Captions by VITAC...
www.vitac.com
CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY
CARTOON NETWORK
AND THE CROWD GOES WILD AS
WALLABEE BEETLES, WORLD
"CHAMPEEN" SOCCER PLAYER, HAS
THE BALL.
HE DRIVES LEFT, HE DODGES RIGHT,
HE SHOOTS...
HE... SCORES?
WALLABEE BEETLES!
HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU
NOT TO PLAY BALL IN THE HOUSE,
EH?!
YEAH!
FLY LIKE AN EAGLE, MAN!
WHOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!
WALLABEE!
AAH! OHH!
WELL, YOU TOLD ME NOT TO PLAY
BALL IN THE HOUSE.
YEAH! NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH!
WHOA!
WALL-A-BEE!!
[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
[ TIRES SCREECH ]
[ CHATTERS ]
THAT'S IT!
THIS IS MY LAST PRICELESS VASE,
AND I PREFER IT IN ONE PIECE,
YOUNG MAN!
NOW, I'M GOING OUT TO BUY JOEY
MORE KANGAROO MILK.
BUT SO HELP ME, IF THIS VASE IS
BROKEN WHEN I RETURN, I WILL
SEND YOU TO...
MILITARY SCHOOL?
WHAT?!
BALLROOM-DANCING SCHOOL!
[ GULPS ]
[ HUMMING ]
[ Singsong voice ] REMEMBER...
BE GOOD, HONEY.
OH, MAN!
WHAT CAN I DO THAT'S FUN AND
WON'T "SHATTIFY" THAT STUPID
VASE?
AND THE INDOOR MOTOCROSS TURBO
CHAMPIONSHIPS ARE ABOUT TO
BEGIN!
READY... GET SET... GO!
WHOA!
[ IMITATING MOTOR ]
WHOA! WHOA! WHOA!
WH-O-O-O-O-O-OA!
UGH!
OH, CRUD! THE VASE!
N-O-O-O-O-O-O-O!
PHEW!
IT'S A GOOD THING MOM'S VASE WAS
GONE OR...
HUH?
HEY! GIMME BACK THAT VASE!
COME BACK HERE!
[ PANTING ]
WHAT?
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
HEY, KID! YOU CAN'T COME IN
- HERE WITHOUT A... - [ CROWD CHEERS ]
WOW!
OH, MY.
HE SMASHED THE PORCELAIN OFF OF
THAT ONE, DID HE NOT?
HE SURE DID, NICK.
AND IT'S A PERFECT DAY FOR
VASEBALL, WOULDN'T YOU SAY?
I CANNOT ARGUE WITH THAT,
CHIP... ESPECIALLY WITH THE SUN
BREAKING THROUGH THE CLOUDS.
AND THAT'S NOT THE ONLY THING
BREAKING.
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
CHIP, YOU ARE "CRACKING" ME
UP!
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
AND NEXT UP FOR THE
BOSTON GLASS SOX IS
ORRIN "KRASH" KAUNFER.
HOLY CROW, NICK.
KRASH IS HAVING A FANTASTIC
SEASON.
INDEED HE IS, CHIP.
HE'S BROKEN EVERY RECORD OUT
THERE INTO A MILLION PIECES.
AND HERE'S THE PITCH.
WHOA!
HE GOT A PIECE OF THAT ONE!
FO-O-O-O-O-UL CUP!
YAY!
LITTLE GLUE, AND THAT'LL BE A
FINE SOUVENIR FROM TODAY'S
ACTION.
THIS IS THE COOLEST SPORT I
HAVE EVER SEEN!
I MUST... PLAY... NOW!
WELL, LOOK WHO HAS JUST
ARRIVED.
WE ARE PRIVILEGED TO HAVE THE
COMMISSIONER OF VASEBALL HERE
WITH US TODAY.
WELCOME, COMMISSIONER ERNEST.
ALWAYS A PLEASURE, BOYS.
