1 00:00:00,333 --> 00:00:01,883 Of the leash 2 00:00:01,959 --> 00:00:04,329 - 3 00:00:08,542 --> 00:00:10,132 - 4 00:00:10,208 --> 00:00:11,788 For a pair of pants 5 00:00:11,875 --> 00:00:14,205 His favorite pastime 6 00:00:14,291 --> 00:00:16,631 For the last time 7 00:00:16,709 --> 00:00:18,039 - 8 00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:31,000 Why can't I be a normal kid like any other? 9 00:00:31,083 --> 00:00:33,083 Now, doodle bug, listen to mother. 10 00:00:35,208 --> 00:00:36,788 I hate dogs. 11 00:00:41,583 --> 00:00:43,503 I do not wish to be a dog. 12 00:00:52,291 --> 00:00:53,461 Yes! 13 00:01:11,625 --> 00:01:14,575 "It is better to have loved and lost 14 00:01:14,667 --> 00:01:17,077 than never to have loved at all." 15 00:01:18,083 --> 00:01:19,673 How many of you were aware 16 00:01:19,750 --> 00:01:21,920 that the English poet Alfred, Lord Tennyson 17 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:24,130 was not the first person to say this? 18 00:01:26,041 --> 00:01:27,541 Uh-huh. Okay. 19 00:01:27,625 --> 00:01:31,375 No, actually William Congreve wrote it in his play 20 00:01:31,458 --> 00:01:36,078 "The Way of The World" a full 150 years earlier. 21 00:01:36,417 --> 00:01:38,287 Well, okay, all right, folks, clue in the teach. 22 00:01:38,375 --> 00:01:40,665 What's so ding, dang, darn fascinating 23 00:01:40,750 --> 00:01:42,580 that you can't even pay attention 24 00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:44,327 to today's English lesson? 25 00:01:44,417 --> 00:01:46,247 Haven't you heard, Mrs. Helperman? 26 00:01:46,333 --> 00:01:48,963 The circus is coming to town. 27 00:01:49,041 --> 00:01:52,461 The circus? I love the circus! 28 00:01:52,542 --> 00:01:54,042 Ha ha ha ha! 29 00:01:55,458 --> 00:01:57,208 Ahem. 30 00:01:57,291 --> 00:02:00,251 But we mustn't forget that this is a school night 31 00:02:00,333 --> 00:02:04,503 and there's still homework, and tonight's homework is... 32 00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:06,883 To enjoy the circus! Yay! 33 00:02:27,041 --> 00:02:28,831 Heh heh heh heh. 34 00:02:40,041 --> 00:02:41,541 Gloriosky! 35 00:02:41,625 --> 00:02:43,285 My first circus. 36 00:02:43,375 --> 00:02:46,075 How the heck could they pack all this fun 37 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:48,536 into one little tent? 38 00:02:48,625 --> 00:02:50,955 Okay, now, hot dogs first, then cotton candy. 39 00:02:51,041 --> 00:02:53,831 I got you orange soda because at least it has the name 40 00:02:53,917 --> 00:02:55,497 of a natural food in it. 41 00:02:55,583 --> 00:02:56,673 Hmm. 42 00:02:56,750 --> 00:03:00,330 It's not really hot, and it's not really a dog. 43 00:03:00,417 --> 00:03:05,127 But still, I just can't bring myself to eat it. 44 00:03:05,208 --> 00:03:06,748 Mmm. Mmm. 45 00:03:06,834 --> 00:03:08,384 Oh, ho ho ho. 46 00:03:08,458 --> 00:03:10,998 Pure sugar! Mmm, and food coloring. 47 00:03:11,083 --> 00:03:12,503 My conscience is clear. 48 00:03:12,583 --> 00:03:14,423 Oh, boy, the clowns! 49 00:03:17,500 --> 00:03:18,750 Toot! 50 00:03:42,166 --> 00:03:44,126 I should have seen that coming! 51 00:03:44,208 --> 00:03:45,878 Ha ha ha ha! 52 00:03:49,375 --> 00:03:52,165 Huh? Oh, no, no, no, no. 53 00:03:52,250 --> 00:03:54,330 I'd rather just watch. 