>> Dicky: FROM HOLLYWOOD -- IT'S "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE"!
TONIGHT -- LIL REL HOWERY.
WYATT RUSSELL. AND MUSIC FROM JAZMINE SULLIVAN.
AND NOW, JIMMY KIMMEL! >> Jimmy: HI, THAT'S ME.
THAT'S RIGHT. HI, I'M JIMMY.
I'M THE HOST OF THE SHOW. THANKS FOR WATCHING.
WE ARE BACK TO WORK AFTER A WEEK OF VACATION.
I HAVE TO BE HONEST, I'M GLAD TO BE BACK.
WE WENT ON A CRUISE. YOU EVER BEEN ON A CRUISE,
GUILLERMO? >> NO, NEVER.
>> Jimmy: WE WENT ON A CRUISE THROUGH THE SUEZ CANAL.
YOU EVER DONE THAT? VERY SLOW.
VERY VERY SLOW. ALMOST AS IF WE WEREN'T MOVING
AT ALL. I HAVE TO SAY -- AFTER ALL THE
FIGHTING AND TOOTH-GNASHING OVER THE PAST FEW YEARS, IT WAS NICE
TO SEE THE WHOLE WORLD COME TOGETHER TO MAKE FUN OF A BOAT.
IT REALLY WAS. A CONTAINER SHIP, KNOWN AS THE
"EVER GIVEN", HAD BEEN WEDGED IN THE SUEZ CANAL FOR SIX DAYS.
WAS FINALLY FREED THIS MORNING BAY FLEET OF TUGBOATS.
SAME WAY THEY GOT TRUMP OUT OF THE WHITE HOUSE.
THE SUEZ CANAL, I THINK WE ALL LEARNED A LITTLE BIT ABOUT IT IN
SCHOOL, IT'S ONE OF THE MAIN ARTERIES FOR SHIPS CARRYING
GOODS AROUND THE GLOBE. IT WAS COMPLETELY BLOCKED BY
THIS SHIP. BASICALLY, CAPITALISM HAD A
HEART ATTACK OVER THIS PAST WEEK.
THE SHIP THAT GOT STUCK WAS LOADED WITH IKEA FURNITURE.
WHICH MEANS THOUSANDS OF MEN IN THEIR TWENTIES NOW HAVE AN
EXCUSE FOR WHY THEY DON'T OWN A HEADBOARD.
BUT THE TOTAL VALUE OF THE OTHER GOODS UNABLE TO GET THROUGH
AMOUNTED TO SOMETHING LIKE $10,000,000,000 A DAY.
AND THEY SAY, "WE MAY SEE THE EFFECTS OF THE LOGJAM IN
STORES. IN PARTICULAR THEY SAY WE
MIGHT HAVE A SHORTAGE OF COFFEE AND TOILET PAPER.
THE GOOD NEWS IS, WITHOUT ONE, YOU MIGHT NOT NEED THE OTHER.
BU STILL, IT'S CRAZY THAT SOMETHING LIKE THIS CAN BRING
THE COMMERCE OF THE WORLD TO A HALT.
I NEVER REALIZED HOW NARROW THE SUEZ CANAL IS.
THIS IS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE FROM ABOVE.
SO MUCH OF OUR STUFF HAS TO SQUEEZE THROUGH THAT THIN LITTLE
SPACE. CAN'T WE LOOSEN THAT UP?
ADD A CARPOOL LANE OR SOMETHING? I MEAN, IF THIS WAS A URETHRA,
THEY WOULD HAVE TO OPERATE. THEY WOULD HAVE TO --
THEY'RE STILL INVESTIGATING HOW THIS HAPPENED.
THE SHIPPING COMPANY IS BLAMING A STRONG GUST OF WIND.
WHICH THEY FINISHED THIS CANAL IN 1869.
IN 150 YEARS, THEY NEVER HAD A WIND?
WE ARE ALSO LEARNING MORE ABOUT THE ORIGIN OF THE CORONAVIRUS.
COVID-19. ACCORDING TO A NEW REPORT FROM
THE WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION, COVID-19 MOST LIKELY TOOK HOLD
IN AN ANIMAL. SPECIFICALLY, THIS CAT WITH A
WAFFLE ON ITS HEAD. FORMER MEMBERS OF DONALD TRUMP'S
PANDEMIC TEAM ARE SPEAKING OUT. DR. DEBORAH BIRX SAYS SHE
BELIEVES THE DEATH TOLL COULD HAVE BEEN MUCH LOWER IF THE
TRUMP ADMINISTRATION HAD TAKEN THE VIRUS MORE SERIOUSLY.
DR. BIRX SAT WITH DR. SANJAY GUPTA LAST NIGHT ON CNN TO
BELATEDLY BEMOAN HER WORK AT THE WHITE HOUSE.
>> YOU'RE THE COVID COORDINATOR, AND NO ONE AROUND YOU IS WEARING
MASKS. THAT MUST HAVE MADE YOU FEEL
LIKE YOU WERE BEING MARGINALIZED.
NO ONE WAS LISTENING TO YOU. >> I WAS MARGINALIZED EVERY DAY.
THAT IS NO QUESTION. I WOULD SAY THE MAJORITY OF
PEOPLE IN THE WHITE HOUSE DID NOT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY.
>> Jimmy: WELL, THANKS FOR LETTING US KNOW NOW.
AS I RECALL, YOU SAT THERE VERY QUIETLY WHILE THE PRESIDENT
SUGGESTED WE GARGLE WINDEX. DR. BIRX SAYS SHE WAS BEING
CENSORED BY THE WHITE HOUSE. AS IF SHE COULDN'T HAVE CALLED
A DOZEN NEWS NETWORKS AT ANY TIME.
THERE WAS MORE LEAKING COMING FROM TRUMP'S WHITE HOUSE THAN
TRUMP'S GOLF PANTS. THAT WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN A
PROBLEM. DR. FAUCI EXPRESSED SIMILAR
THOUGHTS ABOUT HOW THE PANDEMIC BEING MISHANDLED IN HIS
INTERVIEW WITH CNN. AND SO TODAY TRUMP RESPONDED
WITH A LETTER THAT BEGINS "STATEMENT BY DONALD J. TRUMP,
45th PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA."
"BASED ON THEIR INTERVIEWS, I FELT IT WAS TIME TO SPEAK UP
ABOUT DR. FAUCI AND DR. BIRX, TWO SELF-PROMOTERS -- I LOVE
WHEN THE GUY WHO PUTS HIS NAME ON EVERYTHING CALLS SOMEONE A
PROMOTER -- TRYING TO REINVENT HISTORY AND COVER FOR THEIR BAD
INSTINCTS WHICH FORTUNATELY I ALMOST ALWAYS OVERTURNED.
DR. FAUCI, WHO SAID HE WAS AN ATHLETE IN COLLEGE BUT COULDN'T
THROW A BASEBALL EVEN CLOSE TO HOME PLATE, IT WAS A ROLLER,
TRIED TO TAKE CREDIT FOR A VACCINE.
"I WAS THE ONE TO GET IT DONE, AND EVEN THE FAKE NEWS KNOWS AND
REPORTS THIS." DR. BIRX IS A PROVEN LIAR WITH
VERY LITTLE CREDIBILITY LEFT. DR. BIRX WAS A TERRIBLE MEDICAL
ADVISER, WHICH IS WHY I SELDOM FOLLOWED THEIR ADVICE.
TIME HAS PROVEN ME CORRECT. I ONLY KEPT DR. FAUCI AND
DR. BIRX ON BECAUSE THEY WORKED FOR THE U.S. GOVERNMENT FOR SO
LONG. THEY ARE LIKE A BAD HABIT."
