Uncle: Ah, the city of fengdu,
uncle's hometown.
Uncle cannot believe
this is last time he will ever see it.
Jackie: Oh, that must mark
how high the flood waters will rise
when the new dam is finished.
Tohru: Everything will be submerged?
Uncle: The original birthplace of the chan family,
gone forever.
That is why uncle needed to come,
and that is why the two of you needed to join me.
(Music playing)
Jade: Hey!
Uncle: Turn off racket and listen to uncle!
This is your history.
Jade: Yeah, ancient history. Give it back!
Uncle: You are stubborn as mule!
Jade: I am not stubborn! I'm independent!
Uncle: Oh!
Jade: Now what am I supposed to listen to?
Uncle: How about uncle?
Tohru: Sensei, what is that?
Uncle: Ai-yah!
Mingshan temple.
Dark magic.
Legendary home to ancient mirror spirits...
Evil tricksters
who make your worst fears about yourself come true.
Jade: Big deal. I'm spending my vacation here.
My worst fear has already come true.
Spirits: Help!
Help!
Spirit #1: Help! Somebody!
Spirit #2: We're starving! We need light!
Spirit #3: Release us now!
Lead spirit: Quiet, fools!
Spirit #3: How else are we supposed to get a human's attention?
We need physical hosts to escape this mirror, remember?
Spirit #2: Yeah, - and we'll be underwater soon.
Spirit #1: And I can't swim.
Lead spirit: Patience.
I sense that. The means of our freedom
are drawing very near.
(Spirits laugh)
Uncle: House was here. School was here.
Best place for noodle in city was here.
So, what do you think of uncle's old stomping grounds?
Jade: Tch. Looks more like it was stomped into the ground.
Jackie: Uncle, I read that most of fengdu's sacred buildings
were moved to higher ground.
Why did they leave the mingshan temple here?
Uncle: Nothing sacred about mingshan.
Even small children were taught never to go inside.
Imprisoned mirror spirits are very crafty...
Will take over your body
and make your worst fears a reality.
Jade: Sounds like one of those urban legend things
they tell kids to make them behave.
Uncle: In uncle's day, children behave regardless...
Unlike now.
Jade: Hrmph.
Jackie: Uh...
Perhaps we should visit the temple anyway.
There may be artifacts inside worth preserving.
Uncle: Thank you, big-headed know-it-all, for your input,
but I think uncle knows more
about mingshan temple than you.
Some things are better left at the bottom of the river.
Now, as I was saying,
third cousin once-removed house was there.
He still owes uncle money.
Spirits: Help!
Help!
Jackie: Tohru, do you think uncle is right?
Am I a big-headed know-it-all?
Jade?
Jade: Hello?
Spirits: Help!
Jade: Who's there?
Spirits: Help!
Help!
Tohru: Jade!
Jackie: Where are you?
Uncle: Touch nothing!
Were uncle's lips not moving?
Did words about temple not come out of uncle's mouth?
Why no one ever listen to uncle?
Jackie: Uhh. We weren't ignoring you,
but we have to find Jade.
Perhaps we should split up...
Unless you think I'm being a know-it-all again.
Uncle: Touch nothing else, big head.
Spirits: Help!
Help!
Jade: Uh, someone in here?
Spirit #1: This way!
Spirit #2: That's right!
Lead spirit: You!
Yes, you, young lady.
Over here.
Jade: Whoa! Uncle wasn't kidding.
You guys are. The evil mirror spirits.
Spirit #3: Evil? We're not evil.
(Jade gasps)
Lead spirit: No, don't! Wait! Please!
We are not evil, little one. We're good...
Good spirits unjustly trapped for centuries,
waiting for someone brave and kind enough
to smash this prison and set us free.
Jade: That's not what I heard.
Spirit #3: Lies!
Spirit #2: You heard wrong!
Spirit #1: I couldn't hear. What'd she hear?
Lead spirit: I assure you, we mean no harm.
Our only purpose is to Grant wishes.
Jade: Yeah, right.
Lead spirit: Well, if you're going to be
a stubborn mule about it...
Spirits: Stubborn mule! Stubborn mule! Stubborn mule!
