PREVIOUSLY ON THE L WORD...
IS JAMIE THAT GIRL YOU'VE BEEN HANGING OUT WITH ALL THE TIME?
SHE IS AWESOME.
DO YOU THINK THERE'S SOMETHING GOING ON
BETWEEN TASHA AND JAMIE?
OH, SORRY.
DO YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR TASHA?
ALICE, I WOULD NEVER DO ANYTHING.
SEXUAL HARASSMENT?
TELL ME YOU NEVER WANT TO SEE ME AGAIN.
I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
I'M HAVING DINNER WITH DYLAN.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE IDEA.
WHAT IF WE THOUGHT OF A TEST
THAT WOULD PROVE ONCE AND FOR ALL
WHETHER DYLAN WAS A SLEAZY, GOLD-DIGGING OPPORTUNIST...
SHE'S GOING IN.
IF YOU WANT TO DIRECT THIS FILM,
THEN YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO COME HOME WITH ME.
THEN I GUESS I'M NOT GOING TO BE DIRECTING THIS MOVIE.
NIKKI STEVENS WAS A TEST?
NO, THAT--DYLAN, THAT'S NOT EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.
I DON'T ACTUALLY THINK THAT YOU WERE THE ONE
WHO STOLE THE NEGATIVE, TINA,
BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT A COMPLETE AND TOTAL
RAVING LUNATIC.
I DID NOT STEAL THE NEGATIVE.
WHO'S THAT?
I DON'T KNOW.
SHE'S CUTE.
THIS IS HERS.
IF YOU WOULDN'T MIND GIVING IT TO HER, THERE'S A...
A LETTER IN THE INSIDE POCKET
IN CASE I DON'T GET TO SEE HER.
YOU'RE PREGNANT.
NO, I CAN'T BE PREGNANT.
I THOUGHT IF I WAS TAKING TESTOSTERONE,
I COULDN'T GET PREGNANT, OKAY?
CAN I COME IN?
I'M JUST CASHING IN ON A LITTLE RAIN CHECK?
THAT COUPON...
IT EXPIRED, LIKE, 15 YEARS AGO.
OH, NO, I DON'T THINK SO--
YEAH, IT DID.
STOP IT.
ARE YOU REALLY SURE YOU WANT TO HAVE THIS GIRL MOVE IN WITH YOU?
THIS GIRL IS OUR BIRTH MOTHER, OKAY?
HER NAME'S MARCI,
AND WE'RE PICKING HER UP TOMORROW.
MAYBE SHE FELL ASLEEP ON THE BUS.
THE MEETING I HAD YESTERDAY,
IT ACTUALLY WENT BETTER THAN I EXPECTED.
BETTE, HE OFFERED ME A JOB.
THE JOB'S IN NEW YORK.
THEY WANT YOU TO MOVE TO NEW YORK?
[HUM OF BUSY POLICE STATION]
LISTEN, I CAN'T TELL YOU I DIDN'T THINK ABOUT IT.
I WAS KIDDING.
IT'S NOT LIKE I WOULD EVER DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
I LIKE MY FREEDOM, I DO.
I...
ASK ANY ONE OF MY FRIENDS OUT THERE,
AND THEY'RE GOING TO TELL YOU THE SAME THING.
YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY STARTS TO PISS ME OFF AFTER A WHILE?
IS WHEN COUPLES ALWAYS SAY THE WORD "WE."
I HATE IT.
"WE THINK," "WE MAY," "WE MIGHT,"
BUT "WE FEEL," THAT'S THE BIG ONE.
FEELING IS A SOLITARY EMOTION.
SO, YOU MAY FEEL LIKE YOU'RE FALLING IN LOVE,
AND I MAY, MIGHT FEEL LIKE I'M BEING CAGED.
THE OTHER DAY,
THEY WERE PUTTING THAT "FOR SALE" SIGN UP
FOR BETTE AND TINA'S HOUSE...
AND JENNY COMES TROTTING OVER WITH HER VIDEO CAMERA,
BECAUSE SHE'S MAKING THIS TRIBUTE VIDEO FOR THEM.
HEY, SHANE.
SHE ASKED ME TO SAY SOMETHING.
YOU READY?
YEAH.
HI, BETTE AND TINA...
I COULDN'T GET A FUCKING WORD OUT,
BECAUSE EVERYTHING SHE WAS SAYING WAS "WE."
...AND WE ARE WISHING YOU WELL
ON YOUR TRIP TO NEW YORK, WHICH I REALIZE
IS KIND OF AN ADVENTURE FOR YOU GUYS, RIGHT?
AND I WAS THINKING
THAT IT'S ACTUALLY AN ADVENTURE FOR US, TOO.
OKAY, JUST FOLLOW ME HERE.
IT'S AN ADVENTURE
BECAUSE WITH YOU GUYS LEAVING,
YOU GUYS WERE THIS SUPREME, WONDERFUL,
BEAUTIFIC COUPLE,
AND NOW WE ARE TAKING...
WE'RE GOING TO TAKE YOUR PLACE,
BECAUSE WE'RE THE ONLY ONES LEFT.
SO, THIS IS REALLY, REALLY EXCITING.
SO, I GIVE YOU MY WORD
THAT WE'RE GOING TO MAKE IT.
I LOVE TASHA.
I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH.
AND I DON'T THINK YOU REALIZE EITHER.
AND I LOVE YOU, TOO.
I GUESS I'M JUST...
ASKING YOU GUYS
TO BE HONEST ABOUT WHAT'S GOING ON.
ALICE, I SWEAR TO YOU,
NOTHING HAS HAPPENED BETWEEN US.
I KNOW NOTHING'S HAPPENED BETWEEN YOU...
PHYSICALLY.
I'M SURE YOU GUYS HAVEN'T EVEN ADMITTED IT TO YOURSELVES.
BECAUSE I KNOW YOU THINK
THINKING IS CHEATING, SO...
I'M SURE YOU THINK THE SAME THING.
JUST BE FUCKING TRUTHFUL
ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS.
IT'S OBVIOUSLY OUT OF YOUR CONTROL.
I'M NOT GOING TO ACCEPT THAT.
WELL, YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT IT.
YOU CAN'T...
ALL THE MILITARY TRAINING IN THE WORLD DOESN'T, YOU KNOW,
HELP YOU CONTROL FEELINGS.
YOU CAN'T...
I'M GIVING YOU A CHANCE HERE TO JUST BE HONEST WITH ME.
JUST TELL ME.
OKAY, YEAH.
IT'S TRUE.
AND I'M ONLY SPEAKING FOR MYSELF, BUT...
YEAH, I THINK I HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH TASHA.
SO THERE IT IS.
THANK YOU...
AND FUCK YOU.
GOD, I AM SO SORRY, ALICE.
FUCK YOU.
YOU'VE GOT TO BELIEVE ME,
THIS IS THE LAST THING I EVER WANTED TO HAPPEN.
FIRST AND FOREMOST,
I HAVE SO MUCH RESPECT FOR BOTH OF YOU,
AND FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP,
AND I CHERISH THIS FRIENDSHIP.
PLUS, I DON'T EVEN THINK TASHA--
OH, SHE DOES.
GO, YOU'RE FREE.
NO, NO, NO. GOD, NO.
PLEASE DO NOT BREAK UP BECAUSE OF ME--
WE'RE NOT.
DON'T DO THIS.
WHEN WE HAVE SEX, I DON'T CLOSE MY EYES
AND IMAGINE SOMEONE ELSE NAKED IN THE SHOWER.
FUCK YOU.
YOU GUYS, PLEASE, DON'T.
YOU LOVE EACH OTHER, JUST GET ME OUT OF THE EQUATION,
AND EVERYTHING WILL GO BACK TO THE WAY IT IS.
WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP, PLEASE?
JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP.
YOU... WOW, YOU GUYS SHOULD JUST...
YOU SHOULD GIVE IT A TRY.
THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
TRY WHAT? WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?
JUST FUCKING TRY IT!
JUST...
[SIGHS]
IF YOU DON'T CALL ME BY THE SAME TIME TOMORROW,
I'LL KNOW YOU MADE UP YOUR MIND ABOUT WHAT IT IS YOU WANT.
THIS IS NOT...
THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE.
ALICE, YOU KNOW THAT I LIVE A LIFE
OF HONOR AND DUTY.
WELL, I DON'T WANT YOU TO STAY WITH ME
OUT OF A SENSE OF DUTY.
DON'T STAY WITH ME BECAUSE IT'S THE RIGHT THING TO DO.
NO, ALICE--
SAVE IT.
SHUT UP.
[SIGHS]
THE ONLY PERSON THAT I EVER REALLY LOVED
AS MUCH AS TASHA
WAS DANA.
DANA FAIRBANKS.
AND DANA BROKE YOUR HEART AS WELL?
SHE BROKE MY HEART, AND THEN SHE GOT SICK.
JENNY'S HERE, SO...
MAYBE WE SHOULD CONTINUE THIS CONVERSATION LATER.
WE DON'T HAVE TO CONTINUE IT AT ALL.
DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.
I WAS JUST UPSET, OKAY?
I DIDN'T EXPECT TO BE KICKED OUT OF MY SUBLET.
AND I JUST FELT THAT YOU WERE EXPECTING ME
TO INVITE YOU TO MOVE IN HERE WITH ME.
I WASN'T ANGLING FOR AN INVITATION
TO MOVE IN WITH YOU.
NOTHING COULD HAVE BEEN FURTHER FROM MY MIND.
WELL, IN THAT CASE, I'M SORRY.
BUT YOU KNOW SOMETHING?
I WOULD HAVE SAID NO IF YOU HAD OFFERED,
BUT IT WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE.
[SIGHS]
SO, WHAT ARE YOU SHOOTING?
WHAT ARE YOU...
I'M SHOOTING A TRIBUTE VIDEO
TO BETTE AND TINA.
YOU KNOW, I'M GOING TO DO IT
FOR THEIR GOODBYE PARTY,
WHICH IS VERY EXCITING.
DO I HAVE TO BE ON CAMERA?
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, I REALLY HATE THAT.
WELL, I THINK IT'S A GOOD IDEA.
I MEAN, I WOULD LIKE TO GET EVERYONE ON CAMERA.
IT WOULD BE GREAT IF...
YOU WOULD DO SOMETHING AS WELL.
SURE.
GREAT.
DO YOU WANT A DRINK, JENNY?
UM, NO, I DON'T THINK SO.
I THINK IT'S A LITTLE EARLY FOR ME, BUT THANK YOU.
IT'S NEVER TOO EARLY FOR A DRINK.
I'LL HAVE ONE.
SO... TONS OF PEOPLE
HAVE SENT ME TAPES...
GREAT.
WHO DON'T EVEN LIVE IN L.A.,
FOR THE TRIBUTE VIDEO.
OKAY, WE SHOULD JUST START, RIGHT?
ALL RIGHT, WELL, IF YOU GUYS COULD JUST STAND CLOSE TOGETHER,
SO I CAN GET THE POOL IN THE SHOT.
OKAY,
AND PERHAPS YOU CAN MAKE A TOAST TO TINA AND BETTE?
TO TINA AND BETTE.
OH, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.
ADMIT IT, THEY WERE ASSHOLES.
[CHUCKLES]
YEAH, THEY WERE PRETTY HARD TO PENETRATE.
YOU KNOW, AFTER...
AFTER A WHILE, I REALIZED
IT'S NOT THAT THEY WERE TOTAL SNOBS,
IT'S JUST THAT THEY WERE INSULAR.
TIGHT, KIND OF, YOU KNOW?
AS WE'VE GOTTEN TO KNOW EACH OTHER,
I REALIZE THEY'RE PRETTY AMAZING PEOPLE.
REALLY SPECIAL.
I CALL THEM "FRAMILY,"
MORE THAN FRIENDS, LESS THAN FAMILY.
I WOULDN'T REALLY GO UP THERE IF I WERE YOU.
WHY?
BECAUSE THAT RAILING ISN'T SECURED.
WEEZIE SAID SHE'D COME OVER TONIGHT AND FIX IT.
OH, WELL, OOH,
DON'T LET ANGIE GO NEAR THAT.
THAT'S DANGEROUS.
OH, DON'T WORRY, I WON'T.
SO...
WHAT ARE YOU TWO GOING TO DO?
[SIGHS]
WELL, WE'VE REGISTERED WITH TWO ADOPTION AGENCIES
THAT ARE EXPERIENCED IN SAME-SEX ADOPTIONS,
AND, UM...
THEN WE JUST WAIT FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO CHOOSE US.
WHAT ABOUT...
MAX?
[WHISPERING]: NO!
WHY NOT?
NO.
COME ON!
SHH!
IT'S PERFECT.
HE HAS SOMETHING THAT YOU GUYS WANT.
WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT FUCKING USED CARS, KIT.
I MEAN, YOU KNOW, AND ANYWAY,
I THINK HE'S...
COME TO TERMS WITH HIS SITUATION.
I THINK HE'S READY TO BE A FATHER.
OKAY.
WELL, LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING ELSE.
WHAT?
UM, WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH YOU GUYS
JUST SUDDENLY UP AND WANTING TO MOVE TO NEW YORK?
YOU KNOW WHAT THE DEAL IS,
TINA HAS A NEW JOB.
I KNOW,
BUT YOU JUST OPENED UP A NEW GALLERY
THAT YOU PUT YOUR HEART AND SOUL IN,
YOU HAVE A NEW BUSINESS PARTNER,
AND A BEAUTIFUL, NEWLY REMODELED HOME.
[SIGHS]
CAN I TELL YOU SOMETHING IN CONFIDENCE?
OF COURSE.
I AM SO READY TO GET OUT OF HERE.
I AM SO TIRED
OF EVERYONE BEING ALL UP IN EVERYONE ELSE'S BUSINESS.
WHAT BUSINESS EXACTLY
DO YOU WANT SOMEONE TO GET OUT OF?
I WANT JENNY SCHECTER TO MIND HER OWN FUCKING BUSINESS.
OKAY, HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED.
UH, KELLY WENTWORTH MADE A PASS AT ME.
YOU REMEMBER THE OTHER NIGHT AFTER THE OPENING,
SHE CAME OVER HERE,
UNINVITED, MIGHT I ADD,
TO CELEBRATE, AND...
JENNY SAW US THROUGH THE WINDOW.
WELL, WHAT DID SHE SEE? WHAT WERE YOU DOING?
NOTHING!
SHE DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING.
KIT, SHE DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING,
BUT I SWEAR, SHE'S GOT SOME KIND OF FUCKING CRAZY IDEA
THAT I'M HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH KELLY,
AND I SWEAR,
I'M NOT HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH KELLY.
NO, BUT SEE, NOW THE PROBLEM IS,
I DIDN'T TELL TINA THAT NIGHT THAT KELLY HAD COME OVER,
AND IF I TELL HER NOW, IT JUST BECOMES THIS WHOLE...
MESS, SO...
I HAVEN'T TOLD HER.
YEAH, IT'S GOING TO BE A MESS
THAT YOU DIDN'T TELL TINA THAT KELLY MADE A PASS AT YOU.
AND NOW JENNY'S ON THIS FUCKING DELUSIONAL POWER TRIP,
AND SHE WANTS ME TO CONFESS TO TINA.
I-IS THAT WHY YOU WANT TO GO TO NEW YORK?
