>> Dicky: FROM HOLLYWOOD, IT'S "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE"! TONIGHT,
ANTHONY MACKIE, EDGAR RAMIREZ, AND MUSIC FROM TUNE‐YARDS.
AND NOW JIMMY KIMMEL!
>> Jimmy: HI, THERE, I'M JIMMY, I'M THE HOST. WELCOME, THANK YOU.
TOP OF THE ALMOST MORNING TO YA. HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY.
THIS IS INTERESTING, IT'S A BIT OF HISTORY I DIDN'T KNOW.
I GOOGLED ST. PATRICK TODAY AND THE FIRST LINE THAT CAME BACK
WAS "ST. PATRICK WASN'T ACTUALLY IRISH." THAT'S FAKE NEWS TOO?
[ LAUGHTER ]
WHO THE HELL KNEW THAT? ST. PATRICK IS BELIEVED TO HAVE
BEEN BORN IN SCOTLAND TO ROMAN PARENTS.
WHICH WOULD MEAN HE WAS ITALIAN. WHEN HE WAS 16, HE WAS KIDNAPPED
AND TAKEN TO IRELAND AS A SLAVE. AND THEN HERE WE ARE TODAY GOING
"KISS ME! SLAINTE!"
[ LAUGHTER ]
SOME STORY. NO REASON TO CELEBRATE.
AND THE SHAMROCK, DO YOU KNOW WHY THE SHAMROCK IS THE NATIONAL
SYMBOL OF IRELAND? GUILLERMO? GO AHEAD, EXPLAIN.
>> Guillermo: OH. I DON'T KNOW, JIMMY.
>> Jimmy: YOU DON'T KNOW, OKAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
BECAUSE, ACCORDING TO LEGEND, ST. PATRICK, THE ITALIAN GUY, HE
SAID, "I NEEDA SOME‐A PARSLEY FOR MY LINGUINE VONGOLE."
NO. HE FOUND A THREE‐LEAF CLOVER AND
PICKED IT AND USED IT TO EXPLAIN THE CONCEPT OF THE HOLY TRINITY,
THE FATHER, SON, AND THE HOLY SPIRIT BEING ONE AND THREE AT
THE SAME TIME. IT'S A GOOD THING A THREE‐LEGGED
DOG DIDN'T WALK BY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
OR IRELAND WOULD HAVE A PRETTY WEIRD NATIONAL SYMBOL RIGHT NOW.
HERE IN THE UNITED STATES CELEBRATIONS WERE SCALED BACK
THIS YEAR BECAUSE OF SOME KIND OF VIRUS GOING AROUND.
[ LAUGHTER ]
BUT THERE IS ONE TRADITION I REFUSE TO SURRENDER TO COVID.
OR TO ANYTHING. EVERY YEAR ON ST. PATRICK'S DAY
GOING BACK 15 YEARS NOW, WE SHOW WHAT I STILL BELIEVE IS THE
GREATEST LOCAL NEWS STORY IN THE HISTORY OF BROADCAST JOURNALISM.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
SO LET'S TAKE A TRIP NOW TO THE YEAR 2006 TO THE TOWN OF MOBILE,
ALABAMA WHERE CROWDS GATHERED TO LAY EYES ON A REAL‐LIFE
LEPRECHAUN.
>> CURIOSITY LEADS TO LARGE CROWDS IN MOBILE'S CRICHTON
COMMUNITY. MANY BRING BINOCULARS, CAMCORDERS, CAMERA PHONES TO
PLAY PICTURES.
>> ALL YOU GOT TO LOOK UP IN THE TREE, WHO ELSE INTO LEPRECHAUNS
SAY YAY!
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: THE YAYS HAVE IT. UNFORTUNATELY, THE NEWS CREW DID
NOT SEE THE LEPRECHAUN OR SAY YEAH BUT LUCKILY THERE WAS A
VERY TALENTED ARTIST ON HAND TO HELP.
>> EYEWITNESSES SAY THE LEPRECHAUN ONLY COMES OUT AT
NIGHT IF YOU SHINE A LIGHT IN ITS DIRECTION, IT SUDDENLY
DISAPPEARS. THIS AMATEUR SKETCH RESEMBLES
WHAT MANY OF YOU SAY THE LEPRECHAUN LOOKS LIKE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: THAT'S HIM, OFFICER. THAT'S THE GUY WHO STOLE MY POT
OF GOLD. NOT EVERYONE IN CREIGHTON
BELIEVED THE LEPRECHAUN HYPE. THIS WOMAN HAD A MUCH MORE
PRACTICAL HYPOTHESIS FOR WHAT MIGHT BE IN THAT TREE.
>> OTHERS FIND IT HARD TO BELIEVE AND HAVE COME UP WITH
THEIR OWN THEORIES AND EXPLANATIONS FOR THE IMAGE.
>> COULD BE A CRACKHEAD. GOING TO THE WRONG STUFF.
TOLD IT TO GET UP IN THE TREE AND PLAY A LEPRECHAUN.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: THE CRACKHEAD WHO GOT THE WRONG STUFF, WASN'T THAT ONE
OF THE DR. SEUSS BOOKS THAT GOT ‐‐ RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I'M GOING TO TELL MY KIDS THAT THIS INCIDENT IS HOW THE HOLIDAY
STARTED.
[ LAUGHTER ]
OUR IRISH‐AMERICAN PRESIDENT WENT TO MASS THIS MORNING AT
ST. PATRICK'S CHURCH IN WILMINGTON. HE ALSO SAT DOWN WITH
GEORGE STEPHANOPOULUS. JOE BIDEN SAID AMONG OTHER
THINGS THAT VLADIMIR PUTIN WILL "PAY A PRICE" FOR RUSSIA'S
INTERFERENCE IN OUR LAST TWO ELECTIONS. IT'S INTERESTING.
WHEN JOE BIDEN SAYS SOMEONE WILL PAY A PRICE, HE MEANS HE'LL
IMPOSE SANCTIONS OR FREEZE BANK ACCOUNTS.
WHEN PUTIN SAYS SOMEONE WILL PAY A PRICE, THEY'RE EATING A
PLUTONIUM‐AND‐CHEESE McMUFFIN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
THE DIRECTOR OF NATIONAL INTELLIGENCE ISSUED A REPORT
YESTERDAY THAT SAYS RUSSIA ACTIVELY WORKED TO MEDDLE IN OUR
ELECTION AGAIN. ACCORDING TO THE REPORT,
RUSSIA'S MISSION IN 2020 WAS "DENIGRATING PRESIDENT BIDEN'S
CANDIDACY AND THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY, SUPPORTING DONALD TRUMP,
UNDERMINING PUBLIC CONFIDENCE IN THE ELECTORAL PROCESS, AND
EXACERBATING SOCIOPOLITICAL DIVISIONS IN THE U. S."
WELL, NOT ACCORDING TO RUDY GIULIANI THEY DIDN'T.
[ LAUGHTER ]
WHO DO THEY THINK WE'RE GONNA BELIEVE, THESE NATIONAL
"INTELLIGENCE" CLOWNS OR AMERICA'S MAYOR?
[ LAUGHTER ]
A MAN WHO LOVES THIS COUNTRY SO MUCH, HE DYES HIS HAIR WITH
CHOCOLATE SYRUP, AND SHOUTS ABOUT ELECTION FRAUD FROM THE
ALLEY BEHIND A BUTTPLUG STORE!
