1 00:00:58,876 --> 00:01:01,538 I loved my mother so much. 2 00:01:02,713 --> 00:01:05,546 She was a drug addict. 3 00:01:06,850 --> 00:01:08,716 She was an alcoholic. 4 00:01:10,187 --> 00:01:12,383 She was legally blind. 5 00:01:12,890 --> 00:01:15,154 She was a schizophrenic. 6 00:01:16,393 --> 00:01:19,226 But I never forgot that she loved me. 7 00:01:19,563 --> 00:01:20,928 Even if she did. 8 00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:23,998 All the time. 9 00:01:26,337 --> 00:01:28,362 All the time. 10 00:01:30,741 --> 00:01:32,209 All the time. 11 00:01:45,989 --> 00:01:48,048 Lisa, give me the money. 12 00:01:49,093 --> 00:01:50,857 It's mine. 13 00:01:51,295 --> 00:01:53,423 God, it's mine. The state gives it to me. 14 00:01:53,597 --> 00:01:56,089 -Who is Sam Donaldson? -Who is Sam Donaldson? 15 00:01:56,600 --> 00:01:59,297 You frigging bitch! Your kids are not eating. 16 00:01:59,470 --> 00:02:02,201 -Where's your heart? -Amoeba. What is amoeba? 17 00:02:02,373 --> 00:02:04,000 -What is amoeba? -Where is it? 18 00:02:04,174 --> 00:02:07,610 -You're in the lead all by yourself. -Lisa, give it to me. 19 00:02:07,778 --> 00:02:11,146 Because there are no blood vessels in this layer of skin... 20 00:02:11,315 --> 00:02:14,376 -...nutrition is supplied by a tissue-- -What is epidermis? 21 00:02:14,551 --> 00:02:16,485 -What is the epidermis? -Correct. 22 00:02:16,820 --> 00:02:18,652 I gave it to you. 23 00:02:18,889 --> 00:02:20,254 Let go, Mom! 24 00:02:21,258 --> 00:02:22,953 I gave 100 to you. 25 00:02:24,161 --> 00:02:27,131 When my checks came in, I gave 100 to you, to one of you. 26 00:02:27,931 --> 00:02:32,425 -To hold. One of you. -No, for us to live on! 27 00:02:34,271 --> 00:02:37,764 -Every month, it's the same damn thing! -What is genus? 28 00:02:37,941 --> 00:02:40,433 So you can put it in your arm. So we can starve. 29 00:02:41,111 --> 00:02:42,806 It's mine. 30 00:02:42,980 --> 00:02:46,575 -I didn't take it. -Give it to me! 31 00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:50,076 The Oldenburg dynasty, founded by King Christian I... 32 00:02:50,521 --> 00:02:53,752 -...ruled this country from 1448 to 1863. -What is Denmark? 33 00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:55,153 Give it to me. 34 00:02:55,325 --> 00:02:57,293 It's mine! 35 00:02:57,694 --> 00:02:59,093 It's mine. 36 00:03:00,998 --> 00:03:04,491 -We're hungry! -l can't! We need food, Mommy. 37 00:03:04,668 --> 00:03:08,127 What the hell did you ever do for me, huh? I gave you life. 38 00:03:09,339 --> 00:03:12,639 Do you want me to go out in the street and sell myself for it? 39 00:03:12,810 --> 00:03:14,175 Do you want me to do that? 40 00:03:14,344 --> 00:03:17,837 -You know I do that sometimes, right? -Jeanie, what are you saying? 41 00:03:18,015 --> 00:03:20,177 -She doesn't need to hear that. -Oh, God! 42 00:03:23,487 --> 00:03:25,046 Theater for 400. 43 00:03:25,222 --> 00:03:27,714 Type of theatrical makeup whose name is found... 44 00:03:27,891 --> 00:03:30,622 ...in the title of an Anthony Newley musical. 45 00:03:31,161 --> 00:03:33,562 -Mark. -What is greasepaint? 46 00:03:34,465 --> 00:03:35,694 I need it. 47 00:03:35,866 --> 00:03:40,064 Specific term for someone who claims to be pope when there already is one. 48 00:03:40,237 --> 00:03:42,365 -l need it. -Antipope. 49 00:03:42,539 --> 00:03:44,940 That's right. And our last clue for 1000. 50 00:03:45,108 --> 00:03:47,475 I need it. 51 00:03:48,178 --> 00:03:50,078 --considered Islam's second holiest. 52 00:03:50,247 --> 00:03:52,341 -What is Medina? -What is Medina? 53 00:03:52,516 --> 00:03:57,477 That gives you $15,200 at the end of the Double JEOPARDY! round. 54 00:03:57,654 --> 00:03:59,645 But Mark, very impressive also. 55 00:04:00,457 --> 00:04:02,050 -Theater for 800. -Answer: 56 00:04:02,226 --> 00:04:06,595 This director died just hours before the opening of his last musical, 42nd Street. 57 00:04:06,763 --> 00:04:08,959 -Who is Gower Champion? -Who is Bob Fosse? 58 00:04:09,132 --> 00:04:11,226 -No. Phil. -Who is Gower Champion? 59 00:04:11,401 --> 00:04:12,664 Correct. 60 00:04:13,136 --> 00:04:14,900 I wanted that smile. 61 00:04:15,706 --> 00:04:19,609 Oh, God, I wanted that smile so much. 62 00:04:21,144 --> 00:04:23,408 I was pathetic, wasn't I? 63 00:04:27,017 --> 00:04:29,247 -Mark. -What is Yugoslavia? 64 00:04:29,419 --> 00:04:32,116 -Biology for 1000. -Don't take the Aqueduct! 65 00:04:32,289 --> 00:04:36,556 Giving two scientific names to all living organisms was devised by this Swedish-- 66 00:04:36,727 --> 00:04:38,525 -Daddy! -Who is Carl Linnaeus? 67 00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:40,686 -Who is Linnaeus? -Correct. 68 00:04:40,864 --> 00:04:43,458 Rudolfs and Rudolphs for 200. 69 00:04:43,634 --> 00:04:45,261 She's taking the Aqueduct! 70 00:04:45,435 --> 00:04:47,028 What difference does it make? 71 00:04:47,204 --> 00:04:48,831 -She'll get mugged! -Who cares? 72 00:04:51,408 --> 00:04:52,739 Who is Rudolph Valentino? 73 00:04:52,910 --> 00:04:57,609 -Daddy, she can't see, she'll get mugged. -Always a big production. 74 00:04:57,781 --> 00:04:59,943 The characters in his play Hay Fever... 75 00:05:00,117 --> 00:05:03,246 -...were inspired by actress Laurette-- -Who is Noel Coward? 76 00:05:04,221 --> 00:05:06,121 -Who is Noel Coward? -Good for 1000. 77 00:05:06,290 --> 00:05:09,920 -l see they fixed the lights. -The muggers will break them again. 78 00:05:10,227 --> 00:05:11,991 No, no. 79 00:05:12,162 --> 00:05:15,291 No, you see, she's okay. See, water runs downhill. 80 00:05:16,667 --> 00:05:17,998 There's no water. 81 00:05:18,168 --> 00:05:20,603 No, no. Don't you know what the aqueduct is? 82 00:05:20,904 --> 00:05:23,737 The aqueduct carried water to New York City. 83 00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:26,239 For over 100 years, it did that... 84 00:05:26,410 --> 00:05:30,210 ...and then they closed it down. But now, the ghost water, right? 85 00:05:30,380 --> 00:05:32,815 It carries your mother along. 86 00:05:34,551 --> 00:05:36,451 -My father. -Hey, Jerry. 87 00:05:36,620 --> 00:05:39,590 You could sit down on the couch and talk to my father. 88 00:05:39,756 --> 00:05:42,623 -You just couldn't talk to him for long. -Hey, Jean! 89 00:05:45,295 --> 00:05:49,630 He knew so much. He got all the answers right on JEOPARDY! 90 00:05:49,800 --> 00:05:53,668 He was a genius. Every answer, every time. 91 00:05:59,710 --> 00:06:01,041 Watch where you're going! 92 00:06:06,917 --> 00:06:08,942 That's the thing. 93 00:06:09,353 --> 00:06:11,754 Your parents are your gods. 94 00:06:11,922 --> 00:06:16,689 I looked at them as an example of what I should find everywhere in the world. 95 00:06:17,194 --> 00:06:21,131 They paid so little attention to my needs. 96 00:06:21,298 --> 00:06:24,632 But then it felt like their need was so powerful... 97 00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:29,967 ...that it didn't make me feel hurt or angry that they didn't look into me... 98 00:06:32,442 --> 00:06:37,505 ...because I felt, "Okay, this just must be the human condition to be so." 99 00:06:47,124 --> 00:06:49,354 And then the world came in. 100 00:06:56,233 --> 00:06:59,203 You took my husband, Elizabeth. I'm going to kill you. 101 00:06:59,369 --> 00:07:01,497 -No, Mommy. -I'm not your mother. 102 00:07:01,672 --> 00:07:03,367 I did you a favor. 103 00:07:03,540 --> 00:07:05,440 You shouldn't have tread on me. 104 00:07:05,609 --> 00:07:08,840 Help me clean up. If they see this, they're gonna take us too. 105 00:07:10,747 --> 00:07:12,841 -No! No! -Come on, Jeanie. 106 00:07:13,016 --> 00:07:14,245 Get out of my house. 107 00:07:14,418 --> 00:07:17,217 No! You're not taking me. Get out. No, no, no. 108 00:07:17,754 --> 00:07:20,348 -Don't take me. I'm onto you. -No fuss now. 109 00:07:20,524 --> 00:07:22,720 -What happened to the window? -She threw the cat out. 110 00:07:22,993 --> 00:07:26,293 I'll set you on fire before you take me. 111 00:07:26,463 --> 00:07:29,626 -Take her hands now. -Leave me alone. Leave me alone. 112 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:31,290 -Come on. -Leave me alone! 113 00:07:31,768 --> 00:07:33,702 Why don't you take your medication? 114 00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:37,807 Oh, she takes it. She just takes too many other things on top of it. 115 00:07:38,475 --> 00:07:41,308 Okay, hit her with it right now. Let's get her down. 116 00:07:43,213 --> 00:07:45,875 -This place is a mess. -What happened here? 117 00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:47,710 I fell down. 118 00:07:47,884 --> 00:07:50,785 -She's got a knife! -Jeanie, put the knife down. 119 00:07:52,556 --> 00:07:54,081 Okay, okay. 120 00:08:01,331 --> 00:08:03,322 -Where's the phone? -We don't have one. 121 00:08:03,500 --> 00:08:05,628 -This woman is unfit. -No kidding. 122 00:08:05,802 --> 00:08:09,238 You girls have a choice. Clean this place up. Help your mother. 123 00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:12,740 -How about my father? -Oh, ignore her, she's a feminist. 124 00:08:12,909 --> 00:08:15,810 -l can take you any time I want. -Lisa! Lisa! 125 00:08:15,979 --> 00:08:19,074 You keep skipping school and living like filthy animals. 