>> Dicky: FROM HOLLYWOOD, IT'S
"JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE!"
TONIGHT, JOHN STAMOS.
L.A. LAKER RUSSELL WESTBROOK.
AND MUSIC FROM ALICE MERTON.
AND NOW, JIMMY KIMMEL!
>> Jimmy: THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
VERY NICE OF YOU.
I'M JIMMY.
I'M THE HOST OF THE SHOW.
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING.
THANK YOU FOR MASKING UP AND
SPREADING OUT TO BE HERE IN OUR
STUDIO.
IN HOLLYWOOD.
IN CALIFORNIA, WHICH, ACCORDING
TO OUR GOVERNOR, WILL BE THE
FIRST STATE TO MANDATE COVID
VACCINATION FOR ALL STUDENTS WHO
GO TO SCHOOL IN‐PERSON.
WHICH IS SOMETHING ‐‐ WELL, NOT
EVERYONE IS HAPPY ABOUT.
ANGRY PARENTS HAVE BEEN
PROTESTING OUTSIDE LOCAL SCHOOL
BOARD MEETINGS.
YOU CAN SEE THEY MADE SIGNS.
THEY ARE NOT YOUR KIDS.
I WON'T CO‐PARENT WITH THE
GOVERNMENT.
THEY DO NOT LIKE THE IDEA OF
REQUIRING KIDS TO GET
VACCINATIONS TO GO TO SCHOOL.
EVEN THOUGH WE'VE BEEN REQUIRING
KIDS TO GET VACCINATIONS TO GO
TO SCHOOL FOR 150 YEARS.
SERIOUSLY.
DID YOU KNOW THIS?
>> NO, JIMMY.
I DIDN'T KNOW.
>> Jimmy: IN THE 1850s, THE
STATE OF MASSACHUSETTS REQUIRED
VACCINATION AGAINST SMALLPOX,
WHICH IS A DISEASE WE DON'T HAVE
ANY LONGER BECAUSE THERE IS A
VACCINE.
BOTTOM LINE.
GET YOUR KIDS VACCINATED.
OR YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO BE WITH
THEM ALL DAY.
YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO HOME
SCHOOL.
AND IF YOU'RE NOT BRIGHT ENOUGH
TO UNDERSTAND THAT VACCINATIONS
ARE SAFE, I'M GOING TO SAY
YOU'RE NOT BRIGHT ENOUGH TO
TEACH THEM GEOMETRY EITHER.
SO IT'S SOMETHING TO THINK
ABOUT.
ON SATURDAY, THE CDC ISSUED
GUIDELINES FOR THE HOLIDAYS.
THEY STILL RECOMMEND HOLDING
GATHERINGS OUTSIDE IF YOU CAN.
WHICH WOULD BE GREAT ON
CHRISTMAS.
BUT IF YOU MUST DO IT INDOORS,
THEY SAY YOU SHOULD OPEN A
WINDOW AND USE A FAN TO KEEP THE
AIR FLOWING.
NOT ONLY DO WINDOW FANS PREVENT
THE VIRUS FROM ACCUMULATING,
THEY ALSO HELP HIDE THE SCENT OF
ALL THE WEED YOU'LL BE SMOKING
TO DEAL WITH ANXIETY OF HAVING
THE HOLIDAYS WITH YOUR FAMILY
AGAIN.
I GUESS IT'S A GOOD SIGN THAT WE
WENT FROM THE CDC TELLING US "BY
NO MEANS SHOULD YOU TRAVEL FOR
HOLIDAYS" TO "TURN ON A FAN."
MY CONCERN IS THAT WE'RE GOING
TO FIND OUT SANTA IS AN
ANTI‐VAXXER.
HE IS AN OLD WHITE GUY IN A RED
HAT.
DON'T BE SURPRISED.
ALL DONALD TRUMP WANTS FOR
CHRISTMAS IS TO GET BACK ON
TWITTER.
HE IS SO ‐‐
TRUMP'S LAWYERS ARE SEEKING TO
OVERTURN HIS TWITTER BAN.
THEY'RE ASKING A FEDERAL JUDGE
TO RESTORE HIS ACCOUNT.
AT LEAST WHILE HIS LAWSUIT
AGAINST TWITTER PLAYS OUT.
TEAM TRUMP ARGUED IN COURT
DOCUMENTS THAT TWITTER
"EXERCISES A DEGREE OF POWER AND
CONTROL OVER POLITICAL DISCOURSE
IN THIS COUNTRY THAT IS
IMMEASURABLE, HISTORICALLY
UNPRECEDENTED, AND PROFOUNDLY
DANGEROUS TO OPEN DEMOCRATIC
DEBATE."
ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT TWITTER
OR TRUMP?
HIS TWEETS WERE LIKE IF FORTUNE
COOKIES HAD DEATH THREATS IN
THEM.
TRUMP IS APPARENTLY UPSET THAT
THE TALIBAN IS ALLOWED TO HAVE
AN ACCOUNT BUT HE IS NOT.
RIGHT.
EXACTLY.
THE FACT THAT YOU HAVE BEEN
DETERMINED TO BE MORE DANGEROUS
THAN THE TALIBAN IS KIND OF ALL
YOU NEED TO KNOW.
BUT TRUMP WASN'T THE ONLY ONE
LOCKED OUT OF HIS SOCIAL MEDIA
ACCOUNTS TODAY.
ALL OF US WERE.
FACEBOOK, INSTAGRAM, AND
WHATSAPP WERE ALL DOWN FOR
HOURS.
HOW MANY OF YOU FRIED TO GET ON
AND DIDN'T GET ON OVER AND OVER
AGAIN TODAY?
STOP DOING THAT.
NOT EVEN 12 HOURS AFTER THE
HASHTAG DELETEFACEBOOK STARTED
TRENDING ON TWITTER AFTER THAT
"60 MINUTES" STORY LAST NIGHT,
FACEBOOK SEEMED TO HAVE DELETED
THEMSELVES.
WE ARE LEARNING MORE ABOUT
FACEBOOK AND WHAT GOES ON INSIDE
THE COMPANY FROM A WHISTLEBLOWER
WHO SPOKE TO "60 MINUTES" LAST
NIGHT.
A WOMAN WHO WORKED IN FACEBOOK'S
CIVIC INTEGRITY UNIT SAID THAT
WHILE NO ONE AT THE COMPANY IS
"MALEVOLENT" OR INTENTIONALLY
TRYING TO SPREAD HATE, THE
COMPANY IS WELL AWARE THAT "THE
VERSION OF FACEBOOK THAT EXISTS
TODAY IS TEARING OUR SOCIETIES
APART AND CAUSING ETHNIC
VIOLENCE AROUND THE WORLD."
WHICH IS IMPORTANT TO HEAR, BUT
HOW IS THIS A SURPRISE?
IT WAS FOUNDED BY THREE FRIENDS
WHO IMMEDIATELY TURNED ON AND
NEVER SPOKE TO EACH OTHER AGAIN.