[ LAUGHTER ]
I WAS THINKING ABOUT THAT TODAY. STILL CAN'T BELIEVE IT HAPPENED.
[ LAUGHTER ]
THE REPORT ALSO CONFIRMS THAT SOME OF TRUMP'S CLOSEST ALLIES
WERE DUPED INTO SHARING RUSSIAN DISINFORMATION.
I'M GUESSING ONE OF THOSE DUPES IS MIKE LINDELL.
THE MYPILLOW GUY WHO IS CURRENTLY ON THE RUN.
THE PILLOW MAN SAYS HE HAS BEEN AWAY FROM HOME FOR MONTHS MOVING
BETWEEN "UNDISCLOSED LOCATIONS" FOR FEAR OF UNNAMED ENEMIES.
>> ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU'RE LIVING IN AN UNDISCLOSED
LOCATION BECAUSE OF ‐‐
>> I ABSOLUTELY MOVE AROUND TO UNDISCLOSED ELECTIONS.
I CANCELED EVENTS, I DID A ZOOM CALL THE OTHER DAY.
I WAS GOING TO BE THERE IN PERSON BUT IT'S TOO RISKY.
I'M NOT GOING TO PUT OTHER PEOPLE IN JEOPARDY, OR MYSELF.
>> Jimmy: MIKE BELIEVES THAT A SOPHISTICATED CABAL OF DEEPSTATE
OPERATIVES RIGGED AN ELECTION BUT THEY CAN'T FIND THE SUPER
8 MOTEL WHERE HE'S BROADCASTING
[ LAUGHTER ]
HOW HARD COULD IT BE TO FIND MIKE LINDELL?
IF YOU SEE A GUY ON THE STREET AND THINK, "THAT GUY LOOKS LIKE
A CANADIAN SERIAL KILLER," IT'S PROBABLY HIM.
THE REASON LINDELL IS ON THE RUN IS BECAUSE HE "KNOWS TOO MUCH."
YOU MAY REMEMBER HE REPEATEDLY PROMISED TO RELEASE SHOCKING
INFORMATION THAT WOULD PROVE DONALD TRUMP WON THE ELECTION HE
DIDN'T WIN. ON DECEMBER 21st, LINDELL SAID
"WE HAVE ALL THE EVIDENCE! BIGGEST ELECTION FRAUD IN WORLD
HISTORY!" JANUARY 19th HE WROTE IN AN
EMAIL TO NBC, "CHINA AND OTHERS USED THE MACHINES TO CORRUPT OUR
ELECTION! HERE IS ONE PAGE OF THE PROOF."
THEN THERE WAS NOTHING ATTACHED TO THE EMAIL.
[ LAUGHTER ]
SO HE SENT ANOTHER EMAIL WITH AN EMPTY ATTACHMENT AND THEN A
THIRD EMAIL WITH A BUNCH OF SCREENSHOTS OF ILLEGIBLE TEXT.
FEBRUARY 2nd ON NEWSMAX, HE SAID "WE HAVE 100% PROOF."
FEBRUARY 4th HE SAID "IT'S ALL COMING OUT TOMORROW."
FEBRUARY 10th, AN INTERVIEW WITH STEVE BANNON.
HE SAYS, "I'M 100% WE HAVE ALL THE PROOF.
IT'S JUST COMING OUT NOW. I HAVE 100% PROOF."
FEBRUARY 22nd LINDELL TELLS "BUSINESS INSIDER" HE'S GOT A
MASSIVE TEAM OF LAWYERS AND ALL THE EVIDENCE NEEDED TO PROVE HIS
CASE. MARCH 5th HE SAID HE'S GOING TO
MAKE A COUPLE MORE DOCUMENTARIES TO SHOW ALL THE NEW EVIDENCE AND
"WHEN YOU SEE THIS, 100 PERCENT YOU'RE ALL IN."
[ LAUGHTER ]
AND HERE WE ARE ON MARCH 17th. MAYBE HE WAS THE CRACKHEAD IN
THE TREE. YOU KNOW?
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
IT WOULD ACTUALLY MAKE MORE SENSE.
OUR CRAZY EX‐PRESIDENT IS BACK AT IT.
LAST NIGHT, DONNY DIALED UP THE WELCOME MAT KNOWN AS
MARIA BARTIROMO FOR A 21 MINUTE LONG CHAT THAT COVERED
COVERED A VARIETY OF SUBJECTS INCLUDING WHETHER OR NOT THE
MAGA GANG SHOULD GET THE VACCINE.
>> WOULD YOU RECOMMEND TO OUR AUDIENCE THAT THEY GET THE
VACCINE, THEN?
>> I WOULD. I WOULD RECOMMEND IT.
AND I WOULD RECOMMEND IT TO A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT DON'T WANT TO
GET IT. AND A LOT OF THOSE PEOPLE VOTED
FOR ME, FRANKLY. BUT YOU KNOW, AGAIN, WE HAVE OUR
FREEDOMS AND WE HAVE TO LIVE BY THAT, AND I AGREE WITH THAT ALSO.
>> Jimmy: WELL. IT'S THAT KIND OF DECISIVENESS
THAT MADE HIM THE GREATEST PRESIDENT SINCE ABRAHAM LINCOLN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I CAN'T BELIEVE I VOTED FOR THAT GUY TWICE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
TRUMP ALSO TOOK SOME TIME TO CELEBRATE THE IMAGINARY WALL HE
NOW CLAIMS WAS ALMOST FINISHED.
>> WELL, MY POLICIES WERE WORKING BETTER THAN THEY'VE EVER
SEEN ON THE SOUTHERN BORDER. THE WALL IS ALMOST COMPLETE.
WE JUST HAD TO FIX LITTLE SECTIONS.
THEY COULD HAVE IT FINISHED IN A MONTH AND IT WOULD BE JUST
MAGNIFICENT. IT ALREADY IS MAGNIFICENT.
AND THEY SHOULD FINISH IT. BUT THEY'RE DESTROYING OUR
COUNTRY. THEY'RE COMING IN FROM YEMEN,
THEY'RE COMING IN FROM THE MIDDLE EAST, THEY'RE COMING IN
FROM EVERYWHERE, THEY'RE DROPPING THEM OFF AND THEY'RE
POURING INTO OUR COUNTRY. DISA DISGRACE, THEY'RE GOING TO
DESTROY OUR COUNTRY IF THEY DON'T DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
>> Jimmy: RIGHT, RIGHT. THEY'RE COMING IN THROUGH THE
LITTLE HOLES WE COULD HAVE FINISHED IN A MONTH FROM YEMEN.
DO YOU THINK HE KNOWS WE DON'T SHARE A BORDER WITH YEMEN?
[ LAUGHTER ]
HIS MAGA‐STY WEIGHED IN ON THE IMPORTANT SUBJECT OF MEGHAN
MARKLE.
>> I'M NOT A FAN OF HERS. I THINK THAT WHAT SHE TALKS
ABOUT THE ROYAL FAMILY AND THE QUEEN, I KNOW THE QUEEN, AS YOU
KNOW, I'VE MET WITH THE QUEEN. I THINK THE QUEEN IS A
TREMENDOUS PERSON AND I'M NOT A FAN OF MEGHAN.
