1 00:00:01,041 --> 00:00:03,874 Now the story of a wealthy family who lost everything... 2 00:00:03,978 --> 00:00:06,469 and the one son who had no choice... 3 00:00:06,580 --> 00:00:08,571 but to keep them all together. 4 00:00:14,121 --> 00:00:15,816 It's Arrested Development. 5 00:00:18,292 --> 00:00:21,557 Michael Bluth and his family were meeting with their new attorney. 6 00:00:21,662 --> 00:00:24,893 Look, this is not the first time I've been brought in to replace Barry Zuckerkorn. 7 00:00:24,999 --> 00:00:27,229 I think I can do for you everything he did... 8 00:00:27,334 --> 00:00:29,928 plus skew younger... with juries and so forth. 9 00:00:30,037 --> 00:00:31,664 Any other questions? 10 00:00:31,772 --> 00:00:34,764 Yes. How can you be even cuter in person than you are in your ads? 11 00:00:34,875 --> 00:00:37,366 Are you a CEO, CFO or other executive... 12 00:00:37,478 --> 00:00:39,776 facing these or similar charges? 13 00:00:39,880 --> 00:00:44,840 Why should you go to jail for a crime someone else... noticed? 14 00:00:44,952 --> 00:00:48,718 You don't need double-talk. You need Bob Loblaw. 15 00:00:48,822 --> 00:00:50,756 Bob Loblaw no habla espanol. 16 00:00:50,858 --> 00:00:53,418 Well, we're not here to talk nonsense to Bob Loblaw. 17 00:00:53,527 --> 00:00:55,859 We need to find out if the government has a good case against us. 18 00:00:55,963 --> 00:00:58,864 I mean, there is a lot of proof that my father was building houses in Iraq. 19 00:00:58,966 --> 00:01:01,696 Well, your father claims he was put up to it by a British syndicate. 20 00:01:01,802 --> 00:01:04,396 - And you've been threatened. Isn't that correct? - It was. 21 00:01:04,505 --> 00:01:07,702 How would you like someone going after some stupid person in your family? 22 00:01:07,808 --> 00:01:10,538 Now, back off, you!@%$# ponce! 23 00:01:10,644 --> 00:01:12,373 It's been a week. Nothing's happened. 24 00:01:12,479 --> 00:01:15,573 Yeah, but you're not the one stuck under house arrest like a sitting duck. 25 00:01:15,682 --> 00:01:17,582 Oh, yeah. That's my father. 26 00:01:17,684 --> 00:01:20,209 That's why we had the meeting here... so he couldn't interfere. 27 00:01:20,320 --> 00:01:23,721 Interfere? I oughta pull down your pants and spank your ass raw. 28 00:01:23,824 --> 00:01:26,224 I'm sorry. Have we met? 29 00:01:26,326 --> 00:01:29,762 Oh, yes. This is Larry Middleman. He's your father's surrogate. 30 00:01:29,863 --> 00:01:32,127 - Surrogate? - That's right, you dumb!@%$. 31 00:01:32,232 --> 00:01:34,223 I hired this guy to wear a camera in his hat... 32 00:01:34,334 --> 00:01:37,064 so he could be my eyes and ears while I'm stuck in this penthouse. 33 00:01:37,171 --> 00:01:40,197 This camera helps me keep tabs on you idiots... 34 00:01:40,307 --> 00:01:42,400 while this thing rubs my ankle raw. 35 00:01:42,509 --> 00:01:45,967 - I mean, look at this thing. - I can't even go in the hallway... 36 00:01:46,080 --> 00:01:49,413 - Without hearing that... - Beep, beep, beep. 37 00:01:49,516 --> 00:01:52,246 That's one of my partners. Excuse me. 38 00:01:52,352 --> 00:01:54,718 Uh, I would like to be one of your partners. 39 00:01:54,822 --> 00:01:57,620 Do you think he got that? The two meanings? 40 00:01:57,724 --> 00:01:59,624 He's running pretty fast. I think he did. 41 00:01:59,726 --> 00:02:01,626 Well, he was flirting earlier. I'll tell you that. 42 00:02:01,728 --> 00:02:04,629 Just so you know, I'm looking to get divorced. 43 00:02:04,731 --> 00:02:06,255 - Are you interested? - Yes. 44 00:02:11,138 --> 00:02:13,106 Let's call that a half hour. 45 00:02:13,207 --> 00:02:16,176 - So you're not the only one who's got a date later. - You've got a date? 46 00:02:16,276 --> 00:02:20,303 Her name's Rita. She teaches children at a private school, and we're just having lunch. 47 00:02:20,414 --> 00:02:22,507 Oh, lunch. Well, you better bring some dog food. 48 00:02:22,616 --> 00:02:26,177 All the girls you date are dogs. Dogs love dog food, right, Pop? 49 00:02:26,286 --> 00:02:28,550 Shut up, you idiot. I'm trying to watch the game. 50 00:02:28,655 --> 00:02:31,089 Just trying to make you laugh, Dad. 51 00:02:31,191 --> 00:02:33,887 - It's all I ever wanted. - Smith the catcher... 