1 00:00:00,354 --> 00:00:01,479 ♪ Born on the wrong end Of the leash ♪ 2 00:00:01,563 --> 00:00:04,271 -♪ He was a dreamer ♪ -♪ And a little schemer ♪ 3 00:00:04,354 --> 00:00:05,646 ♪ A nutty mutt living a dog's life ♪ 4 00:00:05,730 --> 00:00:07,438 ♪ But when he'd hear the bell for school ♪ 5 00:00:07,521 --> 00:00:08,354 ♪ He'd start to drool ♪ 6 00:00:08,438 --> 00:00:10,146 -♪ One day he says ♪ -♪ I'll take a chance ♪ 7 00:00:10,229 --> 00:00:11,730 ♪ Trades his leash For a pair of pants ♪ 8 00:00:11,813 --> 00:00:14,146 ♪ In a glance, school becomes His favorite pastime ♪ 9 00:00:14,229 --> 00:00:16,563 ♪ I have buried a bone For the last time ♪ 10 00:00:16,646 --> 00:00:18,312 -♪ He says ♪ -♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 11 00:00:18,396 --> 00:00:19,646 ♪ Ooh, he's bad ♪ 12 00:00:19,730 --> 00:00:21,187 ♪ He's so over just being rover ♪ 13 00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:22,604 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 14 00:00:22,688 --> 00:00:25,187 ♪ He says he's just gonna be a boy ♪ 15 00:00:25,271 --> 00:00:26,688 ♪ Turns out he's a regular Einstein ♪ 16 00:00:26,771 --> 00:00:28,688 ♪ And Leonard is treading a fine line ♪ 17 00:00:28,771 --> 00:00:30,938 Why can't I be a normal kid like any other? 18 00:00:31,021 --> 00:00:33,438 Now, doodle bug, listen to mother. 19 00:00:33,521 --> 00:00:35,062 ♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 20 00:00:35,146 --> 00:00:36,730 I hate dogs. 21 00:00:36,813 --> 00:00:39,688 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 22 00:00:39,771 --> 00:00:41,438 ♪ This power pup's gonna be a boy ♪ 23 00:00:41,521 --> 00:00:43,438 I do not wish to be a dog. 24 00:00:43,521 --> 00:00:46,104 ♪ Now this bowser's ready for trousers ♪ 25 00:00:46,187 --> 00:00:47,479 ♪ I got to be a boy ♪ 26 00:00:47,563 --> 00:00:49,104 ♪ His nose is wet but you can bet ♪ 27 00:00:49,187 --> 00:00:52,229 ♪ This teacher's pet is gonna be a boy ♪ 28 00:00:52,312 --> 00:00:54,146 Yes! 29 00:01:10,062 --> 00:01:11,646 Good morning, students. 30 00:01:11,730 --> 00:01:14,479 I have an inordinately exciting announcement for you all today. 31 00:01:14,563 --> 00:01:16,813 Are they closing the school because of an asbestos scare? 32 00:01:16,896 --> 00:01:18,604 No, better than that. 33 00:01:18,688 --> 00:01:21,688 Today marks the beginning of the president of the senate's 34 00:01:21,771 --> 00:01:24,021 "National Reading is Good For You" month. 35 00:01:24,104 --> 00:01:25,688 [coughs] 36 00:01:25,771 --> 00:01:27,021 Now I know what you're thinking. 37 00:01:27,104 --> 00:01:29,271 Who wants to devote an entire month to reading? 38 00:01:29,354 --> 00:01:30,688 Who cares if our student body 39 00:01:30,771 --> 00:01:32,312 outperforms the rest of the state? 40 00:01:32,396 --> 00:01:35,021 I don't want our school to win new playground equipment. 41 00:01:35,104 --> 00:01:36,813 Playground equipment? 42 00:01:36,896 --> 00:01:38,521 You heard that right! 43 00:01:38,604 --> 00:01:41,062 The board of education has promised me 44 00:01:41,146 --> 00:01:44,146 that if you better the state average of 1,000 books read 45 00:01:44,229 --> 00:01:47,938 and 1,000 book reports written by the end of the month, 46 00:01:48,021 --> 00:01:51,855 we will get a new four-square court. 47 00:01:51,938 --> 00:01:53,938 [all] Yay! 48 00:01:54,021 --> 00:01:57,604 In fact, I'll bet you can read 1,500 books 49 00:01:57,688 --> 00:02:00,771 and get a new curvy sliding board 50 00:02:00,855 --> 00:02:05,187 with cut-in-half truck tires and chain-ladder thingy. 51 00:02:05,271 --> 00:02:06,521 [all] Yeah! 52 00:02:06,604 --> 00:02:07,938 [chanting] Read, read! 53 00:02:08,021 --> 00:02:13,104 I even bet you could read 2,000 books this month! 54 00:02:13,187 --> 00:02:14,896 [girl] No! No we can't! 55 00:02:14,980 --> 00:02:16,813 Yes, you can! I believe in you. 56 00:02:16,896 --> 00:02:18,312 And if we do this together, 57 00:02:18,438 --> 00:02:21,021 if the school reads and writes reports on 2,000 books-- 58 00:02:21,104 --> 00:02:24,062 What do we get then? A working roller coaster? 