1
00:00:00,333 --> 00:00:01,883
♪ Born on the wrong end
Of the leash ♪

2
00:00:01,959 --> 00:00:04,329
-♪ He was a dreamer ♪
-♪ And a little schemer ♪

3
00:00:04,375 --> 00:00:05,705
♪ A nutty mutt living a dog's life ♪

4
00:00:05,792 --> 00:00:07,422
♪ But when he'd hear the bell for school ♪

5
00:00:07,500 --> 00:00:08,500
♪ He'd start to drool ♪

6
00:00:08,583 --> 00:00:10,133
-♪ One day he says ♪
-♪ I'll take a chance ♪

7
00:00:10,208 --> 00:00:11,788
♪ Trades his leash
For a pair of pants ♪

8
00:00:11,875 --> 00:00:14,205
♪ In a glance, school becomes
His favorite pastime ♪

9
00:00:14,291 --> 00:00:16,631
♪ I have buried a bone
For the last time ♪

10
00:00:16,709 --> 00:00:18,039
-♪ He says ♪
-♪ I want to be a boy ♪

11
00:00:18,125 --> 00:00:19,875
♪ Ooh, he's bad ♪

12
00:00:19,959 --> 00:00:21,249
♪ He's so over just being rover ♪

13
00:00:21,333 --> 00:00:22,583
♪ I gotta be a boy ♪

14
00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:25,247
♪ He says he's just gonna be a boy ♪

15
00:00:25,333 --> 00:00:26,673
♪ Turns out he's a regular Einstein ♪

16
00:00:26,750 --> 00:00:28,420
♪ And Leonard is treading a fine line ♪

17
00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:31,000
Why can't I be a normal kid
like any other?

18
00:00:31,083 --> 00:00:33,083
Now, doodle bug, listen to mother.

19
00:00:33,166 --> 00:00:35,126
♪ I want to be a boy ♪

20
00:00:35,208 --> 00:00:36,788
I hate dogs.

21
00:00:36,875 --> 00:00:39,745
♪ I gotta be a boy ♪

22
00:00:39,834 --> 00:00:41,504
♪ This power pup's gonna be a boy ♪

23
00:00:41,583 --> 00:00:43,503
I do not wish to be a dog.

24
00:00:43,583 --> 00:00:46,083
♪ Now this bowser's ready for trousers ♪

25
00:00:46,166 --> 00:00:47,536
♪ I got to be a boy ♪

26
00:00:47,625 --> 00:00:49,075
♪ His nose is wet but you can bet ♪

27
00:00:49,166 --> 00:00:52,206
♪ This teacher's pet is gonna be a boy ♪

28
00:00:52,291 --> 00:00:54,131
Yes!

29
00:00:57,542 --> 00:01:00,252
[bagpipe music playing]

30
00:01:08,792 --> 00:01:12,712
[announcer] We now return to
"The Weepy And The Sorry."

31
00:01:12,792 --> 00:01:15,502
[man] I'm sorry, Emberly.

32
00:01:15,583 --> 00:01:18,503
I'm so very, very sorry.

33
00:01:18,583 --> 00:01:19,923
[crying]

34
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,920
[gasps]
She slapped him.

35
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,920
I can't believe she was so violent.

36
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,080
Yeah, that Emberly's a feisty one.

37
00:01:26,166 --> 00:01:27,246
[crying]

38
00:01:27,333 --> 00:01:29,043
She hit him again.

39
00:01:29,125 --> 00:01:31,245
[Emberly] You never
loved me, Bryce. Never!

40
00:01:31,333 --> 00:01:33,883
Give it to him again, Emberly.

41
00:01:33,959 --> 00:01:36,249
[Bryce] Emberly, you know it's not true.

42
00:01:36,333 --> 00:01:38,083
Oh, it's true, all right.

43
00:01:38,166 --> 00:01:41,076
Yeah, we heard what you told
Blake Breckinridge yesterday,

44
00:01:41,166 --> 00:01:42,746
you lowlife!

45
00:01:42,834 --> 00:01:44,834
[Bryce] I've always loved you. Always.

46
00:01:44,917 --> 00:01:47,077
Liar, liar, expensive pants on fire.

47
00:01:47,166 --> 00:01:49,246
You're too good for this bum, Emberly.

48
00:01:49,333 --> 00:01:51,083
[Mrs. Helperman] Mommy's home.

49
00:01:51,166 --> 00:01:52,326
Yaah!

50
00:01:52,417 --> 00:01:54,247
Psyche!

51
00:01:54,333 --> 00:01:56,673
[imitates Mrs. Helperman] Mommy's home.

52
00:01:56,750 --> 00:01:58,250
Ha ha ha.

53
00:01:58,333 --> 00:02:00,423
Très, très amusant.

54
00:02:00,500 --> 00:02:03,170
You should be ashamed
of yourself, scaring us.

55
00:02:03,250 --> 00:02:05,460
And especially during my story.

56
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:08,212
Watch out. My mom's right behind me.

57
00:02:08,291 --> 00:02:11,131
Yeah, right.

58
00:02:11,208 --> 00:02:13,128
Fool me once, shame on you.

