1 00:00:05,971 --> 00:00:07,039 Hyah! 2 00:00:07,041 --> 00:00:08,107 Aah! 3 00:00:10,276 --> 00:00:11,910 (Exhales) 4 00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:14,179 Not bad, Mickey, 5 00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:16,115 but your form needs work. 6 00:00:16,117 --> 00:00:18,484 Spar with, uh, someone else 7 00:00:18,486 --> 00:00:20,652 while I confer with captain black. 8 00:00:26,459 --> 00:00:28,460 Sorry about the hard knocks, my friend, 9 00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:32,331 but since section 13's officially out of the dark hand business, 10 00:00:32,333 --> 00:00:36,168 I had to devise a way to justify your overhead to my superiors. 11 00:00:36,170 --> 00:00:38,971 Did you put me on the books as personal trainer, 12 00:00:38,973 --> 00:00:40,773 or punching bag? 13 00:00:40,775 --> 00:00:41,840 Jade: Hyah-ha! 14 00:00:41,842 --> 00:00:42,908 (Gasps) 15 00:00:42,910 --> 00:00:43,976 Jade! 16 00:00:43,978 --> 00:00:45,477 What? 17 00:00:45,478 --> 00:00:49,548 Oh, I, uh, told Mickey to work on that form. 18 00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,670 Shendu: Ah, ah... 19 00:01:44,672 --> 00:01:46,071 Gingerly. 20 00:01:46,073 --> 00:01:49,108 Watch your step. 21 00:01:49,110 --> 00:01:51,309 Place it over to the left... 22 00:01:51,312 --> 00:01:53,445 Valmont: And into the incinerator. 23 00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:55,347 We could use some firewood. 24 00:01:55,349 --> 00:01:56,515 Shendu: Silence! 25 00:01:56,517 --> 00:01:59,551 With some sprucing, this fish heap 26 00:01:59,553 --> 00:02:02,855 will be worthy of housing a demon sorcerer-- 27 00:02:02,857 --> 00:02:05,858 valmont: Ex-demon sorcerer. 28 00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:08,260 Shendu: - I may be vanquished, 29 00:02:08,262 --> 00:02:11,063 but I am still in charge, valmont, 30 00:02:11,065 --> 00:02:12,931 as you can well see. 31 00:02:12,933 --> 00:02:16,401 Valmont: - This is my hideout, and my body, shendu. 32 00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:17,736 Which reminds me, 33 00:02:17,738 --> 00:02:20,606 I have a change of wardrobe in mind for us. 34 00:02:20,608 --> 00:02:21,673 (Gasps) 35 00:02:21,675 --> 00:02:22,774 You wouldn't dare. 36 00:02:22,776 --> 00:02:24,376 Aah! Aah! 37 00:02:24,378 --> 00:02:27,880 That is a thousand-year-old heirloom 38 00:02:27,882 --> 00:02:30,382 from the ling dynasty! 39 00:02:30,384 --> 00:02:33,318 Well, maybe if game geek over there would have helped. 40 00:02:36,089 --> 00:02:38,157 Oh... 41 00:02:41,194 --> 00:02:42,661 Chow. 42 00:02:49,469 --> 00:02:51,470 Shendu: Ah, yes. 43 00:02:51,472 --> 00:02:55,474 Directions to the door which contains tchangzu, 44 00:02:55,476 --> 00:02:58,143 the thunder demon. 45 00:02:58,145 --> 00:03:01,580 Hey, Cali-for-ni-yay. 46 00:03:01,582 --> 00:03:02,981 We are here-- 47 00:03:02,983 --> 00:03:04,750 and we are to go south, 48 00:03:04,752 --> 00:03:05,817 to-- 49 00:03:09,923 --> 00:03:12,024 you got that, didn't you? 50 00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:13,192 Uh... 51 00:03:13,194 --> 00:03:14,626 Pretty much all of it, 52 00:03:14,628 --> 00:03:16,995 before we, uh, ran out of tape. 53 00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:18,330 (Growls) 54 00:03:18,332 --> 00:03:19,765 Dude, run. 55 00:03:19,767 --> 00:03:20,966 (Shendu growls) 56 00:03:20,968 --> 00:03:22,601 Aah! 57 00:03:25,738 --> 00:03:27,039 (Gasps) 58 00:03:27,041 --> 00:03:28,106 Water! 59 00:03:29,242 --> 00:03:30,509 That's right, big v-- 60 00:03:30,511 --> 00:03:33,212 swimmin' pools and movie stars. 61 00:03:33,214 --> 00:03:35,214 We're headin' for... 62 00:03:35,216 --> 00:03:36,348 Jackie: Hollywood? 