>> START THE CLOCK.
>> Bill: THANK YOU, PLEASE,
SIT DOWN.
I KNOW WHY YOU'RE HAPPY TODAY,
IT'S MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND.
CHEERING AT HOME.
I LOVE MEMORIAL DAY, I'M GLAD
IT'S CALM BECAUSE FINALLY, I
HAVE A CHANCE TO JUST KICK BACK
AND HANG AROUND THE HOUSE.
WE ALL SHOULD LOVE MEMORIAL DAY,
WE SHOULD REMEMBER THE BRAVE
AMERICANS WHO PUT THE LIVES ON
THE LINE TO PROTECT OUR WAY OF
LIFE -- I'M TALKING OF COURSE
ABOUT THE DELIVERY PEOPLE FROM
GRUBHUB.
THE BIG MEDICAL NEWS THIS WEEK
IS REMEMBER HYDROXYCHLOROQUINE?
THE STUFF THEY SAID WAS GOING TO
BE THAT BIG YOU ARE ALL, THEN
THEY SAID IT DOESN'T WORK, IT'S
NOT FOR THIS -- TRUMP NOW SAYS
HE'S ON IT, HE'S TAKING IT.
NOT ONLY THAT, HE GOT MAD AT THE
FOX NEWS ANCHOR NEIL CAVUTO
BECAUSE NEIL CAVUTO HEARD HIM
SAY I'M TAKING THIS STUFF AND HE
SAID THAT WILL KILL YOU.
TRUMP -- THIS MAN, FIRST HE SAYS
LET'S TRY DRINKING HOUSEHOLD
DISINFECTANT.
NOW HE'S ON THIS SHIT.
TODAY, VLADIMIR PUTIN SAYS I
HOPE WE DON'T HAVE TO POISON
THIS MOTHERFUCKER, I DON'T KNOW
IF WE HAVE ANYTHING STRONG
ENOUGH.
THIS DRUG IS FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE
LUPUS OR MALARIA.
WRAP YOUR MIND AROUND THIS: THE
PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
HAS PUT HIMSELF ON A DRUG FOR
TWO DISEASES HE DOES NOT HAVE,
ALSO HE'S STARTING SOMETHING
NEXT WEEK FOR VAGINITIS.
JUST TO BE SAFE.
I DON'T GET THIS DONALD TRUMP.
HE'S NEVER HAD A DRINK, NEVER
DID POT, NO DRUGS IN COLLEGE BUT
AT THE AGE OF 73, LAURA INGRAHAM
COMES BY AND SAYS HEY MAN, PUT
THIS ON YOUR TONGUE AND HE'S
LIKE "I'M ALL IN."
BUT OF COURSE HE ALWAYS IS THE
MASTER OF CHANGING THE SUBJECT.
THIS WEEK IT WAS TO OBAMA GATE,
WHAT A SCANDAL.
ALREADY LOSING STEAM BECAUSE IT
LACKS THAT CRUCIAL INGREDIENT
THAT MOST SCANDALS NEED TO HAVE,
AN ALLEGATION.
TRUMP FAMINES ARE READY TO BE
ALL ANGRY AT THIS, BUT THEY
DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS.
EVEN GLENN BECK'S CHALKBOARD
SAYS "TO BE DETERMINED."
I GUESS THE BRIGHT SIDE OF THIS
IS ALL 50 STATES NOW OR AT LEAST
PARTIALLY OPEN BUT AGAIN, NO
PLAN.
NO CONSISTENCIES, IT'S THE
OPPOSITE OF AFGHANISTAN, WE HAVE
NO ENTRANCE STRATEGY.
THE THEME SEEMS TO BE YOU CAN GO
OUT BUT YOU CAN'T HAVE FUN.
WHAT MARRIED PEOPLE CALL DATE
NIGHT.
FOR EXAMPLE, CALIFORNIA HAS
REOPENED SOME PARKS, BEACHES,
HIKING TRAILS, BUT AGAIN, THE
INCONSISTENCIES -- YOU CAN WALK
ON THE BEACH BUT YOU CAN'T
CONGREGATE, AND YET THE
RESTROOMS ARE OPEN FOR GAY SEX.
HIKING IS BIG OUT HERE, PEOPLE
ARE ALWAYS GOING HIKING, YOU
KNOW WHAT HIKING IS, THAT'S WHEN
A GUY AND A GIRL WALK UP THE
MOUNTAIN BECAUSE SHE WANTS
EXERCISE AND HE THINKS IT'S A
DATE.
GEORGIA ONE OF THE FIRST STATES
TO REOPEN, AGAIN, INCONSISTENT.
YOU CAN GO TO THE WAFFLE HOUSE
TO EAT, BUT THE BAND REMAINS ON
PARKING LOT FISTFIGHTS.
IN GEORGIA AND IN TEXAS, THEY
OPEN THE CHURCHES AND THEN THEY
HAD TO RECLOSE THEM BECAUSE
PEOPLE THOUGHT THE DISEASE -- I
MAKE FUN OF RELIGION, BUT I
CAN'T BLAME PEOPLE FOR WANTING
TO GO TO CHURCH IN PERSON AND
HAVE THAT EXPERIENCE.
THERE'S JUST SOMETHING ABOUT
SPEAKING IN TONGUES OVER ZOOM
THAT MAKES YOU FEEL LIKE AN
IDIOT.
OKAY, WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW,
TONIGHT WE HAVE MICHAEL MOORE,
THOMAS FRIEDMAN, AND DR. CATE
SHANAHAN -
LET'S GET RIGHT TO IT.
HE'S THE PULITZER PRIZE WINNING
COLUMNIST FOR
"THE NEW YORK TIMES" AND AUTHOR
OF A BEST SELLER, THOMAS
FRIEDMAN IS WITH US FROM
NEW YORK --
>> ACTUALLY MARYLAND.
>> Bill: YOUR COLUMNS HAVE
BEEN FANTASTIC IN THESE HORRIBLE
TIMES, HORRIBLE TIMES, GREAT
COLUMNS.
WHEN I READ THEM, I CAN'T HELP
BUT THINK OF YOUR SEMINAL BOOK
"THE WORLD IS FLAT" AND HOW YOU
ARE THE GUY THAT IDENTIFIED THE
ISSUE THAT WE ARE ALL SO
INTERCONNECTED.
ORIGINALLY THAT WAS MORE ABOUT
ECONOMICS AND TECHNOLOGY, BUT
NOW WE SEE IT'S REALLY ABOUT
DISEASE TOO , RIGHT? >> YEAH.
BASICALLY, I'VE BEEN LOOKING
BACK AT THE LAST 20 YEARS AND
WHAT I REALIZED -- I'VE ACTUALLY
BEEN COVERING ONE PANDEMIC AFTER
ANOTHER, BUT OF A DIFFERENT
KIND.
FIRST I COVERED A GEOPOLITICAL
PANDEMIC CALLED 9/11, THEN I
COVERED A FINANCIAL PANDEMIC
CALLED 2008, NOW I'M COVERING A
BIOLOGICAL PANDEMIC CALLED
COVID-19, AND I'M PROBABLY ABOUT
TO COVER AN ATMOSPHERIC PANDEMIC
CALLED CLIMATE CHANGE.
THE REASON THESE ARE HAPPENING
MORE OFTEN IS ONE, THE WORLD IS
GETTING MORE TIGHTLY WOUND
TOGETHER THROUGH GLOBALIZATION,
TECHNOLOGY, AIR TRAVEL -- WHO
KNEW THAT THERE WERE 50 FLIGHTS
FROM WUHAN DIRECT TO AMERICA
BETWEEN DECEMBER AND MARCH?
AND AT THE SAME TIME, WE ARE
TAKING A LOT OF BUFFERS OUT OF
THINGS, GREATER REDUNDANCY,
STABILIZED SYSTEMS PROMOTE ULTRA
GREASED GREASED SUPPLY CHAINS,
DIVERSITY, AND WE ARE PUSHING
THINGS TO THE EXTREME.
JIHADI RADICALS PUSH THEM TO THE
EXTREME AROUND 9/11, BANKERS
PUSH THEM TO THE EXTREME AROUND
2008, WE PUSHED ECOSYSTEMS TO
THE EXTREME AND ENDED UP WITH
BATS IN DOMESTIC FOOD MARKETS,
WE PUSH THE CLAIMANT TO THE
EXTREME, AND HE PUT ALL THESE
TOGETHER AND THE WORLD ISN'T
JUST FLAT NOW, IT'S INCREASINGLY
FRAIL BY BEING SO TIGHTLY
TOGETHER AND AT THE SAME TIME,
PUSHING HIM OUT OF THINGS TO
THEIR LIMITS AND BEYOND.
>> Bill: I'M ALMOST AFRAID TO
ASK YOU ABOUT WHAT YOUR LEVEL OF
OPTIMISM IS GIVEN THAT
SITUATION -- I QUOTED YOU A
COUPLE WEEKS AGO ON OUR SHOW,
YOU SAID AMERICA HAS BEEN AS
DUMB AS WE WANT TO BE, THAT
BILLY HAS BEEN OUR POLICY AND
IT'S TRUE, NOT JUST OF
POLITICIANS BUT ALL OF US FOR A
VERY LONG TIME AND NOW IT'S
COMING HOME TO ROOST.
WHEN I READ THE PAPER EVERY DAY,
ALL I SEE IS GOD, COULD WE HAVE
FUCKED THIS UP ANY WORSE?
WE TRIED TO SAVE THE HOSPITAL SO
NOW ARE BANKRUPTING THEM.
TESTING, OTHER COUNTRIES SEEM TO
BE ABLE TO GET THAT, THE ONE LAB
TRUMP HAS IN TOUTING, 48% OF THE
TIME IT WORKS, YOU COULD FLIP A
COIN AND DO IT JUST AS WELL.
IF YOU HAD A PREGNANCY TEST,
HALF THE TIME WAS I GUESS THAT'S
WRONG, I AM PREGNANT, I DON'T
THINK WE'D BE USING THAT.
WE ARE JUST SO BAD, HOW DO YOU
EVEN BEGIN TO REVERSE THIS LEVEL
OF DYSFUNCTION?
