PREVIOUSLY ON THE L WORD.
HELENA PEABODY.
SIT TIGHT, ALL RIGHT, BECAUSE WE'RE GOING TO GET YOU OUT.
HOW?
LOOK, I CAN'T REALLY TALK RIGHT NOW.
I JUST WANTED TO HEAR YOUR VOICE.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HOME?
SO ARE YOU SEEING ANYONE?
YOU WANT TO KNOW IF I'M GETTING LAID?
IS THAT OFF LIMITS, TOO?
YOU DO NEED TO STOP
HANGING OUT WITH BETTE SO MUCH, THOUGH.
YEAH, ESPECIALLY SINCE JODI'S COMING BACK.
I DON'T WHAT TO DO.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO DO.
I DON'T WANT TO SETTLE DOWN.
PLAY THE FIELD.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL I'M GOING TO TELL JOYCE.
BUT YOU'RE NOT IN LOVE WITH ME.
SO I TAKE IT YOU DON'T WANT TO FILE A REPORT.
NO, I DON'T WANT TO FILE A REPORT.
I REWROTE THE SCRIPT WHILE I WAS IN TULUM,
AND THAT'S WHERE I...
I JUST RAN INTO MONSIEUR.
WHO?
THIS HEDGE FUND BILLIONAIRE
WHO'S FINANCING OUR NEXT THREE PROJECTS.
JENNY HAS A VERY SPECIAL INSIGHT
INTO THIS WORLD.
SHE'S THE ONLY PERSON WHO COULD POSSIBLY DIRECT THE PICTURE.
DIRECTING?
"LEZ GIRLS?"
MORE LESBIAN SEX. I WANT MORE OF IT.
YOU'RE THE ONES WHO TOLD ME
LESBIANS ARE ALWAYS SLEEPING WITH THEIR FRIENDS.
SO LET'S SEE IT.
SEE THEM HOOK UP.
FOR EXAMPLE,
PAGE 31, SCENE 43.
I THINK WE'RE MISSING AN OPPORTUNITY HERE.
I THINK BEV AND THIS MAKEUP ARTIST
SHOULD TOTALLY HOOK UP.
THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN!
THINK ABOUT IT.
I MEAN, JUST BECAUSE IT DIDN'T HAPPEN IN REAL LIFE
DOESN'T MEAN IT CAN'T HAPPEN IN THE MOVIES--IT'S HOLLYWOOD.
WE CAN DO WHATEVER THE HELL WE WANT.
YOU SEEM TO BE FORGETTING THAT BEV AND NINA ARE TOGETHER.
SHE CHEATS WITH THE PLUMBER!
I LIKE THE IDEA OF BEV AS THE SERIAL CHEATER.
IT UNDERMINES THE SIGNIFICANCE OF HER AFFAIR WITH THE PLUMBER.
NOW, THIS MIGHT BE CRAZY,
BUT WHAT ABOUT NINA AND SHAUN?
NO! NO.
NOBODY EVER WANTS TO SEE NINA HAVING SEX.
NO ONE WILL EVER GO TO THE FILM.
IT'S NOT ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE WANT TO SEE.
IT'S ABOUT THE FACT THAT NINA IS TOO LOYAL TO CHEAT.
IT GOES AGAINST HER NATURE.
OKAY, I LIKE THE IDEA OF BEV AS THE CHEATER.
I DON'T SEE HER WITH SHAUN.
WHAT ABOUT BEV AND HELEN?
NOW, THAT'S HOT. I LIKE THAT.
THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN.
THEY'RE TOO MUCH ALIKE.
OKAY, BUT THEY'RE NOT HAVING A RELATIONSHIP, TINA.
THEY'RE JUST FUCKING.
I DON'T BUY IT.
WELL, NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU BUY, OKAY?
[**]
* GIRLS IN TIGHT DRESSES WHO DRAG WITH MUSTACHES *
* CHICKS DRIVING FAST INGENUES WITH LONG LASHES *
* WOMEN WHO LONG, LOVE, LUST WOMEN WHO GIVE *
* THIS IS THE WAY IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE *
* TALKING, LAUGHING LOVING, BREATHING *
* FIGHTING, FUCKING CRYING, DRINKING *
* WRITING, WINNING LOSING, CHEATING *
* KISSING, THINKING, DREAMING
* THIS IS THE WAY...
* IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE *
* IT'S THE WAY THAT WE LIVE
* AND LOVE
[SHANE]: YEAH, I KNOW HE'S FINANCING YOUR MOVIE, JENNY.
I WOULD LOVE TO.
NO, I WOULD BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO WORK ON THE PHONE.
ALL RIGHT, WELL, LET'S SEE HOW TODAY GOES,
AND I'LL GIVE YOU A CALL, OR YOU ASK HIM.
* STILETTO HEEL AND FURRY CAR *
* I LIVE MY LIFE BEYOND THE LAW *
* THE THINGS I DO YOU NEVER TRY *
* WHAT I GOT FREE YOU GOTTA BUY *
* GATECRASHER
* GET OUTTA MY WAY *
* GATECRASHER
* YOU GOT NOTHING TO SAY *
* GATECRASHER
* WE'RE SICK OF YOU *
* GATECRASHER GATECRASHER *
HI. I'M SHANE.
OH. OF COURSE. WE'VE BEEN EXPECTING YOU.
COME ON IN.
THANK YOU.
THANKS FOR COMING ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE.
SURE.
MADISON'S STYLIST HAD TO FLY BACK EAST
FOR SOME FAMILY EMERGENCY.
OH, I'M GLAD JENNY CALLED ME.
WELL, MY HUSBAND, WILLIAM,
IS SPENDING A FORTUNE ON HER MOVIE.
YOU, UH...
YOU'VE GOT A REALLY NICE PLACE.
I'M GLAD YOU LIKE IT.
I DO.
THIS WAY.
HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU
TO STOP TOUCHING YOUR FACE?
AND SIT UP STRAIGHT.
SHANE'S HERE TO DO YOUR HAIR.
SHANE, THIS IS MADISON, THE BRIDE.
CONGRATULATIONS. HI.
HI, SHANE.
AND THAT'S ABIGAIL,
HER SISTER, MAID OF HONOR.
AND GINA, ONE OF THE BRIDESMAIDS.
HOW YOU DOING?
HI.
THE PHOTOGRAPHER'S GOING TO BE HERE
IN TWO AND A HALF HOURS.
I HOPE THAT'S ENOUGH TIME.
OH, NO, NO, NO. THAT'LL BE PLENTY.