SO, COMMISH, DID YOU EXPECT
THIS MANY KIDS TO SHOW UP TODAY?
OF COURSE!
WHAT KID DOESN'T LIKE TO BREAK
STUFF INTO A KAJILLION PIECES?
SEE?
[ LAUGHTER ]
AW.
AND NEXT UP WE HAVE...
UM... I DON'T SEEM TO HAVE A NAME
OR STAT ON THIS COMPETITOR.
THEN LET'S JUST CALL HIM BY
THE NUMBER ON HIS UNIFORM...
NUMBER 4.
AND HERE'S THE WINDUP.
WOW. WHAT A BEAUTIFUL
PORCELAIN PUPPY.
I HOPE IT GETS SMASHED REAL
GOOD.
OH! AND NUMBER 4 NAILS IT!
HOLY GRANOLA!
THE PRETTY PORCELAIN PUPPY IS
STILL IN ONE PIECE!
AWWWWW.
BUT WHAT'S THIS?
WELL!
AT LEAST HE BROKE SOMETHING!
INDEED, CHIP.
THIS PLAYER DOES SHOW PROMISE.
COME ON.
MY MOM THROWS HARDER THAN YOU!
GIMME ONE RIGHT OVER THE PLATE!
MOM'S VASE!
- IF I BREAK THAT, MOM WILL KILL - ME!
PUT IT RIGHT IN THERE!
THIS KID COULDN'T BREAK A SWEAT!
HOW'D YOU LIKE A BROKEN...
BREAK IT UP!
PLAY VASEBALL!
EMOTIONS ARE RUNNING HIGH
DOWN THERE, NICK, BUT NUMBER 4
IS SETTLING IN TO THE BOX.
WHAT THE...?
HEY! HE'S SUPPOSED TO SMASH
THE VASE FIRST!
NUMBER 4 ROUNDS FIRST BASE,
SECOND BASE, THIRD BASE, FOURTH,
FIFTH, SIXTH, SEVENTH!
UH, NICK?
THERE'S ONLY FOUR BASES.
HE JUST MIGHT GO ALL THE WAY!
HEY, WHERE'S HE GOING?
GET HIM!
WHOA!
HEY!
YOU BREAK IT, YOU BUY IT, KID!
[ PANTING ]
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
WHOA!
[ INDISTINCT SCREAMING ]
[ GLASS BREAKS ]
PHEW!
HEY! SAVE THE BREAKING STUFF
FOR THE FIELD, YOU GUYS!
- IT'S ALL GOING ACCORDING TO - PLAN.
AFTER EVERY KID GETS GROUNDED
FOR BREAKING THEIR PARENTS'
STUFF THEY BROUGHT HERE, THAT'LL
LEAVE NO ONE TO TATTLE ON US
WHEN WE BULLIES TOILET-PAPER AND
EGG EVERY HOUSE IN THE
NEIGHBORHOOD!
[ LAUGHTER ]
AT 5:00 SHARP, THE CALL GOES
OUT.
HELLO.
THIS IS AN ANONYMOUS MESSAGE
FROM ERNEST.
PERHAPS YOU THINK THAT YOUR...
INSERT BREAKABLE OBJECT HERE.
IS MISSING.
BUT THE TRUTH IS...
INSERT NAME OF KID HERE.
HAS TAKEN IT TO A VASEBALL
GAME TO BE SMASHED INTO
ELEVENTY BILLION PIECES.
THANK YOU.
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ CRASH ]
HUH?
UH...
DOES THAT COUNT AS A HOME RUN?
WALLABEE BEETLES.
I'VE BEEN HOPING TO RUN INTO YOU
EVER SINCE YOU RUINED MY
BULLY-FIGHT OPERATION.
GET HIM, GUYS!
HYAH!
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
WHOA!
WHERE DID HE GO?
HEY! THERE HE IS!
GET HIM!
EEP!
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
[ BELL DINGS ]
WHOA!
LOOK AT ALL THIS STUFF!
[ BELL DINGS ]
GAME OVER, SQUIRT!