59 00:02:24,146 --> 00:02:26,271 No, I'm afraid the board of education 60 00:02:26,354 --> 00:02:28,896 can't budget anything over the tire-slide deal. 61 00:02:28,980 --> 00:02:30,980 [all] Aw, man! 62 00:02:31,062 --> 00:02:35,146 But just to show I'm in this with you, 63 00:02:35,229 --> 00:02:37,187 if you can do it, 64 00:02:37,271 --> 00:02:40,730 I-I will shave my very own head. 65 00:02:40,813 --> 00:02:42,312 Meow! 66 00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:44,146 [all] Yeah! 67 00:02:44,229 --> 00:02:47,980 And not only that, I will paint said bald head... 68 00:02:48,062 --> 00:02:49,312 Purple! 69 00:02:49,396 --> 00:02:50,730 [all] Yeah! 70 00:02:50,813 --> 00:02:53,104 [all chanting] Strickler, Strickler, Strickler! 71 00:02:53,187 --> 00:02:55,604 [thinking] Look at them, Cubby. They love you. 72 00:02:55,688 --> 00:02:59,271 Yep, you are some kind of great principal. 73 00:02:59,354 --> 00:03:01,980 Got a little carried away at the end there, but no harm. 74 00:03:02,062 --> 00:03:04,730 You won't have to shave your head and paint it purple. 75 00:03:04,813 --> 00:03:06,146 [Scott] Excuse me, sir! 76 00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:07,938 Yes? Who is that? 77 00:03:08,062 --> 00:03:10,771 Scott Leadready. 78 00:03:10,855 --> 00:03:13,688 Sir, I applaud you on your bold challenge. 79 00:03:13,771 --> 00:03:17,146 I will ensure your reading challenge is not only met, 80 00:03:17,229 --> 00:03:18,563 nay, but far surpassed. 81 00:03:18,646 --> 00:03:21,479 Even if I have to read every other book myself. 82 00:03:21,563 --> 00:03:22,938 [audience gasps] 83 00:03:23,021 --> 00:03:24,938 That's nice. 84 00:03:29,354 --> 00:03:32,312 That was some promise you made in front of the whole school. 85 00:03:32,396 --> 00:03:33,563 I was really impressed. 86 00:03:33,646 --> 00:03:35,062 I'm glad somebody was. 87 00:03:35,146 --> 00:03:37,396 Can you believe that ungrateful principal? 88 00:03:37,479 --> 00:03:40,146 I vow to make this school a champion, 89 00:03:40,229 --> 00:03:42,021 soaring to heights of hyperbole 90 00:03:42,104 --> 00:03:44,688 ridiculous even by my own standards, 91 00:03:44,771 --> 00:03:46,521 and I all I get is, "that's nice." 92 00:03:46,604 --> 00:03:49,438 Sometimes I think the man doesn't even know my name. 93 00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:51,146 Scott Leadready. Scott Leadready! 94 00:03:51,229 --> 00:03:52,980 How could I forget him? 95 00:03:53,062 --> 00:03:56,646 Scott Leadready will probably read 2,000 books on his own! 96 00:03:56,730 --> 00:03:59,396 Where does that kid get off being so smart? 97 00:04:00,563 --> 00:04:01,271 Aah! 98 00:04:01,354 --> 00:04:03,104 [yowls] 99 00:04:04,896 --> 00:04:06,771 Scott, how would you like to be 100 00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,855 my Special Junior-Deputy Vice-Principal 101 00:04:08,938 --> 00:04:12,354 in charge of reading and reporting motivational affairs? 102 00:04:12,438 --> 00:04:13,855 Me? 103 00:04:13,938 --> 00:04:16,646 I want you to stay close by my side throughout the month, 104 00:04:16,730 --> 00:04:19,312 keep the library functioning at tip-top speed, 105 00:04:19,396 --> 00:04:22,146 and tally the reading output of your fellow students. 106 00:04:22,229 --> 00:04:25,855 It's a very important and time-consuming position. 107 00:04:25,938 --> 00:04:27,354 Are you with me? 108 00:04:27,438 --> 00:04:30,521 Oh, sir, I'm overwhelmed. It's such an honor to -- 109 00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:33,896 do I get a special name badge for my shirt? 110 00:04:33,980 --> 00:04:35,479 Covered in plastic. 111 00:04:35,563 --> 00:04:37,271 Then the answer is yes! 112 00:04:37,354 --> 00:04:41,229 You and me together! All for one and one for all! 113 00:04:41,312 --> 00:04:45,521 Just like "The Three Musketeers" by Alexander Dumas Père. 114 00:04:45,604 --> 00:04:47,563 He's the author whose collected works 115 00:04:47,646 --> 00:04:49,563 I'm going to read and report on tonight. 116 00:04:49,646 --> 00:04:50,980 Good. 117 00:04:51,062 --> 00:04:52,479 Uh, you can read this later. 118 00:04:52,563 --> 00:04:54,521 Right now I've got some important forms 119 00:04:54,604 --> 00:04:56,438 I want you to fill out. 120 00:04:56,521 --> 00:04:57,604 Triplicate?! Pinch me! 121 00:04:57,688 --> 00:05:01,104 You won't regret giving me this job, sir. 122 00:05:01,187 --> 00:05:03,604 I know I won't. 123 00:05:03,688 --> 00:05:06,479 Fellow bibliophiles... 