1 00:01:19,879 --> 00:01:22,250 [woman yells] 2 00:01:22,283 --> 00:01:24,352 [struggling grunts] 3 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:37,564 [glass shatters] 4 00:02:20,508 --> 00:02:22,776 (Randy Newman) * It's a jungle out there 5 00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:27,580 * Disorder and confusion everywhere * 6 00:02:27,615 --> 00:02:30,884 * No one seems to care-- well, I do * 7 00:02:30,918 --> 00:02:34,187 * Hey, who's in charge here? 8 00:02:34,222 --> 00:02:37,457 * It's a jungle out there 9 00:02:37,490 --> 00:02:40,527 * Poison in the very air we breathe * 10 00:02:40,561 --> 00:02:43,430 * You know what's in the water that you drink? * 11 00:02:43,463 --> 00:02:47,567 * Well, I do, and it's amazing * 12 00:02:47,600 --> 00:02:50,937 * People think I'm crazy 'cause I worry all the time * 13 00:02:50,971 --> 00:02:54,408 * If you paid attention, you'd be worried too * 14 00:02:54,442 --> 00:02:58,646 * You'd better pay attention or this world we love so much * 15 00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:02,415 * Might just kill you 16 00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:04,784 * I could be wrong now 17 00:03:04,818 --> 00:03:06,620 * but I don't think so 18 00:03:06,653 --> 00:03:09,223 * 'Cause it's a jungle out there * 19 00:03:09,257 --> 00:03:14,495 * It's a jungle out there * 20 00:03:16,463 --> 00:03:20,668 It's been three months. How are you holding up? 21 00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:22,969 Well, I've made a decision. 22 00:03:23,002 --> 00:03:24,372 Good. 23 00:03:24,405 --> 00:03:27,540 When she comes back, I'm not gonna pay her 24 00:03:27,574 --> 00:03:29,342 for the weeks she missed. 25 00:03:29,377 --> 00:03:30,677 I have to draw the line. 26 00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:32,545 I'm docking her pay. 27 00:03:32,579 --> 00:03:37,016 Adrian...Sharona is not coming back. 28 00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,885 Oh, she'll be back. 29 00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:39,953 Believe me. 30 00:03:39,986 --> 00:03:43,490 I--I think I know her a lot better than you do. 31 00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:49,896 Didn't she sell her house? 32 00:03:49,930 --> 00:03:51,264 Yes. 33 00:03:51,299 --> 00:03:53,834 And she moved back to New Jersey. 34 00:03:53,866 --> 00:03:56,469 Yes. 35 00:03:56,503 --> 00:04:00,240 And she remarried her ex-husband. 36 00:04:04,377 --> 00:04:06,580 I'm not sure I like where you're going here. 37 00:04:06,614 --> 00:04:09,449 Adrian, Sharona is moving on with her life, 38 00:04:09,483 --> 00:04:11,718 and if you loved her, you'd be happy for her. 39 00:04:15,989 --> 00:04:18,759 She wasn't just my assistant. 40 00:04:18,792 --> 00:04:20,060 I know. 41 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,060 When she found me, 42 00:04:21,093 --> 00:04:22,896 I was drowning. 43 00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:23,896 She saved my life. 44 00:04:23,930 --> 00:04:25,598 I know. 45 00:04:25,632 --> 00:04:28,000 I know--I was there. 46 00:04:28,035 --> 00:04:29,870 Well, you're a doctor. 47 00:04:29,903 --> 00:04:33,574 Can't you make her come back? 48 00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:35,475 What would you like me to do? 49 00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:38,446 Fly back to New Jersey and drug her, 50 00:04:38,478 --> 00:04:40,713 bring her back here? 51 00:04:43,651 --> 00:04:45,718 No. 52 00:04:45,752 --> 00:04:48,389 But thank you. 53 00:04:50,490 --> 00:04:52,826 She's pretty smart. She'd probably escape. 54 00:04:52,860 --> 00:04:56,797 Adrian, you were lucky to know her. 55 00:04:56,829 --> 00:04:58,566 And I know you'll always be grateful, 56 00:04:58,598 --> 00:05:00,668 but it's time for you to move on. 57 00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:03,803 You've gotta start looking for your new assistant. 58 00:05:03,836 --> 00:05:05,406 Impossible. 59 00:05:05,439 --> 00:05:07,641 Yeah, well, that's what you said before you found Sharona. 60 00:05:07,675 --> 00:05:09,509 But, Adrian, you've got to start looking. 61 00:05:09,543 --> 00:05:11,944 Your new assistant is out there somewhere. 62 00:05:16,684 --> 00:05:18,886 God help her. 63 00:05:18,918 --> 00:05:20,821 I've been a Registered Nurse for 14 years. 64 00:05:20,853 --> 00:05:22,656 These are my references. 65 00:05:26,093 --> 00:05:29,430 Your staple's...crooked. 66 00:05:29,463 --> 00:05:31,399 I've been voted California Nurse of the Year 67 00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:32,365 three years in a row. 68 00:05:32,399 --> 00:05:35,569 Mm-hmm, yeah. What's up with this staple? 69 00:05:35,603 --> 00:05:36,937 You're looking for someone to start right away? 70 00:05:36,970 --> 00:05:38,038 That's right. 71 00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:39,740 What would my hours be? 72 00:05:39,773 --> 00:05:42,009 9:00 A.M... 73 00:05:42,042 --> 00:05:43,711 Until? 74 00:05:43,744 --> 00:05:45,045 Until one-- 75 00:05:45,077 --> 00:05:46,480 1:00 PM? 76 00:05:46,514 --> 00:05:48,816 Until one of us dies. 77 00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:51,084 [police radio chatter] 78 00:05:54,622 --> 00:05:55,855 So who was he? 79 00:05:55,889 --> 00:05:57,490 So far he's John Doe. 80 00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:58,692 No wallet, no ID. 81 00:05:58,725 --> 00:06:01,093 We're runnin' the prints now. 82 00:06:01,127 --> 00:06:03,997 Miss Teeger, I'd like to go through the story. 83 00:06:04,031 --> 00:06:07,735 Um, you heard a noise, you came to check it out. 84 00:06:07,767 --> 00:06:09,870 He comes, he grabs you from behind. 85 00:06:09,903 --> 00:06:11,471 Yeah. You struggle. 86 00:06:11,504 --> 00:06:13,105 Now, there were some scissors on that table. 87 00:06:13,139 --> 00:06:14,574 What were they doing there? 88 00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:17,009 Julie, my daughter, 89 00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,778 was working on a school project. 90 00:06:18,812 --> 00:06:19,680 Where's the girl? 91 00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:21,882 She's with a neighbor. Didn't see anything. 92 00:06:21,915 --> 00:06:23,417 Good. 93 00:06:23,451 --> 00:06:25,819 So you grabbed the scissors and you stabbed him? 94 00:06:25,853 --> 00:06:27,721 I wasn't trying to kill him. 95 00:06:27,754 --> 00:06:28,988 Maybe I was. 96 00:06:29,021 --> 00:06:30,023 I--I don't know. 97 00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:30,957 Natalie. 98 00:06:30,990 --> 00:06:33,427 You had every right to defend yourself. 99 00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:36,529 Where's your husband? 100 00:06:36,564 --> 00:06:38,632 Uh, he died. 101 00:06:38,665 --> 00:06:40,033 Uh, six years ago. 102 00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,134 He's a, uh-- 103 00:06:41,168 --> 00:06:44,137 was a Navy pilot. 104 00:06:44,170 --> 00:06:45,505 I'm sorry. 