1 00:00:00,083 --> 00:00:01,463 Of the leash 2 00:00:01,542 --> 00:00:04,082 - 3 00:00:08,417 --> 00:00:10,127 - 4 00:00:10,208 --> 00:00:11,828 For a pair of pants 5 00:00:11,917 --> 00:00:14,207 His favorite pastime 6 00:00:14,291 --> 00:00:16,581 For the last time 7 00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:18,287 - 8 00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:30,960 Why can't I be a normal kid like any other? 9 00:00:31,041 --> 00:00:33,131 Now, doodle bug, listen to mother. 10 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,920 I hate dogs. 11 00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:43,502 I do not wish to be a dog. 12 00:00:52,291 --> 00:00:53,251 Yes! 13 00:01:18,417 --> 00:01:19,787 Garbage! 14 00:01:20,792 --> 00:01:22,042 Garbage! 15 00:01:22,667 --> 00:01:24,457 More garbage! 16 00:01:24,542 --> 00:01:27,752 Brother, Saturday afternoon TV is the worst! 17 00:01:29,792 --> 00:01:31,582 Ah, now we're talking. 18 00:01:31,667 --> 00:01:34,127 The Soporific Scientific Channel presents 19 00:01:34,208 --> 00:01:36,668 "Exotic Birds Of South America." 20 00:01:36,750 --> 00:01:40,500 Holy Hannah! I love the latinas! 21 00:01:41,750 --> 00:01:43,460 Hey! What happened to my program? 22 00:01:43,542 --> 00:01:47,002 I changed it, and frankly, I'm very disappointed in you, 23 00:01:47,083 --> 00:01:48,963 watching such titillating nonsense. 24 00:01:49,041 --> 00:01:50,291 It's boorish. 25 00:01:50,375 --> 00:01:52,875 Exotic birds are not boring! 26 00:01:52,959 --> 00:01:55,789 Not "boring"-- boorish. 27 00:01:55,875 --> 00:01:58,165 A boor is a cretin, a philistine, 28 00:01:58,250 --> 00:02:00,040 an individual of no breeding. 29 00:02:01,125 --> 00:02:02,245 Oh, never mind. 30 00:02:02,333 --> 00:02:05,083 Anyway, we're not watching it anymore. 31 00:02:05,166 --> 00:02:07,206 I dibbed the TV for the day weeks ago. 32 00:02:07,291 --> 00:02:08,751 What for? 33 00:02:08,834 --> 00:02:11,714 Only the single-most unmissable television event of the year. 34 00:02:11,792 --> 00:02:14,502 Live from the East Westland Municipal Auditorium, 35 00:02:14,583 --> 00:02:17,333 it's the 67th Annual East Westland 36 00:02:17,417 --> 00:02:19,417 Canine Convocation Dog Show. 37 00:02:19,500 --> 00:02:20,420 Okay, two things. 38 00:02:20,500 --> 00:02:23,580 One, a cat watching a dog show's an abomination! 39 00:02:23,667 --> 00:02:26,417 And two, it doesn't start for another hour. 40 00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:29,830 This is the preshow. I hate to miss any of the hype. 41 00:02:29,917 --> 00:02:31,167 Ooh, look! 42 00:02:31,250 --> 00:02:34,380 Their interactive website is up and running. 43 00:02:34,458 --> 00:02:40,128 67thcanineconvocation.dog. 44 00:02:40,208 --> 00:02:42,958 "Profiles of the dogs and their owners, 45 00:02:43,041 --> 00:02:46,001 interviews, insight, downloadable stats." 46 00:02:46,083 --> 00:02:48,883 Ahh! And a fantasy pick-the-winner game! 47 00:02:48,959 --> 00:02:50,129 I'm in heaven! 48 00:02:53,500 --> 00:02:55,380 Pardon my confusion, 49 00:02:55,458 --> 00:02:59,578 but I could have sworn you were of the feline persuasion. 50 00:02:59,667 --> 00:03:02,667 Why do you give a hoot about a dog show? 51 00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:06,040 Well, one, they don't televise the cat show. 52 00:03:06,125 --> 00:03:07,455 I don't understand that. 53 00:03:07,542 --> 00:03:10,332 And two, despite its heavy canine energy, 54 00:03:10,417 --> 00:03:13,497 the dog show still champions all the civilized traits 55 00:03:13,583 --> 00:03:15,293 that I, as a proud descendant 56 00:03:15,375 --> 00:03:19,035 of the Louisiana Puddinpuss family, was taught to respect. 