THE FIRST THREE PEOPLE WHO
THOUGHT OF FACEBOOK NOW HATE
EACH OTHER.
BEFORE FACEBOOK, I HAD NO
PROBLEMS WITH ANY OF MY AUNTS OR
UNCLES.
IT WAS ALL BIRTHDAY CHECKS IN
THE MAIL.
YOU KNOW, SOCIAL MEDIA WASN'T
ALWAYS LIKE THIS.
THERE WAS A TIME WHEN WE HAD
SOMETHING CALLED ‐‐
MYSPACE.
REMEMBER THAT?
MYSPACE WAS A SPECIAL PLACE.
EVERYONE HAD THEIR OWN PAGE.
THEIR OWN SPACE, IF YOU WILL.
DO YOU HEAR THAT?
THAT'S MUSIC.
EVERY PAGE HAD MUSIC BECAUSE
THEY WERE CUSTOMIZABLE.
IT WAS LIKE YOUR OWN PRIVATE
SISQO CONCERT EVERY TIME YOU
CHECKED IN ON TILA TEQUILA.
AND YOU ALWAYS HAD ONE PERSON
YOU COULD DEPEND ON.
NO, NOT HER.
NO, NOT HIM.
I MEAN YES HIM, BUT SOMEONE
ELSE.
THAT'S THE GUY.
TOM.
GOOD OLD TOM.
HE'S DEAD NOW.
NO, TOM ICE ALIVE.
AND THIS IS WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE
TODAY.
HE TURNED OUT TO BE A WINNER
AFTER ALL.
TOM BRADY HAD A HECKUVA
HOMECOMING IN BOSTON LAST NIGHT.
ABOUT 29 MILLION AMERICANS
WATCHED TOM BRADY RETURN TO PLAY
THE TEAM THAT CAST HIM ASIDE.
IT WAS THE SECOND MOST‐WATCHED
SUNDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL GAME EVER.
BRADY AND THE BUCS MANAGED TO
WIN IT THANKS TO A MISSED FIELD
GOAL THAT BOUNCED OFF THE POST
IN THE FINAL MINUTE.
DESPITE A WARM OVATION FROM THE
FANS AT THE BEGINNING OF THE
GAME, BRADY WAS BOOED OFTEN
THROUGHOUT.
AFTER THE GAME, THEY ASKED HIM
HOW HE FELT ABOUT THE BOOS.
HE SAID HE COULDN'T HEAR THEM.
BECAUSE HE HAD THREE SUPER BOWL
RINGS IN EACH EAR.
AND EVEN THOUGH TOM WAS CLEARLY
THE FOCUS, HE DID GET A RUN FOR
HIS MONEY FROM THE PATRIOTS
LNEBACKERS COACH,
STEVE BELICHICK, SON OF BILL,
WHO WAS VERY EXPRESSIVE ON THE
SIDELINES LAST NIGHT.
>> SO NOW WE'RE STARTING TO GET
INTO SOME OF THOSE MOMENTS,
RIGHT?
THESE ARE THOSE TOM BRADY
MOMENTS.
>> Jimmy: THAT DIDN'T LOOK LIKE
A TOM BRADY MOMENT TO ME.
LOOKS TO ME LIKE THE BELICHECK
BOY MIGHT NEED AN EXORCIST.
I'M SURPRISED HIS HEAD DIDN'T
SPIN AROUND.
BUT THE MAIN STORYLINE WAS BRADY
VERSUS HIS OLD COACH,
BILL BELICHICK.
IT WAS THE SPORTS EQUIVALENT OF
WATCHING A KID FIGHT HIS DAD ON
TV.
YOU KNOW I SAW THIS ONLINE.
THIS PHOTO.
WHICH WOULD APPEAR TO BE A
PASSIONATE EMBRACE.
BUT THIS IS WHAT ACTUALLY
HAPPENED.
THEY HUGGED FOR LESS THAN HALF A
SECOND.
IT'S LIKE THE HUG YOU GIVE
SOMEONE WHO SMELLS.
THE PATRIOTS MADE A MISTAKE
LETTING TOM BRADY GO TO FLORIDA.
AND THE FANS KNOW IT.
THIS IS A GUY WHO IS BELOVED IN
NEW ENGLAND.
FROM THE YEARS 2002 TO 2019, IN
THE SIX STATES THAT MAKE UP
NEW ENGLAND, THOUSANDS OF BABY
BOYS AND EVEN GIRLS WERE
NAMED BRADY.
EVEN WITH LARRY BIRD, WHO IS AS
BELOVED IN BOSTON AS ANYONE, YOU
DIDN'T SEE A BIG SPIKE IN THE
NUMBER OF LARRYS.
YOU DIDN'T MEET ANY GIRLS NAMED
LARRY, OKAY?
SO, WITH TOM RETURNING FOR THE
FIRST TIME, IT WAS AN EMOTIONAL
NIGHT FOR BOSTON SPORTS FANS.
AND SO TONIGHT, I THOUGHT WE
SHOULD CHECK IN WITH THE MOST
EMOTIONAL OF THEM ALL.
A CHILD WHO WAS NAMED TWICE
AFTER THE GREATEST QUARTERBACK
OF ALL‐TIME.
FROM SEEKONK, MASSACHUSETTS,
LET'S SAY HELLO TO 2‐YEAR‐OLD‐
TOMMY BRADY FITZPATRICK.
HI, TOMMY, HOW ARE YOU HOLDING
UP?
>> WHO THE HELL IS THAT?
>> Jimmy: JIMMY KIMMEL.
>> OH FOR PETE'S SAKE, KIMBLE.
IT'S NOT BAD ENOUGH YOU RUINED
"PAW PATROL" FOR ME, NOW YOU'RE
RUINING MY NAP TIME.
GREAT!
I'M TRYIN' TO SLEEP ONE OFF OVER
HERE, YOU FRUIT BAT!
>> Jimmy: I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT.
I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT THE
BUCCANEERS BEATING THE PATRIOTS
LAST NIGHT.
I WOULD IMAGINE THAT HAD TO BE
HARD FOR YOU.
>> HARD?
THAT HAD TO BE HARD YOU SAY?
IT WAS A FRIGGIN' ROLLERCOASTER!
I WENT THROUGH ALL THE STAGES OF
GRIEF!
FIRST ONE BEIN' DENIAL.
"THERE'S NO WAY THAT TRAITOR
WILL SHOW HIS FACE IN FOXBOROUGH
EVER AGAIN!
THEN CAME STAGE TWO, ANGER.
[ BLEEP ] YOU TOMMY!
HOW DARE YOU COME BACK HERE WITH
A FLORIDA PIRATE ON YOUR HELMET.
LIKE SOME KIND OF SWASHBUCKLIN'
BONER EATER!
GO PATS!
PATS FOREVER!
I HOPE WE SNAP YOUR [ BLEEP ]
SPINE!
>> Jimmy: THAT SEEMS A LITTLE
HARSH FOR YOUR HERO.
YOU'RE NAMED AFTER HIM.
