[instrumental music]
"World War II was a conflict between
"two coalitions of states.
Who was in the Axis powers?"
Germany, Japan, uh..
Rhymes with bitaly.
- Italy. - Yes!
You are a genius!
[sighs] You know, Henry, if, um
two people are dating, and one of them
does something great, like knows that Italy
rhymes with bitaly.. It's okay to kiss them.
[sighs] But I want you to realize that I understand no means no.
- Is anyone here saying no? - No.
Uh, that one doesn't count.
[indistinct chatter]
Okay, how about we try it again?
Alright, okay, you ask me a question
and if I get it right, then someone
will congratulate the other one somewhere.
Okay.
"In 1942, what was three plus three?"
- Oh, it was so six! - Yes!
[knock on door]
[screams]
- Hey. You're home. - 'Hey.'
- Yeah. You too. - Yeah.
- Everything okay? - Yeah. We were just studying.
A-and respecting each other.
- I'll call you. - Okay.
- Thank you for...everything. - You're welcome.
[both chuckles]
See ya.
[clears throat]
What?
I have to go to a meeting, but maybe you and I
should have dinner tonight.
No, I'm supposed to meet Henry.
No, I think we need to talk.
About what?
You, Henry
having your door removed.
♪ I just wanna say life wouldn't be the same here ♪
♪ Without you ♪
♪ Through the good and bad of all that we've been through ♪
♪ I love you ♪
♪ Hold on to me and I'll return it ♪
♪ With nothing less than all of me ♪
♪ I'll never feel alone again ♪
♪ As you walk beside me ♪♪
[knock on door]
- Hey! - Hey.
You are never gonna guess what's playing tonight
at the Rialto.
What?
"Snake In The Eagle's Shadow."
Jackie Chan.
- Aah! - Aah!
[grunting]
[screaming]
So you're coming with me, right?
No, I can't, I promised Henry I'd see it
with him this weekend.
- What? - Well, you can come with us.
Well, I don't wanna come with you.
Uh, I want it to be just you and me.
Come on, Holly, ever since I started going out with Jill
and you started going out with Henry
we never see each other anymore.
- Well, that's not true. - It is true.
It's like we're not even friends these days.
I'm sorry. You're right.
I mean, I wanna hang out with you.
I just can't do it tonight, I'm having dinner with Val.
I think she wants to have a sex talk.
Ooh, about what?
Sex!
Well, w-why don't you guys come down to the restaurant?
I-I'll get off at 8:00, we can do the movie thing after.
I can't bring Val to the restaurant with Jeff there.
Don't worry about it. He's off tonight.
Actually, afterwards I'm supposed to meet Henry.
Well, can't you call him and tell him
you can't make it tonight?
He'll understand.
Come on, I'm not going out with Jill.
Okay, yeah. Definitely.
- I'll call him. - Great. See you tonight.
Okay.
Hey, could you do me a favor?
While I'm having dinner with Val, can, uh
you crank the music way up?
Why?
Maybe it'll block out the sound of Val saying
the word pubis.
[instrumental music]
So..
So?
I like the way they melt the fudge.
Yeah, me too.
I like fudge. Fudge is good.
So you and Henry..
Henry likes fudge.
Okay, then I guess this whole ugly sex talk is over.
Holly, sex is not ugly.
In fact, it's beautiful when you're really
truly, completely 40.
How old were you your first time?
Eight...years older than you are right now.
- So you were 24? - Uh-huh.
[clears throat]
Yeah, and I was in a really serious committed relationship.
I was very mature
very, uh, responsible
and, uh, very prepared.
Do you know what I mean when I say prepared?
Waxed?
Yes, I know what prepared means
condoms, the pill, diaphragm..
Oh, okay..
Um, look, Holly, ahem.
The way things are going with you and Henry
eventually you're gonna start having certain feelings
you know...certain desires..
Certain urges. Strong ones.
Stronger than my urge to leave?
You really have to be emotionally ready.
People make love to express their deepest
most intimate feelings. Sex is not a game.
It is a magical, mystical..
...special connection.
Got it.
Can I go now?
[stammering] Almost, uh, um, look..
[sighs] The reason I wanted to talk to you
is this afternoon when I came home, and you and Henry
were alone in your bedroom--
Yeah?
That made me a little uncomfortable.
Why? We weren't doing anything.
No, I know. I believe you. I do.
Yeah, I would just be more comfortable
if from now on I'm there when you have Henry over, okay?
- Why? Don't you trust me? - No, I do. I trust you.
So is it Henry? He's so respectful!
I practically have to give him permission to kiss me.
I would just rather I be there from now on, okay?
Oh, my God! Fine.
- Holly. - Where you going?
