1 00:00:01,226 --> 00:00:02,762 [♪♪♪] 2 00:00:05,464 --> 00:00:07,199 Everyone, it's Thursday. 3 00:00:07,199 --> 00:00:09,000 So it's time for our Monday staff meeting. 4 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:10,636 My name is Weggie Rudlin. 5 00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:13,238 I'm the new super-duper smart, Harvard-educated president 6 00:00:13,238 --> 00:00:14,940 of entertainment at BET. 7 00:00:13,238 --> 00:00:14,940 MAN: Yep. 8 00:00:14,940 --> 00:00:16,942 Do you know why I was given this job? 9 00:00:16,942 --> 00:00:18,810 You're super-duper smart. 10 00:00:16,942 --> 00:00:18,810 Yes. But why? 11 00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:20,313 Because you went to Harvard. 12 00:00:20,313 --> 00:00:23,282 Yes. But why would they want a super-duper smart guy 13 00:00:23,282 --> 00:00:24,583 who went to Harvard to run BET? 14 00:00:24,583 --> 00:00:25,584 MAN: I know. 15 00:00:25,584 --> 00:00:27,253 [TYPING] 16 00:00:27,253 --> 00:00:28,787 [COMPUTER BEEPS] 17 00:00:28,787 --> 00:00:30,856 Because it's time to take BET in a new direction. 18 00:00:30,856 --> 00:00:32,725 Remember the first day I showed up, I asked, 19 00:00:32,725 --> 00:00:34,393 "What's your highest-rated program?" 20 00:00:34,393 --> 00:00:35,594 And you guys said: 21 00:00:35,594 --> 00:00:37,129 106 & Park with AJ and Free. 22 00:00:37,129 --> 00:00:38,197 Yes. 23 00:00:37,129 --> 00:00:38,197 MAN: Yep. 24 00:00:38,197 --> 00:00:40,666 And I said, "Great. Fire them." Why? 25 00:00:40,666 --> 00:00:42,234 Because what you call success, 26 00:00:42,234 --> 00:00:44,936 Weggie Rudlin calls failure. And vice versa. 27 00:00:44,936 --> 00:00:47,573 See, when people ask me, have I made BET a success, 28 00:00:47,573 --> 00:00:49,341 I say no. 29 00:00:49,341 --> 00:00:51,276 [SNORING] 30 00:00:49,341 --> 00:00:51,276 It's time to redefine success. 31 00:00:51,276 --> 00:00:52,945 Because once you embrace failure, 32 00:00:52,945 --> 00:00:55,281 you can't go anywhere else but up. 33 00:00:55,281 --> 00:00:57,149 That's a business theory taught at Harvard 34 00:00:57,149 --> 00:00:59,919 called "negative elevation." Now, I may be going a too fast, 35 00:00:59,919 --> 00:01:01,687 but I'm happy to slow it down. 36 00:01:01,687 --> 00:01:03,088 Are there any questions? 37 00:01:03,088 --> 00:01:04,256 Is it true that you put a ban 38 00:01:04,256 --> 00:01:06,492 on two- and three-syllable words, man? 39 00:01:06,492 --> 00:01:08,227 Good question. Yes. 40 00:01:08,227 --> 00:01:10,262 Our research says we need to be focusing 41 00:01:10,262 --> 00:01:12,197 on the monosyllabic demographic. 42 00:01:12,197 --> 00:01:14,466 I believe lots of syllables confuses our viewers. 43 00:01:14,466 --> 00:01:16,334 Especially those in the South. 44 00:01:16,334 --> 00:01:17,470 I've got a question. 45 00:01:17,470 --> 00:01:18,971 Of course. You didn't go to Harvard. 46 00:01:18,971 --> 00:01:21,207 Do you have any experience running a network? 47 00:01:21,207 --> 00:01:22,842 Okay, see now. You're a hater. 48 00:01:22,842 --> 00:01:25,144 You're fired, so get on out of here. 49 00:01:25,144 --> 00:01:26,946 But I haven't been paid in three months. 50 00:01:26,946 --> 00:01:28,947 This is basically volunteer work for me. 51 00:01:28,947 --> 00:01:30,983 Oh. Well. Quiet down, 52 00:01:30,983 --> 00:01:32,484 so the rest of us who are getting paid 53 00:01:32,484 --> 00:01:33,485 can work, thank you. 54 00:01:33,485 --> 00:01:34,754 MAN: You're the Harvard man. 55 00:01:34,754 --> 00:01:35,987 Okay. I would like everyone 56 00:01:35,987 --> 00:01:37,757 to please look under their chairs. 57 00:01:37,757 --> 00:01:39,925 You will find a copy of the Black Panther comic book 58 00:01:39,925 --> 00:01:42,461 that I wrote. Please read it carefully. 59 00:01:42,461 --> 00:01:43,795 This is the super-cool stuff 60 00:01:43,795 --> 00:01:46,065 we'll be doing at BET from now on. 61 00:01:46,065 --> 00:01:47,833 Chicken. Are you kidding me? 62 00:01:47,833 --> 00:01:49,301 That's your complimentary lunch. 63 00:01:49,301 --> 00:01:51,637 And the orange is your new health care plan. 64 00:01:51,637 --> 00:01:53,238 Antioxidants. 65 00:01:53,238 --> 00:01:55,775 Very important. Wait. 66 00:01:57,009 --> 00:01:59,011 Nope, nope, nope. You don't get any. 67 00:01:59,011 --> 00:02:00,746 You are fired. 68 00:02:00,746 --> 00:02:02,915 Okay, let's talk about some new shows. 69 00:02:02,915 --> 00:02:05,217 As you know, we're starting BET Animation. 70 00:02:05,217 --> 00:02:06,518 Here's what I wanna see. 71 00:02:06,518 --> 00:02:08,086 I'm thinking rappers. 72 00:02:08,086 --> 00:02:09,621 Young M.C. roller skating. 73 00:02:09,621 --> 00:02:12,524 Edginess. He's going too fast. His brakes don't work. 74 00:02:12,524 --> 00:02:15,194 We'll get Tone Loc to do the voice. Okay, hm... 75 00:02:15,194 --> 00:02:17,529 How about an animated version of Hamburglar? 76 00:02:17,529 --> 00:02:20,232 He's a hungry thug. It's gritty, like The Wire. 77 00:02:20,232 --> 00:02:22,868 He does a drive-by on Burger King. 78 00:02:22,868 --> 00:02:24,337 McDonald's can co-finance. 79 00:02:24,337 --> 00:02:26,939 We'll call it, Beef. Wait a minute. 