Jade: Stop it!
Tohru: Jade!
Jade: What?
Tohru: Uncle warned you not to come inside the temple.
It's too dangerous.
Jade: Like I haven't seen danger before.
Stop being so over-protective.
You're starting to act like your mom.
Tohru: I am not like my mother.
Spirit #1: Just like your mother!
Spirit #2: Who's your mommy?
Spirit #3: Mother, may I?
(Tohru shudders)
Spirits: Light!
Jade: We can't let the mirror break!
The spirits will get out!
(Jade gasps)
Tohru: Look out!
Uncle: Aah!
Uncle: Dark magic!
Why does uncle bother speaking?
Lead spirit: No!
Jade: Tohru! Behind you!
(Both grunt)
Uncle: Ai-yaah!
Protect the mirror!
Lead spirit: Ignorant creatures!
We will not be denied!
(Tohru grunts)
Uncle: Does no one have ears?
Mirror must not shatter!
Jackie: Ohh! Bad day!
(Jackie panting)
(Spirits laughing)
(Jackie screams)
(Spirit #1 laughs)
(Jade shudders)
(Spirit #3 laughs)
(Tohru shudders)
(Spirit #2 laughs)
Jackie: Ohh...
(Lead spirit laughs)
(Uncle mute)
(All scream)
All: What?
Jade: Oh, no! I'm a mule! A stubborn mule!
Jackie: My head... it's huge!
Tohru, mother's voice: I'm turning into my mother.
(Uncle claps)
Jade: It's like somebody hit uncle's mute button.
Tohru: Ah. Sometimes wishes do come true.
Jackie: (Gasps) The mirror spirits...
They're making our worst fears about ourselves come true!
Everybody out! Go, go, go!
(Jackie strains)
(Tohru grunts)
Jackie: Something tells me I'm fortunate
I did not hear that.
Aw, uncle, please stop staring and tell us
how to remove the mirror spirits from inside us.
Jade: Hey, I kind of like uncle this way.
Hee-haw!
At least I'm not a mime.
Why don't you walk against the wind or something?
Jackie: Aw! All right, both of you!
You're giving me a headache... A big one!
Don't even think about it.
Here, uncle.
Whatever you know, write it down.
Tohru: This is nonsense!
Just like everything that used to come out of your mouth!
Jackie: Wait! This is the scroll I picked up inside the temple.
Maybe it will tell us something.
Tohru: It says that the mirror spirits
not only mutate their human hosts,
but that the hosts can then spread the fear and chaos simply by touch,
moving from one person to the next and so on.
Throughout the world!
Jackie: (Gasps) So how do we stop them?
Tohru: Patience! Unless spirits are expelled from hosts
and recaptured in the mirror with a binding spell,
the mutations will become permanent!
Jade: Permanent?!
Jackie: We have a piece of the mirror.
That's a good start. What about the spell?
Tohru: It is not on the scroll.
Jade: Either uncle knows the spell or he has to use the bathroom.
Uh, I know! Act it out, uncle, like in charades!
Jackie: Oh, the mountain temple!
Jade: We need to go to a bullfight?
Jackie: Antennae! We need some kind of bug?
Tohru: The junk man dances like sick chicken.
Jackie: Unh, uncle, please, stay focused!
Jade: A cricket?
It's got to be a cricket from the mountain temple, right?
Jade: Yes!
Jackie: Is that all, uncle?
Yes, I know my head is as big as that statue!
Very kind of you to point that out.
Jade: You want us to get something from the top of the statue?
Jackie: Oh, ok, sounds like...
Jade: Throw!
Jackie: Hurl! Fling! Toss!
Jade: Sounds like toss?
Tohru: You toss like a little girl!
Jackie: Yaah! Stop it!
We do not have time for your bickering, tohru!
Uh, tohru's mom! Oh, forget it!
Boss? Cross? Floss?
Aaah! Oh!
Uggh! Moss?
We need moss from the top of the ghost king's statue!
Jackie: Ooh! Bad day, bad day, bad day!
Spirit #2: Hee hee hee!
Yeow! Unh!
Jade: Hey, Jackie!
