For once I believe you because it's just rotten enough.
We're both rotten.
You're a little more rotten. You got me to take care of your husband.
Then you'd get Zachetti to take care of Lola, maybe me too.
Then somebody would come along to take care of Zachetti.
That's how you operate.
Suppose it is? Is what you've got cooked up for tonight any better?
I don't like that music anymore.
Mind if I close the window?
You can do better than that, can't you, baby?
Better try it again.
Maybe if I came a little closer.
How's this? Think you can do it now?
Why didn't you shoot again, baby?
Don't tell me it's because you've been in love with me all this time.
No, I never loved you, Walter, or anybody else.
I'm rotten. I used you just as you said.
That's all you ever meant to me...
...until a minute ago...
-What the fuck are you doing? -...when I couldn't fire that second shot.
You know what time it is?
Listen up.
At 2200, Wetsuit's down the hole when the snake hits the carpet.
Security lifts the key.
l terminate the torpedoes.
Charm the snake into the stall.
Bait and switch.
At 2220, Wetsuit turns out the lights.
Glasses on. l bag the snake.
Key in the bag. Bag to the boat.
No radio unless absolutely necessary.
Code red, five minutes to blackout.
Drop everything. Walk away.
lf the cops catch you, tell them the truth.
You know no one.
Got it?
You have your passport?
The plane leaves tomorrow at 0700.
And remember, no names and no guns.
Are you high?
Then stop dreaming, bitch.
This isn't a game tonight. People can die.
Now get moving.
You forget something?
Good evening. Thank you very much. Oh, it's a picture of you?
-Let's go. -l got to go to the bathroom.
-You know how it is for girls. -You come back? One minute.
With an ass like that, l don't think you need makeup.
Mademoiselle Veronica?
Okay, baby. Baby, wake up.
-We gotta go. -No.
Time to go.
Mademoiselle Veronica?
The key's in the bag.
Get moving!
Move!
You better get out of here. Go!
Asshole! You said, no fucking guns!
Where's my passport?
You better kill me now, bitch.
Shut the fuck up!
Understand? Dead!
No, you don't understand. l need a passport yesterday.
Did you get it?
Yeah. Here.
Wait!
Did you hear that? What is that?
What the fuck are you doing?
Excuse me, madame, but l believe this is a free country.
l'm entitled to make any picture of anything l want from my balcony.
Go fuck yourself!
Go to church. Try to save your soul. Got you!
Yes!
Lily!
Hotel Sheraton.
Maybe l should hire you.
l got you, fucking bitch! Come on!
Before l snap your double-crossing neck!
Just tell me one thing.
Where are the diamonds?
Payback time, bitch!
Holy shit!
Oh, my God!
Yep.
l'm sorry. l'm sorry.
You were sleeping.
Are you okay?
l didn't mean to frighten you, l'm sorry. Are you okay?
l'm sorry.
Yes.
California.
l mean, l grew up in California, but l live in Washington now.
And what do you do, in life?
ln life?
Well, l started in software, ordinateur...
...and made some money...
...then found out that l was interested in other things.
Like what things?
Like the whole world. l went back to school in Washington.
Got a degree in foreign relations, taught for a little while.
Then got a posting at the State Department.
America is a country very big, no?
Very big. ls this your first trip?
Yes. l begin my new life there.
France is no good for me.
How can you say that? France is a fabulous country.
Really. lt's the queen of Europe to me.
The art, the history...
...the sense of language, Stendhal, Racine, Balzac--
l lost my baby there.
l'm sorry, l don't know what to say. That's terrible.
Please forgive me. l didn't know.
lt's okay. lt's okay.
That is just awful.
What, are you dodging bill collectors?
-Nick, it's Johnny. -l know.
-What are you doing? -Working.
-Something I could sell? -Could be. Just need one more piece.
Another shot of that table? Are you eating?
Barely.
Like to take a break from your masterwork and make some money?
-What are you selling? -You know who Bruce Hewitt Watts is?
Strange as it may seem to you, photographers actually read.
-Books, magazines, even newspapers. -All right, smart-ass. Who is he?
-New American ambassador? -Bingo.
