1 00:00:00,354 --> 00:00:01,479 ♪ Born on the wrong end Of the leash ♪ 2 00:00:01,563 --> 00:00:04,104 -♪ He was a dreamer ♪ -♪ And a little schemer ♪ 3 00:00:04,187 --> 00:00:05,813 ♪ A nutty mutt living a dog's life ♪ 4 00:00:05,896 --> 00:00:07,438 ♪ But when he'd hear the bell for school ♪ 5 00:00:07,521 --> 00:00:08,354 ♪ He'd start to drool ♪ 6 00:00:08,438 --> 00:00:10,146 -♪ One day he says ♪ -♪ I'll take a chance ♪ 7 00:00:10,229 --> 00:00:11,855 ♪ Trades his leash For a pair of pants ♪ 8 00:00:11,938 --> 00:00:14,229 ♪ In a glance, school becomes His favorite pastime ♪ 9 00:00:14,312 --> 00:00:16,604 ♪ I have buried a bone For the last time ♪ 10 00:00:16,688 --> 00:00:18,312 -♪ He says ♪ -♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 11 00:00:18,396 --> 00:00:19,646 ♪ Ooh, he's bad ♪ 12 00:00:19,730 --> 00:00:21,146 ♪ He's so over just being rover ♪ 13 00:00:21,229 --> 00:00:22,604 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 14 00:00:22,688 --> 00:00:25,062 ♪ He says he's just gonna be a boy ♪ 15 00:00:25,146 --> 00:00:26,688 ♪ Turns out he's a regular Einstein ♪ 16 00:00:26,771 --> 00:00:28,438 ♪ And Leonard is treading a fine line ♪ 17 00:00:28,521 --> 00:00:30,980 Why can't I be a normal kid like any other? 18 00:00:31,062 --> 00:00:33,146 Now, doodle bug, listen to mother. 19 00:00:33,229 --> 00:00:34,938 ♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 20 00:00:35,021 --> 00:00:36,938 I hate dogs. 21 00:00:37,021 --> 00:00:39,479 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 22 00:00:39,563 --> 00:00:41,479 ♪ This power pup's gonna be a boy ♪ 23 00:00:41,563 --> 00:00:43,521 I do not wish to be a dog. 24 00:00:43,604 --> 00:00:46,104 ♪ Now this bowser's ready for trousers ♪ 25 00:00:46,187 --> 00:00:47,521 ♪ I got to be a boy ♪ 26 00:00:47,604 --> 00:00:49,104 ♪ His nose is wet but you can bet ♪ 27 00:00:49,187 --> 00:00:52,229 ♪ This teacher's pet is gonna be a boy ♪ 28 00:00:52,312 --> 00:00:54,146 Yes! 29 00:01:10,521 --> 00:01:14,229 The word is "antidisestablishmentarianism." 30 00:01:14,312 --> 00:01:20,312 A-L-M-A-Z-Z-R-I-I-T... 31 00:01:20,438 --> 00:01:23,271 Z-M. 32 00:01:23,354 --> 00:01:27,604 The word is still "antidisestablishmentarianism." 33 00:01:30,062 --> 00:01:36,062 A-N-T-I-D-I-S-E-S-T-A-B-L-I-S-H- M-E-N-T-A-R-I-A-N-I-S-M. 34 00:01:37,354 --> 00:01:38,271 Correct! 35 00:01:38,354 --> 00:01:39,187 [cheering] 36 00:01:39,980 --> 00:01:42,688 Congratulations, Scott Leadready II. 37 00:01:42,771 --> 00:01:45,688 You are hereby proclaimed champion speller 38 00:01:45,771 --> 00:01:48,354 of Fala D. Roosevelt Elementary School 39 00:01:48,438 --> 00:01:52,271 and our representative at this year's county spelling bee! 40 00:01:52,354 --> 00:01:55,563 I am? Oh, joy of joys! 41 00:01:55,646 --> 00:01:58,688 I'm king of the universe! 42 00:01:58,771 --> 00:02:01,688 I was robbed by the man! 43 00:02:03,187 --> 00:02:04,855 What do you see there, my boy? 44 00:02:04,938 --> 00:02:07,521 Uh, a dead spider being carted away 45 00:02:07,604 --> 00:02:08,771 by a bunch of ants? 46 00:02:08,855 --> 00:02:09,688 [blows] Now what do you see? 47 00:02:11,104 --> 00:02:13,646 I see an empty trophy case, sir. 48 00:02:13,730 --> 00:02:15,813 That's right, son, and the reason it's empty 49 00:02:15,896 --> 00:02:18,479 is because that darned West East Westland Elementary 50 00:02:18,563 --> 00:02:19,938 always beats us. 51 00:02:20,021 --> 00:02:23,062 And my rival principal there, Nash Brickler, 52 00:02:23,146 --> 00:02:26,563 never misses an opportunity to rub it in my face. 53 00:02:26,646 --> 00:02:28,646 [imitating Brickler] Sorry we took first place again, Crosby, 54 00:02:29,980 --> 00:02:33,146 while you were tied for last-- with the school for losers! 55 00:02:33,229 --> 00:02:36,187 But this time, we're gonna show Nash Brickler 56 00:02:36,271 --> 00:02:37,563 that we can bring home 57 00:02:37,646 --> 00:02:40,646 that glorious second place trophy at last. 58 00:02:40,730 --> 00:02:42,646 Why not first place? 