OH, GREAT, BECAUSE
I'M GOING TO NEED YOU TO DO ME
WHEN YOU'RE FINISHED WITH THEM.
NO PROBLEM.
WHO WOULD LIKE TO GO FIRST?
THANKS.
HEY, YOU THINK TINA'S ON A DATE?
KIND OF LOOKS LIKE IT, DOESN'T IT?
WE TOOK HER TO
THESE PRESCHOOL INTERVIEWS LAST WEEK.
SHE WAS SO IMPRESSIVE.
IT AMAZES ME HOW SMART SHE IS.
AND SHE'S REALLY STARTING TO SHOW SOME ARTISTIC TALENT,
WHICH MAKES BETTE REALLY HAPPY.
IS BETTE AN ARTIST?
OH, NO, NO,
BUT SHE'S THE DEAN OF CU'S SCHOOL OF THE ARTS,
AND BEFORE, SHE WAS THE DIRECTOR OF THE CAC,
AND BEFORE THAT, SHE WAS A GALLERY OWNER.
SO ART IS PRETTY IMPORTANT TO HER.
MY GOD, THAT'S AN UNDERSTATEMENT.
IT'S HER LIFE.
WHEN WE WERE LOOKING FOR DONORS,
SHE INSISTED THAT HE BE AN ARTIST,
AND NOT JUST ANY ARTIST.
HE HAD TO HAVE MADE THE WHITNEY BIENNIAL.
IT'S VERY TYPICAL BETTE.
SHE SOUNDS NEUROTIC.
OH, I MEAN, NOT IN A BAD WAY.
ANYWAY, SHE REALLY WANTS ANGIE TO BE AN ARTIST.
DON'T YOU THINK THAT'S SOMETHING
SHE SHOULD LET ANGIE DECIDE FOR HERSELF?
OH, YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
SHE WOULD NEVER.
I MEAN, WE WOULD...
NEVER FORCE HER
TO BE ANYTHING THAT SHE DIDN'T WANT TO BE.
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT SAID THAT MARRIAGE WAS FOR LOSERS,
SO WHY ARE YOU DOING IT?
TO MAKE DADDY HAPPY.
ANYWAY, YOU'RE JUST BITTER.
SHANE, SHE CHEATED WITH A MARRIED MAN.
HE SAID HE WAS GONNA LEAVE HIS WIFE.
NOW SHE'S BITTER.
FUCK OFF, MADDY.
I DON'T KNOW WHY ANYONE WOULD GET MARRIED.
I MEAN, LOOK AT OUR PARENTS. THEY'RE MISERABLE.
ARE YOU MARRIED, SHANE?
NO.
DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?
NO.
DO YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
NOT ANYMORE.
BUT YOU LIKE GIRLS?
YES, I DO.
DOES THAT MEAN YOU'LL NEVER GET MARRIED?
GAY PEOPLE AREN'T ALLOWED TO GET MARRIED, IDIOT.
YEAH, I KNOW,
BUT THEY CAN STILL PRETEND.
WELL, I DON'T THINK IT'S FOR ME,
BUT I ADMIRE PEOPLE WHO DO IT.
DESPITE WHY THEY'RE DOING IT.
YOU ARE SO GOOD, SHANE.
I WISH YOU COULD DO MY HAIR EVERY DAY.
I'LL BET YOU DO.
SHUT UP, MADDY.
OKAY, I'M NEXT NOW.
DO ME!
HI.
I THINK IT'S JUST A MATTER OF EXPOSING HER
TO ALL SORTS OF...
EXPRESSIONS, ART,
YOU KNOW, MUSIC, ALL OF THAT,
AND THEN WHEN THE TIME COMES,
SHE CAN MAKE AN EDUCATED DECISION
ABOUT WHAT SHE WANTS TO DO.
OH, HI. SORRY.
THAT'S OKAY, HI.
HI. HI.
DENISE, THIS IS, UH, THIS IS BETTE.
THE FAMOUS BETTE.
FAMOUS? DID I MISS SOMETHING?
NO, WE WERE JUST--
TINA'S JUST TOLD ME A LOT ABOUT YOU.
ALL GOOD STUFF.
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT ANGELICA, ACTUALLY.
SHE'S REALLY BEAUTIFUL.
YOU'VE MET HER?
NO. TINA SHOWED ME A PICTURE.
WELL, WE'RE JUST HAVING LUNCH OVER THERE
IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU WANT TO JOIN US.
NO. I THINK WE'LL STAY.
YOU KNOW WHAT? GO AHEAD.
IT'S OKAY.
I HAVE TO GET BACK TO THE OFFICE ANYWAY.
ARE YOU SURE? ABSOLUTELY.
IT WAS LOVELY TO MEET YOU.
YES, NICE TO MEET YOU, TOO.
I'LL BE RIGHT OVER.
OKAY.
MAYBE WE CAN DO THIS ANOTHER TIME.
I THINK YOU HAVE SOME THINGS TO FIGURE OUT.
SHOWER TIME, LADIES.
YOU KNOW THERE'S STALLS IN THERE, RIGHT?
DOOR'S LOCKED.
THAT'S WEIRD.
WELL, I GUESS THAT'S WHAT YOU GET
FOR HANGING OUT AT THE PLANET, RIGHT?
RIGHT. AFTER YOU.
NO, AFTER YOU.
THANKS, MAN.
THANK YOU.
SO?
HOW'D IT GO WITH DENISE?
IT WAS GREAT. YEAH?
MM-HMM.
GOOD.
I THINK WE'RE GONNA GET TOGETHER AGAIN.
THAT'S GREAT, T.
SO WHAT DOES SHE DO?
WHY WOULD YOU ASK THAT?
THAT'S A HIDEOUS QUESTION.
I'M JUST CURIOUS.
SHE'S A MORTGAGE BROKER.
WOW, THAT'S SO...
YOU KNOW WHAT?
IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT SHE DOES,
BECAUSE SHE'S CUTE AND SHE'S SMART, RIGHT?
THAT'S RIGHT.
YOU KNOW, REMEMBER WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT?
MM-HMM.
SO IS TASHA BACK FOR GOOD?
YEAH. WHAT HAPPENED?
OH, NOTHING HAPPENED.
I MEAN, I THINK THEY JUST--
I THINK THERE'S A MILLION REASONS
WHY THEY CAN GET DELAYED.
YOU CAN ASK HER ABOUT IT TONIGHT, THOUGH.
THE FOUR OF YOU
ARE GOING ON A DOUBLE DATE?
I JUST PISSED NEXT TO THE CUTEST BOY ALIVE.