He's got a wife, but no one seems to have a picture of her.
-Maybe she's camera-shy. -No. She's got a past...
...and she's not talking. I did some checking. She's French.
Married before, with a kid.
l got an ex l don't talk about. What's wrong with that?
Nothing, except you don't dodge photographers like you're hiding.
-So you want me to nail her, right? -You are the best.
Come on, you know l don't like to do this.
-l feel like shit and besides, l am retired. -On what, IOUs?
I'm not just your agent. I'm your bank, and you're way past due.
Do yourself a favor and go to work. I get five figures for this picture.
All right. What's her schedule?
She arrives by private jet tonight.
-l gotta go. Bye. -Take that picture.
Shit!
-ls this Nicolas Bardo? -Speaking.
You took a picture of Mrs. Watts?
Who wants to know?
Leonard Shiff, head of Watts' security.
l'd like to buy it.
Well, l'm sorry, Mr. Shiff, but it's already been sold.
Unsell it. We'll double whatever you got.
That's very generous, but l--
You don't realize who you're dealing with. We know all about you.
Your overdrawn bank account, your criminal record.
l suggest you get that picture back, and you bring it to me...
...at the residence tomorrow morning, 1 1 a.m. sharp.
Don't keep me waiting.
Sir, hold on.
Hello?
Park Bardo in the office until l can get--
Hold on a second.
l don't believe it. This paparazzi scum is wearing a wire.
Make sure it doesn't get past security.
Hold on.
Une minute, pal.
Damn it! Damn it! Oh, shit.
-ls the bar open? -Yes, of course, sir.
But you can't stay there. Please move your bike. Can't leave it there.
-You can't leave it there. -l know, l know.
-Please. -Okay.
Hi. l'm sorry to bother you, but l rented this room last night...
-...and l think l left my disk here. -Disk?
When l got home, l checked my laptop, and the backup disk was gone.
lt's the only copy l have. l searched like hell for it.
Then l remember, the only place l could've left it was here.
-Do you mind if l take a look? -l don't think it's a good idea--
Thank you very much. Thank you. l appreciate it.
Thank you.
Oh, my God, l got so much information on that disk.
You didn't see a disk, right? Actually, it's not a disk.
lt's not like a CD or DVD or anything like that. lt's called floppy.
lt's like a black thing you introduce in the computer.
l am remembering now that l put it there.
Because l was working in bed. l love, l just love to work in bed.
l bet you do too.
Anyway, let me just remember exactly what l did.
l just-- l sat over here. Oh, my--
l sat over here, put it on my lap because it's a laptop and plug it over there.
You know what happened? lt happens that l wasn't alone.
l wasn't alone, and--
Oh, my God!
That's not your business.
Well, no, it's not.
lt's not, but it is.
Because.... Excuse me.
Are you all right?
l think l can help you.
l have been working in a hospital, l'm a candy striper.
Sit down. Give me your arms. Put them up like this:
And relax, relax! And breathe. Breathe and relax.
And now listen to me. Listen to me good.
l know. l've been accused of having an overactive imagination...
...but when a classy woman checks into an airport hotel...
...in the morning with bullets and a gun...
...there's one word that follows.
What word?
Bang!
Now, if a guy walks in, maybe there doesn't have to be a bang.
Maybe there is something to talk about.
Coffee?
Well....
Maybe we should start with some introductions?
l don't care who you are...
...and l don't want you to know who l am.
All right, that's fair enough. Let's call me Harry.
And let's start with the shiner. Who is beating you up?
-Must we talk about this? -Yes.
Or we're gonna go find a local police station, and we'll talk about it there.
-My husband. -All right. Why?
He has...
...difficulty...
...to control his temper.
Why does he lose it?
Because l can't live with him here.
-Why not? -l have a past here.
l was safe in the States, but here, it only takes one photo.
Like the one today.
l took that picture.
So Harry is Nicolas Bardo.
Why did you follow me? To get more photos?
No, no, l....
l came to tell your security goon, Mr. Shiff...
...l couldn't stop the picture from being published. Sorry.
Anyone can see that. You've wasted your time.
This espresso is cold.
-Can l get you another cup? -Why?