59
00:02:13,208 --> 00:02:15,828
Fool me twice, I don't think so.

60
00:02:15,917 --> 00:02:17,417
Mommy's home.

61
00:02:17,500 --> 00:02:19,630
-Yaah!
-Yaah!

62
00:02:24,125 --> 00:02:27,165
Ha ha ha!

63
00:02:27,250 --> 00:02:28,580
Whoo! Oh!

64
00:02:37,583 --> 00:02:40,753
I know it's wrong
to frighten dumb animals,

65
00:02:40,834 --> 00:02:43,384
but it's just so much fun.

66
00:02:44,417 --> 00:02:46,667
So what's it going to be
today, master o' mine--

67
00:02:46,750 --> 00:02:50,000
a brisk walk in the park,
the old fake ball toss?

68
00:02:50,083 --> 00:02:51,753
That never gets old.

69
00:02:51,834 --> 00:02:54,214
Well, um, you see, I--

70
00:02:54,291 --> 00:02:56,791
Leonard, honey, you don't want to be late.

71
00:02:56,875 --> 00:03:00,325
O-Okay, mom. I just have to change first.

72
00:03:00,458 --> 00:03:03,828
W-Well, see you later, fella.

73
00:03:03,917 --> 00:03:06,957
Something is very wrong with Leonard.

74
00:03:07,041 --> 00:03:09,001
I'm not talking to you.

75
00:03:09,083 --> 00:03:10,463
Yeah, shove off.

76
00:03:10,542 --> 00:03:14,462
Now I'll never know
if Emberly takes Bryce back.

77
00:03:14,542 --> 00:03:17,132
All they ever do on these insipid TV shows

78
00:03:17,208 --> 00:03:18,958
that you waste your time watching

79
00:03:19,041 --> 00:03:21,251
instead of bettering yourself
with a good book

80
00:03:21,333 --> 00:03:23,463
is rehash all the insipid stories

81
00:03:23,542 --> 00:03:25,042
from yesterday's insipid show!

82
00:03:25,125 --> 00:03:26,875
Now can we talk about Leonard?

83
00:03:26,959 --> 00:03:29,709
First you've got to tell me
what "insipid" means.

84
00:03:34,667 --> 00:03:38,417
I try, Bill. I really try.

85
00:03:38,500 --> 00:03:40,920
Leonard is acting very strangely.

86
00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:43,460
I had the leash out, all ready to frolic,

87
00:03:43,542 --> 00:03:46,462
and he just mumbled
something about changing

88
00:03:46,542 --> 00:03:48,042
and slinked away.

89
00:03:48,125 --> 00:03:49,285
Don't you see?

90
00:03:49,375 --> 00:03:52,625
Leonard's never not taken me
for my walk. Never!

91
00:03:52,709 --> 00:03:55,209
Gee. Someone has an awfully
high opinion of himself.

92
00:03:55,291 --> 00:03:58,381
Yeah. The first time the kid
doesn't want to toss

93
00:03:58,458 --> 00:04:00,418
you a tennis ball covered with drool,

94
00:04:00,500 --> 00:04:02,380
and suddenly he's gone wacko.

95
00:04:02,458 --> 00:04:04,498
Leonard, let's go.
You're going to be late.

96
00:04:04,583 --> 00:04:06,383
[Leonard] I can't find my hatchet.

97
00:04:06,458 --> 00:04:09,458
Well, if you put your hatchet
in the same place every time,

98
00:04:09,542 --> 00:04:11,332
you wouldn't lose it.

99
00:04:11,417 --> 00:04:13,247
Did you look under your length of rope?

100
00:04:13,333 --> 00:04:15,463
Got it. Ready to go.

101
00:04:15,542 --> 00:04:17,962
I just hope you're not late
for the initiation ceremony.

102
00:04:18,041 --> 00:04:21,041
Hatchet? Rope? Initiation?

103
00:04:21,125 --> 00:04:24,325
Are you naysayers ready
to say nay to naysaying

104
00:04:24,333 --> 00:04:27,003
and join this yea-sayer in saying yea?

105
00:04:27,083 --> 00:04:29,423
-Huh?
-Huh?

106
00:04:29,500 --> 00:04:31,330
Okay, disregard that last remark.

107
00:04:31,417 --> 00:04:33,127
You'll have to pardon me.

108
00:04:33,208 --> 00:04:35,918
I'm really not myself today
because my best friend

109
00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:38,710
has suddenly joined the forces of evil!

110
00:04:38,792 --> 00:04:40,332
Ooh, this is bad.

111
00:04:40,417 --> 00:04:42,327
This is very, very bad.

112
00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:44,173
Good heavens.

113
00:04:44,250 --> 00:04:46,330
Spot, what do you think
is up with Leonard?

114
00:04:46,417 --> 00:04:48,707
I don't know. He might be in league

115
00:04:48,792 --> 00:04:52,382
with any sort of degenerate,
hideous villains.

116
00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:54,078
What? What?

117
00:04:54,166 --> 00:04:55,166
Carnies.

118
00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:56,380
-Yaah!
-Yaah!