63 00:03:36,350 --> 00:03:38,150 I'm on my way, captain black. 64 00:03:38,152 --> 00:03:40,552 Jackie, can I come with, please? 65 00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:42,621 Jade, the dark hand is there, 66 00:03:42,623 --> 00:03:44,890 no doubt searching for a demon portal. 67 00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:48,026 But rafaello dicapezio is getting his footprints in cement 68 00:03:48,028 --> 00:03:49,661 at the Chinese theater this weekend. 69 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:51,230 Who-faello di-who-zio? 70 00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:52,664 Hello? 71 00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:54,600 Rafaello dicapezio is only 72 00:03:54,602 --> 00:03:56,902 the greatest movie star in the history of... 73 00:03:56,904 --> 00:03:58,136 History. 74 00:03:58,138 --> 00:03:59,371 Uncle: Ahh... 75 00:03:59,373 --> 00:04:02,441 I guess you have never heard of John Wayne. 76 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,410 Ahh, the Duke. 77 00:04:05,412 --> 00:04:07,813 (Imitating John Wayne) Saddle up, pilgrim. 78 00:04:09,349 --> 00:04:12,084 Hmm, I suppose this is one time 79 00:04:12,086 --> 00:04:14,886 you could come along and not be in the way. 80 00:04:14,888 --> 00:04:16,455 Yes! 81 00:04:16,457 --> 00:04:18,624 Hey, what's that supposed to mean? 82 00:04:19,892 --> 00:04:21,660 Jackie: Tohru will be your chaperone, 83 00:04:21,662 --> 00:04:23,562 while I search for the dark hand. 84 00:04:23,564 --> 00:04:25,964 Well, the festivities aren't till tonight, 85 00:04:25,966 --> 00:04:27,266 so why don't we just take a minute 86 00:04:27,268 --> 00:04:28,900 and help you find the demon door? 87 00:04:31,404 --> 00:04:32,938 Happy sightseeing. 88 00:04:36,308 --> 00:04:39,378 I am so sorry that I screamed, Jade. 89 00:04:39,380 --> 00:04:41,079 Yeah, uh, 90 00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:43,749 Frankenstein did look pretty lifelike, t. 91 00:04:43,751 --> 00:04:45,284 Must be all that wax. 92 00:04:45,286 --> 00:04:49,187 Uh, maybe we should bring back a souvenir for uncle. 93 00:04:49,189 --> 00:04:52,524 Do you have any photos of John Wayne? 94 00:05:01,401 --> 00:05:02,467 Tohru. 95 00:05:11,209 --> 00:05:13,612 Aw, we're wanderin', anyway. 96 00:05:13,614 --> 00:05:16,114 I want to see Clark gable's old house. 97 00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:18,149 Frankly, ratso, I don't give a darn. 98 00:05:18,152 --> 00:05:19,318 And who's wanderin'? 99 00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:21,119 We got directions right here. 100 00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:24,523 Chow: Yeah. Halfway between "the pools of despair" 101 00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:26,124 and "the trail of treachery." 102 00:05:26,126 --> 00:05:27,893 It's all so clear. 103 00:05:29,262 --> 00:05:30,929 (Cell phone rings) 104 00:05:30,931 --> 00:05:32,064 Hello? 105 00:05:32,066 --> 00:05:33,165 Jackie, the dark hand guys 106 00:05:33,167 --> 00:05:35,100 are right outside the wax museum. 107 00:05:35,102 --> 00:05:38,036 Uh, Jade, how do you do that? 108 00:05:38,038 --> 00:05:39,170 Never mind. 109 00:05:39,173 --> 00:05:41,306 Do nothing until I get there. 110 00:05:41,308 --> 00:05:42,374 Can't hear you. 111 00:05:42,376 --> 00:05:43,709 (Imitating static) 112 00:05:43,711 --> 00:05:45,410 You're breaking... 113 00:05:45,412 --> 00:05:46,611 Up. 114 00:05:46,613 --> 00:05:49,114 Jade? Oh! 115 00:05:49,116 --> 00:05:51,016 The wax museum--quickly! 