52 00:02:33,994 --> 00:02:36,724 You know, Gob, she's not a dog. It's just the opposite actually. 53 00:02:36,830 --> 00:02:41,893 She's exquisitely beautiful. She's fun, carefree, smart, full of surprises. 54 00:02:42,002 --> 00:02:45,403 Including the fact that she was working with this man... 55 00:02:45,506 --> 00:02:47,838 who was currently dropping her off for her date. 56 00:02:47,941 --> 00:02:51,240 Now all this fun and carefree act is only gonna fool him for so long. 57 00:02:51,345 --> 00:02:55,008 - I'm a big girl. - Yeah. Well, if he finds out what you really are... 58 00:02:55,115 --> 00:02:57,811 he might not make things so simple for you. 59 00:02:57,918 --> 00:03:01,319 Rita, don't forget your hat. 60 00:03:05,292 --> 00:03:08,523 - Who am I kidding? She's too good for me. - How do you think I feel? 61 00:03:08,629 --> 00:03:11,154 Bob Loblaw's a handsome, professional man... 62 00:03:11,265 --> 00:03:13,859 and I'm only used to... well, none of those things. 63 00:03:13,967 --> 00:03:17,027 Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over? 64 00:03:17,137 --> 00:03:20,868 An analyst and a therapist. The world's first "analrapist." 65 00:03:20,974 --> 00:03:24,740 Yes, and you were almost arrested for those business cards. 66 00:03:24,845 --> 00:03:28,372 Yes. No, it did not look good on paper, but I didn't stop because of the police inquiries. 67 00:03:28,482 --> 00:03:30,609 I stopped to raise our little daughter. 68 00:03:30,717 --> 00:03:34,175 But since we both have started to grow hair in unexpected places... 69 00:03:34,288 --> 00:03:37,121 I suppose I shall soon be working as a leading man... 70 00:03:37,224 --> 00:03:39,385 and she may soon start dating. 71 00:03:39,493 --> 00:03:42,053 Maeby had already started dating. 72 00:03:42,162 --> 00:03:44,187 Another date with, uh, Steve Holt? 73 00:03:44,298 --> 00:03:46,425 Yeah. We're gettin' pretty serious. 74 00:03:46,533 --> 00:03:50,594 They weren't. She was just avoiding her real crush on George Michael. 75 00:03:50,704 --> 00:03:52,569 That Steve sure knows how to please a lady. 76 00:03:52,673 --> 00:03:56,473 Good. I was hoping he would be gifted sexually. 77 00:03:56,577 --> 00:04:00,035 I guess it makes sense. You know, uh, older guys expect certain things. 78 00:04:00,147 --> 00:04:03,241 - They do? - What a fun, sexy time for you. 79 00:04:03,350 --> 00:04:05,750 I'd be very careful of these British people. 80 00:04:05,852 --> 00:04:08,719 They're gonna try to get their hands on any evidence they can to hurt the family. 81 00:04:08,822 --> 00:04:10,722 So you're saying shred the evidence? 82 00:04:10,824 --> 00:04:14,055 No, that's illegal. The prosecution is entitled to that evidence. 83 00:04:14,161 --> 00:04:16,891 - Without it, they don't have a case. - So shred the evidence? 84 00:04:16,997 --> 00:04:20,091 That's a felony. And I certainly couldn't endorse anything like that. 85 00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:22,134 Got ya. Wink. 86 00:04:22,236 --> 00:04:24,670 Wink. Did you say wink? 87 00:04:24,771 --> 00:04:27,296 - Or did you wink? - He said that too, Dad. 88 00:04:27,407 --> 00:04:29,272 We'll talk soon, folks. Thank you. 89 00:04:29,376 --> 00:04:32,072 Where are you going? Where is the surrogate going? 90 00:04:32,179 --> 00:04:35,114 Stay there. I want to see what he's gonna say. Don't leave. 91 00:04:35,215 --> 00:04:37,115 See ya, Pop. 92 00:04:37,217 --> 00:04:39,879 You know, Gob, instead of trying to impress your fake father... 93 00:04:39,987 --> 00:04:42,148 maybe you should spend some time with your real son. 94 00:04:42,256 --> 00:04:45,419 - Steve Holt's not my son. - Steve Holt? The moron jock? 95 00:04:45,525 --> 00:04:47,959 That's my son, you pothead. 96 00:04:48,061 --> 00:04:51,588 - Hey, that's my son! - Wait. So that means that Steve Holt is my cousin? 97 00:04:51,698 --> 00:04:55,259 - And Maeby's cousin too. - I guess. Shoot, I'm late for my date. 98 00:04:55,369 --> 00:04:58,532 Yeah. At the kennel! 