105 00:06:45,538 --> 00:06:46,807 Captain, why are they doing this? 106 00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:48,742 What do they want from me? Who's "they"? 107 00:06:48,776 --> 00:06:50,076 There was, uh... 108 00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:52,545 another intruder two days ago. 109 00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:53,913 On Tuesday, a man came to my house. 110 00:06:53,947 --> 00:06:55,882 He said he was here to check my water meter. 111 00:06:55,915 --> 00:06:56,917 But he didn't go downstairs. 112 00:06:56,949 --> 00:06:59,786 I--I caught him over there just looking around. 113 00:06:59,819 --> 00:07:01,889 But when he saw me, he ran out the back door. 114 00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:04,057 We called Water and Power, but there's no record. 115 00:07:04,091 --> 00:07:05,925 And this was a different guy? 116 00:07:05,959 --> 00:07:07,093 Yeah. 117 00:07:07,127 --> 00:07:08,762 You're sure about that? Yeah. 118 00:07:08,795 --> 00:07:10,230 Sir. 119 00:07:10,262 --> 00:07:12,031 There's gotta be a connection here. 120 00:07:12,064 --> 00:07:14,134 Do you know the odds against two different men 121 00:07:14,166 --> 00:07:16,937 breaking into the same house in the same week? 122 00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:19,238 No, I don't. Do you? 123 00:07:19,271 --> 00:07:21,207 No. 124 00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:24,512 Is there anything of value in your house? 125 00:07:24,545 --> 00:07:25,778 Yeah. My daughter. 126 00:07:25,812 --> 00:07:29,750 Of course. I mean cash or jewelry? 127 00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:31,718 Medicine? No. 128 00:07:31,752 --> 00:07:33,754 Drugs? No. 129 00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:35,254 And you've never seen these men before? 130 00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:37,156 Either this guy or the meter guy? 131 00:07:37,189 --> 00:07:38,959 No. 132 00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:41,595 Heh. 133 00:07:41,629 --> 00:07:46,500 Miss Teeger, there's a person we sometimes bring in. 134 00:07:46,533 --> 00:07:48,201 He's a former detective. 135 00:07:48,235 --> 00:07:51,771 He sort of specializes in cases like this. 136 00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,706 Great, let's call him. 137 00:07:53,740 --> 00:07:55,242 It's not that easy. 138 00:07:55,274 --> 00:07:58,812 You see, he's, uh, he's taking some time off. 139 00:07:58,846 --> 00:08:00,279 He's sort of working through 140 00:08:00,312 --> 00:08:02,550 one or two personal issues right now. 141 00:08:02,583 --> 00:08:06,086 But I think if you were to talk to him and ask him yourself, 142 00:08:06,119 --> 00:08:08,588 he might change his mind. 143 00:08:08,622 --> 00:08:09,956 Mr. Monk, I'm a little confused. 144 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:11,290 Me too! 145 00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:12,725 See, I'm a Registered Nurse. 146 00:08:12,759 --> 00:08:15,728 And physically, you seem to be fine. 147 00:08:15,762 --> 00:08:17,564 Are you looking for a housekeeper? 148 00:08:17,598 --> 00:08:19,266 No--What? No, no. 149 00:08:19,298 --> 00:08:20,834 I-I-I can clean the house. 150 00:08:20,867 --> 00:08:21,935 Don't worry about that. 151 00:08:21,968 --> 00:08:23,803 That's covered. 152 00:08:23,836 --> 00:08:25,738 She didn't give me any notice. 153 00:08:25,773 --> 00:08:30,110 I guess she was worried that I'd have a nervous breakdown or--Ha. 154 00:08:30,143 --> 00:08:34,147 But--But her son, Benjy, he--he gave me this letter. 155 00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:35,783 He left me this. 156 00:08:35,816 --> 00:08:36,950 It's in a baggie. 157 00:08:36,984 --> 00:08:38,018 It's an evidence bag. 158 00:08:38,051 --> 00:08:39,586 Read the P.S. 159 00:08:39,620 --> 00:08:40,854 Did you read the P.S.? 160 00:08:40,888 --> 00:08:41,721 Yeah, it's heartbreaking. 161 00:08:41,754 --> 00:08:43,956 Uh, Mr. Monk, can I be honest with you? 162 00:08:43,990 --> 00:08:45,225 I wish you wouldn't. 163 00:08:45,258 --> 00:08:47,226 I've had tons of patients like you. 164 00:08:47,259 --> 00:08:49,697 There is nothing wrong with you. It's all up here. 165 00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:50,931 It's psychological. 166 00:08:50,963 --> 00:08:52,065 Right, right. 167 00:08:52,099 --> 00:08:53,801 What you really need is a wife. 168 00:08:53,834 --> 00:08:55,335 Oh, whoa. Uh, we just met. 169 00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:56,870 Okay? I don't even know you. 170 00:08:56,903 --> 00:08:58,270 It's not me. I'm not proposing to you. 171 00:08:58,304 --> 00:08:59,306 It's a statement of fact. 172 00:08:59,338 --> 00:09:01,575 Excuse me-- You gotta stop whining, you know? 173 00:09:01,609 --> 00:09:02,775 Th-There's no smoking. 174 00:09:02,809 --> 00:09:04,244 Sharona moved away, wah, wah, wah. 175 00:09:04,277 --> 00:09:06,714 You know what? You have got to get out of the house. 176 00:09:06,746 --> 00:09:07,914 You gotta do something. 177 00:09:07,947 --> 00:09:09,883 Go bowling. You know, meet some people. 178 00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:10,984 That is my advice to you. 179 00:09:11,018 --> 00:09:12,785 You gotta--You gotta put that out! 180 00:09:12,820 --> 00:09:15,788 All right! Don't get all twisted up. 181 00:09:18,958 --> 00:09:21,161 There. It's out. 182 00:09:21,193 --> 00:09:24,731 And so am I. The morning shot to hell. 183 00:09:33,907 --> 00:09:36,342 "Hold upright. Pull away pin. 184 00:09:36,375 --> 00:09:38,979 Stand eight feet from the flame." 185 00:09:39,011 --> 00:09:40,947 One, two, 186 00:09:40,980 --> 00:09:42,149 three four--No. 187 00:09:42,182 --> 00:09:43,850 [knocking on door] 188 00:09:43,884 --> 00:09:46,687 Hello? 189 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,288 Mr. Monk? 190 00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:50,758 Hello? 191 00:09:50,790 --> 00:09:52,692 Mr. Monk? Two, three-- 192 00:09:52,725 --> 00:09:53,860 Are you okay? 193 00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:55,294 Five-- What are you doing? 194 00:09:55,327 --> 00:09:57,197 Measuring. It says eight feet--Stay back! 195 00:09:57,230 --> 00:09:59,066 No, no, they mean approximately. 196 00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:00,232 No, no. 197 00:10:00,267 --> 00:10:01,969 It doesn't say approximately. 198 00:10:02,001 --> 00:10:03,770 You have to trust the label makers. 199 00:10:03,803 --> 00:10:04,837 They're professional label makers. 200 00:10:04,871 --> 00:10:06,173 Just gimme that! 201 00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:08,642 Wait a second, you're too close! 202 00:10:12,879 --> 00:10:15,783 Are you okay? 203 00:10:15,816 --> 00:10:18,418 We did it. 204 00:10:18,451 --> 00:10:21,754 I'm gonna write these people a letter. 205 00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,355 We coulda been killed. 206 00:10:23,389 --> 00:10:24,991 They should say "approximately." 