1 00:00:02,134 --> 00:00:03,670 [♪♪♪] 2 00:00:06,372 --> 00:00:08,107 Everyone, it's Thursday. 3 00:00:08,107 --> 00:00:09,908 So it's time for our Monday staff meeting. 4 00:00:09,908 --> 00:00:11,544 My name is Weggie Rudlin. 5 00:00:11,544 --> 00:00:14,146 I'm the new super-duper smart, Harvard-educated president 6 00:00:14,146 --> 00:00:15,848 of entertainment at BET. 7 00:00:14,146 --> 00:00:15,848 MAN: Yep. 8 00:00:15,848 --> 00:00:17,850 Do you know why I was given this job? 9 00:00:17,850 --> 00:00:19,718 You're super-duper smart. 10 00:00:17,850 --> 00:00:19,718 Yes. But why? 11 00:00:19,718 --> 00:00:21,221 Because you went to Harvard. 12 00:00:21,221 --> 00:00:24,190 Yes. But why would they want a super-duper smart guy 13 00:00:24,190 --> 00:00:25,491 who went to Harvard to run BET? 14 00:00:25,491 --> 00:00:26,492 MAN: I know. 15 00:00:26,492 --> 00:00:28,161 [TYPING] 16 00:00:28,161 --> 00:00:29,695 [COMPUTER BEEPS] 17 00:00:29,695 --> 00:00:31,764 Because it's time to take BET in a new direction. 18 00:00:31,764 --> 00:00:33,633 Remember the first day I showed up, I asked, 19 00:00:33,633 --> 00:00:35,301 "What's your highest-rated program?" 20 00:00:35,301 --> 00:00:36,502 And you guys said: 21 00:00:36,502 --> 00:00:38,037 106 & Park with AJ and Free. 22 00:00:38,037 --> 00:00:39,105 Yes. 23 00:00:38,037 --> 00:00:39,105 MAN: Yep. 24 00:00:39,105 --> 00:00:41,574 And I said, "Great. Fire them." Why? 25 00:00:41,574 --> 00:00:43,142 Because what you call success, 26 00:00:43,142 --> 00:00:45,844 Weggie Rudlin calls failure. And vice versa. 27 00:00:45,844 --> 00:00:48,481 See, when people ask me, have I made BET a success, 28 00:00:48,481 --> 00:00:50,249 I say no. 29 00:00:50,249 --> 00:00:52,184 [SNORING] 30 00:00:50,249 --> 00:00:52,184 It's time to redefine success. 31 00:00:52,184 --> 00:00:53,853 Because once you embrace failure, 32 00:00:53,853 --> 00:00:56,189 you can't go anywhere else but up. 33 00:00:56,189 --> 00:00:58,057 That's a business theory taught at Harvard 34 00:00:58,057 --> 00:01:00,827 called "negative elevation." Now, I may be going a too fast, 35 00:01:00,827 --> 00:01:02,595 but I'm happy to slow it down. 36 00:01:02,595 --> 00:01:03,996 Are there any questions? 37 00:01:03,996 --> 00:01:05,164 Is it true that you put a ban 38 00:01:05,164 --> 00:01:07,400 on two- and three-syllable words, man? 39 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,135 Good question. Yes. 40 00:01:09,135 --> 00:01:11,170 Our research says we need to be focusing 41 00:01:11,170 --> 00:01:13,105 on the monosyllabic demographic. 42 00:01:13,105 --> 00:01:15,374 I believe lots of syllables confuses our viewers. 43 00:01:15,374 --> 00:01:17,242 Especially those in the South. 44 00:01:17,242 --> 00:01:18,378 I've got a question. 45 00:01:18,378 --> 00:01:19,879 Of course. You didn't go to Harvard. 46 00:01:19,879 --> 00:01:22,115 Do you have any experience running a network? 47 00:01:22,115 --> 00:01:23,750 Okay, see now. You're a hater. 48 00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:26,052 You're fired, so get on out of here. 49 00:01:26,052 --> 00:01:27,854 But I haven't been paid in three months. 50 00:01:27,854 --> 00:01:29,855 This is basically volunteer work for me. 51 00:01:29,855 --> 00:01:31,891 Oh. Well. Quiet down, 52 00:01:31,891 --> 00:01:33,392 so the rest of us who are getting paid 53 00:01:33,392 --> 00:01:34,393 can work, thank you. 54 00:01:34,393 --> 00:01:35,662 MAN: You're the Harvard man. 55 00:01:35,662 --> 00:01:36,895 Okay. I would like everyone 56 00:01:36,895 --> 00:01:38,665 to please look under their chairs. 57 00:01:38,665 --> 00:01:40,833 You will find a copy of the Black Panther comic book 58 00:01:40,833 --> 00:01:43,369 that I wrote. Please read it carefully. 59 00:01:43,369 --> 00:01:44,703 This is the super-cool stuff 60 00:01:44,703 --> 00:01:46,973 we'll be doing at BET from now on. 61 00:01:46,973 --> 00:01:48,741 Chicken. Are you kidding me? 62 00:01:48,741 --> 00:01:50,209 That's your complimentary lunch. 63 00:01:50,209 --> 00:01:52,545 And the orange is your new health care plan. 64 00:01:52,545 --> 00:01:54,146 Antioxidants. 65 00:01:54,146 --> 00:01:56,683 Very important. Wait. 66 00:01:57,917 --> 00:01:59,919 Nope, nope, nope. You don't get any. 67 00:01:59,919 --> 00:02:01,654 You are fired. 68 00:02:01,654 --> 00:02:03,823 Okay, let's talk about some new shows. 69 00:02:03,823 --> 00:02:06,125 As you know, we're starting BET Animation. 70 00:02:06,125 --> 00:02:07,426 Here's what I wanna see. 71 00:02:07,426 --> 00:02:08,994 I'm thinking rappers. 72 00:02:08,994 --> 00:02:10,529 Young M.C. roller skating. 73 00:02:10,529 --> 00:02:13,432 Edginess. He's going too fast. His brakes don't work. 74 00:02:13,432 --> 00:02:16,102 We'll get Tone Loc to do the voice. Okay, hm... 75 00:02:16,102 --> 00:02:18,437 How about an animated version of Hamburglar? 76 00:02:18,437 --> 00:02:21,140 He's a hungry thug. It's gritty, like The Wire. 77 00:02:21,140 --> 00:02:23,776 He does a drive-by on Burger King. 78 00:02:23,776 --> 00:02:25,245 McDonald's can co-finance. 79 00:02:25,245 --> 00:02:27,847 We'll call it, Beef. Wait a minute. 