>> FAIR POINT.
IT WAS A LITTLE OUT OF HAND.
AND THAT'S WHERE THE NEXT STAGE
CAME IN.
BARGAINING.
"PLEASE GOD, LET TOUCHDOWN TOMMY
HAVE A CHANGE OF HEART, AND
SWITCH TO A PATS JERSEY
HALFTIME LIKE HE'S M. NIGHT
FRIGGIN' SHYAMALAN!"
>> Jimmy: THAT SEEMS OPTIMISTIC.
IT'S UNLIKELY THAT HE'D CHANGE
JERSEYS DURING THE GAME.
SEEMS UNLIKELY TO ME.
>> YEAH NO DOY, YOU DONG
KNOCKER.
THERE'S A BETTER CHANCE OF ME
FINDING THE WINNING POWERBALL
TICKET IN MY DIAPER.
SO THAT'S WHERE STAGE FOUR
KICKED IN.
DRINKING.
>> Jimmy: WAIT.
I THINK STAGE FOUR IS
DEPRESSION.
NOT DRINKING.
>> OH I'M SORRY.
ARE YOU A PSYCHO‐CHIATRIST NOW?
I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS ON HERE WITH
DR. FRIGGIN' PHIL.
>> Jimmy: WHAT'S THAT YOU'RE
DRINKING BY THE WAY, BABY TOMMY?
>> WELL IF YOU MUST KNOW, KAREN,
I CALL IT THE LYNNFIELD LATTE.
IT'S BREAST MILK AND HARD CIDAR.
PACKS A PUNCH!
ANYWAY, THE DRINKING USHERED IN
STAGE FIVE, VIOLENCE.
THAT'S WHEN THINGS GET HAZY AND
DARK.
APPARENTLY I CHEWED THE EAR OFF
A COP.
GOT LOCKED UP.
SLEPT IT OFF.
WHO CARES?
MISDEMEANOR.
I'VE DONE WORSE.
BELIEVE YOU ME!
>> Jimmy: I BELIEVE IT, I
BELIEVE IT.
>> AND I GOT TO STAGE SIX,
NOSTALGIA.
STAGE SEVEN, DESPAIR.
STAGE EIGHT, DIARRHEA.
AND NOW I AM AT STAGE NINE.
SELF LOATHING.
>> Jimmy: I THINK THE LAST STAGE
IS SUPPOSED TO BE ACCEPTANCE.
NOT SELF LOATHING.
>> WELL, WHAT I'VE ACCEPTED IS
THAT LIFE SUCKS AND YOU SUCK AND
GOD SUCKS AND THIS CITY SUCKS A
BIG ONE TOO!
EVERY TOWN IN NEW ENGLAND IS
WORSE THAN THE NEXT.
FROM SOMMERVILLE TO SEEKONK.
FROM METHUEN TO MEDWAY.
FROM NEWTON UPPER FALLS TO
NEWBURYPORT.
FROM WOONSOCKET TO
WINNIPESAUKEE!!
IT'S ALL GARBAGE!
GARBAGE TOWNS, GARBAGE PLACES.
TOMMY, TAKE ME TO TAMPA!
I WANNA FEEL THAT WARM FLORIDA
SUN ON MY BABY NUTS!
[ BLEEP ]
>> Jimmy: WOW, I NEVER THOUGHT
I'D SEE THE DAY YOU'D TURN YOUR
BACK ON NEW ENGLAND.
>> YOU MEAN LIKE HOW TOM TURNED
HIS BACK ON ALL OF US?
>> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW THAT HE
DID THAT.
>> YOU WANT TO FIGHT ME?
YOU WANT MY PERSIMMON SIZED
FISTS UP YOUR TOOT CHUTE?
IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?
BECAUSE BRING IT ON!
>> Jimmy: NO, NO.
I DON'T WANT THAT.
THANKS FOR CHATTING WITH US.
YOU CAN GO BACK TO YOUR NAP NOW.
>> YEAH.
YOU'D LIKE THAT WOULDN'T YOU,
YOU [ BLEEP ] CREEPER?
YOU'D LIKE TO WATCH ME SLEEP.
YOU CREEPY WEIRDO WITH ALL OF
YOUR WEIRD HOLLYWOOD FRIENDS,
LIKE UNCLE JESSE STAMOS!
>> Jimmy: THAT'S
TOMMY BRADY FITZPATRICK.
>> I MISS YOU TOMMY TERRIFIC!
COME BACK!
>> Jimmy: ONE MORE THING, WHILE
WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT OF
LEGENDARY PATS.
I WANT TO MENTION THAT
PAT ROBERTSON, THE 700 YEAR‐OLD
HOST OF "THE 700 CLUB",
PAT ROBERTSON, AFTER ALMOST
60 YEARS ON TELEVISION NEARLY
EVERY DAY, HAS FINALLY STEPPED
DOWN.
FRIDAY WAS PAT'S FINAL SHOW.
OVER THE YEARS, HE HAS GIVEN SO
MUCH TO SO MANY OF OUR
MONOLOGUES, THAT WE WANTED TO
GIVE SOMETHING BACK.
SO WE COMBED THROUGH THE
ARCHIVES AND HERE THEY ARE NOW.
AS WE SAY FAREWELL, SOME OF THE
ALL‐TIME GREATEST PAT ROBERTSON
MOMENTS.
>> WELCOME, FOLKS.
WE GOT A GREAT PROGRAM FOR YOU.
YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS ANYTHING.
ESPECIALLY THAT STRIPPER VISITED
BY DEMONS.
COCAINE IS A PRODUCT OF A
VEGETABLE.
ALCOHOL IS A PRODUCT OF A
VEGETABLE.
MARIJUANA IS A VEGETABLE.
I'VE BEEN TO CHINA SEVERAL
TIMES.
I HAVE SEEN ONE OF THE BIGGEST
McDONALD'S IN THE WORLD.
I'M A FAN OF BEANS.
ALL KINDS OF BEANS.
YOU'VE GOT TO BE CAREFUL.
THE TOWELS COULD HAVE AIDS.
YOU MUST BE NICE TO FAT PEOPLE.
MOST GAYS DON'T WANT PIZZA, THEY
WANT CAKE.
HOW COME JEWS HAVE MORE MONEY
THAN A LOT OF PEOPLE?
I'VE GOT AN UNCONTROLLABLE URGE
TO WATCH PORNOGRAPHY.
DO YOU DO BODY WAXING.
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TAKE YOUR
TOP OFF AND DANCE AROUND A
LITTLE BIT.
>> IS THAT A BLACK THING?
>> IT'S A BLACK THING, PAT.
I WAS DOING SOME MOVES KIND OF
LIKE WHAT THEY DO IN THE
OLYMPICS.
WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE.
>> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW ABOUT
THAT.
THANK YOU, PAT.
WE'VE GOT A GOOD SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT.
THE NEW LOS ANGELES LAKER
RUSSELL WESTBROOK IS WITH US.
WE HAVE MUSIC FROM ALICE MERTON.