207 00:10:25,024 --> 00:10:26,659 Are you Monk? 208 00:10:26,693 --> 00:10:28,128 Yeah. 209 00:10:28,161 --> 00:10:29,361 Adrian Monk? 210 00:10:29,395 --> 00:10:31,163 Right. The detective? 211 00:10:31,197 --> 00:10:36,903 The famous, admired, respected detective? 212 00:10:36,937 --> 00:10:39,005 [creaking] 213 00:10:39,038 --> 00:10:40,941 If you still want the job, 214 00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:44,677 we can go talk in the kitchen. 215 00:10:44,711 --> 00:10:45,812 What job? 216 00:10:45,846 --> 00:10:47,246 Aren't you here from the agency? 217 00:10:47,279 --> 00:10:50,951 No. I came here to hire you. 218 00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,085 I'm Natalie Teeger. 219 00:10:54,254 --> 00:10:57,124 Captain Stottlemeyer said that you might be able to help me. 220 00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:58,290 No. 221 00:10:58,325 --> 00:11:00,860 He said you were the best cop he's ever met. 222 00:11:00,894 --> 00:11:02,730 I guess he's never seen you put out a fire. 223 00:11:02,763 --> 00:11:04,764 Well, I'm sorry, but, um, 224 00:11:04,798 --> 00:11:07,366 I'm not really taking any work right now. 225 00:11:07,399 --> 00:11:10,903 I recently lost a dear friend. 226 00:11:13,139 --> 00:11:15,207 Oh. I'm so sorry. 227 00:11:15,241 --> 00:11:16,976 Who died? 228 00:11:17,009 --> 00:11:20,279 Nobody died. My nurse quit. 229 00:11:20,312 --> 00:11:24,216 The Captain said you might change your mind. 230 00:11:26,485 --> 00:11:28,054 Okay, look, I can pay you. 231 00:11:28,087 --> 00:11:30,123 I'm not rich, but I can borrow money if I have to. 232 00:11:30,157 --> 00:11:32,024 No-- I can take out a loan. 233 00:11:32,058 --> 00:11:34,761 I can't. Um, I just--I can't. 234 00:11:36,229 --> 00:11:38,230 There was a man in my house last night. 235 00:11:38,264 --> 00:11:40,200 I killed him. 236 00:11:43,169 --> 00:11:45,905 There was another man in my house a couple of days ago. 237 00:11:45,938 --> 00:11:48,174 They're after something. 238 00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:49,743 I can't figure it out. 239 00:11:49,777 --> 00:11:52,078 Nobody can. 240 00:11:52,111 --> 00:11:53,746 Do you have kids? 241 00:11:53,780 --> 00:11:54,847 N-No. 242 00:11:54,881 --> 00:11:55,915 I do. 243 00:11:55,948 --> 00:11:58,018 I have an 11-year-old daughter. 244 00:11:58,051 --> 00:12:02,221 Mr. Monk, I don't say this very often. 245 00:12:02,254 --> 00:12:04,157 But I'm scared. 246 00:12:04,191 --> 00:12:06,058 Yeah, look-- Please. 247 00:12:06,092 --> 00:12:07,995 Help me. 248 00:12:08,028 --> 00:12:09,863 Please. 249 00:12:09,897 --> 00:12:11,730 Help us. 250 00:12:46,834 --> 00:12:47,900 [whispers] It's okay. 251 00:13:16,096 --> 00:13:18,865 Is there money in the house? 252 00:13:18,899 --> 00:13:20,000 No. 253 00:13:20,033 --> 00:13:21,168 What about the coffee can? 254 00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:23,536 Isn't that where you hide your money? 255 00:13:23,570 --> 00:13:25,437 How did you know that? 256 00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:28,041 There's coffee grounds on the counter 257 00:13:28,075 --> 00:13:29,576 indicating that it's been opened recently, 258 00:13:29,609 --> 00:13:33,113 but you don't have a coffeemaker. 259 00:13:33,145 --> 00:13:36,048 (girl) Wow, he's like Velma from Scooby-Doo. 260 00:13:36,082 --> 00:13:37,549 I-I had money in there, 261 00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:41,221 but I spent in on luxury items like food and rent. 262 00:13:46,426 --> 00:13:49,096 You grew 5/8s of an inch. 263 00:13:52,631 --> 00:13:55,168 Your husband was in the Navy? 264 00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:56,469 Yeah, he died six years ago. 265 00:13:56,503 --> 00:13:58,205 He was a pilot. 266 00:14:02,942 --> 00:14:06,913 And you recently started dating again. 267 00:14:09,015 --> 00:14:10,182 How did you know that? 268 00:14:10,216 --> 00:14:11,150 It's patently obvious. 269 00:14:11,183 --> 00:14:17,190 I happened to notice these in your coat pocket. 270 00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:19,859 Birth control pills. 271 00:14:25,398 --> 00:14:27,234 Oh, I'm sorry. 272 00:14:27,267 --> 00:14:29,001 I can't believe you just did that! 273 00:14:29,036 --> 00:14:30,269 Right in front of my daughter? 274 00:14:30,302 --> 00:14:31,171 What is wrong with you? 275 00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:33,173 Do you have, like, zero social skills? 276 00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:35,274 Mom, it's okay. I'm not a baby. 277 00:14:35,307 --> 00:14:37,144 Wait a minute! 278 00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:39,211 Wait a minute. Oh, my mistake. 279 00:14:39,245 --> 00:14:41,581 These are not birth control pills. 280 00:14:41,614 --> 00:14:43,149 These are Tic-Tacs. 281 00:14:43,182 --> 00:14:47,653 Just little pink and green Tic-Tac candies. 282 00:14:47,687 --> 00:14:48,989 But don't eat 'em. 283 00:14:49,022 --> 00:14:50,289 They're...they're special, 284 00:14:50,322 --> 00:14:56,363 adult, you know, Tic-Tacs--[breathes deeply] 285 00:15:02,001 --> 00:15:03,135 Detective Monk, wha--[exhales]-- 286 00:15:03,169 --> 00:15:05,304 What do you think these guys are after? 287 00:15:05,337 --> 00:15:06,072 I don't know. 288 00:15:06,105 --> 00:15:11,677 Okay, we--we have two intruders? 289 00:15:11,711 --> 00:15:14,346 One last night, one two days ago. 290 00:15:14,380 --> 00:15:17,350 Both in this room? Where were they exactly? 291 00:15:17,384 --> 00:15:20,519 Uh, just around the television, 292 00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:33,299 Is this yours? 293 00:15:33,332 --> 00:15:36,336 Um, no, mine's over there. 294 00:15:43,676 --> 00:15:44,711 It's brand-new. 295 00:15:44,744 --> 00:15:46,312 It's never been used. 296 00:15:46,346 --> 00:15:49,182 I can't believe all those detectives missed that. 297 00:15:49,216 --> 00:15:50,082 Well, they probably saw it. 298 00:15:50,116 --> 00:15:53,086 They just didn't give it a second thought. 299 00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:55,355 Do you have a baggie? 300 00:15:55,388 --> 00:15:58,191 Uh...yes. 301 00:16:10,037 --> 00:16:13,273 Is this light always on? 302 00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:14,606 Actually, it was off last night. 303 00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:15,774 I didn't turn it on. 304 00:16:15,807 --> 00:16:17,043 Me neither. 305 00:16:17,076 --> 00:16:19,278 Tell me about the fish. 306 00:16:19,312 --> 00:16:20,379 His name is Mr. Henry. 307 00:16:20,413 --> 00:16:22,315 My father gave him to me. 308 00:16:22,349 --> 00:16:24,350 Wait, w-wait, wait, wait. 309 00:16:24,384 --> 00:16:26,753 You think they're after the fish? 310 00:16:26,786 --> 00:16:28,321 Why? 311 00:16:36,796 --> 00:16:38,097 Ugh-Oh. 312 00:16:38,130 --> 00:16:39,698 (Monk) You smell that? What is that? 313 00:16:39,731 --> 00:16:41,100 (Natalie) It's a pet store. 314 00:16:41,134 --> 00:16:43,070 Haven't you ever been in a pet store? 315 00:16:43,102 --> 00:16:44,071 (Monk) No. 316 00:16:44,104 --> 00:16:45,004 What have you been doing? 