116 00:05:51,018 --> 00:05:54,219 Which do you think uncle would like best? 117 00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:55,620 Jade? 118 00:05:56,556 --> 00:05:58,590 Jade: Look, the 3 stooges! 119 00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:00,125 Where? Duh. 120 00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:01,460 All: Hey! 121 00:06:12,739 --> 00:06:13,972 Heh. 122 00:06:13,974 --> 00:06:15,440 You must want this, huh? 123 00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:22,080 Say "cheese," Princess. 124 00:06:22,082 --> 00:06:24,316 "Cheese, Princess." 125 00:06:26,085 --> 00:06:27,486 Tohru! 126 00:06:29,222 --> 00:06:32,624 Maybe he'd like to see some real stars. 127 00:06:41,601 --> 00:06:42,734 Finn: Chan! 128 00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:45,537 Does this qualify as being outnumbered? 129 00:06:45,539 --> 00:06:46,671 Works for me. 130 00:06:48,541 --> 00:06:50,609 Jade, are you all right? 131 00:06:50,611 --> 00:06:52,210 Peachy. Jackie, I got-- 132 00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:54,946 what part of "do nothing" didn't you understand? 133 00:06:54,948 --> 00:06:57,816 But Jackie, I got-- watch her. 134 00:06:57,818 --> 00:06:58,884 (Moans) 135 00:07:07,727 --> 00:07:08,894 (Gasps) 136 00:07:08,896 --> 00:07:11,296 I have waited for this moment. 137 00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:13,899 Prepare to meet your doom. 138 00:07:22,308 --> 00:07:24,676 I didn't know the dark hand had a new enforcer. 139 00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:27,913 Hyah! 140 00:07:27,915 --> 00:07:29,581 (Grunting) 141 00:07:33,519 --> 00:07:34,719 Aah! 142 00:07:34,721 --> 00:07:36,788 (Both grunting) 143 00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,040 Wires? 144 00:07:56,809 --> 00:07:58,477 Nigel: Cut! 145 00:07:59,779 --> 00:08:01,580 Who are you? 146 00:08:01,582 --> 00:08:02,881 This is a movie set? 147 00:08:02,883 --> 00:08:05,450 Awesome. Are you gonna put Jackie in your movie? 148 00:08:05,452 --> 00:08:08,019 Oh, sure, after I have him arrested! 149 00:08:08,021 --> 00:08:10,255 Nigel, Nigel, calm down. 150 00:08:10,257 --> 00:08:12,524 Larry Franklin, producer of ninjas in the hood. 151 00:08:12,526 --> 00:08:14,559 That was quite a display the way you-- 152 00:08:14,561 --> 00:08:15,660 "bam" and "bam, bam!" 153 00:08:15,662 --> 00:08:16,728 (Laughs) 154 00:08:16,730 --> 00:08:18,730 - You have an agent? - Uh... 155 00:08:18,732 --> 00:08:20,432 That would be moi. 156 00:08:20,434 --> 00:08:23,134 Bam, bam. This town's gettin' younger every day. 157 00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:24,769 Look, lar, 158 00:08:24,771 --> 00:08:27,739 Jackie chan here is going to be the next big action superstar, 159 00:08:27,741 --> 00:08:29,975 and you have the opportunity 160 00:08:29,977 --> 00:08:31,576 to get in on the ground floor. 161 00:08:31,578 --> 00:08:33,578 Jade. 162 00:08:33,580 --> 00:08:35,514 Right, Jackie. Did I mention that he does all his own stunts? 163 00:08:35,516 --> 00:08:36,648 Oh! 164 00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:39,084 Give me a jingle. If jc can act, bam-- 165 00:08:39,086 --> 00:08:40,352 we're in business. 166 00:08:40,354 --> 00:08:42,454 (Scoffs) Act? Jack--whoa! 167 00:08:42,456 --> 00:08:45,423 Say bye-bye to the nice man, Jade. 168 00:08:45,425 --> 00:08:47,993 Jackie, play your cards right, and you can be a star. 169 00:08:47,995 --> 00:08:49,594 I don't want to be a star. 170 00:08:49,596 --> 00:08:51,496 I want to find the demon portal 171 00:08:51,498 --> 00:08:53,198 before valmont's men do. 172 00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:56,167 Oh, that. It's in the bag. 173 00:08:57,169 --> 00:09:00,105 Jade, how do you do that? 174 00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:05,510 Jackie: If "the pools of despair" are the tar pits... 175 00:09:05,512 --> 00:09:08,513 And "the trail of treachery" is the cahuenga pass... 176 00:09:08,515 --> 00:09:12,284 Halfway should be right here. 177 00:09:12,286 --> 00:09:14,286 "Megagalactic studios?" 