119
00:04:56,417 --> 00:04:57,917
-Who?
-Who?

120
00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:00,460
Carnies! Show folk!

121
00:05:00,542 --> 00:05:04,332
The fiendishly foul,
dentally challenged denizens

122
00:05:04,417 --> 00:05:07,207
of the traveling carnival circus.

123
00:05:07,291 --> 00:05:09,211
[whimpers]

124
00:05:09,291 --> 00:05:11,211
Bands of barefoot brigands

125
00:05:11,291 --> 00:05:15,751
who travel by night,
kidnapping young innocents

126
00:05:15,834 --> 00:05:18,174
and brainwashing them to keep

127
00:05:18,250 --> 00:05:21,750
their evil thrill-ride
operating machine oiled.

128
00:05:21,834 --> 00:05:24,254
[Pretty Boy] Oh, come on.
That's ridiculous.

129
00:05:24,333 --> 00:05:26,083
Maybe it is,

130
00:05:26,166 --> 00:05:29,246
and maybe, at this very moment,
our sweet Leonard

131
00:05:29,333 --> 00:05:32,253
is getting a tattoo of a monster truck

132
00:05:32,333 --> 00:05:35,173
and arm-wrestling cyclops boy
for first dibs

133
00:05:35,250 --> 00:05:37,170
on the hurl-a-whirl.

134
00:05:37,250 --> 00:05:39,170
What are you waiting for?

135
00:05:39,250 --> 00:05:41,040
Save him! Now!

136
00:05:41,125 --> 00:05:42,995
I'm way ahead of you.

137
00:05:43,083 --> 00:05:45,713
Scott Leadready is on the case.

138
00:05:45,792 --> 00:05:48,672
But you don't know where Leonard is.
He's miles away by now.

139
00:05:48,750 --> 00:05:51,540
You're forgetting something.

140
00:05:51,625 --> 00:05:53,955
I happen to be a dog.

141
00:05:54,041 --> 00:05:57,381
[sniffs]

142
00:05:59,542 --> 00:06:02,132
[panting]

143
00:06:02,208 --> 00:06:04,458
I've-- I've followed Leonard's trail

144
00:06:04,542 --> 00:06:06,382
to this remote wooded area

145
00:06:06,458 --> 00:06:08,578
on the deserted outskirts of town.

146
00:06:08,667 --> 00:06:12,247
I want to go on the swings!

147
00:06:12,333 --> 00:06:14,793
Okay, okay, I over-dramatized a tad,

148
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:18,995
but come on, I'm worried about Leonard.

149
00:06:19,083 --> 00:06:20,753
[gasps]

150
00:06:20,834 --> 00:06:22,544
It's Leonard!

151
00:06:22,625 --> 00:06:26,075
A gang of carnies has got their
seldom-washed hands on him.

152
00:06:26,166 --> 00:06:30,376
Oh, boy. I'm so scared.

153
00:06:30,458 --> 00:06:33,828
I love you, bacon.

154
00:06:33,917 --> 00:06:37,497
I'm coming to save you, Leonard!

155
00:06:37,583 --> 00:06:41,043
Leonard!

156
00:06:41,125 --> 00:06:43,455
Scott? What are you--

157
00:06:43,542 --> 00:06:46,292
back off. Off, I say!

158
00:06:46,375 --> 00:06:48,785
You'll not harm this poor boy again,

159
00:06:48,875 --> 00:06:52,205
you foul minions
of the cotton-candy circuit.

160
00:06:52,291 --> 00:06:55,381
Okay, who let the blue fuzzy kid in?

161
00:06:58,417 --> 00:07:01,327
Um, Mr. Kenickie, this is my friend Scott,

162
00:07:01,375 --> 00:07:03,785
and he was just leaving.

163
00:07:03,875 --> 00:07:06,375
Well, friend or not, son,
civilians aren't allowed

164
00:07:06,458 --> 00:07:08,998
in Junior Boy Ranger headquarters.

165
00:07:09,083 --> 00:07:11,083
You know that.

166
00:07:11,166 --> 00:07:13,826
This is Junior Boy Ranger headquarters?

167
00:07:13,917 --> 00:07:16,457
That is what he said, Scott.

168
00:07:16,542 --> 00:07:20,712
And if you don't mind,
we're right in the middle

169
00:07:20,792 --> 00:07:23,502
of a good citizenship ceremony!

170
00:07:23,583 --> 00:07:26,003
Junior Boy Ranger headquarters.

171
00:07:26,083 --> 00:07:28,423
Here we go.

172
00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:30,540
Oh, oh, oh! I've heard tales

173
00:07:30,625 --> 00:07:34,165
of this magnificent palace
of boyhood adventure,

174
00:07:34,250 --> 00:07:37,580
but I never dared to hope
I'd one day be here--

175
00:07:37,667 --> 00:07:40,707
the sturdy grandeur
of the gray concrete walls,

176
00:07:40,792 --> 00:07:44,502
the glimmering brass of
the Junior Boy Ranger flagpole,

177
00:07:44,583 --> 00:07:47,253
the wondrous sight of strapping lads

178
00:07:47,333 --> 00:07:50,133
in crisp, neatly pressed uniforms,

179
00:07:50,208 --> 00:07:53,078
thrilling to ghost stories
around the campfire,

180
00:07:53,166 --> 00:07:56,876
tying complicated knots that
will never be used in real life.