AND WE'LL BE BACK WITH
JOHN STAMOS.
STICK AROUND.
♪
>> Jimmy: TONIGHT, HIS NEW
SHOWTIME DOCUMENTARY IS CALLED
"PASSION PLAY."
FROM THE LOS ANGELES LAKERS,
RUSSELL WESTBROOK IS HERE.
[ APPLAUSE ]
THEN LATER, SHE IS A
SINGER‐SONGWRITER ALL THE WAY
FROM GERMANY.
HER SONG IS CALLED "VERTIGO."
ALICE MERTON FROM THE
MERCEDES‐BENZ STAGE.
[ APPLAUSE ]
THIS WEEK, WE HAVE NEW SHOWS
WITH JAMES BOND HIMSELF,
DANIEL CRAIG, RAMI MALEK,
ELLEN POMPEO, HENRY WINKLER.
AND WE'LL HAVE MUSIC FROM
X AMBASSADORS, OLD DOMINION, AND
BILLY IDOL.
[ APPLAUSE ]
OUR FIRST GUEST OF THE WEEK IS A
GRECO‐AMERICAN TREASURE WHOSE
SMILE COULD LIGHT UP EVEN THE
DARKEST DEMON'S SOUL.
SEASON ONE OF HIS HIGH SCHOOL
BASKETBALL SERIES "BIG SHOT" IS
ON DISNEY PLUS NOW.
PLEASE SAY HELLO TO JOHN STAMOS.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪
>> THE WALK OUT FEELS SO GOOD.
>> Jimmy: YOU COME OUT, PEOPLE
HERE.
>> IT'S NICE TO SEE ALL OF YOU.
[ APPLAUSE ]
ONE OF THE THINGS I MISS IS THE
WHISPER.
YOU EVER WATCH LIKE WHEN THE
GUEST COMES OUT, THE HOST, THEY
WOULD SHAKE HANDS AND WHISPER.
EVER WONDER WHAT WE SAY?
I PUT TOGETHER SOMETHING, JIM.
>> Jimmy: YOU DID?
JOHN STAMOS.
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> I JUST HAD SEX WITH YOUR
WIFE.
>> Jimmy: JOHN STAMOS.
>> WHAT'S UP, JIM?
I TOOK THREE VIAGRA.
>> Jimmy: YOU KNOW WHAT?
I REMEMBER THAT.
I STILL REMEMBER THAT.
>> FULL DISCLOSURE, I DID NOT
HAVE SEX WITH YOUR WIFE.
I DID TAKE THREE VIE YAG A.
THAT WAS ABOUT A YEAR AGO.
I THINK I'M GOOD NOW.
>> Jimmy: VERY GOOD TO SEE YOU.
>> I HAVE A BONE TO PICK YOU.
>> Jimmy: WE'VE GONE FROM THREE
VIAGRA TO A BONE.
>> I WAS LISTENING TO YOU ON
"HOWARD" RECENTLY.
>> Jimmy: ON THE "HOWARD STERN"
SHOW.
>> HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THIS
THING.
>> Jimmy: THE RING, I HAVE IT
ON.
>> I BOUGHT ONE BECAUSE OF YOU
GUYS.
TELL THEM ABOUT IT.
IT REDUCES STRESS.
>> Jimmy: WELL ‐‐
>> IT HELPS YOU SLEEP.
>> Jimmy: IN SOME PEOPLE IT
INCREASES STRESS.
>> THAT'S THE THING, I LOST
MINE.
>> Jimmy: IT MEASURES YOUR HEART
BEAT, I GUESS.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT DOES.
BUT I LIKE LOOKING AT THE APP
THAT SAYS YOU HAD A VERY GOOD
NIGHT'S SLEEP LAST NIGHT.
>> I HAVEN'T, BECAUSE I CAN'T
FIND MINE.
IT TRACKS YOUR SLEEP AND YOUR
STRESS LEVEL.
IT DOESN'T TRACK ITSELF.
YOU CAN'T FIND IT.
>> Jimmy: YOU'RE RIGHT.
>> AND IT'S VERY EXPENSIVE.
>> Jimmy: I LOST ONE, TOO.
>> JENNIFER ANISTON HAD IT AND
LOST HERS.
>> Jimmy: SHE LOST HERS TOO?
I THINK THEY WANT YOU TO LOSE
THEM.
I KEEP TALKING LIKE THIS AND I
KEEP THINKING THE MAIL WILL COME
WITH A WHOLE BOX OF THESE
THINGS.
I ALMOST LOST IT TODAY.
>> TERRIBLE.
>> Jimmy: YOU'RE RIGHT, THEY
SHOULD BE ABLE TO TRACK THEM.
>> I AM MORE STRESSED BECAUSE I
HAVE LESS SLEEP.
BUT I'M HAPPY TO BE HERE.
IN
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: HOW IS YOUR BOY,
BILLY, IS HE 3 YEARS OLD NOW?
>> 3.
>> Jimmy: I HAVE A 4‐YEAR‐OLD
BILLY.
>> HOW DO YOU KEEP THEM ALIVE?
>> Jimmy: HE'S TRYING TO KILL US
IS WHAT IT IS.
HE WAKES UP BEFORE THE SUN.
>> SAME WITH MINE.
HE'S POT XTY TRAINED PRETTY WEL
THAT.
HAPPENED FAST.
I WENT IN AND SAW HIM, DAD, I
HAVE TO PEE.
THIS IS HOW HE PEES ON THE
TOILET LIKE THIS.
>> Jimmy: REALLY?
>> HE'S LIKE ‐‐ AND THEN HE GOES
INTO A DOWNWARD DOG.
HE'S LIKE WIPE, WIPE.
GOT TO RUSH IN AND WIPE.
>> Jimmy: DID HE LEARN THAT FROM
THE CAT OR SOMETHING?
>> NO, ME.
AND THE MUSIC, I DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU GUYS PLAY TO YOUR KIDS.
BUT HE LOVES BETELGEUSE.
AND HE MET BETELGEUSE AT
UNIVERSAL STUDIOS.
IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN MATT DAMON.
SO HE'S BECOME OBSESSED WITH
BETELGEUSE.
THERE'S A BROADWAY MUSICAL
VERSION OF "BETELGEUSE.
"HE GOT HOOKED ON THE MUSICAL,
THE SOUNDTRACK.
THE OPENING SONG IS CALLED THE
WHOLE BEING DEAD THING.
FIRST YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN WHAT
THAT MEANS.
THE LYRICS ARE, LIKE, YOU'RE
GOING TO BE FINE ON THE OTHER
SIDE, DIE, MOTHER [ BLEEP ],
DIE, DIE.
HE'S BACK THERE SINGING IT.
AND MY WIFE IS LIKE, SHOULD WE
NOT ‐‐ NO, NO, DON'T MAKE ATE
BIG DEAL.
IF HE KNOWS IT'S A BAD WORD, HE
WILL SAY IT.