54 00:04:02,166 --> 00:04:04,206 No, please, I-I-- 55 00:04:04,291 --> 00:04:06,211 allow me, oh, red-nosed one. 56 00:04:08,291 --> 00:04:09,171 No! 57 00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:12,330 Thank you. Thank you! It was nothing. 58 00:04:12,417 --> 00:04:15,327 There's a lot of love in this tent, 59 00:04:15,375 --> 00:04:18,665 and we shouldn't be afraid to talk about it. 60 00:04:46,625 --> 00:04:47,785 Oh, Leonard! 61 00:04:47,875 --> 00:04:50,995 Stop, stop! You're killing me! 62 00:04:51,083 --> 00:04:54,383 Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls of all ages, 63 00:04:54,458 --> 00:04:57,328 cast your eyes toward ring number one 64 00:04:57,417 --> 00:04:59,747 for the world-famous Parisian poodle, 65 00:04:59,834 --> 00:05:01,834 the one, the only... 66 00:05:01,917 --> 00:05:04,247 Fifi! 67 00:05:14,583 --> 00:05:16,213 Fifi. 68 00:05:17,792 --> 00:05:22,332 Fifi, you make my heart feel so strong and beefy. 69 00:05:22,417 --> 00:05:24,327 Oh, precious Fifi, 70 00:05:24,417 --> 00:05:27,127 let's fly above the trees so green and leafy. 71 00:05:27,208 --> 00:05:30,918 We'll find relief-y from all our grief-y. 72 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:35,250 But I must be brief-y, do it in a jeefy. 73 00:05:36,834 --> 00:05:39,294 Don't want to hit a reef-y. 74 00:05:39,375 --> 00:05:43,205 For I've no more words to describe 75 00:05:43,291 --> 00:05:45,421 or rhyme with... 76 00:05:45,500 --> 00:05:47,040 Fifi. 77 00:05:47,125 --> 00:05:48,245 Scott? 78 00:05:48,333 --> 00:05:51,043 Um, I think your neighbor would like 79 00:05:51,125 --> 00:05:53,165 to return to his seat, dear. 80 00:05:53,250 --> 00:05:55,130 Huh? Oh. 81 00:05:55,208 --> 00:05:59,288 Uh, ha ha, right. 82 00:05:59,375 --> 00:06:02,625 I guess the circus just makes me a little goofy. 83 00:06:10,959 --> 00:06:11,879 Excuse me, sir. 84 00:06:11,959 --> 00:06:15,999 I mean, ma'am... Uh, sir-a'am. 85 00:06:16,083 --> 00:06:17,213 Will the clowns be coming out soon? 86 00:06:19,125 --> 00:06:20,415 Here they come! 87 00:06:20,500 --> 00:06:23,830 The guys who changed my life forever. 88 00:06:23,917 --> 00:06:26,917 When I grow up, I want to paint my face white, 89 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:28,960 jump out of a car engine, 90 00:06:29,041 --> 00:06:31,961 and spray fizzy water down my pants just like you guys. 91 00:06:32,041 --> 00:06:34,041 When I was your age, 92 00:06:34,125 --> 00:06:35,705 I wanted to grow up to be president. 93 00:06:35,792 --> 00:06:38,172 Boy, the world's changed. 94 00:06:38,250 --> 00:06:41,250 Oh, where is she? Could I possibly have blinked 95 00:06:41,333 --> 00:06:44,753 and missed the world-famous Parisian poodle, 96 00:06:44,834 --> 00:06:46,134 the one, the only... 97 00:06:46,208 --> 00:06:47,538 Fifi? 98 00:06:47,625 --> 00:06:49,535 Oh, woe. 99 00:06:55,125 --> 00:06:57,915 Oh, pardonnez-moi. 100 00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:59,460 No. 101 00:06:59,542 --> 00:07:02,542 Ooh! Oh, uh, no. No. 102 00:07:02,625 --> 00:07:05,415 Pardonnez is all moi. 103 00:07:09,125 --> 00:07:12,205 Allow me, s'il vous plate. 