181
00:07:56,959 --> 00:07:59,459
It's-- it's a dream come true!

182
00:08:01,583 --> 00:08:03,293
Um, Scott,

183
00:08:03,375 --> 00:08:05,825
we have a good citizenship ceremony

184
00:08:05,917 --> 00:08:07,537
to start, and--

185
00:08:07,625 --> 00:08:10,375
Leonard, you be a good citizen right now

186
00:08:10,458 --> 00:08:12,878
and let me talk to your buddy, okay?

187
00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:14,959
Scott, I'm troop leader
in charge Kenickie.

188
00:08:15,041 --> 00:08:16,381
I'm sure you've heard of me--

189
00:08:16,458 --> 00:08:19,168
Steve Kenickie Life Insurance?
On Elm Street.

190
00:08:19,834 --> 00:08:22,754
Next to the dry cleaners?
Oh, come on, across from--

191
00:08:22,834 --> 00:08:25,384
anyway, would you be interested

192
00:08:25,417 --> 00:08:28,247
in joining the Junior Boy Rangers?

193
00:08:28,458 --> 00:08:30,458
Oh, would I? Would I?

194
00:08:30,542 --> 00:08:33,332
That reminds me of a joke,
a totally insensitive joke

195
00:08:33,458 --> 00:08:36,128
a Junior Boy Ranger should never tell.

196
00:08:36,208 --> 00:08:38,128
Still, the answer is yes!

197
00:08:38,208 --> 00:08:40,458
Yes, I do want to join the rangers.

198
00:08:40,542 --> 00:08:42,582
Ha ha, yes. Ha ha.

199
00:08:42,667 --> 00:08:44,327
I'm a little nervous. Sorry. Yes!

200
00:08:44,417 --> 00:08:46,667
Great. Well, it shouldn't be too hard.

201
00:08:46,750 --> 00:08:49,830
You just have to pass our
ranger-requirements test, and you're in.

202
00:08:49,917 --> 00:08:52,247
Here's your Junior Boy Ranger manual,

203
00:08:52,333 --> 00:08:54,833
and here's some information
on the full range

204
00:08:54,917 --> 00:08:56,747
of life-insurance policies I offer,

205
00:08:56,834 --> 00:09:00,464
just in case your dad cares
about what will happen to you

206
00:09:00,542 --> 00:09:01,752
if he meets with a sudden accident.

207
00:09:01,834 --> 00:09:03,254
Well, have fun.

208
00:09:03,583 --> 00:09:05,293
Sir, yes, sir!

209
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,290
Boy, oh, boy.

210
00:09:09,834 --> 00:09:11,544
Ahem. So...

211
00:09:11,625 --> 00:09:14,285
How come I didn't tell you I was going

212
00:09:14,375 --> 00:09:16,825
to my Junior Boy Rangers meeting? Well--

213
00:09:16,917 --> 00:09:19,917
Tut. I understand.
You were afraid I'd come in

214
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:22,670
and do better than you,
just like I did in school.

215
00:09:22,750 --> 00:09:23,920
Ha ha ha!

216
00:09:24,041 --> 00:09:25,881
Boy, you're really taking this hard.

217
00:09:25,959 --> 00:09:27,959
Spot, I didn't tell you because
I knew you'd want to join.

218
00:09:28,041 --> 00:09:29,541
I didn't want you to be crushed

219
00:09:29,625 --> 00:09:31,285
when you found out you couldn't hack it.

220
00:09:31,375 --> 00:09:33,915
Me? Not hack it? Ha!

221
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:36,250
I scoff at you. Hear me scoffing?

222
00:09:36,333 --> 00:09:38,463
Ha! I can hack anything.

223
00:09:38,542 --> 00:09:40,382
Look, Spot, there's a reason

224
00:09:40,458 --> 00:09:42,498
why it's called "Junior Boy Rangers"--

225
00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:45,793
because it's for boys. You're a dog.

226
00:09:45,875 --> 00:09:48,285
There are some things
that dogs just can't do.

227
00:09:48,375 --> 00:09:51,325
Ha ha ha! Whoo!

228
00:09:51,417 --> 00:09:53,747
Ha ha ha ha!

229
00:09:53,834 --> 00:09:56,084
Things dogs can't do.

230
00:09:56,166 --> 00:09:57,996
In case you're forgetting,

231
00:09:58,083 --> 00:10:00,213
I am an unnaturally talented dog,

232
00:10:00,291 --> 00:10:02,791
and just because I have a wet nose

233
00:10:02,875 --> 00:10:05,625
doesn't mean I can't be
a Junior Boy Ranger.

234
00:10:05,709 --> 00:10:07,919
I have just as much right

235
00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:11,080
to wear the old yellow
and lighter yellow as you do.

236
00:10:13,333 --> 00:10:15,423
Okay, that's a pity look. What?