59 00:02:42,730 --> 00:02:44,312 Eric Mark Krabitz is why-- 60 00:02:44,396 --> 00:02:47,396 the best speller in the history of this school district, 61 00:02:47,479 --> 00:02:50,104 maybe any school district-- he's never been beat. 62 00:02:50,187 --> 00:02:54,312 Well, sir, blow a little more dust off the old trophy shelf, 63 00:02:54,396 --> 00:02:57,771 because Eric Mark Krabitz has just met his match! 64 00:02:57,855 --> 00:03:01,688 Can it be true? Do you really mean... 65 00:03:06,563 --> 00:03:08,646 Hello? West East Westland Elementary. 66 00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:11,563 Home of the Spelling Spartans. Nash Brickler speaking. 67 00:03:11,646 --> 00:03:13,646 Hey, Brickler, spell this-- "runner-up"! 68 00:03:13,730 --> 00:03:16,688 As in second best! As in lo-o-o-ser! 69 00:03:16,771 --> 00:03:17,604 [hangs up] 70 00:03:18,229 --> 00:03:21,021 Hello? Hello? Darn kids! 71 00:03:23,062 --> 00:03:23,896 [snoring] 72 00:03:25,604 --> 00:03:27,229 Oh, Pretty Boy. 73 00:03:27,312 --> 00:03:29,229 Hmm? 74 00:03:30,396 --> 00:03:31,563 Guess what time it is? 75 00:03:31,646 --> 00:03:33,688 Time to give the person who woke me up such a zets 76 00:03:33,771 --> 00:03:35,479 it'll give his whole family a headache?! 77 00:03:35,563 --> 00:03:37,646 Ta-da! 78 00:03:37,730 --> 00:03:38,938 You disturbed my beauty rest 79 00:03:39,021 --> 00:03:40,896 to show me a glockenspiel on wheels?! 80 00:03:40,980 --> 00:03:43,396 No. [dings] 81 00:03:43,479 --> 00:03:46,521 I disturbed your beauty rest because you said it would be 82 00:03:46,604 --> 00:03:49,479 a hot day in December before you'd give me singing lessons. 83 00:03:49,563 --> 00:03:50,730 Remember? 84 00:03:50,813 --> 00:03:51,938 Yeah. So what? 85 00:03:56,604 --> 00:03:57,521 Huh? 86 00:03:57,604 --> 00:04:00,271 Well, I figure if we start today, 87 00:04:00,354 --> 00:04:03,104 I could have "The Tiny Flugelhorn Girl" 88 00:04:03,187 --> 00:04:05,271 down pat in time for Christmas. 89 00:04:05,354 --> 00:04:07,563 That'll teach me to make stupid promises 90 00:04:07,646 --> 00:04:09,855 without consulting "The Farmer's Almanac"... 91 00:04:09,938 --> 00:04:12,938 But I am a bird of my word, so let's get started. 92 00:04:13,021 --> 00:04:13,855 [dinging] 93 00:04:15,438 --> 00:04:16,271 [inhales, clears throat] 94 00:04:17,187 --> 00:04:19,438 [caterwauling] 95 00:04:25,438 --> 00:04:28,062 Apparently that's [clears throat] not my key. 96 00:04:28,146 --> 00:04:31,396 Pretty Boy, Mr. Jolly... I have news. 97 00:04:31,479 --> 00:04:34,771 Before you stands the next county spelling champion! 98 00:04:34,855 --> 00:04:36,563 That'll win you a lot of popularity contests. 99 00:04:36,646 --> 00:04:39,354 Well, that's all very nice for you, spot, 100 00:04:39,438 --> 00:04:40,896 but I have news of my own. 101 00:04:40,980 --> 00:04:43,563 Pretty Boy has agreed to teach me how to sing. 102 00:04:43,646 --> 00:04:45,104 Silence! 103 00:04:45,187 --> 00:04:47,646 From now on, you will only use your instrument 104 00:04:47,730 --> 00:04:49,813 when I tell you and how I tell you! 105 00:04:49,896 --> 00:04:51,479 Yes, maestro. 106 00:04:51,563 --> 00:04:53,646 I said, "silence"! 107 00:04:53,730 --> 00:04:55,563 -[dings] -[humming] 108 00:04:55,646 --> 00:04:56,896 [caterwauling] 109 00:04:57,563 --> 00:04:58,980 -[dings] -[humming] 110 00:04:59,062 --> 00:04:59,980 [caterwauling] 111 00:05:02,980 --> 00:05:04,521 Look what I got-- 112 00:05:04,604 --> 00:05:07,146 the word list from last year's county spelling bee. 113 00:05:07,229 --> 00:05:08,521 Lenny, my naive friend, 114 00:05:08,604 --> 00:05:10,813 by the time you get to the county bee level, 115 00:05:10,896 --> 00:05:12,938 you're not studying the list anymore. 116 00:05:13,062 --> 00:05:15,354 So you know every word on this list? 117 00:05:15,438 --> 00:05:17,646 Duh, yeah. 118 00:05:17,730 --> 00:05:19,146 "Hors d'oeuvres"? 119 00:05:19,229 --> 00:05:20,688 Two words-- silent "h," 120 00:05:20,771 --> 00:05:22,855 apostrophe between the "d" and the "o." 121 00:05:22,938 --> 00:05:23,813 [caterwauling continues] 122 00:05:24,730 --> 00:05:26,312 Um, "misspell." 