AT WHAT POINT DO YOU TELL HIM,
BECAUSE HE'S GOING TO THE
TEACHER SAYING DIE, MOTHER
[ BLEEP ], DIE.
>> Reporter: WHEN HE SAYS THAT
TO THE TEACHER AT SHOW AND TELL.
WOW, BECAUSE SOMETIMES YOU DO
HEAR THINGS AND THEN YOU DON'T
WANT THEM TO HEAR, BUT THEY HEAR
EVERYTHING AND THEY KNOW
EVERYTHING.
BUT IF YOU REACT IN ANY WAY,
LIKE WE WATCHED "E. T." AND THE
KIDS SAPY PENIS BREATH AND MY
KIDS WERE SO DELIGHTED.
I JUST KNEW THEY WERE GOING TO
BE LINE OH, YES, PENIS BREATH
AND NOW IT'S PART OF THEIR
VOCABULARY.
THEY ALSO LOVE SAYING THE WORD
"BUTT HOLE."
THAT IS ANOTHER WORD THEY LOVE.
>> IT'S A FUNNY WORD.
>> Jimmy: BUT IT'S A STEP TOO
FAR.
BUTT'S FINE, BUT WHEN IT GETS
INTO THAT, LIKE THAT'S TOO MUCH.
>> YES, IT IS.
>> Jimmy: BUT THE MORE I TRY TO
TELL THEM THAT IT'S TOO MUCH ‐‐
>> THE MORE THEY SAY IT.
WE OUGHT TO GET RID OF THEM, ALL
TOGETHER.
[ LAUGHTER ]
I LOVE IT.
>> Jimmy: ARE YOU HAVING FUN?
>> HE'S A BEAUTIFUL BOY.
>> Jimmy: ARE YOU MOLDING HIM IN
YOUR IMAGE?
>> NO.
I TRY TO, BUT HE'S NOT BUYING
IT.
THERE'S ONE SCENE ON "FULL
HOUSE" WHERE A MONKEY IS
SPANKING MY BUTT.
THAT HE LIKES.
BUT ANYTHING ELSE, HE WON'T ‐‐
>> Jimmy: I NEVER SAW MY DAD GET
SPANKED ON THE BUTT BY A MONKEY.
DO YOU SHARE WISDOM OR IS HE TOO
YOUNG FOR THAT?
>> WELL, YOU HAV TO, RIGHT?
ONE OF THE THINGS ‐‐ YOU KNOW
HOW ‐‐ THEY ALL HAVE A. D. D.,
THESE KIDS.
>> Jimmy: WELL, THEY DON'T.
IT'S JUST THAT HE'S 3.
DON'T WORRY.
YOU KNOW LIKE WHEN THEY SAY THIS
PERSON HAS THE ATTENTION OF A
3‐YEAR‐OLD, THAT'S WHY.
>> HE'LL DO SOMETHING AND THEN
QUIT.
I'LL SAY NO, ONCE YOU TRY, IF AT
FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED, TRY,
TRY AGAIN.
YESTERDAY HE WAS AT A PLAY DATE
AND HE WENT TO KISS SOME KID AND
THE KID DIDN'T WANT IT.
AND HE WAS LIKE, MY DAD TOLD ME,
TRY, TRY AGAIN.
>> Jimmy: YOU'VE GOT SOME
TROUBLE ON YOUR HANDS.
>> HE'S TOO CHARMING.
>> Jimmy: I WANT TO EMBARRASS
YOU FOR A SECOND.
I WANT TO READ SOMETHING.
OVER THE SUMMER, ROBERT LLOYD, A
WRITER FROM L. A. TIMES WROTE A
STORY, AND THE HEADLINE IS JOHN
STAMOS IS ONE OF TVs MOST
UNDERRATED ACTORS.
IT'S TIME HE RECEIVED HIS DUE.
>> YOU SURE MY MOTHER DIDN'T
WRITE THAT?
WHAT A NICE THING.
>> Jimmy: IT'S REALLY LIKE AN
EXAMINATION OF YOUR WHOLE
CAREER, AND YOUR ‐‐ REALLY, I
THINK YOU KNOW WHAT?
HE'S PROBABLY RIGHT.
I THINK MAYBE LOOKING LIKE THIS
HAS MADE PEOPLE TAKE YOU NOT SO
SERIOUSLY.
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
SEE, I'M GETTING HYPNOTIZED.
I'M FALLING FOR YOU RIGHT NOW.
HE WROTE THIS, HE'S MORE
INTERESTING LOOKING THAN A
CLOONEY, PITT OR DAMON.
DEFINITELY DAMON.
HIS SMILE IS WAYWARD, GOING THIS
WAY AND THAT.
>> WHAT DO YOU MEAN, GOING THIS
WAY?
THAT'S LIKE IF YOU SAY SOMEBODY
HAS PRETTY BLUE EYES.
>> Jimmy: I CAN SEE YOU'RE
GETTING UPTIGHT ABOUT GETTING
COMPLIMENTED.
BUT RELAX AND LISTEN.
TAKE IT IN.
IT'S NICE TO HAVE SOMEBODY SAY
SOMETHING NICE.
HIS SMILE IS WAYWARD, GOING IN
WAY AND THAT.
HIS BOTTOM TEETH ARE JUST A
LITTLE CRACKED.
IT FEELS ALMOST LIKE A RADICAL
AUTHENTICITY IN A HOLLYWOOD
STAR.
>> I HAVE A CONFESSION.
I GOT THEM FIXED.
>> Jimmy: AFTER THIS ARTICLE?
YOU LOST YOUR LOOK OF
AUTHENTICITY.
>> I DON'T CARE.
>> Jimmy: SO THIS ARTICLE THAT
IS 100% NICE FROM BEGINNING TO
END, WHAT YOU TOOK OUT OF IT IS
I NEED TO FIX MY TEETH?
>> WELL, HE SAID THEY WERE
WAYWARD.
>> Jimmy: I SEE WHY YOUR SON IS
NOT LISTENING TO YOU.
JOHN STAMOS IS HERE.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
>> Jimmy: JOHN STAMOS IS WITH
US.
HIS SHOW "BIG SHOT" IS ON DISNEY
PLUS.
YOU'VE BEEN RENEWED FOR SEASON
TWO.
CONGRATULATIONS ON THAT.
[ APPLAUSE ]
THAT'S A GOOD THING.
YOU SAW THE SHOW, RIGHT?
>> I DID.
>> Jimmy: YOU PLAY THIS GIRL'S
BASKETBALL COACH, THE COACH OF A
GIRL'S HIGH SCHOOL TEAM.
I KNOW YOU KNOW, THIS I'M
TELLING THE AUDIENCE.
YOU WERE LIKE AN NCAA MEN'S
BASKETBALL COACH, AND THIS WAS
LIKE A STEP DOWN FOR YOU.
YOU THOUGHT.
>> THAT'S WHAT HE THOUGHT, BUT
IT WASN'T.
HERE'S A GUY WHO GOES IN WITH
THESE PRECONCEIVED IDEA OF WHAT
FEMALE SPORTS SHOULD BE, AND I'M
JUST BLOWN AWAY.
