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00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:31,240
BALLADEER:
Welcome to Hazzard County.
2
00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:35,080
A little corner of the world where
everyone knows everyone else...
3
00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:38,600
...and people are never too busy
to stop and say howdy.
4
00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:42,960
Shoot, some folks even say this is
where the apple pie was invented.
5
00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:49,240
Yep, basically everything down here
moves a little bit slower...
6
00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:55,080
...unless, of course,
your last name is Duke.
7
00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:58,000
[CHEERING]
8
00:01:14,480 --> 00:01:16,360
Man, the General's in good shape.
9
00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:20,160
Bo, it's happy hour at The Boar's Nest,
and we still got two deliveries to make.
10
00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:26,240
It's all one big happy hour, Luke.
Besides, we're taking a shortcut.
11
00:01:30,840 --> 00:01:32,000
[WHOOPING]
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00:01:45,320 --> 00:01:47,120
LAURIE:
Hi, Luke.
13
00:01:48,560 --> 00:01:51,520
- I got this one.
- You sure that's a good idea, cuz?
14
00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:53,640
It's a great idea. Come on.
15
00:01:54,520 --> 00:01:56,160
[LUKE SPEAKS SPANISH]
16
00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:58,760
Hey, Laurie.
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00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:02,040
- You here to make your delivery?
- Well, I was hoping to.
18
00:02:02,240 --> 00:02:04,560
Luke, remember last time.
19
00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:06,400
Don't worry about it, cuz.
20
00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:08,840
It's okay, Bo. Pa ain't here.
21
00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:12,200
See, Bo? Pa ain't here.
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00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:16,480
LAURIE: Hi.
LUKE: Hi.
23
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,280
Play hard to get, little buddy.
24
00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:33,920
Listen and learn, General.
25
00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:38,080
MAN [ON STEREO]: And now,
side two of the AI Unser, Jr. story:
26
00:02:38,280 --> 00:02:43,240
No Questions, Only Unsers,
as read by Laurence Fishburne.
27
00:02:43,440 --> 00:02:45,520
FISHBURNE [ON STEREO]:
"I'm too old for this shit."
28
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:48,520
That's what I was thinking
as I turned into the final lap...
29
00:02:48,720 --> 00:02:51,280
...running fourth at Talladega.
30
00:02:51,440 --> 00:02:54,880
But then it hit me.
Life is like a racetrack.
31
00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:57,720
You gotta keep going
round and round.
32
00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:01,800
- That is so true.
- Sure, sometimes you crash and burn.
33
00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:05,400
But if you don't make the turn,
you ain't never gonna learn.
34
00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:10,640
So I gripped the wheel tighter,
checked my gauges and made my move.
35
00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:13,040
Make my move. Give you my move.
Make it, mother...
36
00:03:13,240 --> 00:03:14,240
[POUNDING ON WINDOW]
37
00:03:14,440 --> 00:03:16,520
- Jesus Christ!
- Howdy, Bo.
38
00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:20,600
Hey, Mr. Pullman.
I nearly shit myself.
39
00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:22,920
- How you doing, sir?
- Oh, I'm fine.
40
00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:25,920
You ready for that big
Hazzard Rally this weekend?
41
00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:29,120
Yeah, I got him all tuned up.
Right, General?
42
00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:31,480
How many times
you won that, anyway?
43
00:03:31,640 --> 00:03:34,320
- Four in a row, sir.
- Four in a row.
44
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:38,800
That's good. Billy Prickett won it four in
a row, and look what he's doing today.
45
00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:41,880
- Hey, you been hunting?
PULLMAN: Yes, sir.
46
00:03:42,040 --> 00:03:44,600
Yeah, I been using
those new whammy shells.
47
00:03:44,760 --> 00:03:48,080
They scatter less for when you really
wanna blow a hole in something.
48
00:03:50,960 --> 00:03:53,680
- Cool. Guns.
- Yeah.
49
00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:57,720
Are you delivering
all by yourself today?
50
00:03:57,920 --> 00:03:59,880
BO:
Oh, no. I never travel alone, sir.
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00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:02,440
I like to think I travel
with the man upstairs.
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00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:05,160
You know, Jesus.
53
00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:09,320
You know, I like that attitude.
54
00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:11,840
I'm gonna look around
and find a boy like you...
55
00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:14,520
...to date my daughter,
Laurie, pretty soon.
56
00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:17,680
Because she's getting curious
about boys, you know.
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00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:19,200
BO:
Yeah.
58
00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:22,040
Oh, you're talking about sex, right?
59
00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:25,960
I just wanna keep that
sorry cousin of yours away from her.
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00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,480
The way he looks at her galls me.
You know what I mean?
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00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:29,800
[GUNSHOT]
62
00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:31,080
[INDISTINCT SHOUTING]
63
00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:33,720
JIMMY: You get back here
right now, you son of a bitch.
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00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:35,600
Get back here.
65
00:04:35,760 --> 00:04:38,160
Luke! Luke!
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00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:39,920
JIMMY: Why
you running, you chickenshit?
67
00:04:40,120 --> 00:04:41,480
Goddamn Dukes.
68
00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:43,280
You get the hell off my sister.
Ahh!
69
00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:45,240
LAURIE: Jimmy!
- Oh, shit.
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00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:48,360
PULLMAN: Damn you, Luke!
You get back in the house!
71
00:04:48,520 --> 00:04:50,920
- Go, Bo, go!
- Luke, wait!
72
00:04:51,080 --> 00:04:53,680
PULLMAN: Put on a shirt!
- Come on, come on, come on.
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00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:55,800
I forgot about the brother. Go!
74
00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:01,840
So happy hour?
75
00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:04,840
- You're gonna get us shot someday.
- Not today.
76
00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,480
Not with you driving the getaway car.
77
00:05:09,920 --> 00:05:12,360
- So how was it?
- It's never bad.
78
00:05:12,560 --> 00:05:13,640
JIMMY:
Yee-haw!
79
00:05:13,800 --> 00:05:15,040
[GUNSHOT]
80
00:05:15,640 --> 00:05:17,320
Son of a bitch.
81
00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,760
Here, load up with these
whammy shells.
82
00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:23,200
They'll blow a hole through
an elephant's ass.
83
00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:25,560
JIMMY:
Look out.
84
00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:29,840
[GUNSHOT]
85
00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:32,320
Oh, goddamn it!
You're gonna replace that.
86
00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:36,400
- What's he using?
- You don't wanna know.
87
00:05:36,560 --> 00:05:39,160
Dadgum it,
you just assassinated a tree.
88
00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:40,880
Got a big kick to it.
89
00:05:41,080 --> 00:05:43,960
Don't you worry. They can't touch
the General. Come on, boy.
90
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:53,200
You missed, Jimmy!
91
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:57,600
Can't you shoot straight? Don't point
that thing at me, you chucklehead.
92
00:05:57,760 --> 00:06:00,400
JIMMY: Don't call me a chucklehead.
I ain't a chucklehead.
93
00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:02,840
PULLMAN:
Hey! Get that gun out of the wheel!
94
00:06:03,040 --> 00:06:04,080
[GUN COCKS]
95
00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:06,680
What are you doing? Hey.
Hey. What the hell?
96
00:06:07,080 --> 00:06:08,720
- Goddamn it.
JIMMY: I'm sorry, Daddy.
97
00:06:08,920 --> 00:06:10,760
Let's go after them.
98
00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:15,920
- Bo, did you see that sign?
- I can read!
99
00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:18,200
This is how you planned
on losing them?
100
00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:19,880
You ain't scared, are you?
101
00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:23,080
Scared? Hell, no. I just don't
wanna hear it from Uncle Jesse...
102
00:06:23,240 --> 00:06:25,520
...when you break his bottles of shine.
103
00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:28,280
I bet you the old phone book
I don't break a bottle.
104
00:06:28,480 --> 00:06:30,280
Phone book it is.
105
00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:34,120
Daddy, you get me close,
and I'll put a bullet in this son of a bitch.
106
00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:36,280
[GRUNTS]
107
00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:39,120
Goddamn it, Jimmy!
108
00:06:39,280 --> 00:06:42,880
Who says I can't shoot? Daddy? Daddy!
109
00:06:49,280 --> 00:06:50,920
[CHEERING]
110
00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:55,800
BOTH:
Yee-haw!
111
00:07:03,280 --> 00:07:06,160
BALLADEER:
Bo and Luke Duke.
112
00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:08,320
Cousins closer than brothers.
113
00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:11,160
Both big-hearted, strong-willed...
114
00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:14,720
...and restless as a couple of cats
thrown into a swimming hole.
115
00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:20,920
[LAUGHING]
116
00:07:21,120 --> 00:07:22,640
[HORN HONKING]
117
00:07:41,880 --> 00:07:43,280
Nice driving, cuz.
118
00:07:47,320 --> 00:07:48,800
What?
119
00:07:52,360 --> 00:07:55,840
- I won the bet, you son of a bitch.
- Oh, come on.
120
00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:58,960
I didn't break any bottles,
so I won the bet.
121
00:08:01,800 --> 00:08:02,960
[GROANS]
122
00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:06,320
LUKE: I was just joking about the bet.
BO: Oh, you were joking?
123
00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:08,560
LUKE: Yeah.
- Still getting the phone book, though.
124
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:12,600
LUKE: Come on, double or nothing.
- Nope. Time to pay your debt, buddy.
125
00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:15,840
Which side you want,
right side or left?
126
00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:19,560
Right.
127
00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:21,480
Did I hear one of your teeth break?
128
00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:24,680
I don't remember the Hazzard
phone book being that thick.
129
00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:27,160
This is Atlanta.
130
00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:36,400
[LUKE LAUGHING]
131
00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:41,360
BO: Bet was over. I can't believe that
happened. I mean, the bet was over.
132
00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:43,400
- What are you doing?
- Where you want it?
133
00:08:44,840 --> 00:08:47,040
- Oh, man.
- Where you want it?
134
00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:48,760
Left.
135
00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:52,640
That was a good one.
136
00:08:54,680 --> 00:08:55,880
[GRUNTS]
137
00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:59,800
Right in the ball sack. God.
138
00:09:00,920 --> 00:09:03,480
In case of dehydration.
139
00:09:09,320 --> 00:09:11,480
That'll put lead in your pencil.
140
00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:19,160
BO: Man, I'm already tired of walking.
- You could use a little exercise.
141
00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:21,480
Them jeans of yours
look tighter than Daisy's.
142
00:09:21,680 --> 00:09:25,080
BO: Oh, yeah? I bet you a cold beer
I could beat you to The Boar's Nest.
143
00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:27,160
LUKE:
That's five miles.
144
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:38,960
LUKE:
I'm coming! I'm coming!
145
00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:45,360
Face!
146
00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:46,640
[LAUGHS]
147
00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:53,800
He came back.
148
00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:58,040
What's Billy Prickett doing here?
149
00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:00,280
Well, it looks like he's here
for the race.