178 00:09:14,288 --> 00:09:16,187 Boy, talk about your co-ink-I-dink. 179 00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:17,722 As long as we're gonna be on the lot, 180 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:19,524 why don't we "do lunch" with lar? 181 00:09:19,526 --> 00:09:21,960 Because "we" had a big breakfast. 182 00:09:28,601 --> 00:09:29,868 Pass? 183 00:09:29,870 --> 00:09:31,002 Uh... 184 00:09:31,004 --> 00:09:32,637 Hey, you're talkin' to the star 185 00:09:32,639 --> 00:09:34,272 of beach babewatch here. 186 00:09:37,510 --> 00:09:39,044 Oh, uh, sorry. 187 00:09:39,046 --> 00:09:40,377 Go right ahead. 188 00:09:41,814 --> 00:09:43,782 Oh! The dark hand? 189 00:09:45,484 --> 00:09:46,618 Pass? 190 00:09:46,620 --> 00:09:49,187 Yes, I would like to. 191 00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:50,622 No, can't let you on the lot 192 00:09:50,624 --> 00:09:52,090 without a pass. 193 00:09:53,726 --> 00:09:54,793 (Ring) 194 00:09:55,728 --> 00:09:56,828 Good afternoon. 195 00:09:56,830 --> 00:09:58,730 Jade arts talent agency. 196 00:09:58,732 --> 00:10:00,298 Jade, I-- 197 00:10:00,300 --> 00:10:02,167 I can't get onto the studio lot. 198 00:10:03,703 --> 00:10:04,903 Yes, but-- 199 00:10:04,905 --> 00:10:06,705 yes, b-but-- 200 00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,506 ok, I'll do it. 201 00:10:08,508 --> 00:10:10,075 (Telephone rings) Jade? Hello? 202 00:10:10,077 --> 00:10:12,177 Megagalactic studios. 203 00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:13,311 Hey, sipowicz. 204 00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:14,846 See the human action figure 205 00:10:14,848 --> 00:10:16,414 with the million-dollar smile outside your gate? 206 00:10:16,416 --> 00:10:18,917 He's Jackie chan, the next big thing, 207 00:10:18,919 --> 00:10:21,119 and he has a meeting with the Larry Franklin. 208 00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:22,520 So let me give you lar's number 209 00:10:22,522 --> 00:10:24,856 so you can explain how we're about to sign a deal 210 00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:27,192 with another studio, because you wouldn't let 211 00:10:27,194 --> 00:10:29,561 the man who does his own stunts onto the lot. 212 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:32,697 Uh, your pass? 213 00:10:32,699 --> 00:10:35,200 Uh, sorry about the inconvenience, Mr. chan. 214 00:10:36,068 --> 00:10:37,869 How does she do that? 215 00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,673 You gettin' anything? 216 00:10:41,675 --> 00:10:43,608 It's got to be somewhere around here. 217 00:10:43,610 --> 00:10:45,610 Sorry I can't bring it back! Thank you! 218 00:10:45,612 --> 00:10:46,910 Chan! 219 00:10:46,913 --> 00:10:48,079 Get him! 220 00:11:10,403 --> 00:11:11,469 (Buzz) 221 00:11:12,471 --> 00:11:13,571 Yes? 222 00:11:13,573 --> 00:11:14,639 Oh, put her through. 223 00:11:14,641 --> 00:11:15,740 Jade, what's up? 224 00:11:18,077 --> 00:11:19,711 Lunch? Well, let me check my-- 225 00:11:19,713 --> 00:11:20,779 whoa! 226 00:11:25,751 --> 00:11:27,152 What goes up. 227 00:11:27,154 --> 00:11:28,520 Woodchuck Chucks wood! 228 00:11:28,522 --> 00:11:31,322 Whoa... 229 00:11:31,324 --> 00:11:33,958 Aah! 230 00:11:35,394 --> 00:11:38,229 Bam! He really does do his own stunts. 