80 00:02:27,847 --> 00:02:30,015 I'm seeing a Flintstones thing happening here. 81 00:02:30,015 --> 00:02:32,718 Dino could be a rottweiler, maybe a pit bull. 82 00:02:32,718 --> 00:02:34,320 Instead of Bedrock, we're in Africa. 83 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,955 We're keeping it real. You got that? 84 00:02:36,955 --> 00:02:37,957 Got it, Weggie. 85 00:02:37,957 --> 00:02:39,926 All right. Next stop: reality. 86 00:02:39,926 --> 00:02:41,226 The Ruckus Reality Show. 87 00:02:41,226 --> 00:02:43,296 I'm digging it, I'm feeling it. 88 00:02:43,296 --> 00:02:45,364 It's what's good. Let's do that show. 89 00:02:45,364 --> 00:02:46,765 Wait a minute. 90 00:02:46,765 --> 00:02:49,202 Is this the show about the black man who hates black people? 91 00:02:49,202 --> 00:02:50,570 I hear that tone. 92 00:02:50,570 --> 00:02:53,639 The head of Viacom personally asked me to make this show. 93 00:02:53,639 --> 00:02:55,274 He was being sarcastic. 94 00:02:55,274 --> 00:02:57,443 No! Excuse me! 95 00:02:57,443 --> 00:02:59,011 Which one of us went to Harvard, huh? 96 00:02:59,011 --> 00:03:00,312 Did you go to Harvard? 97 00:03:00,312 --> 00:03:02,514 You think you understand white humor more than me? 98 00:03:02,514 --> 00:03:03,716 You know, what? Shush. 99 00:03:03,716 --> 00:03:05,184 You don't even work here anymore. 100 00:03:05,184 --> 00:03:06,985 Now, the rest of you, get a crew. 101 00:03:06,985 --> 00:03:09,922 Get out someone crossing-- Wherever that guy's from. 102 00:03:09,922 --> 00:03:12,458 And let's make The Uncle Ruckus Show happen. 103 00:03:12,458 --> 00:03:15,194 [♪♪♪] 104 00:03:15,194 --> 00:03:17,163 ♪ I am the stone The builder refused ♪ 105 00:03:17,163 --> 00:03:18,865 ♪ I am the visual The inspiration ♪ 106 00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:20,800 ♪ That made lady Sing the blues ♪ 107 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:22,668 ♪ I'm the spark That makes your idea bright ♪ 108 00:03:22,668 --> 00:03:24,270 ♪ The same spark That lights the dark ♪ 109 00:03:24,270 --> 00:03:25,871 ♪ So that you can know Left from right ♪ 110 00:03:25,871 --> 00:03:28,440 ♪ I am the ballot in your box The bullet in the gun ♪ 111 00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:29,942 ♪ The inner glow That lets you know ♪ 112 00:03:29,942 --> 00:03:31,110 ♪ To call your brother sun ♪ 113 00:03:31,110 --> 00:03:32,411 ♪ The story that just begun ♪ 114 00:03:32,411 --> 00:03:33,780 ♪ The promise Of what's to come ♪ 115 00:03:33,780 --> 00:03:34,980 ♪ And I'm 'a remain a soldier ♪ 116 00:03:34,980 --> 00:03:36,849 ♪ Till the war is won Won ♪ 117 00:03:36,849 --> 00:03:39,518 ♪ Chop, chop, chop Judo flip ♪ 118 00:03:39,518 --> 00:03:42,021 ♪ Chop, chop, chop Judo flip ♪ 119 00:03:42,021 --> 00:03:44,557 ♪ Chop, chop, chop Judo flip ♪ 120 00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,192 ♪ Chop, chop, chop ♪ 121 00:03:47,660 --> 00:03:49,562 [♪♪♪] 122 00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:51,097 [BUZZES] 123 00:03:51,097 --> 00:03:52,765 RUCKUS: I wake up at a quarter to 5 124 00:03:52,765 --> 00:03:54,267 in the a.m. every morning. 125 00:03:54,267 --> 00:03:57,002 That's about 12 hours before most niggas wake up. 126 00:03:57,002 --> 00:03:59,138 [SNICKERS] 127 00:03:59,138 --> 00:04:01,540 I am a very spiritual person. 128 00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:04,743 I start each day by thanking the white man for the sunrise. 129 00:04:04,743 --> 00:04:08,847 For the land I walk on. For the air I breathe. 130 00:04:08,847 --> 00:04:10,917 I also apologize for niggas. 131 00:04:10,917 --> 00:04:14,754 But Lord knows they ain't gonna apologize for themselves. 132 00:04:14,754 --> 00:04:18,457 I am not black. Nor do I consider myself to be black. 133 00:04:18,457 --> 00:04:20,326 Many people mistake me for being Negro 134 00:04:20,326 --> 00:04:22,495 because they don't know that I am currently living 135 00:04:22,495 --> 00:04:25,564 with the heartbreak of revitiligo. 136 00:04:25,564 --> 00:04:27,099 That's a skin condition 137 00:04:27,099 --> 00:04:29,134 that's the opposite of what Michael Jackson's got. 138 00:04:29,134 --> 00:04:31,170 Every morning, I apply the topical ointment 139 00:04:31,170 --> 00:04:32,972 made of bleach and sulfur. 140 00:04:32,972 --> 00:04:34,640 I like to think it works. 141 00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:38,143 Luckily, I hadn't gotten much darker in the last few years. 142 00:04:38,143 --> 00:04:41,314 As you can see here, I enjoy building small shrines 143 00:04:41,314 --> 00:04:44,750 to certain special white people who are important in my life. 144 00:04:44,750 --> 00:04:47,820 This one here is dedicated to John Wayne. 145 00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:49,321 Great white man. 146 00:04:49,321 --> 00:04:53,059 Didn't take no shit from niggas, Injuns, nor Mexicans. 147 00:04:53,059 --> 00:04:55,461 And this one here is for George Bush the first. 148 00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:56,896 Loved him. 149 00:04:56,896 --> 00:04:58,631 Now, this one here is dedicated 150 00:04:58,631 --> 00:05:02,534 to the most soulful soul singer to ever live. 151 00:05:02,534 --> 00:05:04,804 [♪♪♪] 152 00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:07,940 Yeah, I work about 32 jobs over the course of a week. 153 00:05:07,940 --> 00:05:10,243 I think it's interesting I got 32 jobs 154 00:05:10,243 --> 00:05:12,311 when most niggas say they can't find one. 155 00:05:12,311 --> 00:05:13,579 [LAUGHS] 156 00:05:13,579 --> 00:05:14,647 Uh, niggas. 