123 00:05:26,396 --> 00:05:29,604 Leonard, your attempt at irony is cute-- really, it is-- 124 00:05:29,688 --> 00:05:32,521 but they don't let you go to the county spelling bee 125 00:05:32,604 --> 00:05:34,855 if you're gonna M-I-S-S-P-E-L-L "misspell." 126 00:05:34,938 --> 00:05:37,062 So you're just gonna hang out and do nothing? 127 00:05:37,146 --> 00:05:38,396 No, Leonard! 128 00:05:38,479 --> 00:05:40,980 I'm going to do what every great champion does-- 129 00:05:41,062 --> 00:05:43,062 take full measure of my opponent, 130 00:05:43,146 --> 00:05:45,938 study his every move so that he cannot take a step 131 00:05:46,021 --> 00:05:47,688 without me taking it first, 132 00:05:47,771 --> 00:05:50,646 and then, when I know him better than he knows himself, 133 00:05:50,730 --> 00:05:52,062 attack and win the bee! 134 00:05:52,146 --> 00:05:52,980 [caterwauling] 135 00:05:53,604 --> 00:05:56,146 Now would you two knock it off with the glockenspiel?! 136 00:05:56,229 --> 00:05:57,688 [glockenspiel dings] 137 00:06:12,563 --> 00:06:13,604 It sure was a lucky coincidence 138 00:06:13,688 --> 00:06:15,688 that Principal Strickler decided to give us 139 00:06:15,771 --> 00:06:18,438 Fala D. Roosevelt's birthday off from school this year. 140 00:06:18,521 --> 00:06:21,604 Otherwise, we wouldn't be able to spy on this Krabitz kid. 141 00:06:21,688 --> 00:06:23,021 Okay, here's the plan-- 142 00:06:23,104 --> 00:06:25,021 first, we study the enemy's moves 143 00:06:25,104 --> 00:06:26,563 in his academic environment. 144 00:06:26,646 --> 00:06:29,646 I still think you should study the list from last year. 145 00:06:29,730 --> 00:06:31,354 I laugh at last year's list. 146 00:06:31,438 --> 00:06:34,146 The key to victory lies not in some old list, 147 00:06:34,229 --> 00:06:36,021 but in the mind of one's enemy. 148 00:06:36,104 --> 00:06:37,646 Watch and learn. 149 00:06:45,146 --> 00:06:47,730 Ah, there he is-- the hated rival. 150 00:06:47,813 --> 00:06:52,062 Eric Mark Krabitz, you are mine. 151 00:06:52,146 --> 00:06:54,438 Okay, now you're creeping me out. 152 00:06:58,730 --> 00:07:00,855 [all snickering] 153 00:07:05,688 --> 00:07:09,354 Look at that focus! The kid's amazing! 154 00:07:09,438 --> 00:07:11,021 Look at them laughing. 155 00:07:12,646 --> 00:07:14,771 The kid's a dork. 156 00:07:19,104 --> 00:07:21,104 Right field! Look up, Krabitz! 157 00:07:21,187 --> 00:07:22,354 What's wrong with you?! 158 00:07:22,438 --> 00:07:24,396 Come on, Krabitz, look up. 159 00:07:24,479 --> 00:07:25,813 Fascinating. 160 00:07:26,730 --> 00:07:29,563 -Aw, Krabitz! -Aw, man! 161 00:07:52,730 --> 00:07:54,479 Behold, Leonard... 162 00:07:54,563 --> 00:07:57,813 The lion in his den. 163 00:07:57,896 --> 00:07:59,688 I'm pretty sure that's the kitchen. 164 00:07:59,771 --> 00:08:02,396 That's not what I-- oh, never mind! 165 00:08:02,479 --> 00:08:04,730 Follow me. 166 00:08:06,771 --> 00:08:08,604 Darn it! Where'd he go? 167 00:08:08,688 --> 00:08:11,563 I don't know, but he sure seems lonely. 168 00:08:11,646 --> 00:08:13,688 Yeah-- lonely like a shark! 169 00:08:18,771 --> 00:08:20,021 Aah! 170 00:08:20,104 --> 00:08:22,646 Who are you two, and why have you been following me all day? 171 00:08:22,730 --> 00:08:24,062 [nervously] Oh, uh, hi, there, Eric Mark, 172 00:08:25,271 --> 00:08:27,187 or do you prefer just Eric-- 173 00:08:27,271 --> 00:08:29,604 or-- or just Mark-- or maybe Mr. Krabitz? 174 00:08:29,688 --> 00:08:32,104 I'd prefer that you just tell me what's going on here. 175 00:08:32,187 --> 00:08:34,563 Yes, of course you would. It's quite simple, really. 176 00:08:34,646 --> 00:08:36,604 What's going on is, uh, 177 00:08:36,688 --> 00:08:39,604 that my friend and I are huge fans of yours 178 00:08:39,688 --> 00:08:42,688 and passionate devotees of "The Bee," 179 00:08:42,771 --> 00:08:44,479 and, well, we wanted to-- 180 00:08:44,563 --> 00:08:46,855 that is, we were hoping that we could, you know, 181 00:08:46,938 --> 00:08:49,479 get to know you a little bit-- you know, hang out. 182 00:08:49,563 --> 00:08:51,855 Really? You want to hang out with me? 183 00:08:51,938 --> 00:08:54,146 Do we? Oh, we sure do! 184 00:08:54,229 --> 00:08:55,730 Don't we? 185 00:08:55,813 --> 00:08:57,730 Oh, absolutely. 