>> A COUPLE THINGS ARE GOING
ON -- WE ARE REAPING WHAT WAS
SOWED, NOT ON YOUR SHOW BUT
ANOTHER NETWORK, WE'VE LOST OUR
COGNITIVE IMMUNITY.
THAT'S A TERM MY FRIEND CLAIMED,
WE'VE LOST OUR ABILITY TO SORT
FACT FROM FICTION AND ASSIGNS
FROM SCIENCE FICTION AND WE HAVE
A NETWORK THAT'S BEEN IN THE
BUSINESS OF MAKING PEOPLE ANGRY
AND STUPID AND AT THE SAME TIME
WE HAVE SOCIAL NETWORKS, WHETHER
IT'S FACEBOOK OR TWITTER OR
OTHERS -- THESE SOCIAL NETWORKS
ARE LIKE OPEN SEWERS.
UNTREATED, UNFILTERED
INFORMATION.
DIAMOND AND RUBIES AND GOLD AND
GEMS, TOXIC WASTE AND RUSTY CANS
AND BROKEN GLASS.
IF YOU DON'T HAVE A POPULATION
THAT HAS THE FILTERS TO SORT OUT
ONE FROM THE OTHER, YOU GET TO
WHERE WE ARE TODAY.
WE ARE CAUGHT BETWEEN WHAT I
CALL BREAKING NEWS AND PRESIDENT
BREAKING BAD.
ASSAULTED WITH BREAKING NEWS, 24
KIDS IN NEW YORK CITY HAVE
ACQUIRED INFLAMMATORY DISEASE
POST COVID-19, BUT IT'S NOT PUT
IN ANY CONTEXT.
IS THAT 1 OUT OF 100000, IS THAT
ONE OUT OF A THOUSAND?
WHEN YOU'RE CONSTANTLY POUNDED
WITH THESE BREAKING NEWS STORIES
IT'S HARD TO FIND YOUR BALANCE.
AT THE SAME TIME, YOU HAVE A
PRESIDENT OUT THERE WHO
BASICALLY IS TOUTING ULTRAVIOLET
LIGHT COLONOSCOPIES AND LYSOL
ENEMAS OR HYDROCHLORIC WHEN THAT
HAS BEEN REJECTED BY HIS OWN FDA
FDA.
BETWEEN THE TWO, IT HAS BECOME
VERY HARD FOR THE AVERAGE
CITIZEN TO WEIGH THE RISKS --
WONDER WHY GO OUT, WHEN DO I NOT
GO OUT, DO I SEND MY KIDS BACK
TO SCHOOL?
NO ONE IS SHAPING THE
CONVERSATION AT THE TOP OF THE
WAY A REAL PRESIDENT WOULD BE
DOING IN SUCH A CRISIS.
OTHER LEADERS AROUND THE WORLD
HAVE BEEN.
>> Bill: I'M GLAD YOU
MENTIONED BOTH SIDES.
TRUMP -- WE ARE STRAIGHT UP
GOING TO MAD KING, YOU HAVE A
MAD KING, WE HAVE THAT NOW
DURING A PANDEMIC.
BUT IT'S NOT LIKE THE OTHER SIDE
HAS ALL GOOD INFORMATION EITHER.
YOU WROTE THIS AND I'M GLAD YOU
DID -- YOU'RE QUOTING
MOTHER NATURE AND YOU SAID
MOTHER NATURE SAYS YOU NEED TO
GET BACK IN BALANCE AND THAT
STARTS WITH USING THE IMMUNE
SYSTEM THAT I ENDOWED YOU WITH.
THAT'S ACTUALLY A CONTROVERSIAL
STATEMENT IN A LOT OF QUARTERS.
WE ARE SO LOCKED INTO THIS
PHARMACEUTICAL MEDICAL
ESTABLISHMENT ADD FOOD INDUSTRY
COMPLEX THAT WE SEEM TO HAVE
FORGOTTEN ABOUT -- THAT'S THE
WAY OUT OF THIS IS USING OUR
IMMUNE SYSTEM BUT NOT EVERYONE
WANTS TO HEAR THAT.
>> HISTORICALLY, THAT'S HOW
PEOPLE OVERCAME PANDEMICS,
THROUGH HERD IMMUNITY, 60-70% OF
THE POPULATION GOT IT AND THE
VIRUS RUNS OUT OF PEOPLE TO
INFECT.
BASICALLY YOU GET HURT IMMUNITY
AND YOU GET THROUGH IT
NATURALLY.
I'VE BEEN WRITING ABOUT SWEDEN
FROM THE VERY BEGINNING, I DON'T
KNOW IF THEY'VE GOT THE
ANSWER -- THE SWEDES DON'T EVEN
KNOW IF THEY HAVE THE ANSWER BUT
THEY'VE DECIDED TO TAKE AN
EXPERIMENT THAT SAYS HOW IS THE
BEST WAY FOR US TO MAXIMALLY
SAVE LIVES AND LIVELIHOODS AND
THEY THOUGHT IT WAS TO KEEP
THEIR ECONOMY PARTIALLY OPEN,
CONTINUE TO SOCIAL DISTANCE, LET
CAK-9 SCHOOLS GO, LET THAT PORTN
OF THE POPULATION THAT IS
HEALTHY THAT WILL LIKELY
EXPERIENCE THIS DISEASE A
SYMPTOMATICALLY, WILL NOT
REQUIRE HOSPITALIZATION, BUILD
THE ANTIBODIES, AND BECOME
IMMUNE ON THE HOPE AND
ASSUMPTION THAT WILL PROVIDE
THEM A PERIOD OF IMMUNITY FOR
IT.
IT'S NOT FOR SURE BUT IT'S WHAT
THEY ARE ANTICIPATING.
THE SWEDES BELIEVE THEY GOT 30%
OF THEIR POPULATION IN STOCKHOLM
AND THEIR HEALTH WORKERS WHO
ALREADY HAVE HERD IMMUNITY.
IF I DON'T KNOW IF THEY'RE GOING
TO MAKE IT, THEY DIDN'T DO WELL
PROTECTING THEIR NURSING HOMES,
THEY WOULD BE THE FIRST TO ADMIT
THEY LOST MORE PEOPLE THAN THEY
WANTED, BUT WHAT HAS ANNOYED ME
TO NO END -- THE NUMBER OF
PEOPLE IF YOU READ THE ARTICLES
ABOUT SWEDEN WHO ARE ROOTING FOR
THEM TO FAIL AND ARE ALREADY
JUDGING IT AS A FAILURE BECAUSE
THEY MAY HAVE LOST MORE PEOPLE
NOW RELATIVE TO DENMARK BUT NOT
RELATIVE TO OTHER COUNTRIES AND
I'M ROOTING FOR THEM TO
SUCCEED -- I DON'T KNOW IF THEY
WILL BUT IF THEY CAN SHOW US A
DIFFERENT PATHWAY HERE TO
MAXIMALLY SAVE LIVES AND
LIVELIHOODS, GOD BLESS THEM.
>> Bill: AND IF I MAY,
HISTORICALLY, WHAT WE'RE DOING
NOW WITH THE TOTAL LOCKDOWN,
THAT'S THE EXPERIMENT.
WHAT SWEDEN IS DOING IS MORE OF
WHAT SOCIETIES INCLUDING OUR OWN
HAVE DONE IN ALL PAST PANDEMICS,
THAT'S THE EXPERIMENT, WHAT
WE'RE DOING IS MORE THE
EXPERIMENT.
LET ME TELL YOU NOW THAT WE ARE
OPENING UP AGAIN, SWEDEN'S STATE
EPIDEMIOLOGIST SAID SOMETHING I
DON'T THINK WE THOUGHT OF -- HE
SAID ONCE YOU GET INTO A
LOCKDOWN, IT'S DIFFICULT TO GET
OUT OF IT.
THAT'S AN INTERESTING POINT.
NOW THAT WE HAVE SCARED THE SHIT
OUT OF PEOPLE AND THEY ARE
AFRAID TO GO OUT, EVEN IF
BUSINESSES DO OPEN, ARE THEY
GOING TO PATRONIZE THEM?
WHEN YOU GET PEOPLE SITTING HOME
FOR THREE MONTHS, WHAT SORT OF
NEW HABITS DO THEY HAVE?
DO THEY LOOK AT EVERY HUMAN
BEING FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIFE
LIKE A LEPER, IS EVERYONE GOING
TO TURN INTO HOWIE MANDEL AND
HAVE THIS GERMAN PHOBIC DISEASE?
I THINK THAT'S AN INTERESTING
POINT, ONCE YOU GET INTO IT,
IT'S LIKE A WAR.
EASY TO MARCH IN, HARD TO MARCH
OUT.
>> THE REASON WE HAD TO DO THAT
IS BECAUSE TRUMP, THE LEADERSHIP
WAS SLOW TO REACT.
IF WE FACED A DECISION IF WE
DIDN'T LOCKDOWN THE HOSPITALS
WOULD HAVE BEEN OVERWHELMED.
THE PROBLEM WITH LOCKDOWNS IS
ALL THEY DO IS EXHAUST YOU, THEY
DO NOTHING VIS-A-VIS THE VIRUS.
THEY SPREAD OUT THE TIME OF
INFECTION AND HOPEFULLY MAKE IT
SO IT DOESN'T OVERWHELM YOUR
HOSPITAL SYSTEM.
I WROTE QUOTING DR. DAVID KATZ,
THE IDEA SHOULD HAVE BEEN LOCKED
DOWN FOR A VERY SET PERIOD OF
TIME, THEN ON A RISK STRATIFIED
BASIS, RELEASE INTO THE
WORKFORCE PEOPLE WHO WERE LIKELY
TO EXPERIENCE THIS DISEASE A
SYMPTOMATICALLY OR AS A MILD
FLU, PROTECT THE MOST
VULNERABLE, BUILD HERD IMMUNITY
AND THEN THE SOUND THE ALL CLEAR
ONCE YOU HAVE HERD IMMUNITY.