99 00:04:58,639 --> 00:05:02,871 You lobbed that one right over the plate, Michael. Home run. 100 00:05:02,976 --> 00:05:06,173 And Michael hurried to the British section of Orange County for his date. 101 00:05:06,280 --> 00:05:09,044 Crazy American! Get out of the road! 102 00:05:09,149 --> 00:05:13,518 Only to find that Rita had chosen Wee Britain's one American-themed restaurant. 103 00:05:13,620 --> 00:05:16,020 Oh, hello. I'm sorry I'm late. 104 00:05:16,123 --> 00:05:19,957 Oh, no bother. I've been having such fun on this spaceship. 105 00:05:20,060 --> 00:05:22,392 Strike one, huh? Shall we go ahead and sit down? 106 00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:30,402 Hey, dudes, I'll get you a couple of 64-ounce colas... 107 00:05:30,504 --> 00:05:32,734 to wash down this basket of doughnuts... 108 00:05:32,839 --> 00:05:36,240 I guess this is what the British think of Americans. 109 00:05:36,343 --> 00:05:39,005 - We like our food. - Whatever do you mean? 110 00:05:39,112 --> 00:05:41,273 Yeah. 111 00:05:41,381 --> 00:05:43,872 Uh, you know, uh, Rita, you're gonna figure this out eventually... 112 00:05:43,984 --> 00:05:46,544 but I have not been on a date in a long, long time. 113 00:05:46,653 --> 00:05:49,213 - Neither have I. - I wonder why. 114 00:05:49,323 --> 00:05:51,883 I'll bet men ask you out constantly. 115 00:05:51,992 --> 00:05:55,359 Not men like you. I seem to only meet little boys. 116 00:05:55,462 --> 00:05:57,589 Part of that might be that you spend your day at a preschool. 117 00:05:57,698 --> 00:06:00,166 And they think the stupidest things are funny. 118 00:06:00,267 --> 00:06:02,735 Yeah, that's a cultural problem is what it is, you know. 119 00:06:02,836 --> 00:06:05,669 Your average American male is in a perpetual state of adolescence... 120 00:06:05,772 --> 00:06:07,672 you know, arrested development. 121 00:06:07,774 --> 00:06:09,674 Hey, that's the name of the show! 122 00:06:09,776 --> 00:06:13,837 No attention span. You know, can't even carry on a typical conver... 123 00:06:13,947 --> 00:06:17,246 Michael thought he spotted the man who'd threatened him earlier. 124 00:06:17,351 --> 00:06:19,842 Well, I'm gettin' back on the space shuttle. 125 00:06:19,953 --> 00:06:21,853 No, no, no. Sorry. Sorry. Sit, please. 126 00:06:21,955 --> 00:06:24,719 Let's talk about you. Tell me about your family. 127 00:06:24,825 --> 00:06:28,352 Well, they're pushy, bossy, want to control me. 128 00:06:28,462 --> 00:06:33,024 What about your family? I'd love to meet your family. 129 00:06:33,133 --> 00:06:34,623 Michael knew from experience... 130 00:06:34,735 --> 00:06:37,329 that this would not turn out well. 131 00:06:37,437 --> 00:06:41,203 Once or twice a week, we get a... 132 00:06:41,308 --> 00:06:43,208 Have a little more. 133 00:06:43,310 --> 00:06:46,040 If you like the small, why don't you come back for the medium? 134 00:06:48,148 --> 00:06:51,083 Right? You can see that, right? 135 00:06:51,184 --> 00:06:53,675 I probably should warn you about my mother. 136 00:06:53,787 --> 00:06:56,654 - Hi. - Let's start behind the fridge. 137 00:06:56,757 --> 00:06:59,453 So he came up with a solution so simple... 138 00:06:59,559 --> 00:07:02,551 he wondered why he'd never told anyone it before. 139 00:07:02,662 --> 00:07:05,460 I don't have a family. 140 00:07:05,565 --> 00:07:08,329 I can't believe I've never told anybody that before. 141 00:07:08,435 --> 00:07:10,494 That's so sad. 142 00:07:10,604 --> 00:07:12,970 Yes, sad. Super sad. Shall we eat? 143 00:07:15,843 --> 00:07:17,743 Michael had started a relationship... 144 00:07:17,845 --> 00:07:19,813 by lying about the existence of his family. 145 00:07:19,914 --> 00:07:21,905 I think this went really well, huh? 146 00:07:22,016 --> 00:07:24,644 - Maybe sometime we can have dinner? - Could I see your house? 147 00:07:24,752 --> 00:07:27,414 Michael was caught off-guard by the question. 148 00:07:28,723 --> 00:07:31,419 No. No. I... I can't do that. 149 00:07:31,525 --> 00:07:34,426 - Okay, bye-bye. - Uh, bye. 150 00:07:34,528 --> 00:07:37,429 And he vowed not to be caught off-guard again. 