80 00:02:26,939 --> 00:02:29,107 I'm seeing a Flintstones thing happening here. 81 00:02:29,107 --> 00:02:31,810 Dino could be a rottweiler, maybe a pit bull. 82 00:02:31,810 --> 00:02:33,412 Instead of Bedrock, we're in Africa. 83 00:02:33,412 --> 00:02:36,047 We're keeping it real. You got that? 84 00:02:36,047 --> 00:02:37,049 Got it, Weggie. 85 00:02:37,049 --> 00:02:39,018 All right. Next stop: reality. 86 00:02:39,018 --> 00:02:40,318 The Ruckus Reality Show. 87 00:02:40,318 --> 00:02:42,388 I'm digging it, I'm feeling it. 88 00:02:42,388 --> 00:02:44,456 It's what's good. Let's do that show. 89 00:02:44,456 --> 00:02:45,857 Wait a minute. 90 00:02:45,857 --> 00:02:48,294 Is this the show about the black man who hates black people? 91 00:02:48,294 --> 00:02:49,662 I hear that tone. 92 00:02:49,662 --> 00:02:52,731 The head of Viacom personally asked me to make this show. 93 00:02:52,731 --> 00:02:54,366 He was being sarcastic. 94 00:02:54,366 --> 00:02:56,535 No! Excuse me! 95 00:02:56,535 --> 00:02:58,103 Which one of us went to Harvard, huh? 96 00:02:58,103 --> 00:02:59,404 Did you go to Harvard? 97 00:02:59,404 --> 00:03:01,606 You think you understand white humor more than me? 98 00:03:01,606 --> 00:03:02,808 You know, what? Shush. 99 00:03:02,808 --> 00:03:04,276 You don't even work here anymore. 100 00:03:04,276 --> 00:03:06,077 Now, the rest of you, get a crew. 101 00:03:06,077 --> 00:03:09,014 Get out someone crossing-- Wherever that guy's from. 102 00:03:09,014 --> 00:03:11,550 And let's make The Uncle Ruckus Show happen. 103 00:03:11,550 --> 00:03:14,286 [♪♪♪] 104 00:03:14,286 --> 00:03:16,255 ♪ I am the stone The builder refused ♪ 105 00:03:16,255 --> 00:03:17,957 ♪ I am the visual The inspiration ♪ 106 00:03:17,957 --> 00:03:19,892 ♪ That made lady Sing the blues ♪ 107 00:03:19,892 --> 00:03:21,760 ♪ I'm the spark That makes your idea bright ♪ 108 00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:23,362 ♪ The same spark That lights the dark ♪ 109 00:03:23,362 --> 00:03:24,963 ♪ So that you can know Left from right ♪ 110 00:03:24,963 --> 00:03:27,532 ♪ I am the ballot in your box The bullet in the gun ♪ 111 00:03:27,532 --> 00:03:29,034 ♪ The inner glow That lets you know ♪ 112 00:03:29,034 --> 00:03:30,202 ♪ To call your brother sun ♪ 113 00:03:30,202 --> 00:03:31,503 ♪ The story that just begun ♪ 114 00:03:31,503 --> 00:03:32,872 ♪ The promise Of what's to come ♪ 115 00:03:32,872 --> 00:03:34,072 ♪ And I'm 'a remain a soldier ♪ 116 00:03:34,072 --> 00:03:35,941 ♪ Till the war is won Won ♪ 117 00:03:35,941 --> 00:03:38,610 ♪ Chop, chop, chop Judo flip ♪ 118 00:03:38,610 --> 00:03:41,113 ♪ Chop, chop, chop Judo flip ♪ 119 00:03:41,113 --> 00:03:43,649 ♪ Chop, chop, chop Judo flip ♪ 120 00:03:43,649 --> 00:03:45,284 ♪ Chop, chop, chop ♪ 121 00:03:46,752 --> 00:03:48,654 [♪♪♪] 122 00:03:48,654 --> 00:03:50,189 [BUZZES] 123 00:03:50,189 --> 00:03:51,857 RUCKUS: I wake up at a quarter to 5 124 00:03:51,857 --> 00:03:53,359 in the a.m. every morning. 125 00:03:53,359 --> 00:03:56,094 That's about 12 hours before most niggas wake up. 126 00:03:56,094 --> 00:03:58,230 [SNICKERS] 127 00:03:58,230 --> 00:04:00,632 I am a very spiritual person. 128 00:04:00,632 --> 00:04:03,835 I start each day by thanking the white man for the sunrise. 129 00:04:03,835 --> 00:04:07,939 For the land I walk on. For the air I breathe. 130 00:04:07,939 --> 00:04:10,009 I also apologize for niggas. 131 00:04:10,009 --> 00:04:13,846 But Lord knows they ain't gonna apologize for themselves. 132 00:04:13,846 --> 00:04:17,549 I am not black. Nor do I consider myself to be black. 133 00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:19,418 Many people mistake me for being Negro 134 00:04:19,418 --> 00:04:21,587 because they don't know that I am currently living 135 00:04:21,587 --> 00:04:24,656 with the heartbreak of revitiligo. 136 00:04:24,656 --> 00:04:26,191 That's a skin condition 137 00:04:26,191 --> 00:04:28,226 that's the opposite of what Michael Jackson's got. 138 00:04:28,226 --> 00:04:30,262 Every morning, I apply the topical ointment 139 00:04:30,262 --> 00:04:32,064 made of bleach and sulfur. 140 00:04:32,064 --> 00:04:33,732 I like to think it works. 141 00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:37,235 Luckily, I hadn't gotten much darker in the last few years. 142 00:04:37,235 --> 00:04:40,406 As you can see here, I enjoy building small shrines 143 00:04:40,406 --> 00:04:43,842 to certain special white people who are important in my life. 144 00:04:43,842 --> 00:04:46,912 This one here is dedicated to John Wayne. 145 00:04:46,912 --> 00:04:48,413 Great white man. 146 00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:52,151 Didn't take no shit from niggas, Injuns, nor Mexicans. 147 00:04:52,151 --> 00:04:54,553 And this one here is for George Bush the first. 148 00:04:54,553 --> 00:04:55,988 Loved him. 149 00:04:55,988 --> 00:04:57,723 Now, this one here is dedicated 150 00:04:57,723 --> 00:05:01,626 to the most soulful soul singer to ever live. 151 00:05:01,626 --> 00:05:03,896 [♪♪♪] 152 00:05:03,896 --> 00:05:07,032 Yeah, I work about 32 jobs over the course of a week. 153 00:05:07,032 --> 00:05:09,335 I think it's interesting I got 32 jobs 154 00:05:09,335 --> 00:05:11,403 when most niggas say they can't find one. 155 00:05:11,403 --> 00:05:12,671 [LAUGHS] 156 00:05:12,671 --> 00:05:13,739 Uh, niggas. 