126 00:08:19,382 --> 00:08:22,374 -Lizzie. Lizzie. -Hey, hey. Where are you going? 127 00:08:22,552 --> 00:08:24,020 Come back here! Come back! 128 00:08:24,187 --> 00:08:27,248 You're going to a home. You know what those homes are like. 129 00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:30,951 Girls in there will beat you down, take everything you've got. 130 00:08:31,128 --> 00:08:32,391 You can't have anything. 131 00:08:32,562 --> 00:08:36,829 You'll have to clean bathrooms. You'll work there if you don't work here. 132 00:08:43,507 --> 00:08:45,908 Back off. Back off! 133 00:08:46,076 --> 00:08:47,635 It's not a show. 134 00:08:47,844 --> 00:08:50,472 Got nothing better to do, huh? 135 00:08:52,415 --> 00:08:54,042 Mommy? 136 00:08:56,386 --> 00:08:57,945 Mommy? 137 00:09:02,692 --> 00:09:04,023 Couldn't they see? 138 00:09:04,361 --> 00:09:07,422 Anyone could see. She was in so much pain... 139 00:09:07,931 --> 00:09:10,992 ...and her struggle was so much on the surface, so there... 140 00:09:11,168 --> 00:09:12,602 ...if anyone cared to look. 141 00:09:12,969 --> 00:09:15,995 She wasn't running off, being a mother to somebody else. 142 00:09:16,173 --> 00:09:18,437 She just didn't have any more to give. 143 00:09:18,608 --> 00:09:22,044 Mommy! Let me go! 144 00:09:23,780 --> 00:09:26,442 No! No! No! 145 00:09:56,713 --> 00:09:58,772 All right, hey, hey, hey. 146 00:09:59,816 --> 00:10:02,285 -Something stinks. -What is that? 147 00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:08,552 I was always the smelly kid in class. 148 00:10:08,725 --> 00:10:11,592 Lisa stood on the bucket to shower, but Daddy laughed... 149 00:10:11,761 --> 00:10:15,493 ...and said she'd have to marry a doctor, she had so many expectations. 150 00:10:15,665 --> 00:10:21,104 I didn't have any expectations, and so therefore, I guess, I stunk. 151 00:10:23,406 --> 00:10:25,374 And I itched from lice. 152 00:10:25,542 --> 00:10:27,909 And it burned between my legs. 153 00:10:28,078 --> 00:10:31,048 My teachers were always telling me not to fidget... 154 00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:33,308 ...but my underwear-- 155 00:10:33,984 --> 00:10:38,387 I didn't know what to do about underwear. I just wore it until it fell apart. 156 00:10:38,555 --> 00:10:41,286 All right. People. 157 00:10:41,458 --> 00:10:44,758 Thank you. Recess is over. 158 00:10:47,397 --> 00:10:48,956 My teeth ached. 159 00:10:49,132 --> 00:10:50,600 I was hungry. 160 00:10:50,767 --> 00:10:52,792 Settle! Thank you. 161 00:10:52,969 --> 00:10:55,597 The teacher's words never seemed to reach me. 162 00:10:55,772 --> 00:11:00,300 Words just seemed to fall on the floor. 163 00:11:00,944 --> 00:11:03,811 -Give me the test. No point taking that. -I'll take it. 164 00:11:04,047 --> 00:11:08,507 -You've been here three times this month. -I'll take it. It doesn't look that hard. 165 00:11:23,300 --> 00:11:25,894 Oh, Liz. Stay here. 166 00:11:29,572 --> 00:11:31,301 You do smell, you know? 167 00:11:31,474 --> 00:11:33,704 -Doesn't your mother tell you--? -No, no. 168 00:11:33,877 --> 00:11:36,369 No, it's my fault. I just forget. 169 00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:42,078 Okay. Well, when you're having a shower tonight, you want to wash back here? 170 00:11:43,486 --> 00:11:45,545 I've been saving some things for you. 171 00:11:52,729 --> 00:11:54,163 Here. 172 00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:59,898 And here. How did you do that? 173 00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:01,995 You're never in school. 174 00:12:04,841 --> 00:12:07,538 -l read a lot. -Yeah? What do you read? 175 00:12:08,111 --> 00:12:10,307 The encyclopedia. 176 00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:14,974 The lady upstairs, Eva, she found one in the dumpster. 177 00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:18,883 The whole set. Well, except for R to S. 178 00:12:19,189 --> 00:12:22,318 If you had asked about R to S, I would have gotten it wrong. 179 00:12:22,759 --> 00:12:24,056 I was just lucky. 180 00:12:24,227 --> 00:12:26,924 -Oh, Liz, you have to come to school. -Okay. 181 00:12:27,097 --> 00:12:30,328 I mean it. It's ridiculous. You're too smart not to be here. 182 00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:34,334 -I don't understand why you don't come. -I will. 183 00:12:35,438 --> 00:12:38,897 How could I tell her that school made me sad? 184 00:12:39,075 --> 00:12:42,875 I didn't know how to talk to her. I didn't know how to talk to anyone. 185 00:12:43,046 --> 00:12:46,175 My house wasn't a place you could come out of and be normal. 186 00:12:46,349 --> 00:12:48,716 Well, you have to come every day, okay? 187 00:12:48,885 --> 00:12:51,877 If you don't, then I have to call child welfare. 188 00:12:52,055 --> 00:12:55,514 And that's not a threat, it's a promise. 189 00:13:07,237 --> 00:13:08,864 Eva! 190 00:13:09,039 --> 00:13:10,302 Look what I got. 191 00:13:10,473 --> 00:13:13,101 -A hundred? -Because of your encyclopedia. 192 00:13:13,276 --> 00:13:15,904 Good. You gotta make good marks. 193 00:13:16,079 --> 00:13:18,047 You don't want to be an idiot. 194 00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:20,581 And you keep it up now, you hear me? 195 00:13:20,750 --> 00:13:22,878 Now, your mother's back. 196 00:13:23,787 --> 00:13:25,312 My mother's back? 197 00:13:25,488 --> 00:13:28,947 Well, we had a nice, quiet couple of months. 198 00:13:29,125 --> 00:13:30,752 Didn't we? 199 00:13:31,394 --> 00:13:34,591 The good thing about my mother being taken to the nuthouse... 200 00:13:34,764 --> 00:13:37,529 ...was that when she came back, she was my mom again. 201 00:13:37,700 --> 00:13:39,327 She cooked and she cleaned. 202 00:13:39,502 --> 00:13:42,733 Once, she even tried to learn how to be a court stenographer. 203 00:13:42,906 --> 00:13:46,308 For me, that was the good, quiet couple of months... 204 00:13:46,476 --> 00:13:48,103 ...before the drugs came back. 205 00:13:49,479 --> 00:13:51,004 Mommy? 206 00:13:56,219 --> 00:13:57,744 Mommy? 207 00:14:12,402 --> 00:14:13,699 Mommy? 208 00:14:13,870 --> 00:14:15,360 Lizzie. 209 00:14:22,412 --> 00:14:24,141 Are you okay? 210 00:14:24,314 --> 00:14:26,214 I'm okay. 211 00:14:28,017 --> 00:14:31,419 Pumpkin, you look real good. 212 00:14:31,988 --> 00:14:34,252 I'm glad you're home, Mommy. 213 00:14:37,327 --> 00:14:39,352 Aren't you glad you're home? 214 00:14:40,063 --> 00:14:42,998 Well, this hospital... 215 00:14:44,033 --> 00:14:46,058 ...wasn't too bad. 216 00:14:46,503 --> 00:14:48,232 It's too green. 217 00:14:48,404 --> 00:14:49,997 The walls. 218 00:14:50,573 --> 00:14:53,804 And there were bars on the windows. 219 00:14:53,977 --> 00:14:58,380 I'm sorry you had to see that, you know. 220 00:14:59,182 --> 00:15:01,048 I'm used to it. 221 00:15:01,217 --> 00:15:03,413 But now I'm glad you're home. 222 00:15:10,793 --> 00:15:12,420 Look. 223 00:15:13,396 --> 00:15:16,058 Look, I got 100. 224 00:15:19,702 --> 00:15:22,103 No, no, 100 is good. 225 00:15:22,438 --> 00:15:24,167 A hundred is perfect. 226 00:15:24,674 --> 00:15:27,041 Didn't you ever get 100? 227 00:15:31,314 --> 00:15:33,510 I didn't go to school. 228 00:15:34,617 --> 00:15:36,915 I ran away too young. 229 00:15:37,153 --> 00:15:39,144 Don't you ever run away... 230 00:15:39,322 --> 00:15:41,086 ...from home. 231 00:15:41,291 --> 00:15:42,986 I won't. 232 00:15:48,164 --> 00:15:51,361 Liz, I'll always be here for you. 233 00:15:53,069 --> 00:15:54,559 I know, Mommy. 234 00:15:56,039 --> 00:15:58,133 I'll always be here. 235 00:15:58,441 --> 00:15:59,499 Always. 236 00:16:01,611 --> 00:16:03,579 I know, Mommy. 237 00:16:07,383 --> 00:16:09,249 I'm sick. 238 00:16:10,353 --> 00:16:13,084 I'm sick. I'm sick. 239 00:16:14,190 --> 00:16:15,885 Liz, I-- 240 00:16:16,559 --> 00:16:17,890 I have AIDS. 241 00:16:23,366 --> 00:16:24,697 No, no, no. 242 00:16:24,867 --> 00:16:26,096 Baby, don't. 243 00:16:26,669 --> 00:16:28,159 They say-- 244 00:16:28,338 --> 00:16:31,273 Don't be afraid. They say I-- 245 00:16:31,441 --> 00:16:34,968 I might-- I could-- They say I could live forever, okay? 246 00:16:36,346 --> 00:16:38,508 But I can't live here. 247 00:16:40,717 --> 00:16:41,946 I'm going to go home. 248 00:16:42,819 --> 00:16:44,184 This is home. 249 00:16:44,354 --> 00:16:47,415 No, home to my pops. I'll take you and Lisa out of here. 250 00:16:47,590 --> 00:16:50,116 No, no, you have to stay here. 251 00:16:50,293 --> 00:16:52,694 I gotta stop the drugs. 252 00:16:53,529 --> 00:16:55,691 And I can't do it with Daddy around. 253 00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:59,059 But he'll be alone. 254 00:17:01,838 --> 00:17:05,900 Lisa's already gone over. Just pack up your things, and let's go. 255 00:17:06,075 --> 00:17:08,874 No, because you said Pops beat you. 256 00:17:09,045 --> 00:17:10,740 You said he raped your sister. 257 00:17:10,913 --> 00:17:14,645 -This is the way it has to be now. -No. Stay here. 258 00:17:16,919 --> 00:17:18,148 I can't. 259 00:17:19,055 --> 00:17:20,352 Stay, Mommy. 260 00:17:20,823 --> 00:17:23,190 Everything was falling apart. 