317 00:16:45,038 --> 00:16:47,274 For one thing, I've been avoiding pet stores. 318 00:16:47,307 --> 00:16:48,475 Hey, Carl. 319 00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:49,709 Hello, Mrs. Teeger. 320 00:16:49,741 --> 00:16:52,178 Hey. I wanna talk to you about this fish. 321 00:16:52,211 --> 00:16:53,812 Is there anything special? 322 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:56,448 Anything unusual about him I should know? 323 00:16:56,482 --> 00:16:58,150 Like what? Is he sick? 324 00:16:58,184 --> 00:16:59,719 He looks okay to me. 325 00:16:59,751 --> 00:17:02,221 No, no, I mean, is he valuable? 326 00:17:02,254 --> 00:17:03,655 He's just a marble fish, Mrs. Teeger. 327 00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:05,357 We sell 'em for 99 cents. 328 00:17:05,392 --> 00:17:07,294 We got about a thousand of 'em. 329 00:17:07,326 --> 00:17:08,494 If you'd like your money back-- 330 00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,096 No, Carl, I'm not returning him. 331 00:17:10,130 --> 00:17:11,364 Is there any reason 332 00:17:11,397 --> 00:17:14,134 why someone might want this particular fish? 333 00:17:14,166 --> 00:17:16,803 I mean, really, really want him? 334 00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:20,772 Uh, well, he's sorta pretty. 335 00:17:20,807 --> 00:17:23,242 And he's got a thin, black stripe on his dorsal fin-- 336 00:17:23,276 --> 00:17:25,211 Mr. Monk, what do you think? 337 00:17:25,244 --> 00:17:27,480 Mr. Monk? 338 00:17:27,513 --> 00:17:28,847 Look at this guy. 339 00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:32,152 He's eating out of two trays at one time. 340 00:17:32,184 --> 00:17:37,257 He's keeping them even. They're perfectly even. 341 00:17:37,289 --> 00:17:38,258 Yeah, it's Sergeant Pepper. 342 00:17:38,290 --> 00:17:40,426 Hey, you want him? You can have him for free. 343 00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:41,627 We can't get rid of him. 344 00:17:41,661 --> 00:17:43,262 Customers keep bringing him back. 345 00:17:43,296 --> 00:17:44,364 How come? 346 00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:46,133 Mm, he's depressing, 347 00:17:46,165 --> 00:17:47,634 he doesn't talk, he just mopes around, 348 00:17:47,666 --> 00:17:49,368 cleaning himself, straightening up his cage. 349 00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:52,239 His cage always has to be perfect. 350 00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:54,273 Hm. What's wrong with him? 351 00:17:54,307 --> 00:17:56,143 His wife died. 352 00:17:56,175 --> 00:17:59,278 Yeah. That's right. 353 00:17:59,311 --> 00:18:01,614 We had a female in there with him. 354 00:18:01,647 --> 00:18:03,150 She died about a year ago. 355 00:18:03,182 --> 00:18:04,217 He hasn't been the same ever since. 356 00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:06,286 Well, why don't you put another female in there? 357 00:18:06,318 --> 00:18:07,319 It won't work. 358 00:18:07,354 --> 00:18:10,190 He'll never feel the same way about anybody else. 359 00:18:10,222 --> 00:18:11,223 Yeah, that's right. 360 00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:13,192 We tried it, but... 361 00:18:13,226 --> 00:18:15,728 I'm afraid Sergeant Pepper's just gonna grow old 362 00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:19,266 and die alone in his little cage. 363 00:18:24,703 --> 00:18:28,508 So what was her name? 364 00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:30,410 Trudy. 365 00:18:38,851 --> 00:18:40,319 It's a goldfish. 366 00:18:40,353 --> 00:18:41,253 (Monk) Well, technically, 367 00:18:41,288 --> 00:18:43,289 it's a crimson marble fish. 368 00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:44,490 Is it extinct? 369 00:18:44,523 --> 00:18:46,792 If it was extinct, 370 00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:48,461 we wouldn't be looking at it, would we? 371 00:18:48,494 --> 00:18:50,396 Is it rare? Valuable? 372 00:18:50,430 --> 00:18:51,198 Costs about a dollar. 373 00:18:51,230 --> 00:18:53,333 Any pet store has a hundred of 'em. 374 00:18:53,365 --> 00:18:54,567 I don't know. 375 00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:57,769 He brought a fishing net into the house. 376 00:18:57,804 --> 00:18:59,572 And he turned on the light over the aquarium. 377 00:18:59,605 --> 00:19:00,740 Well, does anybody have any ideas? 378 00:19:00,772 --> 00:19:02,275 (Randy) Maybe it swallowed something. 379 00:19:02,308 --> 00:19:03,576 Like, a diamond. 380 00:19:03,609 --> 00:19:06,179 Does anybody besides Randy have any ideas? 381 00:19:06,212 --> 00:19:09,316 Monk, come here. 382 00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:11,417 Look, how's it goin'? 383 00:19:11,451 --> 00:19:13,220 I've been worried about you. 384 00:19:13,252 --> 00:19:15,355 No, uh, I've been worried about me too. 385 00:19:15,387 --> 00:19:18,325 How are those interviews going? Did you find anybody? 386 00:19:18,357 --> 00:19:20,326 I've narrowed it down. 387 00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:22,194 To nobody. 388 00:19:23,962 --> 00:19:26,199 Whatever happened with your wife's niece? 389 00:19:26,232 --> 00:19:27,400 The one who's the nurse? 390 00:19:27,433 --> 00:19:28,367 She never called me. 391 00:19:28,401 --> 00:19:30,303 Yeah, I know. 392 00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:33,405 Um...here's the thing, Monk. 393 00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,241 I love her. 394 00:19:35,275 --> 00:19:36,442 I understand. 395 00:19:36,476 --> 00:19:37,876 Captain! 396 00:19:37,910 --> 00:19:39,378 We ID'd the intruder that, uh, 397 00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,213 Miss Teeger killed. 398 00:19:41,248 --> 00:19:42,281 Brian Lemmon. 399 00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:43,682 Minor league creep. 400 00:19:43,715 --> 00:19:45,218 Does that ring a bell? 401 00:19:45,251 --> 00:19:46,586 Nah, never heard of him. 402 00:19:46,618 --> 00:19:49,489 One, two, three... five falls. 403 00:19:49,521 --> 00:19:53,359 Couple of B&E's and receiving stolen property. 404 00:19:53,393 --> 00:19:55,394 Was there an address book or anything in his wallet? 405 00:19:55,427 --> 00:19:57,329 No wallet, no keys. 406 00:19:57,364 --> 00:19:58,765 This is, uh, all we found. 407 00:19:58,798 --> 00:20:00,633 It was in his back pocket. 408 00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:03,336 "2:30 Sea of Tranquility." What is that? 409 00:20:03,369 --> 00:20:04,471 A club? No, I don't think so. 410 00:20:04,503 --> 00:20:07,339 Who'd want to go to a club called The Sea of Tranquility? 411 00:20:07,374 --> 00:20:08,441 Besides you. 412 00:20:08,474 --> 00:20:10,576 I think it's some kind of spa or holistic retreat-- 413 00:20:10,609 --> 00:20:11,411 No, it's not a spa? 414 00:20:11,443 --> 00:20:13,445 It's an exhibit at the Science Museum. 415 00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:16,383 My kid went there last week on a field trip. 416 00:20:24,523 --> 00:20:27,759 Mitch wanted to be an astronaut. 