157 00:05:17,483 --> 00:05:19,651 And one of the great pleasures of my day 158 00:05:19,651 --> 00:05:22,855 is taking all these pretty little white children to school 159 00:05:22,855 --> 00:05:24,123 in the morning. 160 00:05:24,123 --> 00:05:26,892 Hey, there-- 161 00:05:24,123 --> 00:05:26,892 Move out of my way, fat boy. 162 00:05:26,892 --> 00:05:29,061 I keep the bus nice and clean for 'em. 163 00:05:29,061 --> 00:05:30,763 These kids-- Oh, excuse me, excuse me-- 164 00:05:30,763 --> 00:05:32,231 Oh, hello there, Miss Matheson-- 165 00:05:32,231 --> 00:05:34,833 Whatever. 166 00:05:32,231 --> 00:05:34,833 How is my little sunshine? 167 00:05:34,833 --> 00:05:36,769 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold it right there. 168 00:05:36,769 --> 00:05:38,438 Hey, man, stop. 169 00:05:36,769 --> 00:05:38,438 Where's the gun, huh? 170 00:05:38,438 --> 00:05:39,972 Where's the gun? Go on, get. 171 00:05:39,972 --> 00:05:41,140 Get. Get out of here. 172 00:05:41,140 --> 00:05:43,343 Go do your little hyphy-phyphy dances 173 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,445 and nigga monkey shuffle somewhere else. 174 00:05:45,445 --> 00:05:47,647 This here bus is for kids with a future. 175 00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:52,885 That's right. That's right. 176 00:05:52,885 --> 00:05:55,388 Get your lazy asses some exercise. 177 00:05:55,388 --> 00:05:57,156 Y'all should just go be rappers. 178 00:05:57,156 --> 00:05:59,625 Get into a beef and then shoot each other. 179 00:05:59,625 --> 00:06:00,727 [CACKLES] 180 00:06:03,629 --> 00:06:07,066 Desegregation ruined the American school system. 181 00:06:07,066 --> 00:06:09,301 When did test scores across the country drop? 182 00:06:09,301 --> 00:06:10,736 After desegregation. 183 00:06:10,736 --> 00:06:13,372 When did drug use and violence in schools go up? 184 00:06:13,372 --> 00:06:14,740 After desegregation. 185 00:06:14,740 --> 00:06:17,209 There were never no white kids shooting up nothing 186 00:06:17,209 --> 00:06:19,912 before they started going to school with niggas. 187 00:06:19,912 --> 00:06:22,315 These little angels wouldn't even know what a gun was. 188 00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:23,516 [ALL YELLING] 189 00:06:23,516 --> 00:06:27,419 The white man is a peace-loving man. 190 00:06:27,419 --> 00:06:29,889 People say the key to fixing the problems of Negroes 191 00:06:29,889 --> 00:06:31,190 is education. 192 00:06:31,190 --> 00:06:34,226 But I say education is not the answer. 193 00:06:34,226 --> 00:06:35,561 Why bother? 194 00:06:35,561 --> 00:06:38,264 And what do niggas do in college anyway? 195 00:06:38,264 --> 00:06:40,266 Oh, they go there. They party. 196 00:06:40,266 --> 00:06:41,968 Get drunk for four, five years, 197 00:06:41,968 --> 00:06:45,771 and end up just as ignorant as when they came in. 198 00:06:45,771 --> 00:06:48,441 You ever seen these nigga fraternities and sororities? 199 00:06:48,441 --> 00:06:49,875 You ever seen these things? 200 00:06:49,875 --> 00:06:52,511 Silliest shit I ever seen in my life. 201 00:06:52,511 --> 00:06:54,747 You think Aristotle turned to Achilles and said: 202 00:06:54,747 --> 00:06:56,515 "Hey, let's create a fraternity 203 00:06:56,515 --> 00:06:59,218 and jump up and down, barking like dogs"? 204 00:06:59,218 --> 00:07:00,719 Hell no. 205 00:07:00,719 --> 00:07:02,922 White man out there getting Nobel Prizes 206 00:07:02,922 --> 00:07:05,457 and doing business deals in the fraternities. 207 00:07:05,457 --> 00:07:07,727 Niggas jumping up and down with candy canes, 208 00:07:07,727 --> 00:07:11,797 and doing all kinds of silly shit with their hands. 209 00:07:11,797 --> 00:07:14,566 People say there's no difference between the races. 210 00:07:14,566 --> 00:07:15,901 Well, I'll tell you what, 211 00:07:15,901 --> 00:07:18,370 I've been cleaning bathrooms for a long time. 212 00:07:18,370 --> 00:07:20,372 And I can say...white-man shit 213 00:07:20,372 --> 00:07:21,607 just don't smell the same 214 00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:23,375 as black African shit. 215 00:07:23,375 --> 00:07:25,611 See, the white man just got a better liver. 216 00:07:25,611 --> 00:07:27,146 White man eats his meat raw. 217 00:07:27,146 --> 00:07:29,081 See, that's healthier. He calls it tartare. 218 00:07:30,249 --> 00:07:31,717 Well, how you doing this fine day? 219 00:07:31,717 --> 00:07:33,218 [SCREAMS] 220 00:07:33,218 --> 00:07:35,521 May I say your dookie smells like sparkling ice water. 221 00:07:35,521 --> 00:07:37,556 Jesus! 222 00:07:35,521 --> 00:07:37,556 With a twist of lime. 223 00:07:37,556 --> 00:07:40,459 See. That's why he don't have to wash his hands neither. 224 00:07:40,459 --> 00:07:44,831 Yes, sir. White man has impeccable hygiene. 225 00:07:44,831 --> 00:07:47,132 Hey, there, little mulatto girl. 226 00:07:47,132 --> 00:07:48,300 You waiting on your daddy? 