WE NEVER HAD THAT CONVERSATION,
ONE REASON WE DIDN'T WAS IN
ENGLAND, BORIS JOHNSON WANTED TO
DO THAT BUT A STUDY BY IMPERIAL
COLLEGE THAT PREDICTED MASSIVE
NUMBERS OF DEATHS FREAKED HIM
OUT, THEY ENDED UP WITH LOCKING
DOWN, AND NOW WHAT THEY'VE DONE,
WE'VE IS EX EXHAUSTED EVERYBODYD
NOW WE FACE A SECOND WAVE DOWN
THE ROAD AS EVERYONE WANTS TO GO
TO THE BAR AND MIXED TOGETHER
AGAIN.
>> Bill: WHAT DO WE DO IF
THERE IS A SECOND WAVE?
SOUTH KOREA WAS VERY TOUGH WITH
TRACING, TESTING, THEY DID IT
ALL GREAT AND THEY DID HAVE A
SECOND WAVE.
IT SHOWED EVEN THAT DIDN'T
REALLY WORK.
NOW THAT WE HAVE DECIMATED SO
MANY INDUSTRIES, HOSPITALS AND
COLLEGES AND RESTAURANTS, RETAIL
COMMERCIAL BUSINESS -- I DON'T
KNOW HOW MANY BUSINESSES YOU CAN
DESTROY AT ONCE.
YOU CAN KEEP PUTTING PEOPLE INTO
A LIFEBOAT BUT EVENTUALLY THAT
MAKES THE LIFEBOAT SINK.
WHAT HAPPENS IF THERE IS A
SECOND WAVE IN THE FALL?
WHAT DO YOU THINK WE SHOULD DO?
>> I THINK WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN
BY DEFAULT IS THAT BASICALLY
TRUMP HAS TALKED LIKE WE ARE
BEING CHINA -- TESTING, TRACING,
WE'RE ACTUALLY ACTING LIKE WE'RE
GOING TO BE SWEDEN AND GO OVER
HERD IMMUNITY.
WERE PREPARING TO DO NEITHER AND
WERE TALKING LIKE WE ARE
SUPERIOR TO BOTH.
THE RUBBER WILL MEET THE ROAD IN
THE FALL IF THERE IS A SECOND
WAVE AND WHEN YOU LISTEN TO
DR. FAUCI, HE'S BASICALLY SAID
THERE WILL BE A SECOND WAVE AND
WHEN YOU LOOK AT PEOPLE AND THIS
HAS BEEN MY ARGUMENT -- I SO
UNDERSTAND THE NEED FOR PEOPLE
TO SAVE LIVELIHOODS AS WELL AS
LIVES.
I UNDERSTAND PEOPLE WANT TO COME
OUT NOW AND THEY WANT TO MIX AND
THE REASON I WROTE THAT
MOTHER NATURE COLUMN IS BE
SMART, RESPECT MOTHER NATURE.
GO OUT BUT DON'T GO INTO CROWDS,
CONTINUE TO WEAR A MASK,
CONTINUE TO SOCIALLY DISTANCE.
PLAY THE ODDS, REDUCE THE
CHANCES THAT YOU WILL GET THIS
DISEASE SYMPTOMATICALLY OR A
SYMPTOMATICALLY AND PASS IT ON
TO SOMEONE ELSE.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF
IT COMES BACK IN THE FALL, I
THINK IF THAT HAPPENS, WE'RE
PROBABLY JUST GOING TO THROW UP
OUR HANDS AND GO FOR HERD
IMMUNITY, HOPEFULLY PROTECT THE
VULNERABLE AND HOPEFULLY NOT
OVERWHELM OUR HOSPITAL SYSTEMS.
>> Bill: I'LL ADD ONE MORE
THING, GET YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM IN
BETTER SHAPE.
IT'S WITHIN PEOPLE'S ABILITY TO
DO THAT WHICH IS WHAT I'M GOING
TO TALK ABOUT WITH MY NEXT
GUEST.
ALWAYS GREAT TO SEE YOU, ALWAYS
GREAT TO READ YOU, THANK YOU FOR
DOING WHAT YOU DO AND I HOPE TO
SEE YOU IN PERSON SOON.
TAKE CARE.
>> Bill: MY NEXT GUEST IS A
FAMILY PHYSICIAN AND
BEST-SELLING AUTHOR OF THE FAT
BURN FIX, PLEASE WELCOME
DR. CATE SHANAHAN.
I'M GOING TO START OUT WITH WHAT
WE HAVE IN COMMON.
CORNELL?
>> I STUDIED BIOCHEMISTRY THERE.
>> Bill: I WAS IN THE CANNABIS
CULTIVATION PROGRAM IN THE
UNDERGRAD SCHOOL.
THE OTHER THING WE HAVE IN
COMMON I THINK IS FOOD AND
THINKING THAT FOOD IS VERY
IMPORTANT TO YOUR HEALTH AND
THINKING THAT AMERICA DOESN'T
MENTION THAT ENOUGH.
I KNOW YOU WERE THE NUTRITIONIST
FOR THE LAKERS, RIGHT?
>> YES.
>> Bill: I READ IN SEVERAL
SOURCES THAT ONLY 12% OF
AMERICANS ARE METABOLICALLY
HEALTHY.
SINCE THAT IS YOUR AREA OF
EXPERTISE, DIET AND METABOLIC
HEALTH, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN TO
BE METABOLICALLY HEALTHY?
>> SO THERE ISN'T EVEN A
STANDARD DEFINITION FOR
METABOLISM IN THE MEDICAL
EDUCATION.
I SAY THIS JUST TO GIVE YOU AN
IDEA OF HOW FAR WE ARE FROM
RECOGNIZING WHAT THE CONNECTION
BETWEEN DIET AND HEALTH, BECAUSE
METABOLISM IS THAT CONNECTION.
WHEN PEOPLE ARE METABOLICALLY
HEALTHY, WE KIND OF GENERALLY
UNDERSTAND IT AS YOU DON'T HAVE
DIABETES AND YOU ARE NORMAL
WEIGHT.
THAT'S A GOOD START.
WE ACTUALLY DON'T REALLY DEFINE
HEALTH IN THIS COUNTRY, SO WE
DON'T DEFINE METABOLIC HEALTH.
WE DO DEFINE METABOLIC DISEASE
AND WE'VE GOT A FEW COMMON
FAMILIAR DISEASES.
EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT DIABETES
AND OBESITY ARE ASSOCIATED WITH
DIET AND HAVE SOMETHING TO DO
WITH METABOLISM, BUT IT TURNS
OUT THAT THE IMMUNE SYSTEM
HUGELY HAS TO DO -- THE HEALTH
OF YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM AND THE
ABILITY OF YOUR BODY TO FIGHT
OFF VIRUSES LIKE THE CORONAVIRUS
HAS TO DO HUGELY WITH YOUR
METABOLISM.
BECAUSE YOUR METABOLISM
DETERMINES WHETHER OR NOT --
WHETHER OR NOT YOU ARE BURNING
OR USING ENERGY EFFICIENTLY.
WHETHER OR NOT YOUR BODY FAT IS
THE PRIMARY SOURCE OF FUEL FOR
YOUR BODY.
>> Bill: WE ARE RUNNING YOUR
BODIES ON THE WRONG FEEL IS THE
ESSENCE OF IT, NO SUGAR -- THE
FIRST THING I SAID WHEN THE
CRISIS HAPPENED, STOP EATING
SUGAR, NO ONE LISTEN TO ME.
>> THERE'S A LOT OF DOCTORS WHO
AGREE WITH THAT 100%, WE ARE
STILL BEATING THAT DRUM.
THE OTHER FUEL THAT IS THE WRONG
FUEL IS THE KIND OF FAT THAT WE
HAVE IN OUR BODY FAT AND THAT'S
SOMETHING NOT ENOUGH PEOPLE ARE
AWARE OF AND ALMOST NOBODY IS
TALKING ABOUT.
WHEN I SAY THE KIND OF FACT, I'M
TALKING ABOUT -- WHERE DO YOUR
FATS COME FROM?
AND IT TURNS OUT THAT IN THIS
COUNTRY OVER THE PAST SEVERAL
GENERATIONS, WE'VE BEEN EATING
MORE AND MORE FACTORY PRODUCED
SEED OILS AND ALMOST COMPLETELY
CUTTING OUT THE WHOLE FAT-BASED
FOODS, THE ANIMAL FOODS.
WHEN YOU GO TO A GROCERY STORE
THESE DAYS AND YOU TRY TO BUY
REGULAR HAMBURGER, MOST OF IT IS
95% LIEN.
THERE'S NOT VERY MUCH RED MEAT
THAT HASN'T BEEN TRIMMED OF FAT.
MOST OF IT IN MOST OF WHAT
PEOPLE KNOW HOW TO COOK HIS
BONELESS-SKINLESS.
MANY DAIRY PRODUCTS LIKE YOGURT
ARE FAT FREE, YOU'D BE
HARD-PRESSED TO FIND A FLAVORED
YOGURT THAT ISN'T FAT-FREE OR
LOW-FAT WITH A NORMAL AMOUNT OF
FAT IN IT.
WE'VE TAKEN ALL THIS FAT THAT
WAS PART OF FOOD OUT OF OUR
DIET, AND WE AREN'T EATING ANY
LESS FAT, WE ARE EATING ABOUT
THE SAME AMOUNT OF FAT WHICH IS
BETWEEN 30 AND 50% OF MOST
PEOPLE'S DIETS.
>> Bill: FAT IS NOT BAD -- LET
ME STOP YOU THERE.
I THINK PEOPLE THINK OF FAT
EQUALS I GET FAT.
FAT IS NOT WHAT MAKE YOU FAT --
SUGAR AND CARBS MAKE YOU FAT.
PEOPLE HEAR ABOUT THE KETOGENIC
DIET, THAT MEANS RUN YOUR BODY
ON FAT.
FAT IS THE MOST EFFICIENT FUEL
TO RUN YOUR BODY ON.
YOU'RE SAYING WE ARE EATING THE
WRONG KINDS, WE ARE TALKING
ABOUT CANOLA OIL, CORN OIL, SOY
OIL, SUNFLOWER OIL, THINGS THAT
THEY DIDN'T HAVE 50, 100 YEARS
AGO AND WE ARE CONDUCTING THIS
MASSIVE EXPERIMENT RUNNING OUR
BODY ON THE WRONG FUEL.