261 00:17:23,359 --> 00:17:26,021 I thought if I stayed, I could stop it. 262 00:17:26,195 --> 00:17:30,826 I thought if I stayed, everything would somehow stay the same. 263 00:17:50,620 --> 00:17:52,349 Just open the door. 264 00:17:52,522 --> 00:17:55,981 It's no use. I know you're in there. 265 00:18:10,940 --> 00:18:13,375 -Where's your mother and sister? -They're gone. 266 00:18:14,110 --> 00:18:15,635 Where's your father? 267 00:18:15,812 --> 00:18:18,611 He's gone to get some food. He'll be right back. 268 00:18:21,718 --> 00:18:25,120 Your teacher called. You're still not going to school. 269 00:18:25,288 --> 00:18:27,154 You're never in school. 270 00:18:27,323 --> 00:18:29,792 We've got to do something about this. 271 00:18:30,093 --> 00:18:33,961 Miss Wanda warned you. I warned you. Your caseworkers have warned you. 272 00:18:34,130 --> 00:18:35,928 This has been going on for years. 273 00:18:36,099 --> 00:18:39,262 We all said, "Clean up this place and go to school. 274 00:18:39,435 --> 00:18:40,766 Clean up. Go to school.” 275 00:18:41,137 --> 00:18:43,606 You haven't done either one of them, have you? 276 00:18:43,773 --> 00:18:45,673 Elizabeth, have you? 277 00:18:45,842 --> 00:18:48,311 -No. -So, what are we going to do? 278 00:18:49,312 --> 00:18:51,576 -I don't know. -I do. 279 00:18:52,148 --> 00:18:54,116 You're going into the system. 280 00:18:54,851 --> 00:18:56,580 I'm taking her. 281 00:18:57,286 --> 00:19:00,483 Things are better. My daddy buys me baked potatoes every day. 282 00:19:01,124 --> 00:19:03,889 You're not paying rent, not getting her to school. 283 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:05,789 I tell her to go. I told you to. 284 00:19:05,962 --> 00:19:08,693 She's got a mind of her own. She's a feminist. 285 00:19:08,865 --> 00:19:10,890 This is not a joking matter. 286 00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:12,967 Pack her a suitcase. 287 00:19:13,269 --> 00:19:14,828 Now. 288 00:19:15,838 --> 00:19:18,569 -No! No! -I'm sorry. 289 00:19:19,041 --> 00:19:21,976 -I'll go to school. Please. -This isn't working. 290 00:19:22,145 --> 00:19:23,806 We need a responsible adult. 291 00:19:23,980 --> 00:19:27,712 My grandpop's responsible. He'll take me. My sister's there. 292 00:19:27,884 --> 00:19:29,318 Your sister goes to school. 293 00:19:29,485 --> 00:19:32,614 I'll go to school. Please. 294 00:19:32,789 --> 00:19:34,985 Don't make a fuss. 295 00:19:35,458 --> 00:19:37,017 I'll talk to him. 296 00:19:37,193 --> 00:19:40,254 And if he'll take you, you'll be out in 24 hours. 297 00:19:41,464 --> 00:19:42,522 I'm sorry. 298 00:19:44,667 --> 00:19:46,567 And if he won't? 299 00:19:50,339 --> 00:19:53,570 You'll have time to figure out how you want to live your life. 300 00:20:26,876 --> 00:20:29,436 Figure out my life. 301 00:20:30,012 --> 00:20:32,344 Did people really do that? 302 00:20:32,582 --> 00:20:36,485 Do they do that while they're falling down a deep, dark hole? 303 00:20:49,031 --> 00:20:52,001 Buzzed in, locked in. 304 00:20:52,168 --> 00:20:56,571 It was like visiting my mother, only I was in the crazy house now. 305 00:21:08,150 --> 00:21:10,847 -Get in here! -Get her! Get her! 306 00:21:34,610 --> 00:21:37,045 -Hey! -Oh, no, you didn't. 307 00:21:37,213 --> 00:21:39,944 And I didn't get out in 24 hours. 308 00:21:40,116 --> 00:21:42,210 I didn't get out in 24 days. 309 00:21:42,385 --> 00:21:44,012 No one wanted me. 310 00:21:44,186 --> 00:21:46,211 They just left me there. 311 00:21:47,123 --> 00:21:48,613 What are you gonna do? 312 00:21:52,828 --> 00:21:54,592 Sick! 313 00:21:57,567 --> 00:21:59,001 Why don't you go to school? 314 00:21:59,936 --> 00:22:02,337 That's the big problem we've got here. 315 00:22:02,505 --> 00:22:04,405 Why don't you go? 316 00:22:15,484 --> 00:22:17,714 From what I can see... 317 00:22:17,887 --> 00:22:19,753 ...you've got a discipline problem. 318 00:23:44,073 --> 00:23:45,871 -Liz? -Hi, Pops. 319 00:23:46,042 --> 00:23:50,172 Let me get your mother. Jeanie. Come out here. 320 00:23:50,346 --> 00:23:52,178 She's here. 321 00:23:57,420 --> 00:23:59,980 I'm late for school, but I wanted to see you. 322 00:24:00,156 --> 00:24:02,488 -Thanks, Lisa. -Don't screw this up. 323 00:24:02,658 --> 00:24:06,652 We're doing okay. And don't expect too much. 324 00:24:06,829 --> 00:24:08,524 She's dying. 325 00:24:20,776 --> 00:24:22,403 Oh, God! 326 00:24:34,356 --> 00:24:38,725 When I think of my life, this is the time I like to think of-- 327 00:24:39,095 --> 00:24:42,531 When I got back, when my mother's mind was clear. 328 00:24:42,698 --> 00:24:46,635 There was no cocaine, so her schizophrenia medicine kept on working. 329 00:24:46,802 --> 00:24:51,968 And we'd go to the café and sit and talk and eat hamburgers. 330 00:24:52,608 --> 00:24:54,076 We were together. 331 00:24:54,243 --> 00:24:57,645 Even with her bad eyes, I think she could see me. 332 00:24:57,813 --> 00:24:59,907 Well, she could see my outline. 333 00:25:00,082 --> 00:25:02,517 And for a while, I had my mother again. 334 00:25:02,685 --> 00:25:07,054 In Wood Park. Yeah, I remember. We used to slide down that hill, remember? 335 00:25:07,223 --> 00:25:10,716 You'd put down that old cardboard, and we'd pretend it was a sled. 336 00:25:11,494 --> 00:25:12,825 You remember that? 337 00:25:13,095 --> 00:25:15,359 How about the tickle monster? 338 00:25:15,631 --> 00:25:18,430 Well, we screamed and laughed about that one. 339 00:25:18,934 --> 00:25:21,130 I was a good mom, wasn't I? 340 00:25:25,040 --> 00:25:26,269 Wasn't I? 341 00:25:26,442 --> 00:25:29,878 -I mean-- -Yeah, Mom. You were fine. 342 00:25:30,112 --> 00:25:31,671 Yeah. 343 00:25:33,516 --> 00:25:36,850 Well, I'm real glad we're all together, you know? 344 00:25:37,019 --> 00:25:40,045 You and me and Lisa. 345 00:25:40,222 --> 00:25:42,623 If Dad went off drugs, wouldn't that be great? 346 00:25:42,892 --> 00:25:45,725 Maybe we could even go back to University Avenue. 347 00:25:51,700 --> 00:25:53,794 Your dad... 348 00:25:53,969 --> 00:25:56,495 ...he's in a shelter right now. 349 00:25:56,672 --> 00:25:59,107 He-- I'm afraid he lost the apartment. 350 00:25:59,275 --> 00:26:02,677 He kind of ignored the rent, so, you know. 351 00:26:05,080 --> 00:26:06,343 What about my stuff? 352 00:26:07,783 --> 00:26:09,251 It all got thrown out. 353 00:26:09,585 --> 00:26:12,282 All of it? Even my encyclopedias? 354 00:26:12,454 --> 00:26:15,321 Look, pumpkin, I'm real sorry, you know. 355 00:26:15,491 --> 00:26:17,391 They boarded up the whole place. 356 00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:20,791 There was nothing-- There was nothing we could do. 357 00:26:20,963 --> 00:26:23,159 Crap happens. I mean-- 358 00:26:23,632 --> 00:26:27,535 Look, you know, I got to go around the corner and see a few friends. 359 00:26:27,703 --> 00:26:30,866 Just for a minute, okay? You finish your burger... 360 00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:35,102 ...and I'll be right back. Just be a minute. 361 00:26:35,277 --> 00:26:37,177 Just be a minute, baby. 362 00:27:40,476 --> 00:27:41,875 So that was that. 363 00:27:42,044 --> 00:27:44,035 No going back. 364 00:27:44,213 --> 00:27:46,682 I hadn't kept anything together. 365 00:27:46,849 --> 00:27:49,250 I had only made things worse. 366 00:27:49,485 --> 00:27:52,614 If I'd only gone to school, if I'd only.... 367 00:27:52,788 --> 00:27:54,654 If I'd only. 368 00:27:55,057 --> 00:27:58,083 So that part of my life was over. 369 00:27:58,260 --> 00:28:00,820 I guess the new part had begun. 370 00:28:05,701 --> 00:28:07,294 Elizabeth Murray? 371 00:28:07,469 --> 00:28:10,029 -And you're her mother? -Yeah. 372 00:28:10,339 --> 00:28:13,331 I'll take you to your class now. 373 00:28:14,310 --> 00:28:16,642 I'll take this. Okay? 374 00:28:16,812 --> 00:28:19,338 Bye, Mom. Are you going to get home okay? 375 00:28:19,515 --> 00:28:23,179 I'm just going to go down and see my buddies. They'll take care of me. 376 00:28:23,352 --> 00:28:25,912 -I should come with you. -No, stay in school. 377 00:28:26,088 --> 00:28:28,921 Otherwise, they'll take you away again. Go, go, go. 378 00:28:39,635 --> 00:28:43,401 So we have nouns, verbs. Chris. 379 00:28:44,974 --> 00:28:47,170 Adjectives and prepositions. 380 00:28:47,443 --> 00:28:51,107 Who's that? Do you know who that is? 381 00:28:56,952 --> 00:28:58,886 I wasn't the smelly kid anymore. 382 00:28:59,455 --> 00:29:02,516 I'd learned to shower every day at the group home. 383 00:29:02,691 --> 00:29:06,594 And my clothes, even if they came from the thrift shop, all fit. 384 00:29:06,762 --> 00:29:09,857 But I still didn't know how to be in school. 385 00:29:10,032 --> 00:29:12,000 I still didn't know how to be normal. 386 00:29:12,167 --> 00:29:14,295 You know what I'm saying? 387 00:29:14,803 --> 00:29:16,396 Can we try to settle down? 388 00:29:17,373 --> 00:29:20,365 Chris, would you like to try diagram number 12? 389 00:29:20,542 --> 00:29:21,532 No. 390 00:29:22,945 --> 00:29:24,674 Bobby? 391 00:29:33,956 --> 00:29:36,482 You find him amusing, miss-- 392 00:29:36,658 --> 00:29:39,150 -Elizabeth? -Please don't call me that. 393 00:29:39,661 --> 00:29:42,631 That's your name, according to these forms. 394 00:29:43,565 --> 00:29:45,397 Liz. Or Lizzie. 