237
00:10:15,500 --> 00:10:17,750
Scott, my Junior Boy Ranger's uniform

238
00:10:17,834 --> 00:10:19,424
is purple and green.

239
00:10:19,500 --> 00:10:23,040
So, purple and green,
yellow and lighter yellow--

240
00:10:23,125 --> 00:10:24,825
it's no big deal.

241
00:10:24,917 --> 00:10:28,747
[crying] Oh, why do dogs
have to be colorblind? Why?

242
00:10:28,834 --> 00:10:30,794
Actually, dogs do have some color vision.

243
00:10:30,875 --> 00:10:33,125
They just don't have
as many color photoreceptors

244
00:10:33,208 --> 00:10:34,288
in the retina as humans.

245
00:10:35,250 --> 00:10:38,960
I got an achievement badge
on how the eye works.

246
00:10:39,041 --> 00:10:41,211
Great. Cheated out of a shot at glory

247
00:10:41,291 --> 00:10:43,631
by a few measly photoreceptors.

248
00:10:43,709 --> 00:10:46,209
It's not just that.
There's a lot of dog things

249
00:10:46,291 --> 00:10:47,501
that could cause trouble for you.

250
00:10:47,583 --> 00:10:48,923
Like what?

251
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,500
I'm not sure if you know this,

252
00:10:51,583 --> 00:10:54,043
but when you camp out,
there's trees everywhere.

253
00:10:54,291 --> 00:10:55,581
[crying]

254
00:10:55,667 --> 00:10:57,207
Don't take it so hard.

255
00:10:57,291 --> 00:10:59,581
There are a lot of things
that you do great.

256
00:10:59,667 --> 00:11:01,667
Yeah, like sniffing other dogs' tails.

257
00:11:01,750 --> 00:11:03,880
Pardon me if I don't hire an airplane

258
00:11:03,959 --> 00:11:06,379
to write that in the sky.

259
00:11:08,333 --> 00:11:09,753
Wait up.

260
00:11:09,834 --> 00:11:11,424
I'm sorry. I didn't realize

261
00:11:11,500 --> 00:11:13,960
you wanted to be
a Junior Boy Ranger that bad.

262
00:11:14,041 --> 00:11:17,171
You mean my little glimmering-
brass-of-the-flagpole routine

263
00:11:17,250 --> 00:11:18,630
didn't spell it out for you?

264
00:11:18,709 --> 00:11:20,249
Anyway, I'm sorry.

265
00:11:20,333 --> 00:11:22,463
And if you really want to join,

266
00:11:22,542 --> 00:11:25,212
I'll help you get in any way I can.

267
00:11:25,291 --> 00:11:27,461
You will? Oh, thank...

268
00:11:27,542 --> 00:11:29,462
On one condition.

269
00:11:29,542 --> 00:11:31,042
...you.

270
00:11:31,125 --> 00:11:33,285
You can't interfere with my preparations

271
00:11:33,375 --> 00:11:35,205
for the Maplewood little-car race.

272
00:11:35,291 --> 00:11:37,711
I really want to win it this year.

273
00:11:37,792 --> 00:11:39,212
Agreed!

274
00:11:40,041 --> 00:11:41,961
You won't regret this, Leonard.

275
00:11:42,041 --> 00:11:44,421
And that statement was not
ironic foreshadowing.

276
00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:47,130
I guarantee it. That wasn't one, either.

277
00:11:48,417 --> 00:11:50,037
Look out, world,

278
00:11:50,125 --> 00:11:53,035
there's a new boy ranger in town!

279
00:11:53,125 --> 00:11:56,625
Yeah! [howling]

280
00:11:56,709 --> 00:11:59,459
[coughs] Ahem. Uh, ha ha.

281
00:11:59,542 --> 00:12:01,422
Yay.

282
00:12:17,417 --> 00:12:21,247
"So you want to become
a Junior Boy Ranger."

283
00:12:21,333 --> 00:12:24,253
"So you want to enter
the Junior Boy Ranger

284
00:12:24,333 --> 00:12:26,173
Maplewood little-car race."

285
00:12:26,250 --> 00:12:29,750
"So you want to learn how
to regurgitate creamy corn."

286
00:12:29,834 --> 00:12:33,384
What? Only you guys are allowed

287
00:12:33,458 --> 00:12:35,378
to read to yourselves?

288
00:12:35,458 --> 00:12:38,128
Hmph.

289
00:12:39,834 --> 00:12:41,174
Leonard, I need your help.

290
00:12:41,250 --> 00:12:43,420
I can move the rear axle

291
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:46,330
a little more forward this year.

292
00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:48,827
I've whittled down my ranger requirements

293
00:12:48,917 --> 00:12:51,667
to the final 10, but I'm not totally sure

294
00:12:51,750 --> 00:12:54,210
if they'll give me in trouble in the...

295
00:12:54,291 --> 00:12:55,831
Og-day epartment-day.

296
00:12:55,917 --> 00:12:58,207
[sighs]

297
00:12:58,291 --> 00:12:59,631
I mean, number five is

298
00:12:59,709 --> 00:13:01,879
"help a senior citizen in your community,"

299
00:13:01,959 --> 00:13:04,039
which is a snap, but if said senior

300
00:13:04,125 --> 00:13:05,875
has a cat, then all bets are off.

