I need 11 copies of each by tomorrow morning...
and before my macchiato goes arctic.
Assistants just don't have the stamina they used to have.
Excuse me, Miss Lake. With all due respect, I'm not an assistant.
I'm a reporter.
Of course you are.
Unfortunately...
Sullivan...
what matters is that I can see Gotham from my new office...
and you... oh, well, you, hon, you work below sea level.
At the risk of heresy, I would rather be snorkeling for the rest of my life...
than destroy a man's career based on rumor.
I only print the truth. And if you haven't noticed...
I print it on page one, section B, every week.
Ron, I know for a fact that this guy's on steroids. He's a juicer.
I can smell the slow-roasting ink of tomorrow's headline.
Well, you said you wanted someone with their finger on the pulse...
of the city. Well, I just hit an artery.
Well, if it isn't the steroid stallion.
What? Don't you have some muscle-cocktail mixing to do?
You ruined my life.
And you don't even care, do you?
Oh, please, if you didn't wanna get Red Rovered by the Meteors...
maybe you should've reconsidered jamming that needle into your tush.
You're pretty quick to get high and mighty.
I think those aminos are going to your head.
And I think you've destroyed enough lives.
I'm not gonna let you destroy any more.
"Hydro."
So I'm guessing you didn't ditch prime time on your social calendar...
to come and help me research the dwindling pigeon population.
Chloe, Lex proposed.
And?
And I haven't given him an answer yet.
I'm sure that's going over well.
Yeah, Lex and I are in a really great place right now...
but when I actually heard those words...
there was something that wouldn't let me say yes.
Something like Clark?
When I was with Clark...
I would've said yes without hesitating.
I thought that chapter of my life was over.
Lana...
I think that you need to stop reading between the lines...
and actually talk to Clark.
Before you're gonna be able to close this book on him forever.
Let's go.
- Scoopgirl? - Hotshot485?
You've gotta be kidding me.
I'm not the one up all night tooling the Internet for Green Arrow pics.
Don't you have a boyfriend?
Do you have the photos?
You got the cash?
I don't get it. Of all the photographers in Metropolis...
how is that you end up with the first shots of our merry archer?
I have my connections.
No, really.
Oh, well, the guy doesn't get out of the Suicide Slums much.
So I just hung out there for a few weeks.
In my car, with my pepper spray, and the doors locked...
This is it? A bunch of arms and legs?
Nice work, hotshot.
I mean, you didn't even manage to catch one shot of his face.
All these tell me about Green Arrow is that he needs a Band-Aid.
Well, at least you got a good look at that.
Thanks.
Hey, Chloe.
Have you seen the Daily Planet this morning?
No.
Okay.
God, I can't let you read this in the paper.
Lex proposed to Lana.
What'd she say?
She hasn't given him an answer.
It says here it's because of me.
This is true?
Chloe?
I know better...
Look, I know better.
You know, I tried so hard to let Lana go that...
If she marries Lex, there's no going back.
Is it true?
I would double down on the fact that Lana's still in love with you.
- I can't let her do this. - Clark, wait a minute.
It's a lot more complicated now.
What could be more complicated than living your life with regrets?
You didn't have to do that.
I was feeling alone waiting for your answer.
I didn't realize I had so much company.
I don't know what to say.
Then let me.
"When I was with Clark...
I would have said yes without hesitating."
You know, the worst part of waiting...
was dwelling on all the reasons why you might be stalling.
At least now I know.
Lex, I'm sorry.
Mr. Luthor, you have a guest.
- They said Lana was here. - She was.
But I'm afraid you just missed her.
I'll come back later.
So you really think you can convince her?
You think you can talk her out of making...
the biggest mistake of her life by marrying me?
- We both know that you swept in after... - After you crushed her?
You knew she was vulnerable.
And you played her until she thought she was in love with you.
If you really see Lana as that naive...
you obviously don't think as much of her as I do.
It must be eating at you that she's hesitating...
wondering why she hasn't given you an answer.
I guess it would.
If I didn't know what the answer was gonna be.
You see, I highly doubt she'll say no, Clark.
Now that she's carrying my child.
So you're telling me...
you think that Metropolis' most worshipped meathead was murdered?
Hey, now, that's my childhood hero you're talking smack about.
And the one baseball card I still can't manage to snag.
Still?
Yeah, it's an investment.