REALLY? WHO?
I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T SEE HIM.
I JUST GOT A TEXT FROM SHANE.
SHE SAYS YOUR BOSS'S HOUSE IS REALLY HUGE.
NOT AS BIG AS MY BOSS'S EGO.
SHANE'S DOING HAIR FOR HIS DAUGHTER'S WEDDING.
WEDDING. I FORGOT TO PICK UP MY DRESS.
I HAVE TO GO PICK UP MY DRESS.
I'M SORRY. REALLY?
HAVE FUN.
OKAY.
YOU KNOW HOW SHANE'S DOING?
I THINK SHE JUST WANTS TO GET PAST THE PAIGE STUFF.
DO YOU GUYS REALLY THINK THAT PAIGE BURNED WAX DOWN?
I DON'T THINK IT COULD BE MORE OBVIOUS.
REALLY.
SHE MUST HAVE BEEN REALLY ANGRY.
WELL, SHE'S LUCKY
THAT SHANE DOESN'T WANT TO PROSECUTE.
I'M JUST WORRIED ABOUT SHANE,
BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING'S ESCALATING.
ESCALATING?
WELL...
YEAH.
WE USED TO SAY
THAT EVERY TIME SHANE WALKED INTO A ROOM,
SOME GIRL LEFT CRYING.
BUT NOW...
NO ONE'S EVER REALLY COMMITTED ARSON OVER SHANE BEFORE.
LIKE, WHAT'S NEXT?
YOU'RE SO GOOD.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING TO ME,
BUT DO THAT!
DON'T STOP.
I WISH MY SISTER COULD GET MARRIED EVERY DAY.
[KNOCKING]
COME.
WELL, I DIDN'T EXPECT TO SEE YOU BACK HERE SO SOON, WILLIAMS.
ALTHOUGH I CAN'T SAY I'M SORRY.
IT GOT MIGHTY LONELY AROUND HERE AFTER Y'ALL SHIPPED OUT.
WELL, MAYBE YOU NEED TO SIGN YOURSELF UP
FOR ACTIVE DUTY, BEECH,
INSTEAD OF GETTING FAT,
SITTING UP HERE BEHIND THIS DESK.
WELL, SOMEBODY'S GOTTA STICK AROUND HERE,
MAKE SURE Y'ALL DON'T GO RUNNING OFF HALF COCKED.
HUH?
SO, WHAT'S THE DEAL, WILLIAMS?
TO WHAT DO I OWE THE UNEXPECTED PRIVILEGE?
I'M SEEKING COUNSEL.
I'VE BEEN TOLD I'M UNDER INVESTIGATION.
DO YOU KNOW THE NATURE OF THE COMPLAINT?
WELL, I HAVEN'T BEEN FORMALLY NOTIFIED.
I BELIEVE I'M BEING INVESTIGATED FOR HOMOSEXUAL CONDUCT.
WELL...
I'M VERY SORRY TO HEAR THAT.
I'D LIKE TO START PREPARING MY DEFENSE.
WELL, I HAVEN'T BEEN DETAILED
TO YOUR CASE, CAPTAIN WILLIAMS,
AND AS YOU CAN SEE, I'VE GOT A VERY HEAVY WORKLOAD OF MY OWN.
LOOK, I'M NOT TRYING TO OVERBURDEN YOU.
I NEED SOME ADVICE.
WELL, MY BEST ADVICE TO YOU IS TO MIND YOUR "P"S AND "Q"S
AND THINK ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT YOU WANT TO STAY IN THE SERVICE.
I DON'T HAVE TO THINK ABOUT THAT.
I'VE DEDICATED MY LIFE TO THE MILITARY.
I'M SURE YOU HAVE,
BUT ALLEGATIONS LIKE THIS
ARE ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO DISPROVE...
MOSTLY BECAUSE THEY END UP BEING TRUE,
AND ONCE THEY'RE OUT,
THE MILITARY DOESN'T WANT YOU ANYMORE.
WHICH IS UNDERSTANDABLE, DON'T YOU THINK?
THERE HE IS.
BEAUTIFUL BOY WITH THE CRYSTAL BLUE EYES.
MAX?
HE'S GAY, RIGHT?
PLEASE TELL ME HE'S GAY.
UM...
WHAT? IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH HIM?
NO. HE'S VERY NICE.
YEAH, HE'S JUST-- HE'S NOT GAY...ANYMORE.
ANYMORE?
SO HE USED TO BE GAY?
WELL, NOT EXACTLY.
WELL, NOT EXACTLY?
HE USED TO BE A LESBIAN.
HE'S A TRANSMAN.
OH, MY GOD, I HAD NO IDEA.
HEY, I'LL SEE YOU GUYS LATER.
BYE. LOVE YA, LOVE YA.
HEY, IT'S HOT, HOT, HOT.
THANKS, KIT.
HEY, DO YOU KNOW THAT GIRL OVER THERE?
THAT GIRL?
MM-HMM.
THE ONE THAT'S BEEN SITTING THERE
FOR THREE DAYS IN THE SAME OLD CLOTHES?
DID YOU SEE WHAT SHE'S READING?
OH.
HEY THERE.
OH, HI. I'M SORRY.
DO YOU WANT ME TO PAY?
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
I JUST CAME OVER TO SEE IF YOU WANTED SOMETHING ELSE.
NO, I'M GOOD, THANKS.
I CAN'T REALLY AFFORD ANYTHING ELSE, ANYWAY.
I'M SORRY, $7.00 FOR A SLICE OF PIE,
I KNOW IT'S A LOT.
NO, I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT.
WELL, HOW ABOUT IF YOU HAVE ONE ON ME?
I MEAN, THE PEAR POLENTA TART.
NO, I COULDN'T--
COME ON. YOU CAN HAVE ONE, ALL RIGHT?
ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW WHAT? I AM STARVING.
THANK YOU.
SO, HOW'S THE BOOK?
SOME OF HER PARTS?
IT'S LIKE MY FIFTH TIME READING IT.
JENNIFER SCHECTER IS MY FAVORITE AUTHOR.
YOU SEE THAT YOUNG MAN OVER THERE?
HE LIVES WITH HER.
YOU WANT TO MEET HIM?
NO.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, I COULDN'T.
OH, YEAH, COME ON, COME ON.
COME ON, YOU'RE GOING TO. YEAH, BABY GIRL.
YOU'RE GOING TO GET YOUR BUTT UP.
COME ON. COME ON, COME ON, COME ON.
OKAY.
MAX, MAX. WHAT WAS YOUR NAME AGAIN?