AND THEN IT ENDS. AND THEN HE FELL ASLEEP IN HIS
MASHED POTATOES OR SOMETHING. I DON'T KNOW.
MEANWHILE, PRESIDENT BIDEN TODAY, ANNOUNCED THAT WITHIN
THREE WEEKS, 90% OF AMERICAN ADULTS, WILL BE ELIGIBLE TO GET
THE VACCINE. 75% OF AMERICANS, INCLUDING A
MAJORITY OF REPUBLICANS, APPROVE OF THE WAY BIDEN HAS HANDLED THE
ROLL-OUT OF THE VACCINE, WHICH IS DRIVING THEM ABSOLUTELY NUTS
IN TRUMPLAND. ERIC TRUMP, POPPED HIS DOPEY
LITTLE HEAD ONTO FOX NEWS YESTERDAY, TO ASK A QUESTION
THAT IS ON LITERALLY NO ONE'S MIND.
>> AT WHAT POINT DOES JOE BIDEN, AT WHAT POINT DOES THE
ADMINISTRATION COME OUT SAYING HE DID A REALLY GOOD JOB
DELIVERING US A VACCINE AND NOW WE'RE GOING TO SPEND THE NEXT
SIX MONTHS DISTRIBUTING IT TO EVERYONE ELSE.
WHY DOES THAT NEED TO BE CONTROVERSIAL?
WHY CAN SOMEBODY NOT ADMIT THAT SOMEBODY DID A PHENOMENAL JOB?
MY FATHER DID A PHENOMENAL JOB WITH THE VACCINE.
LITERALLY IT PROBABLY SAVED THE MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF LIVES
IN THIS COUNTRY. >> Jimmy: YEAH, I WONDER WHY.
I BET IT'S BECAUSE YOUR FATHER TOLD US TO DRINK BLEACH AND WENT
GOLFING 20 TIMES WHILE THE VIRUS WAS SPREADING.
JUST A HUNCH. ERIC LOVES SAYING "MY FATHER."
HE SAYS "FATHER" MORE TIMES IN ONE INTERVIEW THAN I DID IN
SEVEN YEARS AS AN ALTAR BOY. >> I SAW HOW MUCH TIME AND
EFFORT MY FATHER PUT INTO THE JOB.
YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES MY FATHER WENT DOWN TO THE BOARDER?
THERE IS NO ONE WHO KNOWS MY FATHER AS WELL ISRAEL ARIZONA I
DID. I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND IT.
MY FATHER, MY FATHER, MY FATHER -- THEY TRIED TO IMPEACH
MY FATHER. >> Jimmy: WILL SOMEBODY PLEASE
TAKE THAT KID FISHING ALREADY? IF THEY WEREN'T SO TERRIBLE,
THIS WOULD BE THE SADDEST FAMILY IN THE WORLD.
AND WHILE ERIC IS PLEADING FOR CREDIT ON CABLE TV, DADDY DONNY
STOPPED INTO A WEDDING AT MAR-A-LAGO.
HE RENTS HIS HOUSE OUT FOR WEDDINGS.
OKAY? ONE OF HIS FRIEND SLASH CLUB
MEMBER DONORS GOT MARRIED AT MAR-A-LAGO ON SATURDAY.
AND THE FORMER PRESIDENT HAD SOME BEAUTIFUL WORDS FOR THE
BRIDE AND GROOM. >> I GET ALL THESE FLASH
REPORTS, AND THEY'RE TELLING ME ABOUT THE BORDER.
THEY'RE TELLING ME ABOUT CHINA. THEY'RE TELLING ME ABOUT IRAN.
HOW ARE WE DOING WITH IRAN? BT THEY WERE READY TO MAKE A
DEAL. THEY WOULD HAVE DONE ANYTHING.
AND THAT GUY GOES TRUMP --
NEGOTIATE NOW. WE'RE NOT DEALING WITH THE
UNITED STATES. THEY DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH US.
>> Jimmy: YOU KNOW WHAT? I SAID THE SAME THING AT MY
BROTHER'S WEDDING. IT WAS WORD FOR WORD.
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. WATCH THE BAND BEHIND HIM, AS HE
GOES ON AND ON ABOUT HOW GREAT HE WAS.
THEY'RE LIKE "CAN WE JUST PLAY 'DANCING QUEEN' AND GET THE HELL
OUT OF HERE?" >> LOOK, IT'S A DISASTER.
IT'S A HUMANITARIAN DISASTER FROM THEIR STANDPOINT, AND IT'S
GOING TO DESTROY THE COUNTRY. AND FRANKLY, THE COUNTRY CAN'T
AFFORD IT, BECAUSE YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT INCREDIBLY MASSIVE
AMOUNTS OF SCHOOL SYSTEMS, OUR HOSPITAL SYSTEMS, EVERYTHING.
SO IT'S A ROUGH THING. AND I JUST SAY, DO YOU MISS ME?
>> Jimmy: IT'S A WEDDING! IT IS A WEDDING.
I USED TO DJ AT WEDDINGS WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE.
AND I'VE SEEN SOME WEIRD TOASTS. BUT NEVER HAVE I SEEN ONE LIKE
THIS. HOW DO YOU GIVE A DRUNKEN
WEDDING TOAST WHEN YOU DON'T EVEN DRINK!
>> WE WERE SAYING, WE DID GET 75 BILLION VOTES.
NO ONE HAS EVER GOTTEN TO THAT. THEY SAID GET 66 MILLION VOTE,
SIR, AND THE ELECTION IS OVER. WELL, I GOT 75 MILLION.
BUT YOU SAW WHAT HAPPENED? 10:30 IN THE EVENING, ALL OF THE
SUDDEN THEY SAID THAT'S A STRANGE THING.
WHY ARE THEY CLOSING UP CERTAIN PLACES?
A LOT OF THINGS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.
I JUST WANT TO SAY IT'S AN HONOR TO MEET YOU.
IT'S AN HONOR TO HAVE YOU AT MAR-A-LAGO.
YOU HAVE A GREAT AND BEAUTIFUL COUPLE.
MANY YEARS -- [ APPLAUSE ]
SPECIAL. HAVE FUN.
>> Jimmy: "HAVE FUN." THIS IS WHAT HE DOES NOW.
HE BABBLES AT WEDDINGS. WHENEVER SOMEONE PLAYS THE SONG
"YMCA," HE MAGICALLY APPEARS LIKE BEETLEJUICE.
HE ENDED THE SPEECH BY INSTRUCTING THE GUESTS TO
VIOLENTLY STORM THE BUFFET TABLE.
YET ANOTHER TRUMP ALLY MAY HAVE TO PAY FOR PEDDLING HIS
NONSENSICAL ELECTION CLAIMS. FOX NEWS JUST GOT HIT WITH A
$1.6 BILLION DOLLAR LAWSUIT FROM DOMINION VOTING SYSTEMS.
I FEEL LIKE THE ONLY REASON DOMINION HASN'T SUED TRUMP FOR
THEY KNOW FOR SURE HE DOESN'T HAVE A BILLION DOLLARS.
BUT THEY'RE NOW SUING FOX, RUDY GIULIANI, SIDNEY POWELL, AND
MICHAEL LINDELL, THE MYPILLOW GUY WHO HAS A NEW THEORY THAT
MAY FINALLY PROVE THAT HIS HEAD IS FULL OF FEATHERS TOO.