124 00:05:06,563 --> 00:05:10,187 I present to you the Fala D. Roosevelt Elementary 125 00:05:10,271 --> 00:05:14,438 reading and reporting challenge progress thermometer. 126 00:05:16,896 --> 00:05:19,354 "Why a thermometer?" You may ask. 127 00:05:19,438 --> 00:05:22,146 Because, my friends, reading is like a virus 128 00:05:22,229 --> 00:05:25,396 that infects you with the high fever of learning, 129 00:05:25,479 --> 00:05:28,021 accompanied by the cotton mouth of accomplishment 130 00:05:28,104 --> 00:05:30,104 and the occasional intestinal distress -- 131 00:05:30,187 --> 00:05:32,855 [burps] 132 00:05:34,229 --> 00:05:36,396 Well, let's get on with it, huh? 133 00:05:36,479 --> 00:05:39,354 Has everyone read and reported on their three books for today? 134 00:05:39,438 --> 00:05:40,521 [all] Yeah! 135 00:05:42,688 --> 00:05:44,479 [bell dings] 136 00:05:44,563 --> 00:05:46,312 [all] Yeah! Whoo! 137 00:05:46,396 --> 00:05:50,187 And, Scott, I'm sure you have at least six book reports. 138 00:05:50,271 --> 00:05:51,604 Uh, not quite. 139 00:05:51,688 --> 00:05:53,938 I was up all night building the thermometer. 140 00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:56,146 I only had time to read one book. 141 00:05:56,229 --> 00:05:58,479 "How to build a giant thermometer." 142 00:05:58,563 --> 00:06:01,479 Well, that's all right. I'm sure you'll read more. 143 00:06:01,563 --> 00:06:04,479 Don't forget-- we can't do it without you. 144 00:06:04,563 --> 00:06:06,396 And read and write I shall! 145 00:06:06,479 --> 00:06:07,730 [all] Yeah! 146 00:06:07,813 --> 00:06:10,688 Just as soon I read your reports 147 00:06:10,771 --> 00:06:14,396 and write my reports on your reports. 148 00:06:17,062 --> 00:06:20,479 Ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! 149 00:06:20,563 --> 00:06:22,688 [bell dinging] 150 00:06:27,312 --> 00:06:29,479 [whistling] 151 00:06:40,855 --> 00:06:42,646 [maniacal laughter] 152 00:06:43,730 --> 00:06:45,187 [bell dings] 153 00:07:00,312 --> 00:07:04,187 Here-- number 1,500! 154 00:07:04,271 --> 00:07:09,646 "My first little big lots-of-fun pop-up book"! 155 00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:12,771 We got a new sliding board! 156 00:07:12,855 --> 00:07:15,438 And a biohazard team. 157 00:07:15,521 --> 00:07:17,521 Congratulations, students. 158 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:19,021 And kudos to my protégé, 159 00:07:19,104 --> 00:07:21,896 Special Junior Vice-Principal Scott Leadready, 160 00:07:21,980 --> 00:07:23,521 for his exemplary work. 161 00:07:23,604 --> 00:07:24,604 Thank you. 162 00:07:24,688 --> 00:07:26,855 And now on to the next step. 163 00:07:26,938 --> 00:07:30,688 We have four days left to get to 2,000 books. 164 00:07:30,771 --> 00:07:32,563 Are we gonna do it? 165 00:07:32,646 --> 00:07:35,896 [all] Sure. I guess so. Yeah. 166 00:07:35,980 --> 00:07:38,688 Not as lusty as I'd like, but I'll take it. 167 00:07:38,771 --> 00:07:40,896 Keep up the good work, folks. 168 00:07:40,980 --> 00:07:42,688 [all] Whoo. Yeah. Yay. Whoo. 169 00:07:44,563 --> 00:07:47,855 [bell rings] 170 00:07:52,438 --> 00:07:54,104 Well, well, well. 171 00:07:54,187 --> 00:07:58,146 If it isn't junior-deputy snake-in-the-grass 172 00:07:58,229 --> 00:07:59,771 Scott Seadready. 173 00:07:59,855 --> 00:08:02,396 Hey, easy on the suit. I just had it cleaned. 174 00:08:02,479 --> 00:08:04,604 You promised you would help us reach our goal, 175 00:08:04,688 --> 00:08:06,021 and you let us down. 176 00:08:06,104 --> 00:08:07,855 [all] Yeah. 177 00:08:07,938 --> 00:08:10,187 But I have been keeping my promise. 178 00:08:10,271 --> 00:08:13,146 I organized the library, counted the reports, 179 00:08:13,229 --> 00:08:15,563 and don't forget my thermometer. 180 00:08:15,646 --> 00:08:17,604 It looks just like the one in the book. 181 00:08:17,688 --> 00:08:21,021 Yeah, and that's the only book you've read all month, Scott. 182 00:08:21,104 --> 00:08:23,771 Look, Scott, we know your heart's in the right place, 183 00:08:23,855 --> 00:08:25,813 but you're so buddy-buddy with Strickler now 184 00:08:25,896 --> 00:08:27,980 that you don't realize the truth. 