>> IT TRULY IS AN EXPERIMENT AND
NO ONE KNOWS THEY'VE BEEN
PARTICIPATING IN IT, THAT'S THE
BIG PROBLEM.
THAT'S WHY I TELL PEOPLE FOR THE
COMPANY I WORKED FOR, I'VE BEEN
TELLING PEOPLE THAT THE BEST
THING YOU CAN DO TO BOOST YOUR
IMMUNE SYSTEM IS TO STOP EATING
THESE SEED OILS.
WHEN I FIRST STARTED WORKING
HERE, NOBODY KNEW WHAT SEED OILS
ARE BUT I'VE GOT PEOPLE TRAINED
NOW.
THERE'S EIGHT OF THEM, I CALLED
HIM A HATEFUL EIGHT.
IT'S HARD TO MEMORIZE THEM BUT I
HAVE RESOURCES ON MY WEBSITE TO
MAKE IT EASY WHEN YOU'RE
SHOPPING TO AVOID THESE THINGS.
>> Bill: I JUST MENTION THE
TOP FOUR.
WHAT PEOPLE HAVE TO UNDERSTAND
IS THERE IN EVERYTHING, JUST
LIKE SUGAR IS IN EVERYTHING.
JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT EATING
CAKE DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE NOT
GETTING TONS OF SUGAR, IT'S AN
SALAD DRESSING, IT'S AND CATCH
UP, IT'S IN EVERYTHING.
SO ARE THESE OILS YOU'RE TALKING
ABOUT.
I THINK WOULD HAVE TO PEOPLE
UNDERSTAND IS -- I KNOW THEY
HATE TO HEAR THIS -- JUNK FOOD
IS NOT JUST THE JUNK FOOD THAT
WE ALL THINK OF AS JUNK FOOD,
THE SUPERMARKET IS MOSTLY SHIT.
IT'S MOSTLY SHIT THAT'S NOT
MAKING YOU HEALTHY, I KNOW IT
SOUNDS ELITIST BECAUSE NOT
EVERYONE CAN GO TO WHOLE FOODS.
>> YOU'RE NOT SAFE AT WHOLE
FOODS, A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK
WHOLE FOODS IS LOOKING OUT FOR
THEM BUT IF YOU LOOK AT THE
SALAD DRESSINGS AT WHOLE FOODS,
YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A HARD TIME
FINDING ONE THAT ACTUALLY HAS
ALL OF OIL, EVEN ONES THAT SAY
ON THE FRONT MADE WITH ALL OF
OIL, WHEN YOU TURN IT AROUND,
IT'S LISTED AFTER SOY OR CANOLA
OR ONE OF THE OTHER HATEFUL
EIGHT VEGETABLE OILS.
>> Bill: THIS IS VERY
IMPORTANT I THINK, WE HAVE TO IN
ORDER TO GET THIS COUNTRY BACK
MOVING AGAIN, END THE FEAR AND
THE FEAR IS NOT GOING TO GO AWAY
BECAUSE THE MEDIA LOVES FEAR AND
THEY ARE ALWAYS FINDING -- I'M
NOT SAYING IT DOESN'T HAPPEN,
THEY ARE FINDING YOUNGER PEOPLE,
PEOPLE UNDER 40 WHO DIE FROM
CORONAVIRUS AND THEY DO.
CORONAVIRUS WHICH OFTEN BRINGS
ON SOMETHING ELSE, I KNOW YOU'RE
GOING TO TALK ABOUT THAT.
YOU'RE WILLING TO STAKE YOUR
REPUTATION THAT ANYONE WHO IS OF
THE YOUNGER SET WHO HAS DIED OF
THIS, IT'S NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE
UNLUCKY.
I THINK WE HAVE THIS IDEA THAT
YOU MIGHT GET STRUCK BY
LIGHTNING -- THE WAY YOU WOULD
GET STRUCK BY LIGHTNING AND YOU
ARE SAYING NO, ANYONE WHO DIES
FROM THIS WHO IS NOT A VERY
ELDERLY PERSON, IT'S BECAUSE
THEY ARE METABOLICALLY
UNHEALTHY, BECAUSE THEY DON'T
EVEN REALIZE IT.
MAYBE THEY ARE NOT OBESE, YOU'RE
SAYING YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE
OBESE OR HAVE DIABETES TO HAVE
THIS SORT OF METABOLIC HEALTH,
COULD YOU EXPLAIN THAT?
>> WHAT'S GOING ON IS THE VIRUS
ITSELF IS NOT ACTUALLY WHAT'S
KILLING THE YOUNGER PEOPLE.
WHAT'S KILLING THE YOUNGER
PEOPLE IS THE INFLAMMATION THAT
COMES WHEN YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM
TRIES TO GET RID OF THE VIRUS
BUT YOUR BODY FAT HAS BEEN
SATURATED WITH THESE HIGHLY
UNSTABLE FATTY ACIDS THAT COME
FROM EATING ALL THESE SEED OILS.
THAT'S WHAT I WOULD STAKE MY
REPUTATION ON.
YOU SHOW ME ONE PERSON WHO'S
BEEN AVOIDING THESE SEED OILS
FOR FIVE YEARS, ONE PERSON UNDER
60 WHO'S HAD A SERIOUS CASE OF
CORONA, WHERE THEY WERE IN THE
ICU OR THEY DIED.
BECAUSE I DON'T THINK THERE IS
ONE.
WHAT I'M SAYING IS THAT THE
UNDERLYING CONDITIONS, WE'VE GOT
A FEW OF THEM NAILED.
DIABETES AND FATTY LIVER AND
PREDIABETES, MOST OF THE PEOPLE
WHO ARE IN THE MEDIA AND SAYING
"I'M HEALTHY, I DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHY I GOT SO SICK WITH THIS
THING," THEY EITHER HAVE
PREDIABETES THAT HASN'T BEEN
DIAGNOSED, MORE THAN HALF THE
PEOPLE WITH PREDIABETES AREN'T
TOLD BY THEIR DOCTOR OR THEY
MIGHT HAVE FATTY LIVER BUT THE
UNDERLYING CONDITION THAT
UNDERLIES ALL OF THESE
CONDITIONS, INCLUDING
HYPERTENSION, INCLUDING
HEARTBURN IS HAVING BODY FAT
THAT'S SATURATED WITH THESE
UNSTABLE INFLAMMATION PRONE
FATTY ACIDS FROM SEED OILS.
WE ARE LIVING ON THEM AND THEY
BUILD UP OVER YEARS IN OUR BODY
FAT AND MAKE IT INCREASINGLY
HYPER INFLAMMATORY.
>> Bill: WE OFTEN DEMONIZE --
HEALTH IS VERY TRENDY, I DON'T
KNOW IF PEOPLE THINK OF IT THAT
WAY BUT IT IS, IT'S WORSE THAN
THE CLOTHING INDUSTRY SOMETIMES.
IF WE WERE DOING THIS SHOW IN
THE 80s IT WOULD BE ALL ABOUT
TO GET AS MUCH CARBS IN YOU AS
YOU CAN.
15 YEARS AGO, THEY WERE SAYING
TRANS FATS ARE WHAT WE SHOULD
EAT, THAT'S MARGARINE.
NOW THEY SAY, THOSE ARE THE
WORST KIND.
THIS IS T WHAT YOU'RE SAYING.
IF THEY THE SUN, YOU NEED SON,
IT'S NOT EVIL, NOT TOO MUCH.
GERMS THEMSELVES, IT'S NATURAL
TO ENCOUNTER GERMS, YOU ACTUALLY
NEED TO.
CHOLESTEROL, THAT'S ONE OF YOUR
BIG ISSUES.
WE ACTUALLY SOMETIMES HAVE TWO
LOW CHOLESTEROL, SOMEBODY GOT IT
IN THEIR HEAD THAT WE HAVE TO
GET RID OF ALL CHOLESTEROL.
WHAT IS CHOLESTEROL?
IT'S ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT
THINGS IN THE BODY, IS IT NOT?
>> CHOLESTEROL AS A STABILIZER
MOLECULE THAT HELPS EVERY SINGLE
ONE OF YOUR MEMBRANES DO ITS JOB
JOB.
CHOLESTEROL IS A BUILDING BLOCK
FOR IMPORTANT HORMONES LIKE
CORTISOL AND TESTOSTERONE AND
ESTROGEN AND YOUR BRAIN IS
LOADED WITH CHOLESTEROL.
ONE OF THE INTERESTING THINGS
THAT THEY'VE ALREADY DISCOVERED
IN WUHAN WHERE THEY ARE DOING A
LOT MORE RESEARCH ON PREDICTING
WHO IS REALLY GONNA GET SICK
FROM CORONAVIRUS, THEY FOUND
THAT THE PEOPLE WHO WERE
HOSPITALIZED HAD VERY LOW
CHOLESTEROL LEVELS.
AND THE PEOPLE WHO DIED WERE
MORE LIKELY TO HAVE THEIR
CHOLESTEROL LEVELS ACTUALLY DROP
WHILE THEY WERE TRYING TO FIGHT
OFF THE INFECTION AND THE PEOPLE
WHO SURVIVED WERE ABLE TO BRING
THEIR CHOLESTEROL LEVELS BACK UP
TO NORMAL.
THE CONNECTION BETWEEN
CHOLESTEROL AND A SEED OILS IS
THAT THE SEED OILS ACTUALLY WILL
DROP YOUR CHOLESTEROL LEVEL AND
NOBODY REALLY KNOWS EXACTLY WHY
OR HOW IT HAPPENS BUT IT HAS
BEEN KNOWN FOR DECADES AND IN
FACT THAT'S WHY DOCTORS
RECOMMEND THEM SOMETIMES.
WE HAVE THIS PERVASIVE
RIDICULOUS FEAR OF CHOLESTEROL,
WHICH IS SOMETHING THAT EVERY
SINGLE CELL IN OUR BODY NEEDS
AND ITS INMOST FOODS THAT ARE OF
ANIMAL ORIGIN.
SUDDENLY WE HAVE TO DROP OUR
CHOLESTEROL BY EATING FATS THAT
CAME FROM SEEDS AND THE ONLY WAY
WE CAN EXTRACT THEM FROM SEEDS
IS BY EXTREMELY HARSH PROCESSING
IN A FACTORY WHICH GENERATES
TOXINS THAT SIT THERE IN THE
BOTTLE WHILE IT'S ON THE SHELF.