Jackie: Jade? How did you get up here?
Jade: Duh!
Took the tram.
I'm stubborn, not stupid.
Tohru: Why you overpay for rusty old cricket cage?
I did much better job
negotiating. New headphones for Jade.
(Cricket chirping)
(Tohru laughs)
Tohru: You call that cricket catching?
You couldn't catch a cold!
Boy: You're so greedy!
Brother: Stop being so jealous all the time!
Boy: Am not!
Brother: Are, too! Aah!
Man: Ohh, - I was afraid of this.
I knew I shouldn't have had szechuan chicken for lunch.
Ohh, bad heartburn!
Man: Hey, get away from my cart!
Ohh, feels like my stomach's on fire!
Jade: Hee-haw! Jackie, look!
There's the moss uncle needs for the spell!
Jackie: Ohhh!
Jade: Whoa there, humpty dumpty.
Here, I better do it. Give me a boost.
Jackie: Ooh! Watch where you're stepping!
Jade: I would, but I can't see anything
with your overstuffed cabesa in the way.
Almost got it!
Uh-oh!
(Braying)
Jackie: Aah, Jade! Watch where you're kicking!
Jade: Please, Jackie, hold still!
Got it!
Both: Whoa!
Aah!
Both: Aaaaaah!
Unh!
Both: Whew!
Both: Aah!
Unh!
Ohhhh!
Unh!
Jackie: Unh! - Jade, are you all right?
Jade: I think I swallowed the moss. Ptoo!
Oh, no, wait! There it is! Hee-haw!
Tohru: Ha! In your face, junk seller!
Tohru: Now you're going to throw a tantrum?
What?!
Tohru: Aah!
Jackie: Uncle!
Jackie: The mirror spirits are spreading their fear!
You weren't supposed to touch anyone!
Jade: If they reach the mainland, they'll infect the whole city!
And then who knows? Like, all of China?
Jade: Nothing's happening.
Tohru: That's because the old windbag is nothing but wind!
(Mumbling)
Jackie: Uncle, please, this is no time to fight!
Jade: No, listen!
Uncle's moving tohru's lips to chant the binding spell!
(Tohru chanting)
Spirit #2: Ohhh!
Spirit #1: Yaiii!
Lead spirit: Roarrr!
Spirit #3: Baaah!
Tohru: Uh, sensei, àwhile I was my mother,
uh, well, I'm sorry.
Uncle: Not now, tohru! Jackie, the mirror!
(All screaming)
(All grunt)
Spirit #2: What are we going to do?
Lead spirit: Do not fear!
Below us lies our passage to freedom!
The world will be ours
and chaos will reign for all eternity!
(All laughing)
Uncle: Jackie, mirror spirits must not reach ship!
Jackie: But the mirror shard, it's gone!
Jade: Uncle, will the binding spell work with anything that reflects?
Uncle: It is possible. Why?
Jade: Jackie!
(Uncle chanting)
Jackie: The disk must be full.
We need more reflective objects!
Tohru: What? My mom left it behind during her last trip.
(Uncle chanting)
Spirit #2: Owww!
Spirit #3: Aaah!
Jade: 3 down, 1 to go!
Go, Jackie! Go, Jackie!
All: Aaaah!
Jackie: Ohh!
(Gasping)
Lead spirit: You're too late!
Jade: Oh, yeah? Well, in your face, mirror boy!
Lead spirit: Aah!
Jade: But, hey, I guess I'm just stubborn that way.
Jackie: These will be safe back at section 13.
Jade: Too bad we can't come back to fengdo.
This place turned out to be a lot more exiting than I thought it'd be.
Sorry, uncle, I guess I should have been listening.
Jackie: Me, too.
Uncle: Apologies accepted.
But tohru is another story!
Mirror spirits turn you into mother
is no excuse for the way you talk to uncle,
especially when nobody can hear uncle's snappy comebacks!
Jade: Hey, Jackie, did you have any imaginary friends as a child?
Jackie: Actually, I don't.
Especially when I was in the school.
We had, like, a hundred students.
We sleep together, we eat together,
we play, we're training together,
so I actually don't,
because of so many martial artist sisters and brothers.