1 00:00:00,333 --> 00:00:01,463 ♪ Born on the wrong end Of the leash ♪ 2 00:00:01,542 --> 00:00:04,252 -♪ He was a dreamer ♪ -♪ And a little schemer ♪ 3 00:00:04,333 --> 00:00:05,633 ♪ A nutty mutt living a dog's life ♪ 4 00:00:05,709 --> 00:00:07,419 ♪ But when he'd hear the bell for school ♪ 5 00:00:07,500 --> 00:00:08,330 ♪ He'd start to drool ♪ 6 00:00:08,417 --> 00:00:10,127 -♪ One day he says ♪ -♪ I'll take a chance ♪ 7 00:00:10,208 --> 00:00:11,708 ♪ Trades his leash For a pair of pants ♪ 8 00:00:11,792 --> 00:00:14,132 ♪ In a glance, school becomes His favorite pastime ♪ 9 00:00:14,208 --> 00:00:16,538 ♪ I have buried a bone For the last time ♪ 10 00:00:16,625 --> 00:00:18,285 -♪ He says ♪ -♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 11 00:00:18,375 --> 00:00:19,625 ♪ Ooh, he's bad ♪ 12 00:00:19,709 --> 00:00:21,169 ♪ He's so over just being rover ♪ 13 00:00:21,250 --> 00:00:22,580 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 14 00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:25,167 ♪ He says he's just gonna be a boy ♪ 15 00:00:25,250 --> 00:00:26,670 ♪ Turns out he's a regular Einstein ♪ 16 00:00:26,750 --> 00:00:28,670 ♪ And Leonard is treading a fine line ♪ 17 00:00:28,750 --> 00:00:30,920 Why can't I be a normal kid like any other? 18 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:33,420 Now, doodle bug, listen to mother. 19 00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:35,040 ♪ I want to be a boy ♪ 20 00:00:35,125 --> 00:00:36,705 I hate dogs. 21 00:00:36,792 --> 00:00:39,672 ♪ I gotta be a boy ♪ 22 00:00:39,750 --> 00:00:41,420 ♪ This power pup's gonna be a boy ♪ 23 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:43,420 I do not wish to be a dog. 24 00:00:43,500 --> 00:00:46,080 ♪ Now this bowser's ready for trousers ♪ 25 00:00:46,166 --> 00:00:47,456 ♪ I got to be a boy ♪ 26 00:00:47,542 --> 00:00:49,082 ♪ His nose is wet but you can bet ♪ 27 00:00:49,166 --> 00:00:52,206 ♪ This teacher's pet is gonna be a boy ♪ 28 00:00:52,291 --> 00:00:54,131 Yes! 29 00:01:10,041 --> 00:01:11,631 Good morning, students. 30 00:01:11,709 --> 00:01:14,459 I have an inordinately exciting announcement for you all today. 31 00:01:14,542 --> 00:01:16,792 Are they closing the school because of an asbestos scare? 32 00:01:16,875 --> 00:01:18,575 No, better than that. 33 00:01:18,667 --> 00:01:21,667 Today marks the beginning of the president of the senate's 34 00:01:21,750 --> 00:01:24,000 "National Reading is Good For You" month. 35 00:01:24,083 --> 00:01:25,673 [coughs] 36 00:01:25,750 --> 00:01:27,000 Now I know what you're thinking. 37 00:01:27,083 --> 00:01:29,253 Who wants to devote an entire month to reading? 38 00:01:29,333 --> 00:01:30,673 Who cares if our student body 39 00:01:30,750 --> 00:01:32,290 outperforms the rest of the state? 40 00:01:32,375 --> 00:01:34,995 I don't want our school to win new playground equipment. 41 00:01:35,083 --> 00:01:36,793 Playground equipment? 42 00:01:36,875 --> 00:01:38,495 You heard that right! 43 00:01:38,583 --> 00:01:41,043 The board of education has promised me 44 00:01:41,125 --> 00:01:44,125 that if you better the state average of 1,000 books read 45 00:01:44,208 --> 00:01:47,918 and 1,000 book reports written by the end of the month, 46 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:51,830 we will get a new four-square court. 47 00:01:51,917 --> 00:01:53,917 [all] Yay! 48 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:57,580 In fact, I'll bet you can read 1,500 books 49 00:01:57,667 --> 00:02:00,747 and get a new curvy sliding board 50 00:02:00,834 --> 00:02:05,174 with cut-in-half truck tires and chain-ladder thingy. 51 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:06,500 [all] Yeah! 52 00:02:06,583 --> 00:02:07,923 [chanting] Read, read! 53 00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:13,080 I even bet you could read 2,000 books this month! 54 00:02:13,166 --> 00:02:14,876 [girl] No! No we can't! 55 00:02:14,959 --> 00:02:16,789 Yes, you can! I believe in you. 56 00:02:16,875 --> 00:02:18,285 And if we do this together, 57 00:02:18,417 --> 00:02:20,997 if the school reads and writes reports on 2,000 books-- 58 00:02:21,083 --> 00:02:24,043 What do we get then? A working roller coaster? 