301
00:13:05,959 --> 00:13:08,629
Any time you feel
like keeping your promise

302
00:13:08,709 --> 00:13:10,789
and helping me, just jump in.

303
00:13:10,875 --> 00:13:13,375
You promised you wouldn't interfere

304
00:13:13,458 --> 00:13:14,708
with my getting ready for the race.

305
00:13:14,792 --> 00:13:16,252
Okay!

306
00:13:20,291 --> 00:13:23,171
Look, Scott, I've been
helping you all week.

307
00:13:23,250 --> 00:13:25,540
Now it's my time to get ready
for the race.

308
00:13:25,625 --> 00:13:27,375
I have to make a better car this year.

309
00:13:27,458 --> 00:13:30,248
I can't decide
which requirements to choose.

310
00:13:30,333 --> 00:13:32,173
I told you it wouldn't be easy.

311
00:13:32,250 --> 00:13:34,540
Oh, no! No, don't trot out the old

312
00:13:34,625 --> 00:13:38,125
"you can't do it 'cause you're
a you-know-what" bit again.

313
00:13:38,208 --> 00:13:41,128
I'm proud of who I am
and what I'm capable of.

314
00:13:41,208 --> 00:13:42,878
This is one... dog...

315
00:13:42,959 --> 00:13:45,919
Who can become a Junior Boy Ranger

316
00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:47,500
without any boy's help.

317
00:13:47,583 --> 00:13:49,713
I even bet I can complete
all 10 of my requirements

318
00:13:49,792 --> 00:13:53,042
before you finish your
precious wooden doodle bug.

319
00:13:53,125 --> 00:13:56,455
You're on. And don't call it a doodle bug.

320
00:13:56,542 --> 00:13:59,332
Good! I'll show you I don't need any help,

321
00:13:59,417 --> 00:14:02,917
and I-I-I don't need help
with this, either.

322
00:14:06,291 --> 00:14:07,921
[applause]

323
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:10,250
Thank you. Thank you.

324
00:14:10,333 --> 00:14:13,883
Hey, that's not sincere applause.

325
00:14:13,959 --> 00:14:17,999
♪ We're the Junior Boy Rangers,
Brave and true ♪

326
00:14:18,083 --> 00:14:22,173
♪ And we take pride
In everything we do ♪

327
00:14:22,250 --> 00:14:25,460
♪ To a code of honor
We're forever bound ♪

328
00:14:25,542 --> 00:14:29,712
♪ We're as strong and healthy
As our minds are sound ♪

329
00:14:29,792 --> 00:14:32,582
♪ We're not afraid
To face adversity ♪

330
00:14:32,667 --> 00:14:33,877
Aah!

331
00:14:33,959 --> 00:14:37,079
♪ We're well-equipped
With ingenuity ♪

332
00:14:38,083 --> 00:14:42,043
♪ We are courteous and clean,
A well-oiled machine ♪

333
00:14:42,125 --> 00:14:45,995
♪ We're the Junior Boy Rangers
Of the purple ♪

334
00:14:46,083 --> 00:14:48,583
♪ And green ♪

335
00:14:48,667 --> 00:14:50,287
♪ Purple and green ♪

336
00:14:50,375 --> 00:14:53,245
♪ We're the Junior Boy Rangers,
Brave and true ♪

337
00:14:53,333 --> 00:14:59,043
♪ And we take pride
In everything we do ♪

338
00:14:59,125 --> 00:15:01,785
♪ To a code of honor
We're forever bound ♪

339
00:15:01,875 --> 00:15:06,325
♪ We're as strong and healthy
As our minds are sound ♪

340
00:15:06,458 --> 00:15:09,628
♪ We're not afraid
To face adversity ♪

341
00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:13,419
♪ We're well-equipped
With ingenuity ♪

342
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:17,920
♪ We are courteous and clean,
A well-oiled machine ♪

343
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:21,880
♪ We're the junior boy rangers
Of the purple ♪

344
00:15:21,959 --> 00:15:24,499
♪ And green ♪

345
00:15:24,583 --> 00:15:26,463
♪ Purple and green ♪

346
00:15:35,500 --> 00:15:37,210
Guess what, Lenny.

347
00:15:37,333 --> 00:15:39,463
I've only got one requirement left--

348
00:15:39,542 --> 00:15:42,082
"do a good deed
without asking for a reward."

349
00:15:42,166 --> 00:15:44,496
That seems to defeat
the purpose, but what the hay?

350
00:15:44,625 --> 00:15:47,995
How goes the big racecar, bunky?

351
00:15:48,083 --> 00:15:51,463
[snoring]

352
00:15:51,542 --> 00:15:54,042
Ah, how sweet, albeit pathetic.

353
00:15:55,709 --> 00:15:58,629
Now, where does he keep his paintbrushes?

354
00:15:58,709 --> 00:16:00,629
Ew.

355
00:16:00,709 --> 00:16:03,169
Where doesn't he keep his paintbrushes?