ADELE. ADELE CHANNING. HI.
HI. I'M MAX SWEENEY.
AND I'M KIT PORTER.
IT IS SO NICE TO MEET YOU.
[SHANE]: OKAY.
NOW YOU'RE VAGUELY ROCKING.
GO GET MARRIED.
GOOD LUCK.
SHANE?
THERE YOU ARE.
LOOK WHAT HAPPENED.
SORRY, EXCUSE ME. SORRY.
EXCUSE ME. UM, COULD I HAVE A MEDIUM TRIPLE SOY CAPPUCCINO
WITH THREE PUMPS OF VANILLA, PLEASE?
CAN YOU ALSO PUT IT ON MY TAB? THANK YOU.
IS THIS THE FAMOUS JENNY SCHECTER?
KIT, IT'S SUCH A NIGHTMARE.
MY FUCKING ASSISTANT, MARISSA, QUIT ON ME,
AND I'VE BEEN WRITING ALL MORNING
AND I HAVE TO BE AT A WEDDING IN ONE HOUR
AND I DON'T HAVE A WEDDING GIFT.
CAN YOU TAKE A MINUTE?
THERE'S SOMEONE REALLY SPECIAL I'D LOVE FOR YOU TO MEET.
IT'S JUST GOING TO CRUSH THE DRESS.
I DON'T...
YOU CAN DO IT. YES, YES, YOU CAN.
COME ON, COME ON, COME ON, COME ON.
KIT, I HAVE TO GO BUY MY SATIN SHOES.
NO, NO SATIN--
ADELE, I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET JENNY SCHECTER.
OH, MY GOD.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M MEETING YOU.
YOU ARE. IT'S GREAT.
YOU'VE MET ME.
MAX, WILL YOU PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO ME A FAVOR?
JENNY, ADELE'S A HUGE FAN OF YOURS.
SHE'S READ YOUR BOOK FIVE TIMES.
SOME OF HER PARTS, RIGHT?
YEAH, AND--AND--
THUS SPOKE SARAH SCHUSTER 25 TIMES.
THAT'S NICE.
I ADAPTED IT AS A SCREENPLAY
FOR MY WOMEN'S STUDIES CLASS.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU ADAPTED IT?
OH, BUT ONLY... ONLY AS A CLASS EXERCISE,
I MEAN, NOT AS A PUBLICATION.
AND WHAT SCHOOL DID YOU GO TO, ELAINE?
I WENT TO THE UNIVERSITY OF CENTRAL FLORIDA.
[MAX]: JENNY, HER NAME'S ADELE.
I'VE GOT TO GO.
WHY DON'T YOU COME AND SIT
AND HAVE SOME COFFEE WITH US?
YEAH, COME ON, COME ON.
NO, I DON'T WANT TO.
YES, YES, YES, YES.
UH, WOULD YOU BRING HER COFFEE OVER, PLEASE?
OH, THAT'S GOOD.
OH, RIGHT THERE.
[MOANING]
[CRYING]
WHAT?
WHAT, DID I HURT YOU? DID I HURT YOU?
NO.
ARE YOU SURE?
NO, I'M FINE.
EVERYTHING'S GOING TO BE FINE NOW.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
THAT ASSHOLE REX IS HERE WITH HIS WIFE.
I WANT HIM TO SEE ME WITH YOU.
PLEASE DON'T LEAVE MY SIDE TONIGHT.
DON'T LEAVE ME.
HELLO, GORGEOUS.
JOYCE.
NO.
YES.
AND DON'T SAY I SHOULDN'T HAVE.
"SHOULDN'T HAVE" MAKES ME WANT TO DO IT MOST.
JOYCE, COME SIT DOWN A MINUTE.
YEAH.
WHAT IS IT, PHYLLIS? WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND?
THIS IS HARD.
WELL, WHATEVER IT IS, JUST SAY IT.
YOU MADE A LOVELY PROPOSAL TO ME,
AND I WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND HOW VERY MUCH IT MEANT TO ME
THAT YOU WOULD WANT TO.
TO U-HAUL WITH ME?
OH, GOD, I'LL NEVER FORGET YOU SAYING THAT.
THAT WAS SO CUTE.
IT WAS?
IT WAS.
PHYLLIS, LOOK.
I KNOW YOU JUST GOT OUT OF A 30-YEAR MARRIAGE,
AND IF YOU NEED TO TAKE A LITTLE MORE TIME,
JUST TAKE IT.
I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE.
SO, YOU'RE OKAY WITH ME SEEING OTHER PEOPLE?
WHAT?
NO. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEAN.
PLEASE UNDERSTAND.
NO, THERE'S NO UNDERSTANDING HERE, PHYLLIS,
I'M NOT OKAY WITH THAT.
ARE YOU ALREADY SEEING SOMEBODY?
NO...
NO, I MEAN, I WANT TO,
BUT...
I TOLD CAMILLA THAT I HAD TO TALK TO YOU
BEFORE WE DID ANYTHING.
CAMILLA?
MY FRIEND?
JOYCE, SHE IS NOT YOUR FRIEND.
WELL, SHE'S A FRIEND OF A FRIEND,
AND YOU MET HER AT THAT PARTY I THREW FOR YOU.
WE BOTH FEEL REALLY BAD ABOUT THIS,
BUT COME ON, DON'T TAKE IT THAT WAY.
IT'S NOT, LIKE, YOU KNOW, YOU VS. CAMILLA.
THIS IS FOUL PLAY.
I'M SO SORRY, JOYCE.
THANK YOU.
PHYLLIS, YOU'RE BEING RASH.
VERY RASH.
I'M GOING TO LEAVE NOW AND GIVE YOU SOME TIME
TO THINK ABOUT YOUR ACTIONS
SO YOU DON'T DO SOMETHING YOU WILL REGRET LATER.
I WENT ON SCHOLARSHIP,
SO IT'S THE ONLY SCHOOL IN ORLANDO
THAT HAS BOTH A WOMEN'S STUDIES PROGRAM
AND A FILM PROGRAM.
HOW COME YOU WANTED TO GO
TO FILM SCHOOL IN ORLANDO?
IF YOU DON'T MIND ME ASKING.
BECAUSE SHE LOVES DISNEY WORLD.
NO.
WELL, I JUST...
I ALSO WAS OFFERED A SCHOLARSHIP TO NYU,
WHICH IS, OF COURSE, WHERE I WANTED TO GO,
BUT MY MOM HAD KIND OF A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN
AFTER MY DAD LEFT HER, SO.