I'M GONNA SMASH YOU INTO A
KAJILLION LITTLE PIECES!
NOT BEFORE I...
NOT BEFORE I SMASH YOUR PLANS TO
GET EVERYONE IN TROUBLE!
[ BELL DINGS ]
SO, HERE IT IS, FAITHFUL
VIEWERS... THE MOMENT WE'VE ALL
BEEN WAITING FOR.
THE FINAL SHOWDOWN BETWEEN
NUMBER 4 AND THE COMMISSIONER OF
VASEBALL HIMSELF.
[ CROWD CHEERS ]
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THE POWER
IN THOSE SCRAWNY ARMS.
SIMPLY AMAZING!
UH-OH!
HYAH!
WHA...
OHH!
I THINK THAT'S, LIKE, 87,005
YEARS OF BAD LUCK.
YOU...
ARRRRRRRRRRGH!
IT LOOKS LIKE NUMBER 4 HAS
SWITCHED TO OFFENSE NOW.
HYAH!
YARGH!
WHY YOU RUNNIN', KID?
I JUST WANT TO GIVE YA YOUR
BIG "BREAK"!
RARRRRRRGH!
WHOA!
IT'S THE BOTTOM OF THE NINTH,
KID.
AND I'M SWINGING FOR THE FENCES!
ARRRRRRGH!
HYAH!
MAZEL TOV!
[ BOTH SLURPING ]
HYAH!
ARGH!
HYAH!
WHOA, OHHHH!
HOLY CROW, FOLKS.
WE ARE WITNESSING ONE OF THE
GREATEST SMASHUPS IN MODERN
VASEBALL.
THIS IS TRULY FANTASTIC,
SPECTACULAR.
HYAH!
ARGH!
COME ON!
IS THAT ALL YOU'VE...
WHOA!
AND DOWN GOES NUMBER 4!
IT LOOKS LIKE HE'S SMASHED
HIS LAST COLLECTIBLE STATUE!
I DON'T THINK I CAN WATCH.
BUT I WILL!
BATTER UP, TWERP!
HYAH!
HEY! WHAT THE...
GET THIS THING OFF OF...
OOF!
WELL, THAT'S NOT A GOOD SOUND.
ARRRRRRGH!
[ PANTING ]
AAAAAAAAHH!
AND THAT'S IT, SPORTS FANS.
WE HAVE A WINNER!
NUMBER 4 HAS DONE IT!
MR. VASEBALL.
WHAT DOES VICTORY FEEL LIKE?
FLUFFY, LIKE A KITTEN?
WELL, I HAVEN'T WON YET.
I STILL GOTTA STOP ERNEST'S
PHONE MESSAGE FROM...
HELLO.
THIS IS AN ANONYMOUS MESSAGE
FROM ERNEST.
PERHAPS YOU THINK...
WELL, FOLKS, IT HAS BEEN AN
EXCITING DAY OF VASEBALL.
SURE, EVERY KID IN TOWN HAS BEEN
GROUNDED... I, MYSELF, INCLUDED.
ALL EXCEPT WALLABEE BEETLES.
SOME CALL HIM A LEGEND...
OTHERS, A HERO.
STILL OTHERS CALL HIM "THAT
STUPID KID WHO BROKE EVERYTHING
AND GOT US ALL IN TROUBLE."
WELL, WHATEVER YOU CALL HIM, HE
HAS LEFT HIS MARK ON THIS
GLORIOUS GAME AND WILL BE
FOREVER ENSHRINED IN THE HEARTS
OF ALL KIDS WHO LOVE TO SMASH
THINGS.
[ GLASS BREAKS ]
WALLABEE!
BUT, MOM!
HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS GUY ISN'T
UP TO ANY ANTI-KID ACTIVITY?
HAVE YOU DONE BACKGROUND CHECKS,
HAD HIS OFFICE BUGGED, OR, AT
THE VERY LEAST, BROKEN INTO HIS
HOUSE WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING AND
GIVEN HIM A THOROUGH BRAIN SCAN?