>> Jimmy: RIGHT. MEGHAN MARKLE, MEGYN KELLY,
MEGAN McCAIN. THIS GUY'S GOT A PROBLEM WITH
MEGANS ACROSS THE BOARD!
[ LAUGHTER ]
HE'S "ING ME AMERICA GREAT AGAIN."
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
TRUMP ALSO BELIEVES THAT HE SHOULD BE GETTING MORE CREDIT
FOR THE VACCINE. IT'S DRIVING HIM NUTS THAT
JOE BIDEN IS GETTING THE VACCINE INTO PEOPLE'S BODIES.
TRUMP WANTS EVERYONE TO KNOW THAT THE HERO OF THIS STORY IS
HIM.
>> WE GOT A VACCINE DONE IN NINE MONTHS.
>> YES.
>> FORTUNATELY THAT'S NOT ONLY GOING TO SAVE OUR COUNTRY, IT'S
GOING TO SAVE THE WORLD. AND IT'S REALLY SAVING OUR
COUNTRY AND IT'S SAVING, FRANKLY, WORLD.
WHEN YOU ADD THE FACT THAT I WAS THE ONE AND THIS ADMINISTRATION
WAS THE ONE THAT CAME UP WITH THE VACCINE WHICH IS GOING TO
SAVE THE WORLD, OKAY?
>> Jimmy: WAIT. WEREN'T YOU THE ONE TELLING
EVERYONE TO DRINK BLEACH?
[ LAUGHTER ]
THAT WAS HIM, RIGHT? A RECENT POLL SHOWED THAT ALMOST
HALF OF TRUMP SUPPORTERS ARE EITHER HESITANT OR REFUSE TO GET
THE VACCINE, SO HEALTH EXPERTS INCLUDING DR. FAUCI HAVE BEEN
HOPEFUL THAT TRUMP WOULD GIVE IT AN ENDORSEMENT.
AND HE FINALLY DID THAT TODAY IN HIS OWN SPECIAL WAY.
♪
>> LAST YEAR, MY ADMINISTRATION LAUNCHED A VERY POWERFUL
"OPERATION WARP SPEED." IT WAS AN OPERATION LIKE
NOBODY'S EVER SEEN BEFORE. AND WE DEVELOPED A VACCINE.
A BEAUTIFUL ‐‐ YOU KNOW WHAT, ALMOST YOU COULD SAY MIRACLE.
I'M GOING TO SAY MIRACLE. VACCINE. AND WE DID IT.
JOE BIDEN DIDN'T DO IT. CRAZY NANCY DIDN'T DO IT.
TRUMP DID IT, OKAY? TRUMP DID IT.
NOW THEY WANT TO TAKE THE CREDIT AND WE CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN.
SO WE ALL NEED TO GO AND GET THAT TRUMP SHOT.
I CALL IT THE TRUMP SHOT. MANY PEOPLE ARE CALLING IT THAT,
THE TRUMP SHOT. THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY.
WE NEED TO GET IT RIGHT AWAY AND STAY WELL.
SO WE CAN FIGHT FOR AMERICA AND FIGHT FOR ALL THAT ‐‐ YOU KNOW
WHAT, TO TAKE THINGS BACK, TAKE THINGS BACK, THEY VERY MUCH NEED
TO BE TAKEN BACK BECAUSE THEY'RE VERY BAD RIGHT NOW, AND MAYBE
WORSE, MAYBE THEY'RE WORSE THAN BAD. WE'VE NEVER SEEN THINGS THIS
BAD, FRANKLY. EVEN THOUGH WE HAVE THE
BEAUTIFUL TRUMP VACCINE, WHICH IS JUST INCREDIBLE.
SO DON'T LET SHEEPY JOE GIVE THE SHOT I GAVE YOU TO ILLEGAL
IMMIGRANTS, BAD HOMBRES IN CARAVANS CROSSING OUR BORDERS
WITH WINDMILLS FROM ANTIFA. GO ON DOWN AND GET THAT
BEAUTIFUL VACCINE. IT'S SO SAFE. IT'S THE MOST SAFE.
THEY SAY IT'S THE SAFEST VACCINE SINCE ABRAHAM LINCOLN, VUK
IMAM IF YOU CAN IMAGINE THAT. GET THAT VACCINE, BREAK IN IF
YOU HAVE TO ‐‐ I CAN'T SAY THAT, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, BREAK IN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
LET THEM KNOW TRUMP SENT YOU.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, YOU HEARD HIM.
SPREAD IT AROUND ON FACEBOOK. WE'VE BEEN COMBING THROUGH OUR
CORONA ARCHIVES AS WE MARK ONE YEAR IN CAPTIVITY.
WE'VE BEEN LOOKING BACK AT WHAT WAS IN THE NEWS THIS WEEK A YEAR
AGO, AND WE'VE CLEVERLY TITLED IT "THIS WEEK IN COVID HISTORY."
>> THIS WEEK IN COVID HISTORY, IT'S THE SECOND HALF OF MARCH
2020. STREETS ARE QUIET. EXCEPT FOR THE SOUND OF DRIVE‐BY
BIRTHDAY PARTIES. THE NEWEST CRAZE.
ALONG WITH OVATIONS FOR HOSPITAL WORKERS.
TWO THINGS WE ABSOLUTELY WILL NEVER STOP DOING.
SAY, MOVE OVER LGBT, THERE'S A NEW IDENTITY, CUOMOSEXUAL, A NEW
TERM FOR EMPIRE STATE GOVERNOR ANDREW CUOMO, AMERICA'S FAVORITE
FELLA.
>> RELEASE THE VENTILATORS TO NEW YORK.
>> THIS SEXY FELLA WON'T TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER.
DOWN FLORIDA WAY, SPRING BREAK IS SPRINGING.
>> IF I GET CORONA, I GET CORONA.
AT THE END OF THE DAY, I'M NOT GOING TO LET IT STOP ME FROM
PARTYING.
>> SPEAKING OF DUMB‐DUMBS, CONGRESSMAN DEVIN NUNES.
>> IT'S A GREAT TIME TO GO TO A LOCAL RESTAURANT, YOU CAN GET IN
EASILY.
>> MM, CORONA‐APPETITE! BACK TO WASHINGTON, D. C.
>> WHAT DO YOU SAY TO AMERICANS WHO ARE WATCHING YOU WHO ARE
SCARED?
>> I SAY THAT YOU'RE A TERRIBLE REPORTER, THAT'S WHAT I SAY.
>> YOU TELL HIM! WHEN WILL THINGS GET BACK TO
NORMAL?
>> EASTER SUNDAY, YOU'LL HAVE PACKED CHURCHES ALL OVER OUR
COUNTRY. I THINK IT WOULD BE A BEAUTIFUL
TIME. AND IT'S JUST ABOUT THE TIMELINE
THAT I THINK IS RIGHT.
>> BY GUM, AMERICA THAT IS NEVER BEEN IN SAFER OR SMALLER HANDS.
THIS HAS BEEN "THIS WEEK IN COVID HISTORY."
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: HE DIDN'T SAY WHICH EASTER SUNDAY.
WE'VE GOT A GREEN AND DRUNKEN SHOW FOR YOU TONIGHT.
EDGAR RAMIREZ IS WITH US.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
WE HAVE MUSIC FROM TUNE‐YARDS. AND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
ANTHONY MACKIE.