I JUST STAYED TO TAKE CARE OF HER.
IS YOUR MOM OKAY NOW?
UM, YEAH. SHE'S BETTER, SHE'S BETTER.
WE JUST-- WE HAD A TOUGH TIME.
YOU KNOW?
I STAYED TO TAKE CARE OF HER,
BUT THEN SHE STILL TOOK A LOT OF ANGER OUT ON ME.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
IT WAS READING THIS BOOK
THAT GOT ME THROUGH THAT TIME.
IT WAS READING SOME OF HER PARTS.
I MEAN, THIS BOOK...
SAVED MY LIFE.
WHAT A NICE THING TO SAY.
ISN'T THAT, JENNY?
MM-HMM.
I WENT OUT AND I FOUND
EVERY SINGLE THING I COULD BY JENNIFER SCHECTER.
I FOUND YOUR FIRST SHORT STORY COLLECTION.
I READ THOSE STORIES OVER AND OVER AND OVER.
MISS SCHECTER, I JUST-- I CAN'T TELL YOU--
OH. JENNY.
OKAY, JENNY.
DO YOU KNOW WHY I'M HERE?
NO. IN WEST HOLLYWOOD?
I'M HERE BECAUSE I HEARD SOMEWHERE
THAT THIS CAFE WAS THE INSPIRATION
FOR THE PLUTO CAFE IN "LEZ GIRLS."
I'M JUST-- I'M SO HONORED TO MEET YOU.
IT'S VERY NICE TO MEET YOU, TOO.
HEY, JENNY, AREN'T YOU LATE
FOR A WEDDING OR SOMETHING?
WHAT TIME IS IT? IT'S 10 TO 2:00.
THAT FUCKING ASSISTANT, MARISSA,
WAS SUPPOSED TO GET THE GIFT, AND NOW I DON'T HAVE A GIFT.
SO WHAT? YOU CAN JUST GET ONE AFTER.
I MEAN, I'M SURE THEY'RE REGISTERED.
I'M SO SORRY. THIS IS MY FAULT.
CAN I DO ANYTHING FOR YOU?
I MEAN, I'M NOT SURE, UNLESS--
I DON'T KNOW,
UNLESS YOU WANT TO GO TO GEARY'S OR WILLIAMS SONOMA,
WHERE THEY'RE REGISTERED,
AND MAYBE PICK UP A GIFT ON MY BEHALF
AND DROP IT OFF AT THEIR WEDDING?
SURE, YEAH, YEAH. DEFINITELY, OF COURSE.
I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO.
OH, GOOD. OKAY, GOOD, GOOD, GOOD.
COME ON.
YOU CAN HELP ME PICK OUT A PERFECT PAIR OF SATIN SHOES,
MAYBE CARRY THAT FOR ME,
AND TELL ME MORE ABOUT YOUR EXPERIENCE IN FLORIDA.
WOW.
YOU WANTED THAT JOB, DIDN'T YOU?
AS IF.
NO, THOSE DAYS ARE GONE.
LOOKS LIKE NOBODY WARNED HER ABOUT DROPPING THE SOAP.
IT JUST SLIPPED FROM MY HAND.
"IT JUST SLIPPED FROM MY HAND."
YOU HEAR THAT, BILLY?
SHE'S A FLUFF.
ARE YOU A FLUFF, PRETTY GIRL?
I'M SORRY.
MAYBE IF YOU COULD JUST EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THAT IS.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE IN FOR A REAL TREAT, GIRLFRIEND.
GET AWAY FROM ME OR I'M GOING TO CALL SECURITY.
OH...
OOH! SHE'S STRONG, TOO.
I WANT YOU TO CLICK UP. BLOOD IN.
IT INVOLVES BLOOD?
YOU'RE SUCH A PRETTY GIRL.
IT WOULD BE AN AWFUL SHAME
IF SOMETHING WERE TO HAPPEN
TO THAT PRETTY FACE.
LET HER GO, JACKIE.
WHY SHOULD I?
BECAUSE SHE'S WITH ME.
SUIT YOURSELF.
BUT I'D KEEP MY EYE ON HER IF I WERE YOU.
HE LOOKED AT ME LIKE I HAD A FUCKING DISEASE.
I THOUGHT YOU GUYS ALREADY KNEW EACH OTHER.
WE WENT THROUGH LEADERSHIP TOGETHER,
BUT I DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS SUCH A FUCKING SOUTHERN BOY.
HE HASN'T EVEN SEEN ACTION.
HE'D PROBABLY SHIT HIS FUCKING PANTS
IF HIS BUDDY GOT HIS SKULL BLOWN OFF
NEXT TO HIM.
WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
THE GOOD THING IS YOU KNOW WHERE HE STANDS
AND NOW YOU CAN GO GET YOURSELF A LAWYER
THAT'S NOT IN THE MILITARY, RIGHT?
I CAN'T AFFORD A CIVILIAN ATTORNEY.
LET ME HELP YOU, TASH.
AND I DON'T WANT A CIVILIAN ATTORNEY.
WHY?
BECAUSE IF I HIRE A CIVILIAN ATTORNEY,
THEN I'M BASICALLY JUST ADMITTING
THAT I'M LOOKING TO GET AN HONORABLE DISCHARGE.
NOW, BEECH SAID THAT
IT'S ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO DEFEND
A DON'T ASK, DON'T TELL CASE,
BECAUSE THE ALLEGATIONS ARE USUALLY TRUE.
WELL, THEN FORGET BEECH.
HE'S OBVIOUSLY A SHITTY LAWYER.
YOU CAN WIN THIS.
AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHY THE ARMY TRIES TO KEEP GAYS OUT OF THE MILITARY, ANYWAY.
I'M NOT FIGHTING TO ALLOW GAYS TO SERVE OPENLY IN THE MILITARY.
I'M NOT EVEN TRYING TO OVERTURN DON'T ASK, DON'T TELL.
THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN RIGHT NOW.
THEN WHAT ARE YOU FIGHTING FOR?
I'M FIGHTING TO STAY IN THE MILITARY.
I'VE WORKED MY WHOLE LIFE FOR THIS, ALICE.
SO, YOU'VE WORKED YOUR WHOLE LIFE
TO JUST DENY WHO YOU ARE?
I'M SORRY, TASHA.
I'M REALLY JUST GOING TO HAVE TO
ADJUST MY THINKING ON THIS ONE.
I'M ON YOUR SIDE, THOUGH.
HEY?
I AM.
[WEDDING MARCH PLAYS]
I'M SO SORRY.
I'M SO SORRY...