227 00:07:48,300 --> 00:07:49,435 Yes. 228 00:07:49,435 --> 00:07:50,703 [LAUGHS] 229 00:07:50,703 --> 00:07:52,404 Guess she talking about her daddy, Tom. 230 00:07:52,404 --> 00:07:53,605 He married to a white woman. 231 00:07:53,605 --> 00:07:54,940 Lucky son of a bitch. 232 00:07:54,940 --> 00:07:55,875 There he is. 233 00:07:56,575 --> 00:07:57,843 [TIRES SQUEAL] 234 00:07:57,843 --> 00:08:00,946 [BREATHLESSLY] Sorry I'm late, pumpkin. 235 00:08:00,946 --> 00:08:02,515 [SNICKERS] 236 00:08:02,515 --> 00:08:06,418 Lord have mercy. Tom, is you wearing a skirt? 237 00:08:06,418 --> 00:08:09,255 This isn't a skirt, Ruckus. It's a kilt. 238 00:08:09,255 --> 00:08:11,591 [IN SCOTTISH ACCENT] It's part of my Scottish heritage. 239 00:08:11,591 --> 00:08:12,892 Now, you stop that right now. 240 00:08:12,892 --> 00:08:14,727 That's blasphemy against Mel Gibson 241 00:08:14,727 --> 00:08:16,161 and the proud Scottish people. 242 00:08:16,161 --> 00:08:17,629 Mel Gibson isn't Scottish. 243 00:08:17,629 --> 00:08:18,764 Hush your mouth. 244 00:08:18,764 --> 00:08:20,366 The Scottish man deserves better 245 00:08:20,366 --> 00:08:22,368 than you making a mockery of his history. 246 00:08:22,368 --> 00:08:24,270 But, Ruckus, I am part Scottish. 247 00:08:24,270 --> 00:08:26,205 Thirty two point five percent, actually. 248 00:08:26,205 --> 00:08:28,474 I just found out. I took one of those tests 249 00:08:28,474 --> 00:08:29,775 where they trace your DNA 250 00:08:29,775 --> 00:08:32,344 and tell you your exact ethnic makeup. 251 00:08:32,344 --> 00:08:34,013 It's fun. You should try it. 252 00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:36,382 You 30 percent Scottish? Black as you is? 253 00:08:36,382 --> 00:08:37,550 [LAUGHING] I know. 254 00:08:37,550 --> 00:08:38,951 Is this a white doctor or a darky 255 00:08:38,951 --> 00:08:39,985 that gave you this test? 256 00:08:39,985 --> 00:08:41,187 Mm, not that it matters, 257 00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:42,821 but, yes, he was white. 258 00:08:42,821 --> 00:08:44,723 Well, hell, that's all you had to say. 259 00:08:44,723 --> 00:08:47,459 A white doctor is 99.9 percent reliable. 260 00:08:47,459 --> 00:08:49,127 Black doctor is an oxymoron. 261 00:08:49,127 --> 00:08:50,562 Unless it's a witch doctor. 262 00:08:50,562 --> 00:08:52,230 [SNICKERS] 263 00:08:52,230 --> 00:08:53,832 Well, well, well. Who knows? 264 00:08:53,832 --> 00:08:55,901 Maybe I'll take me one of them tests. 265 00:08:55,901 --> 00:08:57,436 I mean, why should Alex Haley 266 00:08:57,436 --> 00:09:00,005 be the only person to discover their roots, you know? 267 00:09:00,005 --> 00:09:01,673 [CHUCKLES] 268 00:09:00,005 --> 00:09:01,673 Huh? 269 00:09:01,673 --> 00:09:02,841 I'm-- I'm sorry. Alex what? 270 00:09:02,841 --> 00:09:05,510 You know. Alex Haley. Roots. 271 00:09:05,510 --> 00:09:07,346 What is that, some kind of gardening show? 272 00:09:07,346 --> 00:09:08,947 You're joking, right? 273 00:09:08,947 --> 00:09:11,917 Roots. You know, Roots. 274 00:09:11,917 --> 00:09:13,518 Uh-- I-- I don't follow you. 275 00:09:13,518 --> 00:09:14,954 Roots. Roots. Roots. 276 00:09:14,954 --> 00:09:16,255 You've never heard of Roots? 277 00:09:16,255 --> 00:09:18,790 The miniseries? Come here, honey. 278 00:09:18,790 --> 00:09:20,259 Hold-- Hold on, here. 279 00:09:20,259 --> 00:09:22,060 [CHANTS] 280 00:09:22,060 --> 00:09:23,329 Roots. 281 00:09:22,060 --> 00:09:23,329 I don't know nothing 282 00:09:23,329 --> 00:09:25,864 about what you talking about. 283 00:09:25,864 --> 00:09:27,833 Now, the first thing you should know about me 284 00:09:27,833 --> 00:09:29,969 is that I have a case of the revitiligo. 285 00:09:29,969 --> 00:09:31,937 It's the opposite of what Michael Jackson got. 286 00:09:31,937 --> 00:09:33,939 No, see, I'm not that kind of doctor. 287 00:09:33,939 --> 00:09:36,742 I'm more of a scientist or a technician. 288 00:09:36,742 --> 00:09:38,010 We can trace genetic markers 289 00:09:38,010 --> 00:09:39,478 to different regions of the world 290 00:09:39,478 --> 00:09:41,413 and know exactly what your makeup is. 291 00:09:41,413 --> 00:09:43,816 Well, don't let this here outer shell fool you. 292 00:09:43,816 --> 00:09:45,351 I'm as white as they come. 293 00:09:45,351 --> 00:09:47,520 My favorite movies are Gone with the Wind 294 00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:49,521 and Notting Hill. 295 00:09:49,521 --> 00:09:51,590 [♪♪♪] 296 00:09:51,590 --> 00:09:52,825 WEGGIE: Mistress Lee'vil, 297 00:09:52,825 --> 00:09:54,126 remember when you asked us 298 00:09:54,126 --> 00:09:56,061 for a way to destroy the minds of black children 299 00:09:56,061 --> 00:09:57,429 at an even younger age? 300 00:09:56,061 --> 00:09:57,429 Oh, sure. 301 00:09:57,429 --> 00:10:00,633 Well, you'll be happy to know that I started BET Animation 302 00:10:00,633 --> 00:10:02,067 to do just that. 303 00:10:02,067 --> 00:10:03,802 Splendid. Oh, I love cartoons. 304 00:10:03,802 --> 00:10:05,404 Especially evil ones. 305 00:10:05,404 --> 00:10:08,039 Yeah. Mistress Lee'vil. We have a kids show coming on 306 00:10:08,039 --> 00:10:11,310 called Super Cyborg Mandingo Man. Yeah. 307 00:10:11,310 --> 00:10:14,413 We go there. He's an African warrior. 308 00:10:14,413 --> 00:10:15,881 Yes, yes. Get to the evil part. 309 00:10:15,881 --> 00:10:17,416 Well, maybe I should just show you. 310 00:10:17,416 --> 00:10:19,785 We have the pilot. 