157 00:05:16,575 --> 00:05:18,743 And one of the great pleasures of my day 158 00:05:18,743 --> 00:05:21,947 is taking all these pretty little white children to school 159 00:05:21,947 --> 00:05:23,215 in the morning. 160 00:05:23,215 --> 00:05:25,984 Hey, there-- 161 00:05:23,215 --> 00:05:25,984 Move out of my way, fat boy. 162 00:05:25,984 --> 00:05:28,153 I keep the bus nice and clean for 'em. 163 00:05:28,153 --> 00:05:29,855 These kids-- Oh, excuse me, excuse me-- 164 00:05:29,855 --> 00:05:31,323 Oh, hello there, Miss Matheson-- 165 00:05:31,323 --> 00:05:33,925 Whatever. 166 00:05:31,323 --> 00:05:33,925 How is my little sunshine? 167 00:05:33,925 --> 00:05:35,861 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold it right there. 168 00:05:35,861 --> 00:05:37,530 Hey, man, stop. 169 00:05:35,861 --> 00:05:37,530 Where's the gun, huh? 170 00:05:37,530 --> 00:05:39,064 Where's the gun? Go on, get. 171 00:05:39,064 --> 00:05:40,232 Get. Get out of here. 172 00:05:40,232 --> 00:05:42,435 Go do your little hyphy-phyphy dances 173 00:05:42,435 --> 00:05:44,537 and nigga monkey shuffle somewhere else. 174 00:05:44,537 --> 00:05:46,739 This here bus is for kids with a future. 175 00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:51,977 That's right. That's right. 176 00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:54,480 Get your lazy asses some exercise. 177 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:56,248 Y'all should just go be rappers. 178 00:05:56,248 --> 00:05:58,717 Get into a beef and then shoot each other. 179 00:05:58,717 --> 00:05:59,819 [CACKLES] 180 00:06:02,721 --> 00:06:06,158 Desegregation ruined the American school system. 181 00:06:06,158 --> 00:06:08,393 When did test scores across the country drop? 182 00:06:08,393 --> 00:06:09,828 After desegregation. 183 00:06:09,828 --> 00:06:12,464 When did drug use and violence in schools go up? 184 00:06:12,464 --> 00:06:13,832 After desegregation. 185 00:06:13,832 --> 00:06:16,301 There were never no white kids shooting up nothing 186 00:06:16,301 --> 00:06:19,004 before they started going to school with niggas. 187 00:06:19,004 --> 00:06:21,407 These little angels wouldn't even know what a gun was. 188 00:06:21,407 --> 00:06:22,608 [ALL YELLING] 189 00:06:22,608 --> 00:06:26,511 The white man is a peace-loving man. 190 00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:28,981 People say the key to fixing the problems of Negroes 191 00:06:28,981 --> 00:06:30,282 is education. 192 00:06:30,282 --> 00:06:33,318 But I say education is not the answer. 193 00:06:33,318 --> 00:06:34,653 Why bother? 194 00:06:34,653 --> 00:06:37,356 And what do niggas do in college anyway? 195 00:06:37,356 --> 00:06:39,358 Oh, they go there. They party. 196 00:06:39,358 --> 00:06:41,060 Get drunk for four, five years, 197 00:06:41,060 --> 00:06:44,863 and end up just as ignorant as when they came in. 198 00:06:44,863 --> 00:06:47,533 You ever seen these nigga fraternities and sororities? 199 00:06:47,533 --> 00:06:48,967 You ever seen these things? 200 00:06:48,967 --> 00:06:51,603 Silliest shit I ever seen in my life. 201 00:06:51,603 --> 00:06:53,839 You think Aristotle turned to Achilles and said: 202 00:06:53,839 --> 00:06:55,607 "Hey, let's create a fraternity 203 00:06:55,607 --> 00:06:58,310 and jump up and down, barking like dogs"? 204 00:06:58,310 --> 00:06:59,811 Hell no. 205 00:06:59,811 --> 00:07:02,014 White man out there getting Nobel Prizes 206 00:07:02,014 --> 00:07:04,549 and doing business deals in the fraternities. 207 00:07:04,549 --> 00:07:06,819 Niggas jumping up and down with candy canes, 208 00:07:06,819 --> 00:07:10,889 and doing all kinds of silly shit with their hands. 209 00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:13,658 People say there's no difference between the races. 210 00:07:13,658 --> 00:07:14,993 Well, I'll tell you what, 211 00:07:14,993 --> 00:07:17,462 I've been cleaning bathrooms for a long time. 212 00:07:17,462 --> 00:07:19,464 And I can say...white-man shit 213 00:07:19,464 --> 00:07:20,699 just don't smell the same 214 00:07:20,699 --> 00:07:22,467 as black African shit. 215 00:07:22,467 --> 00:07:24,703 See, the white man just got a better liver. 216 00:07:24,703 --> 00:07:26,238 White man eats his meat raw. 217 00:07:26,238 --> 00:07:28,173 See, that's healthier. He calls it tartare. 218 00:07:29,341 --> 00:07:30,809 Well, how you doing this fine day? 219 00:07:30,809 --> 00:07:32,310 [SCREAMS] 220 00:07:32,310 --> 00:07:34,613 May I say your dookie smells like sparkling ice water. 221 00:07:34,613 --> 00:07:36,648 Jesus! 222 00:07:34,613 --> 00:07:36,648 With a twist of lime. 223 00:07:36,648 --> 00:07:39,551 See. That's why he don't have to wash his hands neither. 224 00:07:39,551 --> 00:07:43,923 Yes, sir. White man has impeccable hygiene. 225 00:07:43,923 --> 00:07:46,224 Hey, there, little mulatto girl. 226 00:07:46,224 --> 00:07:47,392 You waiting on your daddy? 227 00:07:47,392 --> 00:07:48,527 Yes. 228 00:07:48,527 --> 00:07:49,795 [LAUGHS] 229 00:07:49,795 --> 00:07:51,496 Guess she talking about her daddy, Tom. 230 00:07:51,496 --> 00:07:52,697 He married to a white woman. 231 00:07:52,697 --> 00:07:54,032 Lucky son of a bitch. 