185 00:08:28,062 --> 00:08:30,104 He gave you that job to stop you from reading 186 00:08:30,187 --> 00:08:33,062 so he wouldn't have to shave his head and paint it purple. 187 00:08:33,187 --> 00:08:34,604 No! No, you're lying! 188 00:08:34,688 --> 00:08:38,479 Our principal is a great man who wants his students to excel, 189 00:08:38,563 --> 00:08:42,563 and I am absolutely, positively not too buddy-buddy with Cubby. 190 00:08:42,646 --> 00:08:44,479 I mean, Crosby. 191 00:08:44,563 --> 00:08:45,646 I mean -- 192 00:08:45,730 --> 00:08:47,146 oh... 193 00:08:47,229 --> 00:08:49,813 I just can't believe it's true. 194 00:08:49,896 --> 00:08:52,354 There's only one way to find out. 195 00:08:52,438 --> 00:08:53,771 That's preposterous! 196 00:08:53,855 --> 00:08:57,938 I want my students to read and read plenty of books. 197 00:08:58,021 --> 00:09:00,396 Just not 2,000 books. 198 00:09:00,479 --> 00:09:01,771 I'm weak! 199 00:09:01,855 --> 00:09:03,187 Forgive me! 200 00:09:03,271 --> 00:09:06,104 I want my students to learn. I just don't want a purple head. 201 00:09:06,187 --> 00:09:07,730 Is that so bad? 202 00:09:07,813 --> 00:09:09,229 [sobbing] 203 00:09:09,312 --> 00:09:11,855 Oh, stop. Look at yourself. 204 00:09:11,938 --> 00:09:13,980 This isn't the Cubby I know. 205 00:09:14,062 --> 00:09:15,980 [crying] 206 00:09:16,062 --> 00:09:19,479 A guy like me can't change! 207 00:09:19,563 --> 00:09:22,688 I'm a bad man! 208 00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:24,646 Now stop that! 209 00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:25,813 You're not a bad man! 210 00:09:25,896 --> 00:09:28,855 You're a... moderately good man 211 00:09:28,938 --> 00:09:30,730 and a good principal. 212 00:09:30,813 --> 00:09:33,980 You got this entire school excited about reading, and why? 213 00:09:34,062 --> 00:09:35,896 Because you made a promise, 214 00:09:35,980 --> 00:09:37,730 and you said we were in this together. 215 00:09:37,813 --> 00:09:39,062 Well, we still are. 216 00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:41,646 The students have lived up to their promise, 217 00:09:41,730 --> 00:09:43,980 and now you have to live up to yours. 218 00:09:44,062 --> 00:09:45,563 Now, if you'll excuse me, 219 00:09:45,646 --> 00:09:48,938 there's a locker full of unread books waiting for me. 220 00:09:49,021 --> 00:09:50,104 [glass shatters] 221 00:09:50,187 --> 00:09:51,563 Heh heh heh. 222 00:09:53,104 --> 00:09:57,146 287 books in one night? 223 00:09:59,730 --> 00:10:03,062 "Oliver Twist" by Charles Dickens is a classic... 224 00:10:03,146 --> 00:10:06,146 "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" by Mark Twain 225 00:10:06,229 --> 00:10:08,354 is a great American novel... 226 00:10:08,438 --> 00:10:12,521 "10,001 Frog Names" is a mordantly witty treatise... 227 00:10:12,604 --> 00:10:14,813 [snoring] 228 00:10:21,104 --> 00:10:23,604 [all] 1,997... 229 00:10:23,688 --> 00:10:25,855 1,998... 230 00:10:25,938 --> 00:10:28,271 1,999! 231 00:10:28,354 --> 00:10:29,855 [all gasp] 232 00:10:29,938 --> 00:10:32,521 1,999?! 233 00:10:32,604 --> 00:10:34,563 That's impossible! 234 00:10:34,646 --> 00:10:37,521 I read exactly 287 books last night. 235 00:10:37,604 --> 00:10:40,813 I checked the thermometer before I -- 236 00:10:40,896 --> 00:10:42,730 [gasps] Strickler! 237 00:10:49,229 --> 00:10:51,396 Heh heh heh heh heh! 238 00:10:51,479 --> 00:10:52,646 I failed you twice. 239 00:10:52,730 --> 00:10:55,688 Once be being suckered in by our principal, 240 00:10:55,771 --> 00:10:57,354 and again by thinking 241 00:10:57,438 --> 00:11:00,312 I had shown him the way to redemption. 242 00:11:00,396 --> 00:11:01,479 Oh! 243 00:11:01,563 --> 00:11:03,062 And there's only 20 seconds left. 244 00:11:03,146 --> 00:11:04,646 There's no way we can come up 245 00:11:04,730 --> 00:11:06,229 with another book report by then. 246 00:11:06,312 --> 00:11:07,813 Yes, we can! 247 00:11:08,563 --> 00:11:10,646 Cubby, you did it! 248 00:11:10,730 --> 00:11:13,271 You searched your soul! 249 00:11:18,938 --> 00:11:20,563 [alarm rings] 250 00:11:20,646 --> 00:11:22,062 We did it! 251 00:11:22,146 --> 00:11:23,896 [cheering] 252 00:11:26,646 --> 00:11:28,229 [buzzing] 253 00:11:31,855 --> 00:11:33,521 Aah! 254 00:11:47,688 --> 00:11:50,730 [cartoon sound effects playing] 255 00:11:50,813 --> 00:11:53,688 [laughter] 256 00:11:56,187 --> 00:11:57,938 [laughter] 257 00:11:58,021 --> 00:11:59,438 Honey-poo... 258 00:11:59,521 --> 00:12:02,604 Haven't you seen this one about nine times? 