>> Jimmy: TONIGHT, FROM THE NEW MOVIE "YES DAY," EDGAR RAMIREZ.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
THEN, LATER, FROM OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA, THIS IS SOME
PERFORMANCE. YOU HAVE NOT SEEN ANYTHING LIKE
THIS. THE ALBUM IS CALLED "SKETCHY."
MUSIC FROM TUNE‐YARDS.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
TOMORROW NIGHT LIONEL RICHIE AND JEFFREY DEAN MORGAN WILL JOIN US
WITH MUSIC FROM CHESS‐KA FEATURING DE LA GHETTO AND
OFFSET. PLEASE JOIN US FOR THAT. OUR FIRST GUEST IS A VERY
TALENTED MAN WHO CO‐STARS ALONGSIDE SEBASTIAN STAN ON THE
NEW MARVEL SERIES WE'LL ALL BE TALKING ABOUT ALL THE TIME.
"THE FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLDIER" PREMIERES FRIDAY ON
DISNEY PLUS. FROM THE BIG EASY, PLEASE
WELCOME ANTHONY MACKIE!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> WHAT'S UP, MAN? GOOD TO SEE YOU.
>> Jimmy: GOOD TO SEE YOU. I HOPE YOU'RE OKAY.
I HEARD THERE'S A TORNADO WARNING DOWN THERE, HUH?
>> NAH. THAT'S EAST OF HERE. WE'RE FINE.
>> Jimmy: OKAY, GOOD, ALL RIGHT, GOOD.
[ LAUGHTER ]
LOOKS LIKE YOU TOOK THE SHEETS OFF YOUR BED AND HUNG THEM UP
BEHIND YOU.
>> OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, THEY'RE EGYPTIAN COTTON.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: OKAY.
>> I GOT THEM AT THE CHRISTMAS SALE AT MACY'S ON DECK.
VERY NICE. MARTHA STEWART COLLECTION,
THAT'S WHAT I DO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: WHATEVER THEY ARE, THEY LOOK GREAT.
>> THANK YOU, SIR. 2,000 COUNT, I DON'T KNOW,
2,000 ‐‐ THEY COUNTING, THEY COUNTING.
>> Jimmy: THREAD COUNT YEAH. IS ST. PATRICK'S DAY A BIG THING
IN NEW ORLEANS OR IS EVERYBODY TOO HUNG OVER FROM MARDI GRAS TO
CELEBRATE IT?
>> HERE, EVERY DAY IS ST. PATRICK'S DAY, EVERYONE PUT ON
GREEN. BUT WE HAVE A PLACE CALLED THE
IRISH CHANNEL, WHICH IS AN AREA IN NEW ORLEANS WHERE ALL THE
IRISH PEOPLE MIGRATED AND LIVED.
>> Jimmy: REALLY?
>> IT'S A PRETTY BIG DEAL. BUT THE REST OF US, NOT SO MUCH.
>> Jimmy: I DON'T THINK THEY'RE THAT KEEN ON IT IN IRELAND,
REALLY. I DON'T KNOW, MY PARENTS WERE
OVER THERE AND THEY SAID, YEAH, THEY'RE LIKE, YEAH, OKAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I WILL TELL YOU, I DID SPEND ONE ST. PATRICK'S DAY IN DUBLIN,
WHICH IF YOU DON'T KNOW IS IN IRELAND.
>> Jimmy: OH, YES.
[ LAUGHTER ]
SO I'VE HEARD.
>> YEAH, YEAH, YES. IT WAS A GREAT EXPERIENCE.
AND I WENT TO THE TIERGARTEN AND MET A REAL LEPRECHAUN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: A REAL LEPRECHAUN?
>> YES. I WENT TO THIS BAR CALLED THE
DUBLINER. THE BARTENDER SAID, COME
OUTSIDE, I WANT YOU TO MEET MY FRIEND.
THIS HAS TO BE THE FIRST TIME THERE'S A BLACK DUDE AND A
LEPRECHAUN IN THE SAME PLACE AT THE SAME TIME.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: WELL, APPARENTLY YOU'VE NOT BEEN TO MOBILE,
ALABAMA.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]
YOU MET THE LEPRECHAUN? WAS IT NIGHTTIME OR DAYTIME?
>> NO, IT WAS DAYTIME.
>> Jimmy: IT WAS DAYTIME.
>> THEY CELEBRATE ST. PATRICK'S DAY DURING THE DAY SO THAT YOU
CAN SLEEP IT OFF. BECAUSE IT'S SUCH A ‐‐ IT'S
EARLY FESTIVITIES, AS THEY CALL THEM.
>> Jimmy: RIGHT. AND ALSO WITH THEIR ‐‐ YOU CAN'T
HAVE A RAINBOW AT NIGHT, SO THERE'S NOTHING FOR THE
LEPRECHAUN TO HIDE AT THE END OF.
>> THERE'S NO WAY FOR HIM TO FIND HIS WAY HOME.
[ LAUGHTER ]
LIKE YOU CAN'T FIND YOUR WAY HOME AT NIGHT BECAUSE THERE'S ‐‐
I MEAN, IT'S ABOUT LIGHT REFLECTION.
YOU HAVE TO FIND YOUR RAINBOW? I WONDER WHAT YOU DID WHEN YOU
MET THE LEPRECHAUN. YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO CATCH HIM.
YOU'LL BE AUTOMATICALLY RICH IF YOU DO. IF YOU TRY TO GRAB HIM?
>> WELL, HE RAN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I TRIED TO CATCH HIM. BUT IT WAS A CROWDED AREA.
SO IT WAS JUST A ‐‐ PICTURE A BLACK DUDE CHASING A LEPRECHAUN
IN DUBLIN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I AM TRYING TO PICTURE THAT. YES. IT'S ENTERTAINING.
YOU STILL OWN A BAR IN NEW YORK? YOU HAD YOUR OWN PLACE?
>> YEAH, A BAR CALLED "NO BAR," NO.
>> Jimmy: NOBAR, NEW ORLEANS BAR.
>> THAT'S GOOD, THAT GUY'S GOOD.
>> Jimmy: IS THAT PLACE ‐‐ YOU WERE LIKE AN UP AND COMING ACTOR
AT THAT TIME. YOU WERE KIND OF ‐‐ YOU HADN'T
MADE IT YET. AND YOU, AS I RECALL ‐‐ I THINK
YOU TOLD ME ONCE BEFORE, YOU BUILT THAT PLACE YOURSELF?
>> YEAH.
I WAS DOING THEATER IN SPOKANE. THEY WERE UNLOADING A SHOW, A
SHOW CALLED "RED." AND I WENT TO THE CONSTRUCTION
GUYS, LIKE YO WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH ALL THIS WOOD?
THEY'RE LIKE, THROWING IT AWAY. AND I SAID, CAN I HAVE IT?
I WENT TO U‐HAUL, GOT A TRUCK ‐‐ U‐HAUL, LOWER YOUR PRICES.
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ APPLAUSE ]
GOT ALL THIS WOOD. AND OVER THREE MONTHS, I BUILT
MY OWN BAR. BECAUSE I COULDN'T AFFORD TO PAY
ANYBODY TO BUILD IT.
>> Jimmy: AND YOU'RE GOOD WITH YOUR HANDS, I ASSUME?
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, NOT TRYING TO BRAG. BUT THEY CALL ME "HANDSY."
I'M VERY GOOD WITH MY HANDS.