150
00:10:02,720 --> 00:10:06,400
Man, those tires alone are worth
more than the General Lee.
151
00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:11,120
My, oh, my. Look at that.
Billy Prickett's car, huh?
152
00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:13,720
What's new
in law enforcement, Enos?
153
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:17,560
- They make you lieutenant yet?
- Hell, you know that'll never happen.
154
00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:20,600
Maybe one of these days you'll
wise up and come work for us.
155
00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:22,560
We could use a man like you.
156
00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:26,400
I don't know. I don't think it's a good
time to be in the moonshine business.
157
00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:29,600
Moonshine business?
We ain't in the moonshining business.
158
00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:36,080
But if someone were in the moonshining
business, why would it be a bad time?
159
00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:39,480
Now, Luke, you know I can't say
anything. Boss Hogg'll tan my hide.
160
00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:41,120
He spanks you?
161
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:43,800
Hey, Dil, what do you want?
We just ordered.
162
00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:46,920
By the looks of this place,
I'll take two bottles of Pepto...
163
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,560
...and a shot of penicillin, right?
164
00:10:48,760 --> 00:10:49,960
[LAUGHING]
165
00:10:50,120 --> 00:10:52,800
[COINS JINGLING]
166
00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:01,360
Jesus, mother of Mary.
167
00:11:04,440 --> 00:11:06,920
Look away, man.
Trust me, look away.
168
00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:09,520
Don't worry about it.
I won't hurt her.
169
00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:13,360
There ain't nobody in this bar
concerned about you hurting her.
170
00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:15,280
DIL:
All right, all right.
171
00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:22,160
Y'all ready to order?
172
00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:27,200
You better be reading
my nametag, friend.
173
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:31,800
I am, I am. I noticed
your initials were double D.
174
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:33,560
[LAUGHING]
175
00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:36,560
- Oh, sweet Jesus.
- I'll give you one more chance.
176
00:11:36,760 --> 00:11:39,840
You wanna order, or you wanna sit
around and make stupid jokes?
177
00:11:40,040 --> 00:11:42,320
Ain't gotta get fussy.
We're having a good time.
178
00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:45,360
I'll tell you what, I'll order.
We don't want no problems.
179
00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:47,760
Let's see...
180
00:11:48,760 --> 00:11:50,560
Do those legs come over easy?
181
00:11:50,880 --> 00:11:52,800
Oh, my God.
182
00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:58,960
- How about the special, sir?
BILLY: Dil Driscoll!
183
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:02,920
You stop bothering that nice girl
and pick on somebody your own size.
184
00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:05,320
MAN 1: Billy Prickett.
MAN 2: Hey, it's Billy Prickett!
185
00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:08,280
MAN 3: Welcome home, boy.
- You old mule.
186
00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:11,200
MAN 4:
Hey.
187
00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:15,200
Why don't you cool off, Dil?
188
00:12:16,720 --> 00:12:18,480
MAN 3: Come on, boy.
Let's get out of here.
189
00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:20,000
My, my, my.
190
00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:24,760
Holy hell, Luke. There he is, right there.
That's Billy Prickett.
191
00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:26,480
Should I buy him a drink?
192
00:12:26,640 --> 00:12:29,280
Maybe you should buy him
flowers and chocolates.
193
00:12:29,440 --> 00:12:33,560
Give me a Miller.
Make it a Löwenbräu.
194
00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:36,760
How you doing?
195
00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:40,080
Hey, Billy Prickett.
Welcome back to Hazzard.
196
00:12:40,480 --> 00:12:41,800
Oh.
197
00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:45,040
See, boys, I told you all the
waitresses in this place was dog ugly.
198
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:46,800
[LAUGHING]
199
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:49,760
- Man.
- I'm only fooling with you.
200
00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:51,480
Fellas, this is Bo Duke.
201
00:12:51,680 --> 00:12:55,680
Bo is looking to break my Hazzard Rally
record. What is it now, four in a row?
202
00:12:56,040 --> 00:12:57,800
Yeah, well...
203
00:12:57,960 --> 00:13:04,040
All streaks must come to an end, Bo.
I'm calling this one "the drive for five."
204
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:08,000
- Well, I'm looking forward to the race.
- Hey, Dil!
205
00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:10,400
This is the boy
who's trying to break my record.
206
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:13,840
Oh, really? I'm Dil Driscoll, crew chief.
207
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:15,440
- Bo-Bo, have a seat.
BO: Really?
208
00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:20,520
So, Billy, what's it like
being in the circuit?
209
00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:22,720
- Well...
WOMAN: Hey, Billy, join me for a drink?
210
00:13:22,920 --> 00:13:24,480
Oh, well, you sweet little thing.
211
00:13:24,680 --> 00:13:27,840
Fellas, I'm awfully thirsty
all of a sudden.
212
00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:30,440
Bo-Bo, may the best man win.
213
00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,320
DAISY:
John, another round!
214
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:37,400
So, Bo, what's the story
on that little pistol over there?
215
00:13:37,640 --> 00:13:40,760
Because she gave me a ride earlier.
216
00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:43,800
Well, actually, she's my cousin.
217
00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:46,600
Oh, really? You hitting that?
218
00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:50,960
- She's my cousin.
- Hopefully you're kissing cousins, right?
219
00:13:52,920 --> 00:13:55,880
- Come again?
- Son, all I'm really trying to ask you...
220
00:13:56,040 --> 00:13:59,200
...is if you shuck her corn.
221
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:04,520
BALLADEER:
Now, there are certain things....
222
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:09,040
...you just don't say to
a Duke about another Duke.
223
00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:15,200
I'll shuck your corn!
224
00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:19,160
Excuse me a second.
225
00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:21,040
DIL:
Pick him up! Pick him up!
226
00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:25,120
Hey, hey. Can I get in on this?
227
00:14:25,280 --> 00:14:26,520
MAN 1: Yeah.
MAN 2: Sure.
228
00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:35,920
Oh, buddy.
229
00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:39,840
MAN:
Here we go.
230
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:44,400
MAN:
Fifty bucks on the Dukes!
231
00:14:58,320 --> 00:15:00,840
BO: That makes two, Luke!
DAISY: Attaboy!
232
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:07,920
[CHEERING]
233
00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:11,160
Hey, Billy Prickett!
234
00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:13,320
Careful, Bo-Bo.
235
00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:18,360
Don't hit him. That's A.J. Foyt!
236
00:15:18,640 --> 00:15:20,600
- Really?
- The fourth!
237
00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:28,320
[SCREAMING]
238
00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:50,160
- Hey, can I hit this guy?
- Kill them all!
239
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:55,400
- The ribs are greasy.
- The beans are cold.
240
00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,080
[GUNSHOT]
241
00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:01,440
[BO CHEERS]
242
00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:03,080
[THUD]
243
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:06,480
BALLADEER:
Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane.
244
00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:10,320
Closest thing to law enforcement
in Hazzard County.
245
00:16:10,520 --> 00:16:14,480
Rosco's been after the Duke boys
since they started walking.
246
00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:17,280
Of course, some people say
the boys' first steps...
247
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:21,880
...landed right on the sheriff's
last nerve.
248
00:16:36,080 --> 00:16:39,240
Dukes. Just once you two
ought to try leaving a place...
249
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:42,200
...in better shape
than it was when you walked in.
250
00:16:42,360 --> 00:16:47,200
Oh, I think your boss can afford
to replace a few broken beer mugs.
251
00:16:47,360 --> 00:16:50,320
I heard there was
a little incident earlier...
252
00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:55,720
...concerning a certain crappy
orange hot rod out at the Miller farm.
253
00:16:56,120 --> 00:16:58,760
Y'all really upset some
of them construction boys.
254
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:02,880
When I got there, they were not being
gentle with your beloved piece of crap.
255
00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:06,320
What'd you do, Rosco?
256
00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:10,480
I can't say she's gonna be in real good
racing shape for the rally this weekend.
257
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:18,080
You watch yourself, hillbilly boy.
258
00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:22,520
Come on, boys. My shift's over.
I'll take you over to Cooter's.
259
00:17:22,680 --> 00:17:23,760
Come on.
260
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,680
[LAUGHING]
261
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:50,440
BALLADEER:
Jefferson Davis Hogg....
262
00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:53,880
...the meanest man
in Hazzard County.
263
00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:58,680
He's canny as a fox,
tough as a badger...
264
00:17:59,080 --> 00:18:03,320
...and crooked as a hillbilly's smile.
265
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:07,080
Well, Rosco.
266
00:18:09,640 --> 00:18:13,600
I see you have redecorated.
267
00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:16,800
Interesting style. What do you call it?
268
00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:20,600
- Well, sir, the Dukes...
- The Dukes.
269
00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:22,880
I had a feeling.
270
00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:32,320
I've got some important things
happening here this weekend.
271
00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:36,160
- Yes, sir.
- Are you gonna take care of the Dukes...
272
00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:39,800
...or am I gonna have to make
other plans?
273
00:18:39,960 --> 00:18:42,760
I'm on top of it, Boss.
274
00:18:42,920 --> 00:18:45,440
That's what I'm afraid of.
275
00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:50,080
COOTER: You ready?
- Is it bad?
276
00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:52,040
Not good.
277
00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:58,880
Hell, this is worse than the time
you sunk it in the Tipton Swamp.
278
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:04,360
Mostly cosmetic damage,
right, Cooter?
279
00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:07,520
- Mostly.
- Yeah.
280
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:12,320
- He's gonna be ready for the race, right?
- Race? Come on, Bo.
281
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,960
I mean, the General doesn't race.
282
00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:17,680
The General erases the competition.
283
00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:19,000
[WHISTLES]
284
00:19:22,360 --> 00:19:23,960
[WHIMPERS]
285
00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:38,320
Who does this?
286
00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:45,360
It would make a nice hat or a slipper.
287
00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:49,080
You know what? Just leave the General
here with me. I'll see if I can fix...
288
00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:52,800
I'll have it up running in no time.
Meanwhile, you boys take my truck.
289
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:55,880
What if you need to tow somebody?
290
00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:59,680
If I can't "toe" them, I'll finger them.
You know what I'm saying?
291
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:10,520
Close one. Even shell-shocked,
he's a better driver than you are.
292
00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:12,680
DAISY: Thanks, Cooter.
- Yeah.
293
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:14,840
[RATTLING]
294
00:20:17,240 --> 00:20:18,800
Chin up.
295
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:21,680
Oh!
296
00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:23,120
[FLIES BUZZING]
297
00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:26,520
JESSE:
Daisy?
298
00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:28,800
BALLADEER:
Jesse L. Duke.
299
00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:31,760
- Uncle Jesse to you.
- Daisy.
300
00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:34,920
BALLADEER: Now, Jesse's
been two places in his life:
301
00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:37,360
Hazzard County and Korea.
302
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:39,920
- Daisy?
DAISY: I'm in here.
303
00:20:40,120 --> 00:20:42,280
BALLADEER: As far as he's concerned...