There's nothing more to say.
Can l go now? You have the gun.
-Sex shops are open all day. -l don't think l'll be going to one.
How can l be sure?
Just stay with me.
l need air, but l don't want to talk anymore.
Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please.
We advise you not to leave luggage unattended and to beware of pickpocket.
When l got divorced, l decided to come to Paris to reinvent myself.
That kind of thing. l've got these crazy photographer ideas.
Don't think l'm a paparazzi. l hate it.
l feel like shit, but l have to make some money.
But there is a square here in Paris full of coffee shops, beautiful.
This one particular with light reflections...
...and l saw something that changed my life.
-lt's a great story. -This is the best part.
l know, l know. Maybe another time.
lt's a great story.
But right now l'm very tired...
...and l'd like to take a warm bath and relax a little...
...before l go home, okay? Thank you for today.
l'll be waiting out here, just in case you need anything.
-You don't trust me, do you? -No, no, no.
lt's not that. lt's just being careful.
-Are you all right? -No.
l'm out of my medicine.
-There was a pharmacy in the airport. -That's right. My--
My inhaler is in my car. They can refill it for me there.
That wouldn't be being careful. l....
Nicolas, take my car...
...take my purse...
...if you're so worried that l go somewhere.
You can call a taxi. Come on.
Yes, Nicolas. l could call a taxi...
...but l'm not going to do that.
l'm not going to need these in the bath.
Wait, wait. Hold it.
Definitely not going anywhere without them.
Are you flirting with me?
-Was l? -Well....
l believe so. Yeah.
l didn't mean to.
lt's just that...
...all your boyhood stories...
...make you so...
...damn lovable.
Was that the point?
Well, it's not mine, but somebody loaned it to me.
Lay down.
This doesn't make much sense. l'm Chief lnspector Serra.
Maybe you can help me out.
l said it already.
But, okay, all right. Mrs. Watts is trying to kill herself.
l stopped her. So she set me up for you guys, to get me out of the way.
-That's it. -How did you come up with that?
l read a lot of mysteries, and l figure out the endings halfway.
l know what happened.
What happened, Mr. Bardo...
...was a car belonging to Ambassador Watts was found in your possession.
l know that.
On the front seat was a gun, bullets...
...a blouse and dress.
The only thing missing is the woman.
Where is she?
l don't know. l don't know.
-You check out the hotel? -Yeah. We checked the room.
We found a naked waitress in a coma.
Did you have anything to do with that?
No.
No, no. l wasn't there. l was buying an inhaler.
lnhaler?
Yes! An inhaler. An inhaler! All right, Mrs. Watts has asthma.
So l went to a pharmacy to get her prescription refilled. That's it.
So you figured...
...by having her car and clothes, she wasn't going anywhere?
That's correct. Yeah.
And you kept the gun so she wouldn't shoot herself?
That's right.
Why would she want to do that?
-Excuse me? -Why would she want to do that?
Well, her husband was beating her up because she wanted to leave him.
The American ambassador beats his wife?
Yes, that's right.
Yes, and she has the face to prove it.
You see...
...l'm kind of a mystery buff myself.
And you know what kind of mystery this is?
-A kidnapping. -Come on.
Ambassador's wife held for ransom.
Everything was going fine until someone reported a stolen car.
You didn't have time to send the ransom note.
No, no. What are you talking about? No. l am no kidnapper, sir.
Why don't we go to the residence and see what he has to say?
l think this is a terrible misunderstanding.
l spoke with Mrs. Watts. She explained how she let Mr. Bardo use her car.
l don't know who reported it stolen. lt wasn't.
My attorney has indicated to me that no crime has been committed.
So l'm a little confused as to what we're doing here, inspector.
-You spoke to your wife yourself? -Yes, l did.
-Could l speak with her? -l don't think that's necessary.
This has been an awkward situation for all concerned...
...and l really don't want to prolong it.
Mrs. Phillips will handle your questions from now on.
l have an engagement. Please excuse me.
lnspector Serra...
...you've displayed a boorish lack of sensitivity towards the ambassador.
We do not need or want your investigative skills employed...