I have to go. I'll meet you at the movie.
- Hey, everything okay? - Yeah, it's fine.
Can I just get the check, please, Gary?
Okay.
Um, you know what? I'll take care of the check.
You go ahead and go out the back way.
Yeah, yeah, go out the back way, back way.
What? Why?
- Oh. - I-I'm sorry.
He wasn't supposed to be here tonight, I-I swear.
Oh, here he comes. Uh, you want me to tell him we're dating?
Uh, no. Just do me a favor.
Get rid of this so he doesn't know I ate
a whole damn fudge cake.
- Hi! - Hi.
Oh, well, it's great to see you.
- Uh, what are you doin' here? - Oh.
I, uh, just had dinner with Holly.
I finally found time. I've been so busy.
Busy, busy, busy.
So how've you been?
Busy. Busy, busy, busy.
Speakin' of busy.
Oh, yeah. It's just our second date.
Ah.
She seems nice.
She has a nice belly.
Nice and flat. Like a pancake.
Which I'm sure she never eats.
[both chuckles]
Actually, she could pretty much eat anything
she wants and never even..
She's dumb.
So you look great.
- Thanks. - No, really.
You look great.
You look...also great.
I like your hair. It's cute.
It's all up, it used to be all flat.
[chuckles] Like your girlfriend's belly.
You should probably get back to your date.
- What? - Dummy.
Oh, right.
Well, it was really nice to see you again.
Yeah, you too. Ahem, hm.
- You okay? - Yeah. You know.
Well, hey, if it makes you feel any better
I was over there checking out Jeff's date at the bar.
Now, either she's been drinking chocolate milk
or somebody's got a little moustache.
[instrumental music]
Unbelievable! I can't believe her!
I mean, like, what?
I'm in the apartment alone with my boyfriend.
I can't control myself?
Oh, look, Henry, no one's home. Take me.
And I mean, Henry, of all people?
He is so nice and so respectful
and so adorable, you know?
[sighs]
Yeah, uh, look, Holly
I feel like I owe you an apology.
For what?
Well, I kind of feel like I guilted you into coming tonight.
No, you didn't. I wanted to come.
We should definitely make time for each other.
Uh, yeah, but I-I want you to know that, um
if your phone rang right now
and if it was Henry saying that he, he would love
to see you, I'd completely understand
just like you would understand--
There you are.
Oh, my God, look at that. There's Jill.
Hey, babe. Can you believe that?
Jill's here. Good old Jill.
Hey.
I'm gonna go get something to drink.
Oh, no, no. I-I'll get it.
How about you, Holly?
You want anything? My treat.
You can have anything you want.
I've got $100.
No, no. Let me go. I'll be right back.
Okay, don't take too long now with your cute self.
[laughing] I'm a weak man.
Unbelievable.
[instrumental music]
Oh! What are you doing home?
Is the movie over already? What are you doing home?
Jill showed up, and I didn't really feel like
sticking around, so I left early.
Oh, well, I'm just gonna go finish my shower.
That was just taking a little break.
[chuckles]
[faucet squeaking]
The shower just shut off.
Well, I-I guess it's taking a little break too.
Hey, sweetie, do you.. Oh!
[instrumental music]
So what's, uh, what's going on?
Are you guys getting back together?
Who? Oh. Uh, no.
[clears throat]
Huh, so you had a special connection
but you're not in a meaningful relationship?
I'm baffled.
[sighs] Okay.
Okay, then. Ahem.
I just got off the phone with the plumber.
He said my shower should be fixed tomorrow by noon
so, Val, thanks again for letting me use your shower
that being the reason I was here.
Good day.
Okay, ahem, I should explain this to you.
Yes, please explain. I'd love to hear it.
[chuckles] What happened here is complicated.
- Uh-huh. - And..
Well, ahem..
Alright.
You remember when you were four
and you had that little blanky?
Oh, this is gonna be good.
You and blanky spent a lot of time together.
But then it came time for the two of you
to go your separate ways.
You remember how upset that made you?
Remember how you were so upset that one night
that we let you and blanky sleep together
one last time to say goodbye?
Yeah.
But why did you have sex with Jeff?
I-I don't know! I don't know.
Okay, looking back, it was probably a mistake.
Probably? You said that sex isn't a game.
You said it was a magical mystery tour or something
and then you do this!
This is different, okay? You just wouldn't understand.
I wouldn't understand? No, I understand.
Your have one set of rules for me
and another one for yourself.
- No, Holly, I don't. - Yes!
I mean, I'm not allowed to have my boyfriend over here
unless you're home, I mean, you're the one
who needs the babysitter.
Okay, I don't have to listen to this.