356
00:16:03,250 --> 00:16:05,790
This boy could use a lesson
or two in organization.

357
00:16:06,834 --> 00:16:08,384
"Ew" again.

358
00:16:08,500 --> 00:16:11,830
Not the cutest rear-axle
assembly I ever saw.

359
00:16:11,917 --> 00:16:13,127
Oh, well.

360
00:16:13,208 --> 00:16:15,998
Wait a minute. I'll do my good deed

361
00:16:16,125 --> 00:16:17,915
by helping Leonard with his car.

362
00:16:18,041 --> 00:16:19,831
I'll just spread the genius
around a little,

363
00:16:19,959 --> 00:16:22,169
bring him up to my level.

364
00:16:22,250 --> 00:16:25,750
This just needs to be adjusted
a bit around the flanges.

365
00:16:25,834 --> 00:16:28,254
Mm-hmm, add a tiny dab of paint

366
00:16:28,333 --> 00:16:30,833
to make it look spick-spot.

367
00:16:30,917 --> 00:16:32,667
Maybe a nice...

368
00:16:34,458 --> 00:16:35,708
Yellow.

369
00:16:40,083 --> 00:16:42,833
Just a jot more yellow, and voilà.

370
00:16:43,875 --> 00:16:45,325
Perfect.

371
00:16:45,375 --> 00:16:47,705
Now to clean up.

372
00:16:47,792 --> 00:16:50,132
A Junior Boy Ranger is always neat.

373
00:16:50,208 --> 00:16:52,958
The cap for the yellow paint
goes on the yellow-paint bottle.

374
00:16:53,959 --> 00:16:55,879
Green? Heh heh.

375
00:16:55,959 --> 00:16:57,919
Oh, here's the yellow.

376
00:16:58,166 --> 00:16:59,206
Indigo?

377
00:16:59,291 --> 00:17:01,041
Oh, that's--

378
00:17:01,125 --> 00:17:03,075
that's a fancy name for yellow, isn't it?

379
00:17:03,166 --> 00:17:04,286
Isn't it?

380
00:17:04,375 --> 00:17:06,125
Okay, don't panic, don't panic.

381
00:17:06,208 --> 00:17:07,248
Just-- just find the yellow.

382
00:17:19,417 --> 00:17:22,537
Aah! Okay.

383
00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:25,627
Okay, just wipe it off. You can do it.

384
00:17:25,750 --> 00:17:27,670
Now where's that car?

385
00:17:27,792 --> 00:17:30,502
It was-- it was just here a second ago.

386
00:17:32,709 --> 00:17:34,419
Aah! Aah!

387
00:17:34,500 --> 00:17:37,460
Come back here! Come back here!
Come back here!

388
00:17:37,542 --> 00:17:39,042
Yaah!

389
00:17:40,333 --> 00:17:42,713
[panting]

390
00:17:46,959 --> 00:17:48,129
[birds chirping]

391
00:17:48,208 --> 00:17:50,998
Hey, you, come back here!

392
00:17:51,333 --> 00:17:55,463
Ha ha ha! Well, well, monsieur.

393
00:17:55,542 --> 00:17:56,422
[crash]

394
00:17:56,500 --> 00:17:59,040
[both laughing]

395
00:17:59,125 --> 00:18:01,285
I love these old classic cartoons.

396
00:18:01,375 --> 00:18:03,205
I can't believe they're so violent.

397
00:18:03,291 --> 00:18:05,751
Yeah, they don't make them
like this anymore.

398
00:18:05,834 --> 00:18:09,384
Now I've got you, you lousy squirrel.

399
00:18:09,458 --> 00:18:11,918
Hey, whoa. How come
the squirrel's still alive?

400
00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:13,080
His head's way over there.

401
00:18:13,166 --> 00:18:15,166
'Cause it's a cartoon.

402
00:18:15,250 --> 00:18:18,170
-Gophers can't really talk, you know.
-Oh, yeah.

403
00:18:18,250 --> 00:18:19,880
[crash]

404
00:18:21,375 --> 00:18:22,955
I think it's coming from in there.

405
00:18:23,041 --> 00:18:24,541
You're hearing things, pal.

406
00:18:24,625 --> 00:18:25,915
There ain't no mouse in here.

407
00:18:28,709 --> 00:18:31,539
Only one dead dog.

408
00:18:31,625 --> 00:18:33,455
Very funny.

409
00:18:33,542 --> 00:18:35,502
Spot, do you know what you've done?

410
00:18:35,583 --> 00:18:37,463
Of course I know what I've done.

411
00:18:37,542 --> 00:18:39,422
You've ruined Leonard's racecar.

412
00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:42,040
I know I've ruined Leonard's racecar.

413
00:18:42,125 --> 00:18:43,875
And the big race is this morning!

414
00:18:43,959 --> 00:18:45,459
I know the big race--

415
00:18:45,542 --> 00:18:47,672
The big race is this morning?

416
00:18:47,792 --> 00:18:48,672
Oh, no!

417
00:18:51,417 --> 00:18:53,707
My car! It's ruined!

418
00:18:53,792 --> 00:18:55,002
What happened?