311 00:10:17,416 --> 00:10:19,785 What's that, the script? 312 00:10:19,785 --> 00:10:22,321 Actually, we spent all our money on the Vin Diesel show. 313 00:10:22,321 --> 00:10:23,989 Oh, my God, he's so awesome. 314 00:10:23,989 --> 00:10:26,959 So we got to do this one with a flip book. 315 00:10:26,959 --> 00:10:28,894 Hm. Well, it certainly is incompetent. 316 00:10:28,894 --> 00:10:31,730 But we're missing something. What are we missing, people? 317 00:10:31,730 --> 00:10:33,833 A budget? 318 00:10:31,730 --> 00:10:33,833 Uh, yes, but no. 319 00:10:33,833 --> 00:10:35,167 Talent? 320 00:10:33,833 --> 00:10:35,167 Yes, but no. 321 00:10:35,167 --> 00:10:36,301 A work ethic? 322 00:10:35,167 --> 00:10:36,301 Pride? 323 00:10:36,301 --> 00:10:37,302 Self-respect? 324 00:10:37,302 --> 00:10:38,570 What network do you work for? 325 00:10:38,570 --> 00:10:39,672 BET. 326 00:10:39,672 --> 00:10:40,939 And what does that stand for? 327 00:10:40,939 --> 00:10:42,074 Black Entertainment-- 328 00:10:42,074 --> 00:10:44,342 No! 329 00:10:44,342 --> 00:10:47,546 Black Evil Television. 330 00:10:47,546 --> 00:10:50,015 It's not enough that the shows are bad. 331 00:10:50,015 --> 00:10:52,984 They have to be evil as well. 332 00:10:52,984 --> 00:10:55,054 Send in my evil henchmen! 333 00:10:55,921 --> 00:10:57,489 These are my evil henchmen: 334 00:10:57,489 --> 00:11:00,259 Big Nigga and Crazy Bitch. 335 00:11:00,259 --> 00:11:01,594 Big Nigga, Crazy Bitch, 336 00:11:01,594 --> 00:11:04,163 teach this person the meaning of black and evil. 337 00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:05,497 [BOTH GASP] 338 00:11:05,497 --> 00:11:07,032 Oh no, this mizzle didn't. 339 00:11:07,032 --> 00:11:09,335 No. Mistress Lee'vil, please. 340 00:11:09,335 --> 00:11:11,070 We'll make it more evil, I promise. 341 00:11:11,070 --> 00:11:13,138 Oh. Hell, no, this motherfucker gonna-- 342 00:11:13,138 --> 00:11:14,640 [SCREAMS] 343 00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,142 Weggie, please! Save me! 344 00:11:17,142 --> 00:11:18,977 [SCREAMING] 345 00:11:17,142 --> 00:11:18,977 [HUMS] 346 00:11:18,977 --> 00:11:20,346 [HOWLS] 347 00:11:25,551 --> 00:11:27,186 [SNICKERS] 348 00:11:25,551 --> 00:11:27,186 [SCREAMING] 349 00:11:28,587 --> 00:11:30,555 Ah-- Ah-- 350 00:11:28,587 --> 00:11:30,555 LEE'VIL: Mr. Weggie Rudlin. 351 00:11:30,555 --> 00:11:32,324 Ah-- Huh? 352 00:11:32,324 --> 00:11:35,060 This Uncle Ruckus show, how's it going? 353 00:11:35,060 --> 00:11:38,330 Uh...great. F-fantastic. 354 00:11:38,330 --> 00:11:40,833 Is it evil? 355 00:11:40,833 --> 00:11:42,200 Oh, absolutely. 356 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:44,636 I hope so, Weggie... 357 00:11:44,636 --> 00:11:46,338 for your sake. 358 00:11:46,338 --> 00:11:47,273 [♪♪♪] 359 00:11:53,345 --> 00:11:54,713 Because if it's not evil, then, 360 00:11:54,713 --> 00:11:55,981 you know what's gonna happen. 361 00:11:58,117 --> 00:12:00,219 And by "happen," I mean you'll be killed, 362 00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:01,820 or at least very seriously injured. 363 00:12:01,820 --> 00:12:04,890 So-- So, you know, just make sure it's evil. 364 00:12:06,158 --> 00:12:07,660 Ah. Here it is. 365 00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,961 My test results. Can you hear my heart beating? 366 00:12:09,961 --> 00:12:13,165 Oh, the white-man science is amazing, ain't it? 367 00:12:13,165 --> 00:12:14,100 [♪♪♪] 368 00:12:16,935 --> 00:12:18,537 Oh, no. N-- 369 00:12:18,537 --> 00:12:21,106 Th-- This-- This can't be. 370 00:12:21,106 --> 00:12:24,476 It says, I'm 102 percent African. 371 00:12:24,476 --> 00:12:26,945 With a 2 percent margin of error. 372 00:12:26,945 --> 00:12:29,047 Why, Lord? 373 00:12:29,047 --> 00:12:31,450 Why, Lord, why? 374 00:12:34,719 --> 00:12:36,288 [CACKLES] 375 00:12:34,719 --> 00:12:36,288 RUCKUS: I got something 376 00:12:36,288 --> 00:12:37,690 for a fraternity of niggas: 377 00:12:37,690 --> 00:12:39,591 a fraternity of bananas up a tree. 378 00:12:39,591 --> 00:12:42,093 [BARKS, CACKLING] 379 00:12:39,591 --> 00:12:42,093 WEGGIE: Bananas. 380 00:12:42,093 --> 00:12:44,196 Black fraternities should have an African name. 381 00:12:44,196 --> 00:12:45,964 Like Boogie, Boogie. 382 00:12:44,196 --> 00:12:45,964 WEGGIE: Black fraternity. 383 00:12:45,964 --> 00:12:47,365 Boogie, Boogie, Boogie. 384 00:12:47,365 --> 00:12:48,967 Hey, I got a black fraternity for you: 385 00:12:48,967 --> 00:12:51,737 It's called prison. Jail-Phi-Jail, nigga. 386 00:12:51,737 --> 00:12:53,572 You know-- 387 00:12:51,737 --> 00:12:53,572 Jail-Phi-Jail. 388 00:12:53,572 --> 00:12:54,740 [DOOR OPENS] 389 00:12:53,572 --> 00:12:54,740 Mr. Rudlin, 390 00:12:54,740 --> 00:12:57,309 there's a problem on the Ruckus shoot. 391 00:12:57,309 --> 00:12:58,510 MAN: What's the problem? 392 00:12:58,510 --> 00:13:00,045 He hasn't gotten out of bed in three days. 393 00:13:00,045 --> 00:13:01,981 He got some bad test results or something. 394 00:13:01,981 --> 00:13:05,517 [WEGGIE SQUAWKING OVER PHONE] 395 00:13:01,981 --> 00:13:05,517 Yes. Yes. 396 00:13:05,517 --> 00:13:08,153 Yes, I know you went to Harvard. Yeah. 397 00:13:08,153 --> 00:13:10,756 Okay. He said just keep filming. 