104 00:07:19,250 --> 00:07:21,540 Ooh! 105 00:07:25,750 --> 00:07:27,040 Mon dieu. 106 00:07:27,125 --> 00:07:29,415 Those eyes, it is as if he could see through 107 00:07:29,500 --> 00:07:31,330 to the very essence of my soul, 108 00:07:31,417 --> 00:07:33,417 as if he were not a boy at all, 109 00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:36,460 but an abnormally smart dog, just like myself. 110 00:07:36,542 --> 00:07:39,082 Don't let the human pants I wear deceive you. 111 00:07:39,166 --> 00:07:42,496 I am also an abnormally smart dog, 112 00:07:42,583 --> 00:07:44,923 perhaps even smarter because I know 113 00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,500 that the grammatically preferable usage 114 00:07:47,583 --> 00:07:50,503 is to say "abnormally smart, just like me." 115 00:07:50,583 --> 00:07:54,253 Forgive me. English is my second language. 116 00:07:54,333 --> 00:07:55,383 Mine too. 117 00:07:55,458 --> 00:07:59,078 My first language is the language of love. 118 00:07:59,166 --> 00:08:01,286 Wow, I didn't even think that. 119 00:08:01,375 --> 00:08:03,455 It just came right out of my mouth. 120 00:08:03,542 --> 00:08:05,712 I got all the clowns' autographs! 121 00:08:05,792 --> 00:08:07,212 Ah. 122 00:08:07,291 --> 00:08:09,251 Okay, we can go now. 123 00:08:10,625 --> 00:08:12,455 I have to see you again. 124 00:08:12,542 --> 00:08:15,632 I do two shows tomorrow. The matinee starts at noon. 125 00:08:15,709 --> 00:08:17,879 No, no. I mean... 126 00:08:17,959 --> 00:08:20,379 Oh, ho ho ho. 127 00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:21,458 I see. 128 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:24,832 You're more French than American, hmm? 129 00:08:24,917 --> 00:08:26,247 Oh, ho ho ho. 130 00:08:26,333 --> 00:08:29,833 Meet me tonight, 7:00, behind the elephants' quarters. 131 00:08:29,917 --> 00:08:31,827 How will I know where that is? 132 00:08:31,917 --> 00:08:34,667 Believe me, you'll know. 133 00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:41,670 Mmm, Fifi... 134 00:08:41,750 --> 00:08:44,250 Da-da da-da da-da leafy 135 00:08:46,834 --> 00:08:47,754 Brief-y. 136 00:08:50,375 --> 00:08:51,705 Jeefy. 137 00:08:51,792 --> 00:08:54,882 Ha ha ha. 138 00:08:54,959 --> 00:08:56,499 Reef-y. 139 00:08:56,583 --> 00:08:58,673 Ho ho ho ha ha ha. 140 00:09:00,750 --> 00:09:02,710 Wacko, wacko, wacko. 141 00:09:05,208 --> 00:09:07,788 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 142 00:09:07,875 --> 00:09:08,785 Leonard! 143 00:09:08,875 --> 00:09:10,705 Oh, my soul, are you all right? 144 00:09:10,792 --> 00:09:11,712 Yeah, I'm just practicing my clown routine. 145 00:09:11,792 --> 00:09:13,292 Did you think it was funny? 146 00:09:13,375 --> 00:09:17,415 Funny? If you severely injured your backbone, 147 00:09:17,500 --> 00:09:19,130 ending up hospitalized for weeks, 148 00:09:19,208 --> 00:09:22,208 or worse yet-- I can't even say the word... 149 00:09:22,291 --> 00:09:24,831 Pardon me if I fail to find the humor 150 00:09:24,917 --> 00:09:27,457 in that dreadful scenario of pain and suffering. 151 00:09:27,542 --> 00:09:29,582 I was just trying to get a laugh. 152 00:09:29,667 --> 00:09:30,877 Ah, kid, you're pathetic. 