57 00:03:19,125 --> 00:03:21,285 Civilized traits?! Like hacking up fur balls 58 00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:23,535 and leaving half-mice on the living-room floor? 59 00:03:23,625 --> 00:03:27,075 Ooh, look! The red carpet! Oh, it's beautiful. 60 00:03:27,166 --> 00:03:29,376 And here they come-- 61 00:03:29,458 --> 00:03:31,628 East Westland's proudest purebreds. 62 00:03:31,709 --> 00:03:33,999 Brother, look at all those blue bloods. 63 00:03:34,083 --> 00:03:37,003 I bet they got more papers than a condor's birdcage. 64 00:03:37,083 --> 00:03:38,043 Say, what breed are you, Spot? 65 00:03:38,709 --> 00:03:40,379 Breed? Why, I'm not sure. 66 00:03:40,458 --> 00:03:43,418 That is to say, I've never actually seen my papers. 67 00:03:43,500 --> 00:03:46,040 Leonard, perhaps you can enlighten us. 68 00:03:46,125 --> 00:03:49,125 What noble blood courses through my canine veins? 69 00:03:49,208 --> 00:03:50,208 I think you're just a mutt. 70 00:03:50,291 --> 00:03:52,131 A mutt?! 71 00:03:52,208 --> 00:03:54,788 Mutt-- defined in the dog-show glossary 72 00:03:54,875 --> 00:03:56,375 as "a dog of mixed breed, 73 00:03:56,458 --> 00:04:00,128 utterly unwelcome in our hallowed halls-- a mongrel." 74 00:04:00,208 --> 00:04:05,418 Me-- Spot Helperman/Scott Leadready II-- a mongrel? 75 00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:06,830 I think not! 76 00:04:06,917 --> 00:04:09,167 Now, now. Don't feel bad. 77 00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:11,920 We can't all be scions of the Puddinpuss dynasty. 78 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:14,630 There's no shame in being an untouchable. 79 00:04:14,709 --> 00:04:18,459 Your take on untouchables is touching, but I don't accept it. 80 00:04:18,542 --> 00:04:21,382 A dog of my intellect, taste, and bravery? 81 00:04:21,458 --> 00:04:24,328 Come on, I must be a purebred. 82 00:04:24,333 --> 00:04:28,213 Perhaps I'm an Australian cattle dog, 83 00:04:28,291 --> 00:04:30,251 said to be among the smartest of breeds. 84 00:04:30,333 --> 00:04:34,333 Or perhaps a poodle, the poshest of pooches. 85 00:04:35,792 --> 00:04:38,882 Maybe my bravery derives from the stalwart rescue blood 86 00:04:38,959 --> 00:04:40,459 of the St. Bernard. 87 00:04:42,041 --> 00:04:44,961 Sorry, Spot, but I don't think you're any of those breeds. 88 00:04:45,041 --> 00:04:47,171 But I must be some breed! 89 00:04:47,250 --> 00:04:50,830 Otherwise, I'm a multibreed or a half-breed 90 00:04:50,917 --> 00:04:53,167 or even a worse-- a no breed. 91 00:04:53,250 --> 00:04:54,630 I got to know, Leonard! 92 00:04:54,709 --> 00:04:57,629 Oh, I'm going across the street for a bit, doodle bug. 93 00:04:57,709 --> 00:04:58,999 You can take Spot for a walk if you want to. 94 00:05:00,250 --> 00:05:01,670 Hey, Mom, do you know what kind of dog Spot is? 95 00:05:04,250 --> 00:05:08,250 Well, of course-- he's a lovable, dubbable, cutie-wootie, 96 00:05:08,333 --> 00:05:11,423 oogie-boogie, pupper-wupper kind of dog. 97 00:05:11,500 --> 00:05:12,750 No. I mean what breed? 98 00:05:12,834 --> 00:05:14,424 Ah ha ha! 99 00:05:14,500 --> 00:05:18,460 Oh, Lenny-penny, he's got more different kinds of blood in him 100 00:05:18,542 --> 00:05:20,422 than a hyperactive mosquito. 101 00:05:20,500 --> 00:05:23,290 She obviously doesn't realize that any dog 102 00:05:23,375 --> 00:05:25,955 who can pass himself off as a fourth grader 103 00:05:26,041 --> 00:05:27,461 must have purebred genes. 104 00:05:27,542 --> 00:05:30,212 It's just a matter of finding out what kind. 105 00:05:30,291 --> 00:05:31,921 Will you please be quiet? 