NO, NIGEL DEAR, I HAVEN'T,
BECAUSE THE LAST DOCTOR YOU DID
ALL THAT TO HAS A COURT ORDER
SAYING YOU CAN'T BE WITHIN THREE
MILES OF HIM!
AND I WOULD PREFER IF YOU WOULD
JUST LET THIS DOCTOR GIVE YOU
YOUR MOOSE BUMPS SHOT WITHOUT
ALL YOUR USUAL RIGAMAROLE.
BUT, M-O-OM!
SHUSH!
GOOD MORNING.
MY SON NIGEL UNO IS HERE FOR HIS
3:00 APPOINTMENT.
YES, YES.
NIGEL... UM... UNO.
WHAT A CUTE LITTLE... UH...
BALD BOY.
WELL, IF YOU'LL JUST CHANGE INTO
THIS, THE DOCTOR IS WAITING FOR
YOU IN THE EXAMINATION ROOM
RIGHT DOWN THE HALL.
I'LL BET HE IS.
- OH, JUST GET ON WITH IT, - NIGEL.
I'LL WAIT FOR YOU OUT HERE.
BUT, M-O-O-O-O-O-OM!
HELLO?
OH. [ CHUCKLES ]
WRONG ROOM. SORRY.
OH, I SAY. MR. UNO.
COME IN. COME IN, OLD BOY.
YES, VERY GOOD.
DO HAVE A SEAT AND HELP ME
FINISH OFF THESE SPLENDID
COOKIES, WOULD YOU?
WHO... W-WHO ARE YOU?
OH, OF COURSE.
HOW RUDE OF ME.
[ LAUGHS, CLEARS THROAT ]
DR. PHINEAS B. SHARP IS THE
NAME.
PLEASE, DEAR BOY, SIT DOWN.
I TOOK THE LIBERTY OF ORDERING
YOU A GRAPE SODA, BUT I CAN HAVE
THE NURSE BRING YOU A DIFFERENT
FLAVOR, SHOULD YOU LIKE.
NO.
UH... GRAPE'S FINE.
- [ SLURPING ] - RIGHT.
LET'S CUT TO THE CHASE, SHALL
WE, NIGEL?
MOOSE BUMPS ARE A HORRIBLE
AFFLICTION, AND IT'S MY JOB AS A
DOCTOR TO PREVENT THEM.
BUT NOBODY LIKES GETTING THEIR
SHOTS, YES?
AND JUST BETWEEN YOU AND ME, I
NEVER LIKED GETTING MY SHOTS
EITHER WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE.
REALLY?
OF COURSE NOT!
YES, I RAN AWAY AT THE VERY
THOUGHT OF THEM, YOU SEE.
SO, THE VERY LEAST I CAN DO IS
TO LET YOU DO THE SAME, YES?
[ GULPS ] HUH?
OH, YOU HEARD ME.
TAKE A FEW OF THESE WONDERFUL
COOKIES WITH YOU, IF YOU LIKE,
AS WELL.
REALLY?
YOU'RE LETTING ME GO?
FREE AS A BIRD, OLD CHAP.
WOW! YOU'RE THE BEST DOCTOR
I'VE EVER BEEN TO!
WHY, THANK YOU, OLD BOY.
BUT, THEN AGAIN...
I NEVER SAID I WASN'T GOING TO
CHASE YOU.
[ GASPS ]
YOU SEE, MR. UNO, I FIND IT
RATHER UNSPORTING TO JUST HOLD
CHILDREN DOWN AND GIVE THEM
THEIR MOOSE BUMPS SHOTS, SO I
LIKE TO GIVE THEM A SPORTING
CHANCE.
- [ LAUGHS EVILLY ] - ESCAPE ME AND YOU ESCAPE GETTING
YOUR SHOTS.
BUT, OF COURSE, WE KNOW
THERE'S NOT MUCH CHANCE OF THAT
HAPPENING, NOW, IS THERE?