- Where are you?
304
00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:43,760
DAISY:
I'm in the shower.
305
00:20:43,960 --> 00:20:45,480
BALLADEER:
...that's one place too many.
306
00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:47,360
Ready or not, here I come.
307
00:20:55,480 --> 00:20:58,640
- How's it looking, good-looking?
- Well, I fixed the vapor coils...
308
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:02,280
...but the boiler's still slow.
You been running this around the clock?
309
00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:06,080
Them boys break more bottles than
they deliver. Eight cases this month.
310
00:21:06,360 --> 00:21:09,280
Wonder where in the hell
they are, anyway.
311
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:13,280
LUKE:
It'll make you feel lots better.
312
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:19,120
- Light the son of a bitch.
- All right.
313
00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:23,920
[LUKE LAUGHING]
314
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,160
I feel good.
315
00:21:26,360 --> 00:21:29,080
All right, y'all, knock off
the grab-assing over there.
316
00:21:29,360 --> 00:21:31,320
What's going on, Uncle Jesse?
317
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:34,680
Guy come out of an antique shop
carrying a big grandfather's clock.
318
00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:36,840
Bumped into this drunk,
broke the clock.
319
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:39,160
Guy said, "Why don't you watch
where you're going."
320
00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:42,200
The drunk says, "Why don't you carry
a wristwatch like everybody else."
321
00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:43,920
[LAUGHING]
322
00:21:44,120 --> 00:21:46,440
Know what happens
when you give a politician Viagra?
323
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:48,440
- No.
- He gets taller.
324
00:21:49,680 --> 00:21:51,440
Here's another one for you.
325
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,680
How many Dukes does it take
to screw up a moonshine delivery?
326
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:57,000
Oh, yes, sorry about that,
Uncle Jesse. We...
327
00:21:57,200 --> 00:21:58,280
[EXPLOSION]
328
00:21:58,440 --> 00:21:59,520
Whoa!
329
00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:01,240
[SHOUTING GIBBERISH]
330
00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:05,680
LUKE:
Is that Rosco?
331
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,760
Wonder what
that fat sack of shit wants.
332
00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:10,960
Come on.
333
00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:14,360
ROSCO: We can skip
the "Hi, how are you's."
334
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:16,760
I'm here on official police business.
335
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:19,080
DEPUTY:
Right here, sheriff.
336
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:23,840
Oh, that's horseshit.
You planted that.
337
00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:32,800
"By the power vested in me
by the County of Hazzard, Georgia...
338
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:35,040
...I hereby seize this property...
339
00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:38,800
...for the crime of producing
and distributing moonshine."
340
00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:43,040
Now, Jesse,
we can do this the easy way...
341
00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:45,360
...or, of course...
342
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:49,200
...there's that other way.
343
00:22:49,360 --> 00:22:52,320
- Let's try the that other way first.
DAISY: Now, hold on. Wait.
344
00:22:52,520 --> 00:22:54,960
Only way I'm leaving this farm
is in a wooden box.
345
00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:57,040
BOSS:
Well...
346
00:22:58,040 --> 00:23:00,360
Hi, Dukes.
347
00:23:02,240 --> 00:23:03,720
Hi.
348
00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:06,240
Well, now.
349
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:08,760
Lookie there.
350
00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:14,080
Moonshining.
What a shame, what a shame.
351
00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:17,440
- That ain't ours, Boss.
- Really?
352
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:19,920
You're out of here.
353
00:23:20,080 --> 00:23:22,320
This land ain't yours anymore.
354
00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:24,560
You're gonna have to
live somewhere else...
355
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:27,400
...and you're never gonna moonshine...
JESSE: Why, you prick!
356
00:23:27,560 --> 00:23:32,680
Watch out. I got my dog here,
and I ain't fed him, and he's real hungry.
357
00:23:33,360 --> 00:23:36,280
Easy, Jesse. Not now.
358
00:23:39,680 --> 00:23:42,800
You boys done started a fight
you can't win.
359
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:53,480
Well, you have my sympathy.
Y'all take care, now.
360
00:23:58,880 --> 00:24:01,680
- Should've busted a cap in his ass.
- Hell, yeah.
361
00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:03,960
Hey, easy now, boys.
362
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:07,160
Thanks for taking us in, Pauline.
We really appreciate it.
363
00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:09,160
Oh, honey, it is my pleasure.
364
00:24:09,320 --> 00:24:13,320
I left three toes in Korea for this country,
and this is the thanks I get.
365
00:24:13,480 --> 00:24:16,000
I don't understand how they
could just take your farm.
366
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,080
They planted a still in our barn.
367
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:23,000
They planted a still? Now,
why would they need to plant a still?
368
00:24:23,160 --> 00:24:26,200
Because they're too damn dumb
to find our real one.
369
00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:30,120
I was waiting on old Bill Miller
up at the truck stop last night.
370
00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:34,600
He said Boss' men seized his land
for some trumped-up charge too.
371
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:38,960
Maybe it's got to do with all that
construction equipment at the Millers'.
372
00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:41,560
You wanna go up there
and take a second look?
373
00:24:41,760 --> 00:24:43,680
Oh, I don't know, boys.
374
00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:45,360
Oh, now, Pauline.
375
00:24:47,600 --> 00:24:50,600
Don't worry, Uncle Jesse.
We're gonna take care of it.
376
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:53,360
You know what's gonna happen,
don't you?
377
00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:56,560
Those two are gonna get themselves
in trouble, end up in jail...
378
00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:59,240
...and I'm gonna have to
shake my ass to get them out.
379
00:24:59,440 --> 00:25:01,560
JESSE:
That's why we love you, honey.
380
00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:09,280
COOTER: Oh, goddamn it.
ROSCO: Well, well, well.
381
00:25:10,640 --> 00:25:12,760
What the hell
do you think you're doing?
382
00:25:12,960 --> 00:25:15,560
What's it look like?
I'm building a doomsday machine...
383
00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:18,160
...gonna aim it right up
your heinie hole.
384
00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:20,600
You stupid enough to think
you can fix this?
385
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:23,200
- I'm fixing to fix it.
- Oh, you fixing to fix it.
386
00:25:23,360 --> 00:25:26,280
You couldn't fix an election
if your brother was the governor.
387
00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:28,600
What do you want, Rosco?
388
00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:33,880
This here vehicle, it was used in the
illegal transportation of moonshine.
389
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:35,640
Boss wants it impounded.
390
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,640
It ain't running right now,
and my tow truck ain't here...
391
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:40,720
...so unless you stick it up your ass...
392
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:43,440
Hey, one way or another,
grease monkey...
393
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:46,600
...tomorrow I'm auctioning off
this hunk of junk.
394
00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:49,200
So y'all have a good night, now, okay?
395
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:56,600
I got two words for you:
soap and water.
396
00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:00,120
That's three words.
397
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,080
Stupid.
398
00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:11,000
Hey, man, this is Cooter.
399
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:14,680
Round up the fellas.
I got a job for them.
400
00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:20,760
Lot of equipment there
for an abandoned farm.
401
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:24,440
LUKE: Yeah, and that fence
went up pretty quick too, huh?
402
00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:27,840
- Let's go ditch the truck.
- All right.
403
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:36,240
[GRUNTING]
404
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:42,360
[FABRIC RIPPING]
405
00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:47,640
[THUD]
406
00:26:53,120 --> 00:26:56,040
LUKE: Well, ain't that cute,
a man taking his pig for a walk.
407
00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:02,480
Come on.
408
00:27:11,120 --> 00:27:12,880
What now?
409
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,320
Lookie here, Bo.
410
00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:26,560
He's got our farm marked, right next
to the Millers' and the Robinsons'.
411
00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:31,080
What the hell does he want
with all this land?
412
00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:33,360
I don't know.
413
00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:38,560
But I tell you what,
if I was incriminating information...
414
00:27:38,720 --> 00:27:41,880
...I'd be hiding in that big,
huge son of a bitch.
415
00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:45,440
- How are we supposed to open that?
BALLADEER: I don't know about you....
416
00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:48,360
...but I'd sure hate to be
that safe right now.
417
00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:50,240
BO AND LUKE:
Yeah!
418
00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:58,120
[CHEERING]
419
00:28:04,120 --> 00:28:07,120
Holy shit.
420
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:19,720
Hope they got e-mail.
421
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:34,480
Oh, dear.
422
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:47,080
BO:
What the hell?
423
00:28:51,000 --> 00:28:52,440
LUKE:
It's stuck on a pole.
424
00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:55,360
I'll check it.
425
00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:00,880
[AIR SUPPLY'S "ALL OUT
OF LOVE" PLAYS ON RADIO]
426
00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:11,160
- Give it some gas!
- Okay!
427
00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:13,120
[ENGINE REVVING]
428
00:29:17,440 --> 00:29:21,640
LUKE: Hey, give it a little more gas!
- Okay!
429
00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:25,040
- Hey, Bo, hold up!
- Okay!
430
00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:27,160
Hey! No, Bo! No!
431
00:29:27,320 --> 00:29:29,160
Okay!
432
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:31,120
[LUKE SCREAMING]
433
00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:33,960
- Yeah!
- Bo!
434
00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:38,520
- No, Bo!
- Sorry, cuz.
435
00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:40,520
You'd do the same thing to me.
436
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:42,520
Bo!
437
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:44,480
[SCREAMING]
438
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:50,440
Bo, damn it!
439
00:29:51,720 --> 00:29:53,640
Hold on, little buddy!
440
00:29:57,840 --> 00:29:59,200
Oh, shit!
441
00:29:59,360 --> 00:30:01,000
[HORN HONKING]
442
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:08,480
Bo, you son of a...
443
00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:14,240
[GROANING]
444
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:32,440
I said, no, Bo. No!
445
00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:34,480
Oh.
446
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:38,280
I thought you said, "Go, Bo. Go."
447
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:40,400
You see how that sounds kind of...?
448
00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:47,440
Hey, you know what?
Sheev lives near here.
449
00:30:47,600 --> 00:30:49,720
Maybe he can help us
open this thing up, huh?
450
00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:52,400
Yeah.
451
00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:56,520
Okay. We'll go to Sheev's.
452
00:31:05,480 --> 00:31:08,760
Rosco, this here's Chip.
453
00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:11,200
You might wanna call Hogg...
454
00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:16,120
...and tell him them two fellers,
they made off with his safe.
455
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:19,440
And I might need a ride too.
456
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:27,400
Boss, what kind of mood you in?
457
00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:30,800
I'm in a crawfish-boiling mood.
458
00:31:31,840 --> 00:31:36,280
Well, it seems that the Duke boys...
459
00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:38,920
...have stolen your safe.
460
00:31:43,920 --> 00:31:47,240
I am officially upgrading the Dukes...
461
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:52,160
...from "fly in my ointment"
to "thorn in my side."
462
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:56,960
And if they happen to elevate
themselves to "pain in my ass"...