186 00:08:57,813 --> 00:09:00,688 Well, um, I guess that would be okay. 187 00:09:00,771 --> 00:09:02,312 So, what are your names? 188 00:09:02,396 --> 00:09:03,438 My name's-- 189 00:09:03,521 --> 00:09:07,813 his name's Ian Wazselewski, and I'm Yung-Hi Mandelbaum. 190 00:09:07,896 --> 00:09:09,730 So come on in. I'll show you around. 191 00:09:09,813 --> 00:09:14,813 Welcome to my world. What do you think? 192 00:09:14,896 --> 00:09:16,146 It's incredible. 193 00:09:16,229 --> 00:09:18,896 No, "incredible" doesn't do it justice. 194 00:09:18,980 --> 00:09:21,104 It's-- it's really... Good. 195 00:09:21,187 --> 00:09:23,104 Oh, why won't the words come?! 196 00:09:23,187 --> 00:09:26,062 What I'm trying to say is it's-- it's... 197 00:09:26,146 --> 00:09:28,896 Incogitable? Insupposable? Unfathomable? 198 00:09:28,980 --> 00:09:31,187 Yes, yes, and yes! 199 00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:34,521 How about you, Ian? Do you like it? 200 00:09:34,604 --> 00:09:37,646 Eric Mark asked if you like his room, Ian. 201 00:09:37,730 --> 00:09:41,688 Oh, yeah, right. Uh, it's, uh, neat. 202 00:09:41,771 --> 00:09:42,938 Say, I have an idea. 203 00:09:43,021 --> 00:09:45,438 How about a rousing game of Aramaic anagrams? 204 00:09:49,229 --> 00:09:52,646 So, Eric Mark, if I may be so bold... 205 00:09:52,730 --> 00:09:55,271 What's your secret? I mean, how do you always win? 206 00:09:55,354 --> 00:09:57,855 The first thing I do is study the list from previous bees. 207 00:09:57,938 --> 00:10:00,563 I mean, you'd have to be an idiot not to do that, right? 208 00:10:00,646 --> 00:10:01,938 Oh-ho, of course. 209 00:10:02,021 --> 00:10:03,855 But what sets me apart is my knowledge of 210 00:10:03,938 --> 00:10:06,438 secondary languages like Gaelic, Swahili-- even Navajo-- 211 00:10:06,521 --> 00:10:07,896 and the subtle nuances 212 00:10:07,980 --> 00:10:09,980 of letter-slash-word correlations that provides-- 213 00:10:10,062 --> 00:10:12,521 in addition, of course, to being fluent in Latin and Greek. 214 00:10:12,604 --> 00:10:14,646 And here I thought it would be something complicated. 215 00:10:14,730 --> 00:10:16,396 So, what do you do for fun? 216 00:10:16,479 --> 00:10:18,688 What do you mean? Ian. 217 00:10:18,771 --> 00:10:21,229 I mean fun-- you know, playing, watching TV, riding bikes. 218 00:10:21,312 --> 00:10:22,730 That kind of stuff. 219 00:10:22,813 --> 00:10:25,521 Ian, you're being rude! 220 00:10:25,604 --> 00:10:26,771 No, it's okay. 221 00:10:26,855 --> 00:10:30,062 The answer is simple-- fun is a luxury I can't afford. 222 00:10:30,146 --> 00:10:33,813 To be a true champion of the bee requires total dedication. 223 00:10:33,896 --> 00:10:36,312 So you never play? 224 00:10:36,396 --> 00:10:37,354 Never. 225 00:10:37,438 --> 00:10:40,604 Eric Mark Krabitz, you are a shining star, 226 00:10:40,688 --> 00:10:44,104 a supernova in a universe of flashlights! 227 00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:48,604 Thanks for coming over, Yung-Hi and Ian. 228 00:10:48,688 --> 00:10:51,021 I hope you can make it to the county championship 229 00:10:51,104 --> 00:10:52,980 to watch me destroy the competition. 230 00:10:53,062 --> 00:10:54,646 Yes, well, I'll try to make it. 231 00:10:54,730 --> 00:10:57,980 Although, you never know-- I might be sick that day. 232 00:10:58,062 --> 00:11:01,563 Did you hear that, Leonard? He's going to destroy me. 233 00:11:01,646 --> 00:11:04,146 Oh, I'm sorry, Yung-hi, were you talking to me? 234 00:11:07,312 --> 00:11:08,312 [Native-American music plays] 235 00:11:09,354 --> 00:11:12,730 The kid speaks Navajo, for crying out loud. 236 00:11:12,813 --> 00:11:15,604 The only people who speak Navajo are Navajos... 237 00:11:15,688 --> 00:11:17,187 And Eric Mark Krabitz. 