>> Jimmy: WHAT KIND OF CLIENTELE DID YOU HAVE AT THAT BAR?
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, BROOKLYN WAS ‐‐ IT WAS A VERY ECLECTIC,
LOCAL ‐‐ BROOKLYN IS A NEIGHBORHOOD.
NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE IN BROOKLYN, IT'S A NEIGHBORHOOD.
I WAS IN CROWN HEIGHTS. SO IT WAS ‐‐ WE HAD HIPSTERS, WE
HAD ARTISTS, WE HAD MILLIONAIRES. MONEY GUYS.
WE HAD EVERYBODY UP IN THERE.
>> Jimmy: DID YOU HAVE REGULAR CUSTOMERS THAT YOU GOT TO KNOW?
>> WE DID. WE DID, AND A BUNCH OF OUR
DRINKS ON OUR MENU WAS NAMED AFTER OUR REGULARS.
>> Jimmy: OH, WOW.
>> SO PEOPLE WOULD COME IN AND SAY, "GIVE ME THIS."
AFTER ABOUT FIVE OR SIX TIMES WE WOULD PUT THEIR DRINK ON THE
MENU.
>> Jimmy: OH, REALLY, HOW ABOUT THAT. WHAT WAS THE BEST ONE?
WHAT WAS THE MOST NOTABLE ON THE MENU, CUSTOMER‐WISE?
>> THERE WAS A LADY, AND I HOPE SHE'S WATCHING THIS.
I LOVE YOU, I MISS YOU, I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU. MISS MABEL.
VERY SUCCESSFUL LADY IN THE MANHATTAN SECTOR OF BUSINESS.
AND SHE WOULD COME IN. THIS IS THE CRAZIEST DRINK.
YOU HAVE TO TRUST ME. MAKE THIS FOR YOUR LADY.
50% OF THE TIME IT WORKS 75% OF THE TIME.
[ LAUGHTER ]
CALLED THE MISS MABEL. SHE WOULD GET A CLASS OF MESCATO
AND A SHOT OF COCONUT CIROC.
>> Jimmy: WHAT?
>> IF YOU KNOW, MESCATO IS SUGAR, COCONUT CHIRAC IS SUGAR.
SHE WOULD PUT THIS SHOT IN THE GLASS OF WINE.
BY THE TIME SHE HAD HER SECOND ONE, ALL BETS WERE OFF.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, ALL BETS WERE OFF?
SHE WOULD GET HAMMERED?
>> WELL, SHE WOULD GET ‐‐ FRISKY.
>> Jimmy: OH.
>> SHE WAS THE BAR COUGAR.
>> Jimmy: OH!
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> HER WHOLE THING WAS, EVERY FRIDAY SHE WOULD COME IN AFTER
WORK, AND YOU KNOW, SHE WOULD, YOU KNOW ‐‐ A LONG WEEK OF WORK.
SO SHE WANTED TO HAVE SOMEBODY TO TALK TO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: UH‐HUH. DID YOU EVER "TALK" TO HER?
>> NO, NO, I WAS MAKING THE DRINKS.
WHENEVER SHE CAME IN IT WAS MY JOB TO GO BEHIND THE BAR AND
MAKE HER DRINKS. BECAUSE I WAS A CRAPPY BARTENDER
SO I LITERALLY BUILT A BAR JUST SO I COULD BE A BARTENDER.
BECAUSE I WOULDN'T FIRE MYSELF.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: ANTHONY MACKIE IS WITH US.
WHEN WE COME BACK WE'RE GOING TO SEE A NEVER BEFORE SEEN, OTHER
THAN THE PEOPLE WHO MADE IT, NEVER BEFORE SEEN BY US CLIP
FROM "THE FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLDIER." WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
♪
>>> RED WING! GET UP!
♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: THAT'S ANTHONY MACKIE IN "THE FALCON AND THE WINTER
SOLDIER." THAT IS SO GOOD. THE SHOW IS SO GOOD.
I GOT TO SEE THE FIRST EPISODE. BOY.
MARVEL DOES EVERYTHING SO WELL, DON'T THEY?
>> OH, DEFINITELY. NOBODY TALKS ABOUT I DROPPED A
DUDE INTO THE GRAND CANYON ON THE CLIP.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YOU KILLED HIM, I DID NOTICE THAT.
I DON'T WANT TO GIVE ANYTHING AWAY BUT THE FALCON DOESN'T SEEM
TO HAVE ANY HESITATION ABOUT KILLING PEOPLE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> THAT'S MY JOB, I'M FROM NEW ORLEANS. THAT'S WHAT WE DO.
BANG BANG BANG!
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I WAS WATCHING THINKING, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS
IS A TELEVISION SHOW. AND IT IS A TELEVISION SHOW.
BECAUSE YOU'RE YOUNGER THAN I AM, BUT WHEN I WAS A KID, I JUST
WANT TO REMIND AMERICA OF THE SUPERHERO TELEVISION SHOWS WE
HAD WHEN I WAS A KID.
♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: YEAH. "THE GREATEST AMERICAN HERO."
NOT SO GREAT BY COMPARISON.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I VENTURE TO SAY, BEFORE THE AMAZING CGI TEAM GETS AHOLD OF
OUR FOOTAGE, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I LOOK LIKE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: DID YOU AND YOUR COSTAR, SEBASTIAN STAN, DID YOU
KNOW WHEN YOU WERE SHOOTING AROUND THE TIME OF "AV"AVENGERS
END GAME"" THAT YOU'D BE DOING THIS TV SHOW TOGETHER?
>> NO. WE GOT A CALL FROM THE POWERS
THAT BE TO COME TO L. A. A FEW MONTHS AFTER "END GAME" CAME OU
THEY WANTED TO MEET WITH US AND TELL US WHAT THE NEXT PHASE OF
THE MCU WAS GOING TO BE. SO WE WENT OUT TO L. A. AND WE
HAD OUR RESPECTIVE MEETINGS.
>> Jimmy: OH, SEPARATELY, HUH?
>> YEAH. EVERYBODY HAS THEIR MEETINGS
SEPARATE.
>> Jimmy: OH.
>> WE WENT IN ‐‐ YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE A APPLYING FOR A JOB.
YOU GO IN, EVERYBODY'S SITTING IN THE LOBBY, YOU'RE LIKE, OH,
BOY, WHO'S GOING TO GET FIRED?
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YOU GOT THE OPPOSITE OF FIRED.
YOU HAD TO KNOW SOMETHING WAS UP BECAUSE CAPTAIN AMERICA IS NOT
GOING TO GIVE YOU YOUR SHIELD SO YOU CAN GO HOME AND NEVER BE
SEEN AGAIN.
>> THIS IS THE THING. IF YOU LOOK AT "END GAME," CAP
GAVE SAM WILSON A SHIELD AND SAM GAVE IT BACK.
HE REFUSED THE SHOO ELD. HE SAID ‐‐ THE LINES WERE "IT
FEELS LIKE IT'S SOMEONE ELSE'S, IT FEELS LIKE IT'S YOURS."
HE NEVER ACCEPTED THE SHIELD. I COULD HAVE EASILY BEEN FIRED.
>> Jimmy: I SEE. BUT YOU WILL ACCEPT THE SHIELD
EVENTUALLY, YES?
>> AT ANY POINT IN TIME KEVIN CAN REPLACE ME WITH 50 CENT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I'M WAITING TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS.