463
00:31:57,120 --> 00:32:02,160
...then I'm gonna boil you. Got it?
464
00:32:02,320 --> 00:32:04,640
- Yes, sir.
- Now...
465
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:08,800
...I want you to find the Dukes
and lock them up.
466
00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:13,440
Oh, and bring me my damn safe back.
467
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:15,360
Yes, sir.
468
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:21,560
Flash.
469
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:26,200
[SIREN WAILS]
470
00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:32,560
[INDISTINCT CHATTER ON TV]
471
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:35,560
ROSCO:
Evening, Sheev.
472
00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:39,720
Sheev.
473
00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:52,320
I'm looking for them Duke boys.
You seen them?
474
00:32:54,640 --> 00:32:57,720
They was last seen
heading up this road here.
475
00:32:59,600 --> 00:33:03,120
You still got them CIA mind probes
stuck in your head, boy?
476
00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:05,880
Far as I know.
477
00:33:06,040 --> 00:33:09,040
Good.
Keep your little antennae up there...
478
00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:12,800
...in case you see the Dukes,
you let me know, you hear?
479
00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:14,600
Yeah.
480
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:19,880
Stinks out here, you know that?
481
00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:30,320
[WHISTLES]
482
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:34,120
- Is he gone, Sheev?
- He's gone.
483
00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:45,640
- Prickett, Prickett.
BILLY [ON TV]: It means a lot to me....
484
00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:47,960
...to be invited here
back to my hometown.
485
00:33:48,160 --> 00:33:50,280
I hope to remind
the good people of Hazzard...
486
00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:54,240
-. ... what it feels like to be proud again.
PEOPLE [ON TV]: We love you, Billy!
487
00:33:54,600 --> 00:33:58,520
And I hope to remind the good people
of Hazzard to come out to the rally...
488
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:01,200
...and cheer their favorite son,
Billy Prickett!
489
00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:03,040
[PEOPLE CHEERING ON TV]
490
00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:06,200
And I'm declaring today
Billy Prickett Day.
491
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:10,320
You're too kind.
I just hope, come Saturday...
492
00:34:10,480 --> 00:34:13,040
...I'm not too hazardous on the roads.
493
00:34:13,240 --> 00:34:14,320
[LAUGHS]
494
00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:16,320
"Hazardous on the roads."
495
00:34:16,680 --> 00:34:19,240
- This one's for you!
- This is Tammy Arinder...
496
00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:21,880
...at the parade, for WCNU News.
497
00:34:22,080 --> 00:34:24,240
Seeing Billy Prickett race in person?
498
00:34:24,400 --> 00:34:27,120
That might be worth
putting my pants on for.
499
00:34:27,280 --> 00:34:30,280
- Bo, you racing on Saturday?
- I'm planning on it.
500
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:32,680
What's the prize for second place?
501
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:36,160
Gonna be good.
Tough one, good luck.
502
00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:39,000
It's a little weird
he's coming back here to race.
503
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:43,280
Life's weird, Luke. Someday
you're gonna have to accept that.
504
00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:49,600
Well, okay.
Let's take a look at that lockbox.
505
00:34:51,240 --> 00:34:53,720
Oh, yeah. Liberty 400.
506
00:34:54,240 --> 00:34:57,200
High-density,
9200-psi composite material.
507
00:34:57,360 --> 00:34:59,680
Two-inch chrome bolts,
vertical and horizontal.
508
00:34:59,880 --> 00:35:03,680
And a spring-loaded, independent
relocking device, with a foreign body.
509
00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:07,200
- She's a beauty.
- Can you crack it?
510
00:35:07,360 --> 00:35:09,360
I'm gonna do more than crack it.
511
00:35:09,520 --> 00:35:10,680
[ANIMAL SQUEALING]
512
00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:13,000
Goddamn it.
513
00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:21,680
Armadillo. They've been infiltrating
my perimeter all summer.
514
00:35:21,840 --> 00:35:25,320
- The hell you do with them?
- I make helmets.
515
00:35:25,480 --> 00:35:29,360
Armadillo helmets can block
even the best brain-wave scanners.
516
00:35:29,520 --> 00:35:31,680
Make a pretty good soup bowl too.
517
00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:34,680
So okay. I'm gonna
go to work on this thing.
518
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:38,720
While I do, would you be a dear, Bo,
and go grab me that armadillo?
519
00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:43,640
Thanks.
520
00:35:45,040 --> 00:35:46,360
BO:
Man, he looks pissed off.
521
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:47,880
[GUNSHOT]
522
00:35:49,040 --> 00:35:52,280
Come on, y'all! That was a good one.
523
00:35:52,680 --> 00:35:55,400
All right, maybe you could
take it off now.
524
00:35:55,840 --> 00:35:58,480
Got a real nice deal on this stuff.
Government issue.
525
00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:02,200
Only expired about six months ago,
so should have a real nice pop.
526
00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:05,800
Yeah! Cooter's got
the General running.
527
00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:09,720
- Might be able to race on Saturday.
- Really?
528
00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:13,080
We gotta get it out of there tonight.
Rosco wants to impound it.
529
00:36:13,320 --> 00:36:15,320
SHEEV:
Watch your ass, fellas.
530
00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:24,400
LUKE: This is the fastest-burning
fuse you got, Sheev?
531
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:26,320
SHEEV:
It's a Chinese fuse.
532
00:36:35,200 --> 00:36:36,320
[POPS]
533
00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:39,080
Hmm.
534
00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:41,520
- Might be a wet fuse.
- Well, should we check it?
535
00:36:41,680 --> 00:36:44,520
Depends if you like how your face
is configured, pretty boy.
536
00:36:44,720 --> 00:36:46,400
I think you got the wires backwards.
537
00:36:46,560 --> 00:36:48,960
SHEEV: They're supposed to be.
It's a Chinese fuse.
538
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:51,320
No, backwards from how
they're supposed to be.
539
00:36:51,480 --> 00:36:54,120
You ever been to China?
Have you ever been to China?
540
00:36:54,280 --> 00:36:55,720
BO:
I ate Chinese food once.
541
00:36:55,880 --> 00:36:58,400
SHEEV: Well, you don't blow up
mu shu pork, my friend.
542
00:36:58,600 --> 00:37:00,120
I dated a Korean girl in school.
543
00:37:00,280 --> 00:37:02,800
That is a different Oriental nation.
Get an education.
544
00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:05,440
- You got the fuse wrong.
- You know nothing about...
545
00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:08,240
...Chino-Sino-American relations.
BO: You're missing the point.
546
00:37:19,920 --> 00:37:21,800
Might've used too much.
547
00:37:25,600 --> 00:37:28,000
Man, that rattled my sphincter.
548
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:35,000
BO:
What the hell is that? Drugs?
549
00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:36,880
Don't look like no drugs I ever saw.
550
00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:41,160
- What the hell are these numbers?
- It's a core sample.
551
00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:45,880
Mining. They drill a hole, take a sample,
send it to the lab, see what they got.
552
00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:48,120
- Core samples of what?
- How should I know?
553
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:52,120
Am I wearing a white coat here?
I cut bait and blow shit up for a living.
554
00:37:52,320 --> 00:37:56,280
- Take it to a lab.
- I don't know, maybe at the university?
555
00:37:56,480 --> 00:38:00,320
- Katie-Lynn Johnson's at the university.
- Oh, yeah, that's right.
556
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:03,280
Man, I always had a thing for that girl.
557
00:38:03,520 --> 00:38:06,880
Remember she used to come by
the farm with those tight little outfits?
558
00:38:07,040 --> 00:38:10,720
- No, I can't say I remember that.
- I thought I had her too.
559
00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:14,840
Then she pulled a goddamn Keyser Soze
on me, and like that...
560
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:16,560
...she was gone.
561
00:38:16,720 --> 00:38:18,880
You don't remember that?
562
00:38:19,080 --> 00:38:20,360
SHEEV:
Well, okay.
563
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:24,240
Unless you need something else blown,
I'll go inside and wash my mongoose.
564
00:38:27,440 --> 00:38:29,200
Okay.
565
00:38:30,160 --> 00:38:32,640
Come on, Luke. Let's get the General.
566
00:38:32,960 --> 00:38:35,160
Why don't we have Cooter stash that.
567
00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:37,400
We'll take his truck,
head to the highway...
568
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:42,040
How would you feel if the General and I
went to Atlanta and left you behind?
569
00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:11,120
Ain't she a Georgia peach?
570
00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:13,480
What'd you do,
make a deal with the devil?
571
00:39:13,800 --> 00:39:16,600
Luke. Luke. Is that a Hemi?
572
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:21,840
Me and my buddies lose the Gettysburg
reenactment every other Sunday.
573
00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:24,200
So we figured,
why not let General Lee win one?
574
00:39:24,640 --> 00:39:27,240
LUKE: I don't know how
we're gonna pay you back, Cooter.
575
00:39:27,440 --> 00:39:31,080
Would a BJ from Daisy be within
the realm of possibility?
576
00:39:31,240 --> 00:39:33,120
Not gonna happen.
577
00:39:33,320 --> 00:39:35,480
How about a pair
of her still-warm shorts?
578
00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:37,640
- Uh-uh.
- All right.
579
00:39:37,800 --> 00:39:41,480
Hey, Bo, just win that Hazzard Rally.
That's thanks enough.
580
00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:45,800
And when you get that prize money, you
pay me, because that's how it works.
581
00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:48,200
I love you, Cooter.
582
00:39:50,160 --> 00:39:52,800
- I didn't have time to fix everything.
- Right.
583
00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:57,480
Let's get that car.
584
00:40:00,240 --> 00:40:01,280
[ENGINE REVVING]
585
00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:27,480
Get in your cars and get them!
Get after them! Now!
586
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:32,040
[HORN PLAYING "DIXIE"]
587
00:40:32,240 --> 00:40:34,240
[CHEERING]
588
00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:37,240
All right.
589
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:41,520
That's so good, man.
590
00:40:44,120 --> 00:40:45,960
Enough.
591
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:50,120
Man, I'm never gonna get out
of this car again. I'm gonna live in it.
592
00:40:50,320 --> 00:40:53,120
I'm gonna eat in it.
And I'm gonna make sweet love to it.
593
00:40:53,600 --> 00:40:55,560
You mean you gonna make
sweet love in it.
594
00:40:55,720 --> 00:40:57,320
Oh, no, I wanna fuck it.
595
00:40:57,520 --> 00:40:59,840
ROSCO [OVER CB RADIO]:
All units, we are in hot pursuit....
596
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:03,840
...of them Duke boys
in their piece-of-shit orange car.
597
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:05,240
[POLICE CAR RATTLING]
598
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:08,320
"Piece of..." You son of a bitch.
599
00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:28,840
ROSCO:
Hey! Get back here!
600
00:41:29,040 --> 00:41:30,920
COOTER [OVER RADIO]:
Lost Sheep, you out there?
601
00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:32,120
Hey, Cooter.