238 00:11:17,271 --> 00:11:19,646 He isn't human, I tell ya-- of course, neither am I-- 239 00:11:19,730 --> 00:11:21,563 but that's not the point! 240 00:11:21,646 --> 00:11:24,271 Oh, why did I waste all those years eating and breathing 241 00:11:24,354 --> 00:11:26,938 and talking when I should have been studying spelling?! 242 00:11:27,021 --> 00:11:29,855 Because you're normal, and normal kids-- and dogs-- 243 00:11:29,938 --> 00:11:32,646 are supposed to have fun every now and then, 244 00:11:32,730 --> 00:11:35,688 not spend every minute of every day studying spelling. 245 00:11:35,771 --> 00:11:39,688 You're right, I am normal-- too normal-- but not anymore! 246 00:11:39,771 --> 00:11:43,521 From now on I'm going to be abnormal like Krabitz! 247 00:11:43,604 --> 00:11:45,855 Now, nobody talk! I must think! 248 00:11:45,938 --> 00:11:46,771 [squeaking] 249 00:11:47,730 --> 00:11:48,563 [gasps] 250 00:11:48,855 --> 00:11:49,688 [dings] 251 00:11:50,396 --> 00:11:53,396 All right, that's it! Enough with the glockenspiel! 252 00:11:53,438 --> 00:11:55,604 From now on, this glockenspiel ceases to exist! 253 00:11:55,688 --> 00:11:57,271 I am taking this glockenspiel 254 00:11:57,354 --> 00:11:59,604 and dragging it into the garbage can 255 00:11:59,688 --> 00:12:01,312 on the hard drive of my mind. 256 00:12:01,438 --> 00:12:04,104 You are hereby erased from my memory forever! 257 00:12:07,062 --> 00:12:08,646 The pooch has finally flipped. 258 00:12:08,730 --> 00:12:10,813 I heard that. 259 00:12:12,688 --> 00:12:14,646 Okay, we'll start with this, 260 00:12:14,730 --> 00:12:17,521 beginning with "a" and working our way to "z." 261 00:12:17,604 --> 00:12:20,062 Boy, it's a good thing we followed Krabitz around all day. 262 00:12:20,146 --> 00:12:21,855 Otherwise you would have never come up 263 00:12:21,938 --> 00:12:23,479 with that "A to Z" thing. 264 00:12:23,563 --> 00:12:27,479 Ah, sarcasm-- the last refuge of a meager mind. 265 00:12:27,563 --> 00:12:29,479 Blah, blah, blah. Let's get started. 266 00:12:29,563 --> 00:12:31,479 The first word is "aardvark." 267 00:12:31,563 --> 00:12:34,646 Aardvark. A-A-R-D-V... 268 00:12:34,730 --> 00:12:35,521 [clock ticking] 269 00:12:36,771 --> 00:12:39,521 Abscissa. Hmm. Word form? 270 00:12:39,604 --> 00:12:40,521 Noun. 271 00:12:40,604 --> 00:12:42,771 -Origin? -Latin. 272 00:12:42,855 --> 00:12:45,730 What do you mean you're not gonna help me anymore?! 273 00:12:45,813 --> 00:12:48,688 I told you-- this is stupid. We're still on the As! 274 00:12:48,771 --> 00:12:50,604 You're already a great speller, 275 00:12:50,688 --> 00:12:53,688 and I'm not gonna lock myself in a room day after day, 276 00:12:53,771 --> 00:12:56,938 wasting my life, so you can try to win a stupid spelling bee! 277 00:12:57,021 --> 00:12:58,563 Try to win? 278 00:12:58,646 --> 00:13:02,187 I'm not going to try to win, I'm going to win! 279 00:13:02,271 --> 00:13:04,354 I will win! I must win! 280 00:13:04,438 --> 00:13:06,646 [classical music plays] 281 00:13:17,354 --> 00:13:19,021 Ha ha ha! 282 00:13:24,396 --> 00:13:26,604 [snoring] 283 00:13:29,688 --> 00:13:32,521 Look at him-- sleeping up there all snuggly-wuggly. 284 00:13:32,604 --> 00:13:35,229 You know who sleeps at night? Losers, that's who! 285 00:13:35,312 --> 00:13:37,312 Well, we'll see how well you sleep 286 00:13:37,396 --> 00:13:38,938 when I'm champion of the world, 287 00:13:39,021 --> 00:13:41,980 and you're just a big old sleepyheaded loser, Krabitz! 288 00:13:42,062 --> 00:13:44,980 No, wait-- you're not Krabitz. You're that other one. 289 00:13:45,062 --> 00:13:45,896 [snoring] 290 00:13:47,438 --> 00:13:50,104 Mr. Chowszelewski. 291 00:13:50,187 --> 00:13:53,479 The word is "frascalhasa-apso." 292 00:13:53,563 --> 00:13:55,604 Frascalhasa-apso. 293 00:13:55,688 --> 00:13:58,187 That is so cinchy. 294 00:13:58,271 --> 00:14:01,229 Okay, frascalhasa-apso. 295 00:14:01,312 --> 00:14:07,354 F-R-A-S-C-A-L-H-A-S-A-hyphen- 296 00:14:07,563 --> 00:14:09,438 A-P-S-O! 297 00:14:09,521 --> 00:14:10,855 That is correct! 