395 00:29:46,402 --> 00:29:48,393 Liz or Lizzie is a nickname. 396 00:29:50,506 --> 00:29:52,497 Are nicknames. 397 00:29:52,674 --> 00:29:56,941 -No, I'm afraid not. -Call the girl what she wants to be called. 398 00:29:57,112 --> 00:29:59,809 Elizabeth is a fine name. It's the name of a queen. 399 00:29:59,982 --> 00:30:04,510 The Elizabethan age was the age of Shakespeare. What's your problem with it? 400 00:30:06,055 --> 00:30:08,820 My mother calls me Elizabeth when she's going insane. 401 00:30:11,760 --> 00:30:14,161 Wow, I don't want to know that. 402 00:30:15,931 --> 00:30:17,365 Liz, then. 403 00:30:17,533 --> 00:30:19,900 Bobby, the sentence? 404 00:30:22,137 --> 00:30:24,970 So where'd you go to school before this? 405 00:30:25,140 --> 00:30:26,733 I didn't. 406 00:30:27,342 --> 00:30:29,367 How'd you pull that off? 407 00:30:29,578 --> 00:30:31,637 I was in a group home. 408 00:30:31,847 --> 00:30:33,281 Was that freaky? 409 00:30:35,584 --> 00:30:38,076 -Yeah. -But you're not a freak? 410 00:30:39,221 --> 00:30:40,450 No. 411 00:30:42,458 --> 00:30:44,153 That's too bad. 412 00:30:44,393 --> 00:30:46,020 I am. 413 00:30:47,830 --> 00:30:49,628 -My birthday's coming up. -Yeah? 414 00:30:50,599 --> 00:30:52,624 -When? -Oh, you'll know. 415 00:30:52,801 --> 00:30:55,566 I'm going to wear my dad's trench coat. 416 00:30:55,737 --> 00:30:59,139 I'm going to come to school with nothing on but my trench coat... 417 00:30:59,308 --> 00:31:00,935 ...and a pair of boots. 418 00:31:02,211 --> 00:31:04,646 I'm going to flash all the teachers. 419 00:31:05,314 --> 00:31:06,679 Happy birthday. 420 00:31:10,385 --> 00:31:12,285 You don't believe me? 421 00:31:14,223 --> 00:31:15,987 Yeah, I do. 422 00:31:16,558 --> 00:31:17,787 No, you don't. 423 00:31:23,332 --> 00:31:24,822 Hey, what's going on? 424 00:32:14,650 --> 00:32:17,483 Who'd you throw mud at before me? 425 00:32:18,453 --> 00:32:19,978 No one. 426 00:32:26,528 --> 00:32:27,518 This is great. 427 00:32:27,796 --> 00:32:29,230 How come you never had us over? 428 00:32:29,398 --> 00:32:32,368 My pops is kind of cranky. We have to be out by 6. 429 00:32:32,534 --> 00:32:35,868 Liz, where's the phone? They're doing another contest thingy. 430 00:32:36,038 --> 00:32:38,234 I don't know. Follow the cord. 431 00:32:38,407 --> 00:32:41,138 -You're never going to win. -You know what? Shut up. 432 00:32:41,310 --> 00:32:43,438 I gotta dial this number before I forget. 433 00:32:43,612 --> 00:32:47,378 -Did anybody get the hypotenuse? -Give it a rest. The test is in a week. 434 00:32:47,549 --> 00:32:50,450 -Can I have a piece of that chicken? -Sure. 435 00:32:52,588 --> 00:32:54,454 -Is it 6 already? -It's only 4:30. 436 00:32:58,794 --> 00:33:00,785 It's some drunk lady. 437 00:33:01,830 --> 00:33:04,265 Gross out! She puked right on the door. 438 00:33:04,533 --> 00:33:06,763 Oh, I'm going out the window. 439 00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:14,007 Oh, God, I don't feel very good. 440 00:33:14,176 --> 00:33:15,644 Can you help me, please? 441 00:33:15,811 --> 00:33:18,712 Yeah, what happened? Come on, this way. 442 00:33:19,915 --> 00:33:21,781 Well, there she blows. 443 00:33:23,185 --> 00:33:24,846 All right, up. 444 00:33:26,888 --> 00:33:28,356 All right. 445 00:33:28,523 --> 00:33:31,493 Pumpkin, pumpkin, pumpkin. 446 00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:33,787 I'm a good mom. 447 00:33:34,329 --> 00:33:36,161 I am a good mom. 448 00:33:36,331 --> 00:33:40,325 I just need a hug, okay, honey? I want a hug. I want a hug. 449 00:33:40,936 --> 00:33:42,961 -Come on. -Oh, God. 450 00:34:21,543 --> 00:34:23,102 There we go. 451 00:34:23,278 --> 00:34:25,212 All clean, see? 452 00:34:25,380 --> 00:34:30,284 She couldn't take living straight, why should I expect her to take dying? 453 00:34:30,786 --> 00:34:34,381 Isn't dying the hardest thing anyone's ever done? 454 00:34:34,690 --> 00:34:36,590 Everyone's gone. 455 00:34:37,359 --> 00:34:38,793 Except you. 456 00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:40,485 Yeah. 457 00:34:41,863 --> 00:34:43,831 So where does your grandpops sleep? 458 00:34:43,999 --> 00:34:47,230 -Here. -What, he sleeps with his daughter? 459 00:34:48,970 --> 00:34:52,406 -Well, I don't think like that. -Yeah, but you don't know. 460 00:34:53,809 --> 00:34:56,642 He did stuff to her sister when they were younger. 461 00:34:56,812 --> 00:34:58,906 She told me that. 462 00:35:00,682 --> 00:35:02,844 Why her sister and not her? 463 00:35:05,587 --> 00:35:07,351 I figure he did them both. 464 00:35:07,823 --> 00:35:09,257 So is her sister crazy too? 465 00:35:12,127 --> 00:35:15,062 Yeah. And their mother too. 466 00:35:16,098 --> 00:35:18,590 That's why I didn't want to come here. 467 00:35:20,669 --> 00:35:24,196 You know, my mom's getting back with my dad. 468 00:35:28,076 --> 00:35:29,976 I wish my mom would. 469 00:35:32,881 --> 00:35:35,976 He does stuff to my sister. 470 00:35:38,453 --> 00:35:39,784 You don't have a sister. 471 00:35:42,157 --> 00:35:43,955 Lucky for her. 472 00:35:44,826 --> 00:35:49,992 -Did you tell your mother? -Yeah, I told her when she left him... 473 00:35:50,165 --> 00:35:53,157 ...and she cursed him out, said she'd call the cops... 474 00:35:53,335 --> 00:35:55,394 ...and now she's getting back with him. 475 00:35:55,570 --> 00:36:00,030 I asked her how she could do that, and she said she missed him. 476 00:36:01,309 --> 00:36:03,141 She missed him. 477 00:36:06,047 --> 00:36:08,277 I was 7 when he first stuck it in. 478 00:36:08,784 --> 00:36:10,013 Chris! 479 00:36:10,185 --> 00:36:11,983 Chris, don't! 480 00:36:13,789 --> 00:36:15,655 Move in with me. 481 00:36:16,425 --> 00:36:18,951 -What, stay here? -Yeah. 482 00:36:20,595 --> 00:36:24,259 -Well, what will your grandfather say? -Well, he won't know. 483 00:36:24,433 --> 00:36:26,993 We'll work it out so he'll never see you. 484 00:36:27,169 --> 00:36:28,864 We won't get up until he leaves. 485 00:36:29,037 --> 00:36:32,632 -He's like a robot anyway. Out by 8-- -And back at 6. 486 00:36:32,808 --> 00:36:35,539 -Out. -Pops, she has no place to stay. 487 00:36:35,710 --> 00:36:37,906 -That's not my problem. Out! -Get off me! 488 00:36:38,079 --> 00:36:40,013 Leave her alone! Don't! 489 00:36:43,485 --> 00:36:44,782 Your mother's dying... 490 00:36:44,953 --> 00:36:48,480 ...your piece-of-trash father walked out and stuck me with you. 491 00:36:48,657 --> 00:36:52,059 Did I ask for this in my old age? Did I? 492 00:37:02,938 --> 00:37:04,599 What are you doing? 493 00:37:07,075 --> 00:37:09,476 Fine. That suits me. 494 00:37:09,878 --> 00:37:12,643 You'll end up trash anyway. 495 00:37:13,915 --> 00:37:16,441 Just like your parents. 496 00:37:29,431 --> 00:37:31,195 So I left. 497 00:37:35,337 --> 00:37:38,102 You wanna go get your stuff... 498 00:37:38,273 --> 00:37:40,867 ...or are you gonna leave me out here alone? 499 00:37:45,313 --> 00:37:47,577 Do any of us bargain for our lives? 500 00:37:47,949 --> 00:37:51,010 It seems to me we just kind of fall into them. 501 00:37:51,186 --> 00:37:52,779 We have to do the best we can. 502 00:37:52,954 --> 00:37:54,444 Let's go. 503 00:37:54,623 --> 00:37:56,614 My mother was dying. 504 00:37:56,791 --> 00:37:58,816 My father was gone. 505 00:37:59,561 --> 00:38:04,089 But I had to believe the road would rise up to meet me. 506 00:38:05,534 --> 00:38:08,435 I was 15 when I went out into the world. 507 00:38:16,177 --> 00:38:18,305 What's a home, anyway? 508 00:38:18,947 --> 00:38:20,540 A roof? 509 00:38:21,316 --> 00:38:22,943 Bed? 510 00:38:23,852 --> 00:38:28,813 A place where, when you go there, they have to take you? 511 00:38:29,357 --> 00:38:32,918 If so, then I was 15 when I became homeless. 512 00:38:34,429 --> 00:38:36,921 -Spare some change? -Get a job. 513 00:38:41,303 --> 00:38:43,362 How you doing tonight? 514 00:38:46,207 --> 00:38:48,301 God bless you, kid. 515 00:38:53,748 --> 00:38:55,648 Spare some change? 516 00:39:07,295 --> 00:39:11,254 But sometimes I felt like I had never had a home in my life. 517 00:39:29,484 --> 00:39:31,350 Oh, bring it on. 518 00:39:58,279 --> 00:39:59,906 Let's go. 519 00:40:20,535 --> 00:40:23,436 Where are you going? Come back here! 520 00:40:28,643 --> 00:40:33,342 And then, other times I knew wherever my mother was... 521 00:40:33,515 --> 00:40:35,210 ...that's where my home was. 522 00:41:13,021 --> 00:41:14,955 Oh, God. Oh, no. 523 00:41:17,625 --> 00:41:19,889 But month by month... 524 00:41:20,328 --> 00:41:21,796 ...she was fading away. 525 00:41:24,733 --> 00:41:25,962 Liz? 526 00:41:29,204 --> 00:41:30,729 Yeah. 527 00:41:34,509 --> 00:41:35,772 Where did you go? 528 00:41:37,178 --> 00:41:39,943 I've been staying with friends. 529 00:41:44,786 --> 00:41:46,117 I miss you. 530 00:41:52,393 --> 00:41:55,328 Pops, he hit me and-- You know. 531 00:41:58,299 --> 00:42:00,734 I couldn't stay here. 532 00:42:05,306 --> 00:42:09,004 Look, Lisa said you stopped going to school. 533 00:42:10,545 --> 00:42:12,274 I'm gonna go back. 534 00:42:13,014 --> 00:42:14,243 When? 535 00:42:17,819 --> 00:42:19,218 When you get better. 536 00:42:26,394 --> 00:42:28,692 They tease me. 537 00:42:29,364 --> 00:42:32,732 They tease me at the bar... 538 00:42:32,901 --> 00:42:35,233 ...because I shake. 