232 00:07:54,032 --> 00:07:54,967 There he is. 233 00:07:55,667 --> 00:07:56,935 [TIRES SQUEAL] 234 00:07:56,935 --> 00:08:00,038 [BREATHLESSLY] Sorry I'm late, pumpkin. 235 00:08:00,038 --> 00:08:01,607 [SNICKERS] 236 00:08:01,607 --> 00:08:05,510 Lord have mercy. Tom, is you wearing a skirt? 237 00:08:05,510 --> 00:08:08,347 This isn't a skirt, Ruckus. It's a kilt. 238 00:08:08,347 --> 00:08:10,683 [IN SCOTTISH ACCENT] It's part of my Scottish heritage. 239 00:08:10,683 --> 00:08:11,984 Now, you stop that right now. 240 00:08:11,984 --> 00:08:13,819 That's blasphemy against Mel Gibson 241 00:08:13,819 --> 00:08:15,253 and the proud Scottish people. 242 00:08:15,253 --> 00:08:16,721 Mel Gibson isn't Scottish. 243 00:08:16,721 --> 00:08:17,856 Hush your mouth. 244 00:08:17,856 --> 00:08:19,458 The Scottish man deserves better 245 00:08:19,458 --> 00:08:21,460 than you making a mockery of his history. 246 00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:23,362 But, Ruckus, I am part Scottish. 247 00:08:23,362 --> 00:08:25,297 Thirty two point five percent, actually. 248 00:08:25,297 --> 00:08:27,566 I just found out. I took one of those tests 249 00:08:27,566 --> 00:08:28,867 where they trace your DNA 250 00:08:28,867 --> 00:08:31,436 and tell you your exact ethnic makeup. 251 00:08:31,436 --> 00:08:33,105 It's fun. You should try it. 252 00:08:33,105 --> 00:08:35,474 You 30 percent Scottish? Black as you is? 253 00:08:35,474 --> 00:08:36,642 [LAUGHING] I know. 254 00:08:36,642 --> 00:08:38,043 Is this a white doctor or a darky 255 00:08:38,043 --> 00:08:39,077 that gave you this test? 256 00:08:39,077 --> 00:08:40,279 Mm, not that it matters, 257 00:08:40,279 --> 00:08:41,913 but, yes, he was white. 258 00:08:41,913 --> 00:08:43,815 Well, hell, that's all you had to say. 259 00:08:43,815 --> 00:08:46,551 A white doctor is 99.9 percent reliable. 260 00:08:46,551 --> 00:08:48,219 Black doctor is an oxymoron. 261 00:08:48,219 --> 00:08:49,654 Unless it's a witch doctor. 262 00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,322 [SNICKERS] 263 00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:52,924 Well, well, well. Who knows? 264 00:08:52,924 --> 00:08:54,993 Maybe I'll take me one of them tests. 265 00:08:54,993 --> 00:08:56,528 I mean, why should Alex Haley 266 00:08:56,528 --> 00:08:59,097 be the only person to discover their roots, you know? 267 00:08:59,097 --> 00:09:00,765 [CHUCKLES] 268 00:08:59,097 --> 00:09:00,765 Huh? 269 00:09:00,765 --> 00:09:01,933 I'm-- I'm sorry. Alex what? 270 00:09:01,933 --> 00:09:04,602 You know. Alex Haley. Roots. 271 00:09:04,602 --> 00:09:06,438 What is that, some kind of gardening show? 272 00:09:06,438 --> 00:09:08,039 You're joking, right? 273 00:09:08,039 --> 00:09:11,009 Roots. You know, Roots. 274 00:09:11,009 --> 00:09:12,610 Uh-- I-- I don't follow you. 275 00:09:12,610 --> 00:09:14,046 Roots. Roots. Roots. 276 00:09:14,046 --> 00:09:15,347 You've never heard of Roots? 277 00:09:15,347 --> 00:09:17,882 The miniseries? Come here, honey. 278 00:09:17,882 --> 00:09:19,351 Hold-- Hold on, here. 279 00:09:19,351 --> 00:09:21,152 [CHANTS] 280 00:09:21,152 --> 00:09:22,421 Roots. 281 00:09:21,152 --> 00:09:22,421 I don't know nothing 282 00:09:22,421 --> 00:09:24,956 about what you talking about. 283 00:09:24,956 --> 00:09:26,925 Now, the first thing you should know about me 284 00:09:26,925 --> 00:09:29,061 is that I have a case of the revitiligo. 285 00:09:29,061 --> 00:09:31,029 It's the opposite of what Michael Jackson got. 286 00:09:31,029 --> 00:09:33,031 No, see, I'm not that kind of doctor. 287 00:09:33,031 --> 00:09:35,834 I'm more of a scientist or a technician. 288 00:09:35,834 --> 00:09:37,102 We can trace genetic markers 289 00:09:37,102 --> 00:09:38,570 to different regions of the world 290 00:09:38,570 --> 00:09:40,505 and know exactly what your makeup is. 291 00:09:40,505 --> 00:09:42,908 Well, don't let this here outer shell fool you. 292 00:09:42,908 --> 00:09:44,443 I'm as white as they come. 293 00:09:44,443 --> 00:09:46,612 My favorite movies are Gone with the Wind 294 00:09:46,612 --> 00:09:48,613 and Notting Hill. 295 00:09:48,613 --> 00:09:50,682 [♪♪♪] 296 00:09:50,682 --> 00:09:51,917 WEGGIE: Mistress Lee'vil, 297 00:09:51,917 --> 00:09:53,218 remember when you asked us 298 00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:55,153 for a way to destroy the minds of black children 299 00:09:55,153 --> 00:09:56,521 at an even younger age? 300 00:09:55,153 --> 00:09:56,521 Oh, sure. 301 00:09:56,521 --> 00:09:59,725 Well, you'll be happy to know that I started BET Animation 302 00:09:59,725 --> 00:10:01,159 to do just that. 303 00:10:01,159 --> 00:10:02,894 Splendid. Oh, I love cartoons. 304 00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:04,496 Especially evil ones. 305 00:10:04,496 --> 00:10:07,131 Yeah. Mistress Lee'vil. We have a kids show coming on 306 00:10:07,131 --> 00:10:10,402 called Super Cyborg Mandingo Man. Yeah. 307 00:10:10,402 --> 00:10:13,505 We go there. He's an African warrior. 308 00:10:13,505 --> 00:10:14,973 Yes, yes. Get to the evil part. 309 00:10:14,973 --> 00:10:16,508 Well, maybe I should just show you. 310 00:10:16,508 --> 00:10:18,877 We have the pilot. 