A CRUSTY OLD, JERKY ‐‐ HIS
IDEALS WERE JUST SO OUTDATED.
AND IT'S BEAUTIFUL TO WATCH THE
GUY JUST CHANGE LIKE THAT AND
PLAY OUT THROUGH A WHOLE SEASON.
AND I'M SO GRATEFUL FOR DISNEY
PICKING IT UP.
THERE'S SO MANY ANALYTICS THAT
DIDN'T WORK HERE, IT WORKED
HERE, AND IT WAS LIKE ‐‐ YOU
KNOW, WE DON'T KNOW, WE'RE
TRYING TO FIGURE IT OUT.
I SAID, THIS IS WHAT DISNEY IS
TO ME.
IT'S INCLUSION, HEART, GUTS.
AND THEY HAD THE GUTS GO, WE'RE
GOING TO PICK IT UP.
>> Jimmy: YOU ALSO HAVE THIS
PODCAST.
IT'S SOMETHING VERY CLOSE TO
YOUR HEARD.
IT'S A PODCAST ABOUT ‐‐ AND I
DON'T THINK A LOT OF YOUNGER
PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT THIS.
THE KIDNAPPING OF FRANK SINATRA,
JR.
>> IT'S A FASCINATING STORY
ABOUT THIS GUY WHO WAS AT THE
LOWEST POINT IN HIS LIFE, AND
HE'S IN HIS CAR, AND ON THE
RADIO, GOD'S VOICE CAME AND SAID
KIDNAP SOMEONE TO GET OUT OF
YOUR TROUBLES.
HE KIDNAPPED FRANK SINATRA, JR.
>> Jimmy: WHO WAS HOW OLD AT
THAT TIME?
>> 19.
NOBODY KNOWS ABOUT THIS.
HE WAS NOT AT ‐‐ THIS GUY BARRY
KEENAN.
HE'S 81 NOW, MY GOOD BUDDY.
I DIDN'T WANT TO GLORIFY IT,
BECAUSE I HAVE A SON AND THE
IDEA OF KIDS BEING KIDNAPPED IS
TERRIBLE.
IT'S REALLY ‐‐ I GOT TO TAKE A
REAL DEEP DIVE INTO THIS
THE TRUTH IS, HE WAS MENTALLY
ILL.
I GOT TO SEE HOW LOW A PERSON
HAS TO GET AND THE EXTREMES THEY
HAVE TO GO THROUGH TO GET OUT OF
IT.
IT'S A FASCINATING STUDY IN
MENTAL ILLNESS AND A GUY PLAGUED
WITH CATHOLICISM AND DOING THE
RIGHT THING.
WE WANTED TO GET TO THAT STATE
OF GRACE AND IT'S INTERESTING.
>> Jimmy: DOES IT SURPRISE YOU
AT ALL SINATRA DIDN'T HAVE HIM
KILLED?
>> HE TRIED, THREE TIMES.
BUT THE HITMAN ‐‐ IT'S LIKE
KATO, FOR 50 YEARS, HE WAS SHOT
AT THREE OR FOUR TIMES.
THE LAST TIME, THE HITMAN HAD
HIM IN HIS SIGHTS AND HIS
COLOSTOMY BAG BROKE AND HE
MISSED HIM.
>> Jimmy: YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE
A WONDERFUL THING TO DO FOR
FRANK?
KILL THAT GUY.
>> WE COULD TELL THE STORY,
BECAUSE FRANK'S DEAD.
>> Jimmy: FRANK HAS PASSED AWAY.
IT SOUNDS LIKE FRANK DIDN'T HAVE
A LOT OF FIREPOWER BEHIND HIM.
YOU KNOW, WE ALL THOUGHT FRANK
WOULD GO LIKE THIS AND YOU WOULD
JUST COLLAPSE.
AND IT TURNS OUT THAT MAYBE NOT
AS WELL CONNECTED.
>> INTERESTING STORY, THOUGH.
>> Jimmy: VERY GOOD TO SEE YOU.
JOHN STAMOS, EVERY BODY.
"BIG SHOT" IS ON DISNEY PLUS
NOW.
WE'LL BE BACK WITH
RUSSELL WESTBROOK.
>> Jimmy: MUSIC FROM
ALICE MERTON IS ON THE WAY.
OUR NEXT GUEST IS A NINE‐TIME
NBA ALL‐STAR.
TWO‐TIME SCORING CHAMP.
MOST VALUABLE PLAYER, SNAPPY
DRESSER, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY TO
US, A NEW LOS ANGELES LAKER.
YOU CAN LEARN ALL ABOUT HIM IN A
NEW DOCUMENTARY.
"PASSION PLAY" PREMIERES
OCTOBER 15th ON SHOWTIME.
PLEASE SAY HELLO TO NUMBER ZERO,
RUSSELL WESTBROOK.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪
>> Jimmy: I'M EXCITED YOU'RE
HERE.
NOT JUST AS A TALK SHOW HOST BUT
AS A LAKERS' FAN I'M EXCITED
THAT YOU'RE HERE.
>> ME, TOO.
I'M HAPPY.
>> Jimmy: WERE YOU ALWAYS
PLANNING TO COME HERE, WAS IT
ALWAYS IN THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD?
>> SECRETLY, YES.
>> Jimmy: BECAUSE IT'S YOUR
HOMETOWN.
>> I THINK EVERY PLAYER WANTS TO
EVENTUALLY PLAY AT HOME.
AND I THINK NOW THE TIMING IS
RIGHT, THE TEAM IS RIGHT,
EVERYTHING IS IN LINE.
>> Jimmy: WHAT'S THE BEST THING
ABOUT BEING HOME?
>> BEING ABLE TO BE WITH MY KIDS
AND MY FAMILY, MY MOM, MY DAD,
MY BROTHER, MY CLOSE FRIENDS,
HAVING AN OPPORTUNITY TO BE ABLE
TO SEE MY KIDS GROW UP AND NOT
BE GOING BACK AND FORTH.
TO ME THAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT.
>> Jimmy: WHAT'S THE WORST THING
ABOUT PLAYING AT HOME?
THERE HAS TO BE SOME NEGATIVES.
>> EVERY DAY, IT'S A BIRTHDAY
PARTY.
MY PARTS, FRIENDS, THAT'S THE
WORST PART.
>> Jimmy: ONCE THE SEASON
STARTS, YOU'VE GOT A REALLY GOOD
EXCUSE TO NOT GO TO ANY OF THAT
STUFF.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
>> Jimmy: HOW MANY TICKETS DO
YOU HAVE TO GET FOR THE FIRST
HOME GAME?
WHAT ARE YOU EXPECTED TO DELIVER
FOR THE FAMILY?
>> RIGHT NOW IT'S VERY QUIET.
I KNOW BY OCTOBER 15th‐ISH, IT'S
GOING TO GET UGLY.
>> Jimmy: SHOULD THEY ASK YOU
EARLIER, OR IS IT BETTER TO WAIT
TILL RIGHT BEFORE?