AND THEN YOU EAT THEM AND THEY
ARE SO TOXIC THAT THEY DISTORT
YOUR NORMAL MICROBIAL FLORA.
THESE SEED OILS MAKE YOU MORE
SUSCEPTIBLE TO INFECTION IN
NUMEROUS WAYS, STARTING WITH
WHERE THEY ENTER YOUR BODY.
THEY DISTORT THE MICROFLORA SO
WE HAVE MORE OF THE PATHOGENIC
TYPE OF BACTERIA AND FEWER OF
THE GOOD TYPE OF BACTERIA THAT
ACTUALLY DO PLAY A ROLE IN
FENDING OFF VIRUSES, IT SEEMS.
>> Bill: I GUESS THE BOTTOM
LINE IS TRY TO EAT REAL FOOD.
I KNOW IT'S HARD IN THIS
COUNTRY, WE STACK THE DECK
AGAINST PEOPLE, WE DON'T
SUBSIDIZE THE RIGHT THINGS, WE
DON'T SEEM TO CARE.
THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE THE CURE IS
FOR THE BAD FOOD, THEY ARE HAPPY
ABOUT IT TOO, THE PHARMACEUTICAL
INDUSTRY, BUT WE WON'T GO INTO
THAT, WE GOT TO GO.
I APPRECIATE YOU COMING ON AND
EXPLAINING THIS TO US AND I HOPE
PEOPLE OUT THERE EAT REAL FOOD,
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
>> ONE THING WE CAN DO THAT'S A
POSITIVE FROM ALL OF THIS IS IF
WE DO CHANGE OUR DIETS, THIS
HORRIBLE CORONAVIRUS MAKES US
FINALLY TAKE OUR DIET SERIOUSLY.
>> Bill: THANK YOU SO MUCH,
TAKE CARE.
SO I SAW AN ARTICLE RECENTLY
THAT I THOUGHT WAS RIDICULOUS
BECAUSE IT WAS ABOUT HOW WE
HAVEN'T HAD ANY SCHOOL SHOOTINGS
IN THE LAST TWO MONTHS.
YEAH, BECAUSE THERE'S NOBODY IN
SCHOOL.
L.A. IS BOASTING WITH PRIDE
ABOUT HOW OUR AIR QUALITY IS
BETTER THAN EVER, IN NEW YORK,
THERE HASN'T BEEN A PEDESTRIAN
DEATH IN 58 DAYS, BECAUSE NO ONE
IS OUT.
SO I ASKED THE STAFF TO COMB
LOCAL PAPERS TO SEE WHAT OTHER
MUNICIPALITIES ARE SAYING ABOUT
WHAT THEY ARE PROUD OF, WOULD
YOU LIKE TO HEAR SOME?
I'M SURE YOU DO.
FOR EXAMPLE.
TALLAHASSEE: 46 DAYS WITHOUT
SOMEONE ON BATH SALTS TRYING TO
FUCK AN ALLIGATOR.
IMPRESSIVE.
NEW ORLEANS: 24 DAYS WITHOUT A
TOPLESS CHICK FALLING OFF OF A
BALCONY.
MISSISSIPPI: 28 DAYS WITHOUT
SOMEONE HOOKING UP AT THEIR
FAMILY REUNION.
SEATTLE: 45 DAYS SINCE SOMEONE
IN A PRIUS RAN OVER SOMEONE ON A
SCOOTER.
SEATTLE.
FIRE ISLAND: 16 DAYS WITHOUT
SOMEONE IN AN EMERGENCY ROOM
SAYING "I MUST HAVE SAT ON IT."
I'M GOING TO WAIT AN EXTRA BEAT
THAT LAUGH AT HOME.
IN VENICE BEACH, RIGHT HERE IN
CALIFORNIA.
52 DAYS WITHOUT A FIGHT BETWEEN
A DEADBEAT WITH A LIZARD AND A
DEADBEAT WITH A PARROT.
SALT LAKE CITY: 61 DAYS SINCE A
MORMON GOT HIS NECKTIE CAUGHT IN
A BICYCLE.
JERSEY SHORE: 60 DAYS WITHOUT A
FIGHT OVER WHAT SOMEONE WAS
LOOKING AT.
IN SAN FRANCISCO IT'S BEEN A
RECORD FIVE WEEKS SINCE A CHILD
HAS ASKED, "MOMMY, WHY DOES THAT
LADY HAVE A BEARD?"
OKLAHOMA: 34 DAYS SINCE SOMEONE
TRIED TO KILL A SPIDER WITH A
BLOWTORCH.
TAMPA: 48 DAYS WITHOUT A JUNIOR
HIGH SCHOOL KID GETTING BLOWN BY
HIS TEACHER IN A MINIVAN.
OKAY, YOU KNOW HIM, HE'S THE
ACADEMY AWARD-WINNING FILMMAKER
AND A HOST OF THE PODCAST RUMBLE
WITH MICHAEL MOORE, MY GOOD
FRIEND, THE ICON MICHAEL MOORE.
HOW ARE YOU, ARE YOU IN THAT
DEPARTMENT OF YOURS I KNOW SO
WELL?
>> I AM IN THIS NEW YORK CITY
APARTMENT, IT'S ON TOP OF A
MOVIE THEATER.
IT'S CLOSED SO I CAN'T GO SEE
ANY MOVIES.
>> Bill: OF COURSE, WHAT
ISN'T?
I HOPE YOU'RE GETTING OUT A
LITTLE.
>> I'VE GOTTEN OUT A LITTLE BIT
BUT I'VE BEEN CONFINED -- THIS
IS DAY -- I DON'T KNOW, DAY 60 I
THINK?
>> Bill: I DON'T KNOW WHAT DAY
IT IS.
>> I'M LUCKY, I HAVE A NARROW
DECK OUTSIDE THE WINDOW, SO I'VE
BEEN GOING OUT THERE AND WALKING
A MILE OR TWO EVERY DAY.
IT LOOKS I'M SURE RIDICULOUS TO
THE APARTMENTS ACROSS THE STREET
OR WHATEVER THAT THERE IS THIS
GUY JUST WALKING BACK AND FORTH
FOR NO REASON.
WHO IS THAT MOB GUY IN THE
VILLAGE -- REMEMBER HE WALKED
AROUND IN HIS BATHROBE?
THAT'S ALL THAT'S MISSING, CRAZY
GUY ON MY DECK.
>> Bill: I WANTED TO ASK YOU
ABOUT THE POLITICS OF THIS STATE
WE'RE IN RIGHT NOW BECAUSE
THERE'S A NEW POLL THAT CAME OUT
TODAY THAT SAID BIDEN LEADING
TRUMP NATIONALLY AND BY 11 BUT
CNN REPORTED LAST WEEK THAT HE
WAS ACTUALLY LOSING IN THE
BATTLEGROUND STATES THAT WILL
DETERMINE THE ELECTION.
I THOUGHT THIS WAS AN
INTERESTING DEMOGRAPHIC, BIDEN
IS KILLING TRUMP IN THE
DEMOGRAPHIC OF PEOPLE WHO HATE
THEM BOTH, I'M NOT KIDDING ABOUT
THAT.
THAT'S THE KIND OF ENTHUSIASM WE
NEED.
SOMEONE LIKE ME WHO THE LAST
TIME OUT WORRIED THAT TRUMP
WOULD WIN AND YOU PREDICTED HE
WOULD, WHAT'S YOUR CRYSTAL BALL
SAYING NOW?
I WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT A
PRESIDENT WHO HANDLED THIS
CRISIS THE WAY TRUMP HAD WOULD
BE IN THE TEENS AND HE'S IN THE
MID-40s.
>> HE'S GOING TO DO WELL, HE
HASN'T LOST ANY OF HIS SUPPORT.
HE WILL DO WELL AND NONE OF US
SHOULD TAKE IT FOR GRANTED.
WE NEED TO BEHAVE AS IF HE WILL
WIN A SECOND TERM.
ANYBODY WHO RIGHT NOW JUST WENT
OH, NO!
YOU'RE PART OF THE PROBLEM,
BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT TAKING THIS
SERIOUSLY.
HE KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT HE'S
DOING, HE WAS IN MICHIGAN THIS
WEEK, IT'S THE THIRD TIME HE'S
BEEN IN MICHIGAN IN THREE WEEKS.
HE BELIEVES THAT HE'S GOING TO
SOMEHOW PULL THIS OFF.
THE POLES YOU CITED, VERY
SIMILAR TO FOUR YEARS AGO.
HILLARY WAS DECENTLY IF NOT WELL
AHEAD OF TRUMP, BUT THE POLLS
ALSO SHOWED THAT SHE WAS DOING
WELL IN THOSE BATTLEGROUND
STATES.
WHAT I THINK THIS MEANS THIS
TIME IS WE HAVE THE POSSIBILITY
OF WINNING THIS TIME.
BUT WIN OR LOSE, THERE'S NO
DOUBT IN MY MIND THAT BIDEN OR
WHOEVER THE DEMOCRATIC CANDIDATE
IS, JUST IN CASE HE'S NOT --
IT'S NOT OFFICIAL YET.
HILLARY WON BY 3 MILLION VOTES
IN THE POPULAR VOTE AS WE CALL
IT.
I THINK BIDEN, HE'LL WIN BY
5 MILLION, I THINK A LOT OF
PEOPLE ARE GOING TO COME OUT
THAT STAYED HOME MISTAKENLY LAST
TIME, THEY'RE GOING TO COME OUT
THIS TIME.
BUT I THINK TRUMP COULD STILL
WIN THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE.
ALL OF US HAVE TO BE REALLY IN
FIGHTING MODE, BECAUSE HE IS.
HE KNOWS HIS PEOPLE.
HE WILL GET ALL THAT 44-46%, HE
JUST NEEDS A COUPLE MORE PERCENT
OF THE PEOPLE ON HIS SIDE WHO
STAYED HOME LAST TIME.
>> Bill: HE'S SO UPFRONT ABOUT
HOW THE LESS PEOPLE VOTE THE
BETTER IT IS FOR REPUBLICANS.