259 00:12:02,688 --> 00:12:05,271 Oh, well, I just wanted to let you know the mail came. 260 00:12:05,354 --> 00:12:07,479 The new slicker edge catalog is here. 261 00:12:08,646 --> 00:12:12,521 The slicker edge catalog! Oh, boy! Oh, boy! 262 00:12:12,604 --> 00:12:14,688 I wonder what kind of slicker and edgier things 263 00:12:14,771 --> 00:12:15,813 they have this month. 264 00:12:15,896 --> 00:12:18,688 Robobark, the automated attack dog, 265 00:12:18,771 --> 00:12:21,813 a solar-powered outdoor icemaker and barbecue set. 266 00:12:21,896 --> 00:12:24,104 Oh, wow! 267 00:12:24,187 --> 00:12:26,604 Mom, check it out! 268 00:12:26,688 --> 00:12:29,479 Steel Saber. 269 00:12:29,563 --> 00:12:31,604 Why that's just a little old put-put scooter. 270 00:12:31,688 --> 00:12:34,021 What is so slick and edgy about that? 271 00:12:34,104 --> 00:12:36,104 The Steel Saber is aerodynamically designed 272 00:12:36,187 --> 00:12:37,896 to go faster than the skateboard. 273 00:12:37,980 --> 00:12:39,146 [coughing] 274 00:12:39,229 --> 00:12:42,855 It's b-1 shocks can take moguls better than a mountain bike. 275 00:12:42,938 --> 00:12:45,938 Wheels and handlebars come in five hot-florescent colors. 276 00:12:46,021 --> 00:12:48,730 And the whole ride folds up to fit in your backpack. 277 00:12:48,813 --> 00:12:50,855 That's what's so slick and edgy about it. 278 00:12:50,938 --> 00:12:52,312 Please, mom? Please? 279 00:12:52,396 --> 00:12:54,688 Can I get it? Huh? Can I? 280 00:12:54,771 --> 00:12:57,396 Well, heck in a handbag. I had no idea. 281 00:12:57,479 --> 00:12:59,521 I suppose I could buy one for you. 282 00:12:59,604 --> 00:13:00,771 Yeah! All right! 283 00:13:00,855 --> 00:13:04,604 But, you know, it would be ever so much more meaningful 284 00:13:04,688 --> 00:13:06,896 if you earned the money yourself. 285 00:13:06,980 --> 00:13:09,021 Aah! 286 00:13:09,104 --> 00:13:10,938 I'll never be able to do that. 287 00:13:11,021 --> 00:13:13,104 Oh, don't be a "can't do," Lenny. 288 00:13:13,187 --> 00:13:14,354 Be a "can do." 289 00:13:14,438 --> 00:13:15,646 When I was a little girl, 290 00:13:15,730 --> 00:13:17,271 there was something I wanted more than anything 291 00:13:17,354 --> 00:13:18,479 in the whole wide world, 292 00:13:18,563 --> 00:13:21,563 a "Little Miss Big Girl Mommy's Helper Cookie Baker Oven." 293 00:13:21,646 --> 00:13:23,479 Oh, please, Mommy! Please? 294 00:13:23,563 --> 00:13:24,813 If I don't get 295 00:13:24,813 --> 00:13:27,604 a Little Miss Big Girl Mommy's Helper Cookie Baker Oven, 296 00:13:27,688 --> 00:13:30,187 I'll never grow up to be a responsible and loving 297 00:13:30,271 --> 00:13:31,354 wife and mother. 298 00:13:31,438 --> 00:13:33,354 At least that's what the commercial says. 299 00:13:33,438 --> 00:13:35,396 Okey-dokey artichokey, young lady. 300 00:13:35,479 --> 00:13:37,396 You earn the money, and it's yours. 301 00:13:37,479 --> 00:13:39,396 But how? Oh, I'll never-- 302 00:13:39,479 --> 00:13:41,730 now don't be a "can't do," Mary Lou. 303 00:13:41,813 --> 00:13:45,021 Just put on your thinking cap and figure out how you can. 304 00:13:45,104 --> 00:13:47,938 So I put on my thinking cap-- hello!-- 305 00:13:48,021 --> 00:13:49,688 which for me was a lovely rhinestone tiara 306 00:13:49,771 --> 00:13:51,229 I had earned by saving 307 00:13:51,312 --> 00:13:53,688 three books worth of trading stamps. 308 00:13:53,771 --> 00:13:55,730 Ha ha! Oh, but that's another story -- 309 00:13:55,813 --> 00:13:58,396 and hatched a superific plan. 310 00:13:58,438 --> 00:14:00,187 My future was coming up lemons. 311 00:14:00,271 --> 00:14:03,021 And a mere six months later, viola! 312 00:14:03,104 --> 00:14:05,938 I had earned enough for the oven. 313 00:14:06,021 --> 00:14:09,396 It was the greatest day of my 10-year-old life. 314 00:14:09,479 --> 00:14:11,312 So, go sell your lemonade. 