59 00:02:24,125 --> 00:02:26,245 No, I'm afraid the board of education 60 00:02:26,333 --> 00:02:28,883 can't budget anything over the tire-slide deal. 61 00:02:28,959 --> 00:02:30,959 [all] Aw, man! 62 00:02:31,041 --> 00:02:35,131 But just to show I'm in this with you, 63 00:02:35,208 --> 00:02:37,168 if you can do it, 64 00:02:37,250 --> 00:02:40,710 I-I will shave my very own head. 65 00:02:40,792 --> 00:02:42,292 Meow! 66 00:02:42,375 --> 00:02:44,125 [all] Yeah! 67 00:02:44,208 --> 00:02:47,958 And not only that, I will paint said bald head... 68 00:02:48,041 --> 00:02:49,291 Purple! 69 00:02:49,375 --> 00:02:50,705 [all] Yeah! 70 00:02:50,792 --> 00:02:53,082 [all chanting] Strickler, Strickler, Strickler! 71 00:02:53,166 --> 00:02:55,576 [thinking] Look at them, Cubby. They love you. 72 00:02:55,667 --> 00:02:59,247 Yep, you are some kind of great principal. 73 00:02:59,333 --> 00:03:01,963 Got a little carried away at the end there, but no harm. 74 00:03:02,041 --> 00:03:04,711 You won't have to shave your head and paint it purple. 75 00:03:04,792 --> 00:03:06,132 [Scott] Excuse me, sir! 76 00:03:06,208 --> 00:03:07,918 Yes? Who is that? 77 00:03:08,041 --> 00:03:10,751 Scott Leadready. 78 00:03:10,834 --> 00:03:13,674 Sir, I applaud you on your bold challenge. 79 00:03:13,750 --> 00:03:17,130 I will ensure your reading challenge is not only met, 80 00:03:17,208 --> 00:03:18,538 nay, but far surpassed. 81 00:03:18,625 --> 00:03:21,455 Even if I have to read every other book myself. 82 00:03:21,542 --> 00:03:22,922 [audience gasps] 83 00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:24,920 That's nice. 84 00:03:29,333 --> 00:03:32,293 That was some promise you made in front of the whole school. 85 00:03:32,375 --> 00:03:33,535 I was really impressed. 86 00:03:33,625 --> 00:03:35,035 I'm glad somebody was. 87 00:03:35,125 --> 00:03:37,375 Can you believe that ungrateful principal? 88 00:03:37,458 --> 00:03:40,128 I vow to make this school a champion, 89 00:03:40,208 --> 00:03:41,998 soaring to heights of hyperbole 90 00:03:42,083 --> 00:03:44,673 ridiculous even by my own standards, 91 00:03:44,750 --> 00:03:46,500 and I all I get is, "that's nice." 92 00:03:46,583 --> 00:03:49,423 Sometimes I think the man doesn't even know my name. 93 00:03:49,500 --> 00:03:51,130 Scott Leadready. Scott Leadready! 94 00:03:51,208 --> 00:03:52,958 How could I forget him? 95 00:03:53,041 --> 00:03:56,631 Scott Leadready will probably read 2,000 books on his own! 96 00:03:56,709 --> 00:03:59,379 Where does that kid get off being so smart? 97 00:04:00,542 --> 00:04:01,252 Aah! 98 00:04:01,333 --> 00:04:03,083 [yowls] 99 00:04:04,875 --> 00:04:06,745 Scott, how would you like to be 100 00:04:06,834 --> 00:04:08,834 my Special Junior-Deputy Vice-Principal 101 00:04:08,917 --> 00:04:12,327 in charge of reading and reporting motivational affairs? 102 00:04:12,417 --> 00:04:13,827 Me? 103 00:04:13,917 --> 00:04:16,627 I want you to stay close by my side throughout the month, 104 00:04:16,709 --> 00:04:19,289 keep the library functioning at tip-top speed, 105 00:04:19,375 --> 00:04:22,125 and tally the reading output of your fellow students. 106 00:04:22,208 --> 00:04:25,828 It's a very important and time-consuming position. 107 00:04:25,917 --> 00:04:27,327 Are you with me? 108 00:04:27,417 --> 00:04:30,497 Oh, sir, I'm overwhelmed. It's such an honor to -- 109 00:04:30,583 --> 00:04:33,883 do I get a special name badge for my shirt? 110 00:04:33,959 --> 00:04:35,459 Covered in plastic. 111 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:37,252 Then the answer is yes! 112 00:04:37,333 --> 00:04:41,213 You and me together! All for one and one for all! 113 00:04:41,291 --> 00:04:45,501 Just like "The Three Musketeers" by Alexander Dumas Père. 114 00:04:45,583 --> 00:04:47,543 He's the author whose collected works 115 00:04:47,625 --> 00:04:49,535 I'm going to read and report on tonight. 116 00:04:49,625 --> 00:04:50,955 Good. 117 00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:52,461 Uh, you can read this later. 118 00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:54,502 Right now I've got some important forms 119 00:04:54,583 --> 00:04:56,423 I want you to fill out. 120 00:04:56,500 --> 00:04:57,580 Triplicate?! Pinch me! 121 00:04:57,667 --> 00:05:01,077 You won't regret giving me this job, sir. 122 00:05:01,166 --> 00:05:03,576 I know I won't. 123 00:05:03,667 --> 00:05:06,457 Fellow bibliophiles... 