HE LITERALLY SAID "IF WE HAD
MORE PEOPLE VOTING, YOU'D NEVER
HAVE A REPUBLICAN IN THIS
COUNTRY ELECTED AGAIN."
THAT'S NOT THE SUBTEXT OF WHAT
HE SAID, THAT'S ACTUALLY WHAT HE
SAID, YOU GOT TO GIVE IT TO THIS
GUY, HE DOESN'T SPEAK HIS INNER
MONOLOGUE.
>> THAT'S WHY IF YOU LISTEN TO
HIM AND YOU TAKE HIM AT HIS
WORD, UNDERSTANDS THAT HE IS A
LOT OF THE TIME TELLING THE
TRUTH.
NOT THE GREATER TRUTH, HIS
TRUTH.
HE BELIEVES THAT, HE WOULD PASS
A LIE DETECTOR IF YOU WIRED HIM
UP.
AND HE'S RIGHT.
IF WE MAKE IT EASY FOR PEOPLE TO
VOTE, IF WE DON'T HAVE VOTER
SUPPRESSION, REPUBLICANS ARE
GOING TO LOSE BECAUSE THE
MAJORITY OF THE COUNTRY DOES NOT
SUPPORT THE REPUBLICAN AGENDA.
THE MAJORITY OF THE COUNTRY ARE
NOT CLIMATE DENIERS, THE
MAJORITY OF THE COUNTRY BELIEVES
WOMEN SHOULD BE PAID THE SAME AS
MEN, GO DOWN THE WHOLE LIST.
THE MAJORITY OF THE COUNTRY
TAKES THE LIBERAL CENTER LEFT
DEMOCRATIC PARTY POSITION ON
MOST ISSUES.
SO THE ONLY WAY REPUBLICANS CAN
WIN -- THIS HAS BEEN TRUE FOR A
FEW ELECTIONS IS TO CHEAT.
GAME IT, RAGGED, DO WHATEVER
THEY NEED TO DO -- IN THIS CASE
WHAT I'M WORRIED ABOUT IS THAT
LAST TIME, HE THREATENED, HE
KEPT SAYING THE WHOLE ELECTION
IS GOING TO BE RIGGED AND HE
SAID MY SECOND AMENDMENT PEOPLE,
I APPEALED TO MY
SECOND AMENDMENT PEOPLE, THE GUN
PEOPLE.
TO GET READY, BECAUSE THIS IS
GOING TO BE A RIGGED ELECTION.
THE FUNNY THING IS WHAT HE
ACTUALLY THOUGHT -- HE WAS
CERTAINLY HE WOULD WIN THE
POPULAR VOTE BECAUSE OF COURSE
EVERYBODY LOVES HIM, THAT'S WHAT
A MALIGNANT NARCISSIST WOULD
BELIEVE.
BUT HE WAS WORRIED THAT THE
CLINTONS WERE GOING TO SOMEHOW
MAKE THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE AND
THAT'S HOW HE WAS GOING TO LOSE.
THIS TIME, HE DOESN'T EVEN HAVE
TO -- HE'S ALREADY GOT HIS GUN
GUYS.
THE GUYS WITH THE GUNS, WE SAW
THIS IN MICHIGAN THE LAST COUPLE
OF WEEKS SHOWING UP AT THE STATE
CAPITAL WITH THEIR LONG ARMS AND
THREATENING EVERYBODY TO THE
POINT WHERE THE GOVERNOR LAST
THURSDAY JUST SHUT THE
LEGISLATURE DOWN, CALLED THE DAY
OFF, WAS SO AFRAID.
I WANT TO APPEAL TO PEOPLE TO
NOT BE AFRAID OF THESE GUYS WITH
THE GUNS.
I WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL WITH THEM,
I KNOW THEM.
THEY WANT TO KILL BAMBI.
THAT'S THEIR IDEA OF A REAL
FIGHT, THEM AND A DEER.
IF THE DEER WERE EVER ARMED, IF
IT WAS A FAIR FIGHT, THESE GUYS
WOULD NEVER BE IN THE WOODS.
IT'S SO IMPORTANT THAT LIBERALS
WHO GENERALLY ARE NOT GUN OWNERS
NOT BE AFRAID BECAUSE THAT'S
WHAT THEY'RE TRYING TO DO NOW --
LIBERATE MICHIGAN, LIBERATE
MINNESOTA, GOOD ON ALL OF YOU
FOR SHOWING UP WITH THOSE GUNS.
HE'S JUST TRYING TO SCARE
LIBERALS BECAUSE LIBERALS SCARE
EASY -- DON'T BE SCARED.
WE ARE THE MAJORITY, THERE IS
MORE OF US THAN THERE ARE OF
THEM.
THE ONLY WAY THAT THEY'RE GOING
TO PULL IT OFF IS IF SOMEHOW
HE'S ABLE TO CANCEL THE ELECTION
OR POSTPONE IT.
THAT'S WHAT WE HAVE TO FIGHT
AGAINST BECAUSE I'M CERTAIN
THAT'S WHAT'S GOING ON.
>> Bill: ONE WHAT HE WANTS TO
RIGGED THE VOTE IS HE'S
DECLARING WAR OF THE
POST OFFICE.
FOR EXAMPLE, MICHIGAN SENT OUT
BALLOTS LAST WEEK TO EVERYBODY
AND TRUMP, HIS RESPONSE WAS TO
THREATEN TO WITHHOLD COBID AID
TO THE STATE OF MICHIGAN IN
RESPONSE WHICH SOUNDS TO ME LIKE
THE EXACT SAME PLAYBOOK FROM
UKRAINE, WITHHOLDING AID TO,
THAT'S ONE OF HIS BIG TRICKS
EXCEPT THIS IS OUR COUNTRY!
IN THE MIDDLE OF A PANDEMIC.
HE SEEMS TO BE VERY AFRAID OF
MAIL IN VOTES, AND I DON'T KNOW
IF THAT'S TRUE.
WE HAD AN ELECTION FLIPPED IN
CALIFORNIA, THE 25TH DISTRICT
WHICH WAS KATIE HILL'S DISTRICT,
THE WOMAN WHO RESIGNED BECAUSE
OF A SEX SCANDAL, SOMETHING THAT
NO REPUBLICAN WOULD EVER DO, IT
WAS A PICTURE OF HER WITH A
CHICK SO SHE HAD TO GO, TYPICAL
STUPID DEMOCRATIC MOVE, A
SPECIAL ELECTION, REPUBLICAN
WON.
NOBODY EVER HEARD HIS NAME, HE
DIDN'T DO ANY CAMPAIGNING, IT
WAS ALL MAIL IN.
THE MALE END DIDN'T HURT
REPUBLICANS IN THAT ONE, I'M NOT
SO SURE TRUMP SHOULD BE AFRAID
OF MAIL IN.
HIS VOTERS ARE OLDER, THEY LIKE
THE MAIL.
>> WE ALSO WANT TO PROTECT THE
POST OFFICE BECAUSE THE
POST OFFICE IS -- IT'S PART OF
OUR HOMELAND SECURITY IN THE
SENSE THAT IF THE GOVERNMENT
NEEDED TO SEND ANYTHING TO EVERY
AMERICAN TOMORROW, EVERYBODY HAS
DAILY CONTACT WITH -- THERE'S
ONLY ONE PERSON FROM THE U.S.
GOVERNMENT THAT HAS CONTACT WITH
YOU EVERY DAY AND THAT'S YOUR
MALE WOMAN OR MAILMAN.
THE ABILITY TO ACTUALLY -- LET'S
SAY FOR INSTANCE THERE WAS
MEDICINE THAT WE ALL NEEDED TO
TAKE IMMEDIATELY.
THE ONLY WAY TO SHIP THAT OUT IS
THROUGH THE U.S. POST OFFICE AND
IT CAN BE THROUGH EVERYBODY'S
MAILBOX THE NEXT DAY.
IT'S VERY IMPORTANT TO PROTECT
THE POST OFFICE JUST FOR OUR OWN
SECURITY.
WHETHER HE UNDERSTANDS WHAT
HAPPENED IN CALIFORNIA OR NOT,
IT DOESN'T MATTER.
ALL THAT HE NEEDS TO DO IS
FOLLOW WHAT FOX & FRIENDS IS
TELLING HIM AND THAT'S GOOD
ENOUGH.
A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T BELIEVE
HE'S TAKING THIS DRUG, THE
ANTIMALARIA DRUG, I BELIEVE HIM.
I BELIEVE TRUMP WHEN HE SAYS --
I THINK HE'S TAKING IT.
HE'S IN SUCH A STATE RIGHT NOW
AND I THINK HE KNOWS IF IT WAS A
FAIR ELECTION, HE IS GOING TO
LOSE.
HE'S GOT TO DO WHATEVER HE CAN
TO GIN THIS UP IN WHATEVER WAY
TO MAKE SURE THAT DOESN'T
HAPPEN.
GOING AFTER MICHIGAN, STATE THAT
VOTED FOR HIM, MAKES NO SENSE.
BUT WHAT HE'S MAD AT IN
MICHIGAN, THAT WOMAN AS HE CALLS
HER, THE GOVERNOR -- WHAT
HAPPENED AFTER TWO YEARS OF
TRUMP IN THE 2018 ELECTION, THE
PEOPLE OF MICHIGAN THROUGHOUT
ALL THE TOP REPUBLICANS AND
VOTED IN -- THE TOP FOUR PEOPLE
WHO RUN THE STATE OF MICHIGAN,
THE GOVERNOR'S A WOMAN, THE
LIEUTENANT GOVERNOR IS BLACK,
THERE IS A LESBIAN WHO IS THE
ATTORNEY GENERAL, AND A SINGLE
MOM IS THE SECRETARY OF STATE.
THAT'S WHO RUNS MICHIGAN,
THERE'S NOT A SINGLE WHITE GUY
ANYWHERE IN THERE AND I THINK HE
DOESN'T LIKE TO DEAL WITH THAT.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT IT IS
WITH HIM AND WOMEN, BUT THAT'S
WORSE THAN ANYTHING THAT HE HAS
TO DEAL WITH THESE WOMEN IN
MICHIGAN.
I HOPE HE GETS HIS COMEUPPANCE
FOR IT, BUT THAT WILL ONLY
HAPPEN IF PEOPLE DO THEIR JOB.