151 00:07:37,531 --> 00:07:40,091 I didn't mean that we... 152 00:07:40,201 --> 00:07:42,101 So did he invite you over, then? 153 00:07:42,203 --> 00:07:44,797 Not yet, but he will. 154 00:07:44,905 --> 00:07:47,738 So Michael went back to work. 155 00:07:47,842 --> 00:07:50,106 Hey, who brought in the wood... 156 00:07:53,381 --> 00:07:56,782 Gob, you can't shred this evidence. You'll end up in jail. 157 00:07:56,884 --> 00:08:00,786 Dad told me to. How can I say no to that face? 158 00:08:00,888 --> 00:08:04,380 Get this stuff out of here and put it somewhere where Dad can't get to it. 159 00:08:04,492 --> 00:08:09,293 - Are you in on this too? - No, I'm just here to go out to lunch with your father. 160 00:08:09,397 --> 00:08:12,059 And he said he's never felt more free in his life. 161 00:08:12,166 --> 00:08:16,796 - I'm like a bird up there. - Did you tell him about my medal? 162 00:08:16,904 --> 00:08:19,998 - Medal? What for? - Oh, who knows what they were saying. 163 00:08:23,811 --> 00:08:26,575 - Do you agree? Say thank you. - Thank you. Wow. 164 00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:30,480 - I have so many people to thank. - Private Asher, step forward! 165 00:08:30,584 --> 00:08:32,848 It's probably because a seal bit off his hand. 166 00:08:32,953 --> 00:08:36,514 The army has taken to giving medals for being food. 167 00:08:36,624 --> 00:08:39,491 - Just then... - Look at him go tied to that deck chair! 168 00:08:39,593 --> 00:08:42,892 It's so simple. My ankle monitor... 169 00:08:42,997 --> 00:08:45,329 only goes off when I go out the front door. 170 00:08:45,433 --> 00:08:47,833 We need balloons. A party! 171 00:08:47,935 --> 00:08:50,495 - We need to throw a party for... - Buster's stupid thing. 172 00:08:50,604 --> 00:08:52,970 Larry, go get some balloons. 173 00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:56,134 And Michael found a way to get Rita to his house after all. 174 00:08:56,243 --> 00:08:59,041 That's a great idea. Honor Buster tomorrow night. 175 00:08:59,146 --> 00:09:01,910 We'll get the whole family over to the penthouse, show him our support. 176 00:09:02,016 --> 00:09:05,110 Well, I suppose it's better than drinking alone. What time? 177 00:09:05,219 --> 00:09:08,382 Doesn't matter to me. I can't be there. I've got a date with Rita. 178 00:09:09,489 --> 00:09:12,858 Well, Mom's probably right. I couldn't stand up to a seal. 179 00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:14,860 I don't really deserve a medal or a party. 180 00:09:14,962 --> 00:09:17,897 No, you deserve this. Here, take my business card. 181 00:09:17,998 --> 00:09:20,762 No, no. It's pronounced "a-nalra-pist." 182 00:09:20,868 --> 00:09:22,961 It wasn't really the pronunciation that bothered me. 183 00:09:23,070 --> 00:09:26,528 You see, Buster, it wasn't the seal that you couldn't stand up to. 184 00:09:26,640 --> 00:09:28,733 It was Lucille. 185 00:09:28,843 --> 00:09:31,676 Oh, I'm getting chills. 186 00:09:31,779 --> 00:09:34,407 If this was a Lifetime moment of truth movie... 187 00:09:34,515 --> 00:09:36,415 this would be our act break. 188 00:09:37,517 --> 00:09:39,645 But it wasn't. 189 00:09:39,753 --> 00:09:43,052 And later, Lindsay was on the phone with Bob Loblaw. 190 00:09:43,157 --> 00:09:46,354 I love Tobias, but he's never fulfilled me sexually. 191 00:09:46,460 --> 00:09:48,428 Can you catalog for me the various ways... 192 00:09:48,529 --> 00:09:50,429 you'd been promised to be fulfilled... 193 00:09:50,531 --> 00:09:52,692 whether or not said promise was made explicit? 194 00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:54,927 - You want me to be explicit? - Yes. 195 00:09:55,035 --> 00:09:57,333 But I will be needing to get off in four minutes. 196 00:09:57,438 --> 00:10:01,067 Well, let's see if I can't hit that target for you. 197 00:10:01,175 --> 00:10:03,666 The next day, on the way to pick up Rita... 198 00:10:03,777 --> 00:10:08,646 Michael stopped by his house to make sure there were no signs of his family... 