1
00:00:34,950 --> 00:00:37,827
New car, Z?
For your information only...

2
00:00:37,911 --> 00:00:39,913
that's a prototype.

3
00:00:39,997 --> 00:00:42,500
Bother.
Yes. Right.

4
00:00:42,583 --> 00:00:46,921
I'll be back in a sec.
Don't touch a thing.

5
00:00:58,643 --> 00:01:02,105
England captain
Danny "mean machine"meehan...

6
00:01:02,146 --> 00:01:04,984
is licensed to score with Umbro.

7
00:01:11,783 --> 00:01:13,910
Licensed to get hammered, you mean.

8
00:02:01,506 --> 00:02:04,009
Elvis, large whiskey.

9
00:02:04,092 --> 00:02:07,137
Do you want anything in that?
Yeah, a double.

10
00:02:08,973 --> 00:02:10,975
It's lively in here, isn't it?

11
00:02:11,059 --> 00:02:14,855
Didn't you used to be Danny Meehan?
Used to be, mate.

12
00:02:14,939 --> 00:02:16,649
A very long time ago.

13
00:02:16,690 --> 00:02:18,985
Sir, I'm afraid we're gonna
have to Breathalyze you.

14
00:02:19,068 --> 00:02:22,822
No need, Officer.
I'm totally drunk.

15
00:02:22,905 --> 00:02:24,824
Come on, Danny.
No trouble.

16
00:02:26,660 --> 00:02:28,871
Oh, look.
A miniature copper.

17
00:02:31,707 --> 00:02:34,001
I think you'd better come with us.

18
00:02:34,085 --> 00:02:36,796
Don't be silly.
Oh, come on.

19
00:02:36,880 --> 00:02:38,882
You are nicked, sunshine.

20
00:02:41,426 --> 00:02:44,931
BBC News headlines. At London
Crown Court this morning...

21
00:02:45,014 --> 00:02:48,519
ex-England football captain Danny
meehan was jailed for three years...

22
00:02:48,559 --> 00:02:51,562
despite having pleaded guilty
to assaulting two police officers...

23
00:02:51,647 --> 00:02:53,941
and driving drunk whilst banned.

24
00:02:54,024 --> 00:02:57,904
meehan's downfall from the top of world
football celebrity has been swift...

25
00:02:57,946 --> 00:03:00,657
since accusations of match-fixing
ended the career...

26
00:03:00,740 --> 00:03:03,326
of one of this country's
finest players.

27
00:03:03,411 --> 00:03:06,539
The judge showed little sympathy
for meehan's pleas of mitigation...

28
00:03:06,622 --> 00:03:09,001
imposing the maximum sentence.

29
00:03:09,083 --> 00:03:12,254
meehan showed no emotion
as he was led away.

30
00:03:12,336 --> 00:03:14,506
The one-time superstar will
serve his sentence...

31
00:03:14,589 --> 00:03:17,050
at Longmarsh
High-security Prison...

32
00:03:18,428 --> 00:03:20,555
famous for its
rehabilitation program...

33
00:03:22,265 --> 00:03:24,225
reformed characters...
Fill his face in!

34
00:03:24,310 --> 00:03:26,895
and modern conditions.

35
00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:44,457
Open!

36
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:47,919
That's it. Get out!
Come on!

37
00:03:50,380 --> 00:03:53,092
Get away from the van.
Shut it!

38
00:03:53,134 --> 00:03:56,387
This is a category B nick,
not fuckin' Butlins.

39
00:03:56,471 --> 00:03:59,641
Do you understand? You're nothing
in here. Do you hear me?

40
00:03:59,725 --> 00:04:02,811
Nothing!
Move out!

41
00:04:02,894 --> 00:04:05,230
May the good Lord be with you.

42
00:04:06,900 --> 00:04:08,318
He's a pretty boy.

43
00:04:11,738 --> 00:04:13,324
Coming in!

44
00:04:15,159 --> 00:04:17,077
Go on.
Straight down the stairs there.

45
00:04:17,161 --> 00:04:19,747
Prisoner on the move!

46
00:04:19,830 --> 00:04:24,169
Stay behind the line. Stand there.
Valuables?

47
00:04:24,211 --> 00:04:26,797
Prisoner Meehan, 04 112.

48
00:04:29,092 --> 00:04:30,593
Sign it.

49
00:04:36,015 --> 00:04:38,851
Here's your designer gear
for the next three years. Enjoy.

50
00:04:38,936 --> 00:04:42,356
What are you waiting for, eh?
Come on, move it!

51
00:05:13,391 --> 00:05:16,103
He was captain of his country
and he ends up in here, eh?

52
00:05:16,186 --> 00:05:20,775
73 international appearances, and
you sell your country out in a game?

53
00:05:20,858 --> 00:05:23,236
That's unbloodyEnglish, that is.

54
00:05:35,417 --> 00:05:36,876
Chief?

55
00:06:16,965 --> 00:06:19,509
I'm the chief officer
of this prison.

56
00:06:21,136 --> 00:06:23,471
You call me
"Mr. Burton, sir."

57
00:06:25,181 --> 00:06:28,352
You call him Mr. Ratchett
and him Mr. Hayter.

58
00:06:28,436 --> 00:06:32,273
Anybody in this uniform,
you call mister, right?

59
00:06:32,356 --> 00:06:33,899
Right...

60
00:06:35,485 --> 00:06:37,404
Mr. Burton, sir.

61
00:06:39,656 --> 00:06:42,702
Sometime tomorrow,
the governor wants a word.

62
00:06:44,621 --> 00:06:49,376
He wants you to coach
my football team.

63
00:06:49,459 --> 00:06:52,630
Little word of advice:

64
00:06:55,883 --> 00:06:59,470
You're gonna smile nicely
and say no.

65
00:06:59,554 --> 00:07:01,515
Move it, Meehan!
All right!

66
00:07:01,556 --> 00:07:06,521
What did you say?
That's "Mr. Hayter, sir" to you.

67
00:07:06,603 --> 00:07:08,189
Do you understand?

68
00:07:08,272 --> 00:07:10,817
I think you need a little reminder
of Mr. Burton's orders.

69
00:07:16,699 --> 00:07:20,202
You won't coach...

70
00:07:20,287 --> 00:07:23,290
that football team, okay?

71
00:07:26,668 --> 00:07:28,670
Stand there
where I can see you.

72
00:07:32,550 --> 00:07:34,345
Stow your kit top right.

73
00:07:35,928 --> 00:07:38,682
All right, lads.
New cell mate for you.

74
00:07:38,724 --> 00:07:42,144
I'm sure you recognize him. He used
to be a somebody once upon a time.

75
00:07:51,781 --> 00:07:54,575
Out you go. Got plenty of time
to get to know your new playmates.

76
00:07:56,577 --> 00:07:58,205
Work assignment, C wing.

77
00:08:02,793 --> 00:08:06,422
Got you an apprentice.
He used to be a sweeper.

78
00:08:06,463 --> 00:08:09,634
Comedian.
Enjoy it, Meehan.

79
00:08:11,636 --> 00:08:14,723
I've got some advice for you.

80
00:08:14,765 --> 00:08:16,225
Thanks. I'm a bit short
on advice today.

81
00:08:16,309 --> 00:08:20,271
This will change your life.
Do you see that?

82
00:08:20,354 --> 00:08:24,610
Be very careful of those. Some of
the boys have a crap in the night...

83
00:08:24,651 --> 00:08:28,280
wrap it and airmail it
out the window.

84
00:08:28,363 --> 00:08:29,699
Here, use this.

85
00:08:31,742 --> 00:08:33,578
Glamorous job, huh?

86
00:08:33,620 --> 00:08:36,999
Stick it in the bin
and follow me, okay?

87
00:08:38,793 --> 00:08:40,461
Come on!

88
00:08:46,009 --> 00:08:49,137
Do you know who that is?
Oi, Meehan.

89
00:08:49,221 --> 00:08:50,556
Here.

90
00:08:50,639 --> 00:08:53,100
Not the muscle, the other one.

91
00:08:53,183 --> 00:08:55,645
Christ, he's got old.

92
00:08:55,687 --> 00:08:58,732
Thirty years will do that to you.

93
00:08:58,815 --> 00:09:00,735
Still thinks he's Al Capone.

94
00:09:00,817 --> 00:09:03,779
You'd better go over.

95
00:09:10,746 --> 00:09:14,791
You know who I am?
Charlie Sykes.

96
00:09:16,002 --> 00:09:18,086
I run this nick.

97
00:09:18,171 --> 00:09:19,921
I've been told.

98
00:09:23,009 --> 00:09:25,346
I lost a great deal of money...

99
00:09:25,429 --> 00:09:27,848
on an England/Germany game
a few years back...

100
00:09:27,890 --> 00:09:32,686
after one of the Englanders
gave away a very suspect penalty...

101
00:09:32,729 --> 00:09:35,565
after 72 minutes of playing time.

102
00:09:40,404 --> 00:09:43,491
So I think that you owe me.

103
00:09:49,915 --> 00:09:53,252
Come on, superstar.
Tour's not over.

104
00:09:55,672 --> 00:09:58,508
You know, it's not gonna
be easy for you in here.

105
00:09:58,592 --> 00:10:01,636
What's everyone's problem?

106
00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:04,599
You really wanna know?

107
00:10:04,682 --> 00:10:07,060
Most of the guys
in here have nothing.

108
00:10:07,143 --> 00:10:10,605
Never had to start with.
But you...

109
00:10:10,689 --> 00:10:13,566
you had everything
they ever dreamed of...

110
00:10:13,609 --> 00:10:15,569
and you threw it all away.

111
00:10:48,106 --> 00:10:50,900
It's the superstar!
Danny Meehan.

112
00:10:50,942 --> 00:10:53,279
It's the thingy.

113
00:10:53,362 --> 00:10:55,866
Fuckin' hell, the Mean Machine!

114
00:10:55,948 --> 00:10:59,870
I bet you've got a few stories
haven't you, eh? All thethe

115
00:10:59,953 --> 00:11:02,915
all the, you know,
the pussy and all that thing.

116
00:11:02,956 --> 00:11:05,043
Funny enough, no.
Yeah?

117
00:11:05,125 --> 00:11:07,045
So what, big shot.

118
00:11:07,128 --> 00:11:09,214
I know all about fame.
I was a face.

119
00:11:09,255 --> 00:11:11,508
I was a face myself.
I was the man.

120
00:11:11,591 --> 00:11:15,012
The late '80s, all around the raves,
all that, fuckin' vroom!

121
00:11:15,095 --> 00:11:17,431
I was the top fuckin' man!

122
00:11:17,473 --> 00:11:22,312
My food?
Oh, Danny boy

123
00:11:24,189 --> 00:11:27,734
Anything you need,
I'm a onestop shop, okay?

124
00:11:36,995 --> 00:11:40,374
Anything you want,
I can get it for you.

125
00:11:42,001 --> 00:11:44,587
I've just had that from Mr. Fix It
over there, throwing the beans.

126
00:11:44,670 --> 00:11:46,590
Nitro?
Keep away from him, mate.

127
00:11:46,672 --> 00:11:48,967
Gets in with all the,
like, newcomers...

128
00:11:49,009 --> 00:11:51,470
so that he can hustle them.

129
00:11:51,512 --> 00:11:53,473
And what's your angle?

130
00:11:53,514 --> 00:11:56,601
If you want any of life's
little luxurieschocolate...

131
00:11:56,685 --> 00:11:59,979
toothpaste, soft toilet paper

132
00:12:00,021 --> 00:12:02,024
Massive is your man.

133
00:12:03,359 --> 00:12:05,903
Massive?
It's ironic.

134
00:12:08,614 --> 00:12:10,409
Right, Raj, you be black.

135
00:12:10,492 --> 00:12:12,661
No, man, I'll be white.
Raji, just chill, man.

136
00:12:12,704 --> 00:12:15,580
Don't fight it. You got a black nose.
You saying I'm black?

137
00:12:15,665 --> 00:12:18,710
Well, that makes me
the first Iranian from Babylon.

138
00:12:20,044 --> 00:12:22,380
Oh, look.
The neighborhood star's in town.

139
00:12:22,463 --> 00:12:24,967
Put the kettle on, Raji.
Oh, would you like any biscuits?

140
00:12:25,050 --> 00:12:27,803
I never asked to be put in here.
What, and we did?

141
00:12:27,886 --> 00:12:31,266
I don't need this.
You don't need this?

142
00:12:32,349 --> 00:12:34,019
Let me tell you
what we don't need.

143
00:12:34,060 --> 00:12:38,399
We don't need you,
another body, in here.

144
00:12:38,482 --> 00:12:43,488
Ain't nothin' personal, pal.
It's just, I don't fuckin' like you.

145
00:12:43,571 --> 00:12:46,908
Oh, our star looks beat, Troj.

146
00:12:46,992 --> 00:12:50,079
Yeah, he needs to chill.
Yeah, he's had a hard day at work.

147
00:12:50,162 --> 00:12:52,206
Any requests, star?

148
00:13:20,572 --> 00:13:23,492
The legendary Broadhurst Monk.

149
00:13:24,743 --> 00:13:26,661
Shipped in
about six months ago...

150
00:13:26,746 --> 00:13:29,123
but they still have him down
on the special unit.

151
00:13:29,206 --> 00:13:31,167
Why?

152
00:13:31,250 --> 00:13:34,420
Apparently he killed 23 men
with his bare hands.

153
00:13:36,590 --> 00:13:38,550
Maybe I should take up karate.

154
00:13:38,592 --> 00:13:40,804
Oh, that was before
he took up karate.