124 00:05:06,542 --> 00:05:10,172 I present to you the Fala D. Roosevelt Elementary 125 00:05:10,250 --> 00:05:14,420 reading and reporting challenge progress thermometer. 126 00:05:16,875 --> 00:05:19,325 "Why a thermometer?" You may ask. 127 00:05:19,417 --> 00:05:22,127 Because, my friends, reading is like a virus 128 00:05:22,208 --> 00:05:25,378 that infects you with the high fever of learning, 129 00:05:25,458 --> 00:05:27,998 accompanied by the cotton mouth of accomplishment 130 00:05:28,083 --> 00:05:30,083 and the occasional intestinal distress -- 131 00:05:30,166 --> 00:05:32,826 [burps] 132 00:05:34,208 --> 00:05:36,378 Well, let's get on with it, huh? 133 00:05:36,458 --> 00:05:39,328 Has everyone read and reported on their three books for today? 134 00:05:39,417 --> 00:05:40,497 [all] Yeah! 135 00:05:42,667 --> 00:05:44,457 [bell dings] 136 00:05:44,542 --> 00:05:46,292 [all] Yeah! Whoo! 137 00:05:46,375 --> 00:05:50,165 And, Scott, I'm sure you have at least six book reports. 138 00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:51,580 Uh, not quite. 139 00:05:51,667 --> 00:05:53,917 I was up all night building the thermometer. 140 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:56,130 I only had time to read one book. 141 00:05:56,208 --> 00:05:58,458 "How to build a giant thermometer." 142 00:05:58,542 --> 00:06:01,462 Well, that's all right. I'm sure you'll read more. 143 00:06:01,542 --> 00:06:04,462 Don't forget-- we can't do it without you. 144 00:06:04,542 --> 00:06:06,382 And read and write I shall! 145 00:06:06,458 --> 00:06:07,708 [all] Yeah! 146 00:06:07,792 --> 00:06:10,672 Just as soon I read your reports 147 00:06:10,750 --> 00:06:14,380 and write my reports on your reports. 148 00:06:17,041 --> 00:06:20,461 Ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! 149 00:06:20,542 --> 00:06:22,672 [bell dinging] 150 00:06:27,291 --> 00:06:29,461 [whistling] 151 00:06:40,834 --> 00:06:42,634 [maniacal laughter] 152 00:06:43,709 --> 00:06:45,169 [bell dings] 153 00:07:00,291 --> 00:07:04,171 Here-- number 1,500! 154 00:07:04,250 --> 00:07:09,630 "My first little big lots-of-fun pop-up book"! 155 00:07:09,709 --> 00:07:12,749 We got a new sliding board! 156 00:07:12,834 --> 00:07:15,424 And a biohazard team. 157 00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:17,500 Congratulations, students. 158 00:07:17,583 --> 00:07:19,003 And kudos to my protégé, 159 00:07:19,083 --> 00:07:21,883 Special Junior Vice-Principal Scott Leadready, 160 00:07:21,959 --> 00:07:23,499 for his exemplary work. 161 00:07:23,583 --> 00:07:24,583 Thank you. 162 00:07:24,667 --> 00:07:26,827 And now on to the next step. 163 00:07:26,917 --> 00:07:30,667 We have four days left to get to 2,000 books. 164 00:07:30,750 --> 00:07:32,540 Are we gonna do it? 165 00:07:32,625 --> 00:07:35,875 [all] Sure. I guess so. Yeah. 166 00:07:35,959 --> 00:07:38,669 Not as lusty as I'd like, but I'll take it. 167 00:07:38,750 --> 00:07:40,880 Keep up the good work, folks. 168 00:07:40,959 --> 00:07:42,669 [all] Whoo. Yeah. Yay. Whoo. 169 00:07:44,542 --> 00:07:47,832 [bell rings] 170 00:07:52,417 --> 00:07:54,077 Well, well, well. 171 00:07:54,166 --> 00:07:58,126 If it isn't junior-deputy snake-in-the-grass 172 00:07:58,208 --> 00:07:59,748 Scott Seadready. 173 00:07:59,834 --> 00:08:02,384 Hey, easy on the suit. I just had it cleaned. 174 00:08:02,458 --> 00:08:04,578 You promised you would help us reach our goal, 175 00:08:04,667 --> 00:08:05,997 and you let us down. 176 00:08:06,083 --> 00:08:07,833 [all] Yeah. 177 00:08:07,917 --> 00:08:10,167 But I have been keeping my promise. 178 00:08:10,250 --> 00:08:13,130 I organized the library, counted the reports, 179 00:08:13,208 --> 00:08:15,538 and don't forget my thermometer. 180 00:08:15,625 --> 00:08:17,575 It looks just like the one in the book. 181 00:08:17,667 --> 00:08:20,997 Yeah, and that's the only book you've read all month, Scott. 182 00:08:21,083 --> 00:08:23,753 Look, Scott, we know your heart's in the right place, 183 00:08:23,834 --> 00:08:25,794 but you're so buddy-buddy with Strickler now 184 00:08:25,875 --> 00:08:27,955 that you don't realize the truth. 