602
00:41:32,280 --> 00:41:35,680
COOTER: These fellas ain't
gonna be doing much chasing.
603
00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:38,920
- Thanks, man.
- I'm gonna run right over Billy Prickett.
604
00:41:39,080 --> 00:41:40,800
How about we go to Atlanta first?
605
00:41:40,960 --> 00:41:42,000
All right, cuz.
606
00:41:42,160 --> 00:41:43,600
[HORN PLAYING "DIXIE"]
607
00:41:45,800 --> 00:41:49,840
Oh, look at that.
There's your problem right there.
608
00:41:50,000 --> 00:41:51,360
Yeah, that's a shame.
609
00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:55,960
LUKE:
Let's go to Atlanta.
610
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:00,080
[HORNS HONKING]
611
00:42:03,080 --> 00:42:04,600
[LUKE SNORING]
612
00:42:05,840 --> 00:42:07,800
Luke.
613
00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:09,680
Luke.
614
00:42:11,120 --> 00:42:16,080
I know why it didn't work out with
me and Katie before. It was just timing.
615
00:42:16,240 --> 00:42:18,880
Life is all about timing, you know?
616
00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:22,680
It's my time now.
I'm gonna win that race on Saturday.
617
00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:26,600
We're gonna get the farm back.
I got my BFF, you.
618
00:42:27,400 --> 00:42:30,360
And I'm gonna get Katie Johnson,
you watch.
619
00:42:34,760 --> 00:42:36,920
It's my time.
620
00:42:38,240 --> 00:42:41,640
What's going on?
621
00:42:42,240 --> 00:42:43,720
[HORN HONKS]
622
00:42:44,440 --> 00:42:47,280
Yeah, baby!
Southern by the grace of God!
623
00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:50,880
- Yee-haw!
- Yee-haw!
624
00:42:52,640 --> 00:42:55,160
Well, at least we know
they're nice up here.
625
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:58,920
Hurry up, you're late
for your Klan meeting, asshole.
626
00:42:59,160 --> 00:43:01,720
- Klan meeting?
MAN: Don't listen to her.
627
00:43:01,880 --> 00:43:05,280
The South will rise again.
Yee-haw!
628
00:43:05,440 --> 00:43:07,720
Yee-haw, brother!
629
00:43:07,880 --> 00:43:09,840
What the hell's wrong
with these people?
630
00:43:10,040 --> 00:43:13,200
Nice roof, redneck.
Join us in the 21st century?
631
00:43:21,680 --> 00:43:24,400
LUKE: We're gonna make
some friends up here, huh?
632
00:43:33,720 --> 00:43:36,320
Oh, excuse me.
Can I help you, ma'am?
633
00:43:36,520 --> 00:43:38,360
Daisy! Oh, boy.
634
00:43:38,600 --> 00:43:40,920
Enos, what's Boss doing
taking all that land?
635
00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:45,320
I don't know. They won't tell me. You
gotta go. I'm supposed to arrest you.
636
00:43:45,480 --> 00:43:48,160
- Come on, I'm serious.
- Get. Get out of here.
637
00:43:48,320 --> 00:43:51,480
Hey. You Anus?
638
00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:54,080
No, that's Enos, Mr. Prickett.
639
00:43:54,320 --> 00:43:55,680
Oh, whoopsie.
640
00:43:55,880 --> 00:43:59,200
Sorry about that. Is Hogg around?
He asked me to come by.
641
00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:03,840
Oh, yeah. He's out back
in the garage, Mr. Prickett.
642
00:44:05,240 --> 00:44:07,520
Well, howdy, ma'am.
How are you today?
643
00:44:07,680 --> 00:44:10,040
It's just right on out back there.
I'll show you.
644
00:44:10,200 --> 00:44:13,120
Yep, head out that way.
645
00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:18,200
There you go.
646
00:44:20,320 --> 00:44:22,200
BOSS:
There he is.
647
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:24,360
- Hometown hero.
- Hogg.
648
00:44:24,520 --> 00:44:26,200
- How you doing, son?
- Well...
649
00:44:26,360 --> 00:44:29,680
...this is a great place to crap,
but I'm ready to head to Atlanta.
650
00:44:29,840 --> 00:44:31,200
Not before the race.
651
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:33,680
BILLY:
Don't you worry about that.
652
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:37,000
BOSS: I want you down at that finish
line. Sign autographs for the kids.
653
00:44:37,160 --> 00:44:39,360
BILLY: Yeah, I know the drill.
BOSS: I know you do.
654
00:44:39,560 --> 00:44:42,520
But I need you there for two hours, son.
Two hours.
655
00:44:42,800 --> 00:44:44,920
Kissing hands and shaking babies.
656
00:44:45,080 --> 00:44:48,760
You got that backwards.
It's shaking hands and kiss the babies.
657
00:44:48,920 --> 00:44:52,880
Oh, yeah? Maybe that's why I lost
that governor's election in '86.
658
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:54,680
[LAUGHING]
659
00:44:57,600 --> 00:44:59,680
Hogg, what the hell am I doing here?
660
00:44:59,880 --> 00:45:01,840
Rosco.
661
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:07,680
Whoa, what is this?
You off the reservation?
662
00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:10,600
See how it kind of catches me
around the eyes there?
663
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:14,080
BILLY:
Look here, I already got sponsors.
664
00:45:14,240 --> 00:45:17,040
What am I supposed
to tell Castrol, Yahoo!?
665
00:45:17,200 --> 00:45:19,600
Tell them it's for charity.
666
00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:22,080
- Is it?
- Sure. Could be.
667
00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:27,000
Whatever you say.
I'm gonna win that race by a mile.
668
00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:29,760
It don't matter whose face
is on my car when I do.
669
00:45:29,920 --> 00:45:35,120
I don't need you to win the race.
I just need you to show up.
670
00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:50,720
Hey there, Mr. Prickett.
671
00:45:50,880 --> 00:45:53,320
Well, hello, Daisy.
672
00:45:53,480 --> 00:45:58,600
I was just walking by, and I saw your car
in the garage there. She's real sexy.
673
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:02,120
Well, thank you.
She's faster than a cheetah on cocaine.
674
00:46:02,280 --> 00:46:04,040
DAISY:
Yeah, I know.
675
00:46:04,280 --> 00:46:06,960
Why is there a picture of Boss Hogg
on your car, though?
676
00:46:07,120 --> 00:46:09,240
- Yeah, well, he...
- I read somewhere...
677
00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:15,120
...that Coca-Cola pays you over
$100,000 to put their logo on your door.
678
00:46:15,320 --> 00:46:17,000
- You read that?
- That same article...
679
00:46:17,160 --> 00:46:20,000
...mentioned that Budweiser
pays you over $100,000...
680
00:46:20,160 --> 00:46:22,840
- ...to put their logo on your trunk.
- Look, Daisy...
681
00:46:23,000 --> 00:46:25,920
- ...I'm not much of a reader.
- Boss Hogg's face is sitting...
682
00:46:26,080 --> 00:46:29,760
...on over $200,000 worth
of real estate.
683
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:31,440
Is that what he's paying you?
684
00:46:31,640 --> 00:46:36,240
Oh, no, no, Daisy,
this race here is for charity.
685
00:46:36,440 --> 00:46:38,400
Really? Which one?
686
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:41,800
Anal bifida.
687
00:46:41,960 --> 00:46:43,640
Spinal bifida.
688
00:46:43,960 --> 00:46:45,520
It's one of the bifidas.
689
00:46:45,760 --> 00:46:47,120
[LAUGHING]
690
00:46:47,640 --> 00:46:51,480
Have I told you that you're as purty
as a Hazzard County sunset?
691
00:46:51,640 --> 00:46:54,880
Have a good day, Mr. Prickett.
692
00:46:55,040 --> 00:46:57,400
Okay.
693
00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:17,560
Lot of smart people out there.
694
00:47:40,760 --> 00:47:42,960
Look out, Katie.
695
00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:48,480
Hello. Hi.
696
00:47:48,840 --> 00:47:50,320
- Hello.
BO: Hello.
697
00:47:50,520 --> 00:47:53,600
LUKE: Oh, boy.
- Hi.
698
00:47:54,600 --> 00:47:58,680
You don't think it's too late
to take them SATs, do you?
699
00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:05,480
You gotta keep an open mind
in college.
700
00:48:07,200 --> 00:48:10,440
This is it, Luke. I can feel it.
701
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:13,200
Hey, do you know
where Katie Johnson is?
702
00:48:13,360 --> 00:48:15,240
I think she's in that room right there.
703
00:48:15,400 --> 00:48:17,400
LUKE: Thanks.
- Thank you.
704
00:48:20,200 --> 00:48:22,680
- I got a great opening line for Katie.
- What is it?
705
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:24,640
You'll see.
706
00:48:24,800 --> 00:48:27,640
- Katie Johnson?
- She's down the hall.
707
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:31,360
- Cool.
- Come on, down the hall.
708
00:48:34,120 --> 00:48:36,240
Katie Johnson?
709
00:48:36,400 --> 00:48:39,640
- She's down the hall.
- Do you guys go to school here?
710
00:48:40,760 --> 00:48:42,880
No, but do you have an application?
711
00:48:43,240 --> 00:48:44,400
Not on me.
712
00:48:44,560 --> 00:48:46,120
[GIRLS GIGGLING]
713
00:48:46,640 --> 00:48:49,040
Come on, now, focus.
714
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:56,280
Let's hope she's not in here either.
715
00:48:56,480 --> 00:48:59,160
- Katie Johnson?
- Fuck me running!
716
00:48:59,720 --> 00:49:02,640
- You looking for Katie?
- We were.
717
00:49:03,040 --> 00:49:05,840
- You guys Hacky?
- Hacky!
718
00:49:06,040 --> 00:49:08,160
- What about Katie?
- Maybe she's in here.
719
00:49:08,360 --> 00:49:09,960
[WHOOPING]
720
00:49:16,200 --> 00:49:18,680
LUKE: Bye.
GIRL: Goodbye, Bo. Bye, Luke.
721
00:49:19,080 --> 00:49:20,920
I guess she wasn't in there.
722
00:49:21,080 --> 00:49:23,680
- We didn't check under the couch.
KATIE: Luke! Bo!
723
00:49:23,880 --> 00:49:26,000
- Katie.
- Katie-Lynn.
724
00:49:30,360 --> 00:49:32,560
So he's still doing that?
725
00:49:34,080 --> 00:49:36,920
- Did I just faint?
- No.
726
00:49:37,120 --> 00:49:39,360
Oh, my God. I can't believe y'all came.
727
00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:43,360
[MUMBLING] We just wanna pay
you visit, the prettiest girl in Atlanta.
728
00:49:43,720 --> 00:49:45,560
What?
729
00:49:45,720 --> 00:49:49,200
[MUMBLING] We just wanna pay a visit
to the prettiest girl in Atlanta.
730
00:49:49,400 --> 00:49:52,440
That's sweet. I can't believe
what happened to y'all's farm.