155
00:13:41,970 --> 00:13:44,681
Don't mess with him.
Not even the screws.

156
00:13:44,766 --> 00:13:48,938
Not even when he's all cuffed up.

157
00:13:54,695 --> 00:13:57,197
That the famous footballer?
Exfootballer.

158
00:13:57,279 --> 00:14:00,033
He's just a number now.

159
00:14:00,784 --> 00:14:02,120
Chief.

160
00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:04,746
Stand there.

161
00:14:05,790 --> 00:14:08,459
Danny Meehan.

162
00:14:08,501 --> 00:14:10,963
Well, it is a pleasure
to meet you.

163
00:14:11,004 --> 00:14:14,759
I'm a big football fan. Big.

164
00:14:15,801 --> 00:14:18,012
What do you think
of amateur football?

165
00:14:19,221 --> 00:14:20,639
It's amateur.

166
00:14:22,809 --> 00:14:27,148
Yes. Well, I'm sure we're not
a match for the pros...

167
00:14:27,230 --> 00:14:29,191
but we do have our own team.

168
00:14:29,275 --> 00:14:32,403
Southern division, semipros.

169
00:14:32,487 --> 00:14:36,867
And we have a chance of winning the
division this year, getting promotion.

170
00:14:36,951 --> 00:14:39,912
We have been runnersup before...

171
00:14:39,995 --> 00:14:43,374
but first is first
and second is nowhere.

172
00:14:44,625 --> 00:14:46,294
I want you to train the team.

173
00:14:46,378 --> 00:14:49,882
Use your professional experience.

174
00:14:51,508 --> 00:14:55,096
Well, I haven't played
football for years and...

175
00:14:55,179 --> 00:14:57,600
I'm a little bit
out of condition at the moment.

176
00:15:04,900 --> 00:15:08,360
I pulled a lot of strings
to get you assigned to my prison.

177
00:15:09,738 --> 00:15:14,576
I'm sorry.
I'm just not your man.

178
00:15:18,164 --> 00:15:21,502
We'll stick a pin in it for now.
Out.

179
00:15:22,668 --> 00:15:26,757
Mr. Burton, a quick word if I may.
Sir?

180
00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:30,135
I've spent a fortune
on this team for no return.

181
00:15:30,220 --> 00:15:32,472
I am the coach of this team.
With the amount of money...

182
00:15:32,554 --> 00:15:35,935
that I've spent, we should have
bloody won the World Cup by now.

183
00:15:36,017 --> 00:15:38,396
You cannot put a prisoner
in charge of the guards' team.

184
00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:41,190
Just get it done, please.

185
00:15:43,192 --> 00:15:45,319
I wouldn't get too close, miss.
Why?

186
00:15:45,362 --> 00:15:47,572
You're not dangerous,
are you, Mr. Footballer?

187
00:15:47,656 --> 00:15:50,617
Only if you've got the ball, miss.
Get out!

188
00:15:51,869 --> 00:15:54,664
Hey, Danny boy,
I can get you anything.

189
00:15:54,705 --> 00:15:57,083
Anything that's not on the menu.
Know what I mean?

190
00:15:59,377 --> 00:16:01,296
Is that stink you, Meehan?

191
00:16:01,380 --> 00:16:03,298
Don't you poke me again.

192
00:16:04,759 --> 00:16:07,846
Don't you start growing
a spine, footballer.

193
00:16:07,887 --> 00:16:09,305
Bollocks.

194
00:16:15,563 --> 00:16:18,650
Hands behind your neck, Meehan!
Hands behind your neck!

195
00:16:18,733 --> 00:16:22,487
Hands behind your neck!
Bitch, shut up!

196
00:16:22,571 --> 00:16:25,533
Hands behind your neck, Meehan!
You bitch!

197
00:16:25,615 --> 00:16:29,620
Let go! Let go, Meehan!
Let go of the baton, Meehan!

198
00:16:29,704 --> 00:16:32,541
Let go of the baton, Meehan!
Fuckin'

199
00:16:39,716 --> 00:16:42,634
Pack it in.
Pack it in.

200
00:17:06,496 --> 00:17:10,250
Razzledazzle,
3:00, Kempton Park.

201
00:17:10,334 --> 00:17:13,546
Five thousand pounds, please.

202
00:17:14,964 --> 00:17:16,006
To win.

203
00:17:18,676 --> 00:17:21,304
All this lovely fresh air, eh?

204
00:17:21,388 --> 00:17:25,810
Wouldn't you rather be out there
on the pitch, coaching?

205
00:17:25,892 --> 00:17:28,396
I just wanna
keep my head down...

206
00:17:28,479 --> 00:17:31,774
do my 12 months and I'm going home.
Twelve months, yes.

207
00:17:31,817 --> 00:17:34,111
But that's with parole.

208
00:17:34,152 --> 00:17:36,739
And that's before
you assaulted another inmate...

209
00:17:36,822 --> 00:17:39,074
and attacked my staff.
Wait a minute.

210
00:17:39,158 --> 00:17:42,245
Three years.
That's your sentence.

211
00:17:42,328 --> 00:17:45,415
So you could be with us
for some time. Hmm?

212
00:17:49,837 --> 00:17:51,839
Take him back to solitary.

213
00:18:09,484 --> 00:18:13,071
Psst. Have a nice week's holiday.
Yeah, lovely.

214
00:18:13,155 --> 00:18:15,408
There is a way out.
What?

215
00:18:15,491 --> 00:18:18,995
Listen. Convince the governor
the best way to train the guards...

216
00:18:19,078 --> 00:18:21,832
is to play a really tough match
against a team of cons...

217
00:18:21,874 --> 00:18:24,001
with you as the captain.

218
00:18:25,210 --> 00:18:27,921
Well, pros always have
a preseason friendly.

219
00:18:31,551 --> 00:18:33,511
Well, what do you think,
Mr. Burton?

220
00:18:38,893 --> 00:18:40,853
Could be winwin for everybody.

221
00:18:42,229 --> 00:18:44,191
Well, could this work, Meehan?

222
00:18:44,232 --> 00:18:46,193
Yeah.
But I need time to prep.

223
00:18:46,234 --> 00:18:48,529
And I get to pick my own team.

224
00:18:48,570 --> 00:18:51,698
Ooh, I could get a real F.A. ref.

225
00:18:51,741 --> 00:18:53,785
There's one at my golf club.

226
00:18:53,868 --> 00:18:56,704
That'd be good.
One more thing.

227
00:18:56,789 --> 00:19:00,042
What goes on on the pitch,
stays on the pitch.

228
00:19:01,210 --> 00:19:05,381
Deal?
Goes without saying.

229
00:19:07,217 --> 00:19:09,469
I am a marketing genius.

230
00:19:13,724 --> 00:19:17,020
You better get yourself some rest,
superstar. Busy day tomorrow.

231
00:19:18,354 --> 00:19:20,565
We'll see.

232
00:19:20,607 --> 00:19:24,320
Oi, remember,
anything you need.

233
00:19:24,402 --> 00:19:26,530
I'm fine. Thanks.
Yeah?

234
00:19:26,614 --> 00:19:29,450
It's not what I heard.
What?

235
00:19:29,534 --> 00:19:32,079
I could have been a pro, you know.
I was good. I was very good.

236
00:19:32,161 --> 00:19:35,582
They were gonna take me on, only I
had a bit of trouble and blah, blah.

237
00:19:36,625 --> 00:19:38,920
The old knees, I suppose, yeah?

238
00:19:40,755 --> 00:19:42,674
Bomb making.

239
00:19:44,175 --> 00:19:46,136
Otherwise, you know.

240
00:19:46,177 --> 00:19:49,640
Well, I'm sure it was
a big loss to the game.

241
00:19:49,722 --> 00:19:52,269
I've gotta go,
but I'll catch you later.

242
00:19:55,439 --> 00:19:57,774
Nitro.

243
00:19:57,858 --> 00:20:00,610
Dickhead.

244
00:20:00,652 --> 00:20:04,782
Yes, Razzledazzle, came second.

245
00:20:04,866 --> 00:20:08,328
What's the problem, darling?
Well, that's not possible.

246
00:20:08,369 --> 00:20:11,622
It's very possible, sweets.
That's not possible.

247
00:20:11,665 --> 00:20:14,960
I think you owe me
five G, darling.

248
00:20:15,002 --> 00:20:16,962
Have a nice day.

249
00:20:19,007 --> 00:20:21,176
So what happened to your marketing,
Mr. Genius?

250
00:20:21,343 --> 00:20:24,638
It's early days yet. You gotta
give it a little bit of time, Dan.

251
00:20:24,679 --> 00:20:27,099
Oi, Danny.
Over here, mate. Over here.

252
00:20:27,183 --> 00:20:29,560
Here we go.

253
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:35,859
Now I can say I've had a kick
about with Danny the Mean Machine.

254
00:20:35,943 --> 00:20:39,405
Whoowhoo! Burning in me head!
Burning in me head!

255
00:20:41,532 --> 00:20:44,244
It's all right.
I'll go and get it.

256
00:20:49,166 --> 00:20:51,502
Found a new bum chum, have we?

257
00:20:51,544 --> 00:20:56,007
Makes you feel big, does he?
He's just using you.

258
00:20:56,049 --> 00:21:00,471
Once he finds his feet in here, he'll
dump you on your fat, black arse...

259
00:21:00,554 --> 00:21:02,890
you jumpedup little shit.

260
00:21:02,932 --> 00:21:05,602
Mr. Ratchett, sir,
whilst I don't wish to be rude...

261
00:21:05,684 --> 00:21:09,564
I believe you watched too many Tarzan
films as an impressionable child.

262
00:21:12,025 --> 00:21:16,155
Don't you get fuckin' smart
with me. You understand?

263
00:21:16,238 --> 00:21:18,157
Now get outta my sights.

264
00:21:32,382 --> 00:21:34,509
What happened to you?

265
00:21:34,592 --> 00:21:36,302
Nothing.

266
00:21:38,389 --> 00:21:41,977
Sykes's boys look pretty useful.

267
00:21:42,059 --> 00:21:43,728
Don't even think about it.

268
00:21:43,769 --> 00:21:46,898
Who do you think's been
stoppin' everyone from playin'?

269
00:22:02,041 --> 00:22:03,667
I loved your work, man.

270
00:22:05,086 --> 00:22:07,088
Sorry?

271
00:22:07,130 --> 00:22:10,300
I never believed any of the talk.
I can't believe it.

272
00:22:10,384 --> 00:22:12,303
Here you are.

273
00:22:13,387 --> 00:22:15,431
Cheers.

274
00:22:17,392 --> 00:22:19,644
That buys you
three across, mate.

275
00:22:19,727 --> 00:22:22,939
Then you can teach me.
Have a nice one.

276
00:22:22,982 --> 00:22:25,568
Will you teach me, yeah?

277
00:22:25,651 --> 00:22:26,986
Teach you what?

278
00:22:28,153 --> 00:22:31,450
All that, you know,
all them soccer skills.

279
00:22:31,491 --> 00:22:33,952
All that.

280
00:22:37,331 --> 00:22:39,292
Sorry, mate, do what?

281
00:22:39,333 --> 00:22:41,836
You know, like the pros.
All that caper.

282
00:22:43,213 --> 00:22:45,715
Yeah?

283
00:22:45,799 --> 00:22:48,384
I gotta go, but we'll stick
a pin in it, all right?

284
00:22:48,469 --> 00:22:50,429
We'll stick a pin in it,
eh, Dan? Lovely.

285
00:22:50,513 --> 00:22:52,431
Fan club.

286
00:22:52,515 --> 00:22:54,434
Bloody stalker.

287
00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:57,521
What's three across?

288
00:22:57,562 --> 00:22:59,524
What?

289
00:22:59,564 --> 00:23:02,318
I just saw a bloke pay money
for a strip of crossword.

290
00:23:02,360 --> 00:23:04,529
Ah, Sykes.

291
00:23:04,612 --> 00:23:08,242
Yeah, three across,
four letters...

292
00:23:08,324 --> 00:23:10,244
"acid."

293
00:23:10,327 --> 00:23:13,706
You see, the governor lets Sykes
get his Racing Times...

294
00:23:13,789 --> 00:23:16,583
and other papers
special delivery.

295
00:23:16,668 --> 00:23:20,088
He thinks it helps Sykes
work out form...

296
00:23:20,171 --> 00:23:22,550
and give him tips.

297
00:23:22,632 --> 00:23:25,928
He doesn't know that
they're presoaked in acid.

298
00:23:26,011 --> 00:23:29,182
He's actually smuggling
Sykes's drugs in for him.

299
00:23:29,223 --> 00:23:35,147
He came second,
and it cost me 5,000 pounds.

300
00:23:35,230 --> 00:23:37,399
You must have made
the wrong bet.

301
00:23:39,402 --> 00:23:41,362
"W" for win.

302
00:23:43,740 --> 00:23:45,658
Win.

303
00:23:47,703 --> 00:23:49,997
It's got smudged in the rain.

304
00:23:51,499 --> 00:23:54,210
"EW."

305
00:23:54,294 --> 00:23:56,255
"EW" means to place.

306
00:24:02,761 --> 00:24:04,889
It's a fuckin' disgrace,
if you ask me.

307
00:24:07,433 --> 00:24:10,103
Meehan fraternizing
with that shower of shit.

308
00:24:10,187 --> 00:24:13,107
What do you want, Tompkinson?

309
00:24:13,149 --> 00:24:14,817
I was thinking.
Now, I know

310
00:24:14,900 --> 00:24:18,572
I know that I can help you,
Mr. Ratchett, sir, you know.