185 00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:30,081 He gave you that job to stop you from reading 186 00:08:30,166 --> 00:08:33,036 so he wouldn't have to shave his head and paint it purple. 187 00:08:33,166 --> 00:08:34,576 No! No, you're lying! 188 00:08:34,667 --> 00:08:38,457 Our principal is a great man who wants his students to excel, 189 00:08:38,542 --> 00:08:42,542 and I am absolutely, positively not too buddy-buddy with Cubby. 190 00:08:42,625 --> 00:08:44,455 I mean, Crosby. 191 00:08:44,542 --> 00:08:45,632 I mean -- 192 00:08:45,709 --> 00:08:47,129 oh... 193 00:08:47,208 --> 00:08:49,788 I just can't believe it's true. 194 00:08:49,875 --> 00:08:52,325 There's only one way to find out. 195 00:08:52,417 --> 00:08:53,747 That's preposterous! 196 00:08:53,834 --> 00:08:57,924 I want my students to read and read plenty of books. 197 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,380 Just not 2,000 books. 198 00:09:00,458 --> 00:09:01,748 I'm weak! 199 00:09:01,834 --> 00:09:03,174 Forgive me! 200 00:09:03,250 --> 00:09:06,080 I want my students to learn. I just don't want a purple head. 201 00:09:06,166 --> 00:09:07,706 Is that so bad? 202 00:09:07,792 --> 00:09:09,212 [sobbing] 203 00:09:09,291 --> 00:09:11,831 Oh, stop. Look at yourself. 204 00:09:11,917 --> 00:09:13,957 This isn't the Cubby I know. 205 00:09:14,041 --> 00:09:15,961 [crying] 206 00:09:16,041 --> 00:09:19,461 A guy like me can't change! 207 00:09:19,542 --> 00:09:22,672 I'm a bad man! 208 00:09:22,750 --> 00:09:24,630 Now stop that! 209 00:09:24,709 --> 00:09:25,789 You're not a bad man! 210 00:09:25,875 --> 00:09:28,825 You're a... moderately good man 211 00:09:28,917 --> 00:09:30,707 and a good principal. 212 00:09:30,792 --> 00:09:33,962 You got this entire school excited about reading, and why? 213 00:09:34,041 --> 00:09:35,881 Because you made a promise, 214 00:09:35,959 --> 00:09:37,709 and you said we were in this together. 215 00:09:37,792 --> 00:09:39,042 Well, we still are. 216 00:09:39,125 --> 00:09:41,625 The students have lived up to their promise, 217 00:09:41,709 --> 00:09:43,959 and now you have to live up to yours. 218 00:09:44,041 --> 00:09:45,541 Now, if you'll excuse me, 219 00:09:45,625 --> 00:09:48,915 there's a locker full of unread books waiting for me. 220 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:50,080 [glass shatters] 221 00:09:50,166 --> 00:09:51,536 Heh heh heh. 222 00:09:53,083 --> 00:09:57,133 287 books in one night? 223 00:09:59,709 --> 00:10:03,039 "Oliver Twist" by Charles Dickens is a classic... 224 00:10:03,125 --> 00:10:06,125 "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" by Mark Twain 225 00:10:06,208 --> 00:10:08,328 is a great American novel... 226 00:10:08,417 --> 00:10:12,497 "10,001 Frog Names" is a mordantly witty treatise... 227 00:10:12,583 --> 00:10:14,793 [snoring] 228 00:10:21,083 --> 00:10:23,583 [all] 1,997... 229 00:10:23,667 --> 00:10:25,827 1,998... 230 00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:28,247 1,999! 231 00:10:28,333 --> 00:10:29,833 [all gasp] 232 00:10:29,917 --> 00:10:32,497 1,999?! 233 00:10:32,583 --> 00:10:34,543 That's impossible! 234 00:10:34,625 --> 00:10:37,495 I read exactly 287 books last night. 235 00:10:37,583 --> 00:10:40,793 I checked the thermometer before I -- 236 00:10:40,875 --> 00:10:42,705 [gasps] Strickler! 237 00:10:49,208 --> 00:10:51,378 Heh heh heh heh heh! 238 00:10:51,458 --> 00:10:52,628 I failed you twice. 239 00:10:52,709 --> 00:10:55,669 Once be being suckered in by our principal, 240 00:10:55,750 --> 00:10:57,330 and again by thinking 241 00:10:57,417 --> 00:11:00,287 I had shown him the way to redemption. 242 00:11:00,375 --> 00:11:01,455 Oh! 243 00:11:01,542 --> 00:11:03,042 And there's only 20 seconds left. 244 00:11:03,125 --> 00:11:04,625 There's no way we can come up 245 00:11:04,709 --> 00:11:06,209 with another book report by then. 246 00:11:06,291 --> 00:11:07,791 Yes, we can! 247 00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:10,632 Cubby, you did it! 248 00:11:10,709 --> 00:11:13,249 You searched your soul! 249 00:11:18,917 --> 00:11:20,537 [alarm rings] 250 00:11:20,625 --> 00:11:22,035 We did it! 251 00:11:22,125 --> 00:11:23,875 [cheering] 252 00:11:26,625 --> 00:11:28,205 [buzzing] 253 00:11:31,834 --> 00:11:33,504 Aah! 254 00:11:47,667 --> 00:11:50,707 [cartoon sound effects playing] 255 00:11:50,792 --> 00:11:53,672 [laughter] 256 00:11:56,166 --> 00:11:57,916 [laughter] 257 00:11:58,000 --> 00:11:59,420 Honey-poo... 258 00:11:59,500 --> 00:12:02,580 Haven't you seen this one about nine times? 