311 00:10:16,508 --> 00:10:18,877 What's that, the script? 312 00:10:18,877 --> 00:10:21,413 Actually, we spent all our money on the Vin Diesel show. 313 00:10:21,413 --> 00:10:23,081 Oh, my God, he's so awesome. 314 00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:26,051 So we got to do this one with a flip book. 315 00:10:26,051 --> 00:10:27,986 Hm. Well, it certainly is incompetent. 316 00:10:27,986 --> 00:10:30,822 But we're missing something. What are we missing, people? 317 00:10:30,822 --> 00:10:32,925 A budget? 318 00:10:30,822 --> 00:10:32,925 Uh, yes, but no. 319 00:10:32,925 --> 00:10:34,259 Talent? 320 00:10:32,925 --> 00:10:34,259 Yes, but no. 321 00:10:34,259 --> 00:10:35,393 A work ethic? 322 00:10:34,259 --> 00:10:35,393 Pride? 323 00:10:35,393 --> 00:10:36,394 Self-respect? 324 00:10:36,394 --> 00:10:37,662 What network do you work for? 325 00:10:37,662 --> 00:10:38,764 BET. 326 00:10:38,764 --> 00:10:40,031 And what does that stand for? 327 00:10:40,031 --> 00:10:41,166 Black Entertainment-- 328 00:10:41,166 --> 00:10:43,434 No! 329 00:10:43,434 --> 00:10:46,638 Black Evil Television. 330 00:10:46,638 --> 00:10:49,107 It's not enough that the shows are bad. 331 00:10:49,107 --> 00:10:52,076 They have to be evil as well. 332 00:10:52,076 --> 00:10:54,146 Send in my evil henchmen! 333 00:10:55,013 --> 00:10:56,581 These are my evil henchmen: 334 00:10:56,581 --> 00:10:59,351 Big Nigga and Crazy Bitch. 335 00:10:59,351 --> 00:11:00,686 Big Nigga, Crazy Bitch, 336 00:11:00,686 --> 00:11:03,255 teach this person the meaning of black and evil. 337 00:11:03,255 --> 00:11:04,589 [BOTH GASP] 338 00:11:04,589 --> 00:11:06,124 Oh no, this mizzle didn't. 339 00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:08,427 No. Mistress Lee'vil, please. 340 00:11:08,427 --> 00:11:10,162 We'll make it more evil, I promise. 341 00:11:10,162 --> 00:11:12,230 Oh. Hell, no, this motherfucker gonna-- 342 00:11:12,230 --> 00:11:13,732 [SCREAMS] 343 00:11:13,732 --> 00:11:16,234 Weggie, please! Save me! 344 00:11:16,234 --> 00:11:18,069 [SCREAMING] 345 00:11:16,234 --> 00:11:18,069 [HUMS] 346 00:11:18,069 --> 00:11:19,438 [HOWLS] 347 00:11:24,643 --> 00:11:26,278 [SNICKERS] 348 00:11:24,643 --> 00:11:26,278 [SCREAMING] 349 00:11:27,679 --> 00:11:29,647 Ah-- Ah-- 350 00:11:27,679 --> 00:11:29,647 LEE'VIL: Mr. Weggie Rudlin. 351 00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:31,416 Ah-- Huh? 352 00:11:31,416 --> 00:11:34,152 This Uncle Ruckus show, how's it going? 353 00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:37,422 Uh...great. F-fantastic. 354 00:11:37,422 --> 00:11:39,925 Is it evil? 355 00:11:39,925 --> 00:11:41,292 Oh, absolutely. 356 00:11:41,292 --> 00:11:43,728 I hope so, Weggie... 357 00:11:43,728 --> 00:11:45,430 for your sake. 358 00:11:45,430 --> 00:11:46,365 [♪♪♪] 359 00:11:52,437 --> 00:11:53,805 Because if it's not evil, then, 360 00:11:53,805 --> 00:11:55,073 you know what's gonna happen. 361 00:11:57,209 --> 00:11:59,311 And by "happen," I mean you'll be killed, 362 00:11:59,311 --> 00:12:00,912 or at least very seriously injured. 363 00:12:00,912 --> 00:12:03,982 So-- So, you know, just make sure it's evil. 364 00:12:05,250 --> 00:12:06,752 Ah. Here it is. 365 00:12:06,752 --> 00:12:09,053 My test results. Can you hear my heart beating? 366 00:12:09,053 --> 00:12:12,257 Oh, the white-man science is amazing, ain't it? 367 00:12:12,257 --> 00:12:13,192 [♪♪♪] 368 00:12:16,027 --> 00:12:17,629 Oh, no. N-- 369 00:12:17,629 --> 00:12:20,198 Th-- This-- This can't be. 370 00:12:20,198 --> 00:12:23,568 It says, I'm 102 percent African. 371 00:12:23,568 --> 00:12:26,037 With a 2 percent margin of error. 372 00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:28,139 Why, Lord? 373 00:12:28,139 --> 00:12:30,542 Why, Lord, why? 374 00:12:33,811 --> 00:12:35,380 [CACKLES] 375 00:12:33,811 --> 00:12:35,380 RUCKUS: I got something 376 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:36,782 for a fraternity of niggas: 377 00:12:36,782 --> 00:12:38,683 a fraternity of bananas up a tree. 378 00:12:38,683 --> 00:12:41,185 [BARKS, CACKLING] 379 00:12:38,683 --> 00:12:41,185 WEGGIE: Bananas. 380 00:12:41,185 --> 00:12:43,288 Black fraternities should have an African name. 381 00:12:43,288 --> 00:12:45,056 Like Boogie, Boogie. 382 00:12:43,288 --> 00:12:45,056 WEGGIE: Black fraternity. 383 00:12:45,056 --> 00:12:46,457 Boogie, Boogie, Boogie. 384 00:12:46,457 --> 00:12:48,059 Hey, I got a black fraternity for you: 385 00:12:48,059 --> 00:12:50,829 It's called prison. Jail-Phi-Jail, nigga. 386 00:12:50,829 --> 00:12:52,664 You know-- 387 00:12:50,829 --> 00:12:52,664 Jail-Phi-Jail. 388 00:12:52,664 --> 00:12:53,832 [DOOR OPENS] 389 00:12:52,664 --> 00:12:53,832 Mr. Rudlin, 390 00:12:53,832 --> 00:12:56,401 there's a problem on the Ruckus shoot. 391 00:12:56,401 --> 00:12:57,602 MAN: What's the problem? 392 00:12:57,602 --> 00:12:59,137 He hasn't gotten out of bed in three days. 393 00:12:59,137 --> 00:13:01,073 He got some bad test results or something. 394 00:13:01,073 --> 00:13:04,609 [WEGGIE SQUAWKING OVER PHONE] 395 00:13:01,073 --> 00:13:04,609 Yes. Yes. 396 00:13:04,609 --> 00:13:07,245 Yes, I know you went to Harvard. Yeah. 397 00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:09,848 Okay. He said just keep filming. 