398 00:13:10,756 --> 00:13:12,191 [SIGHS] 399 00:13:12,191 --> 00:13:14,059 Well, I'm black now. 400 00:13:14,059 --> 00:13:16,762 So the first thing I did was quit all my jobs. 401 00:13:16,762 --> 00:13:18,196 [SIGHS] 402 00:13:18,196 --> 00:13:20,265 I don't know how I'm supposed to pay the bills. 403 00:13:20,265 --> 00:13:22,400 Probably have to start selling crack. 404 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:25,471 Or rapping. Or rapping about selling crack. 405 00:13:27,806 --> 00:13:31,377 You know, I might not even have revitiligo. 406 00:13:34,880 --> 00:13:36,248 [SIGHS] 407 00:13:36,248 --> 00:13:38,017 Okay, I'm black. 408 00:13:38,017 --> 00:13:39,685 What am I supposed to do now? 409 00:13:42,420 --> 00:13:44,890 So this is it, huh? Is this what you do all day? 410 00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:46,224 Sit there reading books 411 00:13:46,224 --> 00:13:48,127 that make you think better of yourself, huh? 412 00:13:48,127 --> 00:13:49,528 Black man can't get nowhere 413 00:13:49,528 --> 00:13:51,463 with his little pecan-sized mind. 414 00:13:51,463 --> 00:13:53,665 So now you can read. Now what? 415 00:13:53,665 --> 00:13:55,567 What you gonna do now? 416 00:13:53,665 --> 00:13:55,567 [SIGHS] 417 00:13:55,567 --> 00:13:57,068 [LAUGHING] Oh, uh-huh. 418 00:13:57,068 --> 00:13:59,270 Nothing. That's what I thought. 419 00:13:59,270 --> 00:14:01,873 You know why? 'Cause we niggas. Both of us. 420 00:14:01,873 --> 00:14:03,342 And that's-- 421 00:14:03,342 --> 00:14:06,111 [SOBBING] And that's all we ever gonna be. 422 00:14:06,111 --> 00:14:09,881 That's all we ever gonna be. 423 00:14:09,881 --> 00:14:12,150 So this is what I have to look forward to 424 00:14:12,150 --> 00:14:13,151 as a black man, huh? 425 00:14:13,151 --> 00:14:14,486 Just sitting around, 426 00:14:14,486 --> 00:14:16,254 playing PlayStation all day. 427 00:14:14,486 --> 00:14:16,254 [GROWLS] 428 00:14:16,254 --> 00:14:18,656 Waiting for the next Madden to come out. 429 00:14:18,656 --> 00:14:20,325 Maybe I should go out and put rims... 430 00:14:20,325 --> 00:14:23,295 Oh. 431 00:14:20,325 --> 00:14:23,295 ...and all kinds of goofy shit on my truck. 432 00:14:23,295 --> 00:14:24,829 [♪♪♪] 433 00:14:24,829 --> 00:14:26,932 RUCKUS: Oh, we probably gonna die any second now 434 00:14:26,932 --> 00:14:29,735 from one of these conditions and diseases that niggas get. 435 00:14:29,735 --> 00:14:32,271 You name it: diabetes, gout, 436 00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:34,639 high blood pressure, asthma, sickle cell-- 437 00:14:34,639 --> 00:14:38,009 Oh, Ruckus, stop. This is all in your damn head. 438 00:14:38,009 --> 00:14:40,546 You the exact same fool you were last week. 439 00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:42,948 You were black then, you're black now, 440 00:14:42,948 --> 00:14:44,750 and you're gonna be black tomorrow. 441 00:14:44,750 --> 00:14:46,585 Ain't nothing wrong with being black. 442 00:14:46,585 --> 00:14:47,686 If you give it a chance, 443 00:14:47,686 --> 00:14:49,622 you might actually like it. Mm-hm. 444 00:14:51,089 --> 00:14:52,691 Ruckus, what are we doing here? 445 00:14:52,691 --> 00:14:54,459 Well, this is what niggas do, right? 446 00:14:54,459 --> 00:14:57,863 Buy sneakers. Then, maybe later we'll buy loud stereos 447 00:14:57,863 --> 00:14:59,999 and berate women in rap lyrics. 448 00:14:59,999 --> 00:15:01,367 Is this the kind of shit 449 00:15:01,367 --> 00:15:02,967 you niggas put on your feet nowadays? 450 00:15:02,967 --> 00:15:05,237 This look like a damn astronaut shoe. 451 00:15:05,237 --> 00:15:07,305 I'm black. I'm not walking to the moon. 452 00:15:07,305 --> 00:15:09,508 I'm walking to the liquor store. 453 00:15:09,508 --> 00:15:11,443 GRANDDAD: Ruckus, stop. Come on, man. 454 00:15:11,443 --> 00:15:13,845 RUCKUS: LeBron James. Allen Iverson. 455 00:15:13,845 --> 00:15:17,783 Can I get a shoe named after a white man, please? 456 00:15:17,783 --> 00:15:20,318 Excuse me. Ahem. Darky in the zebra shirt. 457 00:15:20,318 --> 00:15:21,854 Could I get a Bruce Jenner sneaker? 458 00:15:21,854 --> 00:15:23,288 Man, to hell with this bullshit. 459 00:15:23,288 --> 00:15:24,890 You on your own. 460 00:15:24,890 --> 00:15:26,992 I'm not leaving here till I get me a shoe 461 00:15:26,992 --> 00:15:28,394 named after a white man. 462 00:15:28,394 --> 00:15:31,597 John Stockton. "Pistol" Pete Maravich. Anybody. 463 00:15:33,332 --> 00:15:36,068 MAN 1: I ain't saying I like the Democrats. I don't. 464 00:15:36,068 --> 00:15:38,437 But they sure as hell don't know what the fuck they doin'. 465 00:15:40,238 --> 00:15:42,774 The Republicans? They done fucked the country to hell. 466 00:15:42,774 --> 00:15:43,976 MAN 2: They sure did. 467 00:15:43,976 --> 00:15:45,577 BARBER: Nigga, just look at Iraq. 468 00:15:45,577 --> 00:15:47,312 President over there killing black folk. 469 00:15:47,312 --> 00:15:48,580 MAN 2: Mm-hm. They black. 470 00:15:48,580 --> 00:15:50,082 Huh. I wish they'd send me to Iraq. 471 00:15:50,082 --> 00:15:52,751 I'd tell motherfucking Bush to kiss my black ass. 472 00:15:52,751 --> 00:15:53,819 Now, that's enough. 