259 00:12:02,667 --> 00:12:05,247 Oh, well, I just wanted to let you know the mail came. 260 00:12:05,333 --> 00:12:07,463 The new slicker edge catalog is here. 261 00:12:08,625 --> 00:12:12,495 The slicker edge catalog! Oh, boy! Oh, boy! 262 00:12:12,583 --> 00:12:14,673 I wonder what kind of slicker and edgier things 263 00:12:14,750 --> 00:12:15,790 they have this month. 264 00:12:15,875 --> 00:12:18,665 Robobark, the automated attack dog, 265 00:12:18,750 --> 00:12:21,790 a solar-powered outdoor icemaker and barbecue set. 266 00:12:21,875 --> 00:12:24,075 Oh, wow! 267 00:12:24,166 --> 00:12:26,576 Mom, check it out! 268 00:12:26,667 --> 00:12:29,457 Steel Saber. 269 00:12:29,542 --> 00:12:31,582 Why that's just a little old put-put scooter. 270 00:12:31,667 --> 00:12:33,997 What is so slick and edgy about that? 271 00:12:34,083 --> 00:12:36,083 The Steel Saber is aerodynamically designed 272 00:12:36,166 --> 00:12:37,876 to go faster than the skateboard. 273 00:12:37,959 --> 00:12:39,129 [coughing] 274 00:12:39,208 --> 00:12:42,828 It's b-1 shocks can take moguls better than a mountain bike. 275 00:12:42,917 --> 00:12:45,917 Wheels and handlebars come in five hot-florescent colors. 276 00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:48,710 And the whole ride folds up to fit in your backpack. 277 00:12:48,792 --> 00:12:50,832 That's what's so slick and edgy about it. 278 00:12:50,917 --> 00:12:52,287 Please, mom? Please? 279 00:12:52,375 --> 00:12:54,665 Can I get it? Huh? Can I? 280 00:12:54,750 --> 00:12:57,380 Well, heck in a handbag. I had no idea. 281 00:12:57,458 --> 00:12:59,498 I suppose I could buy one for you. 282 00:12:59,583 --> 00:13:00,753 Yeah! All right! 283 00:13:00,834 --> 00:13:04,584 But, you know, it would be ever so much more meaningful 284 00:13:04,667 --> 00:13:06,877 if you earned the money yourself. 285 00:13:06,959 --> 00:13:08,999 Aah! 286 00:13:09,083 --> 00:13:10,923 I'll never be able to do that. 287 00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:13,080 Oh, don't be a "can't do," Lenny. 288 00:13:13,166 --> 00:13:14,326 Be a "can do." 289 00:13:14,417 --> 00:13:15,627 When I was a little girl, 290 00:13:15,709 --> 00:13:17,249 there was something I wanted more than anything 291 00:13:17,333 --> 00:13:18,463 in the whole wide world, 292 00:13:18,542 --> 00:13:21,542 a "Little Miss Big Girl Mommy's Helper Cookie Baker Oven." 293 00:13:21,625 --> 00:13:23,455 Oh, please, Mommy! Please? 294 00:13:23,542 --> 00:13:24,792 If I don't get 295 00:13:24,792 --> 00:13:27,582 a Little Miss Big Girl Mommy's Helper Cookie Baker Oven, 296 00:13:27,667 --> 00:13:30,167 I'll never grow up to be a responsible and loving 297 00:13:30,250 --> 00:13:31,330 wife and mother. 298 00:13:31,417 --> 00:13:33,327 At least that's what the commercial says. 299 00:13:33,417 --> 00:13:35,377 Okey-dokey artichokey, young lady. 300 00:13:35,458 --> 00:13:37,378 You earn the money, and it's yours. 301 00:13:37,458 --> 00:13:39,378 But how? Oh, I'll never-- 302 00:13:39,458 --> 00:13:41,708 now don't be a "can't do," Mary Lou. 303 00:13:41,792 --> 00:13:45,002 Just put on your thinking cap and figure out how you can. 304 00:13:45,083 --> 00:13:47,923 So I put on my thinking cap-- hello!-- 305 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:49,670 which for me was a lovely rhinestone tiara 306 00:13:49,750 --> 00:13:51,210 I had earned by saving 307 00:13:51,291 --> 00:13:53,671 three books worth of trading stamps. 308 00:13:53,750 --> 00:13:55,710 Ha ha! Oh, but that's another story -- 309 00:13:55,792 --> 00:13:58,382 and hatched a superific plan. 310 00:13:58,417 --> 00:14:00,167 My future was coming up lemons. 311 00:14:00,250 --> 00:14:03,000 And a mere six months later, viola! 312 00:14:03,083 --> 00:14:05,923 I had earned enough for the oven. 313 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:09,380 It was the greatest day of my 10-year-old life. 314 00:14:09,458 --> 00:14:11,288 So, go sell your lemonade. 315 00:14:11,375 --> 00:14:13,705 And if you earn the money for the scooter, 316 00:14:13,792 --> 00:14:16,082 I'll pop for the matching helmet and kneepads. 