539 00:42:36,938 --> 00:42:39,930 I can't stop shaking. 540 00:42:41,376 --> 00:42:43,470 I think that's-- 541 00:42:44,145 --> 00:42:46,546 That's because of the drinking, you know? 542 00:42:46,714 --> 00:42:48,182 You should probably stop. 543 00:42:49,517 --> 00:42:53,215 Oh, okay. Okay. 544 00:43:01,663 --> 00:43:04,189 You're gonna get better, you know? 545 00:43:18,713 --> 00:43:19,942 I love you, Mom. 546 00:43:27,021 --> 00:43:28,250 I love you. 547 00:43:54,782 --> 00:43:56,477 Get over there. 548 00:44:28,716 --> 00:44:30,582 Hey, guys, wait up. 549 00:44:31,886 --> 00:44:34,617 I'll catch you later, all right? I'm just gonna-- 550 00:44:36,357 --> 00:44:37,882 Bye. 551 00:44:39,527 --> 00:44:41,427 Mom. 552 00:44:47,135 --> 00:44:49,399 We took up a collection. 553 00:44:52,507 --> 00:44:56,102 She doesn't come in anymore. She thinks you're always laughing at her. 554 00:44:57,912 --> 00:44:59,971 She's dead, hon. 555 00:45:00,548 --> 00:45:02,983 She died yesterday morning. 556 00:46:04,679 --> 00:46:09,776 Sometimes I feel like there's skin on the world. 557 00:46:09,951 --> 00:46:13,910 And those of us who are born under it... 558 00:46:14,389 --> 00:46:16,756 ...can see through it. 559 00:46:17,258 --> 00:46:19,818 We just can't get through it. 560 00:46:28,202 --> 00:46:32,833 My mother was being buried in section 51, the charity plot. 561 00:46:35,676 --> 00:46:37,542 My mother was in there. 562 00:46:37,712 --> 00:46:39,476 Strangers had put her in there. 563 00:46:41,082 --> 00:46:42,914 Was she naked? Was she frightened? 564 00:46:44,318 --> 00:46:45,752 No. 565 00:46:45,920 --> 00:46:47,217 She was gone. 566 00:46:48,322 --> 00:46:51,223 -Come on, let's go. -No. Wait a minute. 567 00:46:51,392 --> 00:46:55,226 There should be a service. A priest. What's supposed to happen? 568 00:46:55,596 --> 00:46:58,065 When you go, we're gonna bury him. That's all. 569 00:46:58,399 --> 00:46:59,628 It's a she! 570 00:47:02,103 --> 00:47:04,595 -It's my mother. -There's no priest? 571 00:47:04,772 --> 00:47:06,672 Not in these cases. 572 00:47:06,841 --> 00:47:09,173 -You didn't know that? -She's dead. 573 00:47:09,911 --> 00:47:11,436 Put her in the ground. 574 00:47:14,715 --> 00:47:18,481 Priest or no priest, what did it matter? 575 00:47:18,653 --> 00:47:20,451 She was gone. 576 00:47:21,656 --> 00:47:23,624 She was already rotting. 577 00:47:24,192 --> 00:47:25,682 Sorry. 578 00:47:25,860 --> 00:47:29,524 Was I supposed to believe she had found eternal peace? 579 00:47:38,139 --> 00:47:40,107 So you coming, Liz? 580 00:47:43,244 --> 00:47:45,406 You know what? Just go. 581 00:47:49,650 --> 00:47:50,947 Hey, wait. 582 00:49:02,056 --> 00:49:03,854 Okay. 583 00:49:08,729 --> 00:49:10,663 Look... 584 00:49:11,499 --> 00:49:13,024 ...I'm getting out of here. 585 00:49:16,837 --> 00:49:19,363 Liz, you know, I just-- I can't-- I-- 586 00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:22,275 I can't do this anymore. 587 00:49:23,244 --> 00:49:26,214 You know? So I'm going. 588 00:49:26,814 --> 00:49:28,373 Where? 589 00:49:29,750 --> 00:49:31,184 Group home. 590 00:49:31,886 --> 00:49:33,251 Crazy house. 591 00:49:34,622 --> 00:49:38,616 You know what, Liz? It's this. This.... This is crazy. 592 00:49:42,396 --> 00:49:44,421 You should come with me. 593 00:49:50,705 --> 00:49:52,264 Yeah. 594 00:49:53,441 --> 00:49:55,432 So I'll see you around. 595 00:50:07,588 --> 00:50:09,488 People die. 596 00:50:10,057 --> 00:50:12,116 Things decay. 597 00:50:12,994 --> 00:50:17,227 Everything that seems so solid is meaningless. 598 00:50:19,300 --> 00:50:22,463 All that's left is the gestures we make. 599 00:50:23,004 --> 00:50:25,336 Gestures and error... 600 00:50:25,840 --> 00:50:27,808 ...that's what we remember. 601 00:50:27,975 --> 00:50:33,038 I remember riding with my mother through the leaves, the year ending... 602 00:50:33,214 --> 00:50:36,047 ...but her arms were warm around me. 603 00:50:36,217 --> 00:50:39,619 When I was little and she was well. 604 00:50:39,787 --> 00:50:41,516 That was long ago. 605 00:50:41,689 --> 00:50:45,785 Maybe it only happened once, maybe she betrayed me 1000 times... 606 00:50:45,960 --> 00:50:47,450 ...it didn't matter. 607 00:50:47,628 --> 00:50:50,325 Math was always my weakest subject. 608 00:50:50,498 --> 00:50:52,466 We remember what we choose. 609 00:50:52,633 --> 00:50:53,862 Get out of there! 610 00:51:07,682 --> 00:51:09,810 Where are you gonna put the stone? 611 00:51:10,251 --> 00:51:12,515 There's no stones here. There's no room. 612 00:51:19,360 --> 00:51:22,295 In a week, there would be no trace of her. 613 00:51:22,463 --> 00:51:24,363 But what did it matter? 614 00:51:24,532 --> 00:51:26,830 This wasn't the real world. 615 00:51:27,001 --> 00:51:29,595 We only really live in each other's hearts. 616 00:52:21,055 --> 00:52:23,490 She lived in my heart. 617 00:52:23,657 --> 00:52:25,853 But I lived nowhere. 618 00:52:26,227 --> 00:52:29,094 I was all alone in the world. 619 00:52:33,467 --> 00:52:37,165 You're 16 years old with an eighth-grade education... 620 00:52:37,338 --> 00:52:38,863 ...on a downward spiral... 621 00:52:39,039 --> 00:52:42,339 ...that will end in a worse place than you ever dreamed. 622 00:52:42,910 --> 00:52:46,778 You've burned every bridge, you've worn out every welcome... 623 00:52:46,947 --> 00:52:50,212 ...and everyone who has ever believed in you... 624 00:52:50,384 --> 00:52:52,512 ...you've let down. 625 00:52:55,055 --> 00:52:56,079 Eva? 626 00:53:05,533 --> 00:53:07,695 I don't want to be an idiot. 627 00:53:07,968 --> 00:53:09,732 I wanna go to school. 628 00:53:53,147 --> 00:53:55,844 -Yes? -I'm Liz Murray. I have an appointment. 629 00:53:57,151 --> 00:53:59,085 At 9:30. 630 00:53:59,453 --> 00:54:00,682 It's 10:30. 631 00:54:01,722 --> 00:54:05,056 -I'm sorry, the subway got stuck. -But it's really too late. 632 00:54:07,428 --> 00:54:10,728 School started three weeks ago, and we're just about full. 633 00:54:10,898 --> 00:54:12,992 With kids who get here on time, honey. 634 00:54:17,137 --> 00:54:18,798 I read the brochure. 635 00:54:18,973 --> 00:54:23,672 "Intensive student participation for the development of a just community." 636 00:54:26,180 --> 00:54:28,649 I just need one chance. 637 00:54:31,385 --> 00:54:33,376 You can wait and talk to David. 638 00:54:33,721 --> 00:54:36,247 But he's got this meeting right after. 639 00:54:42,196 --> 00:54:44,096 What makes Humanities Prep right for you? 640 00:54:44,331 --> 00:54:46,527 I've been thrown out of everything else. 641 00:54:46,700 --> 00:54:49,829 -You have? Public school, private school? -You name it. 642 00:54:58,846 --> 00:55:01,178 I knew at that moment I had to make a choice. 643 00:55:01,348 --> 00:55:06,115 I could submit to everything that was happening and live a life of excuses... 644 00:55:06,287 --> 00:55:08,415 ...or I could push myself. 645 00:55:08,589 --> 00:55:12,150 I could push myself and make my life good. 646 00:55:33,113 --> 00:55:36,174 -Okay, we'll get back to you by Friday. -Okay, thank you. 647 00:55:36,350 --> 00:55:38,546 Oh, it was a pleasure, guys. 648 00:55:40,988 --> 00:55:42,581 -Elizabeth? -Liz. 649 00:55:42,756 --> 00:55:45,248 We're making our last decisions, I'm late. 650 00:55:45,426 --> 00:55:48,555 Well, can't I just talk to you for a minute? Thirty seconds? 651 00:55:48,729 --> 00:55:52,393 Well, there's the application, there's the big essay question too. 652 00:55:52,566 --> 00:55:54,125 I've already done the essay. 653 00:55:54,301 --> 00:55:56,395 I really want this. 654 00:56:04,311 --> 00:56:09,181 I haven't had a lot of grownups that have proven to be trustworthy... 655 00:56:09,350 --> 00:56:11,341 ...or that they're in for the long run... 656 00:56:11,518 --> 00:56:14,886 ...so maybe I don't know how to talk to you, but.... 657 00:56:15,055 --> 00:56:19,117 My parents both used drugs, a lot of them. 658 00:56:19,293 --> 00:56:21,193 I won't go near them... 659 00:56:21,362 --> 00:56:24,024 ...but I guess I've kind of lived the lifestyle. 660 00:56:25,065 --> 00:56:28,524 I'm embarrassed now about how laid-back I've been. 661 00:56:28,702 --> 00:56:31,637 I've never been to school, except for the eighth grade. 662 00:56:31,805 --> 00:56:33,830 Your grades were good in elementary. 663 00:56:34,441 --> 00:56:37,206 I used to show up the last week and take the tests... 664 00:56:37,378 --> 00:56:39,506 ...and that's how I got promoted. 665 00:56:40,347 --> 00:56:44,875 I'm smart. I know I can succeed. I just need the chance. 666 00:56:45,686 --> 00:56:51,989 I need the chance to climb out of this place that I've been born in. 667 00:56:52,159 --> 00:56:57,654 Everyone I know, they're angry and tired and they're trying to survive. 668 00:56:59,733 --> 00:57:04,432 But I know that there's a world out there that's better... 