>> Jimmy: HEY, SINCE IT IS ST. PATRICK'S DAY AND WE ARE NOT
ALLOWED TO GO OUT, YOU KINDLY OFFERED TO SHOW US HOW TO MAKE
ONE OF YOUR SIGNATURE DRINKS YOU USED TO MAKE AT THE BAR.
GUILLERMO HAS THE INGREDIENTS. I ASSUME YOU HAVE THE
INGREDIENTS THERE? OR ARE YOU JUST GOING TO TALK US
THROUGH IT?
>> HEY, GUILLERMO?
>> Guillermo: HEY, HOW ARE YOU, MAN?
>> WHAT'S UP, BABY?
>> Guillermo: I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE NEW ORLEANS.
>> YOU'RE SHINING LIKE NEW MONEY, I SEE YOU.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I HAVE A TRAY. NOT TO BE OUTDONE BY GUILLERMO.
>> Jimmy: UH‐HUH? OKAY?
>> I PUT TOGETHER A TRAY.
>> Jimmy: GREAT.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> SEE THAT? GUILLERMO‐STYLE.
>> Jimmy: OKAY.
>> Guillermo: OKAY.
>> SO I ‐‐ I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU
HOW TO MAKE A MEXICAN MOJITO.
>> Jimmy: PERFECT, YOU'RE MEXICAN, RIGHT?
>> Guillermo: YES, LET'S SEE THAT, I WANT TO SEE THAT, OKAY?
>> OKAY. SO WHAT YOU DO IS, I LIKE MINE
WITH MEZCAL. I GOT A NICE MEZCAL HERE.
SO 2 OUNCES OF MEZCAL.
>> Jimmy: OKAY.
>> A NICE, GENEROUS POUR.
>> Jimmy: YOU'RE NOT MAKING ME ONE, I GUESS?
>> Guillermo: OH, OH YEAH, SORRY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> TWO STRAWS, Y'ALL CAN SHARE, IT'S ON "LADY AND THE TRAMP."
I'M NOT GOING TO SAY WHICH ONE IS THE TRAMP.
>> Guillermo: ALL RIGHT.
>> SO THEN YOU GET YOU A NICE GINGER BEER.
1.5 OUNCES OF GINGER BEER ON 2 OUNCES OF TEQUILA.
>> Guillermo: YOU KNOW WHAT THIS.
>> OH, HE'S FREE POURING, OKAY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: HE'S A PROFESSIONAL, ANTHONY.
>> EXACTLY. NOT HIS FIRST ST. PADDY'S.
>> Guillermo: YEAH.
>> .75 OUNCES OF LIME JUICE.
>> Guillermo: WAIT, HOLD ON.
>> Jimmy: SPLIT THAT IN HALF, YEAH, GREAT.
>> Guillermo: OKAY.
>> 1 OUNCE OF SODA WATER.
>> Jimmy: OKAY, I'LL DO THAT ONE. 1 OUNCE EXACTLY.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> 1.5 OUNCES OF SIMPLE SYRUP.
>> Jimmy: OH.
>> DEPENDS HOW SWEET YOU WANT IT TO BE.
I LIKE MINE SWEET, I'M NOT TRYING TO BRAG.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: THAT'S SIMPLE SYRUP, OKAY, GREAT, ALL RIGHT.
>> YOU HAVE MINT THERE, RIGHT?
>> Guillermo: YES, I DO.
>> ALL RIGHT. NOW THIS IS WHAT I WANT TO TEACH
YOU, GUILLERMO. THIS IS HOW IT GETS REAL.
A LOT OF PEOPLE MUDDLE THEIR MINT. I DON'T MUDDLE MY MINT.
>> Jimmy: THIS IS BASIL, BY THE WAY, I'M JUST GOING TO POINT OUT.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: THIS IS NOT MINT, THIS IS BASIL.
>> SAME THING, SAME THING, DIFFERENT TREE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
TAKE YOUR MINT. YOU DON'T HAVE TO MUDDLE IT BUT
TREAT IT LIKE YOU LOVE IT. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DO TO IT?
>> Jimmy: QUESTION OF ATE SMACK.
>> TILL YOU CAN SMELL IT ON YOUR HANDS. SMELL THAT?
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT.
>> YOU PUT IT IN THERE, WAVE IT AROUND, MAKE IT SEXY.
>> Jimmy: OKAY.
>> OKAY?
>> Jimmy: OKAY.
>> I WANT YOU TO TRY THAT. THAT'S CALLED THE MEXI‐MACKIE
MOJITO.
>> Jimmy: WE DON'T PUT THE REST OF THE STUFF IN, CUCUMBERS AND
STUFF?
>> NO, Y'ALL BOUGHT TOO MUCH STUFF.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YOU KNOW WHAT? IT'S VERY NICE. IT IS.
>> IT'S REFRESHING.
>> Jimmy: IT IS REFRESHING. WELL, THANK YOU, ANTHONY MACKIE.
AND HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY TO YOU. "THE FALCON AND THE WINTER
SOLDIER" PREMIERES FRIDAY ON DISNEY PLUS. THANKS AGAIN.
WE'LL BE BACK WITH EDGAR RAMIREZ!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪
>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK. MUSIC FROM TUNE‐YARDS IS ON THE
WAY. YOU KNOW OUR NEXT GUEST AS GIANNI VERSACE ON "AMERICAN
CRIME STORY," AND FROM HBO HE WAS THE COP WHO WAS TRYING TO
UNDO WHAT HUGH GRANT DID ON "THE UNDOING." NOW HE TEAMS WITH
JENNIFER GARNER FOR THE NEW MOVIE "YES DAY," IT IS ON
NETFLIX NOW.
PLEASE WELCOME EDGAR RAMIREZ.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪
>> Jimmy: GOOD TO SEE YOU, HOW YOU DOING?
>> VERY WELL, VERY WELL, VERY HAPPY. OH MY GOSH, PEOPLE.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: YOU WERE GREAT ON "THE UNDOING."
>> THANK YOU.
>> Jimmy: I ENJOYED YOUR WORK ON THAT SHOW.
>> THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: HOW HAVE YOU BEEN, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN DOING THIS
COVID TIME?
>> WELL, THE FIRST PART I WAS HERE IN L. A.
HUNKERING DOWN HERE. AND THEN FOR CHRISTMAS I WENT TO
MY FRIEND'S HOUSE, JUST GOT THIS BEAUTIFUL HOUSE IN THE ROCKY
MOUNTAINS. I'VE BEEN CROSSING, GOING ACROSS
THE ROCKY MOUNTAINS.
>> Jimmy: HAD YOU BEEN THERE BEFORE, THE ROCKIES?
>> NO, NEVER. I WAS SUPPOSED TO STAY FOR A
WEEK AND IT'S BEEN THREE MONTHS.
>> Jimmy: THREE MONTHS IN THE ROCKY MOUNTAINS?
>> YEAH. I'M STILL THERE, ACTUALLY.
I'M GOING BACK.
>> Jimmy: DID THEY INVITE YOU TO STAY FOR THREE MONTHS?
>> NO, NO, NO.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I MEAN, IF YOU EVER INVITE ME, BE CAREFUL.
BE CAREFUL DIF YOU INVITE ME OVER, I MIGHT DAY, I'M THIS GUY.
>> Jimmy: WHAT'S THE ARRANGEMENT?