317 00:14:16,166 --> 00:14:17,246 Then you'll be stylin' in safety. 318 00:14:17,333 --> 00:14:19,583 Hoo-ha! Ha ha ha ha! 319 00:14:19,667 --> 00:14:22,707 I hate when she tries to be slick and edgy. 320 00:14:22,792 --> 00:14:26,082 Yeah, it just makes her look stiff and stodgy. 321 00:14:26,166 --> 00:14:27,456 This is so great! 322 00:14:27,542 --> 00:14:29,922 Sell some lemonade, buy a scooter. 323 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:32,710 The elegance of its simplicity makes one wonder 324 00:14:32,792 --> 00:14:37,042 why no one ever thought of it before. 325 00:14:37,458 --> 00:14:39,708 Lemonade! Come and get your lemonade! 326 00:14:39,792 --> 00:14:40,792 Scooter or bust! 327 00:14:40,875 --> 00:14:43,035 So sour your lips will sting! 328 00:14:43,125 --> 00:14:44,325 We've got pulp! 329 00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:45,577 Scooter or bust! 330 00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:48,167 Shoot! There goes that great plan. 331 00:14:48,291 --> 00:14:50,421 Now I'll never get my scooter. 332 00:14:50,542 --> 00:14:52,132 Hey, where are you going? 333 00:14:52,208 --> 00:14:55,878 I'm gonna drown my sorrow in a big glass of chocolate milk. 334 00:14:57,875 --> 00:15:00,745 Mother of invention, thy name is Leonard! 335 00:15:02,834 --> 00:15:04,634 But, of course, chocolate! 336 00:15:04,709 --> 00:15:07,539 The same elixir that was served to emperors and gods 337 00:15:07,625 --> 00:15:08,665 in the new world. 338 00:15:08,750 --> 00:15:10,790 Considered a great delicacy by the Aztecs. 339 00:15:10,875 --> 00:15:12,415 A favorite of Montezuma. 340 00:15:12,500 --> 00:15:15,130 Of course, it's poison to dogs, but they're not our clientele. 341 00:15:15,208 --> 00:15:16,248 Follow me! 342 00:15:16,333 --> 00:15:19,583 So we've got chocolate, hazelnut, ice, 343 00:15:19,667 --> 00:15:23,457 a little sugar, egg white for protein, cinnamon, 344 00:15:23,542 --> 00:15:25,382 all blended and frothed. 345 00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:27,248 And voilà! 346 00:15:27,333 --> 00:15:31,793 A fresh 'n' frozey chocolaccino! 347 00:15:36,208 --> 00:15:38,208 We're gonna be rich! 348 00:15:43,792 --> 00:15:44,922 Hey, guys. 349 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,250 What are you selling? 350 00:15:46,375 --> 00:15:47,535 Oh, nothing. 351 00:15:47,625 --> 00:15:49,785 Just the one and only, truly original, 352 00:15:49,875 --> 00:15:52,205 blended-chocolate drink of the gods. 353 00:15:57,458 --> 00:15:58,538 Ahh! 354 00:15:58,667 --> 00:15:59,747 Oh, my goodness! 355 00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:02,964 That's the most delicious thing I've ever tasted! 356 00:16:03,083 --> 00:16:04,213 Can I have some more? 357 00:16:04,333 --> 00:16:05,333 Sure you can. 358 00:16:05,458 --> 00:16:06,918 50 cents for regular, 75 for large, 359 00:16:07,041 --> 00:16:09,211 and a dollar for our multi grande grande 360 00:16:09,291 --> 00:16:11,001 in a frosted recyclable plastic cup. 361 00:16:11,125 --> 00:16:13,625 Okay, let me go get some money out of my jar, 362 00:16:13,709 --> 00:16:15,039 and I'll be right back. 363 00:16:15,125 --> 00:16:17,915 It's gonna dip into my scooter fund, but it's worth it. 364 00:16:18,041 --> 00:16:19,421 Hey, everyone! 365 00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:21,460 You've got to taste Leonard and Scott's 366 00:16:21,542 --> 00:16:23,672 fresh 'n' frozey chocolaccinos! They're so yummy! 367 00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:25,040 Hey, I was here first. 368 00:16:25,125 --> 00:16:27,075 This is way better than lemonade! 369 00:16:27,166 --> 00:16:28,826 Oh, gosh! This is delicious! 370 00:16:28,917 --> 00:16:30,247 I'll take two regulars. 371 00:16:30,333 --> 00:16:31,963 Oh, gosh! Extra foam! 372 00:16:32,041 --> 00:16:34,081 I want one! Extra multi grande! 373 00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:42,462 Whoo-hoo-hoo! 374 00:16:42,542 --> 00:16:43,582 Look at this. 375 00:16:43,667 --> 00:16:46,747 We're on a rocket sled to scooter town. 376 00:16:49,375 --> 00:16:50,575 Uh-oh! 377 00:16:50,709 --> 00:16:52,579 We're almost out of everything except ice. 378 00:16:52,709 --> 00:16:56,289 We better close the stand and go buy more ingredients. 