199 00:10:08,749 --> 00:10:10,876 only to discover there was nothing but. 200 00:10:10,985 --> 00:10:13,920 - What the hell is all this? - Gob brought all this stuff in. 201 00:10:14,021 --> 00:10:16,251 And, Mom, what is with all the family photos? 202 00:10:16,357 --> 00:10:19,417 Oh, I'm teaching Buster to stand up for himself. 203 00:10:19,527 --> 00:10:22,655 - I'm surrogating your mother. - By wearing her sealskin coat? 204 00:10:22,763 --> 00:10:25,926 Michael, I have tried on everything, and nothing seems to be working. 205 00:10:26,033 --> 00:10:29,127 I thought the Donna Karan worked. You just didn't have the right shoes. 206 00:10:29,236 --> 00:10:32,933 Look, I've gotta get rid of any evidence of my family, including you guys. 207 00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:34,940 Get outta here! 208 00:10:35,042 --> 00:10:37,476 See? Now, that's how you stand up to Mother. 209 00:10:37,578 --> 00:10:39,546 Meanwhile, worried about Steve Holt's... 210 00:10:39,647 --> 00:10:42,480 sexual expectations, Maeby tried to cancel her date. 211 00:10:42,583 --> 00:10:45,643 My whole family and I now have to go to my grandma's house... 212 00:10:45,753 --> 00:10:47,653 - because my uncle lost his hand. - Awesome! 213 00:10:47,755 --> 00:10:49,780 So you and I can party alone at your house. 214 00:10:49,890 --> 00:10:52,484 Maeby was too young to know what to do. 215 00:10:52,593 --> 00:10:56,188 Ironically, in her after-school job as a movie studio executive... 216 00:10:56,297 --> 00:10:59,960 she’d just green-lit two films that dealt with the very issue. 217 00:11:00,067 --> 00:11:02,797 - Rock the house. - All right. 218 00:11:02,903 --> 00:11:05,371 George Michael also didn't know what to do. 219 00:11:05,472 --> 00:11:08,600 If he pointed out that the two were cousins to drive them apart... 220 00:11:08,709 --> 00:11:12,008 he might be burning the very bridge that he one day hoped to cross. 221 00:11:12,112 --> 00:11:14,580 - I'm doing your cousin tonight. - So are you. 222 00:11:14,682 --> 00:11:17,913 - What? - She's your cousin too. 223 00:11:18,018 --> 00:11:21,545 Back at the penthouse, party preparations were under way. 224 00:11:21,655 --> 00:11:25,022 He's not wearing that to the party. I've got the exact same thing. 225 00:11:25,125 --> 00:11:27,525 No, he was just "analraping" me. Then Michael barged in... 226 00:11:27,628 --> 00:11:30,324 and kicked us out so he could shred all the evidence. 227 00:11:30,431 --> 00:11:32,865 - Shred the evidence? - I thought he didn't want us to do that. 228 00:11:32,967 --> 00:11:36,425 He didn't want us to get into trouble. He's taking the heat. 229 00:11:36,537 --> 00:11:40,166 He's doing that for us? And on the night of his date with Rita. 230 00:11:40,274 --> 00:11:42,902 Who he didn't want to bring over here. Probably because... 231 00:11:43,010 --> 00:11:46,070 let's face it... you people haven't been great with the others. 232 00:11:46,180 --> 00:11:48,944 Well, in our defense, Mom, we're not exactly dog people. 233 00:11:49,049 --> 00:11:52,109 - We've got to start being nicer. - I'm starting right now. 234 00:11:52,219 --> 00:11:54,551 - Buster, the party's not for you anymore. - Oh, okay. 235 00:11:54,655 --> 00:11:57,522 It's a "welcome Rita" party. 236 00:11:57,625 --> 00:12:00,025 I know where she works. We can pick her up and surprise her. 237 00:12:00,127 --> 00:12:03,756 You're so right. This is better than a party for me. 238 00:12:03,864 --> 00:12:06,628 Oh, come on. Grow a pair. 239 00:12:08,569 --> 00:12:12,665 You know, we need some weather balloons for this party, and maybe a tank of hydrogen. 240 00:12:12,773 --> 00:12:15,640 You know, really float those suckers. 241 00:12:15,743 --> 00:12:17,711 Meanwhile, Michael was hiding the evidence... 242 00:12:17,811 --> 00:12:20,541 wherever he could when he heard from his brother. 243 00:12:20,648 --> 00:12:24,015 Hey, friend. Gob here. We really want you at the party. 244 00:12:24,118 --> 00:12:28,145 We're really nice now. And, God, we love you. 245 00:12:28,255 --> 00:12:30,746 Damn it. 246 00:12:30,858 --> 00:12:33,383 And the family picked up Rita in the only vehicle... 