YOU'RE... YOU'RE MAD!
OH, COME NOW, MR. UNO.
YOU'VE ONLY GOT 10 SECONDS
BEFORE I START AFTER YOU, AND
- YOU'RE WASTING THEM CALLING ME - NAMES?
10 SECONDS?!
ACTUALLY, IT'S ONLY ABOUT
FIVE NOW.
[ PANTING ]
[ ANIMALS CHATTERING,
[ SCREECHING ]
W-W-WHERE AM I?
WHY, YOU'RE IN MY OFFICE, OLD
BOY.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
OOH, I SAY.
THIS UNO BOY MIGHT ACTUALLY BE A
CHALLENGE.
NURSE JUMBO, COULD YOU COME
HERE, PLEASE?
OHH! THRILLING!
[ LOUD STOMPING ]
GOOD HEAVENS, NURSE JUMBO.
- WHAT THE DEVIL HAVE YOU BEEN - EATING?
JUST LOOK AT YOU!
VERY WELL, THEN.
WE'LL WORK OFF SOME OF THOSE
CRUMPETS, EH?
[ PANTING ]
WHOA!
[ PANTING ]
WH-O-O-O-OA!
OHH!
[ GRUNTING ]
[ SIGHS ]
I'VE GOT NO WEAPONS, NO WAY TO
CONTACT THE OTHER KIDS NEXT
DOOR, AND NO PANTS.
MM-MMM!
NOTHING NIGEL UNO HASN'T BEEN
THROUGH BEFORE!
[ PANTING ]
WELL, NURSE JUMBO, LET'S JUST
SEE WHAT WE'VE CAUGHT HERE,
SHALL WE?
HMM. CLEVER BOY.
WHAT'S THIS?
BUT NOT CLEVER ENOUGH!
QUICK, NURSE JUMBO... AFTER HIM!
[ PANTING ]
[ TRUMPETS ]
FASTER, NURSE JUMBO!
WE'RE RIGHT ON HIS TAIL!
GAME OVER, MR. UNO.
THOUGH, THIS CLEARING DOES LOOK
FAMILIA-A-A-A-R!
[ POINK! ]
LOOKS LIKE THEY GOT MY
"POINT."
[ LAUGHS ]
OHH!
LOOKS LIKE I'VE UNDERESTIMATED
THIS BOY, WHAT?
WELL, NO MATTER.
[ GRUNTS ]
THIS IS GETTING JOLLY FUN.
[ TRUMPET BLARES ]
TALLYHO!
[ PANTING ]
WAAAH! WAH-HAH-HAH!
WAAAH!
OOF!
THIS HAS BEEN GOOD FUN,
MR. UNO, BUT I'M AFRAID YOU'RE
SURROUNDED.
[ PANTING ]
[ TRUMPETS ]
BOTTOMS UP, OLD BOY!
[ NEEDLES WHISTLING ]
[ PANTING ]
[ GRUNTING ]
WAAAAAH!
WH-O-O-O-OA!
[ PANTING ]
OHH!
DON'T JUST SIT THERE,
NURSE JUMBO... GIVE ME THE HEAVY
ARTILLERY.
TRY RUNNING FROM THIS, MY GOOD
MAN.
HEAT SOURCE LOCATED.
TARGET LOCKED.
[ PANTING ]
WHOA!
YAAAH!
WH-O-O-OA!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
HEAT SOURCE LOST.
I SAY, WE SHOULD HAVE HEARD A
JOLLY GOOD SCREAM OF INOCULATION
BY NOW, DON'T YOU THINK?
HEAT SOURCE LOCATED.
TARGET LOCKED.
OH, BISCUITS, NURSE JUMBO.
I DON'T SEE HIM ANYWHERE.
[ GASPS ]
GREAT BALLS OF COTTON!
[ POINK! ]
[ SCREAMING ]
[ GASPS ]
[ SIGHS ]
WHOA!
GRR!