231 00:11:38,231 --> 00:11:39,764 Uh, of course he does. 232 00:11:39,766 --> 00:11:42,934 So, Larry baby, we're on for tomorrow? 233 00:11:42,936 --> 00:11:44,102 You bet--heh-- 234 00:11:44,104 --> 00:11:45,904 unless your client's in traction. 235 00:11:45,906 --> 00:11:47,639 Jackie has a meeting. 236 00:11:47,641 --> 00:11:50,208 I'm da bomb. Uh-huh, uh-huh. 237 00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:53,745 Um, we're going to be late for the footprint ceremony. 238 00:11:53,747 --> 00:11:55,580 Rafaello, right! 239 00:11:55,582 --> 00:11:57,382 Oh... 240 00:11:57,750 --> 00:12:00,118 Ah, oh. 241 00:12:20,206 --> 00:12:22,006 How come everyone can do that? 242 00:12:22,008 --> 00:12:23,541 Ah! Oh! 243 00:12:26,212 --> 00:12:27,645 Huh? Wha-- 244 00:12:29,081 --> 00:12:30,849 the portal! 245 00:12:57,710 --> 00:12:59,911 Greetings, tchangzu. 246 00:12:59,913 --> 00:13:01,613 What took you so long? 247 00:13:01,615 --> 00:13:03,815 Just the usual interference 248 00:13:03,817 --> 00:13:06,050 from Jackie chan. 249 00:13:06,052 --> 00:13:09,487 Then he will interfere no longer. 250 00:13:11,257 --> 00:13:13,191 (Roars) 251 00:13:32,878 --> 00:13:34,979 As the thunder claps, 252 00:13:34,981 --> 00:13:38,249 so do I applaud your skill, brother. 253 00:13:38,251 --> 00:13:43,521 Shendu, you may call me "master." 254 00:13:44,957 --> 00:13:46,891 Of course... 255 00:13:46,893 --> 00:13:48,526 Master. 256 00:13:48,528 --> 00:13:50,228 Ooh, sss... 257 00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:57,401 Now, take me to my palace. 258 00:14:00,906 --> 00:14:04,409 Oh, rubber is an excellent insulator. 259 00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:09,747 The surroundings may not seem familiar, 260 00:14:09,749 --> 00:14:11,683 but I assure you-- 261 00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:13,551 my palace! 262 00:14:15,754 --> 00:14:18,556 These humans have paved my paradise 263 00:14:18,558 --> 00:14:20,658 and constructed a-- 264 00:14:20,660 --> 00:14:22,327 parking lot. 265 00:14:23,028 --> 00:14:24,796 (Roar) 266 00:14:24,798 --> 00:14:27,465 I will rebuild my palace. 267 00:14:27,467 --> 00:14:29,601 For the time being, shendu, 268 00:14:29,603 --> 00:14:32,837 you shall find a dwelling place which befits me. 269 00:14:32,839 --> 00:14:35,106 Uh, how 'bout that one? 270 00:14:37,476 --> 00:14:39,143 Hmm... 271 00:14:39,145 --> 00:14:40,645 That will do. 272 00:14:45,618 --> 00:14:47,452 Isn't he the dreamiest? 273 00:14:47,454 --> 00:14:49,320 He's all right. 274 00:14:50,456 --> 00:14:52,523 (Crowd murmuring) 275 00:14:54,092 --> 00:14:55,293 Uh-oh. 276 00:14:55,295 --> 00:14:57,996 Away, infidels! 277 00:14:57,998 --> 00:15:00,899 (All murmuring) 278 00:15:00,901 --> 00:15:02,901 Why do they not flee? 279 00:15:02,903 --> 00:15:04,769 They think you are... 280 00:15:04,771 --> 00:15:06,804 Entertainment. 281 00:15:06,806 --> 00:15:09,107 Hmm... 282 00:15:09,109 --> 00:15:10,408 Jade: Who's in charge here? 283 00:15:10,410 --> 00:15:12,310 We specifically asked that crowds be kept 284 00:15:12,312 --> 00:15:14,012 at least 60 feet away. 285 00:15:14,014 --> 00:15:15,513 What are you talkin' about, miss? 286 00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:18,249 How are we supposed to film with all this interference? 287 00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:20,652 Do you know how much that animatronic suit cost? 288 00:15:22,721 --> 00:15:24,289 Film? 289 00:15:24,291 --> 00:15:26,658 They told us it was a footprint ceremony. 290 00:15:26,660 --> 00:15:29,894 Let's go. Crowd control. 