298 00:14:10,938 --> 00:14:11,771 [cheering and barking] 299 00:14:12,938 --> 00:14:15,104 Mr. Helperschnauzer. 300 00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:16,771 The word is... 301 00:14:16,855 --> 00:14:19,604 On second thought, fetch! 302 00:14:19,688 --> 00:14:20,521 [cheering and barking] 303 00:14:21,646 --> 00:14:27,438 Eric Mutt Krabitz, your word is "crustadinglycacapoo." 304 00:14:27,521 --> 00:14:28,354 [barking] 305 00:14:31,312 --> 00:14:32,146 [whimpers] 306 00:14:33,479 --> 00:14:36,354 Absolutely correct, Mr. Krabitz! 307 00:14:36,438 --> 00:14:38,646 Now your turn, Mr. Leadready-- 308 00:14:38,730 --> 00:14:40,604 if that's even your real name. 309 00:14:40,688 --> 00:14:42,980 The word is "cat." 310 00:14:43,062 --> 00:14:44,521 "Cat"?! 311 00:14:44,604 --> 00:14:46,813 I thought we were just doing bizarre dog words! 312 00:14:46,896 --> 00:14:48,938 I mean, "cat" wasn't even on the list! 313 00:14:49,021 --> 00:14:50,813 Did you study your Navajo? 314 00:14:50,896 --> 00:14:52,021 Navajo?! 315 00:14:52,104 --> 00:14:54,938 Oh, no! Say it ain't so! 316 00:14:55,021 --> 00:14:56,146 [chanting] Loser! Loser! Loser... 317 00:14:57,396 --> 00:14:59,479 I'm not a loser. I'm not a loser. 318 00:14:59,563 --> 00:15:04,479 I'm not a loser...Not a loser. A loser. Loser. Loser. 319 00:15:04,563 --> 00:15:06,813 Hey, wake up, boy. You're having a bad dream. 320 00:15:06,896 --> 00:15:09,896 Huh?! What?! A dream?! Oh, thank goodness. 321 00:15:09,980 --> 00:15:11,980 Oh, Leonard, it was horrible. 322 00:15:12,062 --> 00:15:13,980 Everyone knew how to spell except me. 323 00:15:14,062 --> 00:15:17,062 You were a dog, and-- and not a very attractive one at that. 324 00:15:17,146 --> 00:15:19,813 Holy consonant clusters, look at the time! 325 00:15:19,896 --> 00:15:21,771 We've got to get to the bee! 326 00:15:21,855 --> 00:15:23,771 Now, remember, son, 327 00:15:23,855 --> 00:15:26,229 you're not just spelling for yourself anymore. 328 00:15:26,312 --> 00:15:28,396 You're spelling for the hopes and dreams 329 00:15:28,479 --> 00:15:30,771 of every man, woman, and child in East Westland. 330 00:15:30,855 --> 00:15:34,271 You're spelling for all the kids who don't understand 331 00:15:34,354 --> 00:15:37,479 why sometimes "o-u" sounds like "ow" as in "cloud" 332 00:15:37,563 --> 00:15:40,479 and other times sounds like "oh" as in "dough," 333 00:15:40,563 --> 00:15:43,813 and then other times it sounds like "uh" as in "tough," 334 00:15:43,896 --> 00:15:46,521 and don't even get me started on "g-h"! 335 00:15:46,604 --> 00:15:49,521 I get the idea, sir. That was very inspiring. 336 00:15:49,604 --> 00:15:52,312 Now go out there and win us a trophy 337 00:15:52,396 --> 00:15:54,646 for our sad little trophy case. 338 00:15:54,730 --> 00:15:56,563 Well, well, Crosby! 339 00:15:56,646 --> 00:15:58,604 Back for another try, eh? 340 00:15:58,688 --> 00:15:59,521 [bitterly] Hello, Nash. 341 00:16:00,771 --> 00:16:02,396 Listen, you may have a hard time 342 00:16:02,479 --> 00:16:04,229 holding onto that last-place title. 343 00:16:04,312 --> 00:16:06,396 I hear the competition is pretty stiff-- 344 00:16:06,479 --> 00:16:07,896 at the bottom this year! 345 00:16:07,980 --> 00:16:09,646 [laughs] 346 00:16:12,104 --> 00:16:16,730 Well, well, well, if it isn't my old friend Yung-Hi Mandelbaum. 347 00:16:16,813 --> 00:16:18,938 What happened? Did you change your name? 348 00:16:19,021 --> 00:16:20,604 Eric Mark. I, uh... 349 00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:22,646 Can it, Leadready-- I knew what you wanted all along. 350 00:16:22,730 --> 00:16:24,563 Do you think you're the first person 351 00:16:24,646 --> 00:16:25,813 to pretend to be my friend 352 00:16:25,896 --> 00:16:27,479 just so they could steal my spelling secrets? 353 00:16:27,563 --> 00:16:29,646 Well, actually... yeah. 354 00:16:29,730 --> 00:16:31,646 Okay, so maybe you are. So what?! 355 00:16:31,730 --> 00:16:34,646 Did you really think I'd share my precious secrets 356 00:16:34,730 --> 00:16:36,771 with a couple of yutzes off the street? 