LET ME SAY THIS -- IT'S REALLY
INCUMBENT UPON BIDEN HERE.
PEOPLE LIKE YOU AND I -- YOU AND
I CAN GO ON TV AND SAY EVERYBODY
GET OUT THERE AND VOTE, THAT'S
NOT HOW IT'S GONNA HAPPEN.
BIDEN HAS GOT TO INSPIRE PEOPLE
TO GET OUT AND VOTE.
TELL THEM WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO
DO FOR THEM.
USE THIS PANDEMIC TO SHOW ALL
THE THINGS THAT HAVE BEEN
EXPOSED ABOUT HOW THIS SOCIETY
OF OURS RUNS AND HOW AWFUL AND
DEADLY TRUMP HAS BEEN.
AT THIS POINT, WERE ALMOST AT
100,000 DEAD AMERICANS.
ALL OF THIS COULD HAVE BEEN NOT
PREVENTED BUT NOT THIS MANY
PEOPLE NEEDED TO DIE.
>> Bill: NOT AT ALL.
LET ME ASK YOU ABOUT, GOING THE
WAY, WHAT I CALL MY ISSUE IT'S
THE THING I CAN'T SEEM TO LET GO
OF AND HAVE BEEN TRYING TO GET
PEOPLE --
>> THE LACK OF BELIEF IN A
DEITY?
>> Bill: THAT WAS MY OLD ISSUE
ISSUE.
FOR THE LAST FOUR YEARS IT'S
BEEN HE'S NOT GONNA LOSE, HE'S
NOT GONNA LEAVE EVEN IF HE LOSES
LOSES.
I WOULD LIKE TO PRESENT THIS AS
EVIDENCE, THEY ASKED JARED
KUSHNER, NOVEMBER 3RD WHICH IS
ELECTION DAY, HE SAID I'M NOT
SURE I CAN COMMIT ONE WAY OR THE
OTHER, RIGHT NOW, THAT'S THE
PLAN.
HE LATER RETRACTED THAT AND
BLAMED THE ERROR OF BEING AN
OVERWHELMED DIP SHIPPED DIP SHIE
MENTIONED HOW TRUMP WAS RAILING
ITS RATE AND THAT WAS IN ABOUT
ELECTION HE WON YOU.
I'VE HEARD YOU SAY I THINK I'M
RIGHT THAT MAYBE HE'S NOT GONNA
LEAVE BUT THEN THE COPS WILL
TAKE PLEASURE IN OUSTING HIM?
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN HIM IN FRONT
OF COPS?
IT'S LIKE JAMES BROWN AT THE
APOLLO.
>> COPS ACROSS AMERICA LOVE HIM,
IT'S THE COPS IN D.C. -- THE
D.C. POLICE FORCE IS MOSTLY
BLACK.
SO RIGHT THERE, HE'S GOT TO HOPE
THAT THE AFRICAN-AMERICAN POLICE
FORCE IN D.C. IS GOING TO
PROTECT HIM WHEN HE SAYS I'M NOT
LEAVING.
>> Bill: IT'S UP TO THEM TO
OUST HIM?
>> HOW ABOUT THE FBI?
HE'S PISTOL OVER THE FBI, THE
CIA, THE PEOPLE AT THE PENTAGON,
HE'S CRATED A LOT OF ANIMOSITY.
>> Bill: LOOK AT ALL THE OTHER
PEOPLE HE'S PISSED ON, YOU
CANNOT NAME A SENATOR STARTING
WITH LINDSEY GRAHAM WHO HASN'T
SAID HORRIBLE THINGS ABOUT AND
SOMEHOW THEY STILL WIND UP BEING
HIS ALLIES.
>> IF THE POLICE DON'T DO THEIR
JOB, THERE'S YOU AND ME.
YOU AND I ARE GOING TO GO THERE.
I'M INVITING YOU TO COME WITH
ME, WE ARE GOING TO GO THERE AND
I THINK WE CAN GET THOUSANDS,
MILLIONS OF AMERICANS TO SHOW UP
AND ESCORT HIM IN THE BEST
ADDICTION EVER THAT'S TAKEN
PLACE IN THE UNITED STATES AND
REMOVE HIM FROM THAT BUILDING.
HE'S NOT STAYING.
EVERYONE WATCHING THIS RIGHT
NOW, WE ALL AGREE ON THAT.
WE'RE NOT GOING TO SIT BACK AND
TAKE THAT AFTER HE LOSES AND HE
SAYS HE'S NOT GOING TO LEAVE.
>> Bill: YOU TALK ABOUT AND I
HAVE TALKED ABOUT HIM CALLING ON
HIS SECOND AMENDMENT FRIENDS.
DO YOU THINK THEY ARE NOT GOING
TO BE THERE WHEN WE SHOW UP?
I THINK IF IT DIDN'T TURN
VIOLENT IT WOULD BE A GREAT
ENDING TO A MICHAEL MOORE MOVIE,
BUT I THINK IT'S GOING TO BE A
DIFFERENT KIND OF MOVIE BECAUSE
AGAIN, WE ARE NOT GOING TO BE
THE ONLY ONES IN THE STREETS
WHEN HE IS SAYING "THIS WAS
RIGGED AND I SHOULDN'T GO."
I WOULD THINK MOST OF THESE GUYS
I WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL WITH, WITH
THEIR BIG GUNS, THEY KNOW
BETTER, THEY CAN SEE THE END
GAME OF THIS, THEY'RE NOT GOING
TO WIN.
THEY ARE LIVING THEIR WHITE LIFE
IN THEIR WHITE NEIGHBORHOODS, IF
THEY END UP BEING ARRESTED AND
TRIED FOR DOING WHAT YOU
SUGGESTED, THEY WILL THEN BE
MOVED TO A BLACK AND BROWN
NEIGHBORHOOD CALLED THE
UNITED STATES PRISON SYSTEM.
>> Bill: THAT'S ASSUMING THAT
WE HAVE THE OLD COUNTRY THAT
WE'VE ALWAYS HAD TO.
I'M NOT SO SURE WE HAVE THAT
ONE.
TRUMP THIS WEEK THIS MONTH HAS
GOTTEN RID OF FOUR INSPECTOR
GENERAL'S OF DIFFERENT AGENCIES.
IMPEACHMENT TURNED OUT TO BE A
HORRIBLE THING.
IF I KNEW WHAT I KNEW NOW --
>> HE BELIEVED ROBERT MUELLER
AND HE GOT SCARED AND WOULDN'T
EVEN BRING HIM INTO BE
INTERROGATED, HE DIDN'T BRING
HIM BEFORE THE GRAND JURY,
MUELLER WAS SO AFRAID TO DO HIS
JOB, THEN HE THREATENS COMEY AND
WHAT DOES COMEY DO?
HE REOPENS THE INVESTIGATION ON
HILLARY.
>> Bill: JUST THE IMPEACHMENT.
IF I COULD DO IT OVER AGAIN, I
WOULDN'T BECAUSE IT JUST
EMBOLDENED HIM.
NOW HE CAN CONDUCT THIS WAR ON
ACCOUNTABILITY AND IT BARELY
MADE THE PAPERS.
MOST PEOPLE ARE WATCHING THIS
GOING I HAVEN'T HEARD THAT.
>> THEY MIGHT BE FIVE
INSPECTOR GENERAL'S AT LAST
COUNT.
THE BEST WAY TO TAKE OVER AN
ELECTION, AND NOT LEAVE THE
WHITE HOUSE, I AGREE.
ALL THE OTHER THINGS THAT PEOPLE
WATCHING US TONIGHT DON'T KNOW
WHAT HAPPENED IN THE LAST FEW
WEEKS, THE CLEAN AIR ACT, THE
CLEAN WATER ACT, SUSPENDED, WE
DON'T HAVE TIME TO DO ALL THIS
INVESTIGATION, ALL THOSE PEOPLE
GONE.
IF AND WHEN THE PANDEMIC ENDS IF
IT DOESN'T -- EVEN IN HIS TERM,
THOSE INSPECTORS WHETHER THE
INSPECTOR GENERAL'S ARE THE
PEOPLE WHO DO OUR CLEAN AIR AND
CLEAN WATER, THEY'RE NOT COMING
BACK, NOT UNDER DONALD TRUMP.
THIS IS HIS WAY TO MOVE THIS
THING PERMANENTLY, IT MAKES HIM
DANGEROUS.
DID I HEAR EVERYBODY AT HOME SAY
THEY WOULD JOIN BILL AND I IN
D.C. ON JANUARY 20TH?
>> Bill: IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!
WE'LL HAVE A BIRTHDAY BASH IN
D.C.!
>> AND REMOVE THIS MOTHERFUCKER
FROM THE WHITE HOUSE.
>> Bill: ALWAYS GREAT TO SEE
YOU AND HOPEFULLY THINGS WILL BE
DIFFERENT NEXT TIME WE MEET.
TAKE CARE.
OKAY!
NOW IT'S TIME FOR NEW RULES!
EVERYBODY, NEW RULES!
DOOR SCREAMING AT HOME!
NEW RULE: I GET THAT STORES NEED
TO REMIND CUSTOMERS TO SOCIAL
DISTANCE, BUT THIS - IS A LITTLE
MUCH.
I WANT TO BUY SHOES.
NOT PLAY TWISTER.
AND IF I GO THE WRONG WAY - WILL
I HEAR THIS?
NEW RULE: THE NEWSPAPERS
PRINTING THE STORY ABOUT AN
81-YEAR-OLD MAN WHO'S BEEN
ACCUSED OF KILLING ANOTHER MAN
DURING A SADOMASOCHISTIC SEX ACT
MUST, STOP BURYING THE LEDE.
LOOK, BEING IN THE BEST POSSIBLE
HEALTH SHOULD BE ON ALL OUR
MINDS THESE DAYS, AND IF YOU'RE
81 AND HAVE THE STRENGTH TO FUCK
AND THEN KILL ANOTHER GROWN MAN,
IT'S CLEAR TO ME YOU'RE DOING
SOMETHING RIGHT.
I'M NOT SAYING RELEASE HIM AND
GIVE HIM A BOOK DEAL, BUT MAYBE
SOMEONE CAN ASK HIM ABOUT HIS
WORKOUT ROUTINE.