>> DON'T ASK ME AT ALL.
>> Jimmy: DO YOU HAVE SOMEBODY
THAT YOU CAN GO HEY, CALL DAVE
OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT?
>> I HAVE A FEW OF THOSE PEOPLE.
BUT I'VE ALREADY TOLD THEM, AS
WELL, WE'RE NOT DOING IT.
>> Jimmy: NOT DOING THAT?
>> WE'RE NOT DOING IT.
MY PARENTS, WIFE, KIDS WILL BE
THERE.
FAMILY, CLOSE ONES, THAT'S IT.
>> Reporter: HAVE YOU BEEN TO
TACO TUESDAY AT LeBRON'S HOUSE
YET?
>> NO.
I HAVEN'T GOTTEN THE INVITE YET.
>> Jimmy: YOU AND LeBRON AND
ANTHONY DAVIS AND CARMELO
ANTHONY PLAYED ON THE OLYMPIC
TEAM IN WHAT, 2012 SNAFS
>> YEAH.
I THINK ANTHONY WAS JUST BORN AT
THE TIME.
>> Jimmy: AT THAT TIME, DID YOU
GUYS DISCUSS ‐‐ DID ANY OF YOU
SAY WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT IF WE
COULD PLAY TOGETHER?
>> IT'S CRAZY, BECAUSEMELO IN O.
WE NEVER TALKED ABOUT PLAYING
WITH EACH OTHER.
ME AND BRON HAVE BEEN FRIENDS
AND IT NEVER CAME UP.
AND THEN THIS SUMMER, BOOM.
THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW I'M A
LAKER.
IT HAPPENED SO QUICK.
WE TALKED BEFORE, BUT NOTHING
ABOUT ‐‐
>> Jimmy: THEY DIDN'T TRY TO
TELL YOU ON COMING HERE?
>> NOT TOO MUCH YOU HAVE TO SELL
ABOUT COMING TO L. A.
EASY SELL.
>> Jimmy: INTERESTING.
I DON'T KNOW IF YOU SAW THIS,
BUT YOU'RE ALREADY ON A MURAL
HERE IN TOWN.
AN ARTIST NAMED ROYAL DOG
PAINTED YOU.
AND YOU CAN SEE YOU AND LeBRON,
WHICH IS PRETTY COOL.
ALSO, THAT'S MY TRANS AM.
IT'S WEIRD THAT IT HAPPENS TO BE
IN THAT SHOT.
I PARKED IT RIGHT BETWEEN THOSE
TWO TRUCKS.
THAT'S A NICE WELCOME HOME,
ISN'T IT?
>> THESE AMAZING.
I CAN'T WAIT TO GO BY AND SEE
IT.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE IT IS, BUT
WHEN I FIND OUT, I'M GOING TO GO
SEE IT.
>> Jimmy: WE'LL TELL YOU WHERE
IT IS.
YOU ARE THE ALL‐TIME NBA LEADER
WHEN IT COMES TO TRIPLE‐DOUBLES,
WHICH IS REALLY AMAZING.
[ APP
[ APPLAUSE ]
TRIPLE‐DOUBLES IS POINTS,
REBOUNDS, ASSISTS, OR STEALS
ALSO.
YOU CAN GET A QUADRUPLE DOUBLE
THEORETICALLY.
>> YES.
>> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW IF
ANYBODY EVER HAS.
>> A FEW PEOPLE.
>> Jimmy: SO IS THAT SOMETHING
YOU'RE AWARE OF WHEN YOU'RE
PLAYING?
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?
SOMETIMES THROUGHOUT THE GAME
YOU KIND OF ‐‐ IT CAN FEEL LIKE
YOU'RE GETTING CLOSE.
YOU HAVE NINE OR TEN ASSIST,
POINTS, REBOUNDS.
YOU OBVIOUSLY SEE THE STATS.
BUT FOR ME, WHEN I'M PLAYING, I
TRY NOT TO GET TRIPLE‐DOUBLES
THAT ARE LIKE 10, 10, 10.
I LIKE TO GET OUTRAGEOUS AND GO
20, 20, 20.
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: I THINK I SAID THIS TO
YOU LAST TIME YOU WERE HERE, AND
I'M GOING TO SAY IT AGAIN, YOU
SEEM SO INTENSE AND FEARSOME ON
THE COURT.
AND THEN YOU SEEM AS NICE AS CAN
BE IN REAL LIFE.
I GUESS THAT'S KIND OF WHAT THE
DOCUMENTARY SHOWS.
>> YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M SUPER EXCITED ABOUT THE DOC.
I HOPE EVERYONE ACROSS THE WORLD
GETS TO SEE IT.
THE REASON I DID IT IS FOR THAT
EXACT REASON.
A LOT OF PEOPLE SEE ME ON THE
FLOOR, I'M VERY PASSIONATE AND I
LIKE TO COMPETE AT A HIGH LEVEL.
BUT PEOPLE THINK THAT'S WHO I
AM, AND THAT'S ‐‐
>> Jimmy: LINE THE NBA VERSION
OF RESTING BITCH FACE.
YOU SEEM MAD, BUT YOU'RE NOT
MAD.
>> NO, I'M JUST COMPETING.
AND THEN MY PASSION PLAY GIVES
THE VIEWERS AN OPPORTUNITY TO
BETTER SEE WHO I AM ON A
DAY‐TO‐DAY BASIS.
THE THINGS I LOVE TO DO, THE
THINGS I DON'T LIKE TO DO.
WHO I GENUINELY AM.
>> Jimmy: DO YOU MIND SHARING
THE STORY YOU SHARED ABOUT
PLAYING AGAINST KOBE BRYANT IN
COLLEGE IF
>> THIS ONE TIME GOING INTO MY
SOPHOMORE SEASON AT UCLA, A LOT
OF PICKUP GAMES AT UCLA WOULD
HAPPEN.
A LOT OF SUPERSTARS WOULD COME.
THIS PARTICULAR DAY, KOBE CAME.
AND NOW I'M SUPER HYPED AND
SUPER JUICED.
>> Jimmy: HOW OLD ARE YOU AT
THIS POINT?
>> 16, 17.
I'M SUPER HYPED, AND I'M JUST
EXCITED TO COMPETE, BECAUSE TO
ME, KOBE IS THE BEST IN THE
WORLD.
>> Jimmy: YEAH.
>> I HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO
COMPETE AND THEN KOBE, YOU KNOW,
NOT GOING BACK AND FORTH BECAUSE
HE WAS BASICALLY KILLING ME.
BUT THAT'S OKAY.
BUT THE NUMBER ONE LESSON I GOT
IN THAT, WATCHING HIM AND TO
THIS DAY, I THINK WE ALL KNOW
THE MAMBA MENTALITY.
BUT WHEN I WAS YOUNGER AND
WATCHING HIM, HE WAS COMPETING
LIKE IT WAS THE FINALS.