THAT I'M LATE.
YEAH, WE WERE ALL WAITING.
OH, I'M SORRY.
I DIDN'T MEAN TO MAKE YOU WAIT.
NICE DRESS.
THANKS, TINA.
[WOMAN]: HONEY? HONEY?
HONEY?
[MUTTERING]
HAVE YOU SEEN SHANE?
NO.
I ALWAYS DO EVERYTHING I'M SUPPOSED TO DO.
EVERYTHING MY FATHER WANTS.
I TRY SO HARD TO PLEASE HIM, BUT HE'S NEVER PLEASED.
WELL...
FORGETTING YOUR FATHER FOR A SECOND,
WHAT IS IT THAT YOU WANT?
NOBODY'S EVER ASKED ME THAT BEFORE.
WELL, DO YOU LOVE HIM?
OF COURSE, I LOVE HIM. HE'S MY FATHER.
I DON'T MEAN YOUR FATHER.
I MEAN YOUR FIANCE.
HE'S SWEET,
AND HE TREATS ME WELL.
GOOD.
ARE YOU IN THERE? JUST A SECOND.
EVERYBODY IS WAITING, SWEETHEART.
DO YOU...
DO YOU TWO HAVE ANYTHING IN COMMON?
THANKS.
WE'RE BOTH ADVENTUROUS.
WE LOVE TO TRAVEL.
AND...
WE LIKE TO RIDE HORSES A LOT.
THAT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE COMPATIBLE.
DOES HE LISTEN TO YOU?
HE ALWAYS LOOKS ME RIGHT IN THE EYE.
IS HE FAITHFUL?
I'M PRETTY SURE.
GOOD.
THAT'S MORE THAN WHAT MOST PEOPLE CAN SAY.
YOU DO LOOK BEAUTIFUL.
YOUR HAIR IS STAYING PUT.
YOU'RE GOING TO BE FINE.
YOU REALLY ARE. YOU'RE GOING TO BE OKAY.
WHAT IF THERE'S SOMETHING BETTER OUT THERE?
I MEAN, BRETT'S SWEET, BUT...
HE DOESN'T MAKE ME FEEL
LIKE WE'RE GONNA ROCK THE WORLD TOGETHER.
MADISON...
IT SOUNDS LIKE WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR
IS SOMETHING THAT...
THAT YOU HAVE TO DO ON YOUR OWN,
AND NO ONE CAN HELP YOU FIND IT,
BUT AT THE SAME TIME,
FROM WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME,
IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU AND BRETT
ARE GOING TO BE GREAT TOGETHER.
DON'T THROW THAT AWAY.
IT'S NOT THAT EASY TO FIND.
AND...
WOW, YOU REALLY...
REMIND ME OF SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW.
A LOT.
NO, NO, NO, IT'S...
IT'S A COMPLIMENT.
WELL, YOU'VE ONLY GOT ONE SHOT.
YOU MIGHT AS WELL GO DO IT.
WHAT DID THEY SAY?
WHAT WERE THE ACTUAL WORDS?
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
UM, I THINK SHE SAID SOMETHING ABOUT "CLICKING."
DID SHE TELL YOU TO CLICK UP?
YES!
IT MEANS JUST JOIN A GANG.
SHE JUST WANTS YOU TO JOIN A GANG.
WHAT USE AM I GOING TO BE TO A PRISON GANG?
REALLY? DOES THAT MEAN THAT DUSTY IS IN A GANG, TOO?
WHO'S DUSTY?
DUSTY, MY CELLMATE,
THE ONE WHO I SAID STEPPED IN, WENT UP TO JACKIE AND SAID...
SHE SAID, "SHE'S WITH ME."
OKAY, GIRL, BABY GIRL,
THAT MEANS THAT IF JACKIE EVEN LOOK AT YOU WRONG,
SHE HAS TO ANSWER TO DUSTY.
GIRL, I HOPE DUSTY IS TOUGH ENOUGH
TO TAKE CARE OF YOU.
OH, SHE'S STRONG.
SHE'S AMAZINGLY STRONG.
SHE DOESN'T TALK MUCH, BUT--
WHEN I FIRST MET HER,
I THOUGHT SHE WAS A HOMICIDAL MANIAC.
A HOMICIDAL MANIAC WHO SAVED YOUR BUTT.
YEAH.
YEAH, I'VE BEEN WATCHING HER.
WOW, SHE'S GOT THIS KIND OF QUIET INTENSITY.
SHE'S FASCINATING, ACTUALLY.
SHE SOUNDS LIKE SHE'S INDEPENDENT, GIRL,
AND THAT'S THE KIND OF FRIEND YOU WANT.
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
HOW DO YOU KNOW ALL THIS?
I'VE BEEN PLACES, OKAY?
SHIT, HAVE I.
SO SOMETIMES THEY TELL YOU WHY YOU'RE BEING DELAYED,
BUT THEY DON'T NECESSARILY HAVE TO TELL YOU?
UM, YEAH. PRETTY MUCH.
I MEAN, YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING FOR SURE
UNTIL YOU'RE ON THAT PLANE HALFWAY TO IRAQ.
SHE DOESN'T KNOW
ANYTHING, REALLY.
YOU CAN TRUST THEM.
DON'T.
OH, SHIT.
WHAT?
I THOUGHT PHYLLIS ALREADY BROKE UP WITH HER.
I SO DON'T WANT TO KNOW.
THEY'RE BREAKING UP RIGHT NOW.
HOW DO YOU KNOW?
BODY LANGUAGE.
PHYLLIS, LISTEN, YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME.
I'M GOOD FOR YOU.
I'M RICH, I'M SMART,
I'M GREAT IN BED.
AND I KNOW YOU THINK YOU WANT TO PLAY THE FIELD,
BUT I'M TELLING YOU,
YOU WILL NEVER FIND ANYONE BETTER THAN ME.
ARE YOU OKAY?
MM-HMM. I'M GOOD.
DO YOU SEE ANYBODY HERE YOU LIKE?
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
THIS HAS GOT TO BE THE STRAIGHTEST WEDDING
ON EARTH.
NO LESBIAN'S EVER GOING TO GET LAID HERE.
YEAH, PROBABLY.
SHIT, I NEED A DRINK.
LET'S GO TO THE BAR.
ARE YOU OKAY? YOU'RE ACTING WEIRD.
MM-MM. I'M FINE.
SHANE.
HI.
GUESS WHAT.
WILLY LOVES YOU.