153 00:09:30,959 --> 00:09:34,129 If you want to do a decent pratfall, you got to give it a little this. 154 00:09:36,375 --> 00:09:39,205 Uhh! Bada-boom, bada-bing! 155 00:09:39,291 --> 00:09:41,041 Ha ha ha! 156 00:09:41,125 --> 00:09:42,625 Now, that's funny. 157 00:09:44,959 --> 00:09:46,629 Ha ha! My sides hurt. 158 00:09:48,166 --> 00:09:49,916 Stop! Stop! 159 00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,710 I can't breathe! 160 00:09:51,792 --> 00:09:54,712 Great. My canary's got a scholarship to clown college, 161 00:09:54,792 --> 00:09:56,632 and all I got is a sore butt. 162 00:09:56,709 --> 00:09:59,499 What do ya think, Leonard? With or without the collar? 163 00:09:59,583 --> 00:10:01,173 I want her to know that I'm a dog 164 00:10:01,250 --> 00:10:02,670 but not just a dog. 165 00:10:02,750 --> 00:10:04,170 She's been all over the world, you know, 166 00:10:04,250 --> 00:10:05,710 seen things I've only read about. 167 00:10:05,792 --> 00:10:08,002 I can't believe you're so worked up 168 00:10:08,083 --> 00:10:09,173 about some circus dog. 169 00:10:09,250 --> 00:10:13,630 "Some circus dog"? "Some circus dog"?! 170 00:10:13,709 --> 00:10:15,959 Pally, we've been dog and master for a lot of years, 171 00:10:16,041 --> 00:10:17,421 so I'm going to let that one slide, 172 00:10:17,500 --> 00:10:19,210 but if you ever refer to the girl I love 173 00:10:19,291 --> 00:10:21,961 as "some circus dog" again, 174 00:10:22,041 --> 00:10:23,961 I cannot be held responsible for my actions. 175 00:10:24,041 --> 00:10:26,751 "The girl you love"? What's the big deal? 176 00:10:26,834 --> 00:10:29,294 You saw her once for five minutes. 177 00:10:29,375 --> 00:10:31,075 Oh, I see. I see. 178 00:10:31,166 --> 00:10:33,536 And when the sun breaks through the clouds 179 00:10:33,625 --> 00:10:35,325 on a gray and drizzly day, 180 00:10:35,417 --> 00:10:38,787 and suddenly the sky is filled with that dazzling rainbow, 181 00:10:38,875 --> 00:10:40,375 do you also say, 182 00:10:40,458 --> 00:10:42,078 "eh, what's the big deal?" 183 00:10:42,166 --> 00:10:44,496 I love her! Heaven, help me! 184 00:10:44,583 --> 00:10:47,753 Don't tell me not to live, just-sit-and-putter. 185 00:10:47,834 --> 00:10:50,174 Did you hear that, world? 186 00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:53,540 Oh, what kind of crazy cliché have I become? 187 00:10:53,625 --> 00:10:55,325 Ah, who cares? 188 00:10:55,417 --> 00:11:00,247 I am head over heels for a poodle named Fifi! 189 00:11:00,333 --> 00:11:03,333 Ohh, isn't it romantical? 190 00:11:03,417 --> 00:11:05,207 Don't go there, little brother. 191 00:11:05,291 --> 00:11:07,001 She'll only break your heart 192 00:11:07,083 --> 00:11:09,333 and leave you barking at the moon. 193 00:11:09,417 --> 00:11:11,247 Don't listen to him. 194 00:11:11,333 --> 00:11:13,213 Faint heart ne'er won fair maid. 195 00:11:13,291 --> 00:11:15,381 You don't gain anything worthwhile in life 196 00:11:15,458 --> 00:11:16,958 without taking a risk. 197 00:11:17,041 --> 00:11:19,001 Oh, yeah, this from the cat 198 00:11:19,083 --> 00:11:21,423 who hasn't taken a risk in nine lives. 199 00:11:21,500 --> 00:11:23,420 You may be a green clown, but your heart is as hard 200 00:11:23,500 --> 00:11:26,000 as a dried-up old piece of chow. 201 00:11:26,083 --> 00:11:29,543 Listen to your Jolly. It's love that counts. 