to the one thing in my life that is always good... 599 00:33:24,215 --> 00:33:25,692 always sweet... 600 00:33:25,923 --> 00:33:29,513 and without whom I would have no reason to get up in the morning. 601 00:33:30,087 --> 00:33:31,916 My pal Rory. Cheers. 602 00:33:33,169 --> 00:33:34,965 Here's to you, birthday girl. 603 00:33:35,127 --> 00:33:37,161 And in honor of this very special girl... 604 00:33:37,334 --> 00:33:39,607 I now invite you all to help me eat her face. 605 00:33:40,499 --> 00:33:42,453 And you may have the first cut. 606 00:33:43,081 --> 00:33:45,956 There's something very strange about hacking into my own head. 607 00:33:46,164 --> 00:33:50,072 Jeez, who the hell's ringing the bell? It's a party. Get your ass in here. 608 00:33:52,411 --> 00:33:55,047 Or asses, I guess. 609 00:34:02,531 --> 00:34:04,247 Grandma, Grandpa... 610 00:34:04,780 --> 00:34:08,086 I can't believe you're here. I'm so glad you came. 611 00:34:08,862 --> 00:34:11,816 -Hey, no tie? -I thought I'd mix it up a little. 612 00:34:12,068 --> 00:34:15,022 -Grandma, look. -Why, it looks lovely. 613 00:34:15,359 --> 00:34:18,585 I want you to meet everyone. Everyone, these are my grandparents. 614 00:34:20,690 --> 00:34:22,803 -Lorelai. -Emily, Dad... 615 00:34:22,981 --> 00:34:24,776 Lorelai, you look well. 616 00:34:24,980 --> 00:34:26,377 I'm Patricia Lacosta. 617 00:34:26,521 --> 00:34:28,793 We just love your daughter and granddaughter. 618 00:34:28,978 --> 00:34:30,171 Thank you. 619 00:34:30,311 --> 00:34:32,868 My God, you're a tall specimen of a man. 620 00:34:33,185 --> 00:34:35,298 Must be all that good air in Hartford. 621 00:34:36,225 --> 00:34:38,531 Mom, Dad, can I get you a drink? 622 00:34:38,724 --> 00:34:40,520 -No, thank you. -You're gonna need one. 623 00:34:40,681 --> 00:34:43,476 I have wine glasses that say "Holiday Inn" on them. 624 00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:46,475 -Stoli on the rocks with a twist. -Right. 625 00:34:49,553 --> 00:34:51,666 -My parents are here. -No. 626 00:34:53,135 --> 00:34:56,407 I've cursed in front of them twice, Miss Patty tried to hit on my dad... 627 00:34:56,632 --> 00:34:59,064 and I'm sure Mom's gonna call Child Protective Services. 628 00:34:59,257 --> 00:35:02,132 -When was the last time they were here? -Never. 629 00:35:02,422 --> 00:35:04,808 -Not once? -Not since we moved here. 630 00:35:05,004 --> 00:35:08,038 They'd come down and visit us occasionally when Rory was a baby... 631 00:35:08,253 --> 00:35:11,559 and we lived at the Inn, but they have never been here. 632 00:35:12,501 --> 00:35:14,250 That's big stuff. Is Rory thrilled? 633 00:35:14,417 --> 00:35:16,246 -Through the roof. -Oh, that's great. 634 00:35:16,708 --> 00:35:19,457 Lorelai, I just tried some of those hors d'oeuvres. 635 00:35:19,664 --> 00:35:20,778 They're unbelievable. 636 00:35:20,914 --> 00:35:22,663 -Who is your caterer? -Sookie. 637 00:35:22,830 --> 00:35:24,545 -What's a Sookie? -That's a Sookie. 638 00:35:24,704 --> 00:35:27,738 -Hi, Sookie St. James. -Sookie's the chef at the Inn, Mom. 639 00:35:27,953 --> 00:35:31,020 -My dear, you are very talented. -Thank you. 640 00:35:31,410 --> 00:35:34,284 You must cater my next party. When my friends get wind of you... 641 00:35:34,491 --> 00:35:37,286 you'll have so much business, you won't know what to do with yourself. 642 00:35:37,490 --> 00:35:39,239 But remember, I discovered you. 643 00:35:39,406 --> 00:35:42,632 Mom, Sookie has a job. She's the chef at the Inn. 644 00:35:44,654 --> 00:35:47,562 The Inn where we work. 645 00:35:48,527 --> 00:35:49,527 My Inn. 646 00:35:49,651 --> 00:35:52,560 Six days a week, Mom. She cooks there every day. 647 00:35:52,775 --> 00:35:55,411 Just give her your number or we'll never get out of here. 648 00:36:00,105 --> 00:36:03,775 -So, how does it look? -It doesn't look structurally sound. 649 00:36:05,853 --> 00:36:07,285 Drink up, Dad. 650 00:36:10,393 --> 00:36:11,586 Okay, don't panic. 