I WANT TO GO TO NEW YORK
BECAUSE I THINK IT WOULD BE A GOOD MOVE FOR US.
HOWEVER, I AM HAPPY TO BE GETTING OUT
OF THIS LITTLE INCESTUOUS HOTBED
OF LESBIAN INTER-FUCKING-CONNECTEDNESS.
YOU WILL NEVER A FIND A GROUP OF PEOPLE
WHO LOVE ONE ANOTHER MORE,
AND WHO LOOK AFTER ONE ANOTHER
AS LOVINGLY AS THESE FRIENDS DO.
YOU COULD GIVE ME ANY ARMY,
ASSEMBLY OF GOD,
AND I WOULD PUT MY POSSE UP AGAINST THEM
BECAUSE THEY ARE SO TIGHT
AND FIERCELY LOYAL.
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TOLD HER
TO GO HAVE SEX WITH THIS GIRL,
AND THEN TO LET YOU KNOW WHAT SHE DECIDES, ALICE.
THAT IS FUCKING CRAZY.
IT'S NO MORE CRAZY
THAN YOU NOT ENDING THE RELATIONSHIP FROM HELL
BECAUSE YOU THINK IT'LL KILL JENNY.
I THINK SHE'S CAPABLE OF IT.
AND THAT WOULD BE A BAD THING?
YOU KNOW YOU DON'T MEAN THAT.
MAYBE I DON'T.
NO, YOU DON'T.
WHAT?
I JUST...
I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHEN YOU BECAME SO HONOR-BOUND.
I MEAN, NO OFFENSE,
BUT IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'VE REALLY BEEN
THE MOST UPSTANDING CITIZEN
WHEN IT COMES TO SEXUAL FIDELITY.
I KNOW.
ALL RIGHT, LET ME TRY TO EXPLAIN THIS.
GREAT.
PLEASE, EXPLAIN TO ME.
I'M BEING SERIOUS.
I AM, TOO.
I'M READY.
I-I JUST...
I FEEL RESPONSIBLE FOR HER.
OKAY.
IT'S LIKE I'VE BEEN ENTRUSTED
WITH THIS LOST CHILD, IN A WAY.
HMM.
AND THAT I WAS GIVEN THIS OPPORTUNITY TO BE...
RESPONSIBLE FOR SOMEBODY ELSE'S FEELINGS.
[CLUCKS SKEPTICALLY]
WHAT?
WELL, IT'S SICK, NUMBER ONE.
YOU DON'T GET IT.
YOU DON'T LISTEN.
YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ME.
OUT OF ALL THE PEOPLE THAT YOU'VE BEEN WITH,
WHY ARE YOU PICKING JENNY FOR THIS?
LIKE, THE GIRL'S NOT EVEN TALENTED.
SHE'S NOT EVEN A NICE PERSON.
SHE'S LIKE A FRAUD.
YOU KNOW SHE STOLE MY IDEA, YOU KNOW IT.
I DON'T KNOW THAT.
YOU KNOW IT BECAUSE I TOLD YOU.
ALICE, IT IS YOUR WORD AGAINST HERS.
IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN.
OH, MY GOD, SHANE,
I CAN LITERALLY PROVE THIS TO YOU.
I HAVE IT ON MY COMPU--
I HAVE THE WHOLE DATE.
I HAVE THE TREATMENT ON MY COMPUTER.
ALICE, IT'S NOT ABOUT THE TREATMENT.
NO, I HAVE THE DATE--
IT'S NOT ABOUT--
IT'S THE SAME TREATMENT!
IT'S NOT ABOUT THE TREATMENT!
I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE TREATMENT!
IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT!
NONE OF THIS HAS TO DO WITH HER BEING AN ARTIST
OR A GOOD ARTIST.
IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.
WOMEN DRIVE ME CRAZY.
I FALL IN LOVE WITH WOMEN, BUT...
IF I WAS TO WALK AWAY FROM THIS,
I THINK SHE'D GO OFF THE DEEP END,
I REALLY DO.
SO IT IS A CHOICE
BETWEEN MY HAPPINESS AND HERS,
THAT'S HOW I SEE IT.
YEAH, I-I DON'T KNOW, OKAY?
YEAH.
LISTEN, I GOT TO GO.
OKAY. BYE.
[SIGHING]: OH, GOD,
I DON'T REALLY FEEL LIKE GOING TO THE MOVIES TONIGHT.
DO YOU?
WHO WERE YOU TALKING TO JUST NOW?
NOBODY.
JUST A FRIEND.
A FRIEND CALLED NOBODY? WHAT...
IS THIS GOING TO END ANYTIME SOON,
OR AM I GOING TO BE UNDER SUSPICION
FOR AS LONG AS WE'RE TOGETHER?
I KNOW IT'S A CLICHE, BUT...
BEING RICH?
IT'S A CURSE.
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE
NEVER KNOWING IF ANYONE EVER REALLY CARES FOR YOU,
OR IF THEY'RE JUST WITH YOU FOR THE MONEY.
DYLAN...
DYLAN, DON'T JUST...
PLEASE...
LISTEN.
LOOK...
I'M SORRY, OKAY?
OKAY?
I'LL TRY TO STOP.
THAT WOULD BE NICE.
TRUST...
I-IS HARD FOR ME.
IT ALWAYS...
IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN.
I NEVER REALLY KNEW HOW TO BE WITH PEOPLE BEFORE.
YOU KNOW, EVEN...
EVEN WHEN I WAS WITH WINNIE, I JUST USED TO...
BUY AND SELL PEOPLE,
EXPECT THEM TO SERVE ME.
TRUST ME.
[**]
DO YOU TRUST ME?
YEAH, I DO.
YEAH?
YEAH.
[**]
THE REASON WHY I WAS SUCH A...
BITCH
[GIGGLES]
WHEN WE FIRST MET
WAS BECAUSE MY MOTHER HAD ALWAYS SPOKEN ABOUT YOU
WITH SUCH GREAT ADMIRATION.
YOU KNOW, YOU WERE...
YOU WERE THE DAUGHTER I COULD NEVER BE,
THE WOMAN I WOULD ALWAYS HAVE TO MEASURE UP AGAINST.
OH, BETTE, I MISS YOU SO MUCH.
I'LL NEVER FORGET
THE FIRST TIME I SAW YOU AT C.U.
IT WAS A LECTURE,
AND YOU WERE ONE OF THE PANELISTS,
AND YOU LOOKED SO HOT IN YOUR POWER SUIT.
I'M GOING TO MISS DOUBLE-BILLING YOU LADIES.
MY BUSINESS IS REALLY GOING TO TAKE A HIT.
[GIGGLING]
OH, WE MISS YOU, BETTE AND TINA!
[GASPING AND MOANING]
[CRYING OUT IN ECSTASY]
OH, GOD...
[PANTING]
OH, MY GOD, WE SHOULD GET WEEZIE TO FIX THE RAILING
BEFORE ALL THESE PEOPLE COME OVER TO OUR HOUSE.
WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?
OOPS.
I SAID, "OH, MY GOD,
"THAT WAS THE MOST INTENSE ORGASM
"I HAVE EVER HAD,
AND I THINK YOU DESERVE MORE OF THE SAME."
JUST KISS ME.
I WAS KISSING YOU.
I KNOW, BUT KISS ME LIKE THIS.
YOU KNOW WHAT I'D LIKE TO DO WHEN WE GET TO NEW YORK?
WHAT?
I'D LIKE TO MARRY YOU.
[GASPS]
REALLY?
YEAH, REALLY.
[**]
WHAT ABOUT TINA?
SHE'S THE LOVE OF MY LIFE.
HEY!
HEY...
HEY.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT SO EARLY?
GOING HOME.
FROM...
HA, HA, HA.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS FINISHED.
IT LOOKS INCREDIBLE.