202 00:11:29,625 --> 00:11:32,455 I say l'amour, l'amour, 203 00:11:32,542 --> 00:11:34,882 give me more l'amour. 204 00:11:34,959 --> 00:11:36,789 L'amour, shlamore. 205 00:11:36,875 --> 00:11:40,665 I used to think that, about a thousand seed bells ago. 206 00:11:43,834 --> 00:11:45,754 Let me tell you fellas a little story 207 00:11:45,834 --> 00:11:47,964 about how I got run over by love 208 00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:50,081 and left by the side of life's highway 209 00:11:50,166 --> 00:11:52,166 like yesterday's road kill. 210 00:11:54,208 --> 00:11:56,498 Of all the pet shops in all the world, 211 00:11:56,583 --> 00:11:59,713 she had to fly by mine. Her name was Gertie. 212 00:11:59,792 --> 00:12:01,422 She was a goose, 213 00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:03,420 but I was the one who got cooked. 214 00:12:03,500 --> 00:12:06,290 One look from those tiny black eyes of hers, 215 00:12:06,375 --> 00:12:09,245 and I'd have torn my feathers out to make her nest. 216 00:12:09,333 --> 00:12:11,673 But it was over before it began. 217 00:12:11,750 --> 00:12:14,380 She migrated south, don't you know, 218 00:12:14,458 --> 00:12:16,788 and left me walking up my plastic ferris wheel, 219 00:12:16,875 --> 00:12:20,075 lonelier than I ever knew a bird could be. 220 00:12:20,166 --> 00:12:23,246 My advice to you boys, never give your heart to a skirt 221 00:12:23,333 --> 00:12:25,333 who's been hard-wired by mother nature 222 00:12:25,417 --> 00:12:27,707 to fly to Tierra del Fuego every six months. 223 00:12:29,125 --> 00:12:30,625 I'm not crying. 224 00:12:30,709 --> 00:12:33,209 I just got a little piece of millet in my eye. 225 00:12:33,291 --> 00:12:35,291 It's okay, big guy. 226 00:12:35,375 --> 00:12:38,535 Fall down for us again. That'll make you feel better. 227 00:12:41,250 --> 00:12:43,080 Ha ha ha ha! 228 00:12:43,166 --> 00:12:45,456 See? Ha ha ha! 229 00:12:45,542 --> 00:12:47,632 It hurts, but it's a good hurt. 230 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,750 I'm ready, Leonard. Let's go. 231 00:12:56,834 --> 00:12:59,584 What do you mean, "let's"? It's your dog date. 232 00:12:59,667 --> 00:13:01,247 What the heck do you need me for? 233 00:13:01,333 --> 00:13:03,133 I'm-a don't believing my ears here. 234 00:13:03,208 --> 00:13:06,538 You're asking me to set up an orange crate in the alley, 235 00:13:06,625 --> 00:13:08,915 serve dinner to a couple of mutts, 236 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,040 and play the violin? 237 00:13:11,125 --> 00:13:13,665 Just long enough for them to accidentally chew 238 00:13:13,750 --> 00:13:16,580 on the same piece of spaghetti until their lips meet. 239 00:13:16,667 --> 00:13:18,667 Sonny, "A"-- the board of health 240 00:13:18,750 --> 00:13:21,830 would shut me down in three seconds. 241 00:13:21,917 --> 00:13:24,457 "B" - this is a high-class joint. 242 00:13:24,583 --> 00:13:26,923 We don't call it "spaghetti." 243 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,330 We call it "pasta." 