419
00:18:55,083 --> 00:18:58,083
Well, Pretty Boy and I were watching

420
00:18:58,166 --> 00:19:00,126
a particularly amusing episode

421
00:19:00,208 --> 00:19:02,878
of "The Loony Gopher Show," and--

422
00:19:04,875 --> 00:19:07,245
This is all my fault, Leonard.

423
00:19:07,375 --> 00:19:09,455
Leonard, this is kind of awkward.

424
00:19:09,542 --> 00:19:11,752
Could you take me down from here?

425
00:19:11,875 --> 00:19:14,625
Aah!

426
00:19:14,709 --> 00:19:15,669
Thank you.

427
00:19:15,750 --> 00:19:18,040
This is all my fault, Leonard!

428
00:19:18,166 --> 00:19:20,626
I wanted to do my last ranger requirement

429
00:19:20,709 --> 00:19:22,169
by helping you,

430
00:19:22,250 --> 00:19:25,290
but I got the colors confused
and my tail in the way.

431
00:19:25,417 --> 00:19:27,747
You were right.
A dog can't be a boy ranger.

432
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:30,674
I have no business wearing...

433
00:19:30,750 --> 00:19:33,670
The one color and the other color.

434
00:19:36,208 --> 00:19:37,498
Ohh...

435
00:19:38,041 --> 00:19:40,041
Don't be so hard on yourself, Spot.

436
00:19:40,125 --> 00:19:42,665
So you figured out
you've got some limitations.

437
00:19:42,750 --> 00:19:45,460
Big deal. It's too bad they ruined

438
00:19:45,542 --> 00:19:48,002
the one thing I care about most,
but what can you do?

439
00:19:48,083 --> 00:19:51,713
Easy for you to say. Your dog hair isn't
glued to a block of wood.

440
00:19:51,792 --> 00:19:55,002
No, but my limitations
are everywhere, too.

441
00:19:55,083 --> 00:19:57,633
I was obsessed with making
a great racecar,

442
00:19:57,709 --> 00:19:59,289
but I had no clue how to do it.

443
00:19:59,375 --> 00:20:00,875
You may not know this,

444
00:20:00,959 --> 00:20:03,459
but I'm not very well-organized.

445
00:20:03,542 --> 00:20:06,422
Uh, yeah, I noticed.

446
00:20:07,417 --> 00:20:08,827
Ahem!

447
00:20:08,959 --> 00:20:10,629
I got limitations, too,

448
00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:12,999
but shutting up isn't one of them.

449
00:20:13,083 --> 00:20:15,383
Maybe if you mopes concentrated

450
00:20:15,458 --> 00:20:18,538
on what you're good at
and worked together,

451
00:20:18,625 --> 00:20:21,375
you could fix that car
in time to get to the race.

452
00:20:24,875 --> 00:20:26,575
You're good at organization.

453
00:20:26,709 --> 00:20:29,379
You're good at telling red from blue.

454
00:20:29,667 --> 00:20:31,167
Let's do it!

455
00:20:36,792 --> 00:20:38,882
Man, there's a whole lot of fur on here.

456
00:20:38,959 --> 00:20:40,829
Tell me about it.

457
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:45,960
Ladies and gentlemen, the final results

458
00:20:46,041 --> 00:20:47,881
of the Junior Boy Ranger

459
00:20:47,959 --> 00:20:50,579
Maplewood little-car race are in,

460
00:20:50,667 --> 00:20:54,577
and soon we will know the winner
of the grand-prize package,

461
00:20:54,709 --> 00:20:56,879
courtesy of Steve Kenickie Life Insurance.

462
00:20:56,959 --> 00:21:00,629
On Elm Street. Next to-- oh, forget it.

463
00:21:00,709 --> 00:21:03,709
Well, we had 27 beautiful Maplewood

464
00:21:03,792 --> 00:21:06,502
little-car-race racecars here today,

465
00:21:06,625 --> 00:21:09,705
and when we take away the ones
I, unfortunately,

466
00:21:09,792 --> 00:21:11,672
had to disqualify
for too much parental help,

467
00:21:11,750 --> 00:21:14,630
we're left with our two finalists.

468
00:21:14,709 --> 00:21:17,379
Coming in second is Ian Wazaloseky...

469
00:21:17,458 --> 00:21:19,958
And his Yankee toenail clipper.

470
00:21:20,083 --> 00:21:22,083
[all] Ew!

471
00:21:22,166 --> 00:21:26,536
Don't be so grossed out.
They're not my toenails.

472
00:21:26,667 --> 00:21:28,497
[all] Ew!

473
00:21:28,583 --> 00:21:32,173
And our winner today, with a record time,

474
00:21:32,250 --> 00:21:34,500
is the team teammates car...

475
00:21:43,291 --> 00:21:45,421
Created by Leonard Helperman

476
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:49,040
and our newest junior boy
ranger, Scott Leadready II.

477
00:21:49,166 --> 00:21:50,826
[cheering]

478
00:21:50,959 --> 00:21:53,539
Is my face turning red, or is it just me?

479
00:21:53,625 --> 00:21:54,875
♪ Purple and green ♪