NICE DODGE.
UM, NOT QUITE.
YEAH, WEEZIE'S GOING TO COME BACK AND FIX IT
BEFORE THE PARTY.
WHAT HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN DOING?
[LAUGHS]
AH-HA.
SO, WHAT,
DID YOU SPEND THE NIGHT IN YOUR STUDIO?
NO, NO, JENNY'S USING IT. I WAS JUST WITH ALICE.
WITH ALICE?
YEAH, YEAH, SHE'S, UM...
WHAT CAN I SAY, SHE'S REALLY UPSET
ABOUT THAT WHOLE THING WITH TASH AND THAT GIRL, JAMIE.
OH, GOD,
THAT WAS A DISASTER WAITING TO HAPPEN.
WAIT, WAIT.
JUST WAIT A SECOND, WAIT.
SO JENNY'S USING THE STUDIO?
I THOUGHT THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR PHOTOGRAPHY STUDIO?
IT IS.
THAT JENNY GAVE TO YOU AS A GIFT
SO THAT YOU COULD HAVE SOME PLACE
THAT WAS YOURS, AND YOURS ALONE.
[CHUCKLES RUEFULLY]: UM...
WELL, SHE'S JUST-- I MEAN, SHE-SHE JUST NEEDED IT.
SHE'S-SHE'S MAKING... SHE'S WORKING ON SOMETHING.
IT'S IMPORTANT.
[LAUGHS IN DISBELIEF]
IT'S GOING TO BE GOOD.
THIS IS BULLSHIT, SHANE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK IT IS?
I THINK SHE NEEDED TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING
SO THAT SHE COULD HAVE SOMETHING ELSE
TO TAKE AWAY FROM YOU.
COME ON, BETTE, THAT'S HARSH.
LISTEN, I-I UNDERSTAND WHERE YOU'RE COMING FROM,
I REALLY DO, I JUST...
I-I'D LIKE TO THINK SHE'S NOT THAT CALCULATED.
YEAH, I HAVE TO AGREE WITH SHANE.
I MEAN, BASICALLY, I THINK
HER HEART'S IN THE RIGHT PLACE.
YEAH, I THINK HER HEART IS IN THE RIGHT PLACE,
I THINK SHE'S JUST MISPLACED HER MEDS.
I HAD THIS MOMENT
OF JEALOUSY WITH KELLY,
BUT IT WAS ONLY A MOMENT.
KELLY?
KELLY WENTWORTH.
SHE WAS BETTE'S BUSINESS PARTNER.
SHE'S, UM...
YOU KNOW, SHE'S LIKE A BOMBSHELL,
KIND OF A VACANT BOMBSHELL.
KIT CALLS HER A VIXEN.
YOU KNOW, LIKE A REAL PREDATOR TYPE.
* LOVERS
* DON'T BE AFRAID...
* I HAVE COME TO SAVE YOU...
SHE STILL HASN'T CALLED,
WHICH CAN ONLY MEAN ONE THING.
THEY'RE HAVING, LIKE, A SEX-CAPADE.
AL, YOU CAN'T KEEP DOING THIS TO YOURSELF.
IT'S CRAZY.
I'M SURE THEY HAVE GREAT SEX, YOU KNOW?
THEY HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON.
I'M SURE THEY'RE LIKE,
"DO YOU LIKE IT WHEN I TOUCH YOU LIKE THAT,
BECAUSE I LIKE IT WHEN YOU TOUCH ME LIKE THAT."
YOU KNOW, IT'S THE SAME.
OR, "OH, MY GOD,
"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR NIPPLES GET HARD WHEN I LICK THEM,
BECAUSE MINE GET HARD WHEN YOU LICK MINE!"
YOU KNOW, EVENTUALLY,
THEY SHOULD JUST STOP HAVING SEX
BECAUSE THEY'RE SO THE SAME, THEY COULD JUST MASTURBATE,
IT WOULD BE THE SAME THING.
ALICE, LISTEN TO ME.
I HAVE TO GO GET A PRESENT FOR BETTE AND TINA,
I CAN PICK YOU UP, WE CAN GO TO LUNCH,
AND WE CAN MAKE IT FUN.
OH, MY GOD, 140 CALORIES?
THAT'S CRAZY.
YOU GOT TO GET OUT OF THAT SKANKY HOUSE OF YOURS ANYWAY--
HEY.
HI, SOUNDER.
FUCK!
[MOANS]
WHAT?
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK I'M GOING TO DO!
OH, JESUS. AL, LET ME CALL YOU BACK.
[GROANS]
ALL RIGHT, CALL ME, THOUGH, OKAY?
WHAT'S WRONG? WHAT HAPPENED?
I HAVE TO FINISH THE TRIBUTE VIDEO BY TONIGHT.
I JUST GET THIS PHONE CALL
THAT THREE MORE PEOPLE ARE SENDING IN THEIR TAPES,
WHICH I NEED TO PICK UP BY FEDEX BY NOON
OR WHATEVER THE FUCK THE TIME IS,
AND I HAVE TO DIGITIZE IT, THEN I HAVE TO...
I HAVE TO GO TO THE GROVE,
I HAVE TO GET THE EDITING SOFTWARE,
AND THEN I HAVE TO GO TO SOOLIP--
ALL RIGHT, JEN, JEN, JEN, SHUSH, SHUSH.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.
LISTEN, LISTEN, LISTEN TO ME.
I'LL GO TO THE MAC STORE FOR YOU.
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT?
AND I'LL GO TO SOOLIP AS WELL.
YOU GO TO FEDEX,
AND I'LL MEET YOU AT THE STUDIO.
PROBLEM SOLVED.
SHE UNDERSTANDS ME, DOESN'T SHE?
OH, THAT WAS GREAT, WASN'T IT?
[LAUGHING]: YES...
HEY!
OH, WE HAD THE BEST TIME!
DID YOU?
WHAT DID YOU SEE AT THE ZOO?
FUNNY GIRAFFE.
YOU DID?
YEAH, WE SAW AN OLD GIRAFFE
WITH A GOITER ON HIS NECK.
REALLY?
YEAH, WE SAW BABY LIONS AND RHINOCEROSES.
THAT SOUNDS LIKE SO MUCH FUN.
LET'S GO WASH UP.
MAMA B MADE YOU DINNER.
DO YOU MIND IF I USE YOUR BATHROOM TO CHANGE?
I'M GOING TO BE LATE FOR WORK.
OH, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO THE PARTY?
NO, MY MAN HAS TO GO TO WORK.
HE'S GOT TO BE AT THE CLUB.
THERE'S A POWDER ROOM DOWN THE HALL,
JUST RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER.
OH, YOU KNOW WHAT? IT'S TINY.
YOU SHOULD GO UPSTAIRS
AND USE OUR FABULOUS NEW BATHROOM.
ALL RIGHT, UM, THANK YOU.
THE POWDER ROOM IS TOO TINY.
HE'S REALLY BIG.
HEY, HE WON'T MAKE A MESS.
HE'S THE NEATEST AND THE CLEANEST MAN I KNOW.
THAT'S FINE, HOWEVER...
HE'S STILL A MAN.
UH, AND YOU'RE SAYING...
WELL, I JUST...
YOU KNOW, WHAT IF HE FORGETS
TO PUT THE TOILET SEAT UP OR SOMETHING?
[LAUGHS]: YOU'RE KIDDING ME, RIGHT?
NO, I MEAN, I'M JUST NOT THAT CRAZY
ABOUT THE IDEA OF SOME MAN
IN MY BEAUTIFUL NEW BATHROOM.
DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT.
I'M NOT A MAN-HATER.
I DON'T HAVE TO! OH, MY GOD...
THERE'S JUST SOME FACETS OF MAN-NESS
THAT JUST MAKE ME QUEASY, THAT'S ALL.