244 00:13:28,417 --> 00:13:30,167 And 3-- dogs don't have lips. 245 00:13:30,250 --> 00:13:35,290 That skinny black line, it's-a not a lip. 246 00:13:36,875 --> 00:13:40,625 Sorry. That was the last Italian restaurant in town. 247 00:13:40,709 --> 00:13:42,829 Guess we all just better go home. 248 00:13:42,917 --> 00:13:43,827 Oh, no! 249 00:13:43,917 --> 00:13:46,457 I have waited for this moment all my life. 250 00:13:46,542 --> 00:13:49,752 But, Spot, we've only known each other a few minutes. 251 00:13:49,834 --> 00:13:51,834 Could everyone just knock it off 252 00:13:51,917 --> 00:13:53,417 with the logic already? 253 00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:56,170 I know how I feel! 254 00:13:56,250 --> 00:13:57,710 Come on! 255 00:14:03,875 --> 00:14:05,705 Please, Mr. Mandelbaum, 256 00:14:05,792 --> 00:14:08,332 it would mean a lot to my dog. 257 00:14:08,417 --> 00:14:09,997 Oh! I'll do my clown act for you. 258 00:14:11,792 --> 00:14:13,132 No, Leonard, no! 259 00:14:13,208 --> 00:14:14,418 You'll kill yourself! 260 00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:17,290 It's a bit. 261 00:14:17,709 --> 00:14:19,329 Oh, Daddy, please help him 262 00:14:19,417 --> 00:14:21,537 so he'll stop doing these scary clown things. 263 00:14:39,333 --> 00:14:41,133 Sacre bleu, I must go pack my things. 264 00:14:41,208 --> 00:14:44,708 The circus train leaves at 9:00 sharp. 265 00:14:44,792 --> 00:14:47,632 But we've only known each other a few minutes. 266 00:14:47,709 --> 00:14:49,879 I know I said not to say that before, 267 00:14:49,959 --> 00:14:52,329 but it's true, and it's not enough. 268 00:14:52,417 --> 00:14:54,577 There's so much we have yet to do, Fifi-- 269 00:14:54,667 --> 00:14:57,707 have litters, lots and lots of litters, 270 00:14:57,792 --> 00:14:59,582 grow old together, 271 00:14:59,667 --> 00:15:03,577 have arthritis in our hip joints together, 272 00:15:03,667 --> 00:15:06,787 and share a bowl of senior formula 273 00:15:06,875 --> 00:15:10,875 for less active dogs 274 00:15:10,959 --> 00:15:14,579 as the sun slowly sets in the West. 275 00:15:14,667 --> 00:15:17,287 In my dream 276 00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,415 Oh, Spot, as beautiful as all that sounds, 277 00:15:20,542 --> 00:15:23,082 it took a very long time to say, 278 00:15:23,166 --> 00:15:24,376 and now I really have to run and pack 279 00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:26,750 or I'll miss the circus train for sure. 280 00:15:26,834 --> 00:15:28,924 That's okay. We got to be going anyway. 281 00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:34,290 Au revoir, Mon Cher, l'amour. 282 00:15:35,208 --> 00:15:36,498 Wait! 283 00:15:36,583 --> 00:15:38,833 Come with me, Spot. 284 00:15:38,959 --> 00:15:39,999 Join the circus. 285 00:15:40,083 --> 00:15:43,793 You haven't lived till you've seen the lights 286 00:15:43,875 --> 00:15:45,825 of Tenafly, New Jersey. 287 00:15:45,917 --> 00:15:48,077 Oh, it's happening too fast. 288 00:15:48,166 --> 00:15:49,536 This is all so crazy. 289 00:15:49,667 --> 00:15:52,747 Crazy, Spot, or is it the sanest thing 290 00:15:52,834 --> 00:15:56,634 either one of us has ever done in our crazy lives? 291 00:15:56,709 --> 00:15:59,959 Wow. That should be in a fortune cookie. 292 00:16:00,041 --> 00:16:01,421 No, it's crazy! 