106 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,500 You're drowning out the dog show. 107 00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:35,713 156 breeds of dog 108 00:05:35,792 --> 00:05:39,212 all vying for the title of "best in show." 109 00:05:39,291 --> 00:05:41,581 Of course. That's it! 110 00:05:41,667 --> 00:05:44,077 There are 156 breeds at that show. 111 00:05:44,166 --> 00:05:46,376 One of them must be related to me. 112 00:05:46,458 --> 00:05:49,378 It's just one big doggy gene pool, 113 00:05:49,458 --> 00:05:53,498 just waiting for me to dip my tongue in and lap, lap, lap. 114 00:05:53,583 --> 00:05:57,713 Come on, Leonard, we're taking that walk-- 115 00:05:57,792 --> 00:06:01,172 to the 67th Annual East Westland 116 00:06:01,250 --> 00:06:03,710 Canine Convocation Dog Show. 117 00:06:03,792 --> 00:06:06,542 Oh, brother. There goes my Saturday. 118 00:06:06,625 --> 00:06:10,245 I'm all atwitter, Leonard. Look at me-- twittering! 119 00:06:10,333 --> 00:06:13,583 I absolutely love voyages of self-discovery. 120 00:06:13,667 --> 00:06:16,667 Just like Alex Haley, in the classic novel 121 00:06:16,750 --> 00:06:20,540 and groundbreaking miniseries, I'm gonna find my roots! 122 00:06:22,375 --> 00:06:25,455 Ha ha-- roots! Hey, you hear that, boys? 123 00:06:25,542 --> 00:06:27,172 Yeah, what a poser. 124 00:06:27,250 --> 00:06:30,380 First, the mutt dresses up like a boy. 125 00:06:30,458 --> 00:06:32,378 Now he's a purebred wannabe. 126 00:06:32,458 --> 00:06:34,538 Hey, Mr. Wannabe-- heh-heh heh-heh. 127 00:06:35,875 --> 00:06:38,415 See that, Leonard? That's how mutts behave. 128 00:06:38,500 --> 00:06:39,920 I'm obviously not one of them. 129 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:43,040 Hey, what are you talking mutts, huh? 130 00:06:43,125 --> 00:06:45,915 I'm a Sicilian Dung-Beetle Terrier. 131 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:47,330 I got papers here! 132 00:06:47,417 --> 00:06:50,827 Yeah, and I'm a Longhaired Ortney Sheepdog. 133 00:06:50,917 --> 00:06:52,327 I got a haircut. 134 00:06:52,417 --> 00:06:54,077 They're purebreds? Wow! 135 00:06:54,166 --> 00:06:56,326 If those lowlifes have papers, 136 00:06:56,417 --> 00:06:58,917 I must be a really special breed. 137 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:02,380 Come on, Lenny, let's get to that dog show. 138 00:07:02,458 --> 00:07:04,418 Thank goodness! They finally left. 139 00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:07,250 Now I can concentrate on the show. 140 00:07:07,333 --> 00:07:10,253 Just peace, quiet, and fine breeding. 141 00:07:15,875 --> 00:07:18,535 What in sweet creation is that unholy noise?! 142 00:07:20,583 --> 00:07:24,213 It's just what we don't need around here-- another cat. 143 00:07:24,291 --> 00:07:27,711 Well, how do you do, birdie boy? 144 00:07:27,792 --> 00:07:29,502 If I wasn't such a companionable cat, 145 00:07:29,583 --> 00:07:32,673 I might be inclined to call you lunch. 146 00:07:33,750 --> 00:07:37,380 That voice-- I know that voice. 147 00:07:37,458 --> 00:07:40,248 But seeing as I am-- companionable, that is-- 148 00:07:40,333 --> 00:07:42,753 I'd settle for a bowl of crunchies 149 00:07:42,834 --> 00:07:45,384 and a place to rest for an hour or two. 150 00:07:45,458 --> 00:07:48,168 But it couldn't be... could it? 151 00:07:48,250 --> 00:07:51,250 Hey, Jolly, there's a cat here wanting food. 152 00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:52,883 Tell him to go away! 153 00:07:52,959 --> 00:07:54,669 Oh, come now, son. 154 00:07:54,750 --> 00:07:58,290 Is that any way to treat your old dad? 155 00:07:58,375 --> 00:07:59,575 Say what?! 156 00:07:59,667 --> 00:08:03,747 Behold, Leonard-- the dog show! 157 00:08:03,834 --> 00:08:06,584 It's like the Camelot of good breeding. 158 00:08:06,667 --> 00:08:09,127 And just as a young King Arthur discovered his royal birth 159 00:08:09,208 --> 00:08:10,918 by pulling the sword from the stone, 160 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:15,880 so I, too, shall soon redefine myself by my noble ancestry. 