HOW DO YOU PUT UP WITH HER?
TELL ME, SOMEBODY, PLEASE.
AH...
HE NEVER PEES IN MY BATHROOM, RIGHT?
NOPE, NEVER.
NEVER? WHERE DO YOU PEE?
POWDER ROOM.
RIGHT?
HI.
ALL RIGHT, SO THEY DIDN'T HAVE THE PESTO,
SO I GOT YOU FRIED CHICKEN.
SOOLIP, FINAL CUT.
OKAY?
WOW...
I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO WITHOUT YOU.
OH, YOU'D MANAGE, I'M SURE.
NO, I WOULDN'T, I'D PROBABLY KILL MYSELF--
OH, STOP.
I'M GOING TO LEAVE EVERYTHING TO YOU.
SHH...
YOU'RE MY FAMILY.
DO YOU WANT TO WATCH THIS AMAZING VIDEO
WITH CARMEN THAT I'M ABOUT TO LOAD IN--
NO, NO, NO, I DON'T WANT TO SEE ANY OF IT.
I CAN'T. I CAN'T.
I HAVE TO GO GET BETTE AND TINA A PRESENT.
YOU DON'T WANT THIS TO BE FROM US?
THIS IS FROM YOU.
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT?
OKAY, I'LL SEE YOU LATER.
JENNY?
GOOD LUCK IN NEW YORK.
OH, THANKS, JAMES.
HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT MOVING TO NEW YORK?
UH, NO, NO, NOT-NOT REALLY.
YEAH?
WELL, MAYBE YOU SHOULD, UH...
COME WORK FOR BETTE.
SHE HASN'T OFFERED ME A JOB.
WELL, THAT'S BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE A JOB
TO OFFER, BUT, I DON'T KNOW,
AS OF RIGHT NOW,
I DON'T KNOW THAT I EVER WOULD.
I'M SORT OF LIKING THE IDEA
OF TINA SUPPORTING ME
AND ME LOOKING AFTER THE CHILDREN.
[LAUGHTER]
WHY IS THAT SO FUNNY?
HAPPY PARTY, LADIES.
OH, THANKS.
BYE, PUMPKIN.
BYE, DADDY.
SORRY, I...
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S PERFECTLY NATURAL.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
ALL RIGHT, SWEETIE, SEE YOU.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER, BEAUTIFUL.
YES, YOU WILL, BEAUTIFUL.
[LAUGHING AND COOING]
OH, YEAH, I'LL SEE YOU LATER.
[LAUGHING]: BYE!
BYE!
OR MAYBE LIKE THEY'RE LIKE, "OH, MY GOD, ARE YOU SERIOUS?
I LIKE ORGASMS, TOO!"
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TIME, NO.
ARE YOU... DID YOU GET A GIFT,
OR ARE YOU GUYS PART OF THAT VIDEO CONTINGENT?
NO, WELL, WE RECORDED A MESSAGE.
YOU KNOW, "BEST WISHES, BETTE AND TINA."
THAT KIND OF THING.
DIDN'T YOU?
YEAH, I HAD TO.
ALTHOUGH I'M SURE JENNY WILL TAKE CREDIT
FOR EVERYTHING I SAID.
NO, I MEANT, BECAUSE DYLAN WAS OVER AT JENNY'S STUDIO--
I MEAN, SHANE'S STUDIO,
EXCUSE ME.
SO I THOUGHT SHE WAS HELPING JENNY
WORK ON THE VIDEO.
SHE'S WORK- SHE'S WORKING ON THE VIDEO?
WELL, ISN'T SHE HELPING JENNY EDIT?
I DON'T KNOW, IS SHE?
I...
SHANE SAW HER THERE EARLIER,
SO WE JUST FIGURED SHE WAS HELPING HER OUT.
WELL, ACTUALLY AT FIRST WE THOUGHT
MAYBE THEY WERE HAVING AN AFFAIR,
AND I WAS, LIKE, "YAY!"
BUT THEN I REALIZED THAT WOULD SUCK FOR YOU,
BUT, YEAH, DYLAN'S AN EDITOR, RIGHT?
SO I THOUGHT MAYBE SHE WAS HELPING JENNY... EDIT.
I THOUGHT THAT WAS WHY SHE WAS OVER AT HER STUDIO.
SHANE'S STUDIO.
YEAH, WELL...
THANK-THANKS FOR THAT.
I NEED HER NOT TO KNOW,
AND I JUST WANT YOU TO PROMISE ME
THAT YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TELL HER.
NO. YOU LIED TO ME,
AND NOW YOU'RE ASKING ME TO LIE TO COVER YOUR LIE.
I DIDN'T LIE TO YOU.
I CONFIDED IN YOU.
NO, YOU LIED TO ME,
YOU REALLY DID,
AND AFTER THAT, YOU PROMISED THAT YOU'D COME CLEAN TO HER,
AND YOU HAVEN'T DONE THAT.
BECAUSE I KNOW THAT SHE WON'T BE ABLE TO LET IT GO.
JENNY, SHE HAS A HUGE PROBLEM
WITH TRUST.
WELL, OBVIOUSLY, SHE DOES.
ARE YOU SURPRISED ABOUT THAT?
LOOK...
YOU HAD EVERY REASON TO BE SUSPICIOUS
WHEN NIKKI'S MANAGER CALLED.
YEAH, IT WAS SUSPICIOUS.
I WAS SUSPICIOUS BECAUSE I RECOGNIZE YOUR VOICE,
BECAUSE YOU DID SUCH A BAD JOB IMPERSONATING HER.
SHOULD I TELL HER THAT?
JUST TELL HER THE TRUTH.
IT'S BETTER THAT WAY,
AND THEN YOU'RE ALL EVEN.
SHE'S NOT GOING TO THINK THAT WE'RE EVEN, OKAY?
WHEN SHE FINDS OUT THAT I KNEW BEFORE I WENT INTO HIT
THAT NIKKI STEVENS WAS A SET-UP, SHE'S GOING TO THINK--
YOU'RE A LIAR...
AND YOU'RE...
A CON ARTIST,
AND THAT NONE OF THIS BODES WELL
FOR A RELATIONSHIP
THAT SHOULD BE BASED ON TRUST.
HELENA, WAIT.
BEFORE YOU GET REALLY UPSET,
NOW THAT EVERYTHING'S OUT IN THE OPEN,
M-MAYBE YOU CAN--
SO YOU KNEW ALL ALONG
THAT NIKKI STEVENS WASN'T INTERESTED IN
YOU DIRECTING HER MOVIE?
THIS WAS SUCH A BAD IDEA.
THIS WAS SO UNETHICAL,
AND I NEVER SHOULD HAVE BEEN INVOLVED IN ANY OF THIS.
AND WHEN YOU STOOD FIRM,
AND REJECTED THE PASS THAT SHE MADE AT YOU,
THAT WAS JUST AN ACT?
NO, THAT WAS NOT JUST AN ACT--
AND WHEN SHE SPILLED THE BEANS
AT MAX'S BABY SHOWER,
SHE WASN'T REALLY SPILLING ANYTHING?
JESUS, DYLAN!
THAT WAS SUCH A GOOD PERFORMANCE!
YOU'VE BEEN ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE CAMERA!
WAIT, HELENA!
THAT IS NOT HER FAULT. THAT'S MY FAULT.
FUCK YOU, SCHECTER.
YOU HAVE INTERFERED IN MY LIFE ENOUGH NOW!
YOU CREATED THIS SITUATION, NOT ME.
I'M NOT PUTTING IT ALL ON YOU, DYLAN.
WE CREATED THIS TOGETHER,
WELL, NOW I'M UN-CREATING IT, OKAY?
NO! LISTEN TO ME,
IT'S TOTALLY UNFAIR.