247 00:12:33,494 --> 00:12:35,792 - big enough to hold them all. - Hey, hey. Excuse me. Rita? 248 00:12:35,896 --> 00:12:39,491 - I'm Rita. - We're here to pick you up for Michael. 249 00:12:39,600 --> 00:12:41,727 Uh, you can just go in the cabin. 250 00:12:45,906 --> 00:12:49,307 - Michael? - Oh, he's not here. 251 00:12:49,410 --> 00:12:52,777 - We're his family. - Oh, his family. 252 00:12:52,880 --> 00:12:55,974 - We're nice. - I'm sorry. I have to leave. 253 00:12:56,083 --> 00:12:58,415 Oh, no, you cannot leave. Drive, Lindsay! 254 00:12:58,519 --> 00:13:01,488 - Bye! - We're doing this for Michael. 255 00:13:01,588 --> 00:13:03,818 - Stop her, Buster. - What am I supposed to do? 256 00:13:03,924 --> 00:13:07,087 - Stop her! - Stop yelling at me! - I'm leaving! 257 00:13:07,194 --> 00:13:09,628 And that's when Buster noticed the seal on Rita's backpack. 258 00:13:17,137 --> 00:13:20,334 Hey, talk about cathartic. Now, that's an act break. 259 00:13:24,743 --> 00:13:27,143 Buster had overcome his fear of seals. 260 00:13:27,245 --> 00:13:30,840 Unfortunately, he'd done so by knocking out Michael's new girlfriend. 261 00:13:30,949 --> 00:13:33,417 - What the hell did you do? - You curious, Mom? 262 00:13:33,518 --> 00:13:36,316 - I can show you. - Uh, you made a mistake. 263 00:13:36,421 --> 00:13:39,219 You're human. Except for the hand. 264 00:13:39,324 --> 00:13:42,691 It's okay. She's alive. And soft. Soft and alive. 265 00:13:42,794 --> 00:13:46,093 All right, let's not add that to the charges. What'll we do? 266 00:13:46,197 --> 00:13:48,722 She's gonna tell Michael. And he won't hear the good stuff. 267 00:13:48,833 --> 00:13:50,994 He'll just hear about the beating. 268 00:13:51,102 --> 00:13:54,333 Wait. Maybe we can give her a "forget-me-now." Here you go, hot dog. 269 00:13:54,439 --> 00:13:56,907 - Take the pill. - What's a forget-me-now? 270 00:13:57,008 --> 00:13:59,442 They're pills that create a sort of temporary "forgettiness." 271 00:13:59,544 --> 00:14:02,877 If somebody finds out how you do a trick, you give them one, and they forget the whole thing. 272 00:14:02,981 --> 00:14:05,211 - Oh. - It's a mainstay of the magician's tool kit. 273 00:14:05,316 --> 00:14:07,682 Like how clowns always have a rag soaked in ether. 274 00:14:07,786 --> 00:14:10,687 Gob, this is flunitrazepam. It's a roofie. 275 00:14:10,789 --> 00:14:13,280 - Those are illegal! - Shut up, Mom. 276 00:14:13,391 --> 00:14:15,450 Don't make me give you another one of these. 277 00:14:17,061 --> 00:14:20,030 Lindsay, help me! Three! 278 00:14:23,668 --> 00:14:26,102 Back at the house, Michael finished his work... 279 00:14:26,204 --> 00:14:28,138 and, now late, rushed to pick up Rita. 280 00:14:28,239 --> 00:14:32,699 Moments later, Maeby prepared to tell Steve she wasn't ready for romance. 281 00:14:32,811 --> 00:14:35,245 Well, this sends a mixed message. 282 00:14:35,346 --> 00:14:38,110 Just as Steve showed up to call things off with his cousin. 283 00:14:38,216 --> 00:14:40,878 - You did all this for me? - Yes. 284 00:14:40,985 --> 00:14:44,318 Well, I'm gonna go get sexy. 285 00:14:47,025 --> 00:14:49,585 And Michael missed Rita. 286 00:14:51,696 --> 00:14:54,927 Damn it. Strike two. 287 00:14:56,033 --> 00:14:58,662 Take it down. We don't want anything that says Rita. 288 00:14:58,770 --> 00:15:01,671 Hi. It's Michael. I will be coming to the party... 289 00:15:01,773 --> 00:15:04,765 because I love you too. 290 00:15:04,876 --> 00:15:07,401 Okay. We need a new banner. 291 00:15:07,512 --> 00:15:10,208 And that's when Michael found Rita. 292 00:15:10,315 --> 00:15:12,215 Rita. 293 00:15:12,317 --> 00:15:14,842 - Why am I on a bus bench, Michael? - I get it. 294 00:15:14,953 --> 00:15:18,946 I'm sorry. But the rest of the night's gonna be all about you, I promise. 295 00:15:19,057 --> 00:15:20,957 Great. Great. 296 00:15:21,059 --> 00:15:23,254 I am gonna have to make one quick stop, maybe you'd just wait in the car. 297 00:15:23,361 --> 00:15:25,852 It's just gonna be two seconds, I promise. 