161 00:08:15,959 --> 00:08:17,709 King Arthur's just a legend. 162 00:08:19,041 --> 00:08:22,541 You're a real, live dog who disguises himself as a boy. 163 00:08:22,625 --> 00:08:26,375 Oh, stop being so literal and make like a purebred owner. 164 00:08:31,375 --> 00:08:33,165 It's beautiful! 165 00:08:33,250 --> 00:08:38,880 Just think-- somewhere in there lies my ancestry. 166 00:08:45,834 --> 00:08:48,634 That scruffy schlemiel is your pop? 167 00:08:48,709 --> 00:08:50,879 You told me you were one 168 00:08:50,959 --> 00:08:52,579 of the hoity-toity Louisiana Puddinpusses. 169 00:08:52,667 --> 00:08:54,997 I am... on my mother's side. 170 00:08:55,208 --> 00:08:57,878 See, my mommy, Missy Puddinpuss, had it all-- 171 00:08:57,959 --> 00:08:59,959 comfort, wealth, a good name. 172 00:09:00,041 --> 00:09:04,421 The world was her ball of yarn... until he came along-- 173 00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:09,130 Mr. Poppy, with his polished, hard-luck story and a smile. 174 00:09:09,208 --> 00:09:12,208 He led mommy down the path of scandal and shame. 175 00:09:12,291 --> 00:09:14,541 Left her with nothing but bittersweet memories 176 00:09:14,625 --> 00:09:17,455 and a whole basketful of little Puddinpusses to feed, 177 00:09:17,542 --> 00:09:18,882 including me. 178 00:09:19,041 --> 00:09:20,631 That's the cat on our windowsill, 179 00:09:20,709 --> 00:09:23,329 and he's got some nerve showing his whiskers around here. 180 00:09:23,417 --> 00:09:27,787 He's a crude, classless, partying, womanizing-- 181 00:09:27,875 --> 00:09:31,075 whoa, whoa, whoa! I've heard enough. 182 00:09:31,625 --> 00:09:33,955 Sounds like my kind of cat. 183 00:09:34,041 --> 00:09:36,131 Hey, there. Jolly tells me you're his pop. 184 00:09:36,208 --> 00:09:37,328 So fill me in. 185 00:09:37,417 --> 00:09:39,917 How did a fun-loving guy like you 186 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,710 turn out a prissy, fussy cat like that? 187 00:09:42,667 --> 00:09:46,377 Oh, he gets all the priss and fuss from his mother. 188 00:09:48,458 --> 00:09:51,328 Oh, come on, Jolly, let him in. 189 00:09:51,417 --> 00:09:52,287 He's fun! 190 00:09:52,375 --> 00:09:54,205 Absotively negativo! 191 00:09:54,291 --> 00:09:58,331 Why should I let him back in? He was the one who walked out. 192 00:09:58,417 --> 00:10:02,037 Welcome back to the 67th Canine Convocation Dog Show. 193 00:10:02,125 --> 00:10:05,535 The hype is all over, and there's nothing left now 194 00:10:05,625 --> 00:10:06,915 but the judging. 195 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,460 Attention, handlers. 196 00:10:08,542 --> 00:10:12,382 Please ready your pets for the "best of breed" competition. 197 00:10:12,458 --> 00:10:15,538 Just look at all these admirable creatures, Leonard. 198 00:10:15,625 --> 00:10:18,575 To think, one of them is long-lost kindred. 199 00:10:18,667 --> 00:10:20,787 They all look kind of snooty to me, 200 00:10:20,875 --> 00:10:22,375 and so do their owners. 201 00:10:22,458 --> 00:10:24,078 -Sit up! -Lie down. 202 00:10:24,166 --> 00:10:26,626 -Be still. -Dude, you got to stop shedding. 203 00:10:26,709 --> 00:10:28,999 Dude, it's like bad for our image. 204 00:10:29,083 --> 00:10:31,383 Leroy, y'all want to stop panting? 205 00:10:31,458 --> 00:10:35,418 Your breath's hotter than a barbecued chili pepper in August. 206 00:10:35,500 --> 00:10:36,670 Hoover, agh! 207 00:10:36,750 --> 00:10:39,380 You're slobbering all over my dress. 208 00:10:39,458 --> 00:10:40,748 It'll stain! 209 00:10:40,834 --> 00:10:44,004 Look, Leonard-- a dalmatian. They're born actors, you know. 210 00:10:44,083 --> 00:10:46,583 That could explain my flair for the theater. 