HOW MANY IN THE HOUSE?
>> WE WERE ‐‐ FOR NEW YEAR'S, WE WERE FIVE. AND NOW IT'S THREE.
ALMOST LIKE THE WORST REALITY SHOW YOU CAN IMAGINE.
[ LAUGHTER ]
IT'S ‐‐ YEAH BECAUSE WE STARTED FIVE, THEN TWO LEFT.
THEN THREE STAYED. AND IT'S BEEN ‐‐ IT'S BEEN, YOU
KNOW, THREE GUYS. EVERYONE'S VENEZUELAN.
>> Jimmy: OH.
>> IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOUNTAINS, A LOT OF SNOW.
SO IT'S CARIBBEAN PEOPLE DEALING WITH THE ELEMENTS AND SNOW.
>> Jimmy: OH, YOU'VE NEVER HAD TO LIVE IN SNOW BEFORE.
>> NO, NO. FOR EXAMPLE, YOU KNOW YOU USED
TO ‐‐ I REMEMBER ‐‐ I MEAN, WE SAW IT GROWING UP, I SAW SNOW ON
AMERICAN MOVIES, YOU KNOW? SO BASICALLY IT'S LIKE, YOU
KNOW ‐‐ THEN IT STARTED TO SNOW AND YOU'RE OUT THE WINDOW, OH,
IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL. CUT TO A MONTH AFTER.
IT'S SNOWING, LIKE GET THE CAR OUT OF THE DRIVEWAY, PUT ON IT
THE ROAD, IT'S GOING TO GET STUCK!
>> Jimmy: YEAH, THERE'S SOMETHING EVERY DAY.
>> THE MUD ROOM. THE MUD ROOM IS THE MOST
IMPORTANT ROOM.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: THE MUD ROOM IS IMPORTANT.
>> IN VENEZUELA WE HAVE ALL TYPE OF ROOMS BUT NOT A MUD ROOM.
[ LAUGHTER ]
IN L. A. IT'S BASICALLY NOT A PRIORITY.
>> Jimmy: HOW OLD WERE YOU THE FIRST TIME YOU SAW SNOW?
>> I THINK I WAS ‐‐ I WAS 16.
>> Jimmy: OH, OKAY, ALL RIGHT.
>> I WAS 16.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S REASONABLE, YEAH.
AND ARE YOU GUYS LIKE SPLITTING UP THE DUTIES OF THE HOUSE?
HOW'S IT WORKING?
>> WELL, ABSOLUTELY, ABSOLUTELY. YOU HAVE TO.
WE DO EVERYTHING, YOU KNOW. IT'S BEEN ‐‐ AGAIN, IT'S LIKE
THE WORST REALITY SHOW YOU CAN EVER IMAGINE.
SO BASICALLY I DO THE TIDYING OR I TRY.
>> Jimmy: OKAY.
>> IT'S A NEW HOUSE SO EVERYTHING'S BEEN COMING.
BOXES, BOXES. SO I USE THE BOXES, I REUSE THEM
TO TRY TO PUT THE GLOVES AND ALL THE PIECES WE NEED, NOBODY
LISTENS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: OH, REALLY?
>> WE'RE FROM VENEZUELA, SO THEN THIS OTHER FRIEND WHO'S THE
OWNER OF THE HOUSE, A GREAT COOK, HIS MOTHER IS FROM SPAIN.
SO HE COOKS EVERYTHING WITH OLIVE OIL.
>> Jimmy: NICE.
>> BASICALLY RUN THE HOUSE OF ‐‐ YOU KNOW, IT RUNS ON PROPANE AND
OLIVE OIL.
[ LAUGHTER ]
IT'S ESSENTIAL. AND THIS OTHER FRIEND, THIS
OTHER GUY, ACTUALLY, HE'S THE ONE THAT TAKES THE CAKE.
HE'S THE ONE THAT CLEANS THE BATHROOMS.
>> Jimmy: OH, THAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT GUY.
>> YOU KNOW, LIKE THE KNIFE IN HIS TEETH.
>> Jimmy: A KNIFE?
>> YEAH, HE GOES AT IT. YOU HAVE TO, THREE GUYS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
TWO BATHROOMS, YOU KNOW? YOU NEED ‐‐ I MEAN, YOU NEED A
CERTAIN PERSONALITY.
>> Jimmy: YOU NEED A KNIFE TO CLEAN THE TOILET, THAT'S WHEN
YOU START TO QUESTION THE CHEF.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> THERE YOU GO. AND I REALLY HOPE HE'S WATCHING.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I MEAN, I HOPE THERE'S ELECTRICITY TODAY.
>> Jimmy: YOU'VE GOT TO BRING HIM OLIVE OIL, HE'LL BE HAPPY.
>> ABSOLUTELY, IF YOU DON'T BRING OLIVE OIL EVERY TIME WE GO
TO THE NEAREST TOWN, THEN ‐‐
>> Jimmy: THERE'S TROUBLE.
>> YEAH, THINGS GO DOWN.
>> Jimmy: OH, YEAH. THIS MOVIE HAS AN INTERESTING
PREMISE. THE IDEA OF THE MOVIE IS WHAT?
TELL US.
>> IT'S ABOUT CHOOSING ONE DAY IN THE NOT SO DISTANT FUTURE
WHERE YOU SAY TO YOUR KIDS "YES" TO EVERYTHING THEY WANT.
>> Jimmy: YEAH. THAT IS TERRIFYING.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> I ALWAYS GET THAT, BUT NO. ACTUALLY, IT'S GREAT.
BECAUSE THEN THE RULES MAKE MORE SENSE.
AND OF COURSE YOU HAVE TO SET UP RULES.
IT'S NOT THAT, YOU KNOW ‐‐ I MEAN, THERE IS A GEOGRAPHICAL,
YOU KNOW ‐‐
>> Jimmy: YOU CAN'T SAY, "LET'S GO TO THE MOON."
>> RIGHT, EXACTLY. THEY WOULD SAY THINGS LIKE THAT,
BUT IT'S NOT LIKE THAT. IT'S NOT ABOUT MONEY, IT'S NOT
ABOUT SPENDING. IT'S ABOUT CREATING ACTIVITIES
WHERE YOU JUST HELP THE TENSION. AND IT'S ‐‐ THERE IS A CERTAIN
IMBALANCE OR TENSIONS CREATED BY THE EVERYDAY LIFE.
SO THE "YES DAY" IS TO EASE ALL THAT.
>> Jimmy: YES.
>> NOT ONLY PARENTS TO CHILDREN, IT'S IN ANY RELATIONSHIP THAT IS
MEANINGFUL TO YOU. YOU CAN HAVE A "YES DAY."
YOU COULD GIVE GUILLERMO A "YES DAY."
>> Jimmy: WE CALL IT "SI DAY."
>> YOU SHOULD GIVE EACH OTHER A "YES DAY."
>> Jimmy: EVERY DAY WITH GUILLERMO IS A "YES DAY."
>> Guillermo: EVEN IN MY HOUSE, LAUNDRY. "YES."
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS. IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE FUN.
WHAT WAS FOR YOU THE MOST FUN "YES" THING?
>> I WOULD SAY THE ICE CREAM.
>> Jimmy: EATING AS MUCH ICE CREAM, ONE OF THOSE CONTESTS
WHERE YOU HAVE TO EAT THE WHOLE DEAL.
>> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: AND THERE YOU ARE EATING ICE CREAM, DRESSED BY
YOUR CHILDREN.
[ LAUGHTER ]
HOW MUCH ICE CREAM DID YOU ACTUALLY EAT?
>> YOU SEE HOW FOCUSED I AM IN THAT PICTURE?
>> Jimmy: YOU ARE VERY FOCUSED. ICE CREAM EATER. A PROFESSIONAL ‐
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.
>> YEAH, SINCE I WAS A KID, I'VE BEEN PRACTICING FOR 35 YEARS.
>> Jimmy: DO YOU THINK THAT'S BECAUSE YOU NEVER HAD SNOW?
TRYING TO FILL SOME VOID?
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> HM. THAT'S INTERESTING. YOU SEE, YOU'RE ALWAYS ‐‐ YEAH,
EXACTLY. MAYBE. MAYBE.
>> Jimmy: MAYBE. HOW MUCH ICE CREAM DID YOU EAT
THAT DAY? I ATE A LOT. I WOULDN'T ADVISE ANYONE TO EAT
THAT AMOUNT OF ICE CREAM. BUT I'M A PROFESSIONAL.
I MEAN, I'VE BEEN DOING IT, AS I SAID, THE LAST 35 YEARS.
AND IT WAS ALL ME. IT WAS NO STUNT DOUBLE, NOTHING,
IT WAS ME.
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: ALL YOU. I KNOW YOU'VE LIVED ALL OVER THE
WORLD. WHAT'S THE BEST ICE CREAM EXPERIENCE YOU'VE EVER HAD IN
YOUR LIFE, THE BEST CONE OR SUNDAE OR WHATEVER IT WAS?
WHAT WAS IT?
>> THAT IS HARD TO TELL. I'VE BEEN VERY DEDICATED.
>> FOR ME IT WAS GELATO IN ITALY, THE FIRST TIME I WENT
THERE, HAVING IT FROM THE STREET.
>> THAT'S THE GREAT THING ABOUT ITALY, YOU HAVE ONE EVERY CORNER.
>> Jimmy: YES, RIGHT.
>> EVERY CORNER YOU HAVE A JELATERIA, IT'S FANTASTIC.
I LOVE ICE CREAM WITH A LOT OF CHUNKY STUFF.
YOU KNOW, IF IT DOESN'T HAVE IT, THEN I TAKE A COOKIE AND I
JUST ‐‐ YOU KNOW, I CRUMBLE IT.
>> Jimmy: I'M UNDERSTANDING WHY YOUR FRIEND HAS THE KNIFE NOW.
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> YOU GOT ME THERE, YEAH. I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT, YEAH.
>> Jimmy: WELL, IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU.
>> THANK YOU.
>> Jimmy: THE MOVIE IS CALLED "YES DAY."
YOU'RE GOING TO BE HEARING A LOT ABOUT IT FROM YOUR CHILDREN.
IT'S ON NETFLIX NOW. EDGAR RAMIREZ! THANK YOU, EDGAR.
BE RIGHT BACK WITH TUNE‐YARDS.
>> Dicky: THE "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" CONCERT SERIES IS
PRESENTED BY MERCEDES‐BENZ. THE BEST OR NOTHING.
>> Jimmy: THE ALBUM IS CALLED "SKETCHY," IT'S OUT MARCH 26th.
WITH THE SONG "HYPNOTIZED," TUNE‐YARDS!
♪ THE TREES ARE
IN THE MEADOW
THE COWS ARE IN THE TREES THE PEOPLE AREN'T ♪
♪ ANYWHERE TO BE FOUND
BETTER TAKE ONE OF THESE
GOT IT GOT IT GOT IT AGAIN GOT IT AGAIN ♪
♪ GOT IT AGAIN YOU'VE GOT IT
AGAIN YOU'VE GOT IT AGAIN YOU'VE GOT IT AGAIN ♪
♪ THE TREES ARE IN THE MEADOW
THE COWS ARE IN THE PIGS ♪
♪ THE PEOPLE AREN'T
ANYWHERE TO BE FOUND
THE GRAVEDIGGER DIGS ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES I KNOW YOU
HONEY LOOK INTO MY EYES I SEE YOU HONEY
LOOK INTO MY EYES ♪
♪ I KNOW IT HONEY
LOOK INTO MY EYES QUIET QUIET LOOK INTO MY EYES ♪
♪ OH I KNOW YOU HONEY
LOOK INTO MY EYES OH I FEEL IT HONEY
LOOK INTO MY EYES ♪
♪ YOU'RE HYPNOTIZED
HYPNOTIZED HYPNOTIZED ♪
♪
♪ SILENT AS A CITIZEN
CITY STREETS OF GHOSTS AND PAST ♪
♪ THEY USED TO LAUGH
AND DANCE HERE
UNTIL A SPELL WAS CAST LOOK INTO MY EYES ♪
♪ I KNOW YOU HONEY
LOOK INTO MY EYES I SEE YOU HONEY LOOK INTO MY EYES ♪
♪ I KNOW IT HONEY
LOOK INTO MY EYES QUIET QUIET LOOK INTO MY EYES ♪
♪ OH I KNOW YOU HONEY
LOOK INTO MY EYES OH I FEEL YOU HONEY
LOOK INTO MY EYES ♪
♪ YOU'RE HYPNOTIZED
HYPNOTIZED ♪
♪ YOU GOT IT AGAIN YOU GOT IT
AGAIN YOU GOT IT AGAIN YOU'VE GOT IT AGAIN ♪
♪ YOU'VE GOT IT AGAIN YOU'VE GOT
IT AGAIN YOU'VE GOT IT AGAIN ♪
♪ DON'T THAT MIRROR DRAWS DOWN
YOUR HEAD ♪
♪ YOU THINK THE IMAGE IS REAL
YOUR TEARS ARE MELTING YOUR FACE ♪
♪ BUT YOU FORGOT HOW TO FEEL
♪ REMEMBER YOUR LUNGS REMEMBER
YOUR LUNGS ♪
♪ REMEMBER YOUR LUNGS THE WEIGHT
OF YOUR BONES REMEMBER YOUR LUNGS ♪
♪ WAKE UP AND
LOOK INTO MY EYES ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES I LOVE YOU
HONEY ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES I NEED YOU
HONEY ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES QUIET
QUIET ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES I LOVE YOU
HONEY ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES I NEED YOU
HONEY ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES HYPNOTIZED
HYPNOTIZED ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES LOOK INTO MY
EYES ♪
♪ I SEE YOU HONEY LOOK INTO MY
EYES I KNOW IT HONEY ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES QUIET
QUIET ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES I KNOW YOU
HONEY ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES I SEE YOU
HONEY ♪
♪ LOOK INTO MY EYES OH YOU'RE
HYPNOTIZED HYPNOTIZED ♪
>> Dicky: THE "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" CONCERT SERIES IS
PRESENTED BY MERCEDES‐BENZ. THE BEST OR NOTHING.
>> Jimmy: THANKS TO ANTHONY MACKIE, EDGAR RAMIREZ
AND TUNE‐YARDS. APOLOGIES TO MATT DAMON.
"NIGHTLINE" IS NEXT. HAPPY ST. PATTY'S DAY AND AS
THEY SAY IN IRELAND "GOODNIGHT."