651 00:36:11,726 --> 00:36:13,998 -Good opening line. What's wrong? -We're out of ice. 652 00:36:14,182 --> 00:36:15,330 How can we be out of ice? 653 00:36:15,473 --> 00:36:17,833 We had a ton of ice. It was like a penguin habitat in there. 654 00:36:17,931 --> 00:36:19,091 I don't know how it happened. 655 00:36:19,180 --> 00:36:22,009 I just know it happened. Somehow we have to deal with it. 656 00:36:22,221 --> 00:36:24,255 I will go and get some then. 657 00:36:31,092 --> 00:36:33,921 Oh, my God. You're a vision! 658 00:36:34,173 --> 00:36:37,082 -Sookie, we have ice. -Hallelujah. 659 00:36:37,548 --> 00:36:38,741 How did you know? 660 00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:41,550 A good rule of thumb is you can never have too much ice. 661 00:36:42,045 --> 00:36:43,602 You're the best! 662 00:36:46,835 --> 00:36:49,301 Hi, Mom. This is my friend Luke. 663 00:36:49,500 --> 00:36:51,807 -How do you do? -Fine, thank you. 664 00:36:52,541 --> 00:36:54,814 I'd better get these in the freezer before they melt. 665 00:36:54,999 --> 00:36:56,873 Not very likely in here. 666 00:37:07,243 --> 00:37:10,913 -Rory, what a lovely party. -I brought you something to read. 667 00:37:11,616 --> 00:37:13,013 It's not The Wall Street Journal. 668 00:37:13,156 --> 00:37:16,383 But there's a quiz there that determines if you're a summer or a fall. 669 00:37:16,614 --> 00:37:18,682 I appreciate this. Thank you. 670 00:37:24,985 --> 00:37:27,894 Morey, you remember the time that Rory decided... 671 00:37:28,109 --> 00:37:31,063 that our old tree stump was a fairy ring? 672 00:37:31,274 --> 00:37:33,831 -I sure do. -How old was she then, sugar? 673 00:37:34,064 --> 00:37:35,212 I think she was about 10. 674 00:37:35,356 --> 00:37:37,548 All I know is that it matched the description. 675 00:37:37,729 --> 00:37:39,445 Oh, God, she was cute. 676 00:37:39,604 --> 00:37:42,274 She used to sit out there with a peanut-butter sandwich... 677 00:37:42,477 --> 00:37:44,784 just waiting for the fairy to get hungry. 678 00:37:45,060 --> 00:37:46,650 Okay. New story. 679 00:37:46,892 --> 00:37:51,039 I'm still crushed beyond belief that she quit her ballet lessons. 680 00:37:51,349 --> 00:37:52,746 Oh, not me. 681 00:37:52,889 --> 00:37:56,957 Miss Perfect Work Ethic would prance around this room 24 hours a day. 682 00:37:57,221 --> 00:37:59,289 -And I still stunk. -I can vouch for that. 683 00:37:59,470 --> 00:38:02,299 -That's not true. -She was pretty bad. 684 00:38:02,635 --> 00:38:06,385 Don't you listen to them. You had a true gift. 685 00:38:08,591 --> 00:38:09,659 What? 686 00:38:10,924 --> 00:38:13,639 She did. She was talented. 687 00:38:13,839 --> 00:38:16,430 [WHAT A WONDERFUL WORLD BY LOUIS ARMSTRONG PLAYING] 688 00:38:22,460 --> 00:38:23,812 I made that. 689 00:38:24,626 --> 00:38:27,375 -Really? -From Rory's old baby clothes. 690 00:38:28,374 --> 00:38:30,965 How nice. I hope you washed them first. 691 00:38:31,373 --> 00:38:33,281 Oh, rats. I knew I forgot something. 692 00:38:36,204 --> 00:38:39,158 That's quite an assortment of characters you have assembled down there. 693 00:38:39,370 --> 00:38:40,802 They're great people. 694 00:38:40,952 --> 00:38:42,827 -This Patricia. -Miss Patty. 695 00:38:43,076 --> 00:38:45,428 -She teaches dance? -Among other things. 696 00:38:46,950 --> 00:38:49,097 -This man with the ice... -Luke. 697 00:38:49,657 --> 00:38:51,134 How long have you been seeing him? 698 00:38:51,281 --> 00:38:54,030 I'm not seeing Luke. He's just a friend. 699 00:38:55,612 --> 00:38:59,237 Mom, I swear. Luke keeps me in coffee. Nothing else. 700 00:38:59,777 --> 00:39:01,129 He seems to like you. 701 00:39:01,276 --> 00:39:04,230 -And you're judging this by what? -By the way he looked at you. 702 00:39:04,442 --> 00:39:05,555 Which was how? 703 00:39:05,691 --> 00:39:07,884 Like you were about to give him a lap dance. 704 00:39:09,148 --> 00:39:11,738 -Mom, he did not look at me like that. -You're pleased. 705 00:39:11,939 --> 00:39:13,575 -What? -You smiled. 706 00:39:13,729 --> 00:39:16,797 You're pleased that the ice man looked at you like a porterhouse steak. 707 00:39:17,020 --> 00:39:18,928 I'm smiling because you're crazy... 