NO ONE ESCAPES
DR. PHINEAS B. SHARP, MR. UNO.
AFTER HIM, NURSE JUMBO!
[ SQUEAKING ]
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU QUIT,
YOU PREPOSTEROUS PACHYDERM?!
[ SQUEAKING ]
OH, SO YOU GOT HIT BY A FEW
STRAY SHOTS.
WELL, BOO-HOO.
IT'S NOT LIKE ELEPHANTS CAN GET
MOOSE BUMPS ANYWAY.
[ SQUEAKING ]
WELL, FINE.
YOU BE THAT WAY, THEN.
RRRRR...
ARRRRGH!
I'LL GO AND GIVE NIGEL UNO HIS
MOOSE BUMPS SHOTS MYSELF.
[ GRUMBLING ]
DREADFUL INDEED.
[ WHIMPERING ]
CAN'T... KEEP THIS UP... MUCH
LONGER.
AAAAAH!
I DO HAVE OTHER APPOINTMENTS
TODAY, MR. UNO, SO LET'S GET
THIS OVER WITH, SHALL WE?
NO!
GET AWAY!
[ PANTING ]
THERE'S NOWHERE TO RUN,
NIGEL, SO WHY DON'T YOU TAKE
YOUR SHOTS LIKE A MAN.
NO!
YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!
WHOA!
[ WHISTLE BLOWS ]
[ MOOSE CALLS ]
Y-YOU'RE NOT PREVENTING...
AAAAAAH!
OOOOOOH!
SO, YOU'VE FIGURED IT OUT,
HAVE YOU, OLD BOY?
I'M NOT PREVENTING MOOSE BUMPS.
I'M CAUS THEM!
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
AND BY TURNING YOU MISERABLE
CHILDREN INTO MOOSES, I'LL HAVE
ALL THE ANTLERS I NEED TO SAW
OFF, GRIND UP, AND MAKE INTO
"CHESTER'S MARVELOUS MOOSICLES,"
AN ICE-CREAM TREAT THAT'LL
MAKE ME AN ELEVENTY
BIMILLIONAIRE!
[ LAUGHS ]
YOU... YOU'RE INSANE!
I'LL STOP YOU IF IT'S THE LAST
THING... I... DO!
AH, BUT THIS IS THE LAST
THING YOU'LL DO.
CAN YOU FEEL IT?
IT'S ALREADY HAPPENING!
HUH?
[ SCREAMING ]
[ Deep voice ] WHAT HAVE YOU
DONE TO ME?
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
WHAT?
THIS CAN'T...
THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!
[ LAUGHING ]
WHOA!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
AND THAT'S WHAT'S GOING TO
HAPPEN IF YOU MAKE ME GET MY
MOOSE BUMPS SHOTS!
IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT, MOM?
IS IT? HUH?
OH, DON'T BE RIDICULOUS,
NIGEL.
I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU GET THESE
PREPOSTEROUS IDEAS IN YOUR HEAD.
GOOD MORNING.
MY SON NIGEL UNO IS HERE FOR HIS
3:00 APPOINTMENT.
YES, YES.
NIGEL UNO!
♪ MOOSICLES
♪ MOO-MOO-MARVELOUS MOOSICLES
♪ FIRST WE TAKE SOME ANTLERS
AND GRIND THEM UP ♪
♪ THEN WE ADD SOME ICE CREAM
♪ GLOPPITY GLOP
♪ FREEZE 'EM IN THE FREEZER
AT 100 BELOW ♪
♪ TAKE 'EM OUT, YOU GOTTA
- SHOUT ♪ - ♪ OH, WHAT DO YA KNOW
♪ THEY'RE MOOSICLES
♪ MOOSICLES
♪ MOO-MOO-MARVELOUS MOOSICLES
♪ THE ONLY ICE-CREAM TREAT
WITH THE FUR THAT TICKLES ♪
♪ THEY'RE CHESTER'S MARVELOUS
MOOSICLES ♪