473 00:15:53,819 --> 00:15:55,821 Time out, Negroes. Time out. 474 00:15:55,821 --> 00:15:58,890 I can't sit here and let y'all badmouth my president. 475 00:15:58,890 --> 00:16:01,126 Did any of y'all niggas hear the president 476 00:16:01,126 --> 00:16:04,663 when he said Iraq was central to the global war on terror? 477 00:16:04,663 --> 00:16:07,966 Or did y'all miss it because he wasn't speaking in baboon? 478 00:16:07,966 --> 00:16:09,901 [GIBBERS] 479 00:16:09,901 --> 00:16:12,103 Instead of sitting around here chopping the Brillo 480 00:16:12,103 --> 00:16:13,605 off each other's heads, 481 00:16:13,605 --> 00:16:15,774 y'all should've take your black asses to Iraq 482 00:16:15,774 --> 00:16:18,444 and help fight for our freedom. 483 00:16:21,613 --> 00:16:23,916 A little more off the sides, please. 484 00:16:23,916 --> 00:16:25,417 Whoa-- Whoa-- Whoa-- Whoa... 485 00:16:25,417 --> 00:16:27,252 [GROWLS] 486 00:16:25,417 --> 00:16:27,252 Damn gorilla terrorists. 487 00:16:27,252 --> 00:16:29,354 [♪♪♪] 488 00:16:29,354 --> 00:16:32,291 Just what is going on? Why have you kidnapped me? 489 00:16:32,291 --> 00:16:34,392 And now, doctor, 490 00:16:34,392 --> 00:16:37,429 we will discuss your methods of DNA testing. 491 00:16:37,429 --> 00:16:38,830 [CHUCKLES] 492 00:16:38,830 --> 00:16:40,866 No. Please. No! 493 00:16:43,701 --> 00:16:46,004 WEGGIE: Shit! Why does this always happen 494 00:16:46,004 --> 00:16:48,707 when we try to use the goddamn torture machine?! 495 00:16:48,707 --> 00:16:50,809 Can somebody please get the power back on 496 00:16:50,809 --> 00:16:52,277 so we can use the torture machine? 497 00:16:52,277 --> 00:16:54,546 MAN: I think someone forgot to pay the bill, Weggie. 498 00:16:54,546 --> 00:16:57,782 WEGGIE: Will someone pay the fucking bill?! 499 00:16:57,782 --> 00:17:01,787 ♪ The dark brown shades Of my skin ♪ 500 00:17:05,256 --> 00:17:07,659 ♪ All that color To my tears ♪ 501 00:17:05,256 --> 00:17:07,659 [GROANS] 502 00:17:09,928 --> 00:17:12,797 ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 503 00:17:12,797 --> 00:17:15,634 ♪ That splash against My hollow bones ♪ 504 00:17:15,634 --> 00:17:16,869 [GRUMBLES] 505 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:20,272 ♪ That rocks my soul ♪ 506 00:17:20,272 --> 00:17:22,006 [GRUNTS] 507 00:17:22,006 --> 00:17:24,009 What hath God wrought? 508 00:17:27,645 --> 00:17:29,214 ♪ Looking back over My false dreams ♪ 509 00:17:29,214 --> 00:17:30,448 [CRYING] 510 00:17:30,448 --> 00:17:33,518 [MEN GUFFAWING] 511 00:17:30,448 --> 00:17:33,518 MAN: Yeah, yeah. Beat his ass. 512 00:17:33,518 --> 00:17:36,621 Will you niggas please shut the hell up. 513 00:17:36,621 --> 00:17:39,091 I'm trying to watch this piece-of-shit movie. 514 00:17:40,025 --> 00:17:41,293 [SIGHS] 515 00:17:42,026 --> 00:17:43,261 [GROANS] 516 00:17:43,261 --> 00:17:44,930 [SCREAMS, CRIES] 517 00:17:48,099 --> 00:17:50,669 ♪ Somebody tell me What can I do? ♪ 518 00:17:50,669 --> 00:17:51,670 [GRUNTS] 519 00:17:53,672 --> 00:17:55,240 Ruckus, no! 520 00:17:57,943 --> 00:17:59,444 What the hell are you guys doing? 521 00:17:59,444 --> 00:18:01,013 You were gonna let him kill hisself? 522 00:18:01,013 --> 00:18:02,781 You said just keep filming, so-- 523 00:18:02,781 --> 00:18:04,049 He's the star! 524 00:18:04,049 --> 00:18:06,251 You're gonna let the star commit suicide? 525 00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:07,819 But it's...reality. I mean-- 526 00:18:07,819 --> 00:18:09,721 It's The Uncle Ruckus Show. 527 00:18:09,721 --> 00:18:12,323 If there's no Uncle Ruckus, there's no show. 528 00:18:12,323 --> 00:18:14,793 Oh, so from now on, we're supposed to stop him 529 00:18:14,793 --> 00:18:16,261 if he attempts to commit suicide? 530 00:18:16,261 --> 00:18:18,162 Yes. And I shouldn't have to tell you that. 531 00:18:18,162 --> 00:18:19,731 [CHOKING] 532 00:18:18,162 --> 00:18:19,731 You should just know it. 533 00:18:19,731 --> 00:18:21,366 Oh, shit. 534 00:18:21,366 --> 00:18:22,567 [GAGGING] 535 00:18:22,567 --> 00:18:25,303 Great. That's great. That's just great. 536 00:18:25,303 --> 00:18:27,038 [COUGHING] 537 00:18:27,038 --> 00:18:29,874 Ah, what's the point? What's the point in living? 538 00:18:29,874 --> 00:18:32,077 There's nothing to look forward to. 539 00:18:32,077 --> 00:18:34,913 Just a life of rap music and 40 ounces. 540 00:18:34,913 --> 00:18:36,515 What I'm supposed to do now, huh? 541 00:18:36,515 --> 00:18:38,416 Be somebody baby daddy? 542 00:18:38,416 --> 00:18:40,719 Hang out on the corner all day and night 543 00:18:40,719 --> 00:18:43,689 shooting dice, cops chasing me all the time. 544 00:18:43,689 --> 00:18:46,258 My body ain't made to handle a stun gun. 545 00:18:46,258 --> 00:18:49,995 Ain't got but two or three shows on TV to identify with. 546 00:18:49,995 --> 00:18:52,297 Ruckus, you make a very compelling argument. 547 00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:54,399 But I know that you're gonna get through this. 548 00:18:54,399 --> 00:18:55,967 Ha. Is this what I'm supposed 549 00:18:55,967 --> 00:18:57,469 to be reading now, huh, this? 550 00:18:57,469 --> 00:18:59,738 Vibe? The Source? Jet? 551 00:18:59,738 --> 00:19:01,305 You call this a magazine? 