So why the homicide hunch on this guy?
The obit writer left me Dawson's file to scan his photo.
Preliminary investigation's calling it suicide but...
how's a guy who's larger than life drown in two feet of water?
Well, his career was over...
and Lake was right, the coroner's report says...
Dawson was juiced up on muscle mixers.
Chloe, come on. You're gonna tell me that someone on roid rage...
is gonna lie down in a koi pond and call it a day?
You said you'd have it ready by today.
Well, that was before you added the Zen waterfall.
I have to get approval.
Approval? Oh, please. This pulp rag lives or dies by my column.
Now, you get it done by today...
or you're gonna be decorating bathrooms in strip malls.
Get out!
Mr. Luthor...
now, there's only one reason a celebrity pays me a house call.
Right to the point.
Since you have a unique way of exhuming...
even the most carefully buried secrets...
I have a little freelance assignment for you.
I quit doing freelance when I quit fetching lattes...
for pudgy-fingered newsroom vultures.
Well, I'll let you decide what it's worth to you.
Fill in whatever number you want.
Just get me anything you can on Clark Kent and Lana Lang.
Okay, how long do I have to do this for?
What was it you said?
"Yoga's glorified stretching with chants."
A different perspective from down here.
Yeah, well, this is a good way to strengthen your core, trust me.
I didn't realize that my core was in question.
You really wanna keep talking?
No.
Oh, it's a scratch. Don't worry about it.
A scratch?
How did that happen?
- It was a fencing accident. - With a real blade?
You know, the tip snapped off and caught me.
Trust me, it looks worse than it feels, okay?
I promise.
Thank you for all of the chakra reorganizing, but I have to go.
Well...
Goodbye.
Smallville. Sorry about the article.
It's bad enough to have a broken heart...
but to have it splashed all over the newspapers.
I guess that's what reporters do, don't they?
Okay, I think that little zinger just ricocheted off Linda Lake and hit me.
Look, I'm sorry.
It's just people keep secrets for a reason.
I don't know.
If you ask me, I think a secret is just a big loophole...
in the whole "Thou shall not lie" clause.
There's just no gray area with you, is there?
Not when someone I thought I knew better than anyone...
has been keeping the biggest secret of all.
What are you talking about?
What would you do if one day you realized someone close to you...
had a serious hero complex?
Hero complex?
Hiding his true identity from everyone he supposedly cares about.
You can't tell me you wouldn't find something wrong with that.
Who exactly are we talking about?
Green Arrow, a.k.a. Oliver Queen.
Oliver.
Jimmy snapped photos of Green Arrow...
getting slashed in the arm exactly where ollie's arm is cut.
Plus, the time printed on the photos...
is exactly the same time ollie disappeared on me that same night.
When are you planning to unload this theory on oliver?
I need proof first. Definitive proof.
That's where I thought you might come in handy.
I swear I'm losing my scare reflex because of you.
- Lois asked me... - oh, please, Clark.
Are you gonna tell me why you're digging in Lois' purse, Snoop Dogg?
Wait, let me guess. You're covering for the new pledge of your hero fraternity.
Last time Lois said she had a lead on Green Arrow, she was bluffing.
She says Jimmy has shots that'd help ID him.
Jimmy? He's moonlighting for Lois?
I guess we all have secrets to keep.
You should know that better than anyone right now.
You knew that Lana was pregnant, didn't you?
Clark.
Before you unload your anger on me...
can I just say that I think it is incredibly unfair...
that everyone trusts me to keep their secrets...
then they turn around and they throw me attitude...
for keeping someone else's secret.
Look, I'm sorry that I had to take a two-second breather...
from hiding the fact that you're an alien from another planet...
to protect someone else for a change.
God.
You had that coming, you know.
For the record...
I prefer "intergalactic traveler" over "alien from another planet."
Hey.
Thanks for finally returning one of my phone calls.
How much does Lana Lang's personal life...
boost newspaper sales these days?
Okay. I was expecting that.
But to be honest, I was kind of hoping you'd give me the benefit of the doubt.
I guess there's a shortage of those today.
That article recites our conversation verbatim.
Do you honestly think I'd betray you like that?
What other explanation is there?
I'm not sure, but the Lana Lang I know...
would at least give me a chance to find one.
After Clark, I guess I'm so jaded...
I don't even know what to expect from my friends anymore.