TO ME, IT WAS SO INSPIRING,
BECAUSE IT ALLOWED ME TO
UNDERSTAND THIS IS WHAT YOU NEED
TO BE LIKE, REGARD LSLESS OF WH
YOU ARE.
AND I TOOK THAT AND RAN WITH IT.
>> Jimmy: IF YOU PLAY VERY, VERY
HARD AT ALL TIMES, IT COMES
EASIER AT THE TIMES WHEN YOU
REALLY ARE EXPECTED TO PLAY
HARD.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
ONCE YOU LEAVE IT OUT ON THE
LINE, I ALWAYS FEEL LIKE THIS
GAME HAS GIVEN ME SUCH AN
UNBELIEVABLE PLATFORM TO HELP
AND INSPIRE PEOPLE ACROSS THE
WORLD.
SO ANY OPPORTUNITY I HAVE, I DO
IT EVERY TIME.
[ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: DO YOU THINK PLAYERS
AND ‐‐ OBVIOUSLY I KNOW YOUR
APPROACH, BUT IT SEEMS ALMOST
NECESSARY FOR A GUY LIKE LeBRON
JAMES TO NOT PLAY AS HARD IN THE
REGULAR SEASON, AND TO PLAY AS
HARD AS HE CAN IN THE PLAYOFFS,
JUST SO THAT HIS BODY IS HEALTHY
ENOUGH TO PLAY.
>> YOU KNOW, SOME GUYS GOT
DIFFERENT APPROACHES, AND I
THINK I WAS ABLE TO LEARN THAT,
BEING AROUND THEM.
BUT I DO KNOW JUST FOR ME
PERSNALLY, I KNOW THAT THE GAME
IS NOT PROMISED TO ME.
I KNOW TOMORROW IS NOT PROMISED
TO ME AT ALL.
SO EVERY TIME I STEP ON THE
FLOOR, I GIVE EVERYTHING I HAVE.
YOU KNOW, I WAKE UP THE DAY AND
DO THE SAME THING AGAIN.
>> Jimmy: DO YOU GUARANTEE THE
LAKERS ARE GOING TO WIN AN NBA
TITLE THIS SEASON?
>> WELL, GUARANTEE?
I LIKE OUR CHANCES.
>> Jimmy: I HIKE YOUR CHANCES,
TOO.
WHY NUMBER ZERO?
>> ZERO, LIKE WHEN I FIRST GOT
TO UCLA, I WAS THINKING AS ZERO
LIKE A NEW BEGINNING, A NEW
CHAPTER MY LIFE AND I ALWAYS
START FROM GROUND ZERO.
THAT'S THE REASON I CHOSE ZERO
AGAIN.
>> Jimmy: I LIKE IT.
YOUR DOCUMENTARY IS CALLED
"PASSION PLAY: RUSSELL
WESTBROOK" AND IT PREMIERES
OCTOBER 15th ON SHOWTIME AND THE
LAKERS OPEN THE 2021 NBA SEASON
VERSUS THE GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS
OCTOBER 19th ON TNT.
RUSSELL WESTBROOK, EVERYBODY.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MUSIC
FROM ALICE MERTON.
>> Dicky: "THE JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE
CONCERT SERIES" IS PRESENTED BY
MERCEDES‐BENZ.
THE BEST OR NOTHING.
>> Jimmy: NOW FOR A LITTLE
MUSIC.
IT'S ABOUT TO HAPPEN HERE WITH
HER SONG "VERTIGO."
ALICE MERTON!
♪
♪ HANDS ARE SWEATY
MY HEART BEATS HEAVY ♪
♪ THERE'S SOMETHING
OUT THERE I SWEAR
I'M NOT READY ♪
♪ AND I DON'T REALLY KNOW
WHERE TO GO FROM HERE ♪
♪ THE SOUND'S GETTING LOUDER
THE FLOOR STARTS SHAKING ♪
♪ EVERYBODY'S FEELING IT
WHY CAN'T I FEEL IT, NO
WHY CAN'T I JUST LET IT GO ♪
♪ 'CAUSE ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO OH‐OH‐OH ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO ♪
♪ GOTTA GET
OUTTA MY HEAD ♪
♪ DO SOMETHING
THAT I'LL REGRET ♪
♪ HE'S DANCING NOW
WITH SOMEONE HE MET ♪
♪ LOSING MY SANITY
GET RID OF MY VANITY ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL IS
FEEL IS ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO ♪
♪ THEIR FACES SEEM DEADLY
IT JUST GOT MESSY ♪
♪ HIS EYES BLOODSHOT
BUT HE'S GOING IN STEADY ♪
♪ AND I DON'T REALLY KNOW
WHY I'M STILL HERE ♪
♪ AND MY HEAD KEEPS POUNDING
MY FEET ARE STILL HURTING ♪
♪ I THINK I LOST SIGHT
OF WHERE I WAS GOING ♪
♪ AND I DON'T REALLY KNOW
WHERE TO GO FROM HERE ♪
♪ 'CAUSE ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO OH‐OH‐OH ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO ♪
♪ GOTTA GET
OUTTA MY HEAD ♪
♪ DO SOMETHING
THAT I'LL REGRET ♪
♪ HE'S DANCING NOW
WITH SOMEONE HE MET ♪
♪ LOSING MY SANITY
GET RID OF MY VANITY ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL IS
FEEL IS ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO ♪
♪ GOTTA GET
OUTTA MY HEAD ♪
♪ DO SOMETHING
THAT I'LL REGRET ♪
♪ HE'S DANCING NOW
WITH SOMEONE HE MET ♪
♪ LOSING MY SANITY
GET RID OF MY VANITY ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL IS
FEEL IS ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO ♪
♪ CAUGHT INSIDE
OF A DARK NIGHT OUT ♪
♪ LEFT ME STANDING
BY MYSELF
UNDER YOUR CONTROL ♪
♪ 'CAUSE ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL IS
FEEL IS ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO ♪
♪ GOTTA GET
OUTTA MY HEAD ♪
♪ DO SOMETHING
THAT I'LL REGRET ♪
♪ HE'S DANCING NOW
WITH SOMEONE HE MET ♪
♪ LOSING MY SANITY
GET RID OF MY VANITY ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL IS
FEEL IS ♪
♪ ALL I CAN FEEL
IS VERTIGO ♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Dicky: "THE JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE
CONCERT SERIES" IS PRESENTED BY
MERCEDES‐BENZ.
THE BEST OR NOTHING.
>> Jimmy: I WANT TO THANK
JOHN STAMOS, RUSSELL WESTBROOK,
AND ALICE MERTON.
APOLOGIES TO MATT DAMON.
WE RAN OUT OF TIME FOR HIM.
TOMORROW NIGHT ‐‐
RAMI MALEK AND MELISSA BENOIST
WITH MUSIC FROM OLD DOMINION.
"NIGHTLINE" IS NEXT.
THANKS FOR WATCHING.
DON'T FORGET TO PUT THAT
CIGARETTE OUT BEFORE YOU FALL
ASLEEP!
GOODNIGHT.