298 00:15:25,964 --> 00:15:28,797 And so Michael raced up to pay his quick respects to Buster. 299 00:15:28,900 --> 00:15:31,596 Ah, there he is... my favorite son. 300 00:15:31,703 --> 00:15:34,001 - Everybody's favorite son! - Mr. Wonderful! 301 00:15:34,105 --> 00:15:37,438 Well, I had a great time. I wish I could've stayed longer. 302 00:15:37,542 --> 00:15:40,602 This is a great party, huh? Tell Buster I stopped by, please. 303 00:15:40,712 --> 00:15:42,703 - I do have to leave. - Oh, no, no, no. 304 00:15:42,814 --> 00:15:45,874 The party is not for Buster anymore. 305 00:15:45,984 --> 00:15:47,884 - No, Michael. It's for you. - Me. 306 00:15:47,986 --> 00:15:50,784 Take a look at banner, Michael! 307 00:15:50,889 --> 00:15:54,655 You guys did all of this for me? "Family love"... 308 00:15:54,759 --> 00:15:57,819 - Michael? - Everyone froze. 309 00:15:57,929 --> 00:16:01,456 Michael feared he'd been caught in a lie about his family. 310 00:16:01,566 --> 00:16:03,625 His family feared they'd been caught... 311 00:16:03,735 --> 00:16:07,535 by a woman they clubbed, drugged and left on a bench. 312 00:16:07,639 --> 00:16:09,539 It was awkward. 313 00:16:09,641 --> 00:16:12,439 - Who's this? - Mother! Mother! 314 00:16:12,544 --> 00:16:15,604 This is from the army. I have to report for duty tomorrow! 315 00:16:15,713 --> 00:16:17,977 It says by accepting this medal, I was reenlisting. 316 00:16:18,082 --> 00:16:19,982 I didn't hear them say that. 317 00:16:20,084 --> 00:16:22,609 Perhaps if the sergeant had spoken more slowly, she would have. 318 00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:25,450 In acceptance of this medal, you proudly waive all rights to private citizenship... 319 00:16:25,557 --> 00:16:28,082 and hereby reenlist in the armed services of the United States. 320 00:16:28,192 --> 00:16:30,092 If you agree with this, say thank you. 321 00:16:30,194 --> 00:16:32,560 Thank you. 322 00:16:32,664 --> 00:16:35,827 What am I gonna do? I can't go back there. I've never been! 323 00:16:35,934 --> 00:16:39,062 - Who are these people? - This is my family. 324 00:16:39,170 --> 00:16:41,604 No. No. I don't like these people. 325 00:16:41,706 --> 00:16:44,675 Me. You mean... She means me. Because I lied... 326 00:16:44,776 --> 00:16:48,678 about having a family, because I was embarrassed by them. 327 00:16:48,780 --> 00:16:50,680 And I'm ashamed of that. 328 00:16:50,782 --> 00:16:52,682 I have to leave. 329 00:16:55,620 --> 00:16:57,451 Strike three. 330 00:16:57,555 --> 00:17:00,683 You said you didn't have a family? 331 00:17:00,792 --> 00:17:04,023 - Everybody's favorite son. - Mr. Terrible. 332 00:17:06,564 --> 00:17:08,464 And her? Too good for us? Huh. 333 00:17:08,566 --> 00:17:10,761 Buster, you should've finished the job. 334 00:17:10,868 --> 00:17:14,133 - Job? What job? - Did I say job? I meant Gob. 335 00:17:14,238 --> 00:17:17,571 Buster's the one that hit her. I just gave her the roofie. 336 00:17:17,675 --> 00:17:19,438 - Roofie? - Forget-me-now. 337 00:17:19,544 --> 00:17:21,444 You beat and drugged Rita? 338 00:17:24,349 --> 00:17:25,941 - Take this and love us again. - No, no, no! 339 00:17:26,050 --> 00:17:28,109 - Just take it! - No, Gob! 340 00:17:28,219 --> 00:17:30,483 Um, I'm leaving too. 341 00:17:32,156 --> 00:17:36,217 Well, no good deed goes unpunished. 342 00:17:36,327 --> 00:17:38,295 Oh, look, it's not all bad. 343 00:17:38,396 --> 00:17:42,127 I got Buster feeling better about his... medal. 344 00:17:42,233 --> 00:17:45,293 Not anymore. I'm getting rid of this thing. 345 00:17:45,403 --> 00:17:48,668 It has caused me nothing but pride and self-respect! 346 00:17:48,773 --> 00:17:50,900 Buster went to get rid of the medal... 347 00:17:51,009 --> 00:17:52,943 he finally felt he deserved... 348 00:17:53,044 --> 00:17:55,979 but it was exactly when George Sr. was making his escape. 349 00:17:56,080 --> 00:17:58,241 Farewell to you all! 350 00:18:01,185 --> 00:18:04,746 But it turns out that hydrogen is more explosive than helium. 