669 00:57:04,605 --> 00:57:08,064 ...that's better developed and-- 670 00:57:08,676 --> 00:57:10,007 I want to live in it. 671 00:57:11,445 --> 00:57:12,537 Why now? 672 00:57:16,583 --> 00:57:18,745 My mother died of AIDS. 673 00:57:18,919 --> 00:57:21,854 She died a couple of months ago, and.... 674 00:57:22,923 --> 00:57:26,052 It was a real slap in the face. 675 00:57:29,563 --> 00:57:34,091 I guess I always thought that she was going to get better and take care of me. 676 00:57:36,303 --> 00:57:38,704 It's pretty stupid, huh? 677 00:57:38,872 --> 00:57:41,204 She had never taken care of me. 678 00:57:41,375 --> 00:57:43,400 I took care of her. 679 00:57:44,812 --> 00:57:46,211 She was my baby. 680 00:57:48,649 --> 00:57:50,640 But now she's gone. 681 00:57:51,185 --> 00:57:52,414 So.... 682 00:57:54,221 --> 00:57:56,849 Now it's time to take care of yourself. 683 00:58:00,160 --> 00:58:03,425 Can you get here on time, Liz? 684 00:58:03,764 --> 00:58:06,426 I'll sleep here if I have to. 685 00:58:06,734 --> 00:58:08,600 Okay, you're in. 686 00:58:09,002 --> 00:58:11,266 You told the others you wouldn't know until Friday. 687 00:58:11,438 --> 00:58:13,805 -You're in. -David. 688 00:58:13,974 --> 00:58:16,409 Thank you. He just changed my life! 689 00:58:16,910 --> 00:58:19,743 -Fast work, man. -We just have to file the paperwork. 690 00:58:19,913 --> 00:58:21,677 I've got your transcripts. 691 00:58:21,849 --> 00:58:25,581 Now it's just the easy stuff. Address, phone number. 692 00:58:25,753 --> 00:58:28,745 We have to have a meeting with a parent, legal guardian. 693 00:58:28,922 --> 00:58:31,653 Get that in, we're good to go. 694 00:59:03,690 --> 00:59:05,158 Dad. 695 00:59:08,829 --> 00:59:10,923 Hey. Lizzie. 696 00:59:12,699 --> 00:59:13,996 I need your help. 697 00:59:15,068 --> 00:59:16,593 Please. 698 00:59:17,538 --> 00:59:19,666 Such a production. 699 00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:23,777 Such a production. Why don't you stay in the Bronx and just go to Kennedy? 700 00:59:23,944 --> 00:59:26,436 I don't know how to go to a normal school. 701 00:59:26,613 --> 00:59:29,310 Well, why? This isn't a normal school? 702 00:59:29,583 --> 00:59:32,416 -Well, it's public, but it's like private. -Yeah. 703 00:59:32,586 --> 00:59:35,078 -Dad, Dad. -Yeah? 704 00:59:37,224 --> 00:59:39,386 You know, I think I can do this. 705 00:59:39,560 --> 00:59:41,028 Yeah? That's good. 706 00:59:42,996 --> 00:59:46,455 -I don't think I can. -Yeah, you can, you can. 707 00:59:46,834 --> 00:59:51,169 Look, just say you're a long-haul truck driver, that's why they'll never see you. 708 00:59:51,772 --> 00:59:54,298 We're living with your girlfriend now, also. 709 00:59:54,474 --> 00:59:57,171 Well, a long-haul truck-- You gave me a girlfriend? 710 00:59:58,478 --> 01:00:00,970 -Eva. -Eva? That's not good. 711 01:00:01,148 --> 01:00:04,709 -Eva's old enough to be my mother. -Dad, I just-- 712 01:00:05,552 --> 01:00:07,520 I just need an address, you know? 713 01:00:07,688 --> 01:00:09,816 A phone number they can call. 714 01:00:09,990 --> 01:00:11,048 Please? 715 01:00:11,291 --> 01:00:13,783 Please. I mean, they can't know I'm homeless. 716 01:00:13,961 --> 01:00:16,987 They'll call the city, and I'll get locked up again. 717 01:00:19,032 --> 01:00:20,431 Okay. 718 01:00:20,601 --> 01:00:22,501 -Yeah? -Okay. 719 01:00:26,607 --> 01:00:30,202 -Mr. Murray. -I'm Peter. Peter Finiti. 720 01:00:30,377 --> 01:00:35,372 -I never actually married Liz's mother. -Okay, well, sit down. Please. 721 01:00:42,623 --> 01:00:47,083 I'm grateful that you're taking my daughter in. This is a pretty nice place. 722 01:00:47,261 --> 01:00:49,855 Well, we're still new. We have big ambitions. 723 01:00:50,030 --> 01:00:52,294 So does Liz, I guess. She's a feminist. 724 01:00:52,933 --> 01:00:54,560 I expect you knew that already. 725 01:00:54,735 --> 01:00:58,194 Her mother actually was beautiful, looked like a movie star. 726 01:00:58,372 --> 01:01:01,364 Her mother was also kind of a feminist too, or something. 727 01:01:01,808 --> 01:01:05,369 Anyway, I thought when I met her that she was just spirited... 728 01:01:05,545 --> 01:01:07,570 ...but she was completely insane. 729 01:01:08,615 --> 01:01:10,743 We just need you to sign right here. 730 01:01:12,386 --> 01:01:15,447 And give us contact information, address and phone number. 731 01:01:17,224 --> 01:01:19,022 Yeah, okay. 732 01:01:19,259 --> 01:01:22,229 University Avenue. 3458. 733 01:01:22,396 --> 01:01:24,592 -Is there an apartment? -Yep, 2B. 734 01:01:24,765 --> 01:01:27,257 -3B. -3B, 3B. Yeah, that's right. 735 01:01:27,434 --> 01:01:29,459 Yeah, that's right, we moved upstairs. 736 01:01:30,103 --> 01:01:31,764 Phone number? 737 01:01:35,309 --> 01:01:37,539 Oh, 718. 738 01:01:38,879 --> 01:01:40,973 -555. -555. 739 01:01:41,148 --> 01:01:44,209 -5767. -55767. 740 01:01:44,384 --> 01:01:46,910 555-5767, yeah. 741 01:01:47,087 --> 01:01:49,021 My memory-- My mind's totally shot. 742 01:01:51,158 --> 01:01:54,093 -So that's it? I got stuff I gotta do. -That's it. 743 01:01:54,628 --> 01:01:57,029 -Thanks for coming. -Thank you for helping. 744 01:01:58,765 --> 01:02:00,358 Can I start now? 745 01:02:00,701 --> 01:02:03,193 It's refreshing someone wants to come to school. 746 01:02:03,370 --> 01:02:05,771 -Yeah. -I'm gonna walk him out. 747 01:02:19,453 --> 01:02:21,217 All right. 748 01:02:22,589 --> 01:02:26,492 -What, they gave you tokens here? -No, I got a job. 749 01:02:27,227 --> 01:02:31,164 I remember when you were a kid, you bagged groceries down on Fordham Road. 750 01:02:31,331 --> 01:02:34,665 -Put food in the fridge. How old were you? -Eight. 751 01:02:41,908 --> 01:02:43,376 I'm not a people person. 752 01:02:43,543 --> 01:02:45,568 -You understand that. -Yeah. 753 01:02:45,746 --> 01:02:47,737 I'm just not a people person, Liz. 754 01:02:47,914 --> 01:02:50,747 It's got nothing to do with you. It's not personal. 755 01:02:51,752 --> 01:02:55,188 -You came today, though. -Yeah. 756 01:02:58,191 --> 01:02:59,420 I love you, Dad. 757 01:03:00,127 --> 01:03:03,995 Oh, don't do that. Don't love me. It's a waste of energy. 758 01:03:06,233 --> 01:03:09,828 You know, when I was little... 759 01:03:10,937 --> 01:03:13,929 ...you were the most interesting thing in my world. 760 01:03:14,107 --> 01:03:17,737 Everyone was just talking about... 761 01:03:19,012 --> 01:03:22,038 ...drugs or sex or-- 762 01:03:22,582 --> 01:03:25,449 You know, just trying to survive the day. 763 01:03:26,820 --> 01:03:28,914 But you always had ideas. 764 01:03:31,691 --> 01:03:36,788 It's because of you I know that there's another way of being. 765 01:03:43,570 --> 01:03:45,299 Are you okay? 766 01:03:46,973 --> 01:03:50,876 Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. They take care of me fine down at the shelter. 767 01:03:51,044 --> 01:03:54,446 You know, actually, I'm gonna get my own apartment. 768 01:03:54,614 --> 01:03:58,847 You know, they like to do that. You can come stay with me, visit me anytime. 769 01:03:59,019 --> 01:04:01,386 -Your own apartment? -Yeah. 770 01:04:01,555 --> 01:04:05,958 You know, they like to do that, you know. They keep people like me out of shelters. 771 01:04:07,194 --> 01:04:10,129 You know, the people, the patients. 772 01:04:10,297 --> 01:04:13,028 You know, people with AIDS, so.... 773 01:04:14,501 --> 01:04:16,663 Hey, listen. Hey, no, no, no. 774 01:04:16,837 --> 01:04:19,636 A lot has changed since Jean. They got medicines now. 775 01:04:19,806 --> 01:04:21,137 And I'm clean. 776 01:04:21,308 --> 01:04:23,367 So I'm gonna live forever. 777 01:04:26,847 --> 01:04:29,612 Okay. I'll be fine. 778 01:04:30,650 --> 01:04:32,584 I'm gonna live forever. 779 01:04:37,791 --> 01:04:39,953 Stay in school. 780 01:04:40,994 --> 01:04:42,723 I blew this... 781 01:04:42,896 --> 01:04:44,830 ...but you can do this. 782 01:05:05,285 --> 01:05:07,185 -Gulf of Tonkin. -Remember the Maine. 783 01:05:07,354 --> 01:05:11,985 Anybody? Franco-Prussian war? Yo, did you get Bismarck? 784 01:05:12,192 --> 01:05:13,853 You didn't get Bismarck. 785 01:05:14,027 --> 01:05:16,257 -l thought Bismarck was a roll. -A cake. 786 01:05:16,429 --> 01:05:18,727 -It's a Kaiser roll. -ls Bismarck a Kaiser? 787 01:05:18,899 --> 01:05:21,300 Stop talking. You're making me hungry. 788 01:05:21,468 --> 01:05:25,598 Dave, are we gonna get textbooks next year? I keep losing these things. 789 01:05:25,772 --> 01:05:27,365 Textbooks. 790 01:05:27,541 --> 01:05:31,375 -Why don't we use textbooks? Anyone? -They're too heavy? 791 01:05:32,879 --> 01:05:34,813 They are, but no cigar. 792 01:05:34,981 --> 01:05:37,109 They're too expensive. The school's poor. 793 01:05:37,584 --> 01:05:40,986 I'm keeping my cigars today. You, new girl. 794 01:05:41,154 --> 01:05:44,454 -Her name is Liz. -She's been here a week. Try and remember. 795 01:05:44,624 --> 01:05:46,615 Liz. Sue me. 796 01:05:46,793 --> 01:05:48,022 Here. 797 01:05:49,796 --> 01:05:52,959 Textbook. Textbook. 798 01:05:53,133 --> 01:05:55,067 Go ahead, open it up. 799 01:05:57,170 --> 01:05:58,467 What do you see? 800 01:05:58,638 --> 01:05:59,867 Words. 801 01:06:00,974 --> 01:06:02,635 What kind of words? 802 01:06:03,443 --> 01:06:04,968 The words of the author. 803 01:06:06,079 --> 01:06:08,741 No, no, this is important. 804 01:06:09,349 --> 01:06:11,010 And what do we have here? 805 01:06:12,919 --> 01:06:14,546 A lot of other people's words. 806 01:06:15,021 --> 01:06:16,819 Why do I want you to have them? 807 01:06:20,994 --> 01:06:25,989 Because one point of view gives you a one-dimensional world. 808 01:06:27,400 --> 01:06:28,890 Cigars. 