211 00:10:48,208 --> 00:10:50,498 You're Seychelles Grand Hovernose. 212 00:10:50,583 --> 00:10:52,713 I recognize you from our cat's downloadable 213 00:10:52,792 --> 00:10:55,632 dog-show fantasy game profile. 214 00:10:55,709 --> 00:10:57,079 Never mind. Hard to explain. 215 00:10:57,166 --> 00:10:59,626 I was just wondering. 216 00:10:59,709 --> 00:11:01,919 Take a good look at me. Looking? Okay. 217 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:04,380 First impression-- don't think too much. 218 00:11:04,458 --> 00:11:05,668 Am I a dalmatian or what? 219 00:11:05,750 --> 00:11:08,000 I rather doubt it. 220 00:11:08,083 --> 00:11:10,423 But the camera loves me. I have the talent. 221 00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:12,920 But do you have the proud, erect tail? 222 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:15,170 The ability to run for hours on end, 223 00:11:15,250 --> 00:11:18,290 attributable to our breeding as English carriage dogs? 224 00:11:18,375 --> 00:11:20,745 Actually, running is not my strong suit. 225 00:11:20,834 --> 00:11:21,964 Asthma. 226 00:11:22,041 --> 00:11:24,581 Although I do know something about the carriage 227 00:11:24,667 --> 00:11:25,877 and its relationship 228 00:11:25,959 --> 00:11:28,579 to 17th-century English economic development. 229 00:11:28,667 --> 00:11:32,077 Do you have, in a word, Spots? 230 00:11:32,166 --> 00:11:33,126 Eh... I got one. My name is Spot. 231 00:11:37,375 --> 00:11:40,035 You are most certainly not a dalmatian. 232 00:11:40,125 --> 00:11:42,375 Okay. No hard feelings. 233 00:11:42,458 --> 00:11:45,038 One breed down, 155 to go. 234 00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:49,040 Ah! Bloodhounds! 235 00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:52,125 Now there's a noble breed. 236 00:11:52,208 --> 00:11:54,578 Used by law-enforcement agencies the world over 237 00:11:54,667 --> 00:11:56,417 to track down criminals. 238 00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:57,920 I must be a bloodhound! 239 00:11:58,000 --> 00:11:59,500 How else to explain 240 00:11:59,583 --> 00:12:02,333 my extraordinary crime-solving abilities 241 00:12:02,417 --> 00:12:06,377 in my manifestation as... "Scottlock" Holmes? 242 00:12:06,458 --> 00:12:07,628 Ha ha ha ha! 243 00:12:07,709 --> 00:12:10,629 That's quite an outfit there, boy. 244 00:12:10,709 --> 00:12:14,039 But do you have the bloodhound saggy skin? 245 00:12:14,125 --> 00:12:18,995 The oversized ears designed to hold the scent around the nose? 246 00:12:20,917 --> 00:12:23,787 Eh... in a word, no. 247 00:12:23,875 --> 00:12:25,205 Then take a walk, boy. 248 00:12:25,291 --> 00:12:29,421 This here's a bloodhounds only area. 249 00:12:29,500 --> 00:12:32,960 For purebreds, they sure don't have very good manners. 250 00:12:33,041 --> 00:12:35,211 It's almost like they wish they weren't dogs. 251 00:12:37,250 --> 00:12:39,420 Maybe I'm a golden retriever. 252 00:12:39,500 --> 00:12:41,500 Uh, you're like blue, dude. 253 00:12:41,583 --> 00:12:44,213 Too small. 254 00:12:44,291 --> 00:12:46,381 -Tan grande! -Tan grande! 255 00:12:46,458 --> 00:12:48,538 Too many fur issues. 256 00:12:48,625 --> 00:12:51,075 Not enough fur issues. 257 00:12:54,583 --> 00:12:58,503 Maybe Moe and Dickens and the rest of them are right. 258 00:12:58,583 --> 00:13:00,333 Maybe I am just a mutt. 259 00:13:00,417 --> 00:13:01,247 Don't feel bad, Spot. 260 00:13:01,750 --> 00:13:04,790 You don't want to be like these snobby dogs, anyway. 261 00:13:04,875 --> 00:13:05,825 You're right, bunky. 