357 00:16:36,855 --> 00:16:40,646 I gave you nothing! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 358 00:16:40,730 --> 00:16:44,396 From this moment on, there is only myself and the word. 359 00:16:44,479 --> 00:16:46,730 [cheering] 360 00:16:49,813 --> 00:16:51,479 Ladies and gentlemen, 361 00:16:51,563 --> 00:16:55,146 welcome to this year's county spelling bee championship. 362 00:16:55,229 --> 00:16:58,646 Please welcome your spelling finalists. 363 00:16:58,730 --> 00:16:59,563 [cheers and applause] 364 00:17:00,604 --> 00:17:04,730 All righty, then. Let the bee begin! 365 00:17:08,479 --> 00:17:11,855 No! No! No! No! 366 00:17:11,938 --> 00:17:13,646 It's a note! 367 00:17:13,730 --> 00:17:16,062 Just one lousy meshugeneh note! 368 00:17:16,146 --> 00:17:18,479 How hard is it to hum a single note?! 369 00:17:18,563 --> 00:17:19,521 -[dings] -Can't you hear that?! 370 00:17:20,771 --> 00:17:21,688 -[dings] -I'm playing this... 371 00:17:22,604 --> 00:17:23,646 -[dongs] -And you're singing this! 372 00:17:24,104 --> 00:17:24,938 [meows] 373 00:17:26,604 --> 00:17:27,396 [dings] 374 00:17:27,730 --> 00:17:28,563 [meows] Heh heh. 375 00:17:30,021 --> 00:17:31,521 Of course! That's it! 376 00:17:31,604 --> 00:17:34,438 You're a one-note kitty, a b-flat cat. 377 00:17:34,521 --> 00:17:36,604 I'm a genius! Now we can get to work! 378 00:17:36,688 --> 00:17:39,771 You'll have your "Tiny Flugelhorn Girl" by Christmas. 379 00:17:47,396 --> 00:17:50,229 The word is "perspicacious." 380 00:17:50,312 --> 00:17:56,062 Perspicacious. P-E-R-S-P-I-C-A-C-I-O-U-S. 381 00:17:56,146 --> 00:17:57,855 Perspicacious. 382 00:17:57,938 --> 00:17:58,855 Correct. 383 00:17:58,938 --> 00:17:59,771 [cheering] 384 00:18:00,730 --> 00:18:04,146 [no audio] 385 00:18:17,146 --> 00:18:21,312 Philately. P-H-I-L-A-T-E-L-Y. 386 00:18:21,396 --> 00:18:22,521 Philately. 387 00:18:22,604 --> 00:18:24,438 That is correct! 388 00:18:24,521 --> 00:18:26,896 I can't wait till they get to the hard words. 389 00:18:26,980 --> 00:18:29,980 Neither can I, cause there's 26 letters in the alphabet, 390 00:18:30,062 --> 00:18:32,062 and I know 'em all. 391 00:18:32,146 --> 00:18:35,062 Mr. Leadready, your word is... 392 00:18:35,146 --> 00:18:36,938 "Glockenspiel." 393 00:18:37,021 --> 00:18:38,229 [nervously] Homina-homina-homina. 394 00:18:39,646 --> 00:18:41,479 Come again. 395 00:18:41,563 --> 00:18:43,438 Glockenspiel. 396 00:18:43,521 --> 00:18:46,479 Glockenspiel. Okay, let's see... 397 00:18:46,563 --> 00:18:49,187 "I before e, except after c" unless it's in German. 398 00:18:49,271 --> 00:18:51,479 Or is it Lithuanian? Oh, that can't be right! 399 00:18:51,563 --> 00:18:53,646 Do Lithuanians even have "i" in their alphabet? 400 00:18:53,730 --> 00:18:56,438 Come on, Leadready, think! 401 00:18:56,521 --> 00:18:57,354 [dings] 402 00:18:57,855 --> 00:18:58,896 [buzzes] 403 00:19:01,229 --> 00:19:02,062 [cheering] 404 00:19:03,771 --> 00:19:07,312 Way to go! Second place! That is so cool! 405 00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:11,396 Congratulations, son. You've made us all very proud. 406 00:19:11,479 --> 00:19:13,563 For the first time in history, 407 00:19:13,646 --> 00:19:16,563 we have a trophy to put in our case. 408 00:19:16,646 --> 00:19:19,396 And Leonard and I would love to take you out 409 00:19:19,479 --> 00:19:22,521 for a special second-place celebratory pizza at Mario's. 410 00:19:22,604 --> 00:19:25,354 Well, Leonard, I hope you've learned something from all this. 411 00:19:25,438 --> 00:19:26,563 Me? 412 00:19:26,646 --> 00:19:29,438 For though we may strive for perfection, that, my friend, 413 00:19:29,521 --> 00:19:31,438 is a goal as elusive as a dream... 414 00:19:31,521 --> 00:19:33,438 -But-- -And it is surely the fool 415 00:19:33,521 --> 00:19:36,271 who holds himself to an unattainable standard. 