731
00:49:52,640 --> 00:49:54,200
We're gonna get it back.
732
00:49:54,400 --> 00:49:57,240
I love that farm.
I used to have so much fun there.
733
00:49:57,840 --> 00:49:59,520
- See?
KATIE: This is my roommate, Annette.
734
00:49:59,680 --> 00:50:02,240
- Annette, this is Bo and Luke.
- Nice to meet you.
735
00:50:02,400 --> 00:50:05,640
- Ma'am.
- Annette's from Australia.
736
00:50:05,920 --> 00:50:09,160
Let's put another shrimp
on the barbie!
737
00:50:12,400 --> 00:50:14,760
- That's what they say there.
- Okay.
738
00:50:14,920 --> 00:50:16,880
What do y'all need
in the geology lab?
739
00:50:17,040 --> 00:50:19,760
It has something to do
with them taking our farm...
740
00:50:19,920 --> 00:50:22,560
...but we don't know
what the hell it is.
741
00:50:24,120 --> 00:50:26,920
I don't know that they'll let y'all in,
but we'll take you.
742
00:50:27,120 --> 00:50:30,360
- We'll get dressed. Y'all wait downstairs.
- We're gonna wait here.
743
00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:32,720
Downstairs is fine.
744
00:50:36,320 --> 00:50:39,320
It's happening, Luke.
It's all happening.
745
00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:49,880
I'll give you that, Jesse.
746
00:50:50,040 --> 00:50:53,080
- I'll give you that.
JESSE: Will you now?
747
00:50:54,200 --> 00:50:57,000
What are you doing with my land,
Jefferson?
748
00:50:57,800 --> 00:50:59,840
Ain't your land anymore.
749
00:51:00,400 --> 00:51:03,760
Wasn't that long ago you was
a moonshiner too. Remember?
750
00:51:03,920 --> 00:51:05,800
Well, I have reformed from my sins.
751
00:51:05,960 --> 00:51:08,520
I am now an honest businessman.
752
00:51:08,680 --> 00:51:10,440
Like sponsoring racecars?
753
00:51:10,680 --> 00:51:13,800
What are you getting out of bringing
Billy Prickett down here?
754
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:19,480
You know, your nephew's won that race
four years in a row.
755
00:51:19,680 --> 00:51:23,320
Now, who's gonna fault me
for breaking up a dynasty?
756
00:51:23,480 --> 00:51:25,600
Well, I know you're rich,
and I know you stink.
757
00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:27,600
But you ain't stinking rich.
758
00:51:27,800 --> 00:51:30,040
You wouldn't be throwing
that money at Prickett...
759
00:51:30,240 --> 00:51:32,880
...unless you thought he was
gonna earn you 10 times that.
760
00:51:33,040 --> 00:51:37,840
You're a smart man.
So why don't you do the smart thing.
761
00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:41,040
Why don't you take your family
and leave.
762
00:51:41,240 --> 00:51:44,840
Because, see, now I own that farm.
763
00:51:45,000 --> 00:51:47,600
And you ain't never gonna get it back.
764
00:51:47,760 --> 00:51:49,840
[LAUGHING]
765
00:52:00,200 --> 00:52:03,080
I have all the cards, Jesse.
766
00:52:03,240 --> 00:52:04,960
You don't have spit.
767
00:52:05,440 --> 00:52:07,520
It ain't over yet.
768
00:52:12,280 --> 00:52:15,360
Hey, Bo, I love your car.
She really rumbles.
769
00:52:15,680 --> 00:52:18,360
It's actually a he. Right, Katie?
770
00:52:21,920 --> 00:52:23,800
[SIRENS WAILING]
771
00:52:25,320 --> 00:52:26,880
I ain't even speeding.
772
00:52:44,880 --> 00:52:47,160
You know how fast you were going?
773
00:52:47,320 --> 00:52:52,120
- What?
- How fast you were going.
774
00:52:53,040 --> 00:52:55,880
- I don't know. Ten?
- Eight.
775
00:52:56,040 --> 00:53:01,080
- Isn't the speed limit 10?
- Yeah. It is.
776
00:53:01,560 --> 00:53:04,040
You guys police?
777
00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:05,840
Campus police.
778
00:53:06,320 --> 00:53:07,800
[LAUGHING]
779
00:53:12,480 --> 00:53:14,520
Mother of God.
780
00:53:23,520 --> 00:53:25,040
Oh, wait.
781
00:53:35,520 --> 00:53:39,560
I know it's a shame to hide your beauty
like this, but it's for your own good.
782
00:53:39,720 --> 00:53:41,120
What?
783
00:53:41,680 --> 00:53:43,960
I'm not even gonna respond to that.
That's crazy.
784
00:53:44,320 --> 00:53:48,120
I know, I'll miss you too.
I'll be right back.
785
00:53:48,680 --> 00:53:51,520
All right, let's go. Let's go.
786
00:53:57,080 --> 00:54:01,400
Katie-Lynn seems like a girl you could
settle down with, don't you think, Luke?
787
00:54:01,560 --> 00:54:03,320
- Yeah.
- I don't know, fellas.
788
00:54:03,480 --> 00:54:05,760
I don't think they're gonna
let us walk in.
789
00:54:05,960 --> 00:54:10,600
You'll think of something, Katie.
You always do. Remember that...?
790
00:54:10,800 --> 00:54:13,400
Oh, you're so pretty.
791
00:54:25,160 --> 00:54:27,640
I have an idea.
792
00:54:34,680 --> 00:54:38,080
- Can I help you?
- You're just the guy we're looking for...
793
00:54:38,240 --> 00:54:39,960
- Royce.
- Royce...?
794
00:54:40,160 --> 00:54:43,840
- Royce Williams.
- Royce Williams, maybe you can help us.
795
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:49,160
We're here looking for the brightest
young geologists for high-paying jobs.
796
00:54:49,400 --> 00:54:50,840
Maybe you've been by our booth.
797
00:54:51,040 --> 00:54:54,360
- You're from Kamasaka Technologies?
LUKE: That's right.
798
00:54:54,520 --> 00:54:58,360
I'm Mr. Ichinowa,
and this is my colleague...
799
00:54:58,520 --> 00:55:00,000
...Yoko Takanoshi.
800
00:55:00,280 --> 00:55:01,440
[SPEAKING JAPANESE]
801
00:55:01,640 --> 00:55:02,960
Right on.
802
00:55:03,760 --> 00:55:05,520
You said you were Japanese?
803
00:55:06,120 --> 00:55:07,400
We converted.
804
00:55:09,000 --> 00:55:12,480
Your professor tells us you're some
kind of super-genius or something.
805
00:55:12,680 --> 00:55:16,880
- Really? On my last test I got a C-minus.
- Hey, that's good.
806
00:55:17,040 --> 00:55:20,120
- That's real good.
- You think...?
807
00:55:20,280 --> 00:55:22,560
You just might be
Kamasaka Tech material.
808
00:55:23,200 --> 00:55:25,520
You just gotta pass this one little test.
809
00:55:25,680 --> 00:55:29,480
You just tell us what this is right here.
810
00:55:29,720 --> 00:55:32,000
Looks like a core sample.
811
00:55:32,160 --> 00:55:35,280
- Man, that's good.
- He's good.
812
00:55:35,480 --> 00:55:39,080
- Core sample of what?
- Oh, of course.
813
00:55:42,520 --> 00:55:43,520
[KATIE CLEARS THROAT]
814
00:55:55,680 --> 00:55:58,480
- What are you doing?
- What?
815
00:55:58,640 --> 00:56:02,800
- What the fuck was that?
- Relax.
816
00:56:12,240 --> 00:56:14,040
Damn! Damn!
817
00:56:14,520 --> 00:56:16,200
These are my good Levi's.
818
00:56:16,360 --> 00:56:18,440
Let's not lose focus here, Royce.
819
00:56:18,600 --> 00:56:20,200
Yes, sir, Mr. Takanoshi.
820
00:56:20,360 --> 00:56:23,000
- What'd you call me?
- Mr. Takanoshi?
821
00:56:23,600 --> 00:56:26,760
Right. That's my name.
822
00:56:28,040 --> 00:56:32,000
- Thought it might be drugs or something.
- I think I know what it is.
823
00:56:32,240 --> 00:56:33,920
[GRUNTING]
824
00:56:34,080 --> 00:56:35,560
[LAUGHING]
825
00:56:40,880 --> 00:56:42,480
[COUGHS]
826
00:56:44,560 --> 00:56:47,040
Are you really with
Kamasaka Technologies?
827
00:56:47,200 --> 00:56:49,960
Damn it, we are high-powered
Japanese executives.
828
00:56:50,160 --> 00:56:52,760
We work hard,
and we play even harder.
829
00:56:52,960 --> 00:56:54,640
Now, tell us what you see there...
830
00:56:54,800 --> 00:56:57,800
...or we'll go find another candidate
at Georgia Polytech.
831
00:56:58,000 --> 00:57:00,880
It's anthracite.
832
00:57:01,400 --> 00:57:04,720
- Coal.
- Coal in Hazzard?
833
00:57:04,880 --> 00:57:08,080
- What's the street value of this?
- This much? Nothing.
834
00:57:08,240 --> 00:57:10,640
A good-sized mine? Could be millions.
835
00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:13,600
Can you show us what
a good-sized mine looks like?
836
00:57:13,760 --> 00:57:15,840
Yeah.
837
00:57:18,760 --> 00:57:22,280
Here's what it used to look like.
And this is the after.
838
00:57:26,960 --> 00:57:29,120
BO:
Damn.
839
00:57:29,560 --> 00:57:33,400
- Hogg's gonna do this to Hazzard?
- The hell he is.
840
00:57:33,760 --> 00:57:36,560
Mr. Kamasaka? We have to go.
The plane is leaving.
841
00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:40,680
Congratulations, Royce. You got the job.
How does 24,000 yen a year sound?
842
00:57:41,040 --> 00:57:42,920
Sounds like 40 bucks.
843
00:57:43,080 --> 00:57:44,440
Way to go.
844
00:57:44,600 --> 00:57:48,000
All right, man. See you in Beijing.
845
00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:55,880
- You see two guys come through here?
- You mean those two Japanese guys?
846
00:58:15,040 --> 00:58:17,600
Get me Atlanta P. D. Damn.
847
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:19,040
JESSE:
Strip-mining?
848
00:58:19,280 --> 00:58:20,680
Why, that slimy bastard.
849
00:58:21,040 --> 00:58:22,880
JESSE [OVER RADIO]:
Here's another little nugget.
850
00:58:23,080 --> 00:58:25,880
Hogg has been paying
that kid Prickett a lot of money...
851
00:58:26,120 --> 00:58:28,400
- ...to race here Saturday.
- He's paying him?
852
00:58:28,920 --> 00:58:32,160
Y'all better get your asses back here
quick as you can, got it?
853
00:58:32,360 --> 00:58:34,760
Ten-four, Shepherd,
this is Lost Sheep out.