417 00:20:27,794 --> 00:20:30,529 That was his dream. 418 00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:32,565 Three days after his plane went down, 419 00:20:32,598 --> 00:20:35,434 he got a registered letter from NASA. 420 00:20:35,468 --> 00:20:38,671 He'd been accepted into their training program. 421 00:20:40,707 --> 00:20:43,276 It hurts, I know. 422 00:20:43,309 --> 00:20:45,511 Life goes on. 423 00:20:47,814 --> 00:20:50,383 Doesn't it? 424 00:20:52,818 --> 00:20:54,586 (man) Hello! I'm a white corpuscle! 425 00:20:54,621 --> 00:20:57,390 I'm an important part of your body's defense system! 426 00:20:57,423 --> 00:20:59,291 I travel through your bloodstream 427 00:20:59,326 --> 00:21:00,626 and I fight bacteria 428 00:21:00,660 --> 00:21:01,493 and diseases! 429 00:21:01,528 --> 00:21:03,462 Would you like to know more about me? 430 00:21:03,496 --> 00:21:05,632 No. I'd like to know less about you. 431 00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:25,017 They weren't big on dental hygiene, were they? 432 00:21:28,488 --> 00:21:30,056 Natalie. Hm? 433 00:21:30,088 --> 00:21:34,426 This man didn't freeze to death. 434 00:21:34,461 --> 00:21:35,761 He was murdered. 435 00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:38,597 There's a puncture wound in the side of his skull. 436 00:21:38,631 --> 00:21:40,700 It was over 30,000 years ago. 437 00:21:40,732 --> 00:21:43,502 Well, there's no statute of limitations on murder. 438 00:21:47,606 --> 00:21:48,907 I think I know what happened. 439 00:21:48,941 --> 00:21:51,443 Detective Monk, why don't we solve my case first? 440 00:21:51,478 --> 00:21:52,811 Then we'll come back here later 441 00:21:52,845 --> 00:21:55,815 and figure out who killed Og, okay? 442 00:22:01,488 --> 00:22:04,089 (tour guide) Welcome to the Sea of Tranquility, 443 00:22:04,123 --> 00:22:07,626 where, on July 20th, 1969, 444 00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:12,598 Commander Neil Armstrong took one small step for man, 445 00:22:12,632 --> 00:22:14,433 one giant leap for mankind. 446 00:22:14,467 --> 00:22:16,803 And those of us that are old enough to have seen it 447 00:22:16,836 --> 00:22:18,471 will never forget it. 448 00:22:18,505 --> 00:22:20,839 Now, over here is the highlight of our exhibit. 449 00:22:20,873 --> 00:22:24,576 This is an actual moon rock 450 00:22:24,611 --> 00:22:26,679 that was brought back by the crew of Apollo 11. 451 00:22:26,712 --> 00:22:28,480 There are only 234 moon rocks 452 00:22:28,515 --> 00:22:31,049 that were brought back to planet Earth. 453 00:22:31,083 --> 00:22:34,119 And we've cut a little hole here in the side of the exhibit 454 00:22:34,153 --> 00:22:35,954 so that you can reach in with your fingers 455 00:22:35,988 --> 00:22:37,457 and touch it if you want to. 456 00:22:37,490 --> 00:22:38,590 That's the guy. 457 00:22:38,625 --> 00:22:39,991 Who, the tour guide? 458 00:22:40,026 --> 00:22:41,528 He's the meter reader. 459 00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:43,962 That's the guy that was in my house. 460 00:22:51,703 --> 00:22:54,574 This is called a Plasma Sphere. 461 00:22:54,606 --> 00:22:57,644 And inside the sphere, there are millions of ions 462 00:22:57,676 --> 00:23:01,513 reacting to the electrical charge to create what? 463 00:23:01,548 --> 00:23:03,950 (Monk) You said the meter man had black hair. 464 00:23:03,982 --> 00:23:05,652 (Teeger) He must've been wearing a wig. 465 00:23:05,684 --> 00:23:06,786 But that's the guy. 466 00:23:06,818 --> 00:23:08,587 I work in a bar. I'm good with faces. 467 00:23:08,621 --> 00:23:10,690 Maybe we should say something. 468 00:23:10,722 --> 00:23:12,090 See how he reacts. 469 00:23:12,124 --> 00:23:14,894 No, if he is the guy, we don't want him to know we know. 470 00:23:14,926 --> 00:23:16,596 Okay. Let's go. 471 00:23:16,628 --> 00:23:18,498 (announcer) Welcome to The Miracle of Birth. 472 00:23:18,530 --> 00:23:19,932 Sexual reproduction 473 00:23:19,965 --> 00:23:21,834 is the fertilization of the female egg... 474 00:23:21,867 --> 00:23:22,934 We're gonna step carefully 475 00:23:22,969 --> 00:23:24,636 through this opening into the womb, 476 00:23:24,671 --> 00:23:29,008 and then we're gonna take a left up the fallopian tubes. 477 00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:30,643 Here we go. 478 00:23:30,676 --> 00:23:32,010 Do it carefully. That's it. 479 00:23:32,044 --> 00:23:33,746 Turn sideways if you have to. 480 00:23:33,779 --> 00:23:35,114 Now you're in the womb. 481 00:23:35,146 --> 00:23:38,017 Go left up the fallopian tubes. 482 00:23:38,049 --> 00:23:39,852 There we go. 483 00:23:42,654 --> 00:23:44,757 (announcer) Welcome to the Miracle of Birth. 484 00:23:44,790 --> 00:23:46,192 Sexual reproduction... 485 00:23:46,224 --> 00:23:48,595 Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. 486 00:23:48,627 --> 00:23:50,128 Detective Monk, hurry up. He's getting away! 487 00:23:50,162 --> 00:23:53,633 (announcer) You are standing in the uterus, which is commonly called-- 488 00:23:53,665 --> 00:23:55,535 Hurry! 489 00:24:01,773 --> 00:24:03,108 What are you doing? 490 00:24:03,142 --> 00:24:04,676 Ha! Ah! 491 00:24:04,711 --> 00:24:06,077 Wait. Okay, wait, wait, wait. 492 00:24:06,112 --> 00:24:07,713 Wait--Listen. 493 00:24:07,747 --> 00:24:10,782 Maybe I--I should've mentioned this earlier, but... 494 00:24:10,817 --> 00:24:13,786 I--See, the thing is, I have a number of phobias. 495 00:24:13,819 --> 00:24:15,153 You? No. 496 00:24:15,186 --> 00:24:16,489 Oh, yes. 497 00:24:16,522 --> 00:24:17,824 Yes, and one of them, 498 00:24:17,856 --> 00:24:20,792 near the top of the list, actually, 499 00:24:20,826 --> 00:24:22,662 is The Miracle of Birth. 500 00:24:22,694 --> 00:24:27,500 Y-You're gonna be okay. Just take my hand. 501 00:24:27,534 --> 00:24:28,734 [breathing heavily] 502 00:24:28,768 --> 00:24:31,703 Okay, fetus ahead! 503 00:24:33,705 --> 00:24:34,707 Oh, no! 504 00:24:34,740 --> 00:24:36,041 Ooh, I can't go up there. 505 00:24:36,075 --> 00:24:39,010 Ah, I-I don't even know this woman. 506 00:24:39,045 --> 00:24:40,779 Okay, but we're gonna lose him! 507 00:24:40,813 --> 00:24:42,749 Eh...pretend you're in a funhouse! 508 00:24:42,781 --> 00:24:43,982 Funhou--No. 509 00:24:44,016 --> 00:24:45,984 What's fun about fallopian tubes? 510 00:24:46,018 --> 00:24:47,720 I can't--I gotta... 511 00:24:47,753 --> 00:24:49,221 I can't now. 512 00:24:49,255 --> 00:24:50,823 Okay, you know what, just forget it, okay? 513 00:24:50,856 --> 00:24:52,692 We're outta here. 514 00:24:52,724 --> 00:24:54,226 Okay. 515 00:24:54,259 --> 00:24:56,895 No, no, no. We have to go through the pelvis. 516 00:24:56,929 --> 00:24:59,097 I think this is gonna be a cesarean. 517 00:24:59,131 --> 00:25:04,002 [alarm blaring] 518 00:25:05,872 --> 00:25:07,807 Here he is. Lyle Peck, tour guide. 519 00:25:07,839 --> 00:25:08,775 Okay, all right. 520 00:25:08,807 --> 00:25:11,778 I will have the Captain run a check on him. 521 00:25:11,810 --> 00:25:13,880 I can't believe you freaked out like that. 522 00:25:13,913 --> 00:25:16,583 Human sexuality is a natural thing. 