I-I HAD NO CHOICE.
OH, YEAH, HOW DO YOU WORK THAT OUT?
BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE WITH YOU AND YOU DIDN'T TRUST ME,
AND THEN I HAD TO PASS YOUR TEST!
I SWEAR TO YOU, I WOULD HAVE DONE
THE EXACT SAME THING WITH NIKKI STEVENS
EVEN IF JENNY HADN'T TOLD ME.
I'M NEVER GOING TO KNOW THAT FOR SURE, DYLAN.
HOW CAN I KNOW THAT?
BECAUSE YOU CAN TRUST ME.
DYLAN, I CAN'T.
NO.
THANKS TO HER,
THANKS TO JENNY FUCKING SCHECTER,
I CAN'T TRUST YOU.
MOLLY?
I THOUGHT SO. HI.
HI.
UM, I'M GOING TO GO SAY HI.
IS THAT OKAY?
YEAH.
OKAY.
HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD. HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD. YOU LOOK GREAT.
THANKS. YOU TOO.
YOU HAVE A BIG... BOWL.
YEAH.
UM, BETTE AND TINA, THEY'RE MOVING.
THEY'RE MOVING TO NEW YORK SOON,
SO THIS IS MY PRESENT TO THEM.
OH, THAT'S- THAT'S GREAT FOR THEM.
AH, IT IS WHAT IT IS.
I THINK YOU'LL BE OKAY.
SO--
HOW ARE--
NO, SORRY, GO AHEAD. NO, I...
NO, OKAY, UM...
GO FIRST, I'M SORRY.
NO, I WAS JUST GOING TO SAY
I HEARD ABOUT YOU AND JENNY, AND THAT...
IS GREAT, AND--
I GUESS, AND SURPRISING.
YEAH.
AFTER HOW UPSET SHE WAS
WITH THE WHOLE NIKKI THING,
I WOULDN'T HAVE EXPECTED THAT.
I MEAN, SHE SEEMED REALLY UPSET
THE NIGHT THAT SHE TOLD ME ABOUT YOU AND NIKKI,
SO JUST TO THINK OF YOU GUYS TOGETHER IS KIND OF...
WHERE'D THAT COME FROM, YOU KNOW?
I HAD THIS--
I'M SORRY, UH, WHAT NIGHT?
WHAT NIGHT?
THE NIGHT THAT I DROPPED OFF YOUR JACKET?
UM, ANYWAY, YEAH,
I JUST, I HAD THIS STUPID IDEA
AFTER I HEARD ABOUT WHAT MY MOM DID
THAT YOU WERE BEING SELFLESS,
AND YOU JUST DUMPED ME
BECAUSE OF THE CHALLENGE THAT MY MOM PUT TO YOU,
WHICH WAS COMPLETELY...
RIDICULOUS, AND, UM...
I THOUGHT, YOU KNOW,
THAT YOU WERE JUST TRYING TO PROTECT ME,
BECAUSE YOU KNEW YOU WOULD SCREW AROUND ON ME,
BUT, WELL, YOU ALREADY WERE SCREWING AROUND ON ME,
SO, YOU KNOW.
I JUST, I WROTE THE LETTER
BECAUSE I WANTED TO SAY ALL THIS STUFF, AND--
I'M SORRY, WAIT, UM...
UH...
UH, WHAT LETTER ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THE LETTER, IT'S IN THE POCKET OF THE JACKET
THAT I GAVE TO JENNY TO GIVE TO YOU,
BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER.
I MEAN, I'M REALLY OKAY, AND YOU DON'T--
YOU DON'T OWE ME ANYTHING....
UM, AT-AT ALL, REALLY, SO, UM...
YOU KNOW, I-I FELL FOR YOU, LIKE A MILLION OTHER GIRLS,
AND I FELL APART
LIKE A MILLION OTHER GIRLS,
BUT REALLY, YOU KNOW, I DIDN'T DIE,
AND I'M HERE,
AND I'M... OKAY.
GOOD.
YEAH, I WISH YOU AND JENNY THE BEST.
REALLY.
CAN I HELP YOU?
HUH? WHAT?
OH, UH...
NO, I'M GOING TO...
I'M GOING TO COME BACK FOR THAT LATER.
NEW YORK, HUH?
WE CAN'T WAIT FOR YOU GUYS TO VISIT.
WOW, THE HOUSE LOOKS FUCKING INCREDIBLE!
HEY...
HEY!
HEY, CAN I GET YOU A DRINK?
YEAH, UM, CAPTAIN MORGAN'S AND COKE.
OKAY.
IT'S MY FOURTH OF THE DAY.
NICE WORK.
I STARTED AT 11:00 THIS MORNING.
OH, GOD. YOU GO, GIRL.
HERE'S TO YOU, ALICE.
DRINKING MY WAY THROUGH IT.
SHE STILL HASN'T CALLED?
I'M SORRY.
WHERE'S DYLAN?
OH, MALEFICENT.
LOVELY, BETTE.
I THINK OF JENNY
AS KALI,
THE GODDESS OF DESTRUCTION.
THAT'S VERY GENEROUS OF YOU.
WHAT DID JENNY DO?
WHATEVER, IT DOESN'T REALLY MATTER NOW.
[MUTTERING]: ARE THEY HERE?
ARE THEY HERE? NO?
MAYBE SHANE THREW A BUCKET OF WATER ON HER,
AND SHE MELTED.
[LAUGHTER]
MAX, I THINK THAT'S THE FIRST MEAN THING
YOU'VE EVER SAID.
THAT'S SO FUNNY.
VERY GOOD. VERY BEAUTIFUL.
SHE REALLY SAW ME FOR WHO I AM, YOU KNOW?
SHE HELPED ME ACCEPT IT.
IT'S ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS
THAT'S EVER HAPPENED IN MY LIFE.
I NEVER KNEW ANYONE
WHO COULD SEE SOMEONE'S INNER DESIRES AND THOUGHTS
QUITE LIKE JENNY.
IT WAS KIND OF SCARY, ACTUALLY.
[CHUCKLES FONDLY]
OKAY, I HAVE DECIDED
TO MAKE UP WITH HER THIS EVENING,
FOR SHANE'S SAKE.
REALLY?
GOOD FOR YOU.
OKAY, WELL...
LET'S ALL GIVE IT A TRY.
I MEAN, WHY NOT?
YEAH, COME ON, WE CAN DO IT.
LIKE A MASS... A MASS TRY.
[CHUCKLES OF AGREEMENT]
MY FRIENDS ARE DIFFERENT.
TINA, BETTE...
ALICE, TASHA,
SHANE, MAX, KIT...
WELL, ESPECIALLY KIT.
WHAT ABOUT JENNY?
OH, WOW.
THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL.
THIS IS VERY FANCY.
I JUST...
I NEED TO CLOSE THE DOOR.
OKAY.
I DON'T WANT TO RUIN THE SURPRISE.
LOOK, IT'S THE VIDEO.
WHERE'S THE...
IS THAT... THAT CLOSES THE BLINDS?
JENNY, I HAVE A BONE TO PICK WITH YOU.
[SIGHS IN RESIGNATION]: OH, OKAY.
YOU KNOW THIS THING WITH BETTE AND KELLY?
COME ON, YOU NEED TO LET IT GO.
BETTE SAID NOTHING HAPPENED.
DO YOU ACTUALLY THINK
THAT I WANT TO HURT BETTE AND TINA?
THEN DON'T.
I DON'T WANT TO BE INVOLVED IN THIS.
I CAN SEE
THAT I'M MAKING EVERYBODY UNCOMFORTABLE.
I CAN SEE
THAT MY FRIENDS DON'T WANT TO BE AROUND ME ANYMORE,
THAT THEY WANT ME TO SHUT THE FUCK UP
AND GO AWAY.