398 00:13:09,848 --> 00:13:11,283 [SIGHS] 399 00:13:11,283 --> 00:13:13,151 Well, I'm black now. 400 00:13:13,151 --> 00:13:15,854 So the first thing I did was quit all my jobs. 401 00:13:15,854 --> 00:13:17,288 [SIGHS] 402 00:13:17,288 --> 00:13:19,357 I don't know how I'm supposed to pay the bills. 403 00:13:19,357 --> 00:13:21,492 Probably have to start selling crack. 404 00:13:21,492 --> 00:13:24,563 Or rapping. Or rapping about selling crack. 405 00:13:26,898 --> 00:13:30,469 You know, I might not even have revitiligo. 406 00:13:33,972 --> 00:13:35,340 [SIGHS] 407 00:13:35,340 --> 00:13:37,109 Okay, I'm black. 408 00:13:37,109 --> 00:13:38,777 What am I supposed to do now? 409 00:13:41,512 --> 00:13:43,982 So this is it, huh? Is this what you do all day? 410 00:13:43,982 --> 00:13:45,316 Sit there reading books 411 00:13:45,316 --> 00:13:47,219 that make you think better of yourself, huh? 412 00:13:47,219 --> 00:13:48,620 Black man can't get nowhere 413 00:13:48,620 --> 00:13:50,555 with his little pecan-sized mind. 414 00:13:50,555 --> 00:13:52,757 So now you can read. Now what? 415 00:13:52,757 --> 00:13:54,659 What you gonna do now? 416 00:13:52,757 --> 00:13:54,659 [SIGHS] 417 00:13:54,659 --> 00:13:56,160 [LAUGHING] Oh, uh-huh. 418 00:13:56,160 --> 00:13:58,362 Nothing. That's what I thought. 419 00:13:58,362 --> 00:14:00,965 You know why? 'Cause we niggas. Both of us. 420 00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:02,434 And that's-- 421 00:14:02,434 --> 00:14:05,203 [SOBBING] And that's all we ever gonna be. 422 00:14:05,203 --> 00:14:08,973 That's all we ever gonna be. 423 00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:11,242 So this is what I have to look forward to 424 00:14:11,242 --> 00:14:12,243 as a black man, huh? 425 00:14:12,243 --> 00:14:13,578 Just sitting around, 426 00:14:13,578 --> 00:14:15,346 playing PlayStation all day. 427 00:14:13,578 --> 00:14:15,346 [GROWLS] 428 00:14:15,346 --> 00:14:17,748 Waiting for the next Madden to come out. 429 00:14:17,748 --> 00:14:19,417 Maybe I should go out and put rims... 430 00:14:19,417 --> 00:14:22,387 Oh. 431 00:14:19,417 --> 00:14:22,387 ...and all kinds of goofy shit on my truck. 432 00:14:22,387 --> 00:14:23,921 [♪♪♪] 433 00:14:23,921 --> 00:14:26,024 RUCKUS: Oh, we probably gonna die any second now 434 00:14:26,024 --> 00:14:28,827 from one of these conditions and diseases that niggas get. 435 00:14:28,827 --> 00:14:31,363 You name it: diabetes, gout, 436 00:14:31,363 --> 00:14:33,731 high blood pressure, asthma, sickle cell-- 437 00:14:33,731 --> 00:14:37,101 Oh, Ruckus, stop. This is all in your damn head. 438 00:14:37,101 --> 00:14:39,638 You the exact same fool you were last week. 439 00:14:39,638 --> 00:14:42,040 You were black then, you're black now, 440 00:14:42,040 --> 00:14:43,842 and you're gonna be black tomorrow. 441 00:14:43,842 --> 00:14:45,677 Ain't nothing wrong with being black. 442 00:14:45,677 --> 00:14:46,778 If you give it a chance, 443 00:14:46,778 --> 00:14:48,714 you might actually like it. Mm-hm. 444 00:14:50,181 --> 00:14:51,783 Ruckus, what are we doing here? 445 00:14:51,783 --> 00:14:53,551 Well, this is what niggas do, right? 446 00:14:53,551 --> 00:14:56,955 Buy sneakers. Then, maybe later we'll buy loud stereos 447 00:14:56,955 --> 00:14:59,091 and berate women in rap lyrics. 448 00:14:59,091 --> 00:15:00,459 Is this the kind of shit 449 00:15:00,459 --> 00:15:02,059 you niggas put on your feet nowadays? 450 00:15:02,059 --> 00:15:04,329 This look like a damn astronaut shoe. 451 00:15:04,329 --> 00:15:06,397 I'm black. I'm not walking to the moon. 452 00:15:06,397 --> 00:15:08,600 I'm walking to the liquor store. 453 00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:10,535 GRANDDAD: Ruckus, stop. Come on, man. 454 00:15:10,535 --> 00:15:12,937 RUCKUS: LeBron James. Allen Iverson. 455 00:15:12,937 --> 00:15:16,875 Can I get a shoe named after a white man, please? 456 00:15:16,875 --> 00:15:19,410 Excuse me. Ahem. Darky in the zebra shirt. 457 00:15:19,410 --> 00:15:20,946 Could I get a Bruce Jenner sneaker? 458 00:15:20,946 --> 00:15:22,380 Man, to hell with this bullshit. 459 00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:23,982 You on your own. 460 00:15:23,982 --> 00:15:26,084 I'm not leaving here till I get me a shoe 461 00:15:26,084 --> 00:15:27,486 named after a white man. 462 00:15:27,486 --> 00:15:30,689 John Stockton. "Pistol" Pete Maravich. Anybody. 463 00:15:32,424 --> 00:15:35,160 MAN 1: I ain't saying I like the Democrats. I don't. 464 00:15:35,160 --> 00:15:37,529 But they sure as hell don't know what the fuck they doin'. 465 00:15:39,330 --> 00:15:41,866 The Republicans? They done fucked the country to hell. 466 00:15:41,866 --> 00:15:43,068 MAN 2: They sure did. 467 00:15:43,068 --> 00:15:44,669 BARBER: Nigga, just look at Iraq. 468 00:15:44,669 --> 00:15:46,404 President over there killing black folk. 469 00:15:46,404 --> 00:15:47,672 MAN 2: Mm-hm. They black. 470 00:15:47,672 --> 00:15:49,174 Huh. I wish they'd send me to Iraq. 471 00:15:49,174 --> 00:15:51,843 I'd tell motherfucking Bush to kiss my black ass. 472 00:15:51,843 --> 00:15:52,911 Now, that's enough. 