854
00:58:36,520 --> 00:58:39,200
MAN: What's this? What's
these crackers doing in our place?
855
00:58:39,400 --> 00:58:43,000
Turns out Prickett came back because
Hogg paid him a assload of cash.
856
00:58:43,320 --> 00:58:46,240
Don't mean Billy has anything
to do with strip-mining.
857
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:48,120
You got to be kidding me.
858
00:58:48,760 --> 00:58:50,680
Oh, shit. Roll them up.
859
00:58:51,520 --> 00:58:54,440
- What the hell is this, man?
- Looks like somebody's lost.
860
00:58:54,640 --> 00:58:58,040
Look, a couple of white boys playing
black. Is that's what's going on?
861
00:58:58,200 --> 00:59:01,720
Actually, we were at the geology lab
for some environmental stuff, and...
862
00:59:01,920 --> 00:59:06,880
No, I get it. They on one of these
reality shows.
863
00:59:07,080 --> 00:59:09,960
- Who Wanna Get They Ass Kicked?
MAN: Yeah.
864
00:59:10,720 --> 00:59:14,720
Why don't you two hillbillies
join us up here for a minute?
865
00:59:14,880 --> 00:59:16,920
Actually, we prefer
Appalachian-Americans.
866
00:59:17,080 --> 00:59:18,720
Man, get out the car!
867
00:59:20,880 --> 00:59:24,640
Now, which one of you two
brothers is Michelangelo?
868
00:59:26,160 --> 00:59:27,640
BALLADEER:
There's a certain creek....
869
00:59:27,800 --> 00:59:30,680
...that people sometimes
canoe up without a paddle.
870
00:59:30,880 --> 00:59:35,520
You could say that the Duke boys
were on that particular creek right now.
871
00:59:35,720 --> 00:59:38,040
Let's kick they ass, Jerry!
872
00:59:38,240 --> 00:59:39,520
[SIREN WAILS]
873
00:59:39,720 --> 00:59:42,480
Never thought I'd say this,
but, hot damn, it's the cops.
874
00:59:43,800 --> 00:59:45,880
Whoops. There goes the canoe.
875
00:59:51,000 --> 00:59:53,040
- Give me your shoelaces.
- What?
876
00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:57,640
These guys over there gave me theirs.
See, I'm gonna fashion myself a lasso.
877
00:59:57,800 --> 01:00:01,440
When the jailer comes in,
I'm gonna rope his keys.
878
01:00:01,600 --> 01:00:05,640
Luke and Bo Duke are home free.
Period, end of story.
879
01:00:05,840 --> 01:00:08,920
I got on cowboy boots, cuz.
880
01:00:09,120 --> 01:00:11,920
I like your style.
881
01:00:12,080 --> 01:00:13,960
You gonna need those shoelaces?
882
01:00:14,160 --> 01:00:17,120
We gonna have to get out of here.
883
01:00:17,360 --> 01:00:21,680
Hey, Yul Brynner. We gotta make
a phone call. We gotta call our lawyer.
884
01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:23,520
What the hell are we in here for?
885
01:00:23,840 --> 01:00:28,320
BOSS:
Well, where should I start?
886
01:00:34,360 --> 01:00:36,320
We know you're gonna
strip-mine Hazzard.
887
01:00:36,480 --> 01:00:39,920
Do you, now? Well, that's good.
888
01:00:40,120 --> 01:00:42,440
Guess where I'm gonna sink
that first drill.
889
01:00:42,600 --> 01:00:45,280
Right down in the middle
of your bedroom.
890
01:00:45,440 --> 01:00:49,280
Y'all do still share a bunk bed, right?
891
01:00:49,440 --> 01:00:52,640
Hey, that's a phat suit there.
What, you some type of pimp?
892
01:00:55,240 --> 01:01:00,040
What has strip-mining got to do with you
paying Billy Prickett to race tomorrow?
893
01:01:00,440 --> 01:01:03,240
You like magic, Luke? Sleight of hand?
894
01:01:03,400 --> 01:01:09,560
See, while you're looking over here,
something's really happening over here.
895
01:01:09,840 --> 01:01:15,160
You see, despite the fact
that I now own your beloved farm...
896
01:01:15,400 --> 01:01:20,080
...I can't legally mine it,
because the county won't let me.
897
01:01:20,360 --> 01:01:22,760
I need to hold a public hearing,
you know...
898
01:01:22,920 --> 01:01:28,520
...to give the citizens of Hazzard
a chance to object.
899
01:01:29,200 --> 01:01:33,040
And let me guess, you're going to hold
the hearing during the rally tomorrow?
900
01:01:33,240 --> 01:01:37,520
And if nobody knows about the hearing,
there won't be anyone there to object.
901
01:01:38,560 --> 01:01:40,600
- There you go.
- Sleight of hand.
902
01:01:40,800 --> 01:01:43,080
- Sleight of hand.
MAN: Grow the fingernails out.
903
01:01:43,280 --> 01:01:46,280
Then pop some fingernail polish
on them bitches.
904
01:01:47,600 --> 01:01:49,840
- Is Billy Prickett in on it?
BOSS: Prickett?
905
01:01:51,880 --> 01:01:56,560
- Prickett's just collecting a paycheck.
- We ain't gonna let you get away with it.
906
01:01:56,760 --> 01:02:01,600
Really? Tomorrow, if you happen to be
strolling by the courthouse about noon...
907
01:02:01,760 --> 01:02:05,040
...you might wanna rush right in there
and voice your objections.
908
01:02:05,240 --> 01:02:06,760
MAN:
Voice this.
909
01:02:08,840 --> 01:02:11,640
Dadgum it. I just remembered.
910
01:02:11,840 --> 01:02:15,120
Tomorrow morning
you're going to the Georgia work farm.
911
01:02:15,320 --> 01:02:19,440
And I hear they have a rather
strict policy on weekend passes.
912
01:02:19,600 --> 01:02:22,560
Yo, B. You need to pop
a feather in that hat, yo.
913
01:02:22,720 --> 01:02:25,400
Then your man ho's will be having
more respect for you.
914
01:02:25,760 --> 01:02:27,480
I have $100 right here...
915
01:02:27,640 --> 01:02:30,400
...for whoever knocks
that loudmouth son of a bitch out.
916
01:02:32,360 --> 01:02:33,760
Thank you.
917
01:02:33,920 --> 01:02:36,480
Now, break some rocks for me, boys.
918
01:02:36,640 --> 01:02:39,320
Take care, now, you hear?
919
01:02:39,480 --> 01:02:41,600
Bye-bye.
920
01:02:42,760 --> 01:02:46,360
Don't you know you're not supposed
to wear white after Labor Day?
921
01:03:05,240 --> 01:03:07,120
All right, this is what we're gonna do.
922
01:03:07,280 --> 01:03:11,640
When we stop for gas, we call up Cooter
and tell him to put a pig in the road.
923
01:03:11,840 --> 01:03:16,000
Then when the cops are moving the pig,
Cooter hooks up a cable to the bumper.
924
01:03:16,200 --> 01:03:19,600
Car drives away,
the hook will pull out the whole chassis.
925
01:03:19,760 --> 01:03:22,200
He can't drive without a chassis...
926
01:03:22,400 --> 01:03:24,040
All right, shut up back there!
927
01:03:24,200 --> 01:03:27,200
My cousin's starting to go crazy.
We gotta get him to a hospital.
928
01:03:27,400 --> 01:03:29,720
I think he done caught the fever
or something.
929
01:03:29,920 --> 01:03:33,440
That's what happens
when you're humping livestock, hillbilly.
930
01:03:33,600 --> 01:03:36,000
Can we help you guys out
with anything up there...
931
01:03:36,160 --> 01:03:38,360
...oblige you with a reach-around
or something?
932
01:03:38,560 --> 01:03:40,880
Of course, you'd have to un-cuff us first.
933
01:03:41,040 --> 01:03:44,400
Sarge, if you and me was to have
a chase, you think you could catch me?
934
01:03:44,920 --> 01:03:48,040
- Appears to me you caught already, son.
- I'm serious.
935
01:03:48,240 --> 01:03:52,120
If I had my car and you was in this one,
you really think you could catch me?
936
01:03:52,280 --> 01:03:55,000
Because, bubba,
this car feels kind of slow to me.
937
01:03:55,160 --> 01:03:58,120
She's got plenty under the hood,
don't you worry about that.
938
01:03:58,320 --> 01:03:59,880
- No balls.
- No balls.
939
01:04:00,080 --> 01:04:02,240
LUKE:
No balls. No balls.
940
01:04:02,440 --> 01:04:03,840
- No balls.
- No balls.
941
01:04:04,000 --> 01:04:06,000
You wanna see balls?
942
01:04:06,160 --> 01:04:09,000
LUKE: No balls. No balls.
OFFICER: Will you slow this car down?
943
01:04:09,160 --> 01:04:12,520
You letting them get your panties
in a bunch. You the officer.
944
01:04:12,680 --> 01:04:15,080
Shut the hell up back there. All right?
945
01:04:15,360 --> 01:04:18,760
BO: No balls.
- Oh, my God. Will you look at that?
946
01:04:18,960 --> 01:04:22,000
You need a napkin
to eat them drumsticks, boy.
947
01:04:23,640 --> 01:04:25,640
- Goddamn it.
- Nice driving!
948
01:04:25,840 --> 01:04:27,280
[LUKE LAUGHING]
949
01:04:32,240 --> 01:04:34,280
What seems to be the problem, sugar?
950
01:04:34,760 --> 01:04:37,560
I think something bounced up
into my undercarriage.
951
01:04:37,760 --> 01:04:40,080
- Will you take a look?
- Ma'am, I'd be pleased...
952
01:04:40,240 --> 01:04:42,600
- ...to check your undercarriage.
- Thank you.
953
01:04:42,760 --> 01:04:45,320
I stopped you
because your taillight is out.
954
01:04:45,520 --> 01:04:47,280
Stopped me? Sir, you hit me.
955
01:04:47,480 --> 01:04:50,440
Because your taillight is out,
and we couldn't see you brake.
956
01:04:50,640 --> 01:04:53,000
MAN: You're gonna write me a ticket?
OFFICER: Yep.
957
01:04:53,280 --> 01:04:55,200
MAN:
This is ridiculous!
958
01:04:57,640 --> 01:05:00,480
Is there anything I can help you out
with today, ma'am?
959
01:05:00,720 --> 01:05:03,520
Do cute cops grow on trees
around here or what?
960
01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:07,760
Well, I, you know... Pushups.
Kind of you to notice.
961
01:05:07,920 --> 01:05:10,480
Let me see what's going on
under your hood here.
962
01:05:11,560 --> 01:05:12,640
DAISY:
Oops.
963
01:05:12,800 --> 01:05:16,560
- Damn, that's hot.
- Here. Maybe this'll help.
964
01:05:20,520 --> 01:05:23,880
- Bless you.