416 00:19:36,354 --> 00:19:39,563 If you'll all excuse me, I have some congratulating to do. 417 00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:41,021 Eric Mark, wait! 418 00:19:41,104 --> 00:19:42,521 What do you want? 419 00:19:42,604 --> 00:19:46,229 I-I just wanted to say congratulations, so... 420 00:19:46,312 --> 00:19:47,688 Congratulations. 421 00:19:47,771 --> 00:19:50,062 And also, I-- I wanted to apologize 422 00:19:50,146 --> 00:19:52,604 for pretending to be somebody else. 423 00:19:52,688 --> 00:19:54,021 Normally I'm very much 424 00:19:54,104 --> 00:19:57,521 a "what you see is what you get" kind of dog-- uh, kid. 425 00:19:57,604 --> 00:20:00,563 It's kind of flattering that you went to all that trouble-- 426 00:20:00,646 --> 00:20:03,229 you know, in a way-over-the-top, obsessive sort of way. 427 00:20:03,312 --> 00:20:06,479 Yeah...hey, my friend and I are going to Mario's for pizza. 428 00:20:06,563 --> 00:20:08,062 You wanna come? 429 00:20:08,146 --> 00:20:10,104 Are you saying you want to hang out with me-- 430 00:20:10,187 --> 00:20:12,479 like friends or something, no strings attached-- 431 00:20:12,563 --> 00:20:14,896 and you're not just trying to steal my spelling secrets? 432 00:20:14,980 --> 00:20:17,896 That's exactly what I'm saying, Mr. Paranoid, so how about it? 433 00:20:17,980 --> 00:20:20,980 Well, I was going to go home and start preparing for the states, 434 00:20:21,062 --> 00:20:22,479 but, ah, what the heck! 435 00:20:22,563 --> 00:20:23,980 Whoo-hoo! 436 00:20:24,062 --> 00:20:25,938 You big goofball. 437 00:20:26,021 --> 00:20:28,855 Ooh, here they come! 438 00:20:28,938 --> 00:20:30,896 Okay, now remember what we worked on. 439 00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:34,354 From the diaphragm. Round tones. Joyous sound. 440 00:20:34,438 --> 00:20:35,980 [nervously] Round tones. Joyous sounds. Got it. 441 00:20:36,646 --> 00:20:38,396 Ooh, I'm so nervous! 442 00:20:38,479 --> 00:20:42,604 Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Hoo hoo! 443 00:20:42,688 --> 00:20:43,521 [howls] 444 00:20:45,146 --> 00:20:47,271 Oh, yes, I am da man! 445 00:20:47,354 --> 00:20:49,646 Scott Leadready II rules! 446 00:20:49,730 --> 00:20:51,855 Don't tell me you actually won that spelling bee?! 447 00:20:51,938 --> 00:20:53,521 No, I lost the spelling bee, 448 00:20:53,604 --> 00:20:56,646 but I challenged Krabitz to a pizza-eating contest 449 00:20:56,730 --> 00:20:58,604 and destroyed him! 450 00:20:58,688 --> 00:21:00,604 The poor kid never had a chance. 451 00:21:00,688 --> 00:21:03,354 Oh, yeah! I'm the king, baby! Ha ha! 452 00:21:03,438 --> 00:21:06,479 He's almost as gracious in victory as he is in defeat. 453 00:21:06,563 --> 00:21:09,104 Uh, w-we have a surprise of our own. 454 00:21:09,187 --> 00:21:11,563 Now, understand, this is just a work in progress, 455 00:21:11,646 --> 00:21:14,521 but, still, I think you're gonna be pleasantly surprised. 456 00:21:14,604 --> 00:21:15,438 [glockenspiel plays] 457 00:21:16,021 --> 00:21:19,479 ♪ In the tiny town of Flugelhorn ♪ 458 00:21:19,563 --> 00:21:22,521 ♪ One shining Christmas morn ♪ 459 00:21:22,604 --> 00:21:25,479 ♪ A child received a magic gift ♪ 460 00:21:25,563 --> 00:21:28,730 ♪ A tiny golden flugelhorn ♪ 461 00:21:28,813 --> 00:21:31,855 ♪ She'd never seen a flugelhorn ♪ 462 00:21:31,938 --> 00:21:34,813 ♪ Its sound she did not know ♪ 463 00:21:34,896 --> 00:21:38,604 ♪ And yet she raised it to her lips ♪ 464 00:21:38,688 --> 00:21:41,563 ♪ And just began to blow ♪ 465 00:21:41,646 --> 00:21:44,938 ♪ With your horn so bright and bugley ♪ 466 00:21:45,021 --> 00:21:48,146 ♪ Play your song of Christmas cheer ♪ 467 00:21:48,229 --> 00:21:51,688 ♪ Make the sound so sweet and flugely ♪ 468 00:21:51,771 --> 00:21:54,646 ♪ For all Flugelites to he-e-e-ar ♪ 469 00:21:54,730 --> 00:21:55,563 [flugelhorn plays] 470 00:21:59,688 --> 00:22:02,271 Well, what do you think? 471 00:22:02,354 --> 00:22:04,396 That was lovely. Really. 472 00:22:04,479 --> 00:22:06,563 You're both to be congratulated... 473 00:22:06,646 --> 00:22:09,229 Except for one tiny, little detail-- 474 00:22:09,312 --> 00:22:13,771 I hate G-L-O-C-K-E-N-S-P-I-E-L-S!