473 00:15:52,911 --> 00:15:54,913 Time out, Negroes. Time out. 474 00:15:54,913 --> 00:15:57,982 I can't sit here and let y'all badmouth my president. 475 00:15:57,982 --> 00:16:00,218 Did any of y'all niggas hear the president 476 00:16:00,218 --> 00:16:03,755 when he said Iraq was central to the global war on terror? 477 00:16:03,755 --> 00:16:07,058 Or did y'all miss it because he wasn't speaking in baboon? 478 00:16:07,058 --> 00:16:08,993 [GIBBERS] 479 00:16:08,993 --> 00:16:11,195 Instead of sitting around here chopping the Brillo 480 00:16:11,195 --> 00:16:12,697 off each other's heads, 481 00:16:12,697 --> 00:16:14,866 y'all should've take your black asses to Iraq 482 00:16:14,866 --> 00:16:17,536 and help fight for our freedom. 483 00:16:20,705 --> 00:16:23,008 A little more off the sides, please. 484 00:16:23,008 --> 00:16:24,509 Whoa-- Whoa-- Whoa-- Whoa... 485 00:16:24,509 --> 00:16:26,344 [GROWLS] 486 00:16:24,509 --> 00:16:26,344 Damn gorilla terrorists. 487 00:16:26,344 --> 00:16:28,446 [♪♪♪] 488 00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:31,383 Just what is going on? Why have you kidnapped me? 489 00:16:31,383 --> 00:16:33,484 And now, doctor, 490 00:16:33,484 --> 00:16:36,521 we will discuss your methods of DNA testing. 491 00:16:36,521 --> 00:16:37,922 [CHUCKLES] 492 00:16:37,922 --> 00:16:39,958 No. Please. No! 493 00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:45,096 WEGGIE: Shit! Why does this always happen 494 00:16:45,096 --> 00:16:47,799 when we try to use the goddamn torture machine?! 495 00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:49,901 Can somebody please get the power back on 496 00:16:49,901 --> 00:16:51,369 so we can use the torture machine? 497 00:16:51,369 --> 00:16:53,638 MAN: I think someone forgot to pay the bill, Weggie. 498 00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:56,874 WEGGIE: Will someone pay the fucking bill?! 499 00:16:56,874 --> 00:17:00,879 ♪ The dark brown shades Of my skin ♪ 500 00:17:04,348 --> 00:17:06,751 ♪ All that color To my tears ♪ 501 00:17:04,348 --> 00:17:06,751 [GROANS] 502 00:17:09,020 --> 00:17:11,889 ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 503 00:17:11,889 --> 00:17:14,726 ♪ That splash against My hollow bones ♪ 504 00:17:14,726 --> 00:17:15,961 [GRUMBLES] 505 00:17:17,963 --> 00:17:19,364 ♪ That rocks my soul ♪ 506 00:17:19,364 --> 00:17:21,098 [GRUNTS] 507 00:17:21,098 --> 00:17:23,101 What hath God wrought? 508 00:17:26,737 --> 00:17:28,306 ♪ Looking back over My false dreams ♪ 509 00:17:28,306 --> 00:17:29,540 [CRYING] 510 00:17:29,540 --> 00:17:32,610 [MEN GUFFAWING] 511 00:17:29,540 --> 00:17:32,610 MAN: Yeah, yeah. Beat his ass. 512 00:17:32,610 --> 00:17:35,713 Will you niggas please shut the hell up. 513 00:17:35,713 --> 00:17:38,183 I'm trying to watch this piece-of-shit movie. 514 00:17:39,117 --> 00:17:40,385 [SIGHS] 515 00:17:41,118 --> 00:17:42,353 [GROANS] 516 00:17:42,353 --> 00:17:44,022 [SCREAMS, CRIES] 517 00:17:47,191 --> 00:17:49,761 ♪ Somebody tell me What can I do? ♪ 518 00:17:49,761 --> 00:17:50,762 [GRUNTS] 519 00:17:52,764 --> 00:17:54,332 Ruckus, no! 520 00:17:57,035 --> 00:17:58,536 What the hell are you guys doing? 521 00:17:58,536 --> 00:18:00,105 You were gonna let him kill hisself? 522 00:18:00,105 --> 00:18:01,873 You said just keep filming, so-- 523 00:18:01,873 --> 00:18:03,141 He's the star! 524 00:18:03,141 --> 00:18:05,343 You're gonna let the star commit suicide? 525 00:18:05,343 --> 00:18:06,911 But it's...reality. I mean-- 526 00:18:06,911 --> 00:18:08,813 It's The Uncle Ruckus Show. 527 00:18:08,813 --> 00:18:11,415 If there's no Uncle Ruckus, there's no show. 528 00:18:11,415 --> 00:18:13,885 Oh, so from now on, we're supposed to stop him 529 00:18:13,885 --> 00:18:15,353 if he attempts to commit suicide? 530 00:18:15,353 --> 00:18:17,254 Yes. And I shouldn't have to tell you that. 531 00:18:17,254 --> 00:18:18,823 [CHOKING] 532 00:18:17,254 --> 00:18:18,823 You should just know it. 533 00:18:18,823 --> 00:18:20,458 Oh, shit. 534 00:18:20,458 --> 00:18:21,659 [GAGGING] 535 00:18:21,659 --> 00:18:24,395 Great. That's great. That's just great. 536 00:18:24,395 --> 00:18:26,130 [COUGHING] 537 00:18:26,130 --> 00:18:28,966 Ah, what's the point? What's the point in living? 538 00:18:28,966 --> 00:18:31,169 There's nothing to look forward to. 539 00:18:31,169 --> 00:18:34,005 Just a life of rap music and 40 ounces. 540 00:18:34,005 --> 00:18:35,607 What I'm supposed to do now, huh? 541 00:18:35,607 --> 00:18:37,508 Be somebody baby daddy? 542 00:18:37,508 --> 00:18:39,811 Hang out on the corner all day and night 543 00:18:39,811 --> 00:18:42,781 shooting dice, cops chasing me all the time. 544 00:18:42,781 --> 00:18:45,350 My body ain't made to handle a stun gun. 545 00:18:45,350 --> 00:18:49,087 Ain't got but two or three shows on TV to identify with. 546 00:18:49,087 --> 00:18:51,389 Ruckus, you make a very compelling argument. 547 00:18:51,389 --> 00:18:53,491 But I know that you're gonna get through this. 548 00:18:53,491 --> 00:18:55,059 Ha. Is this what I'm supposed 549 00:18:55,059 --> 00:18:56,561 to be reading now, huh, this? 550 00:18:56,561 --> 00:18:58,830 Vibe? The Source? Jet? 551 00:18:58,830 --> 00:19:00,397 You call this a magazine? 552 00:19:00,397 --> 00:19:02,500 Look at this. This is a pamphlet. 