311
00:24:18,654 --> 00:24:20,824
Information and all.
Blah, blah. Whatever.

312
00:24:20,907 --> 00:24:23,494
Help yourself, more like.
I'm sick of this place.

313
00:24:23,577 --> 00:24:28,041
I need to get a transfer.
Yeah? HMP Silver Sands.

314
00:24:28,124 --> 00:24:30,877
Away from the influence
of all these criminals, sir.

315
00:24:34,590 --> 00:24:37,259
You keep me posted.

316
00:24:46,813 --> 00:24:49,774
Oh, look.
A monkey learning new tricks.

317
00:24:49,816 --> 00:24:51,776
Why don't you just
leave me alone, man?

318
00:24:51,818 --> 00:24:55,029
Because I don't like
uppity coons, that's why.

319
00:24:55,113 --> 00:24:57,031
Listen, man.
No, you listen!

320
00:24:59,118 --> 00:25:01,078
You animal.
Animal?

321
00:25:01,161 --> 00:25:03,998
You callin' me a fuckin' animal?

322
00:25:04,082 --> 00:25:06,584
I'll open you up
like a tin of fuckin' beans!

323
00:25:06,668 --> 00:25:08,962
Hey, stop him!
Someone stop him!

324
00:25:09,004 --> 00:25:13,300
When did you get balls big enough
to fuck with me, you fuckin' scum?

325
00:25:18,514 --> 00:25:21,644
Mass, are you all right? Christ,
he needs a doctor! Get a doctor!

326
00:25:52,971 --> 00:25:54,889
That fuckin' Meehan.

327
00:26:29,513 --> 00:26:32,349
Mr. Burton, have you missed me?

328
00:26:32,390 --> 00:26:35,937
You might be the governor's pet
project, Meehan, but don't push it.

329
00:26:42,443 --> 00:26:46,490
It's called sunlight. Think of it
as a privilege which can be withdrawn.

330
00:26:48,700 --> 00:26:51,579
Danny boy.

331
00:26:51,662 --> 00:26:55,416
Well, come on then, star.

332
00:26:57,377 --> 00:27:01,090
They're saying thanks
for saving Massive.

333
00:27:01,173 --> 00:27:05,595
Where's your manners?
What would your old mum say?

334
00:27:05,678 --> 00:27:08,181
Fuck me.
Wish I'd met her.

335
00:27:08,265 --> 00:27:13,020
Let's see how good you are. Sort
yourselves out. Skins v. shirts.

336
00:27:14,814 --> 00:27:17,608
What's that?
I'm your manager.

337
00:27:17,692 --> 00:27:20,362
Since when?
Don't bother giving me orders.

338
00:27:20,404 --> 00:27:23,198
Look, stop bitchin', bitch.

339
00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:25,367
Dan, have a word.
Shut it, Massive.

340
00:27:25,450 --> 00:27:28,121
Oi, lads, want a game?

341
00:27:28,204 --> 00:27:30,081
Fuck off!

342
00:27:30,123 --> 00:27:32,500
Come, Dan.
Plenty of room over there.

343
00:27:33,626 --> 00:27:35,212
Shoot!

344
00:27:50,938 --> 00:27:53,149
Yes, yes, Troj, it's up!

345
00:28:01,493 --> 00:28:03,953
What'd you think?
Bring the clipboard.

346
00:28:06,623 --> 00:28:07,958
Five.

347
00:28:10,628 --> 00:28:13,130
Three.

348
00:28:16,008 --> 00:28:17,260
A generous one.

349
00:28:20,096 --> 00:28:21,598
Seven.
Seven?

350
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:23,517
You missed two.

351
00:28:30,275 --> 00:28:31,693
Ten.
Eight.

352
00:28:31,776 --> 00:28:33,362
My mum could have scored
from that distance.

353
00:28:33,445 --> 00:28:36,365
Still.
Yeah, I know.

354
00:28:36,449 --> 00:28:39,577
Right, lads, over here. We'll try a
Left hand down.

355
00:28:39,660 --> 00:28:43,749
Right hand down.
Clap.

356
00:28:43,832 --> 00:28:46,084
Up, run.

357
00:28:46,960 --> 00:28:50,047
Bollocks.
One, two...

358
00:28:50,130 --> 00:28:51,590
three, four
I don't know.

359
00:28:51,674 --> 00:28:56,471
I wouldn't mind a crack at the guards.
I'm sorry. I missed that.

360
00:28:56,513 --> 00:28:58,598
Just saying, be a laugh.

361
00:28:58,683 --> 00:29:01,268
Well, that's the Scots
all over, isn't it?

362
00:29:01,352 --> 00:29:03,896
On the firm when it suits them...

363
00:29:03,981 --> 00:29:07,359
and the next minute they're
all mistyeyed and independent.

364
00:29:08,944 --> 00:29:12,489
I was only saying
And I'm saying no.

365
00:29:12,574 --> 00:29:16,034
I think we're going to have
to work on the stamina, lads.

366
00:29:22,877 --> 00:29:26,380
I'll pay at the end of the month.
No, sweets.

367
00:29:26,464 --> 00:29:28,924
It's cash on the nail.
Well, I haven't got it.

368
00:29:29,009 --> 00:29:31,970
Well, sell the nice
new Saab then, love.

369
00:29:32,053 --> 00:29:34,431
How'd you know about that?

370
00:29:34,514 --> 00:29:36,434
Pay us or we'll torch the motor.

371
00:29:36,516 --> 00:29:40,438
You can pay us out of the
insurance. There you go, sorted.

372
00:29:40,521 --> 00:29:44,692
I was told you were reasonable.
Reasonable, sweetheart?

373
00:29:44,735 --> 00:29:47,738
Reasonable is how come you ain't
sitting in a pool of your own piss...

374
00:29:47,779 --> 00:29:51,283
wondering how to get up
with smashed knees and elbows.

375
00:29:51,367 --> 00:29:53,161
Okay?

376
00:29:53,244 --> 00:29:55,205
Big kiss.

377
00:30:10,139 --> 00:30:12,892
Looking forward to
getting a thrashing, Meehan?

378
00:30:12,933 --> 00:30:16,897
If it means getting out early, I'll
take another beating from your mob.

379
00:30:16,979 --> 00:30:20,233
Who said anything about a beating?
I'm talking about the match.

380
00:30:20,275 --> 00:30:22,277
Come on.
I've seen your lot in action.

381
00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:29,536
I don't run my ship like that.

382
00:30:29,577 --> 00:30:32,665
Are you making a complaint?
No.

383
00:30:34,750 --> 00:30:36,710
Lock it up!

384
00:30:44,135 --> 00:30:46,221
Oi.
What's the matter?

385
00:30:46,304 --> 00:30:49,392
Did you have a nice chat
with your chum Burton, eh?

386
00:30:49,475 --> 00:30:51,394
Ain't you got any hobbies?

387
00:30:51,477 --> 00:30:53,896
You sleep
with one eye open, son.

388
00:30:53,938 --> 00:30:55,898
Whatever.

389
00:31:26,934 --> 00:31:28,895
Hello, Danny boy.
Nitro.

390
00:31:28,937 --> 00:31:32,774
I've been wondering, Dan.
I think you need a manager.

391
00:31:32,816 --> 00:31:35,403
The tactics and all that,
well, I am the business.

392
00:31:35,444 --> 00:31:37,571
Massive's manager.

393
00:31:37,655 --> 00:31:41,951
I know, but I'm better than him,
because I had trials, didn't I? So

394
00:31:42,035 --> 00:31:45,205
We all had trials, mate.
That's why we're here.

395
00:31:46,039 --> 00:31:49,543
Fuck off.
Fuck off!

396
00:31:49,627 --> 00:31:52,504
Football trials, yeah?

397
00:31:52,589 --> 00:31:54,591
I could be the
I could be the physio.

398
00:31:54,674 --> 00:31:57,344
Oh, no, no, wait there.
I could be the pharmacist.

399
00:31:57,427 --> 00:31:59,430
Get the lads all pepped up
and all that business.

400
00:31:59,513 --> 00:32:03,142
I don't think so, mate.

401
00:32:03,226 --> 00:32:05,436
Good job he likes you.

402
00:32:05,479 --> 00:32:07,981
He blew up five people
he didn't.

403
00:32:08,023 --> 00:32:10,275
They're stupid, you know.

404
00:32:10,360 --> 00:32:13,862
They won't even let me in their
shitty squad or nothing like that.

405
00:32:13,947 --> 00:32:17,784
I don't give a fuck about their
fuckin' squad! Do you understand me?

406
00:32:17,825 --> 00:32:20,621
If you want out
of this fuckin' prison...

407
00:32:20,663 --> 00:32:22,957
you gotta come up with something
to spoil their little party.

408
00:32:22,998 --> 00:32:27,002
Otherwise, you're fucked.

409
00:32:27,087 --> 00:32:30,924
Okay, okay, okay, relax.
Be in the atrium...

410
00:32:31,007 --> 00:32:32,926
11.: 00 tomorrow morning.

411
00:32:33,009 --> 00:32:34,971
Ah, Mr. Burton.
Thank you.

412
00:32:35,053 --> 00:32:37,265
It's only a paper.
Mmhmm.

413
00:32:37,348 --> 00:32:41,352
One down, two words
you're nicked.

414
00:32:41,436 --> 00:32:45,148
Do you know the penalty for possessing
illegal substances in a prison?

415
00:32:45,232 --> 00:32:46,984
Search him.

416
00:32:50,362 --> 00:32:52,323
What you looking at, freak?

417
00:32:52,365 --> 00:32:55,827
You were grassed up.
Eh?

418
00:32:55,911 --> 00:32:59,498
That dodgy fuckin' Meehan is getting
well pally with Mr. Burton.

419
00:32:59,582 --> 00:33:02,335
I've seen 'em talking.

420
00:33:19,646 --> 00:33:22,316
What are you doing, Ketch?
No one likes a rat, Danny boy.

421
00:33:22,399 --> 00:33:25,361
What do you mean a rat, eh, Chiv?
The big man's right.

422
00:33:25,403 --> 00:33:27,822
We're gonna see what we can do
about them beady eyes, eh?

423
00:33:27,906 --> 00:33:30,033
Fuck, you know it weren't me.

424
00:33:30,116 --> 00:33:33,370
"You know it's not me."
Which one am I gonna burst?

425
00:33:33,454 --> 00:33:35,831
You choose
the left or the right.

426
00:33:35,915 --> 00:33:37,876
For fuck's sake!
Go on, pop it!

427
00:33:37,917 --> 00:33:40,253
Fucking hold him still!
Hurry up, you Scots bastard!

428
00:33:40,295 --> 00:33:42,756
Who you calling a Scots bastard?
You, you twat!

429
00:33:47,345 --> 00:33:50,973
I cut myself shaving.
Nosebleed. It's the altitude.

430
00:33:55,562 --> 00:33:57,648
Ooh, you wanna get that seen to.

431
00:34:00,609 --> 00:34:03,446
Right, that's
a yellow card, gentlemen.

432
00:34:03,530 --> 00:34:05,448
Behave yourselves.

433
00:34:13,666 --> 00:34:16,002
You wanna be more careful
with this.

434
00:34:19,965 --> 00:34:21,925
You could have had my eye out.

435
00:34:46,453 --> 00:34:48,873
Thanks, by the way.

436
00:34:48,957 --> 00:34:52,001
You saved me a lot of grief
back there.

437
00:34:52,085 --> 00:34:54,004
Sorry about that.

438
00:34:54,087 --> 00:34:55,755
That's all right.

439
00:34:55,839 --> 00:34:58,884
Anyway, you need a few more players.

440
00:34:58,968 --> 00:35:01,345
What about your lot over there?
Don't think so.

441
00:35:01,387 --> 00:35:04,850
Not against Sykes's lot. Not that
some of them wouldn't be up for it.

442
00:35:04,891 --> 00:35:07,769
What makes you bulletproof?
He's not...

443
00:35:07,853 --> 00:35:10,314
but he's well friendly with one
bloke that Sykes is nervous about.

444
00:35:10,355 --> 00:35:12,482
Who?
The Monk, man.

445
00:35:12,524 --> 00:35:16,487
That dude is beyond mental.
And so are his pals on the outside.

446
00:35:16,571 --> 00:35:19,198
Sykes, he wants a smooth flow.

447
00:35:20,701 --> 00:35:24,455
All he really cares about
is profit.

448
00:35:26,208 --> 00:35:27,416
What money?

449
00:35:27,417 --> 00:35:28,375
What money?

450
00:35:28,418 --> 00:35:31,463
You're a betting man.
We'll make a deal.

451
00:35:32,589 --> 00:35:35,343
Let your lads play.
Win or lose...

452
00:35:35,426 --> 00:35:38,054
you call the result,
bet accordingly.

453
00:35:42,309 --> 00:35:45,896
Back to your fixing
the match routine, right?

454
00:35:45,979 --> 00:35:49,901
Now, listen.
It's like this.

455
00:35:49,984 --> 00:35:51,736
I'd never take a bet
against England...

456
00:35:51,778 --> 00:35:55,574
and I wouldn't bet
the screws against the cons.

457
00:35:58,786 --> 00:36:00,872
Then we can play to win.

458
00:36:02,623 --> 00:36:06,378
Would you think about it?
Yes, I'll think about it.

459
00:36:06,460 --> 00:36:09,339
But right now, I'm thinking
you're polluting my air.

460
00:36:11,717 --> 00:36:13,636
Now go away.

461
00:36:13,719 --> 00:36:16,723
How'd it go?
It didn't.