I had to listen to you, and it turns out
that you didn't mean a word you said.
No, I meant every word of it.
Oh, my God. You are such a hypocrite!
- No, I'm not! - Yes, you are!
No! I just, I said one thing, and I did another.
[chuckles] I was being silly!
[chuckles]
What?
I-I don't have to explain myself to you.
- Oh, my God! This is such crap! - Holly.
The next time that you wanna justify your little urges
you leave blanky out of it!
[instrumental music]
[knock on door]
- Hey. - Hey.
- Thanks for coming over. - Yeah. Are you okay?
- What's wrong? - Ah...everything.
- Last night, you and me.. - I thought you enjoyed that.
I did. A lot.
It was like the best ever.
Well, I did bring my A game.
[clears throat]
Yeah, you did.
But then Holly came home and..
Ugh, I am such a horrible role model.
- Oh, you are not. - You have no idea.
Yesterday I lectured Holly about how you should
never have sex unless you're in a meaningful relationship
and then I went and.. Well, you know the rest.
You didn't do anything you should be ashamed of.
Well, hm, except for that one thing.
What? Oh, that?
Look, it's not like I'm some guy
you just pulled off the street.
I know.
Uh, but last night as great as it was
it can never happen again.
I mean, I-I can't
keep giving Holly mixed messages.
I can't keep giving myself mixed messages.
Your feelings about marriage haven't changed, have they?
[sighs] No.
Neither have mine.
So I guess the best thing for us to do would be
for us to just not see each other anymore
until we can do it without...doing it.
Look, if you ever need anything you, Holly..
I know, I know.
- Okay. - Okay.
- Bye. - Bye.
Since we didn't know it was the last time
do you think maybe we could do it once more
so our bodies could officially say goodbye?
[instrumental music]
So then I slammed the door all dramatic
and I haven't talked to her since.
Here you gonna eat the last fry?
Uh...no, you take it.
Oh, no, you.
No, you.
Okay, well, it's just gonna sit there as a symbol
of our consideration for each other.
Look, I know you're mad at your sister
but Jeff and Val loved each other for a long time
and feelings like that don't just disappear overnight.
[chuckles] Seriously, I mean, I know that if we broke up
how hard it would be for me to get over my feelings for you.
That's twice tonight you're being all wise and stuff.
By stuff, do you mean crazy, sexy, cool?
Yeah. I like it when you're all confident and sure of yourself.
- It makes-- - Stop right there.
- Come with me. - Where are we going?
Don't ask questions. I'm taking charge.
[giggling] Okay!
Um.
I wanted to be alone with you.
I know this isn't the most romantic place but..
But it is the place we met.
How am I doing? You liking this whole take-charge thing?
[chuckles] I'm lovin' it.
When I first met you, when I came out of that stall
and saw you standing here so angry at your sister, I..
God, you're angry at your sister a lot.
- Can we leave her out of it? - I'm sorry. I..
It's just when I talk about it, it makes me sound wise
and I know you like it when I'm wise.
I like a lot about you, Henry.
And I like a lot about you.
In fact, I like you so much that it's been hard for me
to express myself, because I-I don't wanna say
or do the wrong thing.
I really wanted to kiss you, you know
where you don't kiss me first and I kind of surprise you.
A really strong, masculine, sexy
take-charge kinda kiss where I just look
into your eyes and then--
Come on, I wanted to do it!
I'm sorry, it's just you were being so explainy
[chuckles] and I was standing here for--
I liked that.
Me too. Come on.
Next time when we kiss, can we do it
in a place that smells less like pee?
[instrumental music]
- Hey. - Hey.
- Where have you been? - Dinner with Henry.
We had a magical, mystical urge to eat.
Come here. I wanna talk to you.
I'm so sorry.
I was trying so hard to do the right thing
that I ended up doing the complete wrong things.
No. You didn't do anything wrong.
I mean, I understand what happened.
You and Jeff, I mean, you can't expect
to get over your feelings that fast.
But I want you to know what happened last night
it's, it's never gonna happen again.
Well, don't not do it for my sake.
I mean, it's really none of my business.
Well, you were right. It was hypocritical.
And I do trust you and Henry..
...even when I'm not home.
Thank you.
[sighs] I want you to know that I am never gonna do anything
with any guy until I'm ready.
- And, Val.. - Hm.
I think I'm ready.
[laughing] I'm kidding.
Yeah, that's funny.
Seriously, when I am really ready
I'm going to be dying to tell you.
- Swear? - Swear.
Okay, good.
- Do you love me again? - Yes!
- Now can I ask you a question? - Hm.
Were you really 24 your first time?
- No. - I knew it!
I've never done it.
[instrumental music]
[theme music]