809 01:06:29,069 --> 01:06:30,127 Cigars. 810 01:06:30,804 --> 01:06:33,205 Bismarck, Marx... 811 01:06:33,373 --> 01:06:36,070 ...the guy who sold me the bubble-gum cigars. 812 01:06:36,243 --> 01:06:41,113 Why on earth would we want to confine ourselves to his story? 813 01:06:41,514 --> 01:06:43,744 -History. -But isn't that the deal, Dave? 814 01:06:43,917 --> 01:06:49,321 -I mean, isn't there an official history? -New girl, tell them what history is. 815 01:06:51,791 --> 01:06:54,817 History is all of us. 816 01:06:55,428 --> 01:06:57,522 All our stories count. 817 01:07:02,369 --> 01:07:05,134 That's it. Grab your papers. 818 01:07:05,305 --> 01:07:08,172 I'll be in the lounge if you want to talk about them. 819 01:07:17,484 --> 01:07:20,647 Hey, Liz. This one's yours. 820 01:07:37,037 --> 01:07:38,732 Hey, new girl. 821 01:07:38,905 --> 01:07:40,634 You don't remember my name? 822 01:07:40,807 --> 01:07:44,175 I remember your name. I like the others to gang up on your side. 823 01:07:46,413 --> 01:07:47,847 You're pretty smart. 824 01:07:48,281 --> 01:07:50,045 So are you. 825 01:07:50,250 --> 01:07:53,982 -You gave me an A minus. -Yeah, I thought it was a very good paper. 826 01:07:54,321 --> 01:07:59,054 -How do I make it an A? -Liz, an A minus is an excellent mark. 827 01:07:59,225 --> 01:08:02,661 This is your first schoolwork in, what, forever? 828 01:08:03,496 --> 01:08:05,555 If my words count... 829 01:08:06,166 --> 01:08:08,294 ...I want them to be right. 830 01:08:11,938 --> 01:08:13,599 Okay. 831 01:08:13,907 --> 01:08:15,272 Well... 832 01:08:15,975 --> 01:08:19,434 ...your premise is a good one, but.... 833 01:08:39,933 --> 01:08:42,095 What are you still doing here? 834 01:08:42,435 --> 01:08:46,736 -Algebra. -Yeah, well, it's after 11. I'm locking up. 835 01:08:51,711 --> 01:08:55,079 -How many classes are you taking? -The regular five. 836 01:08:56,082 --> 01:09:00,212 And the Saturday programming... 837 01:09:00,387 --> 01:09:02,913 ...the night-school French... 838 01:09:03,089 --> 01:09:07,822 ...and the after-school science thingies. 839 01:09:08,261 --> 01:09:09,956 Ten. 840 01:09:10,130 --> 01:09:12,565 Now you see why I need the before-school math. 841 01:09:12,832 --> 01:09:14,061 That's an awful lot. 842 01:09:15,135 --> 01:09:19,231 I'm 17. I don't want to be 21 before I finish high school. 843 01:09:19,406 --> 01:09:22,706 So you're trying to do four years of high school in three? 844 01:09:23,376 --> 01:09:25,037 Two. 845 01:09:25,245 --> 01:09:28,237 -You need the before-school math too. -Yeah. 846 01:09:28,415 --> 01:09:31,749 -You're going to kill yourself, you know? -No. 847 01:09:32,352 --> 01:09:34,252 Now I'm going to live. 848 01:10:14,828 --> 01:10:16,762 I had it down. 849 01:10:17,030 --> 01:10:20,864 The B train took 70 minutes to do its entire run. 850 01:10:21,267 --> 01:10:25,727 Up and back four times, and I would be at school just a little early. 851 01:10:26,105 --> 01:10:28,164 And David would let me in. 852 01:10:28,775 --> 01:10:32,473 For the first time, my life had some order I could count on. 853 01:10:36,149 --> 01:10:39,983 Eighth Avenue and 14th Street. Watch the doors. 854 01:10:55,935 --> 01:10:57,528 Chris! 855 01:10:59,472 --> 01:11:01,941 Chris, Chris. 856 01:11:02,609 --> 01:11:03,872 You got the name down. 857 01:11:04,043 --> 01:11:06,341 -What are you doing here? -Hanging out. 858 01:11:06,513 --> 01:11:08,481 What about the home? 859 01:11:08,848 --> 01:11:10,543 Playing hooky. 860 01:11:11,985 --> 01:11:13,953 So how come you didn't look for me? 861 01:11:14,120 --> 01:11:15,485 I did. 862 01:11:15,655 --> 01:11:18,784 I've been looking for a long time. It's just-- 863 01:11:18,958 --> 01:11:22,326 You haven't been in any of your places, you know? 864 01:11:22,495 --> 01:11:24,862 I'm here now, and I'm going to a new school. 865 01:11:25,031 --> 01:11:26,692 You'd like it. 866 01:11:28,334 --> 01:11:29,824 Hey. 867 01:11:30,203 --> 01:11:31,728 Hey, come on. 868 01:11:31,905 --> 01:11:35,205 Come on, everything's great. We're together. 869 01:11:56,963 --> 01:12:00,331 -Last one out, first one in. -No, that describes you, David. 870 01:12:00,500 --> 01:12:02,161 How did you get so dedicated? 871 01:12:02,335 --> 01:12:07,501 Well, I'm such a privileged jerk, I wanted to give something back. 872 01:12:07,674 --> 01:12:09,267 And this is? 873 01:12:09,442 --> 01:12:12,605 -My friend, Chris. My best friend. -Hi, Chris. 874 01:12:12,779 --> 01:12:14,144 Hey. 875 01:12:14,480 --> 01:12:16,141 I want her to come here too. 876 01:12:16,316 --> 01:12:18,341 It's no party. It's a tough place. 877 01:12:18,518 --> 01:12:22,250 But if she's good enough for you, she's good enough for me. Come on in. 878 01:12:26,259 --> 01:12:28,557 So, what were you putting on the board? 879 01:12:28,728 --> 01:12:32,323 We decided we would send our top 10 students on a trip to Boston. 880 01:12:32,665 --> 01:12:34,429 -Cool. -You ever been? 881 01:12:34,601 --> 01:12:36,535 I've never been out of New York. 882 01:12:36,703 --> 01:12:38,296 We went to Queens once. 883 01:12:38,471 --> 01:12:40,098 Well, you're going. 884 01:12:40,273 --> 01:12:43,868 Come on. No way am I one of the top 10 students. 885 01:12:44,043 --> 01:12:47,638 Oh, you're not one of the top, you're the top. 886 01:12:47,914 --> 01:12:50,178 You get the best grades in this whole place. 887 01:12:51,918 --> 01:12:54,512 Yeah, so what? She's going to Boston? 888 01:12:54,687 --> 01:12:56,451 All expenses paid. 889 01:12:56,623 --> 01:12:58,785 -How long? -Five days. 890 01:13:08,267 --> 01:13:10,099 You okay, Liz? 891 01:13:10,570 --> 01:13:11,935 Yeah. 892 01:13:12,972 --> 01:13:15,964 I've just always been trash, you know? 893 01:13:16,142 --> 01:13:18,133 You're not trash. 894 01:13:19,812 --> 01:13:22,941 This is to get you thinking about college. 895 01:13:24,083 --> 01:13:27,519 -What's college like? -It's all crap. Shut up! 896 01:13:28,354 --> 01:13:30,345 You can come too. 897 01:13:30,523 --> 01:13:33,083 -Can't she? -Sure, if she does the work. 898 01:13:33,259 --> 01:13:36,490 -Not frigging interested, thanks. -Come on. Dream a little. 899 01:13:36,663 --> 01:13:38,631 What do you wanna be when you grow up? 900 01:13:38,798 --> 01:13:41,290 Boy, I've been grown since I was 7. 901 01:13:42,235 --> 01:13:46,229 -I mean after high school. It's okay. -No, it's not okay. 902 01:13:46,406 --> 01:13:49,307 I'll be a garbage man. I'll be a prostitute. 903 01:13:55,581 --> 01:13:58,209 Who cares what the hell I'm gonna be? 904 01:14:06,559 --> 01:14:08,755 Welcome to Harvard, guys. 905 01:14:08,928 --> 01:14:11,488 Look at the great photo op. 906 01:14:36,222 --> 01:14:38,554 So does it look like you thought it would? 907 01:14:39,692 --> 01:14:41,217 Better. 908 01:14:42,261 --> 01:14:43,956 Unattainably better. 909 01:14:44,130 --> 01:14:47,293 Liz, they're just people. 910 01:14:48,735 --> 01:14:50,863 Not people like me. 911 01:14:52,405 --> 01:14:54,703 Why not people like me? 912 01:14:54,874 --> 01:14:56,467 What made them so different? 913 01:14:57,210 --> 01:14:59,645 Because of where they were born? 914 01:15:03,282 --> 01:15:08,482 I was working as hard as I could so I didn't end up on food stamps or hustling. 915 01:15:09,856 --> 01:15:13,121 What--? What if I worked even more? 916 01:15:14,994 --> 01:15:18,020 I was so close to the skin now, I could touch it. 917 01:15:29,609 --> 01:15:31,407 It would be a reach. 918 01:15:32,078 --> 01:15:33,546 But it's not impossible. 919 01:15:42,955 --> 01:15:45,890 Dawn, are there any other scholarships? 920 01:15:46,058 --> 01:15:47,617 That's quite a few. 921 01:15:48,961 --> 01:15:52,898 "Write 1500 words on the importance of the free market in the free world... 922 01:15:53,065 --> 01:15:56,160 ...and win $500." Yeah. 923 01:15:56,536 --> 01:15:59,528 I'd only need 70 of those every year. 924 01:16:00,740 --> 01:16:03,232 There was something new from The New York Times. 925 01:16:03,409 --> 01:16:05,844 Maybe I didn't put it in yet. 926 01:16:14,821 --> 01:16:16,755 Twelve thousand dollars. 927 01:16:16,923 --> 01:16:20,518 -Every year for four years. -What do you have to do? 928 01:16:21,294 --> 01:16:23,729 "Attach an essay describing what you believe... 929 01:16:23,896 --> 01:16:26,661 ...to be the most significant academic achievement... 930 01:16:26,833 --> 01:16:31,634 ...and how you have overcome any challenges or obstacles.” 931 01:16:32,271 --> 01:16:34,069 Can I have a copy of this? 932 01:16:35,608 --> 01:16:41,547 I want to stand beside people on the sidewalk and not be so far beneath them. 933 01:16:41,981 --> 01:16:45,542 I want to go to Harvard and become very developed... 934 01:16:45,718 --> 01:16:47,982 ...read all the best books. 935 01:16:50,690 --> 01:16:52,749 And then I'd find myself thinking: 936 01:16:53,326 --> 01:16:55,420 "What if I just go crazy... 937 01:16:55,595 --> 01:16:58,963 ...and use every bit of my potential to do that?" 938 01:17:01,200 --> 01:17:02,531 I have to do it. 939 01:17:03,536 --> 01:17:05,527 I have no choice. 940 01:17:08,541 --> 01:17:09,906 Am I late? 941 01:17:10,076 --> 01:17:12,545 No, I'm early. 942 01:17:12,979 --> 01:17:15,107 I made you some coffee. 943 01:17:16,315 --> 01:17:19,148 -One Sweet 'N Low, right? -Right. 