>> ALL THE EVIDENCE I HAVE, EVERYTHING IS GOING TO GO BEFORE
THE SUPREME COURT AND THE ELECTION OF 2020 IS GOING
BYE-BYE. IT WAS AN ATTACK BY OTHER
COUNTRY, COMMUNISM COMING IN. I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE GOING
TO DO AFTER THEY PULL IT DO-- >> HANG ON.
>> DONALD TRUMP LEFT THE OFFICE IN AUGUST.
>> Jimmy: THERE. THE CRACKHEAD PILLOW SALESMAN IS
RIGHT. BY AUGUST, DONALD TRUMP WILL BE
BACK IN OFFICE. AND MIKE LINDELL WILL BE LIVING
IN A VAN BY THE RIVER. WAIT UNTIL THE PILLOW GUY DOES A
DEEP DIVE INTO THIS ONE. ACCORDING TO MULTIPLE STUDIES,
HUMAN PENISES, SPECIFICALLY THE ONES ON MEN- ARE GETTING
SMALLER. THEY ARE SHRINKING AS A RESULT
OF POLLUTION. SO FINALLY SOMETHING TO BLAME
OUR SHORTCOMINGS ON OTHER THAN DAD.
THEY SAY THIS PATTERN OF SHRINKAGE IS CAUSED BY CHEMICALS
IN CERTAIN PLASTICS. DID YOU KNOW THE AVERAGE PERSON
EATS ABOUT A CREDIT CARD'S WORTH OF PLASTIC EVERY WEEK?
FORGET VACCINES, THAT'S HOW BILL GATES GETS THE CHIPS INTO
US. EVERY YEAR, WE EAT A WHOLE DECK
OFDISCOVER CARDS! RESEARCHERS BELIEVE THAT IF WE
DON'T GET OUR ACT TOGETHER, IN THE FUTURE, ALL MEN WILL BE KEN.
AND PLASTIC. IF THAT DOESN'T GET REPUBLICANS
IN CONGRESS TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT CLIMATE CHANGE, I DON'T
KNOW IF ANYTHING WILL. AT LEAST IT MIGHT CREATE SOME
NEW ENVIRONMENTALISTS. "SO, WHAT BRINGS YOU TO
GREENPEACE?" SPEAKING OF WIENERS, CONGRESSMAN
DEVIN NUNES, THIS YOU COULDN'T MAKE UP.
TEAM NUNES LAST WEEK HAD TO CORRECT MULTIPLE MISTAKES ON
THEIR FINANCIAL FILINGS. THE MISTAKES WERE MADE BY HIS
CAMPAIGN TREASURER WHO ALSO HAPPENS TO BE HIS MOM.
DOESN'T DEVIN NUNES LOOK LIKE A GUY WHO'D HIRE HIS MOM TO BE HIS
TREASURER? THE ANSWER IS YES, HE DOES.
OUR NEW VICE PRESIDENT IS REPORTEDLY A BIT PO'D.
KAMALA HARRIS IS SAID TO BE FRUSTRATED, BECAUSE SHE AND HER
HUSBAND HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO MOVE INTO THE VICE PRESIDENT'S
OFFICIAL RESIDENCE. APPARENTLY THERE ARE RENOVATIONS
GOING ON THAT ARE STILL NOT FINISHED.
TURNS OUT, UNINSTALLING THE PENCE'S SEX DUNGEON TAKES LONGER
THAN THEY THOUGHT IT WOULD. IT'S CRAZY, THOUGH.
THEY'RE TWO MONTHS PAST THE INAUGURATION, AND THEY'RE
WORKING IT. IMAGINE YOU JUST BECAME THE
SECOND IN COMMAND OF THE MOST POWERFUL COUNTRY IN EARTH.
THEY MAKE YOU SPEND THE FIRST THREE MONTHS ON A FUTON.
IN COLLEGE BASKETBALL, THE ELITE EIGHT ROUND OF THE NCAA
TOURNAMENT IS UNDERWAY. IF THEY CONTINUE TO WIN,
GONZAGA -- COULD BECOME THE FIRST FICTIONAL UNIVERSITY TO
FINISH A SEASON UNDEFEATED. AS OF SHOWTIME TONIGHT THERE
WERE STILL TWO CINDERELLA CANDIDATES STILL IN IT.
UCLA, AN ELEVENTH SEED, AND OREGON STATE, A 12 SEED, ARE
AS IS 6 SEED USC. IN OTHER WORDS, THIS IS A GREAT
YEAR FOR PEOPLE WHO FILLED OUT THEIR BRACKET WITH A MAGIC EIGHT
BALL. TONIGHT IS NOTABLE, IN THAT NOT
ONE, BUT TWO OF OUR GUESTS ARE HERE IN THE FLESH.
THINGS ARE LOOSENING UP A LITTLE BIT, WHICH IS EXCITING, BUT ALSO
A LITTLE BIT NERVE WRACKING. I WAS TELLING MY WIFE SALLY --
MOLLY, SORRY. MOLLY, RIGHT?
YEAH. I WAS TELLING HER THAT -- I WAS
SAYING I'M READY TO GO BACK TO NORMAL, BUT I ALSO WANT TO KEEP
THE GOOD THINGS FROM LOCKDOWN. I WANT TO GET RID OF THE -- I
WANT TO BE ABLE TO GO OUT TO EAT, BUT I ALSO DON'T WANT TO
HAVE A MEETING EVER AGAIN. WE'VE BEEN HOLED UP FOR SO LONG,
I FEEL LIKE MAYBE SOME OF US HAVE FORGOTTEN HOW TO BEHAVE IN
PUBLIC, SO WE PUT AN INSTRUCTIONAL VIDEO TOGETHER.
TO HELP YOU ACCLIMATE. AND PLEASE, PAY CLOSE ATTENTION.
BECAUSE THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS WE'VE EVER
DONE. >> SOCIETY.
REMEMBER THAT KOOKY PLACE? NOW THAT A VACCINE IS ON THE
WAY, YOU'LL BE BACK TO THE REAL WORLD, LICKETY-SPLIT.
BUT IN CASE YOU'RE RUSTY, HERE ARE A FEW TIPS TO ENSURE A
SUCCESSFUL RETURN TO REGULAR LIFE.
LET'S BEGIN. THESE ARE PANTS.
THEY GO ON YOUR LEGS, WHICH ARE THOSE TWO LOG-LOOKING THINGS
BELOW YOUR PENIS. PANTS ARE IMPORTANT, AND YOU'RE
EXPECTED TO WEAR THEM IN PUBLIC. ALMOST GOT IT.
LOOKING GOOD. NOW OUT THE DOOR YOU GO.
UH-OH. LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DEVELOPED A
CRIPPLING FEAR OF THE OUTSIDE WORLD.
WELL, BOTTLE UP THOSE EMOTIONS, YOU LITTLE BITCH.
IT'S TIME FOR WORK. ISN'T IT GREAT TO BE BACK IN THE
OFFICE WITH YOUR CREEKY CHAIR AND OBSOLETE COMPUTER?
HOLD ON, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR PANTS?
OOPS, YOU'RE FIRED. OH, WELL, BUT AT LEAST NOW YOU
HAVE SOME FREE TIME ON YOUR HANDS.
HOORAY FOR MOVIE THEATERS. [ CELL PHONE RINGING ]
>> NOW YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO USE YOUR PHONE DURING THE FILM,
BUT NOBODY CARED ABOUT THAT TODAY.
>> YES, I'D LOVE TO TAKE A SURVEY.
>> SHH! >> YOU SHUT UP!
I'LL KILL YOU! >> ISN'T IT GREAT BEING AROUND
YOUR FELLOW MAN ONCE AGAIN? AH, HUMANITY.
IT SURE IS THE WORST. WELL, THAT'S IT FOR NOW.