262 00:13:05,917 --> 00:13:07,167 The way they treated me, 263 00:13:07,250 --> 00:13:09,210 I wouldn't join their little blue-blood club 264 00:13:09,291 --> 00:13:11,421 if they got down on all fours and begged me! 265 00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:14,880 Calling all Scottish Blue Bloodhounds. 266 00:13:14,959 --> 00:13:17,459 Come on, McDougal. That's our cue! 267 00:13:17,542 --> 00:13:20,502 Leonard, look! It's one of me! 268 00:13:20,583 --> 00:13:22,133 I found my roots! 269 00:13:22,208 --> 00:13:24,708 I'm a Scottish Blue Bloodhound! 270 00:13:41,667 --> 00:13:45,627 Sporran and chain mail 271 00:13:45,709 --> 00:13:47,959 A purebred scot 272 00:13:50,417 --> 00:13:52,957 They can take away our chew toys, 273 00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:55,961 but they cannot take away our freedom! 274 00:13:56,041 --> 00:13:59,421 I named my alter ego Scott 275 00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:07,420 On my Scottish roots so deep 276 00:14:11,542 --> 00:14:15,042 Sporran and chain mail 277 00:14:23,583 --> 00:14:25,173 Last call-- 278 00:14:25,250 --> 00:14:27,250 all Scottish Blue Bloodhounds to the show floor. 279 00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:29,503 Come on, Leonard. Take me out there. 280 00:14:29,583 --> 00:14:30,423 Put me in the show. 281 00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:32,420 I want to take my rightful place 282 00:14:32,500 --> 00:14:34,920 with the rest of my extended blue family. 283 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,790 Okay. If that's what you really want. 284 00:14:39,458 --> 00:14:41,378 I can't see a thing. Where am I? 285 00:14:41,458 --> 00:14:44,458 I think we're right in the middle of the floor. 286 00:14:44,542 --> 00:14:46,582 And here they are-- 287 00:14:46,667 --> 00:14:47,997 the Scottish Blue Bloodhounds. 288 00:14:52,750 --> 00:14:57,460 Oh, no! I'm a wiener dog?! 289 00:15:11,875 --> 00:15:13,785 What in tarnation is that?! 290 00:15:13,875 --> 00:15:16,785 Oh! Some kind of a horrible mongrel! 291 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:18,957 He's not one of us, laddies! 292 00:15:19,583 --> 00:15:21,133 Let's get him! 293 00:15:23,750 --> 00:15:25,460 Come on, boys... laddies. 294 00:15:25,542 --> 00:15:27,542 We must share some blood, right? 295 00:15:27,625 --> 00:15:29,535 I mean, there's the whole blue thing. 296 00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:32,917 You're blue... I'm blue. We're simpatico. 297 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,380 Ooh, boy. 298 00:15:34,458 --> 00:15:40,498 With the light brown hair 299 00:15:45,583 --> 00:15:46,833 Whoa! 300 00:15:46,917 --> 00:15:49,747 No harm, no foul. 301 00:15:49,834 --> 00:15:52,464 Ha ha ha! 302 00:15:52,542 --> 00:15:56,082 Hey, you are one fun feline. 303 00:15:56,166 --> 00:15:59,076 Hey, Jolly, get off your furry keister. 304 00:15:59,166 --> 00:16:00,376 Come sing with us. 305 00:16:00,458 --> 00:16:02,828 Your poppy is a hoot and a half. 306 00:16:02,917 --> 00:16:06,747 Sorry, but I do not engage in the type of low-brow antics 307 00:16:06,834 --> 00:16:08,084 Mr. Poppy enjoys. 308 00:16:08,166 --> 00:16:09,416 Besides, I'm otherw-- 309 00:16:09,500 --> 00:16:10,920 Pretty Boy, Pretty Boy! 310 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,250 Come here, quick-- on the screen. 311 00:16:12,333 --> 00:16:13,253 Look, look, look! 312 00:16:13,333 --> 00:16:14,173 Spot! 313 00:16:15,125 --> 00:16:17,285 Boy, is that poor mutt out of place 314 00:16:17,375 --> 00:16:18,575 in this highborn crowd. 315 00:16:18,667 --> 00:16:19,827 Oh, tsk-tsk-tsk. 316 00:16:19,917 --> 00:16:23,037 Well, I suppose that's what he gets for putting on airs 317 00:16:23,125 --> 00:16:25,665 and refusing to acknowledge his real roots. 