315 00:14:11,396 --> 00:14:13,730 And if you earn the money for the scooter, 316 00:14:13,813 --> 00:14:16,104 I'll pop for the matching helmet and kneepads. 317 00:14:16,187 --> 00:14:17,271 Then you'll be stylin' in safety. 318 00:14:17,354 --> 00:14:19,604 Hoo-ha! Ha ha ha ha! 319 00:14:19,688 --> 00:14:22,730 I hate when she tries to be slick and edgy. 320 00:14:22,813 --> 00:14:26,104 Yeah, it just makes her look stiff and stodgy. 321 00:14:26,187 --> 00:14:27,479 This is so great! 322 00:14:27,563 --> 00:14:29,938 Sell some lemonade, buy a scooter. 323 00:14:30,021 --> 00:14:32,730 The elegance of its simplicity makes one wonder 324 00:14:32,813 --> 00:14:37,062 why no one ever thought of it before. 325 00:14:37,479 --> 00:14:39,730 Lemonade! Come and get your lemonade! 326 00:14:39,813 --> 00:14:40,813 Scooter or bust! 327 00:14:40,896 --> 00:14:43,062 So sour your lips will sting! 328 00:14:43,146 --> 00:14:44,354 We've got pulp! 329 00:14:44,438 --> 00:14:45,604 Scooter or bust! 330 00:14:45,688 --> 00:14:48,187 Shoot! There goes that great plan. 331 00:14:48,312 --> 00:14:50,438 Now I'll never get my scooter. 332 00:14:50,563 --> 00:14:52,146 Hey, where are you going? 333 00:14:52,229 --> 00:14:55,896 I'm gonna drown my sorrow in a big glass of chocolate milk. 334 00:14:57,896 --> 00:15:00,771 Mother of invention, thy name is Leonard! 335 00:15:02,855 --> 00:15:04,646 But, of course, chocolate! 336 00:15:04,730 --> 00:15:07,563 The same elixir that was served to emperors and gods 337 00:15:07,646 --> 00:15:08,688 in the new world. 338 00:15:08,771 --> 00:15:10,813 Considered a great delicacy by the Aztecs. 339 00:15:10,896 --> 00:15:12,438 A favorite of Montezuma. 340 00:15:12,521 --> 00:15:15,146 Of course, it's poison to dogs, but they're not our clientele. 341 00:15:15,229 --> 00:15:16,271 Follow me! 342 00:15:16,354 --> 00:15:19,604 So we've got chocolate, hazelnut, ice, 343 00:15:19,688 --> 00:15:23,479 a little sugar, egg white for protein, cinnamon, 344 00:15:23,563 --> 00:15:25,396 all blended and frothed. 345 00:15:25,479 --> 00:15:27,271 And voilà! 346 00:15:27,354 --> 00:15:31,813 A fresh 'n' frozey chocolaccino! 347 00:15:36,229 --> 00:15:38,229 We're gonna be rich! 348 00:15:43,813 --> 00:15:44,938 Hey, guys. 349 00:15:45,021 --> 00:15:46,271 What are you selling? 350 00:15:46,396 --> 00:15:47,563 Oh, nothing. 351 00:15:47,646 --> 00:15:49,813 Just the one and only, truly original, 352 00:15:49,896 --> 00:15:52,229 blended-chocolate drink of the gods. 353 00:15:57,479 --> 00:15:58,563 Ahh! 354 00:15:58,688 --> 00:15:59,771 Oh, my goodness! 355 00:15:59,855 --> 00:16:02,980 That's the most delicious thing I've ever tasted! 356 00:16:03,104 --> 00:16:04,229 Can I have some more? 357 00:16:04,354 --> 00:16:05,354 Sure you can. 358 00:16:05,479 --> 00:16:06,938 50 cents for regular, 75 for large, 359 00:16:07,062 --> 00:16:09,229 and a dollar for our multi grande grande 360 00:16:09,312 --> 00:16:11,021 in a frosted recyclable plastic cup. 361 00:16:11,146 --> 00:16:13,646 Okay, let me go get some money out of my jar, 362 00:16:13,730 --> 00:16:15,062 and I'll be right back. 363 00:16:15,146 --> 00:16:17,938 It's gonna dip into my scooter fund, but it's worth it. 364 00:16:18,062 --> 00:16:19,438 Hey, everyone! 365 00:16:19,521 --> 00:16:21,479 You've got to taste Leonard and Scott's 366 00:16:21,563 --> 00:16:23,688 fresh 'n' frozey chocolaccinos! They're so yummy! 367 00:16:23,771 --> 00:16:25,062 Hey, I was here first. 368 00:16:25,146 --> 00:16:27,104 This is way better than lemonade! 369 00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:28,855 Oh, gosh! This is delicious! 370 00:16:28,938 --> 00:16:30,271 I'll take two regulars. 371 00:16:30,354 --> 00:16:31,980 Oh, gosh! Extra foam! 372 00:16:32,062 --> 00:16:34,104 I want one! Extra multi grande! 373 00:16:40,813 --> 00:16:42,479 Whoo-hoo-hoo! 374 00:16:42,563 --> 00:16:43,604 Look at this. 375 00:16:43,688 --> 00:16:46,771 We're on a rocket sled to scooter town. 376 00:16:49,396 --> 00:16:50,604 Uh-oh! 377 00:16:50,730 --> 00:16:52,604 We're almost out of everything except ice. 378 00:16:52,730 --> 00:16:56,312 We better close the stand and go buy more ingredients. 