462
00:36:16,806 --> 00:36:19,309
Here, Dan.
Dan

463
00:36:21,728 --> 00:36:24,440
I've been thinking.
Leave the thinking to me, Billy.

464
00:36:24,523 --> 00:36:27,068
Yeah, yeah, of course, Dan.

465
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:32,324
Well, what it is, Dan

466
00:36:38,872 --> 00:36:40,917
I was wondering if

467
00:36:40,959 --> 00:36:42,919
Wondering what, Billy?

468
00:36:47,216 --> 00:36:49,301
Can I be on the team?

469
00:36:54,765 --> 00:36:58,687
The squad, Billy.
You can be on the squad.

470
00:37:01,274 --> 00:37:03,943
I won't let you down, Danny.
You know that, don't you?

471
00:37:09,033 --> 00:37:13,370
Yes, the squad, yes! Come on!
Well in, Bill. Well done!

472
00:37:15,040 --> 00:37:17,000
Yeah, the squad, the squad!

473
00:37:17,042 --> 00:37:19,002
Well in.

474
00:37:20,337 --> 00:37:23,006
Yes, you told me
they were reasonable.

475
00:37:23,090 --> 00:37:26,135
They are reasonable,
but they're businessmen.

476
00:37:26,218 --> 00:37:29,180
You got me into this,
and you can get me out.

477
00:37:29,223 --> 00:37:32,517
I opened the door,
you walked through it.

478
00:37:32,601 --> 00:37:36,856
You've been making money ever since.
So why haven't you got it?

479
00:37:36,940 --> 00:37:40,735
It is just a temporary
cashflow problem.

480
00:37:40,818 --> 00:37:43,572
The team is bleeding me dry.

481
00:37:43,655 --> 00:37:45,741
Well, get it sorted.

482
00:37:45,824 --> 00:37:48,995
Because this lot have got a bad habit
of turning cashflow problems...

483
00:37:49,037 --> 00:37:51,497
into bloodflow problems.

484
00:37:53,458 --> 00:37:56,503
I used to do double this
just for a warm up, you know.

485
00:37:56,587 --> 00:37:59,340
Anno domini, mate.

486
00:37:59,423 --> 00:38:01,425
I used to be able
to piss in one go...

487
00:38:01,509 --> 00:38:04,011
and then forget about it
for the rest of the morning.

488
00:38:07,807 --> 00:38:11,646
You never did say how come it ain't
done your nut in here being in so long.

489
00:38:11,728 --> 00:38:14,190
Only does your nut if you
don't think you should be here.

490
00:38:14,273 --> 00:38:17,945
Look at me.
Sweet old man, huh?

491
00:38:18,027 --> 00:38:22,741
Bit bumbly,
full of jailblock wisdom.

492
00:38:22,825 --> 00:38:27,372
Cornerstone of the jail,
put in with the foundations, right?

493
00:38:27,454 --> 00:38:29,541
Right.

494
00:38:29,624 --> 00:38:33,044
I didn't get to be the oldest con
for breakin' windows.

495
00:38:34,462 --> 00:38:37,091
Villains spend their lives
shitting themselves...

496
00:38:37,133 --> 00:38:40,971
that other criminals
are going to seize them.

497
00:38:41,053 --> 00:38:46,018
So they get their retaliation
in first and twice as nasty.

498
00:38:48,228 --> 00:38:51,232
A bloke was comin' after me.

499
00:38:51,316 --> 00:38:54,027
So I...

500
00:38:54,110 --> 00:38:57,072
I went around to his digs
and lobbed a grenade in the window.

501
00:38:57,113 --> 00:39:01,577
Left over after the war, you know.
Army surplus.

502
00:39:02,913 --> 00:39:05,290
I didn't know,
but he had his little baby...

503
00:39:05,332 --> 00:39:07,334
and his girl in there with him.

504
00:39:09,336 --> 00:39:13,049
The house went up like
a firecracker.

505
00:39:14,843 --> 00:39:17,387
No one came out.

506
00:39:17,470 --> 00:39:21,726
He barricaded the door with
furniture in case I came around.

507
00:39:23,519 --> 00:39:26,981
By the time they got in,
the screamin' had stopped.

508
00:39:30,027 --> 00:39:32,112
Thirteen months old.

509
00:39:32,195 --> 00:39:34,865
Learning to walk, apparently.

510
00:39:39,162 --> 00:39:42,832
Nothing I can do is ever
gonna make up for that, is it?

511
00:40:03,106 --> 00:40:05,733
You're on.
What's that, a joke?

512
00:40:05,818 --> 00:40:08,487
I'm not famous
for my sense of humor.

513
00:40:08,529 --> 00:40:11,992
I know Nitro's the grass, not you.

514
00:40:12,074 --> 00:40:15,787
One thingyou fight
one of my boys.

515
00:40:15,870 --> 00:40:20,542
Fight?
A little earner I stage now and then.

516
00:40:20,585 --> 00:40:25,172
I can't be seen giving you a free ride.
Fight who?

517
00:40:25,214 --> 00:40:27,342
Fight him.

518
00:40:27,425 --> 00:40:29,385
Soft as puppy shit,
Nick is.

519
00:40:29,510 --> 00:40:32,348
I'm an exfootballer,
Charlie, not a boxer.

520
00:40:32,389 --> 00:40:34,433
So? Kick him.

521
00:40:36,561 --> 00:40:38,520
An eye for an eye,
you bastard.

522
00:40:44,110 --> 00:40:46,030
Fucking eye for a fucking
Boo!

523
00:40:47,949 --> 00:40:52,495
Don't you do that again.
Calm down, silly beggar.

524
00:40:52,579 --> 00:40:55,582
You seem to be making more
fucking enemies by the minute.

525
00:40:55,666 --> 00:40:58,711
Yeah?
Well, I want out...

526
00:40:58,794 --> 00:41:01,505
of this shithouse!

527
00:41:01,547 --> 00:41:03,675
Please! Please!

528
00:41:06,094 --> 00:41:09,724
You're halfway home, son. I'm
taking you down to segregation now.

529
00:41:09,806 --> 00:41:12,310
That's why I'm here.
Yeah?

530
00:41:12,393 --> 00:41:14,562
Yeah.

531
00:41:14,646 --> 00:41:17,649
Just get me a transfer,
Mr. Ratchett, sir, please.

532
00:41:17,733 --> 00:41:21,654
Please. Please.
Silverino Sands, yeah?

533
00:41:21,737 --> 00:41:24,741
Boom, boom, boom, boom. I will do
anything, Mr. Ratchett, sir.

534
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:29,204
I will do anything,
Mr. Ratchett.

535
00:41:31,666 --> 00:41:34,460
You owe me for this.
Out. Now.

536
00:41:43,804 --> 00:41:46,683
We have a small change of plan.

537
00:41:46,765 --> 00:41:50,019
Nick has come over all poorly...

538
00:41:50,103 --> 00:41:52,021
so I had to bring on
a substitute.

539
00:41:53,731 --> 00:41:56,609
Walk away, Danny.
Walk away.

540
00:41:56,652 --> 00:42:01,240
Mass, this is the only way
we're gonna get these boys to play.

541
00:42:02,951 --> 00:42:08,081
In the dirty brown corner,
with a record of 350...

542
00:42:08,123 --> 00:42:11,335
all coming by the way
of the big K O...

543
00:42:11,419 --> 00:42:16,216
the heavyduty champion
of the penal world...

544
00:42:16,300 --> 00:42:21,555
Ketch, the black country bastard!

545
00:42:23,974 --> 00:42:25,392
Come on!

546
00:42:28,271 --> 00:42:33,611
And in the other equally dirty
brown corner, we have the challenger.

547
00:42:33,652 --> 00:42:36,155
Formerly known as
"The Mean Machine."

548
00:42:36,196 --> 00:42:40,619
Danny "I've had more bloody
backhanders than Boris Becker"...

549
00:42:40,660 --> 00:42:43,622
Meehan!

550
00:42:48,377 --> 00:42:51,715
Gentlemen, it's alternate punches...

551
00:42:51,797 --> 00:42:56,803
followed by one mug
of fivestar prison cognac.

552
00:42:56,845 --> 00:42:58,431
Cheers.

553
00:43:00,183 --> 00:43:03,019
No using your left hand.
No butting, biting...

554
00:43:03,062 --> 00:43:05,396
spitting, poking
or kissing, you.

555
00:43:05,481 --> 00:43:08,859
It's show time!

556
00:43:12,988 --> 00:43:15,075
First head to hit
the table loses.

557
00:43:17,327 --> 00:43:20,330
First punch to the challenger.

558
00:43:27,046 --> 00:43:30,133
Is he trying to kiss me or what?

559
00:43:37,058 --> 00:43:39,394
Keep your head off the table.

560
00:43:40,395 --> 00:43:41,813
Head up!

561
00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:46,860
Hey! Hey!
Focus, Danny. Wake up!

562
00:43:52,242 --> 00:43:54,035
He fuckin'
He fuckin'

563
00:43:59,417 --> 00:44:00,668
Get the water on him.

564
00:44:00,751 --> 00:44:03,630
Straighten yourself up, Danny.
Concentrate.

565
00:44:04,756 --> 00:44:06,466
Focus, Danny!

566
00:44:11,430 --> 00:44:13,725
Easy, easy, easy, easy.
By the way...

567
00:44:13,766 --> 00:44:16,352
I'm in here
for assault and battery.

568
00:44:19,064 --> 00:44:20,899
Troj, water!
Come on!

569
00:44:22,943 --> 00:44:24,069
Come on!

570
00:44:29,951 --> 00:44:32,830
Keep your head up.
Keep your head up!

571
00:45:07,452 --> 00:45:10,206
I'm in here for drunken assault.

572
00:45:10,288 --> 00:45:11,791
Yeah!

573
00:45:19,341 --> 00:45:22,928
First up, I'd like to
welcome Mr. Sykes's boys.

574
00:45:23,012 --> 00:45:25,139
Now watch this.

575
00:45:32,898 --> 00:45:35,610
Hey, all right!

576
00:45:35,693 --> 00:45:37,779
Nice, Danny.

577
00:45:39,447 --> 00:45:42,283
Okay, if you wanna do that,
join a circus.

578
00:45:42,368 --> 00:45:44,285
It's no good to us.

579
00:45:44,370 --> 00:45:47,081
What we need is 11 men
to play as a team. Right?

580
00:45:47,164 --> 00:45:48,457
Right!
Yes!

581
00:45:49,668 --> 00:45:52,754
That's lovely, Dan, that.
Well in.

582
00:45:54,130 --> 00:45:56,676
Okay, positions.
Now I play center midfield.

583
00:45:56,843 --> 00:45:58,885
Let's have all the midfield
players behind me

584
00:45:58,970 --> 00:46:01,139
defenders to me left,
strikers to me right.

585
00:46:01,222 --> 00:46:02,807
Come on, lads.
Come on! Come on!

586
00:46:09,815 --> 00:46:11,693
Terrific.

587
00:46:11,735 --> 00:46:13,610
Let's move on.

588
00:46:18,743 --> 00:46:20,286
That's good.
Now pass it.

589
00:46:22,705 --> 00:46:23,831
Pass it, Trojan!

590
00:46:26,375 --> 00:46:28,587
Pass it!

591
00:46:28,669 --> 00:46:31,590
Trojan, it's a team game!
Pass to our team!

592
00:46:33,425 --> 00:46:35,385
He's too greedy.

593
00:46:35,428 --> 00:46:39,140
Okay, fellas. Now the key
to set pieces is concentration...

594
00:46:39,224 --> 00:46:41,477
calculation, teamwork.

595
00:46:43,561 --> 00:46:46,023
With corners,
it's about movement...

596
00:46:47,441 --> 00:46:49,653
drawing defenders
out of position.

597
00:46:49,735 --> 00:46:52,447
When it comes to defending...

598
00:46:52,530 --> 00:46:53,991
it's about tackling...

599
00:46:54,866 --> 00:46:56,410
finesse...

600
00:46:57,452 --> 00:46:59,372
calculation.

601
00:47:01,708 --> 00:47:05,212
Now remember these simple rules
and we're in with a chance.

602
00:47:05,295 --> 00:47:06,546
Any questions?

603
00:47:09,633 --> 00:47:12,428
Lovely story.

604
00:47:12,512 --> 00:47:13,554
Yeah.

605
00:47:15,014 --> 00:47:17,434
We still need a goalkeeper.

606
00:47:17,476 --> 00:47:19,895
Somebody to boss
the defense about.

607
00:47:19,936 --> 00:47:22,941
Well, there's one man I know
who could boss our defNo. No.

608
00:47:23,023 --> 00:47:25,735
Fuck that. That's not even
worth thinking about.

609
00:47:25,818 --> 00:47:29,030
Who? Who?
No, you'll laugh your head off.

610
00:47:29,114 --> 00:47:32,117
Who?
The Monk.

611
00:47:32,201 --> 00:47:34,161
The Monk?
Can he play?

612
00:47:34,245 --> 00:47:37,456
Well, they say he could have
turned pro before he turned mad.

613
00:47:37,541 --> 00:47:40,584
How mad is he?
He's the Scot that even Scots fear.

614
00:47:40,669 --> 00:47:43,880
What did he do?
Something very dark up in Glasgow.

615
00:47:43,964 --> 00:47:47,135
I heard he ate Hannibal the Cannibal.
Let me tell you something.

616
00:47:47,218 --> 00:47:49,887
Not even the pope could get him
out of the special wing.

617
00:47:49,971 --> 00:47:52,807
Well, Monk is in
the highsecurity wing.