...to discover why Mrs. Watts was in a hotel bedroom with Mr. Bardo.
l suggest you return to your duties and drop this matter.
The less said about it, the better.
l'd still like to talk to Mrs. Watts.
-And what crime has she committed? -No crime. l just wanna see her.
Well, l'm sure we all want to see lots of people.
But, fortunately, in our country and in yours...
...they are not compelled to see us.
Good day, inspector.
-Sir. -You know the penalty for a handgun?
-l told you, it's not my gun. -Then we'll just keep it.
Now, about your motorcycle. You really want to report it stolen?
lf it wasn't at the hotel, somebody took it.
Why don't you look a little harder?
-lf it doesn't turn up, give me a call. -Sir.
You don't believe one thing l said, right?
Not only don't l believe you, l don't even like you.
Look, Bardo, l know who you are.
Ex-paparazzi smart-ass, who hasn't worked for seven years.
l don't know what you're up to, but it's not smart.
Keep it up and you'll wind up in a cellblock full of smart guys like you.
"Mr. Watts, if you ever want to see your wife again...
...bring 1 0 million dollars in bearer bonds to the Passerelle Debilly...
...at 2 a.m. this morning.
lf you inform the police or arrive with anyone besides yourself...
...she will be killed."
Oh, shit!
Son of a bitch!
Mrs. Watts.
Call me Lily.
Okay, Lily.
What the hell do you think you're doing, Lily?
Are you mad at me?
Mad? No. You are making everybody think l've kidnapped you.
-Haven't you? -That is not funny.
No, Nicolas. You're right, it's not funny.
lt wasn't funny when you sold my picture either.
And then you showed up to do what? Explain? Apologize? Lie?
l was afraid for your life. l felt responsible for it!
That's so sweet, Nicolas.
l'm a bad girl, Nicolas.
Real bad.
Rotten to the heart.
Last scrape l was in, l fucked up a lot of people.
Bad people, people like me. People that don't forget.
But l was given a second chance.
So l went back to the States, where l got everything a bad girl ever wanted.
Fucking Watts.
He was kind of a sweet guy until being the richest man wasn't enough.
He had to have public glory.
He gave away a ton of money, bought the ambassadorship...
...which meant the little missis got dragged out in the Parisian limelight.
Well, l couldn't do that, because bad people read newspapers too.
Et voilą.
Enter my worst nightmare.
You snap that fucking picture, sell it to the tabloids...
...and now it's only a matter of time before those bad people come running.
So l got the photographer turned blackmailer to kidnap me.
Blackmailer? You offered me money!
And l have never kidnapped anybody, you fucking bitch!
Then where am l, Nicolas?
Why did you have my car, my clothes, a gun?
Why was a ransom note e-mailed from your computer?
-Everyone knows you did it. -l've gotta think.
-What? -l've gotta think about--
You don't have to think about anything. l've got it all thought out for you.
Watts is coming up here at 2 a.m. with $ 1 0 million.
Now, if you start being a little nice to me...
...l might cut you in on the take.
-We are going to the police. -Why would you wanna do that?
You're gonna tell them the crazy story you just told me. Come on!
What, do you think l'm stupid? l'm not gonna tell them that story.
l'm gonna tell them the kidnapping story, starring you.
-Son of a bitch! -Nicolas.
Hold on, hold on.
-l went back to that sex shop. -Oh, shit.
Come on.
What did you do with that other gun?
-The cops took it. -They did?
-Yes, they did. -l got you another one. Come here.
-Be careful with that thing. -lt's all right.
Nicolas. lsn't sugar better than vinegar?
Come on.
We have a couple hours, baby. Let's go do something fun, you want to?
Hey, how come you're the only man in this room that doesn't wanna fuck me?
What? Nicolas, where are you going?
l'm just going to buy some cigarettes.
Don't worry, l'm not going anywhere while you have my balls in your pocket!
Pack of cigarettes. Anything American.
Hi.
What's your name?
Hey, Nicolas. Come here.
-Meet my friend Napoleon. -Oh, yeah.
l think he's in love.
Can we just go outside? l need to talk to you.
Come on! We're having fun. Just be cool.
-l'm gonna go outside. -No! Nicolas.