379 00:16:56,438 --> 00:16:59,104 Close the stand with customers waiting in line? 380 00:16:59,229 --> 00:17:01,271 Why, that's downright un-American! 381 00:17:01,396 --> 00:17:03,104 I'd like two chocolaccinos, please. 382 00:17:03,187 --> 00:17:04,021 Me, too. 383 00:17:04,104 --> 00:17:05,730 Excuse us for a moment. 384 00:17:07,479 --> 00:17:10,730 Listen -- we've got the public clamoring for our product. 385 00:17:10,855 --> 00:17:13,062 If we shut down now, we risk losing them. 386 00:17:13,187 --> 00:17:14,813 And then we'll never get our scooter. 387 00:17:14,938 --> 00:17:16,229 Our scooter? 388 00:17:16,312 --> 00:17:17,980 I thought it was my scooter. 389 00:17:18,104 --> 00:17:21,771 And what am I supposed to do, pull you around by my leash? 390 00:17:21,855 --> 00:17:24,312 That sounds like fun. 391 00:17:24,438 --> 00:17:25,813 Yeah, well, forget it. 392 00:17:25,896 --> 00:17:29,146 What do I look like, Yukon Spot the mush dog? 393 00:17:29,271 --> 00:17:31,896 Hey, are you guys selling chocolaccinos or what? 394 00:17:32,021 --> 00:17:35,563 Be right with you, sir. Service is my middle name. 395 00:17:35,688 --> 00:17:37,104 It is, really. 396 00:17:37,229 --> 00:17:40,646 What to do -- must think. 397 00:17:43,771 --> 00:17:45,896 Light bulb -- I've got the answer! 398 00:17:45,980 --> 00:17:48,104 Close down the stand, take our profits, 399 00:17:48,229 --> 00:17:49,855 and go buy some more supplies? 400 00:17:49,980 --> 00:17:51,771 No, we'll use our Yankee ingenuity 401 00:17:51,896 --> 00:17:53,229 and make do with what we got. 402 00:17:53,312 --> 00:17:55,438 We'll double the price! 403 00:17:55,563 --> 00:17:57,271 You can't serve these people ice. 404 00:17:57,396 --> 00:17:59,104 Watch me. 405 00:17:59,229 --> 00:18:00,688 Ladies and gentlemen, 406 00:18:00,771 --> 00:18:04,187 I know you came here and waited all this time in a big long line 407 00:18:04,312 --> 00:18:07,229 just so you could purchase a calorie-laden, caffeinated, 408 00:18:07,312 --> 00:18:08,688 disgustingly sweet drink 409 00:18:08,813 --> 00:18:11,563 that would lay on your stomach like a bucket of lard, 410 00:18:11,688 --> 00:18:14,229 clog your veins, and add inches to your already ample hips. 411 00:18:14,354 --> 00:18:17,855 Instead may I entice you to be among the first to try 412 00:18:17,980 --> 00:18:21,521 our brand-new-and-improved, revolutionary, incredible, 413 00:18:21,646 --> 00:18:24,479 zero-calorie diet iceaccino light. 414 00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:27,354 And what's more, it provides over 50 percent 415 00:18:27,438 --> 00:18:29,521 of your minimum daily water requirements. 416 00:18:29,646 --> 00:18:32,813 And as you know, our bodies are 98 percent water. 417 00:18:32,896 --> 00:18:36,104 So 50 percent of 98 percent -- well, you do the math. 418 00:18:36,229 --> 00:18:37,521 You body'll thank you for it! 419 00:18:37,646 --> 00:18:39,855 Step up now while supplies last. 420 00:18:41,438 --> 00:18:43,062 Wow, they're actually happy. 421 00:18:43,187 --> 00:18:45,563 Happy is my middle name. 422 00:18:45,688 --> 00:18:47,354 I thought you told that guy it was service. 423 00:18:47,438 --> 00:18:51,521 It is -- Scott Happy Service Leadready II. 424 00:18:56,229 --> 00:18:57,354 What did I tell you? 425 00:18:57,438 --> 00:19:00,104 It's like taking chew toys from a puppy. 426 00:19:00,187 --> 00:19:01,771 There you go. Enjoy. 427 00:19:01,855 --> 00:19:04,771 Bottoms up, salud, le'Chaim and all that good stuff. 428 00:19:04,896 --> 00:19:07,229 Whoo-hoo! Look at all this money! 429 00:19:07,354 --> 00:19:08,813 You were so totally right! 430 00:19:08,938 --> 00:19:10,688 I'll bet we have enough for two scooters, 431 00:19:10,771 --> 00:19:12,771 and it only took us a day. 432 00:19:12,855 --> 00:19:15,062 You are the greatest businessman ever! 433 00:19:15,187 --> 00:19:17,187 And do you know why, Leonard? 434 00:19:17,271 --> 00:19:19,896 No, but I have a feeling you're gonna tell me. 435 00:19:20,021 --> 00:19:22,813 Because I embody the entrepreneurial spirit 436 00:19:22,938 --> 00:19:24,813 that makes the free market soar! 437 00:19:24,938 --> 00:19:26,396 You mean sell them lousy product 438 00:19:26,521 --> 00:19:28,896 because they're not smart enough to notice the difference. 