708 00:39:19,103 --> 00:39:22,216 and that's what you do to crazy people to keep them calm. 709 00:39:29,473 --> 00:39:32,540 -What's this? -That's me, Mom. 710 00:39:33,013 --> 00:39:35,523 I know it's you. You're wearing a cast. 711 00:39:35,720 --> 00:39:37,947 Yeah. That's when I broke my leg. 712 00:39:38,594 --> 00:39:39,792 You broke your leg? 713 00:39:39,816 --> 00:39:42,377 Yeah, three years ago during a yoga class. 714 00:39:42,676 --> 00:39:45,391 The headstand portion took a very ugly turn. 715 00:39:45,715 --> 00:39:49,783 The good thing was that I brought the smug, blonde, pretzel chick down with me. 716 00:39:50,047 --> 00:39:53,035 I've since learned that I'm a bit too competitive for yoga. 717 00:39:53,254 --> 00:39:56,765 -I never knew you broke your leg. -It was no big deal, Mom. 718 00:39:57,378 --> 00:39:59,650 If I had been really sick you would have known. 719 00:40:06,748 --> 00:40:09,896 You could get a maid in here once a week to at least tidy up. 720 00:40:10,121 --> 00:40:12,268 -I like it cluttered. -You can't even find the bed. 721 00:40:12,454 --> 00:40:15,442 Yes, I can. It's the thing I crash into on the way to the closet. 722 00:40:17,868 --> 00:40:19,664 I should go check on your father. 723 00:40:20,533 --> 00:40:23,249 It was nice that you came tonight, Mom. 724 00:40:24,115 --> 00:40:27,546 It meant a lot to Rory. Really. 725 00:40:27,989 --> 00:40:30,374 She is my granddaughter, after all. 726 00:40:30,696 --> 00:40:33,081 -I should be here. -I totally agree. 727 00:40:36,818 --> 00:40:38,215 Leave it, Mom. 728 00:40:48,772 --> 00:40:51,521 -It's time to go now. -In a minute, please. 729 00:40:53,436 --> 00:40:56,981 -Rory, we're going to get going now. -Thank you for coming. 730 00:40:57,227 --> 00:40:58,976 Thank you for asking me. 731 00:41:00,974 --> 00:41:02,043 Lovely party. 732 00:41:03,349 --> 00:41:05,178 I enjoyed the reading material immensely. 733 00:41:05,348 --> 00:41:09,177 -So what's the verdict? -I am an autumn. 734 00:41:09,763 --> 00:41:11,592 -Interesting. -Isn't it? 735 00:41:12,678 --> 00:41:15,904 So are you guys leaving? The mud wrestling starts in 10 minutes. 736 00:41:16,135 --> 00:41:18,771 Good night, Lorelai. We had a lovely time. 737 00:41:19,634 --> 00:41:22,099 And with a straight face you said that. 738 00:41:23,381 --> 00:41:25,608 I'd have that chimney inspected if I were you. 739 00:41:25,797 --> 00:41:27,512 I'll get right on that, Dad. 740 00:41:28,087 --> 00:41:31,075 -For Fez. -But you already took care of Fez. 741 00:41:31,378 --> 00:41:33,286 Fez is a very large city. 742 00:41:44,872 --> 00:41:46,747 -Food fight? -Absolutely. 743 00:41:59,866 --> 00:42:02,661 She's right. I don't know my daughter at all. 744 00:42:08,404 --> 00:42:10,438 We should go. Traffic. 745 00:42:15,067 --> 00:42:19,134 Next year we are going to a McDonald's with one of those slides, and that's it. 746 00:42:19,399 --> 00:42:20,910 The party was a hit. 747 00:42:21,064 --> 00:42:23,416 And we'll be eating onion dip for breakfast for a week. 748 00:42:23,606 --> 00:42:27,196 You mix that dip with ground turkey and garlic, and it is really not too bad. 749 00:42:27,437 --> 00:42:29,948 -I'm not looking for a recipe. -Reflex. Sorry. 750 00:42:30,144 --> 00:42:32,735 -I'm gonna go check the living room. -Okay. 751 00:42:37,849 --> 00:42:39,281 You didn't have to get me anything. 752 00:42:39,432 --> 00:42:41,897 Sorry. That's the rules. You get older, you get a gift. 753 00:42:42,097 --> 00:42:44,687 I'm sorry about this sort of sneaky thing. 754 00:42:44,888 --> 00:42:47,683 I just haven't told my mother yet about you. 755 00:42:47,887 --> 00:42:52,159 -Not that there's anything to tell. -It's okay. This is better. 756 00:42:59,631 --> 00:43:02,585 Oh, my God. It's beautiful. 757 00:43:03,880 --> 00:43:06,914 I bought the medallion, and then I just cut some leather straps... 758 00:43:07,128 --> 00:43:09,923 and drilled a hole and, well... 759 00:43:11,959 --> 00:43:13,187 Do you like it? 760 00:43:15,292 --> 00:43:16,962 -It's amazing. -Good. 761 00:43:18,415 --> 00:43:20,323 -Thank you. -Here.