553 00:19:02,500 --> 00:19:04,769 "Field & Scream." National Review. 554 00:19:04,769 --> 00:19:06,170 Soldier of Fortune. 555 00:19:06,170 --> 00:19:07,905 Those are magazines. 556 00:19:07,905 --> 00:19:09,974 This is a brochure. 557 00:19:09,974 --> 00:19:12,577 Ebony. They should call this National Geographic, 558 00:19:12,577 --> 00:19:14,211 except the photos are better. 559 00:19:14,211 --> 00:19:17,382 Essence. Essence of what? Essence of ugliness. 560 00:19:17,382 --> 00:19:19,684 Ruckus, we have a saying at BET: 561 00:19:19,684 --> 00:19:21,919 "We hate black people." 562 00:19:21,919 --> 00:19:24,389 And I know you share that same sentiment. 563 00:19:24,389 --> 00:19:26,858 But I've learned how I can use my blackness 564 00:19:26,858 --> 00:19:28,593 against the black race. 565 00:19:28,593 --> 00:19:30,328 Look at BET. 566 00:19:30,328 --> 00:19:31,929 You think we put this shit on the air 567 00:19:31,929 --> 00:19:33,364 because it's entertaining? 568 00:19:33,364 --> 00:19:34,899 You think we sit down and say: 569 00:19:34,899 --> 00:19:37,034 "Hey, let's be entertaining. 570 00:19:37,034 --> 00:19:39,036 How about a Baldwin Hills reality show?" 571 00:19:39,036 --> 00:19:41,872 I have good taste. Gregory Hines is entertaining. 572 00:19:41,872 --> 00:19:44,542 Sammy Davis Jr., he's entertaining. 573 00:19:44,542 --> 00:19:46,110 You think I can relate to anything 574 00:19:46,110 --> 00:19:47,878 these young niggas have to say? 575 00:19:47,878 --> 00:19:52,016 No. We air this shit because we despise our audience. 576 00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:53,817 Are there other ways to make money? 577 00:19:53,817 --> 00:19:55,253 Yes, of course. Yes, yes, yes. 578 00:19:55,253 --> 00:19:57,788 But they all require more work. 579 00:19:57,788 --> 00:19:58,857 This is easy. 580 00:19:58,857 --> 00:20:00,224 And the only people who suffer-- 581 00:20:00,224 --> 00:20:02,560 The only people who suffer, Ruckus... 582 00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:03,895 are black children. 583 00:20:03,895 --> 00:20:06,564 I think we both can live with that. 584 00:20:06,564 --> 00:20:10,635 Weggie Rudlin, you sure do have profound insights. 585 00:20:10,635 --> 00:20:12,103 But I don't know. I-- 586 00:20:12,103 --> 00:20:15,740 I just don't think I can stand life as a darky. 587 00:20:15,740 --> 00:20:16,740 [DOOR OPENS] 588 00:20:16,740 --> 00:20:18,008 [CLEARS THROAT] 589 00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:20,912 Aha! It's you! You did this to me. 590 00:20:20,912 --> 00:20:22,847 You gave me that test. 591 00:20:22,847 --> 00:20:25,450 Yes, I know. And I came because 592 00:20:25,450 --> 00:20:27,051 there was a mistake at the lab. 593 00:20:27,051 --> 00:20:29,220 We had a black intern there I didn't know about. 594 00:20:29,220 --> 00:20:31,388 He...messed up your test. 595 00:20:31,388 --> 00:20:32,791 Here are your actual results. 596 00:20:33,991 --> 00:20:35,393 Well, I'll be. 597 00:20:35,994 --> 00:20:37,128 [MURMURING] 598 00:20:37,128 --> 00:20:38,796 [GASPS] 599 00:20:38,796 --> 00:20:41,332 Hallelujah! Hallelujah! 600 00:20:41,332 --> 00:20:44,001 How dare you mistakenly inform a man of his blackness. 601 00:20:44,001 --> 00:20:46,804 You should be ashamed to call yourself a white doctor. 602 00:20:46,804 --> 00:20:49,074 I'm...uh, sorry. 603 00:20:49,074 --> 00:20:51,976 See, Ruckus. You were worried about nothing. 604 00:20:51,976 --> 00:20:53,478 Well, Weggie, I must say, 605 00:20:53,478 --> 00:20:54,945 for a darky, you are not 606 00:20:54,945 --> 00:20:56,814 that difficult to hang around. 607 00:20:56,814 --> 00:20:59,049 Now, you said you learned all that stuff in Harvard? 608 00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:01,152 Well, I definitely didn't learn it at one of those 609 00:21:01,152 --> 00:21:02,653 historically black colleges. 610 00:21:02,653 --> 00:21:03,822 [LAUGHS] 611 00:21:03,822 --> 00:21:05,022 [BOTH CACKLING] 612 00:21:05,022 --> 00:21:07,859 Howard. 613 00:21:05,022 --> 00:21:07,859 Black college. 614 00:21:07,859 --> 00:21:10,161 Morehouse. They ought to call it Lesshouse. 615 00:21:10,161 --> 00:21:13,564 Oh, it sure feel good to be white again. 616 00:21:13,564 --> 00:21:16,367 [♪♪♪] 617 00:21:16,367 --> 00:21:17,668 I'll tell you what. 618 00:21:17,668 --> 00:21:19,970 Living even for a few days as a black man 619 00:21:19,970 --> 00:21:23,808 gave old Uncle Ruckus a whole new perspective on life. 620 00:21:23,808 --> 00:21:26,544 And a whole lot more sympathy towards colored folks, 621 00:21:26,544 --> 00:21:28,512 I'll tell you that. 622 00:21:28,512 --> 00:21:30,614 Oh, look what we have here. 623 00:21:30,614 --> 00:21:33,117 Yo, for real. We not trying to play with you today, Ruckus. 624 00:21:33,117 --> 00:21:34,651 We're trying to cross the street. 625 00:21:34,651 --> 00:21:36,354 Well, go right ahead. 626 00:21:36,354 --> 00:21:38,623 You young brothers have a blessed day. 627 00:21:38,623 --> 00:21:40,091 Assalamu alaikam. 628 00:21:44,428 --> 00:21:46,864 [WHISTLES] 629 00:21:46,864 --> 00:21:48,867 [TRUCK HORN HONKS] 630 00:21:46,864 --> 00:21:48,867 Whoa--! Whoa--! Whoa! 631 00:21:49,767 --> 00:21:52,137 [RUCKUS CACKLING] 632 00:21:56,974 --> 00:21:59,878 [♪♪♪]