JOIN US TOMORROW WHEN WE REINTRODUCE YOU TO HIGH-FIVES.
NOPE. >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT.
THERE YOU GO. WE HAVE A GOOD SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT. FROM "THE FALCON AND THE WINTER
SOLDIER," WYATT RUSSELL IS HERE. WE'VE GOT MUSIC FROM
JAZMINE SULLIVAN. AND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
LIL REL HOWERY. [ CHEERING AND APPLAUSE ]
♪ [ CHEERING AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: YEAH, HI. TONIGHT FROM THE NEW MARVEL
JUGGERNAUT TV SHOW "THE FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLDIER," WYATT
RUSSELL IS WITH US. THEN, SHE IS A WONDERFUL SINGER
FROM PHILADELPHIA. HER EP IS CALLED "HEAUX TALES."
MUSIC FROM JAZMINE SULLIVAN. WE'VE GOT NEW SHOWS ALL THIS
WEEK WITH OUR GUEST MELISSA McCARTHY,
OCTAVIA SPENCER, BOB ODENKIRK, LAUREN GRAHAM, JAMIE FOXX, AND
WE'LL HAVE MUSIC FROM TATE McRAE, AJR, AND FITZ
FEATURING BRYCE VINE. SO PLEASE JOIN US FOR THAT.
OUR FIST GUEST YOU KNOW FROM MOVIES "GET OUT" AND "JUDAS AND
THE PLAQUE MESSIAH." YOU CAN SEE HIM NOW ALONGSIDE
ERIC ANDRE AND TIFFANY HADDISH IN THE VERY FUNNY PRANK MOVIE
"BAD TRIP." IT'S ON NETFLIX NOW.
PLEASE WELCOME LIL REL HOWERY. [ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: THANKS FOR COMING. AND HEY, ALSO.
>> I'M JUST TAKING THIS IN. >> Jimmy: TAKE IT IN, YES.
YOU LOOK GOOD. YOU LOOK VERY SHARP.
>> THANK YOU. >> Jimmy: AND THANK YOU FOR
FILLING IN AS GUEST HOST FOR ME OVER THE SUMMER.
I THINK YOU DID A FANTASTIC JOB. YOU REALLY DID.
YOU DID A GREAT JOB. >> YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUNNY, JIMMY?
I LITERALLY KEEP LOOKING AT PEOPLE.
I FEEL LIKE I HAVEN'T SEEN PEOPLE IN A PLACE IN A WHILE.
I'M LIKE -- Y'ALL GOOD? EVERYBODY GOOD?
>> Jimmy: IT'S FUNNY, THESE PARTICULAR PEOPLE I THINK WERE
NERVOUS THE LAST TIME THEY SAW YOU, THIS IS OUR STAFF BECAUSE
WHEN YOU DID THE MONOLOGUE, YOU WOULDN'T TELL ANYONE WHAT YOU
WERE GOING TO SAY. >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: WHICH USUALLY THERE IS A SHARING PROCESS THAT GOES ON.
>> I REMEMBER WHEN I WALKED IN TO DO IT, IT FELT LIKE EVERYBODY
REALLY WAS WATCHING. OKAY, HERE WE GO.
>> Jimmy: BECAUSE USUALLY EVERYBODY KIND OF COLLABORATES
ON THE MONOLOGUE. BUT YOU CAME IN AND YOU SPOKE
VERY BEAUTIFULLY ABOUT WHAT WAS GOING ON IN THE WORLD AT THAT
TIME. AND IT WAS VERY -- IT FELT
VER -- IT WAS MUCH MORE PERSONAL I THINK THAN ANYTHING
THAT HAD HAPPENED ALL SUMMER LONG.
>> AND I DIDN'T WRITE IT. >> Jimmy: YOU JUST SAID IT?
>> WHAT HAPPENED IS I TALKED TO SOMEBODY EARLIER, ONE OF MANY
FRIENDS AND THIS IS WHAT I THINK I'M GOING TO GO WITH.
I JUST WANTED TO SPEAK FROM THE HEART.
WE WAS ALL SITTING AT HOME. I KNOW I CAN BE HILARIOUS, BUT
THAT MOMENT DIDN'T FEEL LIKE THAT.
>> Jimmy: RIGHT. >> I LOST MY AUNTIE TO COVID.
>> Jimmy: YOU DID, YEAH. >> IT WAS JUST A LOT GOING ON.
I JUST WANTED TO BE HONEST. SO THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME THE
PLATFORM TO DO THAT. >> Jimmy: WELL, THANK YOU FOR
DOING IT. YOU MENTIONED YOUR AUNT.
YOUR AUNT. YOU POSTED SOMETHING ABOUT HER.
RHODA WAS HER NAME? >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: TELL US ABOUT A LITTLE BIT ABOUT HER.
>> SHE WAS THE MATRIARCH OF OUR FAMILY AND OUR HISTORIAN.
SO EVERY THANKSGIVING, THAT'S WHO I WOULD SIT WITH JUST TO
LEARN ABOUT STUFF I DIDN'T KNOW. SHE WOULD BE HAVING CHURCH
ANNIVERSARY PROGRAMS AND ALL THIS STUFF.
BUT SHE WAS OUR HISTORIAN. BUT I LOVE THAT SHE WAS ALWAYS
FASCINATED ABOUT ME DOING THIS. SO PICTURES LIKE MY FAMILY
SHOWING UP TO MY PREMIERES I DO IN CHICAGO WITH LIL REL SHIRTS
ON, I'VE GOT A CRAZY SUPPORTIVE FAMILY.
SHE WAS JUST DOPE, AND ONE OF THE SMARTEST PEOPLE I'VE EVER
MET. YOU KNOW, THE REASON WHY I WAS
EVEN ABLE TO SPEAK LIKE I DID WAS BECAUSE OF MY FAMILY, THE
WAY I GREW UP. MY FIRST PROTEST, I THINK I WAS
10. AND I WAS DOING DESERT STORM.
SHE STARTED A GROUP IN CHICAGO, MOTHERS AGAINST DESERT STORM.
SHE WAS ON THE COVER OF "PEOPLE WEEKLY".
>> Jimmy: WOW. >> THAT'S ALWAYS BEEN IN ME TO
BE REALLY HONEST. SHOUT OUT TO THE HATCH FAMILY.
>> Jimmy: SHE PLANTED THAT SEED IN YOU.
WOW. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE
IN FRONT OF A LIVE AUDIENCE? >> YOU KNOW SOMETHING?
IT'S -- IT'S -- ALL THIS IS DIFFERENT NOW.
>> Jimmy: YEAH. >> IT IS.
BUT IT FELT GOOD. IT'S WEIRD TOO BECAUSE I DON'T
CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK ANYMORE. EVEN IF I LITERALLY BLOCK
EVERYBODY OUT NOW. WHATEVER I THINK IS FUNNY.
IF YOU LAUGH, IT'S ON YOU. IF YOU DON'T, I DON'T CARE JUST
A MINUTE. IS THAT FROM BEING ALONE?
>> I THINK SO. LOOK, DOING QUARANTINE BECAUSE I
HAD THE KIDS WITH ME AT FIRST, BUT WE DIDN'T THINK THIS WAS
GOING TO LAST. I WAS IN ATLANTA SHOOTING A
MOVIE. I'LL BE BACK IN A COUPLE OF
WEEKS. AND YOU START SITTING THERE, OH,
NO, I DON'T THINK -- I THINK I NEED TO GET ANY STUFF.
BECAUSE I LEFT ALL MY STUFF THERE.
>> Jimmy: HOW OLD ARE THE KIDS? >> 12, 11 AND 4.