318 00:16:27,166 --> 00:16:30,166 Come on, Jolly, it's starting to rain. 319 00:16:30,250 --> 00:16:34,000 How about letting your poor pop in to dry his fur? 320 00:16:34,083 --> 00:16:37,003 I have no father! I have no father! 321 00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:45,254 Self-awareness is obviously not this cat's strong suit. 322 00:16:45,333 --> 00:16:47,133 That's quite a disturbance down on the floor. 323 00:16:47,208 --> 00:16:48,668 So let's take a break. 324 00:16:48,750 --> 00:16:51,670 And then we'll be back for the "best of show" judging. 325 00:16:51,750 --> 00:16:53,790 Best of show! Best of show's next! 326 00:16:53,875 --> 00:16:57,165 Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy! 327 00:16:58,917 --> 00:17:02,537 No! The cable's out! Oh, cruel fate. 328 00:17:02,625 --> 00:17:05,455 You inimical gods of telecommunications, 329 00:17:05,542 --> 00:17:07,962 what have I done to offend you so? 330 00:17:08,041 --> 00:17:09,081 My life is ruined! 331 00:17:10,375 --> 00:17:15,035 Say, Mr. Jolly, I think I can get your picture back... 332 00:17:15,125 --> 00:17:16,455 If you let me inside. 333 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:19,000 You can? 334 00:17:19,083 --> 00:17:21,423 Well, don't just stand there. Hurry, hurry! 335 00:17:21,500 --> 00:17:24,040 I'd like to emphasize that letting you in the house 336 00:17:24,125 --> 00:17:26,785 does not symbolize me letting you back into my life 337 00:17:26,875 --> 00:17:28,825 and acknowledging my roots. 338 00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:30,577 Whatever you say, son. 339 00:17:43,041 --> 00:17:46,631 You're logged on to the dog-show website, right? 340 00:17:47,583 --> 00:17:52,173 So, we just plug the computer into the TV monitor... 341 00:17:53,500 --> 00:17:57,080 Pull up the live streaming webcast and voilà! 342 00:17:57,166 --> 00:17:58,916 We're back, 343 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:02,170 and you absolutely won't believe what's going on here. 344 00:18:02,250 --> 00:18:04,500 You don't want to miss a second of this. 345 00:18:06,875 --> 00:18:09,575 Get that mutt out of here! 346 00:18:11,667 --> 00:18:15,537 He'll infect my poopsie with his mongrel diseases! 347 00:18:15,625 --> 00:18:19,125 Leonard, where are you? Help! 348 00:18:19,208 --> 00:18:21,498 Spot! Spot! 349 00:18:26,125 --> 00:18:27,285 Here, boy! 350 00:18:27,917 --> 00:18:30,167 Curses! It looks like curtains. 351 00:18:30,250 --> 00:18:33,330 The jig is up. What horrible clichés. 352 00:18:33,417 --> 00:18:35,127 Is that me talking? 353 00:18:35,208 --> 00:18:36,998 Everybody, stop!! 354 00:18:37,083 --> 00:18:39,583 What are you people doing? 355 00:18:39,667 --> 00:18:41,577 Who? Us? 356 00:18:41,667 --> 00:18:42,917 Yeah, you. 357 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:46,080 I'm totally amazed at how clueless you all are. 358 00:18:46,166 --> 00:18:47,666 What do you mean, son? 359 00:18:47,750 --> 00:18:50,000 You all say you're dog lovers, right? 360 00:18:50,083 --> 00:18:51,753 Uh...yeah? 361 00:18:51,834 --> 00:18:54,044 But you're totally missing out on what a dog is. 362 00:18:54,125 --> 00:18:56,075 You just care about their breeding 363 00:18:56,166 --> 00:18:59,326 and their purebred papers, how many trophies they win, 364 00:18:59,333 --> 00:19:01,213 how they can make you look good. 365 00:19:01,291 --> 00:19:03,501 But that's not what makes a dog great. 366 00:19:03,583 --> 00:19:06,003 What makes a dog great is how loyal he is, 367 00:19:06,083 --> 00:19:08,963 the way he can be your absolute best friend in the world. 368 00:19:09,041 --> 00:19:12,461 Aw, Lenny, you're killing me here. 369 00:19:12,542 --> 00:19:15,382 All I'm saying is, for a crowd of dog lovers, 370 00:19:15,458 --> 00:19:18,958 I sure don't feel a whole lot of love in this room. 371 00:19:19,041 --> 00:19:21,671 Anyway... well, that's all. 372 00:19:36,041 --> 00:19:38,421 Hoover, you're a good dog. 373 00:19:38,500 --> 00:19:41,750 Oh, this dress is history anyway. 