523 00:25:16,615 --> 00:25:19,250 Well, we disagree about that. 524 00:25:39,005 --> 00:25:40,306 (Julie) Are you hungry? 525 00:25:40,338 --> 00:25:43,075 Here you go. 526 00:25:43,108 --> 00:25:45,811 You bought this kit in the gift shop at the museum? 527 00:25:45,845 --> 00:25:46,613 Uh-huh. 528 00:25:46,645 --> 00:25:48,914 Was the box open when you bought it? 529 00:25:48,948 --> 00:25:50,348 Maybe, I don't know. 530 00:25:50,382 --> 00:25:52,884 You think they're after something from the kit? 531 00:25:52,919 --> 00:25:54,721 Well, Peck works at the museum. 532 00:25:54,753 --> 00:25:56,255 He might've stashed something in the box, 533 00:25:56,288 --> 00:25:57,890 and now he's trying to get it back. 534 00:25:57,923 --> 00:26:00,893 Honey, when you bought this, did you give 'em your name? 535 00:26:00,926 --> 00:26:03,061 I might've signed a mailing list. 536 00:26:04,663 --> 00:26:07,799 What exactly was in the kit? 537 00:26:07,834 --> 00:26:10,803 Um, a rock, a treasure chest, a deep sea diver, 538 00:26:10,836 --> 00:26:12,904 and some gravel. 539 00:26:12,939 --> 00:26:14,606 Look in the treasure chest. 540 00:26:14,641 --> 00:26:16,275 Nah...nothing. 541 00:26:16,307 --> 00:26:17,676 What about the gravel? 542 00:26:17,710 --> 00:26:19,811 I don't see it. 543 00:26:19,846 --> 00:26:22,815 I'd like to take this whole aquarium back to the lab. 544 00:26:22,848 --> 00:26:23,849 Okay. 545 00:26:23,883 --> 00:26:25,284 Oh, wait, you know what, you can't. 546 00:26:25,317 --> 00:26:27,787 Uh, there's a science fair at Julie's school tonight. 547 00:26:27,819 --> 00:26:29,788 This is her project. 548 00:26:29,821 --> 00:26:30,990 Not anymore. 549 00:26:31,022 --> 00:26:32,157 What do you mean? 550 00:26:32,191 --> 00:26:34,125 Mr. Franklin disqualified me. 551 00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:37,028 He disqualified you? 552 00:26:47,673 --> 00:26:49,075 Mr. Franklin, I'm Natalie Teeger. 553 00:26:49,107 --> 00:26:50,108 I'm Julie's mother. 554 00:26:50,142 --> 00:26:51,644 Oh, yes. 555 00:26:51,677 --> 00:26:53,880 I remember you from parents' night. 556 00:26:53,913 --> 00:26:55,647 Excuse the mess. We've been making volcanoes. 557 00:26:55,682 --> 00:26:56,848 Did you tell Julie 558 00:26:56,883 --> 00:26:59,719 that she couldn't bring her fish to the science fair? 559 00:26:59,751 --> 00:27:02,221 Yes. I did. 560 00:27:02,253 --> 00:27:04,990 Mrs. Teeger, sit, please. 561 00:27:06,959 --> 00:27:09,662 Or stand. That's fine. 562 00:27:09,695 --> 00:27:13,865 Mrs. Teeger, you need to understand I teach Science, 563 00:27:13,900 --> 00:27:16,035 not Science Fiction. 564 00:27:16,067 --> 00:27:17,236 I can't approve a project 565 00:27:17,269 --> 00:27:19,270 if a student is just making things up. 566 00:27:19,305 --> 00:27:20,906 Are you saying Julie is lying? 567 00:27:20,940 --> 00:27:22,441 I don't know what to say. 568 00:27:22,473 --> 00:27:24,442 I've seen Julie's fish. 569 00:27:24,476 --> 00:27:26,712 It's an ordinary Crimson Marble Fish. 570 00:27:26,746 --> 00:27:29,715 She said she's had it since she was five. 571 00:27:29,749 --> 00:27:30,782 Yeah, that's right. 572 00:27:30,817 --> 00:27:31,884 That's impossible. 573 00:27:31,917 --> 00:27:35,186 A Marble Fish lives a year, year and a half at most. 574 00:27:35,221 --> 00:27:37,923 Either Judy's mistaken, or she's trying to pull a fast one. 575 00:27:37,957 --> 00:27:42,060 Either way, I have an obligation to my other students. 576 00:27:50,469 --> 00:27:52,003 What are you doing? 577 00:27:52,038 --> 00:27:54,339 Well, I was not happy about the way this-- 578 00:27:54,373 --> 00:27:55,775 Okay, you know, it doesn't matter. 579 00:27:55,807 --> 00:27:57,375 What do you call a guy who studies fish? 580 00:27:57,409 --> 00:27:58,877 An ichthyologist. 581 00:27:58,911 --> 00:27:59,979 That's what you are. 582 00:28:00,011 --> 00:28:01,047 No, I'm not. 583 00:28:01,079 --> 00:28:02,248 Yes, you are. 584 00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:03,883 I really don't think I am. 585 00:28:03,915 --> 00:28:05,384 Yeah, for the next five minutes, you are. 586 00:28:05,416 --> 00:28:07,053 I need you to tell Julie's teacher 587 00:28:07,086 --> 00:28:09,855 that a marble fish can live longer than two years, okay? 588 00:28:09,888 --> 00:28:12,391 Wait a minute, what? Wait, Natalie. 589 00:28:12,423 --> 00:28:15,027 Wait a second. Wait. 590 00:28:15,060 --> 00:28:17,096 Here's the thing. Uh, I can't lie. 591 00:28:17,128 --> 00:28:18,463 Uh, I'm not good at it. 592 00:28:18,497 --> 00:28:20,165 I got lucky with that Tic-Tac thing. 593 00:28:20,199 --> 00:28:21,400 Are you a man? 594 00:28:21,432 --> 00:28:22,835 Am I-- Are you a man? 595 00:28:22,868 --> 00:28:24,303 Yes. 596 00:28:24,336 --> 00:28:28,039 Then you can lie. That's what men do. 597 00:28:28,074 --> 00:28:29,508 Mr. Franklin? 598 00:28:29,540 --> 00:28:31,810 Uh, when Julie told me about your problem, 599 00:28:31,844 --> 00:28:33,945 I called Berkeley and talked to the Science Department, 600 00:28:33,980 --> 00:28:35,213 and found my own expert. 601 00:28:35,247 --> 00:28:38,317 This is Professor Larry Tilburn. 602 00:28:38,349 --> 00:28:40,886 He was kind enough to meet me here this morning. 603 00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:42,188 Hi. 604 00:28:42,221 --> 00:28:44,222 Hello. 605 00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:50,229 He's an ick...icky-- 606 00:28:50,261 --> 00:28:51,931 Ichthyologist. Ichthyologist. 607 00:28:51,963 --> 00:28:53,265 He's world renowned. 608 00:28:53,298 --> 00:28:57,036 Has written just a page-turner of a book on fresh water fish. 609 00:28:57,068 --> 00:28:58,304 Really? Mm-hmm. 610 00:28:58,336 --> 00:28:59,905 What's it called? 611 00:29:01,173 --> 00:29:05,076 Fresh Water Fish, by Larry Tilburn. 612 00:29:05,111 --> 00:29:07,078 Mm. Great title. 613 00:29:07,113 --> 00:29:10,115 Uh, I tried to read it, and just forget it. 614 00:29:10,148 --> 00:29:11,917 [laughs] 615 00:29:16,055 --> 00:29:18,124 Professor? 616 00:29:18,156 --> 00:29:19,557 Professor Tilburn? 617 00:29:19,590 --> 00:29:22,461 Professor Tilburn. 618 00:29:22,493 --> 00:29:25,998 Mr. Franklin here doesn't think that Julie's fish-- 619 00:29:26,031 --> 00:29:28,099 you know the one that I showed you-- 620 00:29:28,134 --> 00:29:30,236 could live longer than a year or two. 621 00:29:30,269 --> 00:29:32,805 What do you think? 622 00:29:34,539 --> 00:29:35,907 I think it can. 623 00:29:35,942 --> 00:29:37,143 I don't see how. 624 00:29:37,175 --> 00:29:39,444 It's a common variety marble fish. 625 00:29:39,478 --> 00:29:41,047 Has a miniscule genome size 626 00:29:41,079 --> 00:29:43,515 and almost no immune system. 627 00:29:43,548 --> 00:29:46,152 Let's go. 628 00:29:46,184 --> 00:29:47,586 Let's get outta here. 629 00:29:47,618 --> 00:29:49,555 [whispering] 630 00:29:49,587 --> 00:29:50,856 That's true. 631 00:29:50,890 --> 00:29:54,393 That's true... about most marble fish. 632 00:29:54,425 --> 00:29:57,128 But this is a completely different species. 