293 00:16:01,500 --> 00:16:04,630 Spot is not a circus dog. 294 00:16:04,709 --> 00:16:07,039 He's just a regular dog! 295 00:16:07,125 --> 00:16:09,495 Who, granted, dresses like a boy and goes to school, 296 00:16:09,583 --> 00:16:13,253 but your school is here. Your life is here, 297 00:16:13,333 --> 00:16:17,503 not in Tenafly, New Jersey, or Terre Haute, Indiana, 298 00:16:17,583 --> 00:16:19,503 or Tishomingo, Oklahoma. 299 00:16:19,583 --> 00:16:21,673 How do you know about these places? 300 00:16:21,750 --> 00:16:24,580 They were on the back of this circus popcorn box. 301 00:16:24,709 --> 00:16:26,919 Don't think I haven't dreamed of going there myself... 302 00:16:27,041 --> 00:16:30,171 Someday, when I'm a clown. 303 00:17:07,500 --> 00:17:09,790 A clown? But you are not funny. 304 00:17:09,917 --> 00:17:11,707 I said it was a dream, okay? 305 00:17:11,792 --> 00:17:14,712 Could everyone just please give me a break? 306 00:17:14,792 --> 00:17:16,582 Argh! 307 00:17:16,667 --> 00:17:17,827 The reality is, 308 00:17:17,917 --> 00:17:19,707 Spot and I live here, 309 00:17:19,834 --> 00:17:21,544 and we have school in the morning. 310 00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:22,575 Let's go. 311 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,380 Meet me at the train. 312 00:17:26,917 --> 00:17:27,747 Okay. 313 00:17:53,792 --> 00:17:54,922 Is he really snoring, 314 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,500 or is he fake snoring to out-fake-snore me 315 00:17:57,583 --> 00:18:00,253 in a clever attempt to smoke me out? 316 00:18:01,709 --> 00:18:02,879 Nobody could fake that. 317 00:18:02,959 --> 00:18:04,829 He's got to get those adenoids checked. 318 00:18:10,083 --> 00:18:12,213 Leash... 319 00:18:12,291 --> 00:18:15,041 Rawhide chew... 320 00:18:17,291 --> 00:18:20,381 Good old tennis balls... 321 00:18:21,458 --> 00:18:25,748 Ah, and "The Complete Works of William Shakespeare." 322 00:18:34,834 --> 00:18:36,714 I'll have a large tomato juice 323 00:18:36,792 --> 00:18:38,422 with a raw egg in it. 324 00:18:38,500 --> 00:18:41,000 Pretty Boy, wake up. Spot's leaving. 325 00:18:41,083 --> 00:18:44,673 What? Only one thing gets a guy up at this hour-- 326 00:18:44,750 --> 00:18:47,880 la femme fatale. 327 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:51,500 I told Fifi I'd meet her at the circus train at 8:00. 328 00:18:51,583 --> 00:18:55,293 I wish I had a sunflower seed for every time I've heard that. 329 00:18:55,375 --> 00:18:56,745 Spot, are you sure? 330 00:18:56,834 --> 00:18:59,134 It's so dangerous and forbidden... 331 00:18:59,208 --> 00:19:00,918 And absolutely romantical. 332 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,500 What are you talking? It's lunacy! 333 00:19:03,583 --> 00:19:06,253 Leaving everything and everyone you love 334 00:19:06,333 --> 00:19:08,793 to run off with some French dish, 335 00:19:08,875 --> 00:19:09,875 travel the world, 336 00:19:09,959 --> 00:19:13,039 smell the greasepaint, hear the applause. 337 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,500 You wouldn't happen to have room for a small bird, would you? 338 00:19:17,583 --> 00:19:19,463 I don't eat much, and I got a lot of great jokes. 