NEW RULE: THE VIRGINIA
RESTAURANT THAT IS FILLING ITS
EMPTY TABLES WITH 1950s- ERA
MANNEQUINS HAS TO ADMIT THIS IS
MORE DEPRESSING THAN LEAVING THE
TABLES EMPTY.
THOUGH I MUST SAY, YOU NAILED
THE 1950s PART.
WHERE THE WIVES ARE CLEARLY
BORED.
BECAUSE THE HUSBANDS ARE
OBVIOUSLY GAY.
NEW RULE: SINCE WE DON'T HAVE
ANY SPORTS TO WATCH, LET'S START
BROADCASTING FIGHTS BETWEEN
PEOPLE WHO DON'T WANT TO WEAR A
MASK AND PEOPLE WHO INSIST THEY
DO.
TWO MEN ENTER COSTCO.
ONLY ONE LEAVES.
DON'T THINK OF IT AS ANOTHER
SIGN AMERICA IS COMING APART.
THINK OF IT AS AMERICA'S DUMBER
VERSION OF MEXICAN WRESTLING.
NEW RULE: THE SOUTH KOREAN
SOCCER TEAM THAT USED SEX DOLLS
TO FILL THE EMPTY STANDS DOESN'T
HAVE TO APOLOGIZE.
BUT THEY DO HAVE TO EXPLAIN WHY
THEY MADE THEM WEAR MASKS.
ONE OF THE BENEFITS OF SEX DOLLS
IS THEY'RE NOT GOING TO GIVE YOU
A VIRUS.
PLUS, THAT FACE IS PERFECT FOR A
SOCCER GAME - THEY ALL LOOK LIKE
THEY'RE SCREAMING
"GOOOOOAAAAALLLL!!"
AND FINALLY, NEW RULE.
YOU CAN'T HAVE SO MUCH MONEY
THAT MY COMPUTER'S SPELLCHECK
DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO CALL YOU.
"JEFF BEZOS IS POISED TO BE THE
WORLD'S FIRST TRILLIONAIRE" THE
HEADLINE SAYS.
EVEN MY PHONE IS LIKE, "THAT
CAN'T BE RIGHT."
BUT IT PROBABLY IS BECAUSE WE
NOW LIVE IN AN AGE NOT OF
INNOVATION, BUT OF DOMINATION.
START-UPS ARE IN A 13-YEAR SLUMP
AND FINANCING IS DOWN 22% FROM
EIGHT YEARS AGO BECAUSE IN THE
ONLINE MARKET PLACE AMAZON HAS
BECOME THE ONLY GAME IN TOWN.
AND THAT WAS BEFORE AN EVENT
HAPPENED THAT MADE EVERYONE STAY
HOME AND ORDER EVERYTHING
ONLINE.
PREDICTABLY, ONCE THE VIRUS HIT
AND AMERICA LOCKED ITSELF
UPSTAIRS LIKE A BABY-SITTER
HIDING FROM A SLASHER, THE REST
OF THE ECONOMY CRATERED - BUT
AMAZON'S STOCK PRICE IS UP 25%.
THAT'S WHAT I CALL
"ASYMPTOMATIC."
PLACES LIKE J. CREW, STAGE
STORES, NEIMAN MARCUS, J.C.
PENNY, SEARS, PIER 1 IMPORTS ARE
THROWING IN THE TOWEL, AS IT
SEEMS ONE OF THE UNINTENDED
CONSEQUENCES OF OUR CORONA
RESPONSE IS EVERYONE GOING OUT
OF BUSINESS AT THE SAME TIME.
EXCEPT AMAZON.
WHILE WE'RE INSIDE, GETTING
SOFTER AND HAIRIER, IT'S OUT
THERE, GETTING BIGGER AND
STRONGER.
AND IF WE DON'T DO SOMETHING,
WE'RE GOING TO COME OUT OF OUR
HOLES AND DISCOVER THAT THERE'S
ONLY ONE STORE.
AND IT KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE.
THERE WAS A FAMOUS FOLK SONG
FROM THE 1950s CALLED "16 TONS,"
AND LIKE ALL FOLK SONGS IT WAS
HORRIBLE, BUT IT DID RAISE
AWARENESS ABOUT THE PROBLEM OF
HAVING JUST ONE STORE, BECAUSE
IT WAS ABOUT THE OLD MINING
TOWNS WHERE THE WORKERS ONLY HAD
THE ONE COMPANY STORE.
THE CHORUS WENT: "SIXTEEN TONS
AND WHAT DO YOU GET, ANOTHER DAY
OLDER AND DEEPER IN DEBT, ST.
PETER DON'T YOU CALL ME, CUZ I
CAN'T GO, I OWE MY SOUL TO THE
COMPANY STO."
LIKE I SAID, FOLK SONGS ARE
HORRIBLE.
BUT AT LEAST BACK THEN WE
UNDERSTOOD THAT GETTING
EVERYTHING FROM ONE STORE WAS A
BAD THING.
BUT THAT WAS BP -- "BEFORE
PRIME."
YOU MIGHT BE SURPRISED TO LEARN
THAT ELIZABETH WARREN HAD A PLAN
TO BREAK UP AMAZON -- AND I SAY
LET'S GO FOR IT.
LIKE SENATOR WARREN, I'M A
CAPITALIST TO MY CORE, BUT WHEN
A COMPANY GETS SO BIG IT
SMOTHERS ALL COMPETITORS IN THE
CRIB, THAT'S ANTI-CAPITALIST.
LIKE WHEN AMAZON DESTROYED THE
START-UP DIAPERS.COM BY CUTTING
AMAZON'S OWN DIAPER PRICES BELOW
COST.
BY ONE ESTIMATE BEZOS LOST $100
MILLION DOLLARS IN HIS QUEST TO
CORNER THE ONLINE DIAPER MARKET.
BUT HE OWNS IT NOW.
WHICH RAISES THE QUESTION, WHAT
IS WRONG WITH THIS MAN?
OKAY, YOU HAD ONE BRILLIANT IDEA
-- THAT WHEN PEOPLE GET DRUNK AT
HOME, THEY'LL GO ONLINE AND BUY
SHIT THEY DON'T NEED.
GREAT, CONGRATULATIONS, YOU WON,
YOU'RE THE BEST AT MAKING MONEY.
BUT ONE OF THE RULES OF THE GAME
OF CAPITALISM IS: YOU CAN WIN
BIG, BUT NOT SO BIG THERE IS NO
GAME.
WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS BEFORE A
CENTURY AGO WHEN JOHN D.
ROCKEFELLER WAS PERSONALLY WORTH
2% OF AMERICA'S GDP AND HIS
STANDARD OIL COMPANY BECAME SUCH
AN OVERWHELMING MONOPOLY THAT
CONGRESS WROTE THE SHERMAN
ANTITRUST ACT TO BREAK IT UP.
BUT ROCKEFELLER HAD ONLY ONE
PRODUCT --, OIL.
AMAZON SELLS 119 MILLION
DIFFERENT ITEMS.
AND WHEN ONE SUPPLIER BRINGS YOU
EVERYTHING, YOU'RE NOT A
CUSTOMER, YOU'RE A DEPENDENT.
AND LOOK, I USE AMAZON, I'M NOT
SAYING AMAZON IS PURE,
UNADULTERATED EVIL.
THAT'S WELLS FARGO.
BUT AMAZON PREYS UPON THE
ACHILLES HEEL OF THE AMERICAN
CHARACTER: WE WILL SELL OUR SOUL
FOR CONVENIENCE.
LIBERALS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE
ENVIRONMENTALISTS -- THEY MUST
NOTICE HOW WRONG IT IS FOR US TO
DO SO MUCH OF OUR SHOPPING IN
SUCH A WASTEFUL, PIGGISH MANNER.
DOES ANYONE REALLY NEED A GRILL
COVER TO GET TO YOU OVERNIGHT
AND IN A SEPARATE BOX FROM
SOMETHING YOU ORDERED THE DAY
BEFORE FROM THE SAME WAREHOUSE?
WHEN I WAS A KID, GETTING A
PACKAGE WAS A RARE EVENT -- NOW
KIDS THINK THE UPS MAN IS THEIR
DAD.
WHY DO SOCKS NEED A PROTECTIVE
AIR CUSHION?
I'M GOING TO SHOVE MY FOOT IN IT
AND STOMP ON IT ALL DAY.
THEY SHIP A DISPOSABLE RAZOR IN
A BOX THE SIZE OF A COFFIN IN
ENOUGH PLASTIC TO CHOKE A WHALE
-- WHICH IT EVENTUALLY DOES.
AND I HAVEN'T EVEN MENTIONED
THAT AMAZON OFTEN PAYS NO TAXES,
AND BATHROOM BREAKS FOR WORKERS
ARE SO INFREQUENT THEY HAVE TO
PEE INTO BOTTLES.
WHICH ARE THEN RESOLD AS
KOMBUCHA.
MAYBE THIS IS JUST THE
HUNTER-GATHERER IN ME SPEAKING,
BUT SOMEDAY I HOPE TO LEAVE THE
CAVE AGAIN, AND I'M GONNA WANT
SOMEWHERE TO SHOP.
IN PERSON.
SO THIS WEEKEND, BE A HERO AND
GO OUT, TO AN ACTUAL STORE, AND
PATRONIZE SOME OTHER BUSINESS
BESIDES AMAZON, AND LET'S SEE IF
WE CAN'T GET AMERICA BACK ON ITS
FEET AGAIN.
WE'RE LOOKING PRETTY RAGGEDY,
AND YOU KNOW THE OLD SAYING: IF
THE SHOE FITS, YOU PROBABLY
DIDN'T GET IT ONLINE.
OKAY, THAT'S OUR SHOW.
I WANT TO THANK MY GUESTS THOMAS
FRIEDMAN, DR. CATE SHANAHAN AND
MICHAEL MOORE.
WE'LL BE BACK NEXT WEEK.
SOME DAY, THE STUDIO.
PROBABLY FROM MY BACKYARD.
THANK YOU, FOLKS.
-KELLI: Look at Miss Inglewood. -Hey!
♪ I'm too hot... ♪
You hear dat?