944 01:17:24,957 --> 01:17:26,823 Thank you. 945 01:17:28,794 --> 01:17:31,092 Can I have a stamp for this? 946 01:17:31,264 --> 01:17:34,700 The New York Times scholarship. You haven't mailed that in yet? 947 01:17:34,867 --> 01:17:36,562 When's the deadline? 948 01:17:36,736 --> 01:17:37,999 Tomorrow. 949 01:17:38,170 --> 01:17:41,765 I gave you that four months ago. What were you waiting for? 950 01:17:42,041 --> 01:17:43,600 For today. 951 01:17:43,776 --> 01:17:45,244 For me to turn 18. 952 01:17:46,245 --> 01:17:48,043 It's your birthday? 953 01:17:49,815 --> 01:17:51,146 Happy birthday. 954 01:17:52,351 --> 01:17:54,911 But I don't think there's an age requirement. 955 01:17:55,087 --> 01:17:56,680 No. 956 01:17:57,189 --> 01:17:58,247 Thank you. 957 01:17:59,025 --> 01:18:00,993 But now I could tell the truth. 958 01:18:01,160 --> 01:18:02,821 That I was homeless. 959 01:18:02,995 --> 01:18:06,124 And no one could come and take me away. 960 01:18:24,116 --> 01:18:25,675 Lisa? 961 01:18:28,587 --> 01:18:30,180 Liz? 962 01:18:32,325 --> 01:18:33,588 What are you doing here? 963 01:18:35,628 --> 01:18:37,824 I have this interview. 964 01:18:38,397 --> 01:18:43,062 I'm a finalist for a big New York Times scholarship... 965 01:18:44,103 --> 01:18:46,071 ...but I don't have anything to wear. 966 01:18:47,473 --> 01:18:48,804 You want my clothes? 967 01:18:49,208 --> 01:18:51,870 Well, nothing fancy. 968 01:18:52,111 --> 01:18:54,443 Just something I can put over this. 969 01:19:06,559 --> 01:19:08,084 Thank you. 970 01:19:10,262 --> 01:19:12,731 Mama sold my coat once. 971 01:19:13,165 --> 01:19:14,599 I couldn't go to school. 972 01:19:16,369 --> 01:19:18,030 I remember. 973 01:19:18,604 --> 01:19:20,129 I cried. 974 01:19:20,306 --> 01:19:22,832 I loved going to school so much. 975 01:19:25,011 --> 01:19:27,173 You never went to school. 976 01:19:27,880 --> 01:19:29,871 Why would they give you a scholarship? 977 01:19:34,020 --> 01:19:37,217 Because I'm homeless and I'm doing really well in school now. 978 01:19:37,390 --> 01:19:40,951 You're not homeless, Liz. You could stay here. 979 01:19:43,696 --> 01:19:45,391 No, I couldn't. 980 01:19:46,499 --> 01:19:47,728 You know that. 981 01:19:49,201 --> 01:19:50,635 Pop hates you. 982 01:19:57,443 --> 01:19:59,036 I'm going blind. 983 01:20:01,981 --> 01:20:03,847 Like Mama. 984 01:20:06,452 --> 01:20:08,216 I'm scared. 985 01:20:40,352 --> 01:20:43,253 They kicked me out of the group home. And all my stuff! 986 01:20:43,422 --> 01:20:47,416 -They can't kick you out, you're not 18 yet. -They'll put me in Brooklyn. 987 01:20:47,593 --> 01:20:49,891 I don't wanna go to Brooklyn. Help me! 988 01:20:50,062 --> 01:20:53,259 -I have an interview, all right? -No, you can't leave me! 989 01:20:53,432 --> 01:20:55,400 -I have to. -You can't just leave me. 990 01:20:55,568 --> 01:20:56,797 Chris! Chris! 991 01:20:58,804 --> 01:21:02,263 Let me get through this thing, then you can go to school with me. 992 01:21:02,441 --> 01:21:05,467 I don't want to! I don't belong there, and neither do you! 993 01:21:06,679 --> 01:21:08,078 Yes, I do. 994 01:21:08,614 --> 01:21:11,640 You think they let people like us into Harvard? 995 01:21:52,825 --> 01:21:54,850 The world moves. 996 01:21:55,828 --> 01:21:57,262 You're just a speck. 997 01:21:58,097 --> 01:22:00,725 It can all happen without you. 998 01:22:01,133 --> 01:22:05,502 Situations are not conducive to what you want for yourself. 999 01:22:05,838 --> 01:22:08,068 Someone else's needs... 1000 01:22:08,240 --> 01:22:11,642 ...someone else's plight, is going to be stronger than yours is. 1001 01:22:12,645 --> 01:22:16,639 I think people just get frustrated with how harsh life can be... 1002 01:22:16,815 --> 01:22:20,251 ...so they spend their time dwelling on that frustration... 1003 01:22:20,419 --> 01:22:22,114 ...and calling it anger. 1004 01:22:22,288 --> 01:22:25,417 Keeping their eyes shut to the wholeness of the situation... 1005 01:22:25,591 --> 01:22:32,019 ...to all the little tiny things that have come together to make it... 1006 01:22:32,198 --> 01:22:33,927 ...what itis. 1007 01:22:35,367 --> 01:22:37,665 I was turned so inward by my mom and dad... 1008 01:22:37,836 --> 01:22:42,797 ...I got a chance to see how all the little tiny things come together... 1009 01:22:42,975 --> 01:22:45,376 ...to make the final product. 1010 01:22:45,978 --> 01:22:52,350 So I was never inclined to wonder why this or why that. 1011 01:22:52,518 --> 01:22:54,213 I knew why. 1012 01:22:54,753 --> 01:22:57,313 Not that I was happy about it. 1013 01:22:57,489 --> 01:23:00,584 In fact, I was really sad about it most of the time. 1014 01:23:00,960 --> 01:23:03,224 But I was very accepting. 1015 01:23:04,029 --> 01:23:06,259 I was very accepting. 1016 01:23:07,166 --> 01:23:11,034 I just always knew that I needed to get out. 1017 01:23:13,906 --> 01:23:16,238 Is there anything else you'd like to tell us? 1018 01:23:19,845 --> 01:23:21,870 I loved my mother. 1019 01:23:22,047 --> 01:23:24,015 So much. 1020 01:23:24,183 --> 01:23:26,515 She was a drug addict. 1021 01:23:26,685 --> 01:23:28,881 She was an alcoholic. 1022 01:23:29,121 --> 01:23:33,024 She was legally blind. She was a schizophrenic. 1023 01:23:34,460 --> 01:23:35,985 But... 1024 01:23:36,795 --> 01:23:38,695 ...I never forgot... 1025 01:23:38,964 --> 01:23:42,093 ...that she did love me. 1026 01:23:45,604 --> 01:23:47,971 Even if she did. 1027 01:23:48,474 --> 01:23:50,169 All the time. 1028 01:23:52,444 --> 01:23:54,811 All the time. All.... 1029 01:23:56,348 --> 01:23:58,180 All the time. 1030 01:24:06,358 --> 01:24:10,090 I hope you all know how much I really need this. 1031 01:24:10,963 --> 01:24:15,833 How I can't go to college or anything without it. 1032 01:25:04,850 --> 01:25:09,344 She earned a 95 average and finished at the top of her class of 150. 1033 01:25:09,755 --> 01:25:12,986 She did it while completing four years of high school in two. 1034 01:25:13,258 --> 01:25:15,784 She did it while homeless, her mother dead... 1035 01:25:15,961 --> 01:25:18,396 ...her father a drug addict living in shelters. 1036 01:25:18,564 --> 01:25:22,296 And any way I describe this can't do justice to her accomplishments. 1037 01:25:22,468 --> 01:25:26,564 So I'll just introduce to you our sixth New York Times scholarship winner... 1038 01:25:26,739 --> 01:25:28,537 ...Liz Murray. 1039 01:25:31,677 --> 01:25:33,236 Congratulations. 1040 01:25:37,850 --> 01:25:40,444 Everything's changed. 1041 01:25:41,286 --> 01:25:44,187 My life will never be the same... 1042 01:25:44,356 --> 01:25:47,758 ...and I don't know what else to say except for thank you. 1043 01:25:47,926 --> 01:25:49,826 Thank you very much. 1044 01:25:50,996 --> 01:25:52,259 Liz! 1045 01:25:53,999 --> 01:25:55,728 How did you do this? 1046 01:25:55,901 --> 01:25:57,767 How could I not do it? 1047 01:25:57,936 --> 01:25:59,927 My parents showed me the alternative. 1048 01:26:00,105 --> 01:26:02,904 Didn't you ever feel sorry for yourself? 1049 01:26:03,075 --> 01:26:04,065 Sorry? 1050 01:26:04,243 --> 01:26:07,213 Sleeping in subways, eating out of dumpsters. 1051 01:26:08,580 --> 01:26:10,878 That had always been my life. 1052 01:26:12,251 --> 01:26:13,912 And I really.... 1053 01:26:14,086 --> 01:26:17,989 I feel that I got lucky because any sense of security... 1054 01:26:18,157 --> 01:26:22,594 ...was pulled out from under me, so I was forced to look forward. 1055 01:26:22,761 --> 01:26:25,890 I had to. There was no going back. 1056 01:26:26,331 --> 01:26:30,393 And I reached a point where I just thought, "All right. 1057 01:26:30,569 --> 01:26:35,439 I'm going to work as hard as I possibly can and see what happens.” 1058 01:26:36,675 --> 01:26:40,009 And now I'm going to college... 1059 01:26:40,179 --> 01:26:42,546 ...and The New York Times is going to pay. 1060 01:26:46,852 --> 01:26:48,081 So you were lucky... 1061 01:26:49,588 --> 01:26:53,923 ...but is there anything you'd change if you were able? 1062 01:26:59,932 --> 01:27:01,730 I'd give it back. 1063 01:27:03,535 --> 01:27:05,230 All of it. 1064 01:27:07,005 --> 01:27:09,406 If I could have my family back. 1065 01:27:15,714 --> 01:27:17,580 I got into Harvard. 1066 01:27:17,749 --> 01:27:20,548 I got a job at The New York Times. 1067 01:27:20,719 --> 01:27:22,619 I got an apartment. 1068 01:27:23,388 --> 01:27:26,085 I don't have to carry my whole life with me anymore. 1069 01:27:27,125 --> 01:27:30,186 I don't have to carry my whole life with me... 1070 01:27:30,929 --> 01:27:32,590 ...but I do. 1071 01:27:34,366 --> 01:27:38,234 Everyone I've known, everything I've done. 1072 01:27:38,403 --> 01:27:40,667 Pieces chip off. 1073 01:27:40,839 --> 01:27:43,672 I forget the little things. 1074 01:27:46,578 --> 01:27:49,513 It's still hard to carry... 1075 01:27:50,616 --> 01:27:52,175 ...alone. 1076 01:27:53,919 --> 01:27:55,978 So that's why I've told you. 1077 01:27:56,688 --> 01:27:58,918 That's why I've told you my story. 1078 01:27:59,091 --> 01:28:02,152 Now I can lay that burden down... 1079 01:28:02,828 --> 01:28:04,887 ...put it to rest... 1080 01:28:06,298 --> 01:28:08,289 ...and I can go on. 1081 01:28:13,672 --> 01:28:15,162 Hi, Mom. 1082 01:30:45,791 --> 01:30:47,782 [ENGLISH]