618
00:47:52,850 --> 00:47:57,646
So do me a favor. Maybe I can
help you with Barry the Bookie.

619
00:47:57,688 --> 00:47:59,858
I'm listening.

620
00:47:59,940 --> 00:48:02,402
Bet the game,
your guards to win.

621
00:48:02,484 --> 00:48:04,571
Price is right,
we make a killing.

622
00:48:04,654 --> 00:48:07,616
You pay off Barry
and have some left.

623
00:48:09,659 --> 00:48:11,287
Take the missus to Malaga.

624
00:48:14,791 --> 00:48:16,793
This is so illegal.

625
00:48:16,835 --> 00:48:18,879
I think "criminal" is the word.

626
00:48:21,341 --> 00:48:23,468
All right, big man.

627
00:48:23,550 --> 00:48:25,720
Sound.

628
00:48:25,803 --> 00:48:29,599
Danny Meehan, he's all right.
Know what I mean?

629
00:48:29,683 --> 00:48:31,685
He's got a wee favor
to ask you.

630
00:48:31,769 --> 00:48:33,771
Hello, Mr. Monk.

631
00:48:33,855 --> 00:48:36,315
Can you play football?
Aye.

632
00:48:36,399 --> 00:48:38,902
Good.

633
00:48:38,985 --> 00:48:40,945
Would you like to play with us?

634
00:48:41,029 --> 00:48:42,573
No.

635
00:48:45,701 --> 00:48:47,203
We're playin' the guards.

636
00:48:55,170 --> 00:48:57,964
Aye. I'm with ya.

637
00:48:58,049 --> 00:49:01,302
Sound.
Thanks a lot, Mr. Monk.

638
00:49:01,386 --> 00:49:04,430
Okay, let's try it.
Troj, you take the corner.

639
00:49:04,515 --> 00:49:07,685
It's my ball.
Mouse's ball, Troj.

640
00:49:09,229 --> 00:49:12,607
Come on, Troj.
Yeah, yeah. To me, Troj.

641
00:49:12,690 --> 00:49:14,984
It's Mouse's ball.
My ball. Whoo! Yeah!

642
00:49:21,033 --> 00:49:23,911
He's broke my bloody nose.
Let's have a look.

643
00:49:23,996 --> 00:49:26,497
Let me have a look.

644
00:49:30,168 --> 00:49:32,087
He did that on purpose.

645
00:49:32,170 --> 00:49:35,008
No, he didn't.
Yes, he did.

646
00:49:35,091 --> 00:49:38,470
Tell him
Tell him it was an accident.

647
00:49:42,599 --> 00:49:45,227
All right, it was an accident.

648
00:49:45,269 --> 00:49:47,856
Get yourself off over the back there.
He said it was an accident.

649
00:49:53,111 --> 00:49:55,614
You're not worried about the
opposition, are you, Mr. Burton?

650
00:49:57,658 --> 00:50:02,205
A team of life's losers, led by
a man who can be bought and sold.

651
00:50:02,288 --> 00:50:05,584
I don't think so.
Not when the game's about character.

652
00:50:07,127 --> 00:50:09,755
We'll give you a match.

653
00:50:09,797 --> 00:50:12,717
You'll give us a game.
I doubt whether you can match us.

654
00:50:15,470 --> 00:50:16,763
We'll see.

655
00:50:25,315 --> 00:50:28,360
One! Two! Three!

656
00:50:28,444 --> 00:50:30,696
Look up! Pass it, pass it!
Look up again!

657
00:50:30,779 --> 00:50:33,449
Well done. Nice and easy.
Let the ball do the work.

658
00:50:33,490 --> 00:50:35,701
As the ball's comin' to you,
look up.

659
00:50:35,785 --> 00:50:37,913
Start again.
Spread out. Spread out!

660
00:50:37,996 --> 00:50:41,333
Left! Left!
Up! Down!

661
00:50:42,794 --> 00:50:46,172
Strike! Strike!
Up! Down!

662
00:50:47,799 --> 00:50:50,468
Come on, Jerome.
Come on!

663
00:50:56,809 --> 00:50:59,646
Go! Go!
One, two, three, four!

664
00:50:59,688 --> 00:51:00,853
And left, and right.
And left, and right.

665
00:51:00,854 --> 00:51:04,359
And left, and right.
And left, and right.

666
00:51:04,402 --> 00:51:08,614
Hurry it up there! I told you two
to keep the center tight!

667
00:51:08,698 --> 00:51:12,201
I've also always told you
to wear tieups on your socks.

668
00:51:12,243 --> 00:51:16,081
Now you, get over there and mark up.
And you, bugger off.

669
00:51:24,924 --> 00:51:28,012
Four! Five!

670
00:51:29,804 --> 00:51:34,101
Now listen, Daniel. I'm not
putting you under pressure, right?

671
00:51:34,185 --> 00:51:36,229
But I'm burning up phone cards...

672
00:51:36,312 --> 00:51:38,982
taking bets from prisons
up and down the country.

673
00:51:39,065 --> 00:51:40,984
Oh, no.

674
00:51:41,068 --> 00:51:43,362
And despite
what the governor thinks...

675
00:51:43,446 --> 00:51:45,906
I'm betting us to win.

676
00:51:45,948 --> 00:51:48,535
So my arse is on the line.

677
00:51:48,617 --> 00:51:51,246
And by my arse,
I mean your arse.

678
00:51:53,081 --> 00:51:54,958
Okay, lads, need a volunteer.

679
00:51:55,042 --> 00:51:57,962
Yep, Dan. Dan.
Yeah, all right, Bill.

680
00:51:58,004 --> 00:52:00,173
Give Monk and Chiv a hand
with their demonstration.

681
00:52:00,256 --> 00:52:02,426
Lovely.
Cheers, Danny.

682
00:52:02,467 --> 00:52:06,096
Aye, right, so,
we are the cons...

683
00:52:06,138 --> 00:52:08,682
and they are the screws.

684
00:52:08,766 --> 00:52:12,520
So if anybody's gonna play dirty,
it's gonna be they fuckers.

685
00:52:12,604 --> 00:52:16,484
So here's one or two wee examples,
just to keep us a step ahead.

686
00:52:16,524 --> 00:52:19,862
Know what I mean?
Numero uno--

687
00:52:19,944 --> 00:52:21,864
The accidental tread on the toe.

688
00:52:21,947 --> 00:52:24,116
It's an obvious one,
but it works.

689
00:52:27,204 --> 00:52:28,789
Aw, fuck!

690
00:52:32,085 --> 00:52:35,421
Numero two

691
00:52:36,673 --> 00:52:39,385
Right, daftie.
Run towards the Monk.

692
00:52:41,595 --> 00:52:44,515
What now? Yeah?
On you go, half pace.

693
00:52:49,896 --> 00:52:53,066
The cunningly titled "elbow
in the face." Very, very effective.

694
00:52:53,150 --> 00:52:55,986
But you do tend to get sent off,
so if you're gonna use it...

695
00:52:56,027 --> 00:52:57,863
make sure the ref's not looking.

696
00:52:57,947 --> 00:53:00,325
Number four.
Hold up. Hold up.

697
00:53:00,366 --> 00:53:02,327
What happened
to number three?

698
00:53:05,706 --> 00:53:08,876
When you're helping them up...

699
00:53:08,959 --> 00:53:12,088
grab the hairs under his armpits
and twist them round.

700
00:53:14,173 --> 00:53:16,343
Hurts like a bastard, doesn't it?
Yeah.

701
00:53:16,426 --> 00:53:20,013
Number five.
Wait. I'm gonna have a sitdown.

702
00:53:20,098 --> 00:53:22,599
I don't want to hog it.
Let one of these have a go.

703
00:53:22,683 --> 00:53:26,271
You're all right, Bill. You're the
man. You're hard. Get in there.

704
00:53:29,441 --> 00:53:32,778
Yeah, as it happens, yeah.
No, go on, yeah.

705
00:53:52,009 --> 00:53:54,470
And finally,
the piece de resistance.

706
00:53:54,553 --> 00:53:57,931
Number 23.
I can't.

707
00:53:58,016 --> 00:54:00,100
Monk, stop.
I'm in a bad way, mate.

708
00:54:04,190 --> 00:54:05,775
Monk, I can't breathe!

709
00:54:05,857 --> 00:54:07,568
Oh, fuck!

710
00:54:09,278 --> 00:54:11,907
The guillotine.
Come on then. Let's move on.

711
00:54:14,242 --> 00:54:17,496
Get yourself up. You're making
the place look untidy.

712
00:54:17,579 --> 00:54:19,748
Was that all right, though, Dan?
Cream.

713
00:54:19,832 --> 00:54:22,835
Well done, lads. Finish with
a bit of shooting practice.

714
00:54:22,919 --> 00:54:25,964
Troj, you come out and lay them off.
Massive, marks out of ten.

715
00:54:30,301 --> 00:54:32,430
You done well with that lot.

716
00:54:33,597 --> 00:54:35,809
Passes the time, Doc.

717
00:54:35,891 --> 00:54:38,728
You know, it's not a crime
to admit enjoying it.

718
00:54:41,648 --> 00:54:44,484
You're becoming a sentimental
old fart, ain't you?

719
00:54:46,404 --> 00:54:47,864
Go on, Troj, hit it!

720
00:54:47,947 --> 00:54:50,450
That bloody Meehan.
Who does he think he is, eh?

721
00:54:50,492 --> 00:54:55,247
Don't you worry about Meehan.
I've got something sorted for him.

722
00:54:56,332 --> 00:54:59,502
Mr. Popular,
time to meet your friends.

723
00:55:01,170 --> 00:55:03,173
You can't put me
back on the wing, sir.

724
00:55:03,256 --> 00:55:05,550
You scratch my back...
Sykes will fuckin' kill me.

725
00:55:05,634 --> 00:55:07,803
I'll scratch yours.
Sykes will kill me.

726
00:55:07,845 --> 00:55:10,098
You know the itch
I want scratching.

727
00:55:10,180 --> 00:55:13,142
I don't want Meehan on that pitch.
You understand?

728
00:55:13,184 --> 00:55:15,520
Okay.
I know what needs to be done.

729
00:55:16,604 --> 00:55:18,524
Nice and easy.

730
00:55:20,401 --> 00:55:22,361
Right down the middle.

731
00:55:23,697 --> 00:55:25,657
And aone...

732
00:55:28,869 --> 00:55:31,371
and atwo.

733
00:55:31,456 --> 00:55:35,168
Good shot.
Good shot.

734
00:55:37,755 --> 00:55:40,174
Where you been? The governor's been
waiting. It's the end of your shift.

735
00:55:40,214 --> 00:55:43,218
I'll take him straight in.
Okay, miss.

736
00:55:43,302 --> 00:55:45,721
I've thought of a way
I can really help you.

737
00:55:47,057 --> 00:55:50,644
The sad old twat
videos all their games.

738
00:55:50,727 --> 00:55:53,855
Really?
And I've written some pointers.

739
00:55:53,898 --> 00:55:56,609
My own little dossier on the guards,
like funny habits and that.

740
00:55:56,692 --> 00:55:59,362
I'm sure you'll find it interesting.
Now can you hurry up?

741
00:55:59,403 --> 00:56:01,030
We haven't got much time.

742
00:56:02,908 --> 00:56:04,326
Quicker!

743
00:56:08,915 --> 00:56:10,625
One thing.
What?

744
00:56:10,708 --> 00:56:12,711
This is strictly sex.
I ain't gonna respect you after.

745
00:56:12,794 --> 00:56:15,880
I don't blame you.
Girls like to brag at the pub as well.

746
00:56:15,964 --> 00:56:17,716
I've heard.

747
00:56:21,179 --> 00:56:24,099
What? What? Easy.

748
00:56:24,140 --> 00:56:26,101
Change your oil, did you?

749
00:56:26,142 --> 00:56:28,228
Gentlemen should never kiss
and tell, Massive. You know that.

750
00:56:29,480 --> 00:56:31,440
I think I'd better go home.

751
00:56:31,524 --> 00:56:34,819
Massive, inside information
on the opposition.

752
00:56:34,903 --> 00:56:36,821
Read it careful.
It's really important.

753
00:56:44,038 --> 00:56:46,833
All right, Danny. There's
a meeting now in Mr. Sykes's cell.

754
00:57:03,393 --> 00:57:06,147
All right, lads, a bit of windup
material on the opposition.

755
00:57:06,230 --> 00:57:08,107
Ketch, this one's for you.

756
00:57:08,149 --> 00:57:11,153
You know old Ratchett keeps
going on about his dodgy knee.

757
00:57:11,193 --> 00:57:12,821
Well, it's the right one.

758
00:57:19,661 --> 00:57:22,290
This one is dynamite.
Marsden's daughter Donna...

759
00:57:22,373 --> 00:57:25,251
has been known to dabble in quite
a few different class A drugs.

760
00:57:25,335 --> 00:57:27,795
Let him know about it
at the right time.

761
00:57:27,837 --> 00:57:31,801
Here we go, Danny boy.
Danny boy.

762
00:57:35,013 --> 00:57:36,680
And now for our secret weapon.

763
00:57:36,765 --> 00:57:39,976
Danny, tape.
Oh, shit. I forgot it.

764
00:57:40,018 --> 00:57:44,190
Left it in me locker.
Ah, yeah, I need a piss anyway.

765
00:57:44,274 --> 00:57:46,192
Cheers, Doc.

766
00:57:46,276 --> 00:57:48,194
Sorry, boys.

767
00:57:48,278 --> 00:57:50,197
That's all right.
Get the old boy working.