291 00:15:29,896 --> 00:15:32,797 Wow, these agents are gettin' younger every day. 292 00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:36,434 Uncle: The immortal who cast the original chi spell 293 00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:39,037 on tchangzu, the thunder demon 294 00:15:39,039 --> 00:15:41,739 was patron deity of actors. 295 00:15:41,741 --> 00:15:44,842 And the portal was located in a movie studio? 296 00:15:44,844 --> 00:15:45,977 Weird. (Cell phone rings) 297 00:15:45,979 --> 00:15:47,178 Hello? 298 00:15:47,180 --> 00:15:48,279 Where are you? 299 00:15:48,281 --> 00:15:49,847 Duh. Chinese theater? 300 00:15:49,849 --> 00:15:51,115 But so's the thunder demon, 301 00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:52,850 and he's packin' serious boltage. 302 00:15:52,852 --> 00:15:53,952 How do you do-- 303 00:15:53,954 --> 00:15:58,121 oh, Jade, do nothing until I get there. 304 00:15:58,124 --> 00:16:00,391 Jade never does nothing. 305 00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:02,159 I know, but I feel I have to say it. 306 00:16:03,762 --> 00:16:05,730 Jade: So raf, here's all you gotta do. 307 00:16:05,732 --> 00:16:07,332 When Jackie chan comes running in-- 308 00:16:07,334 --> 00:16:08,666 Jackie who? 309 00:16:08,668 --> 00:16:09,734 (Sighs) 310 00:16:09,736 --> 00:16:11,469 Will you sign my arm? 311 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,505 I'm callin' my manager. 312 00:16:14,507 --> 00:16:16,874 He's not so dreamy anymore. 313 00:16:16,876 --> 00:16:19,677 Relax, t. Raf'll come crawling back 314 00:16:19,679 --> 00:16:22,380 once he reads about this in tomorrow's papers. 315 00:16:22,382 --> 00:16:23,781 Lar? Jade. 316 00:16:23,783 --> 00:16:25,516 If you want to catch Jackie in action, 317 00:16:25,518 --> 00:16:27,585 come to the Chinese theater pronto. 318 00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:32,056 Where is the demon? 319 00:16:32,058 --> 00:16:33,124 Inside. 320 00:16:33,126 --> 00:16:34,592 Uncle, the chi spell's ready? 321 00:16:34,594 --> 00:16:35,927 I cannot prepare the spell. 322 00:16:35,929 --> 00:16:37,762 What?! Need ingredients. 323 00:16:37,764 --> 00:16:39,697 Why don't you have ingredients? 324 00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:42,133 How am I supposed to gather chi ingredients 325 00:16:42,135 --> 00:16:44,302 when you steal my apprentice? 326 00:16:44,304 --> 00:16:46,738 "Chaperone." Pahh. 327 00:16:46,740 --> 00:16:48,406 Oh. 328 00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:49,974 Chinatown. Hurry. 329 00:16:49,976 --> 00:16:52,343 I'll try to keep tchangzu inside. 330 00:16:57,383 --> 00:16:59,117 Jackie! What? 331 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:03,521 Please, Jade, stay here. 332 00:17:07,292 --> 00:17:08,793 Uncle: One more thing. 333 00:17:08,795 --> 00:17:11,462 Powder of komodo dragon tooth. 334 00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:13,231 One more thing. 335 00:17:13,233 --> 00:17:16,434 Tincture of tortoise shell. 336 00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:18,403 One more thing. 337 00:17:18,405 --> 00:17:21,839 Castanets, the symbol of tsao kuo-ch'iu. 338 00:17:21,841 --> 00:17:23,474 (Crash) 339 00:17:23,476 --> 00:17:25,443 In Chinatown? 340 00:17:28,313 --> 00:17:31,215 Tchangzu: I will scorch this city to the ground 341 00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:34,285 while the sound of thunder resonates! 342 00:17:34,287 --> 00:17:36,921 Heh. Guy's a regular Olivier. 343 00:17:39,024 --> 00:17:41,759 Welcome to the cheap seats, chan. 344 00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:43,828 You! 345 00:17:43,830 --> 00:17:48,366 I shall prove that lightning can indeed strike twice. 