379 00:16:56,417 --> 00:16:59,077 Close the stand with customers waiting in line? 380 00:16:59,208 --> 00:17:01,248 Why, that's downright un-American! 381 00:17:01,375 --> 00:17:03,075 I'd like two chocolaccinos, please. 382 00:17:03,166 --> 00:17:03,996 Me, too. 383 00:17:04,083 --> 00:17:05,713 Excuse us for a moment. 384 00:17:07,458 --> 00:17:10,708 Listen -- we've got the public clamoring for our product. 385 00:17:10,834 --> 00:17:13,044 If we shut down now, we risk losing them. 386 00:17:13,166 --> 00:17:14,786 And then we'll never get our scooter. 387 00:17:14,917 --> 00:17:16,207 Our scooter? 388 00:17:16,291 --> 00:17:17,961 I thought it was my scooter. 389 00:17:18,083 --> 00:17:21,753 And what am I supposed to do, pull you around by my leash? 390 00:17:21,834 --> 00:17:24,294 That sounds like fun. 391 00:17:24,417 --> 00:17:25,787 Yeah, well, forget it. 392 00:17:25,875 --> 00:17:29,125 What do I look like, Yukon Spot the mush dog? 393 00:17:29,250 --> 00:17:31,880 Hey, are you guys selling chocolaccinos or what? 394 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:35,540 Be right with you, sir. Service is my middle name. 395 00:17:35,667 --> 00:17:37,077 It is, really. 396 00:17:37,208 --> 00:17:40,628 What to do -- must think. 397 00:17:43,750 --> 00:17:45,880 Light bulb -- I've got the answer! 398 00:17:45,959 --> 00:17:48,079 Close down the stand, take our profits, 399 00:17:48,208 --> 00:17:49,828 and go buy some more supplies? 400 00:17:49,959 --> 00:17:51,749 No, we'll use our Yankee ingenuity 401 00:17:51,875 --> 00:17:53,205 and make do with what we got. 402 00:17:53,291 --> 00:17:55,421 We'll double the price! 403 00:17:55,542 --> 00:17:57,252 You can't serve these people ice. 404 00:17:57,375 --> 00:17:59,075 Watch me. 405 00:17:59,208 --> 00:18:00,668 Ladies and gentlemen, 406 00:18:00,750 --> 00:18:04,170 I know you came here and waited all this time in a big long line 407 00:18:04,291 --> 00:18:07,211 just so you could purchase a calorie-laden, caffeinated, 408 00:18:07,291 --> 00:18:08,671 disgustingly sweet drink 409 00:18:08,792 --> 00:18:11,542 that would lay on your stomach like a bucket of lard, 410 00:18:11,667 --> 00:18:14,207 clog your veins, and add inches to your already ample hips. 411 00:18:14,333 --> 00:18:17,833 Instead may I entice you to be among the first to try 412 00:18:17,959 --> 00:18:21,499 our brand-new-and-improved, revolutionary, incredible, 413 00:18:21,625 --> 00:18:24,455 zero-calorie diet iceaccino light. 414 00:18:24,583 --> 00:18:27,333 And what's more, it provides over 50 percent 415 00:18:27,417 --> 00:18:29,497 of your minimum daily water requirements. 416 00:18:29,625 --> 00:18:32,785 And as you know, our bodies are 98 percent water. 417 00:18:32,875 --> 00:18:36,075 So 50 percent of 98 percent -- well, you do the math. 418 00:18:36,208 --> 00:18:37,498 You body'll thank you for it! 419 00:18:37,625 --> 00:18:39,825 Step up now while supplies last. 420 00:18:41,417 --> 00:18:43,037 Wow, they're actually happy. 421 00:18:43,166 --> 00:18:45,536 Happy is my middle name. 422 00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:47,327 I thought you told that guy it was service. 423 00:18:47,417 --> 00:18:51,497 It is -- Scott Happy Service Leadready II. 424 00:18:56,208 --> 00:18:57,328 What did I tell you? 425 00:18:57,417 --> 00:19:00,077 It's like taking chew toys from a puppy. 426 00:19:00,166 --> 00:19:01,746 There you go. Enjoy. 427 00:19:01,834 --> 00:19:04,754 Bottoms up, salud, le'Chaim and all that good stuff. 428 00:19:04,875 --> 00:19:07,205 Whoo-hoo! Look at all this money! 429 00:19:07,333 --> 00:19:08,793 You were so totally right! 430 00:19:08,917 --> 00:19:10,667 I'll bet we have enough for two scooters, 431 00:19:10,750 --> 00:19:12,750 and it only took us a day. 432 00:19:12,834 --> 00:19:15,044 You are the greatest businessman ever! 433 00:19:15,166 --> 00:19:17,166 And do you know why, Leonard? 434 00:19:17,250 --> 00:19:19,880 No, but I have a feeling you're gonna tell me. 435 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:22,790 Because I embody the entrepreneurial spirit 436 00:19:22,917 --> 00:19:24,787 that makes the free market soar! 437 00:19:24,917 --> 00:19:26,377 You mean sell them lousy product 438 00:19:26,500 --> 00:19:28,880 because they're not smart enough to notice the difference. 