768
00:58:04,921 --> 00:58:07,841
Danny, why did you do it?

769
00:58:09,761 --> 00:58:11,888
Throw that game.

770
00:58:13,223 --> 00:58:15,850
Fuck me, Jerome.
You do talk too much.

771
00:58:17,144 --> 00:58:19,438
Sorry.
No, you're all right.

772
00:58:22,651 --> 00:58:24,568
It's funny...

773
00:58:24,653 --> 00:58:26,905
but when you're in
that football world...

774
00:58:26,988 --> 00:58:29,408
you just don't realize
what it means to people.

775
00:58:29,449 --> 00:58:34,789
And you only find out how disappointed
they are when you let them down.

776
00:58:34,872 --> 00:58:37,543
I was 16
when I signed pro forms.

777
00:58:37,583 --> 00:58:39,545
Thought I was the business.

778
00:58:40,796 --> 00:58:42,881
Didn't take long for standards
to start slipping.

779
00:58:42,923 --> 00:58:48,303
Cars, booze,
bad tips for slow horses.

780
00:58:48,388 --> 00:58:51,725
You think you can handle it,
then bang

781
00:58:51,766 --> 00:58:53,768
very soon it's handling you.

782
00:58:54,937 --> 00:58:57,273
Before I was picking up trophies...

783
00:58:57,356 --> 00:58:59,568
I was 425 grand down...

784
00:59:00,651 --> 00:59:03,238
to men nasty enough to

785
00:59:03,321 --> 00:59:06,033
Well, they even would have
put the wind up Mr. Sykes.

786
00:59:07,117 --> 00:59:09,412
But they did give me
two choices

787
00:59:10,663 --> 00:59:13,375
a wheelchair for life...

788
00:59:13,458 --> 00:59:15,794
or a deliberate penalty
against the Germans.

789
00:59:17,463 --> 00:59:19,423
It's not as if I've prospered.

790
00:59:20,466 --> 00:59:22,426
Look where I've ended up.

791
00:59:26,055 --> 00:59:28,016
But I'll tell you something--

792
00:59:28,100 --> 00:59:32,438
I didn't start off as a youngster
looking to sell me country out.

793
00:59:33,731 --> 00:59:36,276
None of us planned to be here, mate.

794
00:59:36,359 --> 00:59:40,113
You're a hero in Scotland.

795
00:59:56,715 --> 01:00:00,512
Sign it, and I'll ship you
straight out of here.

796
01:00:00,595 --> 01:00:02,138
Okay.

797
01:00:02,223 --> 01:00:05,351
You know, even down here
it ain't safe from Sykes.

798
01:00:05,434 --> 01:00:07,353
He's put a price
on your head, sunshine.

799
01:00:07,436 --> 01:00:11,607
Killing Doc was a big mistake.
Fuck him.

800
01:00:11,690 --> 01:00:17,030
Where am I off to, boys? The HMP
Silver Sands, where all the rich go?

801
01:00:19,242 --> 01:00:21,536
Not exactly. No.
No?

802
01:00:21,619 --> 01:00:24,330
No. You're gonna catch
the ghost train out of here...

803
01:00:24,372 --> 01:00:27,626
to the funny farm.
The funny farm.

804
01:00:27,709 --> 01:00:30,546
Her Majesty's Prison
Broadhurst.

805
01:00:30,629 --> 01:00:33,632
What?
I'm gonna get you!

806
01:00:33,716 --> 01:00:37,387
Yeah! I'll find your house!
I'm gonna blow it up!

807
01:00:37,471 --> 01:00:41,057
No, you won't! By the time the
orderlies are finished with you...

808
01:00:41,142 --> 01:00:43,686
you won't be able
to blow your fucking nose!

809
01:00:52,195 --> 01:00:54,865
Let me out!

810
01:00:54,949 --> 01:00:56,909
I'm gonna get you!

811
01:01:17,433 --> 01:01:20,060
I reckon you're quits now,
old man.

812
01:02:35,813 --> 01:02:39,484
No, don't
don't you worry about the car.

813
01:02:39,568 --> 01:02:41,736
I'd have my bloody house
on this one.

814
01:02:41,821 --> 01:02:44,782
Done deal, darling.
Yes.

815
01:02:46,659 --> 01:02:48,578
Wanker.

816
01:02:48,662 --> 01:02:52,166
Okay, gentlemen.
You've got 90 minutes...

817
01:02:52,249 --> 01:02:56,254
to show them that when it comes
to physical and mental strength...

818
01:02:56,336 --> 01:02:58,172
they can't touch us.

819
01:02:58,256 --> 01:03:00,967
Most of them are gonna
want to mix it up out there.

820
01:03:01,010 --> 01:03:04,305
Don't get involved.

821
01:03:05,556 --> 01:03:08,809
All right, lads.
You wanna be nothing...

822
01:03:08,851 --> 01:03:13,857
numbers, prisoners, that's fine.

823
01:03:13,940 --> 01:03:17,694
If you win out there today, you'll
have something to remember forever.

824
01:03:17,779 --> 01:03:20,156
You'll talk about it
over and over.

825
01:03:20,238 --> 01:03:25,329
'Cause up and down the country cons are
sick about not being here today...

826
01:03:25,370 --> 01:03:28,791
just to have one crack
at those bastards next door.

827
01:03:28,874 --> 01:03:32,836
Let's win,
and let's win well.

828
01:03:35,048 --> 01:03:39,177
Lose, and they'll
never let you forget it.

829
01:03:39,261 --> 01:03:44,308
Run your guts out, you'll have
something here they can never touch.

830
01:03:44,391 --> 01:03:48,146
No parole boards, judges...

831
01:03:48,230 --> 01:03:50,357
or nutcase governors.

832
01:03:51,983 --> 01:03:53,986
They've got one good player.

833
01:03:54,069 --> 01:03:57,532
But he's had his moment,
and this is a team game.

834
01:03:57,615 --> 01:03:59,951
Now, ask yourselves
one question.

835
01:04:02,871 --> 01:04:05,207
Are you ready?
Yes.

836
01:04:05,290 --> 01:04:07,251
Are we?
Yes!

837
01:04:07,335 --> 01:04:09,838
Well, come on!

838
01:04:09,921 --> 01:04:12,882
So I'm lookin' at each
and every one of you lads...

839
01:04:12,966 --> 01:04:17,054
to get out there
and show them who's boss!

840
01:04:17,138 --> 01:04:18,722
Come on!

841
01:04:20,432 --> 01:04:23,103
Hold up for Mr. Sykes.

842
01:04:25,772 --> 01:04:29,068
Doc was a different generation.

843
01:04:30,528 --> 01:04:32,446
And he saved all his life.

844
01:04:32,530 --> 01:04:36,451
But before he died,
he had me sort out these.

845
01:04:40,874 --> 01:04:43,750
Come and get 'em, mates!

846
01:04:43,835 --> 01:04:47,297
Good afternoon. I'm Bob Likely. You
join us live from the recreation field.

847
01:04:47,380 --> 01:04:50,508
Yes, I'm Bob Carter. And thanks once
again to our esteemed governor

848
01:04:50,593 --> 01:04:51,760
wanker

849
01:04:51,844 --> 01:04:53,929
for providing the splendid
facilities that are here...

850
01:04:54,013 --> 01:04:56,640
as part of his progressive
rehabilitation campaign.

851
01:04:56,724 --> 01:04:59,895
For our audience who are cooped up
inside, here's a weather report.

852
01:04:59,978 --> 01:05:03,106
It's a beautiful day, Bob.
And what a day it is.

853
01:05:03,190 --> 01:05:06,486
And the waiting's over.
Yes, the guards are out first...

854
01:05:06,569 --> 01:05:07,945
fronted by Mr. Burton.

855
01:05:17,248 --> 01:05:19,333
And here comes the Mean Machine,
led out...

856
01:05:19,416 --> 01:05:22,629
by our most famous son,
Danny meehan.

857
01:05:22,711 --> 01:05:26,299
Don't worry. The boys are up for it.
I'm not worried.

858
01:05:26,383 --> 01:05:30,471
Where'd they get those uniforms?
Cheeky bastards.

859
01:05:35,601 --> 01:05:38,688
Mean Machine!
Mean Machine!

860
01:05:48,617 --> 01:05:50,202
Skip. Skip.

861
01:05:53,498 --> 01:05:55,500
Your call.
Heads.

862
01:05:57,835 --> 01:06:00,673
Heads we are, then.
Okay.

863
01:06:04,760 --> 01:06:06,804
This is the one.
Take your chances.

864
01:06:06,887 --> 01:06:09,224
Don't start anything.
If they do, finish it, okay?

865
01:06:09,306 --> 01:06:12,185
Yeah!
Come on, then!

866
01:06:16,314 --> 01:06:17,899
Simple ball every time, eh?

867
01:06:22,990 --> 01:06:26,325
Boy, Mr. Sykes,
you look the part.

868
01:06:26,410 --> 01:06:28,370
All you need now is a

869
01:06:30,080 --> 01:06:33,543
Here we go, Bob. It's the big one
we've all been waiting for.

870
01:06:33,625 --> 01:06:36,087
Longmarsh Prison guards
versus Longmarsh Prison cons.

871
01:06:36,171 --> 01:06:38,048
It's the cons to kick off.

872
01:06:47,434 --> 01:06:48,727
Ref!

873
01:06:48,809 --> 01:06:50,353
A free kick to the cons.

874
01:06:56,194 --> 01:06:58,362
Ketch has just
floored Mr. Ratchett.

875
01:06:58,446 --> 01:07:00,698
What's the matter with you?
Shut up, you pussy.

876
01:07:01,449 --> 01:07:03,326
Ow! You fat bastard!

877
01:07:03,327 --> 01:07:03,995
Ow! You fat bastard!

878
01:07:04,036 --> 01:07:05,913
Well done, Ketch.
Just be subtle.

879
01:07:06,706 --> 01:07:08,917
Which one's he, then?

880
01:07:11,377 --> 01:07:13,671
Come on. Take him out, son!

881
01:07:13,755 --> 01:07:16,592
And Trojan evades
Marsden brilliantly.

882
01:07:16,675 --> 01:07:19,553
If only he could have done that
the night he got nicked.

883
01:07:19,637 --> 01:07:21,347
Keeper plays it long.

884
01:07:22,557 --> 01:07:25,060
Walker brings it down
to the halfway line.

885
01:07:25,143 --> 01:07:27,188
And it's a misplaced pass
to Jerome McFife.

886
01:07:27,270 --> 01:07:29,857
But the everobservant Mr. Burton
kicks it back to the guards.

887
01:07:29,940 --> 01:07:32,527
It's a neat onetwo.
Walker to Burton.

888
01:07:32,568 --> 01:07:36,697
Back to Walker. He shoots.
Ooh! Just past the post.

889
01:07:36,740 --> 01:07:40,285
Almost.
And that was too close for comfort.

890
01:07:40,370 --> 01:07:42,704
Too fucking close
for my liking, Bob.

891
01:07:42,746 --> 01:07:45,708
Get up there!
Monk plays it out to Danny Meehan.

892
01:07:45,750 --> 01:07:48,254
Meehan has it in the center.
Goes forward unchallenged.

893
01:07:48,336 --> 01:07:50,046
It's a onetwo.

894
01:07:50,129 --> 01:07:52,258
And Burton has
taken Meehan's legs away.

895
01:07:52,341 --> 01:07:53,217
And Meehan does not look happy.

896
01:07:53,342 --> 01:07:54,760
That's it, Burton!

897
01:07:57,681 --> 01:08:00,600
Now, what's the matter
with the rest of you, eh?

898
01:08:00,684 --> 01:08:04,646
You four stand there. Split on
my run. I want to try something.

899
01:08:04,730 --> 01:08:07,775
Meehan to take it. Looks like
he might chip this one, Bob.

900
01:08:16,619 --> 01:08:18,203
Right at Ratchett's
crown jewels.

901
01:08:18,287 --> 01:08:21,081
It'll take more than a magic sponge
to take the sting out of that.

902
01:08:21,875 --> 01:08:24,503
Fuck me.

903
01:08:24,586 --> 01:08:26,755
For Christ's sake, ref,
that was bloody deliberate.

904
01:08:26,838 --> 01:08:29,925
Free kick. And ball.
Protect yourself at all times.

905
01:08:30,009 --> 01:08:32,595
You what?
Ten yards!

906
01:08:32,678 --> 01:08:35,599
Ten! Come away!

907
01:08:52,326 --> 01:08:55,621
Right in his carrots and onions.

908
01:08:55,705 --> 01:08:59,542
No nookie for Mr. Ratchett.
No nookie for Mrs. Ratchett neither.

909
01:08:59,626 --> 01:09:01,669
Play on!

910
01:09:01,754 --> 01:09:04,047
Just goes to show, Bob,
lightning can strike twice.

911
01:09:04,131 --> 01:09:05,466
Absofuckin'lutely, Bob.

912
01:09:05,508 --> 01:09:08,802
23 minutes of the first half to go
and it's getting heated out there.

913
01:09:08,844 --> 01:09:10,972
Oh, yeah, Bob.
Very rock and roll.

914
01:09:24,488 --> 01:09:27,658
Fuckin' hell.
He's got to get back in goal.

915
01:09:27,699 --> 01:09:29,828
Well, I ain't tellin' him.

916
01:09:38,254 --> 01:09:40,171
Piss off, you Scotch bastard.

917
01:09:40,256 --> 01:09:42,842
How's your daughter,
by the way? Donna?

918
01:09:42,883 --> 01:09:46,096
Still hanging about street corners
and that to feed the habit?