439 00:19:29,021 --> 00:19:31,479 As entrepreneur extraordinaire P.T. Barnum 440 00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:33,938 is incorrectly supposed to have said, 441 00:19:34,062 --> 00:19:36,021 "there's a sucker born every minute." 442 00:19:36,146 --> 00:19:37,521 Hey, I want my money back! 443 00:19:37,646 --> 00:19:38,688 Why? 444 00:19:38,771 --> 00:19:40,187 Because I don't like this stuff! 445 00:19:40,312 --> 00:19:41,396 Why not? 446 00:19:41,521 --> 00:19:43,479 Because it's all ice and no "cino." 447 00:19:43,604 --> 00:19:45,730 He's right. I can make this at home! 448 00:19:45,855 --> 00:19:46,730 We've been ripped off! 449 00:19:46,855 --> 00:19:49,062 Whoa! Look at the time. I'm sorry. We're closed. 450 00:19:49,187 --> 00:19:50,521 Come back tomorrow. 451 00:19:50,646 --> 00:19:51,521 Oh, no, you don't! 452 00:19:51,646 --> 00:19:54,604 You boys aren't going anywhere until you refund all our money! 453 00:19:54,688 --> 00:19:57,354 Of course, we aren't. Leonard, what were you thinking? 454 00:19:57,438 --> 00:19:59,104 Give the nice people their money back. 455 00:20:03,604 --> 00:20:05,563 How much did you make? 456 00:20:05,646 --> 00:20:07,146 17 bucks. 457 00:20:07,271 --> 00:20:09,354 Hey, come on, bunky. Buck up. 458 00:20:09,438 --> 00:20:12,563 We'll just open up tomorrow with fresh ingredients 459 00:20:12,646 --> 00:20:15,604 and get those scooters in no time flat. 460 00:20:15,730 --> 00:20:18,938 Are you kidding? Our reputations are shot. 461 00:20:19,062 --> 00:20:22,730 No one will ever buy another blended drink from us again. 462 00:20:22,855 --> 00:20:24,646 Didn't you hear what they were calling us? 463 00:20:24,771 --> 00:20:25,938 Yes, I did. 464 00:20:26,021 --> 00:20:28,855 And I have to say I thought Scott Lie-ready II 465 00:20:28,938 --> 00:20:31,771 and Leonard help-yourself-to-our-money-man 466 00:20:31,855 --> 00:20:33,396 were a little over the top. 467 00:20:33,479 --> 00:20:36,688 If only there were some way to regain their trust. 468 00:20:36,813 --> 00:20:38,438 Wait a minute! 469 00:20:38,563 --> 00:20:40,271 Light bulb! 470 00:20:40,396 --> 00:20:42,604 On, no! Not another light bulb! 471 00:20:42,730 --> 00:20:45,771 Yes, and this one's twice as incandescent, wattage-laden, 472 00:20:45,855 --> 00:20:48,104 and energy-efficient as the last one. 473 00:20:48,229 --> 00:20:52,521 And it powers a very clever little product. 474 00:20:52,604 --> 00:20:54,688 Get your free cookies! 475 00:20:54,813 --> 00:20:56,896 Fresh and hot from the original 476 00:20:56,980 --> 00:20:59,980 Little Miss Big Girl Mommy's Helper Cookie Baker Oven! 477 00:21:00,104 --> 00:21:02,062 That's right, folks. 478 00:21:02,146 --> 00:21:03,855 I said, "free." 479 00:21:04,646 --> 00:21:05,604 It's still warm. 480 00:21:05,730 --> 00:21:07,271 Just like when I was a kid. 481 00:21:07,396 --> 00:21:08,855 And they're free. 482 00:21:08,938 --> 00:21:11,104 You guys are great! 483 00:21:11,229 --> 00:21:13,646 Well, there it is, Leonard. 484 00:21:13,730 --> 00:21:18,396 Though I rarely make mistakes, this one was a doozy. 485 00:21:18,521 --> 00:21:22,896 I horribly misinterpreted the entrepreneurial spirit. 486 00:21:23,021 --> 00:21:25,813 It turns out it's not about making a quick buck, 487 00:21:25,938 --> 00:21:27,813 but about creating a reliable product, 488 00:21:27,938 --> 00:21:30,229 and then upholding its quality and integrity. 489 00:21:30,354 --> 00:21:32,563 It's about keeping all your dealings, 490 00:21:32,688 --> 00:21:35,396 whether business or personal, on the up and up. 491 00:21:35,521 --> 00:21:36,896 And treating your customers 492 00:21:37,021 --> 00:21:40,271 with all the openness and honesty they so richly deserve. 493 00:21:43,688 --> 00:21:47,521 Say, you don't happen to have any milk, do you? 494 00:21:49,104 --> 00:21:50,312 Milk? 495 00:21:59,688 --> 00:22:00,896 That's right, folks. 496 00:22:01,021 --> 00:22:02,813 Step right up and get a nice, tall glass 497 00:22:02,896 --> 00:22:03,896 of good, wholesome milk. 498 00:22:04,021 --> 00:22:06,229 Then again, there's nothing wrong 499 00:22:06,354 --> 00:22:09,688 with identifying a market need and then satisfying it.