351 00:18:14,432 --> 00:18:17,595 And George Michael came home to find an unconscious Steve Holt. 352 00:18:17,702 --> 00:18:20,603 - What have you guys been doing? - I gave him a roofie. 353 00:18:20,705 --> 00:18:22,639 A girl's gotta grow up sometime. 354 00:18:22,740 --> 00:18:25,106 - He's your cousin! - My cousin? 355 00:18:25,209 --> 00:18:29,543 I should have told you that. Now you've drugged him and had your way with him. 356 00:18:29,647 --> 00:18:33,378 - How is that even possible? - No, George Michael. We didn't do anything. 357 00:18:33,484 --> 00:18:35,975 I just wanted him to think we did. Don't you see? 358 00:18:36,087 --> 00:18:38,715 I drugged him not to go all the way with him. 359 00:18:38,823 --> 00:18:42,384 Well, I think even the antidrug people are gonna be okay with that. 360 00:18:42,493 --> 00:18:45,894 - Well, let's get his pants back on. - You took his pants off? 361 00:18:45,997 --> 00:18:48,295 And Michael tried to salvage... 362 00:18:48,399 --> 00:18:50,731 the remains of the files from the car fire. 363 00:18:50,835 --> 00:18:53,429 - You call the attorney? - Yeah, but he's not taking our calls... 364 00:18:53,538 --> 00:18:55,631 because apparently the retainer is all used up. 365 00:18:55,740 --> 00:18:58,402 He took my call. He's very good. 366 00:18:58,509 --> 00:19:00,568 Yeah, that's how the retainer got eaten up, okay? 367 00:19:00,678 --> 00:19:02,646 The secretary took it all down here on a transcript. 368 00:19:02,747 --> 00:19:05,147 Ugh. She's very good too. 369 00:19:05,249 --> 00:19:08,082 - I'm not paying for this. - Well, what am I supposed to do? 370 00:19:08,186 --> 00:19:12,555 I don't know, Lindsay. Thing you say on page seven looks like it could be worth some money. 371 00:19:15,593 --> 00:19:17,925 - Speaking to me yet? - It's only been an hour. 372 00:19:18,029 --> 00:19:22,227 Here's what I don't understand. What were you guys doing with Rita in the first place? 373 00:19:22,333 --> 00:19:24,927 We just wanted to do something nice for you, Michael... 374 00:19:25,036 --> 00:19:27,436 'cause you do so much for us. 375 00:19:27,538 --> 00:19:29,438 I guess we screwed it up. 376 00:19:29,540 --> 00:19:32,441 No, I screwed it up, 'cause I was trying to impress her. 377 00:19:32,543 --> 00:19:34,909 Let's face it. She's probably too good for me. 378 00:19:35,012 --> 00:19:38,345 No. What you need to do is go to her and ask for another chance. 379 00:19:38,449 --> 00:19:41,179 She'd be lucky to have you, Michael. 380 00:19:43,521 --> 00:19:46,285 Thanks, Gob. Sometimes you do surprise me. 381 00:19:46,390 --> 00:19:48,858 I've got one more surprise for you. 382 00:19:51,195 --> 00:19:53,254 It ain't easy being wh... 383 00:19:53,364 --> 00:19:55,855 And Michael did try again with Rita... 384 00:19:55,967 --> 00:19:58,595 but this time determined to keep no secrets. 385 00:19:58,703 --> 00:20:01,797 I wanna tell you everything, if... if you're willing to listen. 386 00:20:01,906 --> 00:20:05,069 I'm a very good listener. 387 00:20:05,176 --> 00:20:08,543 Great. We'll start with the misdemeanors... 388 00:20:08,646 --> 00:20:12,047 and then we're gonna push right on through to the lighter treasons. 389 00:20:12,150 --> 00:20:14,345 So, 1983... 390 00:20:14,452 --> 00:20:17,216 For British eyes only... 391 00:20:19,991 --> 00:20:22,391 On the next Arrested Development. 392 00:20:22,493 --> 00:20:25,394 Lindsay tries to work off her debt with Bob Loblaw. 393 00:20:25,496 --> 00:20:27,555 I'm willing to debase myself. 394 00:20:27,665 --> 00:20:31,294 Get a maid's uniform and come by my house around 7:00. 395 00:20:31,402 --> 00:20:32,733 No way to misinterpret that. 396 00:20:32,837 --> 00:20:34,737 Except the one. 397 00:20:38,843 --> 00:20:41,744 And a traumatized Steve Holt needs a father. 398 00:20:41,846 --> 00:20:44,747 I've made a huge mistake. 399 00:20:46,951 --> 00:20:50,182 I know the feeling. I had you. 400 00:20:51,422 --> 00:20:53,583 I'm your father, Steve Holt. 401 00:20:53,691 --> 00:20:55,784 I can't hide from it anymore. 402 00:20:55,893 --> 00:20:59,294 I won't forget this, Dad. 403 00:21:06,671 --> 00:21:09,435 I will. 404 00:21:12,777 --> 00:21:14,677 I will.