So I take it the conversation didn't go so well.
Conversation?
- Clark left the Talon to go talk to you. - About what?
Well...
I don't...
I should just put a bag over my head that says:
"If you wanna keep a secret, don't tell me."
What did he wanna say?
You two need to O.K. Corral it on your own.
I've been blamed for putting words in people's mouths enough for one day.
I'm sorry I didn't trust you.
I don't understand how every intimate detail of my life...
is being leaked into Linda Lake's column.
From what I found out, her reconnaissance techniques...
aren't exactly from the Journalist Code of Ethics.
I think it's time we turn the tables on our little resident voyeur.
Hey, I got your call. What's the 911?
I've been thinking.
Maybe your oliver theory isn't so far out there.
If he is the Green Arrow, you deserve to know the truth.
Really? Because I've been doing some thinking of my own...
and maybe I don't wanna know.
I went through the articles on Green Arrow's crimes.
What if we just got off on the wrong foot?
The rob-from-the-rich- to-give-to-the-poor thing...
that wins him some points. - Are you feeling okay?
No, I'm not all right, Clark. I think I'm in love with oliver.
I don't know how you ever let Lana go if you felt this way...
because I swear the guy could tell me he was from Mars right now...
and I would find a way to dismiss it as an endearing quirk.
Lois, you're like a pit bull on a pant leg.
You're never gonna let this go until you know for sure.
I hate that you know me like that.
But I can't just pull a Lois and ambush him. What if I'm wrong?
What if you never need to confront him?
Isn't this exciting? Our first group movie night?
I mean, don't you just love spontaneity?
Let me get it. Clark. Come on in.
Let me get your jacket.
Thanks for having me over.
Lois, looks like you went all out.
Well, it's not a party until...
oh, no. I can't believe I did that.
You can't have cocktails without ice.
Don't worry, yours will be virgin.
You know what, I'll run to the corner, I can...
No. No, I got it. My party, my bad.
You think she suspects anything?
- She's a little preoccupied. - Then it's showtime.
Oliver... they're chasing me.
I don't know how many there are, 10 maybe.
I shouldn't have cut down the alley.
Oh, my God, oliver. Help me.
Good one, Lois.
Need some help?
You didn't tell me there was gonna be real thugs.
They kind of made an impromptu appearance.
Let her go.
Let's go! Come on, come on!
Your secret's safe with me, oliver.
- You're... - A hell of a thank you.
Did you just call him oliver?
It was just a hunch.
All right, Lana, you ready for your close-up?
I can't believe this is so easy.
Okay. How are my pearly megapixels looking?
Crystal clear. Since we're eavesdropping...
can you find out what else she has on Lex and me?
Yeah, sure. Do a little recon while we're at it.
Chloe, what is it?
Clark...
Like tomorrow's headline?
And here I thought your hatred was just professional jealousy.
Who knew you were covering such a scandalous secret?
You're actually gonna stake your reputation...
on this tabloid garbage that's not even fit for the Inquisitor?
Nobody's gonna believe you.
Oh, of course they will. I have a very trustworthy source.
You.
And, no doubt, if anyone goes looking for proof...
well, I think they're gonna find it.
But I must say, I am impressed. Here you were, sitting on a story...
that could have earned you a major headline.
You chose to protect your friend instead.
Not a hard decision to make when you actually care about someone.
It's values like that that keep your career in the basement.
Don't you just love the Internet?
Did you know, with just one touch of a button...
I can be on every major talk show?
And everyone at You Tube will know that your farm-boy friend...
is really an...
- alien.
Your credibility might be at stake...
when you're locked up for Dawson's murder.
Mike Dawson drowned. Do your homework.
It's in every police report.
Most police aren't from Smallville. You remember Smallville, don't you?
You were a rookie reporter for KSCW...
who went for the second meteor shower.
Moth got too close to the flame...
and your news van took a nosedive into Crater Lake.
My guess is you walked out with some sort of special ability.
From what I found out, Mike Dawson wasn't your first victim, was he?
Nobody likes an overachiever.
Hey, Sullivan.
You wanna rise above sea level, you better sharpen those teeth.
- Oh, my God, she came out of nowhere. - It's okay. She's gone now.
Yes.
Hey, how are the secret adventures of Lois and Jimmy?
Busted.
Oh, my God, what happened to your face?