SO THEY WAS IN GEORGIA. OTIS TOO.
THE LITTLE ONE IS IN CHICAGO. BUT EVERYBODY WAS GONE.
SO I WAS ALL BY MYSELF. ALL I HAD WAS ME AND THE
PELOTON. >> Jimmy: IF YOU DO IT GOOD, IS
THAT WHAT HAPPENS? >> I WENT CRAZY.
THE PELOTON, THAT'S A COMPETITIVE COMMUNITY, YOU KNOW
WHAT I MEAN? LIKE FOR REAL.
PEOPLE REALLY CARE ABOUT BEING ON THE LEAD.
I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE LEADERBOARD.
I JUST WANT TO FEEL GOOD. BUT I GOT A HOMEGIRL.
SHE IS PREGNANT. SHE BE BLOWING ME OUT THE WATER,
SHE BE TALKING CRAZY. LADY, YOU STOP, I DON'T WANT TO
COMPETE WITH YOU. BUT I WAS LONELY.
JIMMY, I WAS LITERALLY I WAS FACE TIMING WITH MY KIDS.
AND OKAY, DADDY. NO, COULD Y'ALL STAY ON THE
PHONE? THEY'RE LIKE DAD, ARE YOU IN OUR
ROOM? YES, OKAY, I'M BY MYSELF!
>> Jimmy: THAT'S WHEN YOU KNOW YOU'RE LONELY.
>> WHEN YOU'RE LAYING ON THE ANIMALS.
IT'S ALL TRUE. THAT'S WHAT I DID.
THE BABY YODA. ME AND BABY YODA SLEPT A LOT OF
NIGHTS TOGETHER. >> Jimmy: I HEARD THAT YOU
RECORDED A COMEDY ALBUM. >> YES.
>> Jimmy: NOW THIS IS JUST AN ALBUM?
NOT A VIDEO? >> JUST AN ALBUM.
>> Jimmy: DO PEOPLE EVEN DO THAT ANYMORE?
>> I'M SUCH AN OLD SCHOOL THROWBACK TYPE OF GUY.
AND SOME OF MY FAVORITE COMEDIANS, THOSE ALBUMS, MAN.
>> Jimmy: WHAT ARE YOU SOME YOU HAVE FAVORITE COMEDY ALBUMS AS A
KID? >> RICHARD PRYOR, ANY OF HIS
ALBUMS, MOB MABLI. IT'S STUFF THAT EDDIE MURPHY
DIDN'T DO ON DELIRIOUS AND RAW THAT IS JUST ALBUM FUN.
SOME OF THE BEST BITS YOU EVER HEAR.
HE GET HIT BY A CAR, OH MY GOD, HE GOT HIT BY A CAR.
I HATE DOING PEOPLE'S JOKES. I'M TERRIBLE AT IT.
BURY I USED TO LISTEN TO IT. I HAD A BEST OF EDDIE MURPHY
TAPE I USED TO LISTEN TO EVERY DAY IN HIGH SCHOOL.
>> Jimmy: HAVE YOU MET EDDIE MURPHY?
>> NO. >> Jimmy: YOU'VE NOT?
>> IT'S THE WEIRDEST THING BECAUSE I'M A HUGE EDDIE MURPHY
FAN. HE JUST DID A MOVIE WITH ONE OF
MY BEST FRIENDS, JERMAINE FOWLER.
I DON'T KNOW WHY I HAVEN'TED ME EDDIE MURPHY YET.
I MET HIS KIDS. I MET HIS EX-WIFE.
I HAVEN'T MET EDDIE MURPHY. >> Jimmy: WHEN JERMAINE TOLD YOU
HE WAS GOING TO BE IN THAT MOVIE PLAYING EDDIE MURPHY'S SON,
WHERE YOU JEALOUS? >> NO.
ME AND JERMAINE, THAT'S HOW WE BECAME FRIENDS.
WHEN I FIRST MET HIM, HE IRRITATED HIM.
I'M AN OLDER DUDE. HE IS A YOUNGER GUY.
THEY GAVE US A PER DIEM. I GOT TO SEND THIS MONEY HOME TO
MY FAMILY. HE'S ALL LET'S GET AN XBOX.
WHAT? IRRESPONSIBLE.
I GOT RESPONSIBILITIES. BUT WE CAME TOGETHER BECAUSE I
SAW HIM ON STAGE AND I LOVED HIS STAGE, AND WE BOTH HAD A
CRAZY -- I DON'T WANT TO SAY OBSESSION -- WITH EDDIE MURPHY.
WE TALKED ABOUT EDDIE ALL THE TIME.
WHEN HE GOT THAT, I WAS REALLY PROUD.
I WAS SO HAPPY FOR HIM. DUDE, THIS IS INSANE.
>> Jimmy: WILL HE INTRODUCE YOU TOE EDDIE ALREADY?
>> I DON'T KNOW WHY I HAVEN'TED ME EDDIE MURPHY YET?
I MET EVERYBODY ELSE, ROBIN TOWNSEND, DAMON, EVERYBODY BUT
EDDIE MURPHY THAT IS WEIRD TO ME AT THIS POINT.
>> Jimmy: YOU HAVE TO HAVE SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD.
TO HOW WOULD YOU APPROACH EDDIE IF YOU MET HIM?
>> I WANT TO PITCH TO HIM WHAT I THINK THE BEVERLY HILLS COP
REBOOT SHOULD BE. >> Jimmy: I LOVE THAT.
THAT'S THE BEST WAY TO GET IN HIS GOOD GRACES.
>> YEAH, YEAH. >> Jimmy: START PITCHING HIM A
PROJECT. >> BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHY I
WOULDN'T DO THAT, BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW I'D BE ABLE TO TALK
TO HIM. I GOT TO GET EVERYTHING OUT OF
THE WAY. I LOOK UP TO YOU.
I WAS FEATURING TO MEET EDDIE MURPHY THIS WILL SOUND CRAZY,
REMEMBER THE MOVIE MALCOLM X, MEETS ELIJAH MUHAMMAD FOR THE
FIRST TIME AND JUST CRYING. I'M SCARED WHEN I MEET EDDIE
MURPHY THAT MIGHT HAPPEN. HE IS GOING TO BE A NICE GUY.
MY LIPS SHAKING. BROTHER AIN'T GOT TO CRY.
I'M SORRY! >> Jimmy: WE SHOULD WORKSHOP
THIS MEETING, BECAUSE YOU WILL MEET HIM AT ONE POINT.
I THINK IT'S WRONG TOE PITCH HIM RIGHT AWAY.
BY THE WAY, CRYING MIGHT BE THE WAY TO GO.
HE MAY SAY WOW, THIS GUY REALLY LIKES ME.
>> WHAT IF I PITCH AND CRY? THAT'S GOOD TOO.
>> I CAME UP WITH A CONCEPT WITH -- INSTEAD OF AXEL FOLEY,
DETECTIVE TODD WHO IS I'M HIS SON AND YOU HAVE TO BE DETECTIVE
TODD AND I BECAME THE COP. ANYWAY, I WAS GLAD TO MEET YOU.
>> Jimmy: LIL REL HOWERY IS WITH US.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. ♪
>> WHAT NOTHING? >> I'M STUCK.
I'M SINKING. WAIT A MINUTE.
GO GET SOME BUTTER. AHHH!
>> Jimmy: THAT IS "BAD TRIP" WHICH IS ON NETFLIX.
WHICH IS SO FUNNY. IT'S A VERY FUNNY MOVIE.
I'M VERY PARTICULAR WHEN IT COMES TO PRANK MOVIES.