439 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:31,460 As entrepreneur extraordinaire P.T. Barnum 440 00:19:31,583 --> 00:19:33,923 is incorrectly supposed to have said, 441 00:19:34,041 --> 00:19:36,001 "there's a sucker born every minute." 442 00:19:36,125 --> 00:19:37,495 Hey, I want my money back! 443 00:19:37,625 --> 00:19:38,665 Why? 444 00:19:38,750 --> 00:19:40,170 Because I don't like this stuff! 445 00:19:40,291 --> 00:19:41,381 Why not? 446 00:19:41,500 --> 00:19:43,460 Because it's all ice and no "cino." 447 00:19:43,583 --> 00:19:45,713 He's right. I can make this at home! 448 00:19:45,834 --> 00:19:46,714 We've been ripped off! 449 00:19:46,834 --> 00:19:49,044 Whoa! Look at the time. I'm sorry. We're closed. 450 00:19:49,166 --> 00:19:50,496 Come back tomorrow. 451 00:19:50,625 --> 00:19:51,495 Oh, no, you don't! 452 00:19:51,625 --> 00:19:54,575 You boys aren't going anywhere until you refund all our money! 453 00:19:54,667 --> 00:19:57,327 Of course, we aren't. Leonard, what were you thinking? 454 00:19:57,417 --> 00:19:59,077 Give the nice people their money back. 455 00:20:03,583 --> 00:20:05,543 How much did you make? 456 00:20:05,625 --> 00:20:07,125 17 bucks. 457 00:20:07,250 --> 00:20:09,330 Hey, come on, bunky. Buck up. 458 00:20:09,417 --> 00:20:12,537 We'll just open up tomorrow with fresh ingredients 459 00:20:12,625 --> 00:20:15,575 and get those scooters in no time flat. 460 00:20:15,709 --> 00:20:18,919 Are you kidding? Our reputations are shot. 461 00:20:19,041 --> 00:20:22,711 No one will ever buy another blended drink from us again. 462 00:20:22,834 --> 00:20:24,634 Didn't you hear what they were calling us? 463 00:20:24,750 --> 00:20:25,920 Yes, I did. 464 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,830 And I have to say I thought Scott Lie-ready II 465 00:20:28,917 --> 00:20:31,747 and Leonard help-yourself-to-our-money-man 466 00:20:31,834 --> 00:20:33,384 were a little over the top. 467 00:20:33,458 --> 00:20:36,668 If only there were some way to regain their trust. 468 00:20:36,792 --> 00:20:38,422 Wait a minute! 469 00:20:38,542 --> 00:20:40,252 Light bulb! 470 00:20:40,375 --> 00:20:42,575 On, no! Not another light bulb! 471 00:20:42,709 --> 00:20:45,749 Yes, and this one's twice as incandescent, wattage-laden, 472 00:20:45,834 --> 00:20:48,084 and energy-efficient as the last one. 473 00:20:48,208 --> 00:20:52,498 And it powers a very clever little product. 474 00:20:52,583 --> 00:20:54,673 Get your free cookies! 475 00:20:54,792 --> 00:20:56,882 Fresh and hot from the original 476 00:20:56,959 --> 00:20:59,959 Little Miss Big Girl Mommy's Helper Cookie Baker Oven! 477 00:21:00,083 --> 00:21:02,043 That's right, folks. 478 00:21:02,125 --> 00:21:03,825 I said, "free." 479 00:21:04,625 --> 00:21:05,575 It's still warm. 480 00:21:05,709 --> 00:21:07,249 Just like when I was a kid. 481 00:21:07,375 --> 00:21:08,825 And they're free. 482 00:21:08,917 --> 00:21:11,077 You guys are great! 483 00:21:11,208 --> 00:21:13,628 Well, there it is, Leonard. 484 00:21:13,709 --> 00:21:18,379 Though I rarely make mistakes, this one was a doozy. 485 00:21:18,500 --> 00:21:22,880 I horribly misinterpreted the entrepreneurial spirit. 486 00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:25,790 It turns out it's not about making a quick buck, 487 00:21:25,917 --> 00:21:27,787 but about creating a reliable product, 488 00:21:27,917 --> 00:21:30,207 and then upholding its quality and integrity. 489 00:21:30,333 --> 00:21:32,543 It's about keeping all your dealings, 490 00:21:32,667 --> 00:21:35,377 whether business or personal, on the up and up. 491 00:21:35,500 --> 00:21:36,880 And treating your customers 492 00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:40,250 with all the openness and honesty they so richly deserve. 493 00:21:43,667 --> 00:21:47,497 Say, you don't happen to have any milk, do you? 494 00:21:49,083 --> 00:21:50,293 Milk? 495 00:21:59,667 --> 00:22:00,877 That's right, folks. 496 00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:02,790 Step right up and get a nice, tall glass 497 00:22:02,875 --> 00:22:03,875 of good, wholesome milk. 498 00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:06,210 Then again, there's nothing wrong 499 00:22:06,333 --> 00:22:09,673 with identifying a market need and then satisfying it.