346 00:17:48,767 --> 00:17:50,234 Baah! 347 00:17:50,236 --> 00:17:52,370 Aah! 348 00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:54,272 Oh... 349 00:17:54,274 --> 00:17:56,207 If life gives you lemons... 350 00:17:58,177 --> 00:17:59,977 Lar, glad you could make it. 351 00:17:59,979 --> 00:18:01,112 Show's about to start. 352 00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:02,513 What show? 353 00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:04,449 Aah! 354 00:18:05,818 --> 00:18:07,118 Bam! 355 00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:08,453 Rhymes with chan. 356 00:18:12,191 --> 00:18:14,058 State of the art. 357 00:18:14,060 --> 00:18:15,593 You guys go all out. 358 00:18:16,795 --> 00:18:17,929 Jade: Uncle! 359 00:18:17,931 --> 00:18:19,530 Must prepare chi spell. 360 00:18:19,532 --> 00:18:21,365 Hold these. 361 00:18:21,367 --> 00:18:22,867 Who's the old guy? 362 00:18:22,869 --> 00:18:25,303 Cranky co-star-- occasional comedy relief. 363 00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:32,844 Forget chan! 364 00:18:32,846 --> 00:18:36,347 If that accursed old man completes his chi spell, 365 00:18:36,349 --> 00:18:39,650 you will be cast back into limbo. 366 00:18:39,652 --> 00:18:41,519 That would be our cue. 367 00:18:43,856 --> 00:18:46,124 (Tohru grunts) 368 00:18:46,126 --> 00:18:48,726 (Roars) 369 00:18:48,728 --> 00:18:49,794 Aah! 370 00:18:52,164 --> 00:18:53,531 (Gasps) 371 00:18:53,533 --> 00:18:54,899 Uh, bam? 372 00:18:54,900 --> 00:18:55,967 Oh! 373 00:18:59,037 --> 00:19:01,506 Jade, play castanets, now! 374 00:19:01,508 --> 00:19:04,342 He's also our musical director. 375 00:19:04,344 --> 00:19:05,909 (Uncle chanting) 376 00:19:16,388 --> 00:19:17,722 (Grunts) 377 00:19:17,724 --> 00:19:21,559 No! 378 00:19:29,233 --> 00:19:30,401 Ole! 379 00:19:30,869 --> 00:19:32,937 (Growls) 380 00:19:34,339 --> 00:19:37,275 So, uh, lar, I'm thinking buddy picture? 381 00:19:37,277 --> 00:19:40,211 Chan and dicapezio, dicapezio and chan. 382 00:19:42,581 --> 00:19:44,882 There is no picture, 383 00:19:44,884 --> 00:19:48,719 and Jackie chan will never do lunch in this town again 384 00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:50,488 ever! 385 00:19:52,357 --> 00:19:54,692 Lar didn't say anything about dinner. 386 00:19:54,694 --> 00:19:55,927 Come on, my treat. 387 00:19:55,929 --> 00:19:57,428 We know of - a Mexican restaurant 388 00:19:57,430 --> 00:19:59,230 where uncle found the castanets. 389 00:19:59,232 --> 00:20:00,631 In Chinatown? 390 00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:05,636 Hollywood is a strange and mysterious place. 391 00:20:05,638 --> 00:20:07,405 So we didn't get a movie deal. 392 00:20:07,407 --> 00:20:10,241 Jackie chan has definitely made his mark in Hollywood. 393 00:20:18,584 --> 00:20:19,884 Hey, Jackie, 394 00:20:19,886 --> 00:20:21,919 have you ever met anybody famous? 395 00:20:21,921 --> 00:20:24,188 One year I was doing, uh, Oscar. 396 00:20:24,189 --> 00:20:26,457 I was standing in the green room. 397 00:20:26,459 --> 00:20:28,593 There's so many big stars in the green room. 398 00:20:28,595 --> 00:20:30,161 I see--wow, John Travolta. 399 00:20:30,163 --> 00:20:31,562 Tom Hanks. 400 00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:33,998 Oh, my god-- Sidney poitier. 401 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,367 I don't know what-- what should I say? 402 00:20:36,369 --> 00:20:38,803 Suddenly, - there's a voice-- 403 00:20:38,805 --> 00:20:40,371 "Jackie chan, can I shake your hand? 404 00:20:40,373 --> 00:20:42,974 I turn around-- Robin Williams. 405 00:20:42,976 --> 00:20:45,109 He said, "Jackie, I'm a big fan of yours. 406 00:20:45,111 --> 00:21:17,077 You are great." That makes me proud.