AND I THINK ERIC ANDRE WAS ON THIS SHOW PROMOTING THE RELEASE
OF THIS FILM IN LIKE 2008. IT SEEMS LIKE THIS IS WHO HE HAS
BEEN COMING OUT NOW FOR A DECADE OR SOMETHING.
>> THAT'S WE ALL IS SHOT. ME, TIFFANY, ERIC, FACETIMING
EACH OTHER THIS WEEKEND, ESPECIALLY NOW WE'RE NUMBER ONE.
SO IT'S OUT, RIGHT? BECAUSE IT JUST KEPT SWITCHING.
IT KEPT SWITCHING DATES AND IT WAS GOING TO MOVIE THEATERS AND
NETFLIX GOT IT. MAN, SHOUT OUT TO EVERYBODY
WATCHING IT. I'VE BEEN GETTING SO MUCH LOVE.
>> Jimmy: IT'S VERY FUNNY. HOW LONG WERE YOU IN THE
PORT-A-POTTY? HOW MANY TIMES DID YOU TO DO
THAT? >> LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING
ABOUT THE PORT-A-POTTY. >> Jimmy: YEAH.
>> WHEN YOU THINK OF A PORT-A-POTTY.
AUTOMATICALLY DISGUST. I WAS KIND OF THROWING UP.
HE THOUGHT I WAS ACTING. YOU GENIUS.
NO, I'M REALLY SICK IN HERE. I DON'T CARE HOW MANY TIMES THEY
CLEANED IT, IT'S STILL A PORT-A-POTTY.
>> Jimmy: YEAH. >> I WAS IN THERE AHHH!
AND EVERYBODY OH MY GOD, HE IS A GENIUS.
HE IS IN THERE ACTING HIS BUTT OFF.
NO, I'M DISGUSTED. I KNEW IT WAS FAKE.
I KNEW THE POOP WAS FAKE, BUT I WAS SO -- I MIGHT BE TRAUMATIZED
TO BE HONEST WITH YOU. >> Jimmy: WAS THAT THE MOST
MOMENT FROM SHOOTING THAT MOVIE? >> NAH.
THE WORST MOMENT CAME THE FIRST DAY WAS THE FIRST PRANK WE DID
FIRST DAY, ME AND ERIC HAD THE CHINESE FINGER TRAP THING, WE
WAS CONNECTED. >> Jimmy: RIGHT, RIGHT.
>> BUT NOT WITH FINGERS. >> YEAH.
YOU KNOW. >> Jimmy: YES.
>> YOU GET IT. >> Jimmy: LIKE SIAMESE TWINS
JOINED IN THE STRANGEST WAY POSSIBLE.
>> YES. NOT FROM THE SIDE AND THE FRONT.
SO WE TRAPPED. I'M TELLING, WE GET TO THE HOOD,
I SAY FAM, WE CAN'T BE PRANKING PEOPLE IN THE HOOD LIKE THIS.
THEY'RE NOT GOING REACT LIKE THIS.
CALM DOWN. YOU'LL SEE.
SO WE GET TO THIS BARBERSHOP. THEY SENT US TO THE WRONG
BARBERSHOP, SO SECURITY WASN'T EVEN IN THERE.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS BROTHER WAS TALKING ABOUT BEFORE WE CAME
IN THE SHOP. THE ENERGY, HEY, MAN, LET
SOMEBODY HAPPEN IN HERE WITH THEIR THINGS CONNECTED.
SEE WHAT I DO. I FELT LIKE HE HAD THAT
CONVERSATION WITH SOMEBODY. >> Jimmy: HE WAS READY.
>> WE WAS REAL NICE ABOUT IT. EXCUSE ME, SIR.
WHAT Y'ALL DOING, MAN? HE WENT LOOKING FOR A GUN,
COULDN'T FIND IT. HE GRABBED A KNIFE, CHASED US
OUT THE BARBERSHOP. I DISCONNECT.
I'M DONE WITH. THIS I FALL TO THE GROUND.
I FALL UNDER THE CAR. THEY STOP, MY SECURITY GUY
COMING, THIS WESLEY SNIPES SECURITY GUY CAME OUT OF
NOWHERE. AFTER THAT, THE DUDE WAS
ENRAGED. OH, THIS IS A MOVIE?
OH, MAN, I WAS GOING TO KILL YOU.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> THAT'S A MOVIE.
THAT'S A MOVIE. >> Jimmy: LET.
>> LET ME TELL YOU, I WENT STRAIGHT FROM THE HOTEL TO THE
SET. I LOOKED NASTY BECAUSE I STILL
HAD THE TRAP ON, BUT I WAS WALKING.
I TELL ERIC, I QUIT. I'M DONE.
I'M NOT DOING THIS NO MORE. I'M AN ACTOR.
I NEVER CALLED MYSELF AN ACTOR BEFORE.
I'M AN ACTOR. THIS IS NOT WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO
BE DOING. SO I CALLED TIFFANY UP, VENT
ABOUT IT. TIFFANY IS LAUGHING THE WHOLE
TIME. YOU GOT SOMEBODY YOU TRY TO BE
REAL AND THEY JUST LAUGH? LET ME GET OUT OF HERE YOU.
TAKE CARE. BUT SHE CALL ERIC AFTER THAT,
LIKE ERIC, YO, DID YOU ALMOST REAL GET MURDER?
YEAH, I KNOW. I FEEL TERRIBLE.
WHAT, TERRIBLE? I WANT TO BE IN A MOVIE.
AND THAT HOW THAT HAPPENED. >> Jimmy: THAT'S HOW SHE WANTED
INTO THE MOVIE? >> WE HAD LOST OUR LEAD.
SHE HAD ANOTHER PROJECT. LITE
LITERALLY, TIFFANY WANTS TO DO IT.
>> Jimmy: WELL, IT ALL CAME TOGETHER QUITE NICELY.
AND I HIGHLY RECOMMEND. IT IS NUMBER ONE ON NETFLIX.
IT'S CALLED "BAD TRIP." LIL REL HOWERY, EVERYBODY.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH WYATT RUSSELL.
♪ >>> JAZMINE SULLIVAN IS ON THE
WAY. OUR NEXT GUEST IS ONE OF THE
NEWEST MEMBERS OF THE MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE, AND HE IS
ALREADY WEARING A STAR SPANGLED SUIT.
NEW EPISODES OF "THE FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLDIER" COME OUT ON
FRIDAY. PLEASE WELCOME WYATT RUSSELL!
>> HOW YOU DOING? >> Jimmy: GOOD TO SEE YOU.
WOW. HAPPEN TAIN AMERICA IS BEARDED
NOW. >> YEAH.
VERY. EXTREMELY.
>> Jimmy: CONGRATULATIONS ON BEING CAPTAIN AMERICA.
I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO BE CAPTAIN AMERICA, AND IT NEVER HAPPENED
FOR ME. >> YOU KNOW, AFTER ME, YOU MIGHT
BE ABLE TO SNEAK IN THERE. >> Jimmy: YOU THINK SO?
YOU THINK THERE WILL BE A SERIES OF CAPTAINS AFTER THIS.
>> HOPEFULLY. >> Jimmy: I READ SOMETHING WITH
ANTHONY MACKIE AND SEBASTIAN SAM WHO ARE STARS OF THE SHOW THAT
SAID YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT MARVEL COMICS OR THE
MOVIES OR ANY OF THIS STUFF? >> I DIDN'T GROW UP -- I DIDN'T
GROW UP KNOWING MUCH ABOUT COMIC BOOKS.