919
01:09:47,888 --> 01:09:49,391
What's up with ya?

920
01:10:06,368 --> 01:10:07,703
For Christ's sake!

921
01:10:17,381 --> 01:10:19,133
That's it, fellas!
Good teamwork!

922
01:10:23,597 --> 01:10:25,558
That is a hard
but a fair tackle, Bob.

923
01:10:25,599 --> 01:10:29,228
Yeah, it was a fair challenge.
But that wasn't.

924
01:10:29,311 --> 01:10:32,858
Oh, and this could be dangerous
for the cons, Bob.

925
01:10:32,940 --> 01:10:35,444
A free kick here.
You're back in afterwards.

926
01:10:35,527 --> 01:10:37,738
Don't think I didn't see it.
Ketch has took his drop.

927
01:10:37,779 --> 01:10:40,324
The guards look determined
to convert this.

928
01:10:40,407 --> 01:10:43,244
Make it count!
Get him!

929
01:11:10,817 --> 01:11:12,819
The Monk's collected it cleanly.

930
01:11:12,860 --> 01:11:15,781
The Monkcalm and calculated.
Looks like the therapy's paying off.

931
01:11:17,282 --> 01:11:19,369
And once again,
Monk's played it out to Trojan...

932
01:11:19,451 --> 01:11:22,998
who's again switched to the left.
He must be ambidextrous.

933
01:11:23,081 --> 01:11:25,500
I don't know about that,
but he sure can use both feet.

934
01:11:44,064 --> 01:11:46,358
Goal!

935
01:11:50,070 --> 01:11:53,407
Goal!

936
01:11:57,161 --> 01:11:58,204
Yeah!

937
01:12:02,251 --> 01:12:04,712
Beauty! You beauty!
Go on, my son! Go on, my son!

938
01:12:12,220 --> 01:12:14,806
We're all over 'em.

939
01:12:14,890 --> 01:12:18,477
Onenil, to the Mean Machine.
It's the guards to kick off.

940
01:12:18,561 --> 01:12:20,980
It's getting tough out there, Bob.
You can say that again, Bob.

941
01:12:21,063 --> 01:12:24,276
It's getting tough out there, Bob.
Never mind, Bob.

942
01:12:32,577 --> 01:12:35,497
Oh, no, Bob. It looks like
the Monk's at it again.

943
01:12:35,580 --> 01:12:36,789
Pass it!

944
01:12:50,932 --> 01:12:54,393
Do that again, I'll rip your head off.
Ref, did you hear that?

945
01:12:55,853 --> 01:12:59,066
I'm not worried.
He said it to you, not me.

946
01:12:59,148 --> 01:13:00,858
Let's go, sonny.

947
01:13:00,943 --> 01:13:03,403
What is he doing?

948
01:13:03,487 --> 01:13:06,157
Don't ask me.
You're the skipper. You tell him.

949
01:13:06,241 --> 01:13:07,700
Bollocks.

950
01:13:10,328 --> 01:13:13,081
Hold on.
Oi! You great fucker!

951
01:13:13,123 --> 01:13:16,126
Ooh, it's kicked off.
Let's just try and keep calm.

952
01:13:16,168 --> 01:13:18,254
Referee!
Go on! Get in there!

953
01:13:18,338 --> 01:13:20,298
Go on! Chin him!

954
01:13:20,381 --> 01:13:23,468
This isn't a football match!
Do him! Do him!

955
01:13:23,552 --> 01:13:26,055
Go on!
This is bollocks.

956
01:13:26,137 --> 01:13:28,432
Hey. Come on.
Hit him! Fuck you!

957
01:13:28,474 --> 01:13:32,270
This is bollocks!
What the fuck's going on here?

958
01:13:37,651 --> 01:13:39,611
Where the fuck are you,
referee?

959
01:13:40,863 --> 01:13:42,615
Excuse me. Sorry.

960
01:13:42,698 --> 01:13:45,118
Calm down, everybody!
Come on!

961
01:13:45,201 --> 01:13:47,663
Ref, how long?

962
01:13:47,745 --> 01:13:49,248
Bollocks. That'll do.

963
01:13:51,834 --> 01:13:53,919
Halftime. Come on.

964
01:13:55,337 --> 01:14:00,427
One-nil, to the mean machine
One-nil

965
01:14:02,345 --> 01:14:07,143
And what do you think you're doing?
You're supposed to throw this game.

966
01:14:07,185 --> 01:14:11,273
Yeah. The boys don't seem
to be taking much notice of me.

967
01:14:11,355 --> 01:14:14,485
Youthful exuberance.

968
01:14:14,526 --> 01:14:19,157
Shame.
Would have worked out nice.

969
01:14:19,239 --> 01:14:21,993
That's halftime. What do you think
Meehan will be saying to the boys?

970
01:14:22,035 --> 01:14:24,954
He'd be telling them that there's
only 45 minutes left to play.

971
01:14:25,039 --> 01:14:26,999
Yeah.

972
01:14:28,292 --> 01:14:30,670
Well done.
Well done.

973
01:14:32,588 --> 01:14:35,884
Settle down, boys.
Have a listen.

974
01:14:35,967 --> 01:14:38,679
We ain't won nothing yet.

975
01:14:38,720 --> 01:14:41,807
All we got is one goal. Now, this
half is when we're gonna earn it.

976
01:14:41,891 --> 01:14:45,519
Midfield, tuck in.
Get round behind the ball. Monk

977
01:14:47,981 --> 01:14:50,901
Good work, Monk. Just don't leave us
exposed at the back, all right?

978
01:14:51,818 --> 01:14:55,489
Mouse
It's me nose.

979
01:14:55,573 --> 01:14:58,785
Bill, you come on for Mouse.
Where am I playing?

980
01:14:58,868 --> 01:15:00,828
Take his place.
Come midfield with me.

981
01:15:00,913 --> 01:15:02,748
Frenchy,
have a look at his nose.

982
01:15:02,831 --> 01:15:05,292
Okay, lads, we've botched it,
but we're onenil down.

983
01:15:05,376 --> 01:15:08,421
Mr. Hayter, when the overlap comes
You think about it.

984
01:15:10,465 --> 01:15:14,887
We're getting beaten by
a bunch of worthless criminals.

985
01:15:14,929 --> 01:15:17,389
I'm doing my halftime talk, sir.

986
01:15:17,431 --> 01:15:19,725
You sit down.

987
01:15:19,810 --> 01:15:22,311
Have you forgotten who they are?

988
01:15:22,396 --> 01:15:26,733
They're the dregs of society and
they're in the next dressing room...

989
01:15:26,775 --> 01:15:29,779
and they're laughing at you
right now.

990
01:15:30,737 --> 01:15:33,157
Just remember this:

991
01:15:33,241 --> 01:15:38,205
Every man here
is playing for his job.

992
01:15:39,455 --> 01:15:41,083
Including you.

993
01:15:46,423 --> 01:15:48,842
You wanted to see me?

994
01:15:48,925 --> 01:15:50,927
Yes.

995
01:15:51,012 --> 01:15:53,973
What the hell's going on?
You wanted a game.

996
01:15:54,056 --> 01:15:57,101
Yes, but you never said
anything about winning.

997
01:15:57,185 --> 01:16:00,439
I never said nothing
about losing either.

998
01:16:00,521 --> 01:16:03,817
Before leaving us,
Nitro wrote a confession.

999
01:16:03,901 --> 01:16:06,446
He admitted to killing Doc.

1000
01:16:06,528 --> 01:16:11,076
Said you knew about it,
and that you sent Doc to your cell.

1001
01:16:11,159 --> 01:16:15,289
Now, that's accessory to murder.

1002
01:16:15,372 --> 01:16:18,000
And that's 20 years.

1003
01:16:20,044 --> 01:16:22,964
You'll never get that to stick.
One whiff of this...

1004
01:16:23,006 --> 01:16:24,966
will kill you
with the parole board.

1005
01:16:25,008 --> 01:16:28,303
Oh, you could be with us
for some time.

1006
01:16:28,346 --> 01:16:32,309
So I think
it's in everyone's interest...

1007
01:16:32,391 --> 01:16:34,811
if you lose this game.

1008
01:16:36,563 --> 01:16:39,609
I can't do that.
Well, you've done it before.

1009
01:17:02,385 --> 01:17:05,304
You had everything
they ever dreamed of...

1010
01:17:05,388 --> 01:17:08,432
and you threw it all away.

1011
01:17:36,757 --> 01:17:39,885
Meehan!
Meehan has given it away again.

1012
01:17:41,219 --> 01:17:43,806
Fuck sake, Danny.
I was open.

1013
01:17:43,889 --> 01:17:45,850
I didn't see you.

1014
01:17:51,315 --> 01:17:53,567
Looks like he's in
a fuckin' world of his own.

1015
01:17:53,651 --> 01:17:54,985
Wake up, Meehan!

1016
01:17:58,072 --> 01:18:00,659
The ball's played to the left.
Hibert picks it up...

1017
01:18:00,742 --> 01:18:03,829
and moves forward to the edge
of the 18yard box.

1018
01:18:03,913 --> 01:18:05,581
The defender cuts inside.

1019
01:18:05,664 --> 01:18:08,543
He plays it neatly to Hayter,
who knocks it for Downes.

1020
01:18:08,584 --> 01:18:10,921
Oh, no! He's been
brought down in the area.

1021
01:18:11,004 --> 01:18:13,924
Could be a penalty.
The ref's waved play on and

1022
01:18:13,966 --> 01:18:16,760
Oh, no, Bob.
What goes through Monk's head?

1023
01:18:16,844 --> 01:18:18,095
Scary thought, Bob.

1024
01:18:18,137 --> 01:18:20,599
Yeah, I'd hate to think
about what he dreams about.

1025
01:18:50,967 --> 01:18:52,802
It's getting a bit naughty
out there, Bob.

1026
01:18:52,885 --> 01:18:56,097
Positively brutal. Don't know whether
they're fighting or doing a tango.

1027
01:18:57,557 --> 01:18:59,476
No, they're definitely fighting.

1028
01:19:19,957 --> 01:19:23,336
Billy the Limpet, bless him. He's
chasing the ball like a little terrier.

1029
01:19:25,547 --> 01:19:27,257
Shame he hasn't the skill
to match his enthusiasm.

1030
01:19:27,341 --> 01:19:30,303
Shame he's fuckin' useless, Bob.
Absofuckin'lutely, Bob.

1031
01:19:42,317 --> 01:19:45,279
Ratchett's taken out Cigs.
The guards are taking no prisoners.

1032
01:19:45,361 --> 01:19:47,488
You get it, Bob?
Whatever, Bob.

1033
01:19:55,957 --> 01:19:58,710
You
Fucking watch it.

1034
01:19:58,753 --> 01:20:01,546
No, you fucking watch it,
you fat bastard.

1035
01:20:06,552 --> 01:20:08,220
That's going a bit too far,
isn't it?

1036
01:20:10,389 --> 01:20:13,185
He took a dive!
Number seven. Violent conduct.

1037
01:20:13,226 --> 01:20:16,396
Off the park.
It was a dive! Look!

1038
01:20:16,481 --> 01:20:18,900
Come on. Do one, now.
Fuck off.

1039
01:20:18,983 --> 01:20:22,237
It's a straight red.
The cons are down to ten men.

1040
01:20:22,320 --> 01:20:24,572
Well, it's an early bath for Raj...

1041
01:20:24,657 --> 01:20:27,576
which is really gonna put pressure
on the Mean Machine.

1042
01:20:27,618 --> 01:20:31,373
It's disappointing, but you can be sure
it's not going to be easy out there.

1043
01:20:31,413 --> 01:20:36,254
That's right, Bob. They're taking full
advantage of the extra man on the pitch.

1044
01:20:36,294 --> 01:20:39,674
Walker's through ball
to Mr. Gayle, who plays it.

1045
01:20:39,757 --> 01:20:43,344
And Hayter. And Monk!
Superb save, way down to his left.

1046
01:20:43,428 --> 01:20:46,556
All right! All right!
29 minutes, Bob. Still onenil.

1047
01:20:46,598 --> 01:20:50,728
And the cons are holding out.
The Monk's gone on another walkabout!

1048
01:20:50,769 --> 01:20:53,898
But this time he plays it safe
to Trojan out wide.

1049
01:21:02,032 --> 01:21:04,576
All Troj has to do is look up.
Come on. Pass it.

1050
01:21:04,660 --> 01:21:07,455
Pass it. Pass.
Pass it. Pass it.

1051
01:21:07,538 --> 01:21:09,165
Pass it.
Pass it!

1052
01:21:09,958 --> 01:21:12,294
Pass the fucking ball!

1053
01:21:25,475 --> 01:21:28,813
Yeah!
Goal!

1054
01:21:30,481 --> 01:21:32,108
Two-nil to the cons.

1055
01:21:32,191 --> 01:21:35,653
Ten men down, their liberty
taken away from them...

1056
01:21:35,738 --> 01:21:39,658
locked in a cell
for 23 hours a day...

1057
01:21:39,700 --> 01:21:41,493
and today
our boys have their day.

1058
01:21:44,831 --> 01:21:46,791
What's up with you?

1059
01:21:49,669 --> 01:21:52,340
For the last hour
of my life sentence...

1060
01:21:52,381 --> 01:21:54,175
I have been free!

1061
01:21:57,094 --> 01:22:00,766
Mean Machine! Mean Machine!
Mean Machine! Mean Machine!

1062
01:22:00,849 --> 01:22:02,893
Yes!

1063
01:22:04,604 --> 01:22:05,854
It's the guards to kick off.