339 00:19:19,583 --> 00:19:23,713 Sorry, pretty boy, but like Charles A. Lindbergh 340 00:19:23,792 --> 00:19:26,672 in the first nonstop flight from New York to Paris, 341 00:19:26,750 --> 00:19:28,170 I got to fly solo on this one. 342 00:19:28,250 --> 00:19:31,790 Hey, you big scaredy-cat, you keep Leonard's belly warm 343 00:19:31,875 --> 00:19:33,375 when he's watching TV, you hear? 344 00:19:33,458 --> 00:19:36,538 Yeah. I promise, but I can't say sometimes 345 00:19:36,625 --> 00:19:40,325 it won't be a little moist from my tears. 346 00:19:41,375 --> 00:19:44,825 And you, you blustery little bag of feathers, 347 00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:48,877 you better keep singing a happy tune when I'm gone. 348 00:19:50,083 --> 00:19:53,213 This darn millet seed just gets everywhere. 349 00:19:53,291 --> 00:19:55,881 I think I'll miss you most of all. 350 00:19:55,959 --> 00:19:59,039 I can't do it. I can't leave Leonard 351 00:19:59,125 --> 00:20:02,035 for some girl I just met for a few minutes. 352 00:20:02,125 --> 00:20:04,455 What? What's going on? 353 00:20:04,542 --> 00:20:06,752 No time to explain. 354 00:20:06,834 --> 00:20:09,714 You got to get dressed, go to the train station, 355 00:20:09,792 --> 00:20:11,382 and deliver a message for me. 356 00:20:11,458 --> 00:20:12,958 I'd take it myself, 357 00:20:13,041 --> 00:20:16,421 but it would just hurt us both too much. 358 00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:20,540 Oh, of all the circus tents in all the fairgrounds 359 00:20:20,625 --> 00:20:23,705 in all the 2-bit towns in the world, 360 00:20:23,792 --> 00:20:25,712 why did she have to jump 361 00:20:25,792 --> 00:20:28,252 through the ring of fire in mine? 362 00:20:29,959 --> 00:20:33,999 Even though Spot can't go to Tishomingo with you tonight, 363 00:20:34,083 --> 00:20:36,253 part of his heart will be there, 364 00:20:36,333 --> 00:20:39,003 and in Tenafly and Tonawanda and... 365 00:20:39,083 --> 00:20:42,463 All the rest of these other places. 366 00:20:42,583 --> 00:20:45,543 All aboard! Whoo-whoo! 367 00:20:45,667 --> 00:20:47,577 No, wait! 368 00:20:47,667 --> 00:20:50,787 I have a message! 369 00:20:50,875 --> 00:20:52,035 Dang. 370 00:20:53,834 --> 00:20:55,424 Tell me, did you tell her? 371 00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:58,040 What did she tell you? No, don't tell me. 372 00:20:58,125 --> 00:21:00,535 I can tell just by looking at your face. 373 00:21:01,542 --> 00:21:04,502 Your face tells me nothing! Tell me!! 374 00:21:04,583 --> 00:21:06,133 She-- she-- 375 00:21:06,208 --> 00:21:08,918 She didn't take it well, did she? 376 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:12,830 She left on that train without saying a word. 377 00:21:12,917 --> 00:21:15,997 Ooh, sweet pain. 378 00:21:16,166 --> 00:21:18,246 Well, as Alfred, Lord Tennyson 379 00:21:18,333 --> 00:21:22,543 and/or William Congreve once so wisely said, 380 00:21:22,625 --> 00:21:25,785 "It is much better to have loved and lost..." 381 00:21:31,375 --> 00:21:32,915 Aah! 382 00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:36,829 "Than never to have loved at all." 383 00:21:36,917 --> 00:21:39,957 Ahh. I shall never forget her. 384 00:21:40,041 --> 00:21:43,291 And I know she'll never forget you.