MY HEROES WERE ATHLETES. SO WHEN I CAME ON SET, I WAS
ASKING OKAY, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
WHO'S THAT PERSON? OR HOW DO THEY FIT?
FINALLY SEBASTIAN WAS LIKE DUDE, STOP ASKING QUESTIONS.
YOU'RE GOING TO GET MORE CONFUSED.
WHEN YOU GET ANSWERS, IT'S GOING TO BE WORSE.
>> Jimmy: DID YOU FEEL LIKE WHEN YOU WERE TRYING OUT FOR THE PART
THT YOU HAD TO TELL THEM YOU KNEW, YOU HAD TO PRETEND YOU
KNEW ABOUT IT? >> I DID A LITTLE.
>> Jimmy: YOU DID A LITTLE? >> THEY SHOWED ME A PICTURE OF
THE GUY, AND I WAS OH, ALL RIGHT, YEAH!
AND THEN THEY START RUNNING ME THROUGH THE STUFF.
SO YOU KNOW WHEN THANOS HIT -- SNAPS HIS FINGERS.
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. AND FINALLY ABOUT 15 MINUTES
INTO THE EXPLANATION OF WHY I AM WHO I AM, I HAD TO LOOK AT HER
AND I'M REALLY SORRY, ZOEY. I DON'T KNOW ANY OF THIS.
YOU TO START FROM THE BEGINNING. AND SHE RAN ME THROUGH IT AND
THEY WERE SUPER NICE ABOUT IT. >> Jimmy: YEAH, I GUESS THEY
WERE OKAY WITH THAT. OR MAYBE THEY ACTUALLY LIKED
THAT. >> IT'S POSSIBLE FOR THE
CHARACTER. IT KIND OF WORKS FOR THE
CHARACTER BECAUSE HE IS NEW AND HE IS NOT A PART OF THE OLD
UNIVERSE, OR WHATEVER. BUT IT WAS A SEMI EMBARRASSING
TO BE IN THE MARVEL OFFICE GOING I DON'T KNOW.
SORRY. >> Jimmy: DO I DON'T KNOW WHAT
CAPTAIN AMERICA'S SHIELD IS MADE OUT OF?
>> IT'S MADE OUT OF VIBRANIUM. >> Jimmy: OKAY, SO YOU DO KNOW
SOMETHING. >> I KNOW THAT NOW.
>> Jimmy: DID THEY GIVE YOU YOUR OWN SUIT OR ONE OF CHRIS EVANS'
OLD ONES? >> IT'S FUNNY.
I REQUESTED CHRIS EVANS' OLD SUIT.
>> Jimmy: YES? >> SO I COULD REALLY FEEL LIKE I
WAS DOING A GOOD JOB BECAUSE HE DID SUCH A GREAT JOB.
AND THEY GAVE ME A NEW ONE. >> Jimmy: WHAT DID IT FEEL LIKE
THE FIRST TIME YOU PUT IT ON AND YOU LOOK IN THE MIRROR?
>> IT WAS OH, GOSH, TAKE IT OFF! YOU GOT THE WRONG GUY.
SEND ME BACK. YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE SO MUCH
MONEY. IT WAS LIKE -- HONESTLY, WAS HOW
AM I GOING TO ACT IN THIS THING? >> Jimmy: IS IT UNCOMFORTABLE?
>> OH, YEAH, THERE IT IS. IT LOOKS AS UNCOMFORTABLE AS I
LOOK IN IT. >> Jimmy: WHY DO THEY HAVE TO
MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE? IT DOESN'T SEEM LIKE IT WOULD
HAVE TO BE UNCOMFORTABLE. >> IT'S A PRESENTATIONAL EFFECT
WHERE YOU'VE GOT TO LOOK LIKE THIS IS NOT COOL, RIGHT?
AND SO I'M SORT OF A SLOUCHY GUY.
WE'LL OOH PUT YOU IN THIS POSITION WHERE THE FIRST PIECE
LOX YOU LIKE THAT, THE SECOND PIECE ZIPS AND LOCKS YOU LIKE
THAT AND THE THIRD PIECE IS -- THAT'S UNDERNEATH THE SUIT THAT
LOOKS COOL. >> Jimmy: SEE, I DISAGREE WITH
THAT. TO ME, CAPTAIN AMERICA SHOULD
EMBODY AMERICA. HE SHOULD BE LAYING ON THE COUCH
WITH A BIG FAT STOMACH AND MAYBE A BEER HELMET INSTEAD?
>> I BASICALLY PITCHED THAT, AND THEY DIDN'T GO FOR IT.
>> Jimmy: THEY DIDN'T GO FOR IT. YEAH, MAYBE IN SEASON 17 THEY'LL
LET ME. >> Jimmy: SO YOUR DAD, KURT
RUSSELL IS ALSO IN THE MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE.
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: HE IS EGO, STAR LORD.
TECHNICALLY, I THINK YOUR STAR LORD'S STEPBROTHER OR SOMETHING.
>> THIS IS ALL NEWS TO ME. I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT IT
OBVIOUSLY. I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT IT.
>> Jimmy: DID YOU SEE YOUR FATHER IN "THE GUARDIANS OF THE
GALAXY"? >> DID.
>> Jimmy: AND YOU KNOW STAR LORD IS CHRIS PRATT?
>> YES. >> Jimmy: AND HIS REAL LIFE
FATHER-IN-LAW IS ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER, SO IN A WAY
pYOU'RE RELATED TO HIM TOO. >> OH, WOW.
>> Jimmy: SHOULD I SAY COOL? I THINK YOU SHOULD SAY COOL.
>> OKAY, COOL. >> Jimmy: SPEAKING OF COOL, PUT
THIS PICTURE UP HERE. YOU HAVE -- WHAT IS THAT, IS
THAT TECHNICALLY AN RV? IT'S A KAMPE VAN.
>> IT'S A CONVERSION VAN THAT MY WIFE AND I BOUGHT A COUPLE OF
YEARS AGO AND WE GO CAMPING IN WHENEVER WE WANT THE GET AWAY.
>> Jimmy: I LOVE THAT. >> WE WENT TO MONTANA.
WE WENT TO COLORADO. WE WENT TO OREGON.
WE SPENT A MONTH AND A HALF IN THE VAN TRAVELING AROUND TO GET
AWAY FROM PEOPLE AND VISITED THE NATIONAL PARKS.
>> Jimmy: WE HAD YOUR MOM ON THE SHOW.
YOUR MOTHER OF COURSE GOLDIE HAWN.
AND SHE SAID SOMETHING LIKE YOU CUT THEM OFF OR SOMETHING LIKE
THAT. THEY WERE IN THEIR RV AND YOU
CAME UP BEHIND THEM. >> YES.
SO THEY RENTED AN RV. IT WAS A HUGE RV CALLED A
HURRICANE, OKAY, WHICH WAS A PERFECT NAME FOR THE RV THAT
THEY WERE DRIVING. WE WERE DRIVING BEHIND THEM.
AND I SEE ON A WAZE APP THAT THE TRIANGLE COMES UP WHERE IT SAYS
CAUTION, SOMETHING BAD HAS HAPPENED UP AHEAD AND TRAFFIC IS
BUILDING UP. AND I WAS OKAY, WE'RE GOING TO
BE LATE TO THE CAMPSITE. WE'RE GOING GET THERE BEFORE
THEM. DRIVING, EVERYBODY NOW IS GOING
TO THE LEFT LANE LIKE MERGING SLOWLY OVER THIS HILTON 101.
AND I SEE AS WE CREST THE HILL THE RV IN THE RIGHT LANE.