552 00:19:01,305 --> 00:19:03,408 Look at this. This is a pamphlet. 553 00:19:03,408 --> 00:19:05,677 "Field & Scream." National Review. 554 00:19:05,677 --> 00:19:07,078 Soldier of Fortune. 555 00:19:07,078 --> 00:19:08,813 Those are magazines. 556 00:19:08,813 --> 00:19:10,882 This is a brochure. 557 00:19:10,882 --> 00:19:13,485 Ebony. They should call this National Geographic, 558 00:19:13,485 --> 00:19:15,119 except the photos are better. 559 00:19:15,119 --> 00:19:18,290 Essence. Essence of what? Essence of ugliness. 560 00:19:18,290 --> 00:19:20,592 Ruckus, we have a saying at BET: 561 00:19:20,592 --> 00:19:22,827 "We hate black people." 562 00:19:22,827 --> 00:19:25,297 And I know you share that same sentiment. 563 00:19:25,297 --> 00:19:27,766 But I've learned how I can use my blackness 564 00:19:27,766 --> 00:19:29,501 against the black race. 565 00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:31,236 Look at BET. 566 00:19:31,236 --> 00:19:32,837 You think we put this shit on the air 567 00:19:32,837 --> 00:19:34,272 because it's entertaining? 568 00:19:34,272 --> 00:19:35,807 You think we sit down and say: 569 00:19:35,807 --> 00:19:37,942 "Hey, let's be entertaining. 570 00:19:37,942 --> 00:19:39,944 How about a Baldwin Hills reality show?" 571 00:19:39,944 --> 00:19:42,780 I have good taste. Gregory Hines is entertaining. 572 00:19:42,780 --> 00:19:45,450 Sammy Davis Jr., he's entertaining. 573 00:19:45,450 --> 00:19:47,018 You think I can relate to anything 574 00:19:47,018 --> 00:19:48,786 these young niggas have to say? 575 00:19:48,786 --> 00:19:52,924 No. We air this shit because we despise our audience. 576 00:19:52,924 --> 00:19:54,725 Are there other ways to make money? 577 00:19:54,725 --> 00:19:56,161 Yes, of course. Yes, yes, yes. 578 00:19:56,161 --> 00:19:58,696 But they all require more work. 579 00:19:58,696 --> 00:19:59,765 This is easy. 580 00:19:59,765 --> 00:20:01,132 And the only people who suffer-- 581 00:20:01,132 --> 00:20:03,468 The only people who suffer, Ruckus... 582 00:20:03,468 --> 00:20:04,803 are black children. 583 00:20:04,803 --> 00:20:07,472 I think we both can live with that. 584 00:20:07,472 --> 00:20:11,543 Weggie Rudlin, you sure do have profound insights. 585 00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:13,011 But I don't know. I-- 586 00:20:13,011 --> 00:20:16,648 I just don't think I can stand life as a darky. 587 00:20:16,648 --> 00:20:17,648 [DOOR OPENS] 588 00:20:17,648 --> 00:20:18,916 [CLEARS THROAT] 589 00:20:18,916 --> 00:20:21,820 Aha! It's you! You did this to me. 590 00:20:21,820 --> 00:20:23,755 You gave me that test. 591 00:20:23,755 --> 00:20:26,358 Yes, I know. And I came because 592 00:20:26,358 --> 00:20:27,959 there was a mistake at the lab. 593 00:20:27,959 --> 00:20:30,128 We had a black intern there I didn't know about. 594 00:20:30,128 --> 00:20:32,296 He...messed up your test. 595 00:20:32,296 --> 00:20:33,699 Here are your actual results. 596 00:20:34,899 --> 00:20:36,301 Well, I'll be. 597 00:20:36,902 --> 00:20:38,036 [MURMURING] 598 00:20:38,036 --> 00:20:39,704 [GASPS] 599 00:20:39,704 --> 00:20:42,240 Hallelujah! Hallelujah! 600 00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:44,909 How dare you mistakenly inform a man of his blackness. 601 00:20:44,909 --> 00:20:47,712 You should be ashamed to call yourself a white doctor. 602 00:20:47,712 --> 00:20:49,982 I'm...uh, sorry. 603 00:20:49,982 --> 00:20:52,884 See, Ruckus. You were worried about nothing. 604 00:20:52,884 --> 00:20:54,386 Well, Weggie, I must say, 605 00:20:54,386 --> 00:20:55,853 for a darky, you are not 606 00:20:55,853 --> 00:20:57,722 that difficult to hang around. 607 00:20:57,722 --> 00:20:59,957 Now, you said you learned all that stuff in Harvard? 608 00:20:59,957 --> 00:21:02,060 Well, I definitely didn't learn it at one of those 609 00:21:02,060 --> 00:21:03,561 historically black colleges. 610 00:21:03,561 --> 00:21:04,730 [LAUGHS] 611 00:21:04,730 --> 00:21:05,930 [BOTH CACKLING] 612 00:21:05,930 --> 00:21:08,767 Howard. 613 00:21:05,930 --> 00:21:08,767 Black college. 614 00:21:08,767 --> 00:21:11,069 Morehouse. They ought to call it Lesshouse. 615 00:21:11,069 --> 00:21:14,472 Oh, it sure feel good to be white again. 616 00:21:14,472 --> 00:21:17,275 [♪♪♪] 617 00:21:17,275 --> 00:21:18,576 I'll tell you what. 618 00:21:18,576 --> 00:21:20,878 Living even for a few days as a black man 619 00:21:20,878 --> 00:21:24,716 gave old Uncle Ruckus a whole new perspective on life. 620 00:21:24,716 --> 00:21:27,452 And a whole lot more sympathy towards colored folks, 621 00:21:27,452 --> 00:21:29,420 I'll tell you that. 622 00:21:29,420 --> 00:21:31,522 Oh, look what we have here. 623 00:21:31,522 --> 00:21:34,025 Yo, for real. We not trying to play with you today, Ruckus. 624 00:21:34,025 --> 00:21:35,559 We're trying to cross the street. 625 00:21:35,559 --> 00:21:37,262 Well, go right ahead. 626 00:21:37,262 --> 00:21:39,531 You young brothers have a blessed day. 627 00:21:39,531 --> 00:21:40,999 Assalamu alaikam. 628 00:21:45,336 --> 00:21:47,772 [WHISTLES] 629 00:21:47,772 --> 00:21:49,775 [TRUCK HORN HONKS] 630 00:21:47,772 --> 00:21:49,775 Whoa--! Whoa--! Whoa! 631 00:21:50,675 --> 00:21:53,045 [RUCKUS CACKLING] 632 00:21:57,882 --> 00:22:00,786 [♪♪♪]