633 00:29:57,163 --> 00:30:00,967 This is the North... 634 00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:02,401 Korean marble fish. 635 00:30:02,433 --> 00:30:03,434 North Korean? 636 00:30:03,469 --> 00:30:07,105 It's a very strong fish. 637 00:30:07,138 --> 00:30:09,842 It's a very tough fish. 638 00:30:09,875 --> 00:30:14,913 Would have to be to live in a country like, uh... 639 00:30:14,946 --> 00:30:16,082 (both) North Korea. 640 00:30:16,115 --> 00:30:17,282 Right. 641 00:30:17,316 --> 00:30:20,853 This fish could live for... 642 00:30:20,886 --> 00:30:23,855 oh, my God, three or four years. 643 00:30:23,890 --> 00:30:25,191 Four and a half... 644 00:30:25,223 --> 00:30:26,392 Or five. 645 00:30:26,424 --> 00:30:27,993 Or six. 646 00:30:28,027 --> 00:30:31,363 Or six--six--That's it. Six years. 647 00:30:31,396 --> 00:30:33,098 I'd like to read your book. 648 00:30:33,132 --> 00:30:35,067 What did you say your name was? 649 00:30:35,101 --> 00:30:37,403 Tilburn. 650 00:30:37,435 --> 00:30:38,569 Larry... 651 00:30:38,604 --> 00:30:42,074 T-I-L-B-U-R-N? 652 00:30:42,107 --> 00:30:44,042 Okay, okay, okay, okay! 653 00:30:46,177 --> 00:30:49,647 Truth is, it's not the same fish. 654 00:30:49,681 --> 00:30:51,049 Yes, it is. Sure it is. 655 00:30:51,083 --> 00:30:53,085 Let it go. 656 00:30:53,118 --> 00:30:54,319 I've replaced it every year. 657 00:30:54,353 --> 00:30:57,323 Julie's dad gave it to her before he died. 658 00:30:57,355 --> 00:30:59,357 I don't have the heart to tell her the truth. 659 00:30:59,391 --> 00:31:01,192 It's all that she has left of him. 660 00:31:01,227 --> 00:31:03,194 So, Mr. Franklin, if you wanna call that little girl 661 00:31:03,229 --> 00:31:05,596 and tell her that the fish that she's been talking to 662 00:31:05,631 --> 00:31:09,035 and praying to for the last six years is dead, 663 00:31:09,067 --> 00:31:10,402 then you know what, go ahead! 664 00:31:10,435 --> 00:31:11,502 I'll dial it for you. 665 00:31:11,537 --> 00:31:13,972 Okay, okay. I didn't know. 666 00:31:14,006 --> 00:31:16,241 She can bring the fish to the science fair. 667 00:31:16,275 --> 00:31:17,943 If you like, I'll even swing by 668 00:31:17,977 --> 00:31:20,078 your house later and pick up the aquarium. 669 00:31:20,112 --> 00:31:21,313 Thank you. 670 00:31:21,346 --> 00:31:24,150 But I can't give her an award. 671 00:31:24,182 --> 00:31:26,251 Mr. Franklin, she doesn't need an award. 672 00:31:26,285 --> 00:31:28,253 She just needs to make it through middle school 673 00:31:28,287 --> 00:31:29,121 without fallin' apart. 674 00:31:29,154 --> 00:31:30,957 Thank you, sir. 675 00:31:30,990 --> 00:31:33,358 Thank you, sir. 676 00:31:35,227 --> 00:31:37,963 You really are the worst liar in the whole world. 677 00:31:37,997 --> 00:31:39,464 I tried to tell you that. 678 00:31:39,498 --> 00:31:40,598 [scoffs] 679 00:31:40,632 --> 00:31:42,201 An honest man. 680 00:31:42,233 --> 00:31:45,636 Who'd have thunk it? 681 00:31:45,671 --> 00:31:49,441 Come on, Larry. I'll take you home. 682 00:32:14,532 --> 00:32:17,202 I'll just be a minute. I have to pick up my check. 683 00:32:17,236 --> 00:32:18,237 It's a nice place. 684 00:32:18,269 --> 00:32:19,538 It's a toilet. 685 00:32:19,570 --> 00:32:21,740 Uh, wouldn't exactly call it a toilet. 686 00:32:21,772 --> 00:32:23,209 Um, have a seat. 687 00:32:23,241 --> 00:32:25,111 Where? 688 00:32:25,144 --> 00:32:28,346 (Natalie) Uh, well, there's a lot of chairs. Take your pick. 689 00:32:28,380 --> 00:32:30,348 (Monk) Ugh. 690 00:32:34,086 --> 00:32:36,055 How about that one? 691 00:32:40,026 --> 00:32:41,126 Or that one. 692 00:32:41,160 --> 00:32:44,230 Natalie, so I've been thinking. 693 00:32:44,262 --> 00:32:50,501 Uh, if you--if you really hate it here. 694 00:32:50,536 --> 00:32:54,039 I mean, if you're really not happy-- 695 00:32:54,073 --> 00:32:59,010 If you really hate it here... 696 00:32:59,045 --> 00:33:02,080 I am looking for a new assistant. 697 00:33:02,114 --> 00:33:05,517 Thank you, Adrian. I appreciate that. 698 00:33:05,550 --> 00:33:07,385 But I'm not the "Girl Friday" type. 699 00:33:07,419 --> 00:33:09,121 Yeah, I understand. 700 00:33:09,154 --> 00:33:10,455 I couldn't work for me either. 701 00:33:10,489 --> 00:33:12,657 To tell you the truth, 702 00:33:12,691 --> 00:33:17,762 I don't know how--how Sharona lasted as long as she did. 703 00:33:26,204 --> 00:33:28,173 Hey, Clem, I need to pick up my paycheck. 704 00:33:28,207 --> 00:33:30,241 Yeah, right here. 705 00:33:30,276 --> 00:33:32,478 Actually, I was just about to call you. 706 00:33:32,510 --> 00:33:34,645 Carly just walked. I need you to fill in tonight. 707 00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:36,082 Yeah, I can't help you. 708 00:33:36,115 --> 00:33:37,583 There's a science fair at my kid's school. 709 00:33:37,615 --> 00:33:39,585 Well, I got a kid too, but I'm here. 710 00:33:39,617 --> 00:33:41,353 Your kid's in jail, Clem. 711 00:33:41,386 --> 00:33:43,088 You think that's funny, huh? 712 00:33:43,122 --> 00:33:46,192 You know, Teeger, I'm getting pretty tired of your attitude. 713 00:33:46,224 --> 00:33:49,260 All right, the last time I asked you to help me out here, 714 00:33:49,295 --> 00:33:50,496 you bailed on me. 715 00:33:50,528 --> 00:33:52,131 Are you talking about yesterday? 716 00:33:52,163 --> 00:33:53,765 Sorry I couldn't be here, Clem. 717 00:33:53,798 --> 00:33:56,468 I was watchin' the cops carry a body out of my house. 718 00:33:56,501 --> 00:33:57,435 Yeah. I heard about that. 719 00:33:57,469 --> 00:34:00,172 Well, I guess you did what you had to do. 720 00:34:00,205 --> 00:34:01,173 Yeah. 721 00:34:01,207 --> 00:34:03,808 And that's exactly what I'm doing right now. 722 00:34:03,842 --> 00:34:06,112 I got a business to run, Teeger. 723 00:34:06,144 --> 00:34:13,152 So you wanna see more of these or not? 724 00:34:13,184 --> 00:34:14,753 Fine. I'll be here. 725 00:34:14,786 --> 00:34:17,688 Good. 726 00:34:17,722 --> 00:34:20,326 Where are you? 727 00:34:22,527 --> 00:34:23,795 Ready? 728 00:34:23,829 --> 00:34:25,664 Natalie. I know what they're after. 729 00:34:25,697 --> 00:34:27,465 You do? Where's Julie? 730 00:34:27,498 --> 00:34:30,302 Wh-Where's Julie? 731 00:34:31,503 --> 00:34:33,239 (Boy) This is my fire extinguisher. 732 00:34:33,271 --> 00:34:36,175 I invented it myself using an oxygen tank, 733 00:34:36,208 --> 00:34:39,311 some compressed air, and an ordinary garden hose. 734 00:34:39,344 --> 00:34:40,478 Where is she? 735 00:34:40,512 --> 00:34:41,746 I don't know. I don't know. 736 00:34:41,780 --> 00:34:42,813 Oh, Stacy. 737 00:34:42,847 --> 00:34:43,815 Have you seen Julie? 738 00:34:43,849 --> 00:34:45,351 I think she's over there. 739 00:34:48,487 --> 00:34:50,222 (Monk) Captain, thank you for coming. 740 00:34:50,255 --> 00:34:51,021 Okay, fill me in. 741 00:34:51,056 --> 00:34:53,224 Okay. I know what they've been after. 742 00:34:53,259 --> 00:34:55,193 Look. 743 00:34:55,226 --> 00:34:57,329 The moonrock. 744 00:34:57,362 --> 00:35:00,231 It's the most valuable rock in the world. 745 00:35:00,266 --> 00:35:02,134 It's more valuable than any diamond. 