374 00:19:41,834 --> 00:19:46,084 You pant all you want to, Leroy. I love you, boy. 375 00:19:46,166 --> 00:19:50,996 Dude, you totally shed! 376 00:19:51,083 --> 00:19:52,793 Hi ya, Leonard. 377 00:19:52,875 --> 00:19:53,705 Hey, Spot. 378 00:19:54,458 --> 00:19:56,958 Can we go home now? 379 00:19:57,041 --> 00:19:58,581 You bet. 380 00:20:03,250 --> 00:20:05,920 How'd you do that trick with the television? 381 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:07,540 Where did a lowlife alley cat 382 00:20:07,625 --> 00:20:10,325 learn such advanced computer-networking skills? 383 00:20:10,417 --> 00:20:13,287 I've worked with a lot of discarded PCs 384 00:20:13,375 --> 00:20:15,035 left in alley dumpsters. 385 00:20:15,125 --> 00:20:17,165 So that's where I get my high-tech acumen. 386 00:20:17,250 --> 00:20:20,460 The Puddinpusses always said you were a low-down nogoodnik. 387 00:20:20,542 --> 00:20:23,332 Well, now that's not exactly true. 388 00:20:23,417 --> 00:20:26,207 In fact, I was quite the socialite. 389 00:20:26,291 --> 00:20:29,081 A scion of the Georgia Whiskervilles, I was. 390 00:20:29,166 --> 00:20:32,166 Whaaa! Oh, my silver spoons. 391 00:20:32,250 --> 00:20:34,290 You're a Whiskerville?! 392 00:20:34,375 --> 00:20:35,915 Yes, indeed. 393 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,130 But I found the whole purebred scene 394 00:20:38,208 --> 00:20:40,248 to be a very large crock of nonsense. 395 00:20:40,333 --> 00:20:42,213 I insisted on telling those snobs-- 396 00:20:42,291 --> 00:20:44,501 including the Puddinpusses, I'm afraid-- 397 00:20:44,583 --> 00:20:47,003 that who you are is more important 398 00:20:47,083 --> 00:20:49,213 than who your pappy was. 399 00:20:49,291 --> 00:20:52,001 Well, they threw me off their property for my trouble. 400 00:20:52,083 --> 00:20:53,003 I never knew. 401 00:20:53,083 --> 00:20:57,083 Would you stay here forever, please, please, please? 402 00:20:57,166 --> 00:21:00,746 I'd love to, Jolly, but I'm a rambling cat. 403 00:21:00,834 --> 00:21:03,794 And now that I'm fed and dry, for which I thank you kindly, 404 00:21:03,875 --> 00:21:05,825 it's time to be a-ramblin' on. 405 00:21:05,917 --> 00:21:10,457 Don't worry, Jolly, I'll drop back by for a visit every now and again. 406 00:21:10,542 --> 00:21:11,672 Bye now. 407 00:21:14,583 --> 00:21:17,543 So, you're a Puddinpuss and a Whiskerville. 408 00:21:17,625 --> 00:21:19,125 You've got some genes. 409 00:21:19,208 --> 00:21:22,628 Oh, who cares? Didn't you hear what he said? 410 00:21:22,709 --> 00:21:26,039 What kind of cat you are is more important 411 00:21:26,125 --> 00:21:29,535 than who your completely wonderful pappy was. 412 00:21:33,291 --> 00:21:35,001 It's nice to be loved, Leonard. 413 00:21:35,083 --> 00:21:37,923 But I still can't believe I'm not a purebred. 414 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:40,080 You just don't get it, do you, Spot? 415 00:21:40,166 --> 00:21:41,666 You're better than them. 416 00:21:41,750 --> 00:21:44,670 You're not just smart like an Australian Cattle Dog 417 00:21:44,750 --> 00:21:46,380 or brave like a St. Bernard 418 00:21:46,458 --> 00:21:48,378 or a good tracker like a bloodhound. 419 00:21:48,458 --> 00:21:51,328 You're brave and smart and a good tracker 420 00:21:51,417 --> 00:21:53,537 and a dozen other things besides. 421 00:21:53,625 --> 00:21:56,875 That's why I love mutts. You've got it all. 422 00:21:56,959 --> 00:22:00,039 Still, I think I looked rather dashing in a kilt. 423 00:22:01,625 --> 00:22:04,245 Hey, Mr. Jolly's not watching the show.