THEY WERE DRIVING SO SLOW THAT IT THOUGHT THAT THERE WAS AN
ACCIDENT OR SOMETHING. AND I TURNED OH MY GOD, I'M
EMBARRASSED EVEN THOUGH NO ONE NOSE.
AND I DRIVE BY THEM. AND AS I DRIVE BY THEM, IT'S NOT
LIKE SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH THE RV OR ANYTHING.
MY DAD IS DRIVING THE RV HAPPIER THAN I'VE EVER SEEN HIM.
LOVING IT IF YOU HAD A HORN, GOING 35, 40.
AND PEOPLE FLYING BY GOING 70 MILES PER HOUR.
OH MY GOD, JESUS, THEY GOT PICK IT UP.
THOUGHT THERE WAS AN ACCIDENT. >> Jimmy: WHAT IS IT ABOUT
FOLLOWING YOUR DAD? I HAD THAT VERY SAME THING WITH
MY FATHER. HE WASN'T IN AN RV, BUT HE
DOESN'T WANT TO GO FAST BECAUSE HE KNOWS I'M BEHIND HIM WITH THE
KIDS IN THE CAR. SO HE JUST SLOW.
AND THEN HE KEEPS GETTING SLOWER AND SLOWER AND SLOWER UNTIL I'M
SO MAD I HAVE TO LIKE CALL AND SCREAM AT HIM ON THE TELEPHONE.
>> IT'S PART OF -- IT'S PART OF GROWING UP.
I REMEMBER HEARING ONE OF MY FRIEND'S DAD SAY DAVID, IT'S THE
LIMIT. 65 IS THE LIMIT.
>> Jimmy: YEAH. >> WHEN YOU HAVE KIDS, IT'S
SOMETHING LIKE YOU DON'T GO 75. THAT'S TOO FAST.
IT'S DANGEROUS. YOU GO TO LIMIT.
AND AS YOU GET OLDER, YOU GO THE LIMIT.
>> Jimmy: YOU STAY WITHIN THE LIMIT.
YEAH. WELL, CONGRATULATIONS ON THE
SHOW AND ON THE CAMPER VAN. >> THANK YOU.
>> Jimmy: EVEN MORE SO. THE SHOW IS "THE FALCON AND THE
WINTER SOLDIER." IT'S AVAILABLE EVERY FRIDAY ON
DISNEY PLUS. WYATT RUSSELL, EVERYBODY.
THANKS, WYATT. WE'LL BE BACK WITH JAZMINE
SULLIVAN. >> "THE JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE
CONCERT SERIES" IS PRESENTED BY MERCEDES-BENZ.
THE BEST OR NOTHING. >> Jimmy: TOMORROW NIGHT AT
9 EASTERN YOU CAN SEE HER FULL PANDORA LIVE POWERED BY WOMEN
CONCERT, WITH A SAMPLE OF THAT NOW FROM HER EP "HEAUX TALES,"
THE SONG IS CALLED "PICK UP YOUR FEELINGS", JAZMINE SULLIVAN!
♪ ♪ SAID THAT I'VE BEEN ACTING
DIFFERENT YEAH ♪ ♪ FUNNY HOW I FINALLY
FLIPPED THE SCRIPT ON YA ♪
♪ WHEN YOU THE ONE WHO'S DOUBLE DIPPIN YA ♪
♪ YOU SO SLOPPY HOW I CAUGHT YOU
SLIPPIN UP ♪ ♪ YOU'RE OFF THE LEASE
RUN ME MY KEYS ♪ ♪ NO MORE POPPIN UP
TO HIT IT YEAH ♪ ♪ I AIN'T GOT THE MILES
TO TRIP ON YA ♪ ♪ NEW PHONE
WHO IS DIS ♪ ♪ BRAND NEW
LIKE THE WHIP ♪ ♪ RACK IT UP
NO ASSIST ♪ ♪ MAIN BITCH I AIN'T AVERAGE,
WAKE UP ♪ ♪ NEED A SIP
HENNESSEY ♪ ♪ TAKE A SIP
I GOT MY JEANS ♪ ♪ I'M TOO THICK
I AIN'T GOT THE ROOM FOR EXTRA BAGGAGE ♪
♪ DON'T FORGET TO COME AND PICK YOUR FEELINGS ♪
♪ DON'T LEAVE NO PIECES YOU NEED TO HURRY
AND PICK UP YOUR FEELINGS ♪ ♪ WHILE I'M UP CLEANING
BOY PLEASE I DON'T NEED YA ♪
♪ MEMORIES ALL THAT [ BLEEP ]
YOU CAN KEEP IT ♪ ♪ DON'T FORGET TO COME
AND PICK UP YOUR FEELINGS DON'T LEAVE NO PIECES ♪
♪ OH I'M TRYINA FIND A [ BLEEP ] TO GIVE FOR YA ♪
♪ YOU RAN OUTTA CHANCES OF FORGIVEN YA ♪
♪ YEAH LISTEN I AIN'T LISTENING ♪
♪ JUST FOR YOU TO GO AND BREAK MY HEART AGAIN ♪
♪ I LEARNED MY LESSON LAST TIME AND
I AIN'T COMING BACK NOW ♪ ♪ THIS IS WHAT YOU HAD NOW
AND I BETCHA I LOOK BETTER DON'T I ♪
♪ NEW PHONE WHO IS DIS ♪
♪ CONTACT DON'T EXIST ♪
♪ NEED A RIDE CALL THAT ♪
♪ GAS WAY TOO EXPENSIVE NO MORE ♪
♪ POP UP VISITS HANDS TIED, NO GRIP ♪
♪ I AIN'T GOT THE ROOM FOR EXTRA BAGGAGE ♪
♪ DON'T FORGET TO COME AND PICK YOUR FEELINGS ♪
♪ DON'T LEAVE NO PIECES YOU NEED TO HURRY
AND PICK UP YOUR FEELINGS ♪ ♪ WHILE I'M UP CLEANING
BOY PLEASE I DON'T NEED YA ♪
♪ MEMORIES ALL THAT [ BLEEP ]
YOU CAN KEEP IT ♪ ♪ DON'T FORGET TO COME
AND PICK UP YOUR FEELINGS DON'T LEAVE NO PIECES ♪
♪ THERE'S A LOCK ON THE DOOR WHERE
MY HEART ONCE WAS MMM ♪ ♪ BUT YOU HAD YOUR FUN
BUT I HAD ENOUGH ♪ ♪ NOW I'M REALLY DONE
I DESERVE SO MUCH MORE THAN YOU GAVE TO ME ♪
♪ NOW I'M SAVING ME AND I MADE MY PEACE ♪
♪ SO YOU CAN RUN THEM STREETS ♪
♪ DON'T FORGET TO COME AND PICK YOUR FEELINGS ♪
♪ DON'T LEAVE NO PIECES YOU NEED TO HURRY
AND PICK UP YOUR FEELINGS ♪ ♪ WHILE I'M UP CLEANING
BOY PLEASE I DON'T NEED YA ♪
♪ MEMORIES ALL THAT [ BLEEP ]
YOU CAN KEEP IT ♪ ♪ DON'T FORGET TO COME
AND PICK UP YOUR FEELINGS DON'T LEAVE NO PIECES ♪
♪ ♪
♪ DON'T LEAVE NO PIECES ♪
>> Jimmy: I WANT TO THANK LIL REL HOWERY, WYATT RUSSELL,
AND JAZMINE SULLIVAN. APOLOGIES TO MATT DAMON.
WE RAN OUT OF TIME FOR HIM. "NIGHTLINE" IS NEXT.
GET THAT MOUTH GUARD IN PLACE AND SOAK IT UP.
GOODNIGHT.