You should see the other guy.
Who did that to you?
You can put your dueling pistol away. It was just a workplace scuffle.
You were right about Lake.
Looks like we're two-for-two tonight.
I wanted you to be the first one to take a look at this.
Check it out.
Green Arrow. I got real pictures of him.
Face and all.
And this one's not yet rated.
I feel dirty.
Think about how oliver feels.
Lois and Clark put this scheme together...
because they thought oliver was Green Arrow.
Poor sucker comes around the corner...
catches her sucking lip with leather daddy.
This, this is the real money shot.
Get ready to meet the Green Arrow.
No. No, no, this is not happening.
I had his face in the crosshairs. How could he be there...
and then just gone like the '90s?
Gone as in "faster than a thousandth of a second" shutter speed?
Yeah. Weird.
I always thought he was super-cool. I didn't realize he was superhuman.
- Clark. - What's going on?
Lois was just telling me about her exciting night last night.
Yeah, I don't know where you disappeared to last night, Smallville.
Turns out I was wrong about oliver.
He's not the Green Arrow, can you believe that?
And luckily oliver showed up when our hero was still around...
but looks like you were way off base about him.
And the craziest part is he chucked a guy across an alley, right?
- Oh, yeah. - And then super-sped away.
I mean, who does that?
It's good oliver showed up when he did, then you knew for sure.
Oh, she knew before he showed up.
You did?
Ask her how.
How?
I kissed him.
Isn't that romantic?
Oh, I'm sorry, Lois. Finish the story.
This is the best part.
Well, he was holding me in his arms...
and ollie's a good kisser, don't get me wrong.
But that Green Arrow...
he could teach ollie a thing or two.
Hey.
You took off early last night. You okay?
I just keep running what happened through my head.
Lana, you can't blame yourself. It wasn't your fault.
That part I'm pretty clear on.
Look, nobody wanted to see her die...
but if you hadn't come when you did...
it would've been my obit on the front page.
Maybe.
Of section D.
Anyway, thank you. Again.
How do you do that?
Just brush it under the rug as if nothing happened?
Lana, Linda wasn't the first freak of nature who went psycho.
No.
I mean, whatever it is you're protecting about Clark.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Yes, you do.
Some secret about a farm boy?
Made you take a hammer to her computer before I could hear the rest.
Come on, Chloe, I'm not that naive.
Whatever it is you two have been hiding...
do you really expect me to keep looking the other way?
Linda was grasping at straws.
She's always desperate for her next story...
you know that better than anyone.
Lana.
I would never do anything to hurt you.
That's what Clark always says.
I'm sorry that you had to find out like this.
It's okay.
You don't have to tell me every little detail of your life anymore.
Clark, we both know that a proposal is more than a little...
detail.
And as messed up as it is...
you were the first person that I wanted to tell.
Is that supposed to make me feel better?
Clark, you said that you didn't love me anymore.
And I tried to cut everything off, but I'm not made that way.
Even if we're not talking...
you are still a part of my life.
And I'm not trying to deny it anymore.
I am trying to put it into perspective.
I guess we both need to do that.
Chloe said that you came by to talk to me.
What was it about?
Whatever secret Chloe is helping you to protect, Clark...
please...
just once...
Just trust me.
Doesn't matter now.
Clark, don't do that.
I know about the baby.
Lex told me.
Everything's changed.
Even the fact that you told me...
that you look back at the past and regret it every day?
Has that changed too?
I guess that I can't ask you to see me the same way.
Lana.
I hope Lex makes you very happy.
A million dollars for your thoughts.
Sorry.
My comic timing is the first to go after my nerves.
You know, in all my life...
I've never made an offer when I was afraid of the answer...
till now.
You have been so patient.
Doesn't feel like it.
I went to see Clark.
And?
And I love him.
I love both of you and maybe I always will.
Lex, I couldn't say yes to you, knowing that I might look back with regrets.
You deserve better than that.
Lana, with the life I've led...
I go to bed praying every night that I don't get what I deserve.
You get bitter...
and vengeful.
And then you meet someone...
who's so good...
that she might be the one person who could learn to love you.
I would wait forever for that.
You don't have to.
I'm done looking back.
I have someone right in front of me...
who I know trusts me...
and who lets me see sides of him no one else does.
So just for clarification...
Yes, Lex Luthor.
I will marry you.