I JUST WANT TO DO THE RIGHT THING.
WELL, BETTE SAID THAT KELLY HIT ON HER,
AND SHE REJECTED IT.
THAT'S NOT TRUE.
DO YOU HAVE PROOF?
I'M NOT A LIAR.
NO, Y-YOU DON'T HAVE PROOF.
YOU GOT...
[SCOFFING]
I DON'T WANT TO SHOW YOU.
IF YOU HAVE PROOF,
I WANT YOU TO SHOW ME.
YOU CAN PRESS PLAY.
JENNY SCHECTER.
VERY COMPLEX.
UH...
TALENTED.
SELF-DESTRUCTIVE.
SOMETIMES VERY GENEROUS,
BUT COMPLICATED.
COMPLEX.
DAMN IT.
[**]
"...I CAN'T EXPRESS HOW I FEEL ABOUT YOU..."
[**]
TELL US ABOUT THE MOVIE.
WHAT IS IT CALLED?
IT WAS CALLED "LES GIRLS,"
OR "LEZ GIRLS."
EVERYBODY PRONOUNCED IT DIFFERENTLY.
HEY, T, I'M GOING TO SHOW EVERYONE THE MASTER BEDROOM.
WHEN SHANE AND SAINT JENNY GET HERE, SEND THEM UP.
JENNY'S ALREADY HERE.
OH, SHE IS?
MM-HMM.
HERE, TRY THIS ONE.
IT'S GOOD.
OH, BE CAREFUL WHEN YOU'RE UP THERE, YOU GUYS,
BECAUSE THE CONTRACTOR BAILED OUT ON US,
AND SHE DIDN'T FINISH THE RAILING.
ALL RIGHT?
THERE'S JUST TAPE UP THERE NOW.
WOW, THIS IS THE COOLEST.
I WOULD SPEND MY LIFE IN HERE.
ALICE HAS ONE OF THE BIGGEST HEARTS
OF ANYBODY I KNOW.
SHE TAKES RISKS.
RISKS?
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYS
AREN'T GOING TO GET TO ENJOY THIS PLACE.
WELL, WE ALREADY HAVE, ACTUALLY.
OH, REALLY?
MM-HMM.
HEY, BETTE.
HEY...
H-HEY, CAN I, UH,
TALK TO YOU FOR A MINUTE?
SURE, I'LL BE RIGHT DOWNSTAIRS.
OKAY.
HI.
THE SHEETS ARE NICE.
DO YOU THINK?
I'M GOING TO GET ANOTHER DRINK.
BETTE, JENNY HAS A VIDEO
OF YOU AND KELLY.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, FROM THE OPENING OR SOMETHING?
GIRL, COME ON, NOW.
YOU KNOW, I-I THINK YOU JUST FUCKED UP.
I THINK IT'S GOING TO COME BACK,
AND IT'S JUST GOING TO SO BITE YOU IN THE ASS.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
I TOLD YOU, KELLY CAME OVER,
SHE WAS DRUNK, AND I SAID NO.
OH, GIRL, STOP, STOP!
I SAW IT. JENNY SHOWED ME THIS VIDEO
THAT SHE SHOT THROUGH YOUR WINDOW,
WITH YOUR FACE IN BETWEEN KELLY'S LEGS--
THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE!
THAT'S BULLSHIT!
I SAW IT! SHE DID IT!
DON'T LIE TO ME--
IT'S IMPOSSIBLE!
WHAT'S GOING ON, SHANE?
WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME?
WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A PARTY.
WILL YOU JUST TRUST ME, TINA.
WHERE IS EVERYBODY?
I DON'T KNOW.
DON'T I GET TO HAVE A LAWYER HERE?
NO, NO, YOU'RE ENTITLED.
I THINK THAT THE REASON
THAT NONE OF THE OTHERS HAVE ASKED FOR A LAWYER
IS THAT, UM...
WELL, THEY REALLY TRUST ONE ANOTHER.
WELL-WELL, WHAT DO YOU MEAN
"THEY REALLY TRUST ONE ANOTHER"?
YOU KNOW, I THINK THAT THEY FEEL
THAT NO ONE OF THEM
IS GOING TO SAY ANYTHING THAT WOULD HURT THE OTHER.
YOU KNOW, THEY'RE VERY, VERY CLOSE,
AND, BOY,
THEY ARE LOOKING OUT FOR ONE ANOTHER.
YOU GUYS.
YOU GUYS?
HI.
YOU GUYS, COME TO THE MEDIA ROOM,
BECAUSE THE VIDEO THAT I MADE IS ABOUT TO START.
SO, IT'S GOING TO BE ABOUT THREE HOURS LONG,
SO WE SHOULD GET STARTED.
WHERE'S SHANE?
I DON'T KNOW.
HAVE YOU SEEN BETTE AND TINA?
UM, BETTE'S UP THERE.
OKAY, I'M GOING TO GO GET BETTE AND TINA,
AND YOU GUYS SHOULD COME--
OH, YOU'RE COMING. THAT'S SO GREAT.
OKAY, I'LL JUST GO GET BETTE AND TINA.
[**]
OH, MY G...
BETTE?
WOW...
BETTE?
JENNY?
HI.
IT'S BEAUTIFUL HERE--
LOOK, I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW SOMETHING.
MY FAMILY
AND THE LIFE THAT I HAVE WORKED SO HARD
TO REBUILD FOR THEM
MEANS EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD TO ME,
AND THERE IS NOTHING THAT I WOULDN'T DO
TO PRESERVE OR PROTECT THEM.
I WOULD NEVER DO ANYTHING TO HURT YOUR FAMILY, BETTE.
I LOVE YOU.
AND I LOVE TINA.
WELL, I'M GLAD TO HEAR THAT,
BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT, I DON'T REALLY CARE--
OKAY.
IF YOU THINK THAT I FUCKED KELLY.
ALL I REALLY CARE ABOUT
IS THAT YOU KNOW
THAT I WILL NOT ABIDE ANYONE
WHO THREATENS MY FAMILY.
JENNY SCHECTER.
COMPLEX.
COMPLICATED.
TALENTED, VERY TALENTED.
SELF-DESTRUCTIVE.
SOMETIMES VERY GENEROUS.
UM...
BUT COMPLICATED.
COMPLEX, YEAH.
I WISH I COULD SAY HELLO IN PERSON.
IT'S SO EXCITING YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO NEW YORK.
CONGRATULATIONS--
JENNY?
I'M SURE, AS ALWAYS,
WHATEVER YOU TAKE ON AS A CHALLENGE,
YOU'RE GOING TO COMPLETELY--
HOW COULD YOU FUCKING DO THAT TO ME?
I'M JUST GOING TO PUT HER OUT OF HER FUCKING MISERY.
UM, I WANT TO TAKE THIS OPPORTUNITY
TO THANK YOU.
IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR YOU,
I MIGHT HAVE ENDED UP WITH THAT NUTCASE, JENNY.
HA HA. JUST KIDDING, JENNY.
COME ON, YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU,
AND, I HAVE TO SAY,
IT'S REALLY NICE OF YOU TO DO THIS.
I THINK THAT'S PRETTY COOL.
UM, WE MISS YOU GUYS...
[SIGHS HEAVILY]
I HAVE TO TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT JENNY.
I'VE DECIDED TO FORGIVE HER, AND...
MAKE PEACE WITH HER.
WHY?
I'M ALONE NOW, AND I NEED MY FRIENDS,
AND...
AND YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO BE TOGETHER.
IT'S...
WE'RE NOT TOGETHER.
I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU COULDN'T BREAK UP WITH HER?
THAT WAS THEN.
WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH WHO KILLED JENNY?
I DON'T UNDERSTAND, AT ALL, THESE QUESTIONS.