We don't want you to wait out in the cold. Do we, Napoleon?
l mean, if we hit it off--
l thought of letting you off the hook.
-Really? -Yeah.
You don't seem to be enjoying my company much.
Maybe Napoleon and l should sail off into the sunset...
...and you can go fuck yourself.
l hope you didn't kill him.
He was gonna save me from a dip in the Seine.
What?
We had big plans. l was gonna go off the bridge into his boat.
Big plans. Oh, poor Lily, whatever happened to her?
She must have drowned and washed out to sea.
Thanks a lot. You've ruined everything.
Fuck you.
What's the matter, Nicolas?
Don't l make you jealous?
Jealous? Yes. Yes.
l was jealous. l am jealous.
Nicolas, you don't have to lick my ass. Just fuck me.
-You know what? -What?
We can still go away.
Both of us, together.
That's so sweet.
Come here. Come here.
That's so romantic.
But without the money?
Are you nuts?
Yes. That's a choice.
A bad choice.
There are other ones.
What, like doing the right thing?
That's a start.
l tried that once, Nicolas.
And you know what it got me?
A lifetime of looking over my shoulder.
You know why no good deed goes unpunished?
Because this world is hell, and you're nothing but a fucking patsy.
l made everybody think you kidnapped me...
...so l could screw my husband out of 1 0 million bucks.
That's what it's all about.
Me disappearing with 1 0 million bucks.
So wipe it off...
...and let's go get it.
Fuck you!
You're not gonna hurt her, right?
Because l've done exactly what you've told me to do.
l brought the money...
...and l haven't talked to anyone.
-Don't do anything foolish, darling. -l won't.
He just wants me to take the money and bring it back to him.
Okay!
Watts, it's Nicolas Bardo.
Your wife is staging this kidnapping to take your $ 1 0 million.
lf you don't believe me, l got it right here on tape.
What the fuck do you think you're doing?
You killed him.
l was just being careful.
Fucking bitch!
You didn't think l'd give you a gun loaded with real bullets, did you?
Baby...
...there's one more thing we gotta do.
Oh, God! Somebody, help! My husband.
Fucking over everyone again?
But not this time.
Where are the diamonds?
Fuck you!
Wake up, bitch!
Before you die!
You know what's in this?
The bullet that's going to spread your brains all over that wall.
You know how l know? Look at me.
l'm your fucking fairy godmother...
...and l just dreamt your future. And mine too.
And all l know is...
...if there's a chance of any of that shit happening, we're gonna change it here.
Now listen.
l know you got a bad break, but you better forget it.
Because if you can't...
...then you may as well go ahead and pull the trigger.
But if you don't end it here...
...and you get your ass on that plane to America...
...your future will be sitting right next to you.
His name is Bruce, and he's a really good guy. He'll look into your eyes...
...and he's gonna fall in love.
And after that, you're on your own.
So, what do you say?
Do l pull the trigger?
Or do you get your ass on that plane...
...and have a wonderful life?
How do l know that you tell the truth?
How do l know there's a bullet in the chamber?
Are you dodging bill collectors?
Nick, asshole, it's Johnny.
-l know who you are. -What's up?
-Trying to catch lightning in a bottle. -Are you eating?
-Barely. -Like to make some real money?
-What are you selling, John? -You know who Bruce Hewitt Watts is?
-The new American ambassador? -Bingo.
He's got a wife and three kids, but no one has a picture of them.
Maybe they're camera-shy. Some people like to keep their home life private.
l know it's weird, but they do.
Did you find fucking God? You owe me, pal.
l guess l'll have to keep on owing you.
That's your half. A little under 4 million.
Four?
That's the best l could do. l had to fence them off one at a time.
Sorry that it took so long, but it was the safest way.
Not bad for a night's work, huh?
You call that work?
Bye, Laure. lt's best if we don't see each other again.
-Excuse me, lady. Are you all right? -lt was an accident, it was terr--
Sorry.
l'm just a little shook-up.
Actually, you look like you need a drink.
Drink?
Yes, come on.
l'm sorry...
...you look so familiar.
Have we met before somewhere?
Only in my dreams.
[ENGLlSH]