746 00:35:02,168 --> 00:35:03,735 A rock half this size 747 00:35:03,768 --> 00:35:05,670 was sold in Japan for $2 million. 748 00:35:05,704 --> 00:35:07,239 Okay. 749 00:35:07,273 --> 00:35:09,807 Well, I knew that I had seen that rock before somewhere. 750 00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:13,244 It was in Julie Teeger's aquarium. 751 00:35:13,278 --> 00:35:15,313 It was right in front of us the whole time. 752 00:35:15,347 --> 00:35:16,748 Here's what happened: 753 00:35:16,782 --> 00:35:18,817 There's a tour guide at the museum named Peck. 754 00:35:18,849 --> 00:35:20,351 Lyle Peck. 755 00:35:20,385 --> 00:35:23,655 Last weekend, he stole the moonrock. 756 00:35:23,688 --> 00:35:27,326 It was probably Sunday night after they closed. 757 00:35:27,358 --> 00:35:30,362 He waited until the guards were distracted 758 00:35:30,396 --> 00:35:31,797 or between shifts. 759 00:35:31,829 --> 00:35:33,599 Peck has worked there for years. 760 00:35:33,632 --> 00:35:34,800 He's practically a fixture, 761 00:35:34,833 --> 00:35:37,936 so he definitely knew the routine. 762 00:35:37,969 --> 00:35:39,371 (Captain) Why didn't the museum report it? 763 00:35:39,405 --> 00:35:41,806 (Monk) The museum never missed it. 764 00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:44,809 They didn't know it was stolen. They still don't! 765 00:35:44,842 --> 00:35:48,246 Peck replaced it with an exact duplicate. 766 00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:50,516 Wait, you mean this is just a regular rock? 767 00:35:50,548 --> 00:35:52,784 Sonofabitch, I stood in line for half an hour 768 00:35:52,818 --> 00:35:54,320 just to touch this stupid thing. 769 00:35:54,353 --> 00:35:56,454 Right. But Peck had a problem. 770 00:35:56,487 --> 00:35:58,423 He still had to get the moonrock 771 00:35:58,456 --> 00:35:59,690 out of the building. 772 00:35:59,724 --> 00:36:01,893 They were searching everybody. Even the employees. 773 00:36:04,695 --> 00:36:06,565 (Monk) So since there was no way for him to get it 774 00:36:06,597 --> 00:36:11,670 through security, he had to improvise. 775 00:36:11,702 --> 00:36:14,606 He hid the rock in the gift shop. 776 00:36:14,639 --> 00:36:19,577 Inside one of those Aquarium kits. 777 00:36:19,610 --> 00:36:21,913 Then he marked the box. 778 00:36:21,947 --> 00:36:24,382 He probably planned to have his accomplice, Brian Lemmon, 779 00:36:24,416 --> 00:36:25,884 pick it up the next morning. 780 00:36:25,916 --> 00:36:29,721 (Captain) But the girl got there first. 781 00:36:29,755 --> 00:36:32,724 (Monk) Exactly, Julie Teeger bought it that morning 782 00:36:32,757 --> 00:36:36,628 and took it home. 783 00:36:36,661 --> 00:36:40,865 The next day Peck tried to steal it, 784 00:36:40,898 --> 00:36:42,400 posing as a meter reader. 785 00:36:42,434 --> 00:36:44,702 When that didn't work, Brian Lemmon broke in. 786 00:36:44,735 --> 00:36:46,405 But he didn't count on Natalie waking up 787 00:36:46,438 --> 00:36:48,407 or that pair of scissors. 788 00:36:48,440 --> 00:36:50,608 [chuckling] 789 00:36:50,641 --> 00:36:52,443 What? 790 00:36:52,478 --> 00:36:53,512 You're back. 791 00:36:55,914 --> 00:36:56,882 Natalie. 792 00:36:56,914 --> 00:36:57,882 This is Mr. Henry. 793 00:36:57,916 --> 00:36:58,916 We gotta grab that rock. 794 00:36:58,949 --> 00:36:59,918 Just... 795 00:36:59,951 --> 00:37:01,452 Mr. Henry is a marble fish. 796 00:37:01,487 --> 00:37:04,322 And most marble fish only live for about a year. 797 00:37:04,356 --> 00:37:07,492 But Mr. Henry is six years old, 798 00:37:07,525 --> 00:37:09,295 and he's still as frisky as ever. 799 00:37:09,327 --> 00:37:12,398 And that is thanks to my special diet 800 00:37:12,431 --> 00:37:15,400 of ground-up vitamins, Rice Crispies, 801 00:37:15,434 --> 00:37:16,802 and cucumbers. 802 00:37:40,559 --> 00:37:41,360 Fire! 803 00:37:41,393 --> 00:37:43,329 It's on fire. 804 00:37:46,764 --> 00:37:48,032 (Captain) All right, everybody stay calm. 805 00:37:48,065 --> 00:37:49,034 No running. 806 00:37:49,067 --> 00:37:50,436 Stay calm. 807 00:37:50,469 --> 00:37:51,570 Here use this. 808 00:37:51,603 --> 00:37:52,704 It's a fire extinguisher. 809 00:37:52,737 --> 00:37:54,440 Thanks, kid. 810 00:37:58,409 --> 00:37:59,378 What's in this? 811 00:37:59,411 --> 00:38:01,813 Turpentine. 812 00:38:18,829 --> 00:38:21,065 He stole my fish! 813 00:38:21,099 --> 00:38:22,601 (Monk) Peck! 814 00:38:27,606 --> 00:38:28,606 Peck! 815 00:38:34,445 --> 00:38:35,547 Peck! 816 00:38:40,751 --> 00:38:41,753 Peck! 817 00:38:42,887 --> 00:38:44,021 Peck! 818 00:38:45,456 --> 00:38:47,057 Stop! 819 00:39:46,184 --> 00:39:47,418 (man) Peck! 820 00:39:47,452 --> 00:39:48,920 Don't move. 821 00:39:50,755 --> 00:39:51,789 On your face. 822 00:40:00,565 --> 00:40:02,467 Look out, I got a fish here! 823 00:40:02,501 --> 00:40:05,637 Coming through, flapping around! Flapping fish! 824 00:40:05,670 --> 00:40:07,905 (Mr. Franklin) ...He's the world's foremost authority on marble fish. 825 00:40:07,938 --> 00:40:09,974 Oh, Monk! Monk. 826 00:40:10,007 --> 00:40:11,510 Aah! 827 00:40:11,543 --> 00:40:13,445 Get him, get him. 828 00:40:13,478 --> 00:40:14,913 Oh, hold on, Mr. Henry. 829 00:40:14,945 --> 00:40:16,514 Look out! 830 00:40:16,547 --> 00:40:18,750 Coming through. Coming through. 831 00:40:26,757 --> 00:40:27,893 Oh. 832 00:40:41,972 --> 00:40:46,844 [girls laughing] 833 00:40:46,878 --> 00:40:48,679 Pretty crazy day, huh? 834 00:40:48,713 --> 00:40:51,215 Think you'll be able to sleep? 835 00:40:51,248 --> 00:40:52,217 Yeah, I think so. 836 00:40:52,250 --> 00:40:54,753 How's Mr. Henry? 837 00:40:54,786 --> 00:40:56,054 Oh, he's fine. 838 00:40:56,086 --> 00:40:59,257 He's a very brave fish. 839 00:40:59,289 --> 00:41:01,559 Mr. Monk saved his life. 840 00:41:01,592 --> 00:41:04,596 You know that moonrock is worth over two million bucks? 841 00:41:04,630 --> 00:41:06,998 But when Mr. Henry was in trouble, 842 00:41:07,032 --> 00:41:10,101 Mr. Monk forgot all about that moonrock. 843 00:41:10,135 --> 00:41:12,938 All he cared about was saving Mr. Henry. 844 00:41:12,971 --> 00:41:15,974 I could only think of one other man in the whole world 845 00:41:16,007 --> 00:41:18,844 who would have done something like that. 846 00:41:18,876 --> 00:41:20,545 Daddy. 847 00:41:20,579 --> 00:41:21,847 Daddy. 848 00:41:23,981 --> 00:41:26,918 I love you, angel. 849 00:41:26,952 --> 00:41:28,753 Love you too. 850 00:41:28,786 --> 00:41:29,788 Okay, good night. 851 00:41:29,820 --> 00:41:30,789 Good night. 852 00:41:30,822 --> 00:41:32,557 Oh, sleep well. 853 00:41:53,778 --> 00:41:55,646 Mr. Monk, it's Natalie Teeger. 854 00:41:55,681 --> 00:41:57,047 Yeah, I was calling to see 855 00:41:57,081 --> 00:41:59,985 if you still needed the assistant. 856 00:42:00,018 --> 00:42:02,554 No, I can't come tonight. 857 00:42:02,588 --> 00:42:05,222 Because I can't leave my daughter. 858 00:42:05,255 --> 00:42:07,559 Okay, okay, okay, just relax. 859 00:42:07,592 --> 00:42:08,893 How big is the spider? 860 00:42:08,927 --> 00:42:12,230 Captioning by CaptionMax www.captionmax.com