HE SAID THE GIRLS CAN'T STOP TALKING
ABOUT HOW YOU DID THEM,
AND I SAID, "WILLY,
CAN SHANE PLEASE DO HAIR ON THE MOVIE?"
AND GUESS WHAT HE SAID.
WHAT? "YES."
YEAH?
GOOD.
TINA, WHAT DID YOU GET THE BRIDE?
I GOT THE BRIDE FOUR ESPRESSO CUPS.
THAT'S NICE. WHAT ABOUT YOU?
OH, GOD!
THANK GOD, YOU'RE HERE.
WHAT DID I GET THE BRIDE?
YOU GOT THE BRIDE A LIMITED EDITION
KITCHENAID ARTISAN STAND MIXER IN METALLIC CHROME.
NICE GIFT.
IT'S A DREAM APPLIANCE.
I LOVE THAT.
I BROUGHT YOU SOME CAKE. ARE YOU HUNGRY?
I GUESS SO.
HI.
I DON'T LIKE THAT.
I'M SORRY.
LET'S PUT THE GIFT ON THE TABLE.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER. BYE, SHANE.
BYE, JENNY. COME ON.
WHO THE HELL IS THAT? I DON'T KNOW.
JENNY'S DRIVING ME CRAZY.
HI, SHANE. HI, GINA.
DO YOU WANT TO DANCE WITH ME?
YOU KNOW, I REALLY DON'T LIKE TO DANCE.
WHAT, WHAT, WHAT?
MY ASSHOLE BOSS, HE'S OVER THERE.
I HAVE TO TALK TO HIM.
OH, GOD.
PLEASE DANCE WITH ME.
JENNY, YOU KNOW, I--
I WANT REX TO SEE US TOGETHER.
OKAY, HOW ABOUT THIS?
I HAVE TO RUN TO THE BATHROOM.
THAT'S CUTE.
AND I'LL BE BACK IN A FEW MINUTES, OKAY?
OKAY.
SO JUST STAY RIGHT THERE.
JUST STAY PUT. I'LL COME AND FIND YOU.
OKAY. I'LL BE HERE.
GUYS!
ALICE, DON'T.
WHAT?
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU TWO?
THIS IS REALLY STUPID.
WE SHOULD JUST TELL THEM. THEY'RE OUR FRIENDS.
TELL US WHAT?
TASHA'S BEING HELD BACK
BECAUSE SHE'S BEING INVESTIGATED
FOR HOMOSEXUAL CONDUCT.
YOU'RE FUCKING KIDDING ME.
AND SHE HAS TO KEEP A LOW PROFILE,
SO IF YOU COULD JUST LAY OFF THE PDA.
I'M SORRY-- YOU JUST-- YOU SHOULD HAVE SAID SOMETHING.
I'M SO SORRY, TASHA. I HAD NO IDEA.
NO, I'M SORRY.
BE RIGHT BACK.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ANYBODY.
I KNOW. I WASN'T GOING TO, BUT I HAD TO.
YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO SHIT, ALICE.
YOU JUST CAN'T KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!
OKAY, I DON'T DESERVE THAT, ALL RIGHT?
I WAS TRYING TO PROTECT YOU.
YOU DON'T GET IT, DO YOU?
GET WHAT? YOU WERE SITTING THERE SQUIRMING.
ALICE, IT'S MY LIFE.
OKAY, I DETERMINE WHEN AND IF PEOPLE WILL KNOW.
THEY'RE NOT JUST PEOPLE, THEY'RE MY FRIENDS.
YOU CAN TRUST THEM.
IT'S NOT THEM I'M WORRIED ABOUT.
WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
NOTHING.
I'M SORRY.
NOTHING.
I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT THE BIG DEAL IS
IF THEY KNOW.
BECAUSE, ALICE, I DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT,
AND I DON'T WANT TO SIT AROUND
AND LISTEN TO EVERYONE'S OPINIONS ABOUT IT,
AND I DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO FEEL LIKE THEY CAN'T BE THEMSELVES
AROUND ME.
THEY DON'T FEEL THAT WAY, TASH.
BUT, SEE, THIS WHY I DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO COME OUT TONIGHT.
LISTEN,
I'M JUST HAVING A HARD TIME UNDERSTANDING
WHY YOU WANT TO BE PART OF AN INSTITUTION
THAT HATES WHO YOU ARE.
OKAY? I'M STRUGGLING WITH THAT.
BUT I KNOW HOW IMPORTANT THIS IS TO YOU,
AND I KNOW THIS IS EVERYTHING TO YOU.
AND YOU'RE EVERYTHING TO ME,
AND I'M JUST TRYING TO STAND HERE BY YOU.
I KNOW.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY, TOO.
I AM.
I LIKE YOUR POSTERS.
ISN'T IT SAD HOW DOROTHY DANDRIDGE
DIED AT THE AGE OF 42?
OD'D ON ANTI-DEPRESSANTS.
SHE KILLED HERSELF?
WELL, THEY SAY IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.
YOU KNOW, SHE WAS TAKING ALL THESE DIFFERENT MEDICATIONS
FOR A SEVERELY INJURED ANKLE,
BUT WHO KNOWS?
APPARENTLY, SHE WAS REALLY DEPRESSED.
IT'S SO SAD.
I LOVED HER IN CARMEN JONES.
ME TOO.
DUSTY...
EARLIER, WHEN YOU SAID I WAS WITH YOU--
DOESN'T MEAN I WANT ANYTHING.
OH.
LOOK WHO WE RAN INTO.
OH.
HI. I'M SORRY, WE DIDN'T MEAN TO TAKE YOUR SEATS.
IT'S OKAY, IT'S OKAY.
WE'RE ACTUALLY GONNA TAKE OFF.
I'M SORRY.
IT'S OKAY.
CAN I GRAB MY PURSE?
OH, SURE.
ARE YOU SURE?
YEAH, NO, I HAVE TO GET UP EARLY.
THIS ONE OVER HERE CAN'T WAIT TO GET BETWEEN THE SHEETS.
I TOLD HER WE NEEDED
TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH OTHER PEOPLE,
AND, YOU KNOW, SPREAD THE LOVE.
TASHA, I AM SO SORRY. I HAD NO IDEA.
DON'T BE SORRY. YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG.
ALL RIGHT? IT WAS NICE TO SEE YOU GUYS.
IT WAS GOOD TO SEE YOU, TOO.
BYE. BYE.
HONEY, COULD YOU PLEASE GET ME ANOTHER GLASS OF WINE?
YOU BETCHA.
HELP ME.
* THAT I WOULD CRY
* OH, BABY
* OH, BABY, OH
DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE THE ONLY MAN IN MY LIFE?