1064
01:22:08,525 --> 01:22:10,985
Mr. Williams lays it back
for Mr. Hibert...

1065
01:22:11,070 --> 01:22:12,821
who whips a beautiful ball
into the box.

1066
01:22:12,905 --> 01:22:15,866
Monk's got it covered.
Safe as houses.

1067
01:22:15,908 --> 01:22:18,869
Oh, you've gotta love the Monk.
Gotta love the Monk.

1068
01:22:39,894 --> 01:22:43,481
What's Monk doing?
He's left an empty net!

1069
01:22:43,564 --> 01:22:46,401
He's lost the fuckin' ball!
He's lost the fuckin' plot.

1070
01:22:53,742 --> 01:22:56,829
Guards' goal. Twoone.

1071
01:22:56,913 --> 01:22:59,082
Yes!

1072
01:23:01,794 --> 01:23:04,839
Hey! Stop fucking about
back here!

1073
01:23:04,922 --> 01:23:07,049
Get the ball up the park!

1074
01:23:08,719 --> 01:23:11,304
All right.
My fault.

1075
01:23:13,473 --> 01:23:17,437
It's no longer just a game out there.
There's a match on now.

1076
01:23:20,565 --> 01:23:23,526
Have a word, Dan.
Fuck off, Trojan.

1077
01:23:24,987 --> 01:23:27,740
Come on, lads. Let's go.
Come on, boys.

1078
01:23:31,076 --> 01:23:32,912
The cons kick off.

1079
01:23:32,996 --> 01:23:35,957
But what is he doing?
He's given it straight away.

1080
01:23:37,918 --> 01:23:40,212
Oh! He's hit the bar!

1081
01:23:41,297 --> 01:23:43,216
You see?
There's no cohesion.

1082
01:23:43,299 --> 01:23:46,094
There's no character, eh?

1083
01:23:47,387 --> 01:23:49,515
The Mean Machine really need
their star player...

1084
01:23:49,598 --> 01:23:51,892
to pick up his game now.

1085
01:23:51,976 --> 01:23:55,730
What is Meehan doing, anyway?
It's like he's not even on the pitch.

1086
01:23:59,693 --> 01:24:01,862
What's up with you?
I never touched you.

1087
01:24:03,113 --> 01:24:06,117
Looks like Danny's injured.

1088
01:24:06,200 --> 01:24:09,120
You're cheating now, are you?
Once a loser, always a loser.

1089
01:24:10,705 --> 01:24:13,292
What happened? Where'd you get hit?
Down there.

1090
01:24:13,375 --> 01:24:16,336
Doesn't look too clever, boys.
I can't see anything.

1091
01:24:16,379 --> 01:24:18,714
Come on.
Let's get him up.

1092
01:24:18,798 --> 01:24:21,009
All right, ref.
Come on, Danny.

1093
01:24:21,051 --> 01:24:24,012
Don't put no weight on it.
Looks like Meehan is leaving the pitch.

1094
01:24:24,054 --> 01:24:25,765
Lets hope
they bring a sub on.

1095
01:24:25,847 --> 01:24:29,727
It's 11 against 9 out there.
Frenchy, I've got it.

1096
01:24:29,810 --> 01:24:32,188
Get it fixed.
Okay, Mr. Sykes. We got it.

1097
01:24:32,231 --> 01:24:34,525
Shove up and shut up.

1098
01:24:35,901 --> 01:24:38,696
The guards are really
moving the ball about nicely.

1099
01:24:38,737 --> 01:24:40,739
Oh. Neat passing.

1100
01:24:40,824 --> 01:24:44,119
But the cons are determined
not to give up.

1101
01:24:46,579 --> 01:24:49,083
There's nothing wrong
with that leg, is there?

1102
01:24:53,421 --> 01:24:55,381
Why don't people just
let me play this game?

1103
01:24:55,424 --> 01:24:57,843
Didn't think
you'd sell us out.

1104
01:24:57,926 --> 01:25:01,306
Not after the big
"It's your time" speech.

1105
01:25:08,188 --> 01:25:11,025
Is there something I should know?
He's fucked something up.

1106
01:25:14,779 --> 01:25:16,740
Could be a strain.

1107
01:25:26,208 --> 01:25:30,046
It's getting tough out there.
The guards are putting the pressure on.

1108
01:25:30,129 --> 01:25:32,090
Fuckin' hell, Massive!
Help us out!

1109
01:25:32,131 --> 01:25:34,968
We've only got nine men on!
Get a sub on!

1110
01:25:40,475 --> 01:25:42,685
Walker to Marsden.

1111
01:25:48,316 --> 01:25:50,903
Downes wide to Hibert.

1112
01:25:50,986 --> 01:25:53,281
Hibert clips it forward.

1113
01:25:54,907 --> 01:25:56,576
Walker brings it down.

1114
01:25:56,660 --> 01:25:58,578
The cons are swamped at the back.

1115
01:25:58,662 --> 01:26:01,415
Ratchett's free in the area.

1116
01:26:03,668 --> 01:26:06,046
Yes! Yes!

1117
01:26:06,128 --> 01:26:09,424
Twofuckingtwo.
Good one.

1118
01:26:09,466 --> 01:26:11,259
Good one.

1119
01:26:12,929 --> 01:26:15,473
Thanks, Danny Meehan.

1120
01:26:16,641 --> 01:26:18,643
Come on, lads.

1121
01:26:18,686 --> 01:26:22,940
Twotwo.
Right. Now a third. Get up there.

1122
01:26:23,022 --> 01:26:25,150
Ref! Sub!

1123
01:26:35,287 --> 01:26:37,832
Mass, look
It's your life.

1124
01:26:42,879 --> 01:26:45,507
Ratchett just
brought down Billy the Limpet.

1125
01:26:45,549 --> 01:26:47,634
That's like
kicking a puppy dog, Bob.

1126
01:26:53,640 --> 01:26:55,560
Give me my boot.

1127
01:26:58,355 --> 01:27:01,191
Yes!
Ref! Ref!

1128
01:27:03,903 --> 01:27:06,113
I'm coming back on.
Sit the fuck down, man.

1129
01:27:06,197 --> 01:27:08,826
Forget it, Meehan.
Who's coming on?

1130
01:27:08,908 --> 01:27:11,411
Me.
Him.

1131
01:27:11,495 --> 01:27:13,413
You're playing like crap
and you know it.

1132
01:27:13,497 --> 01:27:15,708
Will you make up your mind?
Who's in charge here?

1133
01:27:15,750 --> 01:27:17,669
I'm in charge.
I'm the manager. Danny's coming on.

1134
01:27:17,710 --> 01:27:21,048
Hold it!
Listen, I'm the owner.

1135
01:27:21,089 --> 01:27:22,298
You?
Yes.

1136
01:27:22,382 --> 01:27:23,759
The owner?
Yes.

1137
01:27:23,842 --> 01:27:26,721
Behave. Manager's decision.
You. On.

1138
01:27:30,601 --> 01:27:33,186
The great Danny Meehan
returns to the pitch.

1139
01:27:33,270 --> 01:27:35,522
Yeah.
That's all we fuckin' need.

1140
01:27:35,647 --> 01:27:38,776
If he carries on playing
like he did before he went off...

1141
01:27:38,859 --> 01:27:41,196
we may as well
all go home now, Bob.

1142
01:27:51,999 --> 01:27:54,628
Ketch knocks it
out wide to Trojan.

1143
01:27:54,670 --> 01:27:58,632
It's amazing. The guards are still
finding it hard to deal with this man.

1144
01:27:58,674 --> 01:28:01,969
I'm with you here if you want!
Yes, Troj!

1145
01:28:02,053 --> 01:28:04,597
Troj, pass it! I'm on!
Pass here!

1146
01:28:04,681 --> 01:28:06,808
Trojan plays it
into the center.

1147
01:28:07,934 --> 01:28:09,978
I'm free there.
Yeah, well...

1148
01:28:10,062 --> 01:28:11,689
I didn't fucking see you, did I?

1149
01:28:11,772 --> 01:28:13,691
Oh, really.

1150
01:28:16,235 --> 01:28:18,822
Chiv! Chiv, lay off!
Pass it!

1151
01:28:18,863 --> 01:28:20,657
Chiv, pass it! Pass

1152
01:28:35,257 --> 01:28:37,343
God, that was a meeting of minds.
Not a pretty sight.

1153
01:28:38,720 --> 01:28:41,305
It looks like Danny Meehan's
trying to redeem himself.

1154
01:28:41,389 --> 01:28:44,643
He's gonna have to do a fuck lot
of work to manage that, Bob.

1155
01:28:44,726 --> 01:28:48,355
Danny Meehan is now everywhere.
He's bobbing and weaving, Bob.

1156
01:28:51,734 --> 01:28:52,902
No way was that offside!

1157
01:29:10,088 --> 01:29:12,425
That's the way it's done, pal.

1158
01:29:12,507 --> 01:29:15,761
The ball's pushed high into the
guards' half. Cigs pulls it down.

1159
01:29:15,845 --> 01:29:18,222
Shoots.
Oh, it's a goal!

1160
01:29:18,306 --> 01:29:22,518
The Mean Machine are out
in front again! There's a flag.

1161
01:29:22,603 --> 01:29:25,981
God bless the Mean Machine.
Keep your shirt on. Something's up.

1162
01:29:26,066 --> 01:29:28,193
There's something going on, Bob.

1163
01:29:29,778 --> 01:29:32,906
The Mean Machine are celebrating.
I think it's been disallowed.

1164
01:29:32,947 --> 01:29:35,076
The ref has gone
to the linesman.

1165
01:29:37,118 --> 01:29:39,205
There's confusion on the pitch.
There certainly is, Bob.

1166
01:29:39,288 --> 01:29:42,376
They're conferring.
Oh, surely not!

1167
01:29:42,458 --> 01:29:44,503
Yeah, yeah.
If this stands...

1168
01:29:44,586 --> 01:29:47,297
it's a free kick to the guards
35 yards out from the goal.

1169
01:29:47,381 --> 01:29:50,050
Get up, you bloody tart!

1170
01:29:50,134 --> 01:29:53,096
Aah! Easy.
Okay. Let's get him off.

1171
01:29:53,179 --> 01:29:55,765
It's in a goalscoring position
if I've ever seen one, Bob.

1172
01:29:55,849 --> 01:29:59,144
We're in the dying seconds
of the game. It's twotwo.

1173
01:29:59,228 --> 01:30:02,064
Lee, get changed.
You're on, mate. Ref!

1174
01:30:02,148 --> 01:30:05,151
Mr. Ratchett, are you
all right, sir?

1175
01:30:05,235 --> 01:30:07,237
Obviously not.
All right. Take him away.

1176
01:30:08,988 --> 01:30:11,158
Are you gonna do
absolutely nothing about that?

1177
01:30:11,241 --> 01:30:14,620
It's a free kick.
Now take it.

1178
01:30:14,662 --> 01:30:16,956
How long, Ref?
Just moving into injury time.

1179
01:30:17,040 --> 01:30:19,918
This is it.
If he scores now, it's all over.

1180
01:30:21,586 --> 01:30:23,506
All right, Gaylie.
Stick it in.

1181
01:30:23,588 --> 01:30:25,800
And prison warder
Mr. Gayle will take it.

1182
01:30:27,676 --> 01:30:30,763
He curls it.
Heading to the top righthand corner!

1183
01:32:18,511 --> 01:32:20,596
Guards of Pentonville,
guards of Wandsworth

1184
01:32:20,681 --> 01:32:24,226
Walton nick in Liverpool
Policemen of Britain

1185
01:32:24,309 --> 01:32:27,354
Traffic wardens
Parole officers, wheelclampers...

1186
01:32:27,439 --> 01:32:30,525
your boys have taken
a hell of a beating today!

1187
01:32:30,608 --> 01:32:32,777
A hell of a beating!

1188
01:33:29,258 --> 01:33:31,887
Mean Machine!
Mean Machine!

1189
01:33:31,969 --> 01:33:35,391
Mean Machine! Mean Machine!
Mean Machine! Mean Machine!

1190
01:33:57,791 --> 01:34:01,129
Burning me head out!
Burning me head out!

1191
01:34:01,212 --> 01:34:03,296
All down, Danny.
All down there.

1192
01:34:03,381 --> 01:34:06,759
Danny, you're all right.
Take that.

1193
01:34:06,844 --> 01:34:09,805
Told you I wouldn't let you down.
Well done, Bill.

1194
01:34:14,226 --> 01:34:18,815
Ruin my life, I'm gonna
fucking ruin your life.

1195
01:34:18,898 --> 01:34:23,571
No. You're not stitching
anyone up. Not on my watch.

1196
01:34:23,612 --> 01:34:27,825
What are you gonna do about it?
Your job, your pension

1197
01:34:27,909 --> 01:34:29,578
My ass.

1198
01:34:31,496 --> 01:34:33,248
Good game.

1199
01:34:36,461 --> 01:34:38,463
Jesus! What was that?

1200
01:34:41,591 --> 01:34:45,054
Looks like your Saab. And what
he said goes for me and all.

1201
01:34:45,136 --> 01:34:47,473
And Barry the Bookie too.

1202
01:34:51,352 --> 01:34:53,020
Nice one, Danny.

1203
01:34:58,527 --> 01:35:02,073
I want him in solitary...

1204
01:35:02,157 --> 01:35:05,201
and I'm the governor
and that's an order.

1205
01:35:06,327 --> 01:35:08,372
Okay?
Shut up.

1206
01:35:12,835 --> 01:35:15,421
Stick that
in your trophy cabinet.