SO YOU THINK SOMEONE KILLED JENNY?
HI.
I WAS JUST CHECKING ON ANGIE.
SHE'S SOUND ASLEEP.
OH, THAT'S GOOD, THAT'S GOOD.
I WAS UPSTAIRS.
I GOT A SWEATER, I WAS COLD.
ARE YOU OKAY?
YEAH, I'M FINE.
I, UM...
I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING,
AND, UH, I JUST, I JUST DON'T KNOW--
IF YOU--
H-HAVE YOU SEEN JENNY?
UH, NO, UH--
HEY.
H-HI.
HEY, SORRY, UM...
ARE YOU OKAY?
YEAH, I WAS JUST KIND OF COLD.
I JUST WENT TO GO GET MY SWEATER.
YEAH, IT'S GETTING REALLY COLD.
YEAH.
GUESS WHAT, YOU GUYS?
I FELT IT KICK FOR THE FIRST TIME TODAY.
REALLY?
YEAH.
THAT'S GREAT.
PRETTY COOL, HUH?
CONGRATULATIONS. MAY I?
OH, YEAH.
THAT'S GREAT, MAX.
MY LITTLE BABY...
CONGRATULATIONS.
YOU SEEM GOOD.
DID YOU SEE JENNY OUT THERE?
NO.
[WHINING SOFTLY]
BETTE AND TINA, WELCOME TO NEW YORK CITY.
COME ON, THE PARTY'S WAITING FOR YOU.
KIT, YOU KNOW...
AND THE REST OF YOU, I MISS YOU.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.
YOU GUYS CHANGED MY LIFE.
I'LL NEVER FORGET ANY OF YOU.
THANKS SO MUCH,
AND, AS KIT WOULD SAY,
CONTINUE TO LIVE THE LIFE YOU LOVE
AND LOVE THE LIFE YOU LIVE.
I CERTAINLY DO.
I'M GETTING MARRIED.
IVAN, OH, MY GOD, HE LOOKS SO HANDSOME.
WOW, IVAN!
WHAT CAN I SAY.
SHE'S A CHAMPION SURFER.
[CHUCKLES]
I DON'T KNOW, I HATE THE WATER,
BUT NO MATTER WHAT, RIGHT?
IT'S ALL ABOUT THAT.
[LAUGHING]
LOOK, MY GOD. IT'S A PARADE OF ALL MY EXES.
I'M GOING TO THROW YOU A HUGE PARTY,
AND I DO MEAN A HUGE PARTY,
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW,
I'VE GOT A VERY BIG PLACE IN NEW YORK.
FIVE FLOORS,
SO THERE WOULD BE ROOM FOR ALL YOUR EXES.
MAMMA MIA, YOU'RE GOING TO NEW YORK?
THE BIG APPLE?
MARINA, WHERE IS SHE?
SOUTH OF FRANCE, I THINK.
WHAT CAN I SAY?
DID JENNY GO THERE?
[SPEAKING FRENCH]
NO, I THINK SHE SELF-TAPED
AND SENT IT TO JENNY.
AND I HOPE THAT WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO DO
IS YOU'RE GOING TO GO TO NEW YORK,
AND YOU'RE GOING TO BE FABULOUS.
WHERE IS JENNY?
--AND DON'T FORGET, LIFE IS MAGICAL.
OH, WOW, LOOK, IT'S CARMEN.
AND I WISH YOU NOTHING BUT SUCCESS,
AND HAPPINESS, AND JOY, AND...
EVERYTHING THAT THIS WORLD HAS TO OFFER,
BECAUSE, GOD KNOWS, YOU DESERVE IT.
I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE DID THAT.
WOW, JENNY WENT ALL OUT.
SHOULD WE PAUSE IT?
BECAUSE I THINK JENNY WANTED TO SEE
ALL OF YOUR REACTIONS.
NO, NO, NO.
KEEP IT GOING, NO, NO, NO. THIS IS GOOD.
WE CAN REWIND IT.
I'M SUPPOSED TO BE HER FRIEND TONIGHT,
I'LL GO FIND HER.
PAUSE IT.
NO, DON'T PAUSE IT.
[JENNY]: I'M GOING TO MISS YOU GUYS.
[SHANE]: TERRIBLY SO.
THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING.
OH YEAH, AND, UM...
YOU'RE GOING TO BE IN OUR HEARTS.
I MEAN, YOU'LL NEVER DISAPPEAR FROM THEM,
AND YOU WILL ALWAYS BE THERE...
I'M ALWAYS GOING TO HOLD A SPECIAL PLACE FOR YOU
RIGHT HERE, SO...
ENJOY NEW YORK.
WHAT MORE CAN I SAY?
YOU'RE IN OUR HEARTS.
OKAY, EVERYBODY,
SAY WE LOVE YOU TO BETTE AND TINA.
[ALL TOGETHER]: WE LOVE YOU, BETTE AND TINA!
WE'RE GOING TO MISS YOU, TINA AND BETTE!
[LAUGHING]
THAT'S IT.
[GASPING]
J-JENNY.
[VOICE BREAKING]: JENNY!
JENNY?
[JENNY ON VIDEO]: BYE, BETTE AND TINA.
I LOVE YOU GUYS.
[SIRENS WAILING]
* HAVE YOU SEEN THAT GIRL?
* THAT EVERYBODY SAYS I USED TO BE? *
* HAVE YOU SEEN THAT GIRL?
TELL ME WHAT WE KNOW.
WELL, THEY SEEMED TO BE HAVING
A PARTY OF SOME KIND.
THEY ARE SEVEN LADIES INSIDE
AND A LITTLE GIRL. SHE WAS ASLEEP.
ANY DRUGS AND ALCOHOL?
UH, COUPLE GLASSES OF WINE.
THAT'S ABOUT IT.
[**]
[DOG BARKING]
* SHE WAS FULL OF LIFE...
COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS OVER YOUR HEAD!
NICE AND HIGH.
HERE YOU GO, SWEETHEART.
NIKKI, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I-I JUST, I... I CAME TO TALK TO JENNY.
I SAW WHAT WAS GOING ON AT THE DANCE MARATHON,
AND I JUST SAW THE WAY THAT SHE WAS KEEPING YOU
LIKE A PRISONER, AND SO I JUST WANTED TO TELL HER
THAT SHE HAD TO FREE YOU, AND--
NIKKI, NIKKI, SHUT UP. NIKKI, SHUT UP.
HOLD IT!
WHAT'S GOING ON?
YOU CAN'T GO IN.
WHAT'S GOING...
I'M-I'M A POLICE OFFICER.
WELL, I'M IN THE ACADEMY, OKAY.
WHAT'S GOING ON HERE, PLEASE?
ALICE...
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
COME HERE, ARE YOU OKAY?
I'M HERE. COME HERE.
I'M HERE. I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE.
YOU KNOW, I'M AFRAID
THIS IS GOING TO TAKE A BIT LONGER THAN WE THOUGHT.
WE'LL DO WHATEVER YOU NEED FOR US TO DO.
WE'LL COOPERATE WITH YOU.
YEAH, WE'RE A VERY TIGHT-KNIT GROUP.
AND WE TAKE CARE OF EACH OTHER.
NONE OF US DID ANYTHING WRONG.
WE DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED OUT THERE.
YOU PROBABLY JUST WANT US
TO COME DOWN TO THE STATION.
RIGHT?
OH, THAT WOULD BE GREAT.
I'M JUST GOING TO GO CHANGE CLOTHES.
I'LL CALL JAMES.
YOU OKAY?
YEAH.
YOU GUYS, UM...
YOU GUYS CHANGED MY LIFE.
WOW, YOU REALLY DID...
AND I'M...
I'M NEVER GOING TO FORGET YOU.
SO THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING,
OKAY?
THAT'S IT.
[**]