WELL, SOMEONE WOULD HAVE TO BE.
I'M VERY GLAD IT'S ME.
I HAD THE MOST AMAZING EXPERIENCE TODAY.
THIS WOMAN CAME UP TO ME,
AND SHE SAID THAT MY BOOK SAVED HER LIFE,
AND I THOUGHT,
"I THINK OUR MOVIE
IS GOING TO HAVE AN IMPACT ON PEOPLE."
I KNOW IT IS.
DO YOU?
I KNOW IT IS.
THAT'S SO SWEET, I THINK I MIGHT PUKE.
I THINK IT'S WONDERFUL
THAT A MAN WHO'S SPENT HIS ENTIRE LIFE
PLUNDERING FOR HIS OWN ENRICHMENT
NOW WANTS TO CHANGE THE WORLD THROUGH ART.
IF YOU SEE SHANE, TELL HER I LEFT.
BUT I DON'T KNOW YOUR NAME.
READY TO GO?
YES.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
I ALREADY BROKE UP WITH HER.
DO IT AGAIN, PHYLLIS.
SOME LESBIANS YOU HAVE TO BREAK UP WITH MORE THAN ONCE.
I JUST WANTED TO SAY GOOD NIGHT.
WE'RE ABOUT TO GO ON OUR HONEYMOON.
OH, GOOD, I'M GLAD.
WELL, ENJOY YOURSELF.
THANK YOU.
YOU'RE WELCOME. FOR EVERYTHING.
YOU'RE VERY WELCOME.
SHANE.
GINA.
REX IS OUTSIDE WITH HIS WIFE.
I WANT HIM TO SEE US TOGETHER.
GINA, GO TO THE KITCHEN
AND TELL THEM
WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF CHAMPAGNE.
PRONTO!
MEET ME DOWNSTAIRS. I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU.
WHAT IS IT?
YOU'RE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO COME AND FIND OUT.
DUSTY?
HEY, ARE YOU OKAY?
YOU'RE HAVING A NIGHTMARE.
YOU WERE HAVING A BAD DREAM.
ALL RIGHT?
ARE YOU OKAY?
YOU WERE DEFENDING SOMEONE, RIGHT?
OR MAYBE YOU WERE SET UP.
DID SOMEONE FRAME YOU?
NOBODY FRAMED ME.
I'M SURE WHATEVER IT WAS,
YOU DIDN'T MEAN TO KILL ANYONE.
I HAVEN'T KILLED ANYBODY.
YOU DIDN'T?
IT WAS TAX FRAUD.
OH.
ARE YOU SHANE? WHAT?
THE MRS. ASKED ME
TO GIVE THIS TO YOU RIGHT AWAY.
IT'S THIS WAY.
FOLLOW ME.
IT'S INCREDIBLE
THAT HE'S DECIDED TO FINANCE YOUR MOVIE.
YES. WILLIAM IS SO GRATEFUL TO BE INVOLVED IN THE MOVIE.
HE THINKS THAT IT'S GOING TO REDEEM
ALL THESE VULGAR THINGS THAT HE'S DONE FOR MONEY.
YEAH, IT TOTALLY WILL.
I MEAN, YOU ARE JUST SO AMAZING
FOR SHOWING HIM THE ERROR OF HIS WAYS.
OH, THANK YOU.
WELL, I THINK HE'S A NICE GUY,
AND YOU'LL GET TO KNOW HIM ONCE YOU BECOME MY ASSISTANT.
WHAT?
WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE MY ASSISTANT?
YES! YES!
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
NO, YOU DON'T--
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW
HOW MUCH I WANT TO BE YOUR ASSISTANT.
DO YOU? YES.
OH, YES! THANK YOU SO MUCH.
I'M GOING TO WORK SO HARD FOR YOU.
YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BE SORRY.
OH, MY GOD, I'M SO EXCITED.
CAREFUL OF THE DRESS.
DRINK?
YEAH.
I THINK I'D BETTER.
THANK YOU.
SO, SHANE.
YES, MA'AM?
DON'T BE COY WITH ME, SHANE.
I SAW THE WAY YOU LOOKED AT ME WHEN YOU FOLLOWED ME.
YOU DID?
YES, I DID.
AND IT MADE ME HORNY.
I'M NOT CRAZY, AM I, SHANE?
NO, NO, NO, NO, I DON'T THINK SO.
GOOD.
YOU KNOW, SHANE,
I'M GOING TO LET YOU IN ON A LITTLE SECRET.
THERE'S NOT A LOT I HAVEN'T EXPERIENCED.
I CAN GO ANYWHERE I WANT,
BUY ANYTHING I WANT,
AND IT'S STARTING TO WEAR A LITTLE BIT THIN.
MRS. HALSEY, I--
I WANT YOU TO TAKE ME SOMEWHERE I'VE NEVER BEEN.
I DON'T-- I DON'T KNOW IF I COULD.
YEAH.
YOU COULD.
AND YOU WILL.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING? NOTHING.
[MOANING]
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
YEAH, WHAT IS THAT?
MOTHER!
SHANE!
GET AWAY FROM HER, YOU COW! SHE'S MINE!
YOURS?
SHANE, TELL THEM ABOUT US.
WHAT?
SHANE NEEDS A WOMAN
WHO CAN TAKE HER PLACES SHE'S NEVER BEEN BEFORE,
NOT SOME LITTLE TWERP
WHO BARELY KNOWS HOW TO TONGUE KISS.
WHAT TILL DADDY FINDS OUT.
DADDY WILL NOT FIND OUT!
YOU'RE TOO OLD FOR HER!
OH, MY GOD! COME BACK HERE.
SHANE!
WAIT! COME HERE!
THEY'RE CRAZY, SHANE!
EXCUSE ME. SORRY, EXCUSE ME.
SORRY, SORRY, SORRY. EXCUSE ME.
SHANE!
THEY'RE CRAZY, SHANE!
STOP HER!
JENNY!
DRIVE, DRIVE, DRIVE!
SHANE!
* YOU COULD NOT KEEP YOUR PRETTY HANDS OFF ME *
* YOU SHATTERED MY IMAGE OF LOVE *
* WHILE I WAS NAKED IN THE TUB
* YOU SHATTERED MY IMAGE OF LOVE *
* SO WHEN I BIT IT WAS FOR BLOOD *
* YOU COULD NOT KEEP YOUR PRETTY HANDS OFF ME *
* YOU COULD NOT KEEP YOUR PRETTY HANDS OFF ME... *