- No, no, no. My undercarriage.
965
01:05:24,040 --> 01:05:26,440
- Your undercarriage?
DAISY: Yeah.
966
01:05:33,840 --> 01:05:37,280
Looks like you boys
have the magic touch.
967
01:05:47,160 --> 01:05:49,480
I was about to seal the deal
when you came over.
968
01:05:49,640 --> 01:05:51,840
What? She was looking at me
the whole time.
969
01:05:53,360 --> 01:05:56,200
OFFICER: Let's get out of here.
- Where are the goddamn keys?
970
01:06:01,640 --> 01:06:04,120
Y'all think you can catch me now?
971
01:06:16,320 --> 01:06:17,800
[CHEERING]
972
01:06:18,680 --> 01:06:20,560
Buckle up, this might get exciting.
973
01:06:20,720 --> 01:06:23,600
That's all right. We'll be long gone
before another cop shows up.
974
01:06:23,760 --> 01:06:25,360
[SIRENS WAILING]
975
01:06:25,600 --> 01:06:26,760
Get skinny!
976
01:06:37,960 --> 01:06:40,520
- Okay, where's the highway?
- Don't you have a map?
977
01:06:41,640 --> 01:06:43,080
Wait. I got it.
978
01:06:46,600 --> 01:06:47,960
Turn left up here!
979
01:06:48,120 --> 01:06:49,400
Turn left, turn left!
980
01:06:50,960 --> 01:06:52,960
Damn it, I said, left!
981
01:06:53,160 --> 01:06:55,480
- You said your left!
- My left is your left.
982
01:06:55,640 --> 01:06:58,360
I'm gonna need
these directions faster.
983
01:07:01,160 --> 01:07:04,040
It's okay.
I know exactly where we're at.
984
01:07:11,680 --> 01:07:13,320
So, girls, how's the back seat?
985
01:07:13,480 --> 01:07:17,480
I haven't had this much fun since
we used to sneak up to the hayloft.
986
01:07:19,080 --> 01:07:22,200
You remember those tight little outfits
you used to make me wear.
987
01:07:25,960 --> 01:07:27,360
[CHUCKLES]
988
01:07:27,520 --> 01:07:31,120
- I didn't know how to break it to you.
- You didn't know?
989
01:07:31,280 --> 01:07:33,160
Luke, you said he was okay with it.
990
01:07:36,800 --> 01:07:39,200
Look at the road, Bo.
991
01:07:39,440 --> 01:07:41,520
Bo, look at the road.
992
01:07:42,560 --> 01:07:45,840
- Look at the road.
- Supposed to be my time.
993
01:07:47,080 --> 01:07:48,440
LUKE:
Bo!
994
01:08:09,600 --> 01:08:10,960
I think I'm gonna chunder.
995
01:08:11,120 --> 01:08:13,000
- Is that bad?
- That means "vomit."
996
01:08:13,200 --> 01:08:14,720
- Not in the car.
- Bo!
997
01:08:25,240 --> 01:08:26,600
[HORN HONKING]
998
01:08:41,520 --> 01:08:44,480
You told me she wasn't
emotionally available for me.
999
01:08:44,640 --> 01:08:47,760
That it was better to lose a lover
than to love a loser!
1000
01:08:47,920 --> 01:08:50,280
Because you would faint
every time you saw her!
1001
01:08:50,440 --> 01:08:53,000
I don't faint.
1002
01:08:55,080 --> 01:08:56,520
You called me a loser?
1003
01:08:56,720 --> 01:08:58,680
I was trying to make him feel better.
1004
01:08:58,840 --> 01:09:00,440
Can you just let me out here?
1005
01:09:14,280 --> 01:09:17,560
Bo, this is some of the best driving
I ever seen you do.
1006
01:09:17,760 --> 01:09:20,680
- Ain't that right, girls?
- Great driving, Bo. Great driving.
1007
01:09:20,840 --> 01:09:22,520
Don't kiss my ass.
1008
01:09:27,880 --> 01:09:30,880
- Bo, you gotta get us out of here.
- I can't hear you.
1009
01:09:31,080 --> 01:09:34,040
- You're being ridiculous, Bo.
- Life is ridiculous, Katie.
1010
01:09:34,280 --> 01:09:36,280
I really need a plastic bag now.
1011
01:09:42,160 --> 01:09:44,160
What is the purpose of this circle?
1012
01:09:47,800 --> 01:09:49,160
How do we get out of here?
1013
01:09:49,320 --> 01:09:51,520
- Take this right.
- I'm not listening to you.
1014
01:09:51,680 --> 01:09:53,640
Take a right here.
1015
01:09:55,240 --> 01:09:56,560
Hell.
1016
01:10:06,440 --> 01:10:08,680
You're scaring the girls.
Get back on the road.
1017
01:10:08,840 --> 01:10:11,720
- Say sorry for stealing Katie.
- You were never together!
1018
01:10:11,880 --> 01:10:13,520
I liked her. You betrayed that.
1019
01:10:13,720 --> 01:10:16,360
- I liked her too!
- I liked her first.
1020
01:10:17,400 --> 01:10:18,680
Calm down, Bo!
1021
01:10:18,840 --> 01:10:20,840
I will calm down
when he says he's sorry!
1022
01:10:21,000 --> 01:10:23,080
- Say you're sorry.
- I ain't saying it.
1023
01:10:23,240 --> 01:10:25,560
Have you made your peace
with God yet, Luke?
1024
01:10:25,720 --> 01:10:29,200
Because you're about to
meet your maker!
1025
01:10:29,440 --> 01:10:30,880
- Just say you're sorry!
- No.
1026
01:10:31,080 --> 01:10:33,920
We had a good time,
and I'm not gonna apologize for that.
1027
01:10:34,080 --> 01:10:35,880
[SCREAMING]
1028
01:10:46,560 --> 01:10:47,840
[LAUGHING]
1029
01:10:50,760 --> 01:10:53,200
Okay, I'm sorry.
1030
01:10:53,400 --> 01:10:55,840
Fine. I'll take Annette.
1031
01:10:58,880 --> 01:11:01,240
That was fun.
1032
01:11:09,280 --> 01:11:11,800
JESSE [OVER RADIO]: Lost Sheep,
Lost Sheep, are you out there?
1033
01:11:11,960 --> 01:11:13,400
LUKE:
Uncle Jesse, where are you?
1034
01:11:13,560 --> 01:11:17,320
There's a hearing at the courthouse.
We gotta get everybody over there now.
1035
01:11:17,480 --> 01:11:19,920
BOSS [OVER RADIO]:
Sounds like a mighty fine plan, Lucas.
1036
01:11:20,080 --> 01:11:22,560
Only got one wrinkle to it.
1037
01:11:22,760 --> 01:11:29,160
You do that, could be very bad
for Jesse and Pauline's health.
1038
01:11:29,440 --> 01:11:31,200
Hogg, you lay one hand on them...
1039
01:11:31,400 --> 01:11:34,400
...and I'll shove a apple in your mouth
and my foot up your ass.
1040
01:11:34,600 --> 01:11:36,240
Well, you bring the Vaseline.
1041
01:11:36,920 --> 01:11:38,600
We'll make it a party.
1042
01:11:38,760 --> 01:11:42,240
You two boys stay out of Hazzard,
and I mean it this time.
1043
01:11:42,440 --> 01:11:45,200
- Where you think they got them?
- I don't know.
1044
01:11:45,400 --> 01:11:48,720
- Hogg's never gone this far before.
- You ready to go that far?
1045
01:11:49,440 --> 01:11:52,960
Cousin, I'm always ready
to go that far.
1046
01:12:06,240 --> 01:12:09,480
What are we doing here?
This is Derek Sheevington's place.
1047
01:12:09,640 --> 01:12:13,960
Yeah. Pretty good chance this is gonna
get ugly, so we're gonna drop you here.
1048
01:12:14,120 --> 01:12:17,120
He got caught drinking
out of the toilet in the girls' bathroom.
1049
01:12:17,280 --> 01:12:20,960
I know, I know. But we're gonna need
you girls to work with him.
1050
01:12:22,000 --> 01:12:23,320
Oh, good God.
1051
01:12:26,160 --> 01:12:28,800
Why, Katie Johnson, is that you?
1052
01:12:28,960 --> 01:12:30,760
Boy, you filled out real nice.
1053
01:12:30,960 --> 01:12:33,760
Yeah. You filled out
real nice too, Sheev.
1054
01:12:33,960 --> 01:12:37,880
What's going on, Sheev? Looks like
we're gonna need some of those toys.
1055
01:12:38,160 --> 01:12:41,920
Leave them two girls here,
I'll give you anything you want.
1056
01:12:42,080 --> 01:12:44,640
Come on in. I'll put a stew on.
1057
01:12:46,880 --> 01:12:48,280
[PHONE RINGING]
1058
01:12:54,240 --> 01:12:58,080
- Hazzard County Police Department.
- Enos, this is Boss Hogg.
1059
01:12:58,240 --> 01:13:00,240
Me and Rosco are over
at the Duke place.
1060
01:13:00,400 --> 01:13:04,240
- If anybody wants us, we'll be here.
ENOS: Well, that's mighty consid...
1061
01:13:06,760 --> 01:13:11,240
Rosco, I'm going over
and join the governor at the rally.
1062
01:13:11,440 --> 01:13:15,240
Do not be late
going to the courthouse.
1063
01:13:15,400 --> 01:13:18,680
Boss, how come you told old Enos there
where we was at?
1064
01:13:22,080 --> 01:13:24,600
You remember the time
we tried to fix the rodeo?
1065
01:13:24,760 --> 01:13:28,480
- Yeah.
- It was Enos that told the Dukes.
1066
01:13:28,920 --> 01:13:32,440
Then we tried to spread those rumors
about the Mad Cow Disease...
1067
01:13:32,600 --> 01:13:36,760
...so my chicken factories
would make a little more profit.
1068
01:13:36,960 --> 01:13:39,440
It was Enos that told the Duke boys.
1069
01:13:39,600 --> 01:13:42,280
So you want them Duke boys
to come out here?
1070
01:14:14,640 --> 01:14:19,800
Enos, where's Boss Hogg and Rosco?
1071
01:14:20,000 --> 01:14:22,440
They're at your farm.
1072
01:14:23,000 --> 01:14:25,120
Thank you, Enos.
1073
01:14:29,840 --> 01:14:32,280
That might be a new record.
1074
01:14:38,160 --> 01:14:40,680
What? Okay, thanks, Daisy.
1075
01:14:42,600 --> 01:14:43,960
He's at our farm.
1076
01:14:46,360 --> 01:14:48,480
Hey. Hey, look, there's Prickett.
1077
01:14:49,200 --> 01:14:51,360
LUKE: So?
- He can help us.
1078
01:14:51,520 --> 01:14:54,360
He don't care about Hazzard.
He's getting paid to be here.
1079
01:14:54,520 --> 01:14:56,800
Oh, man, you're wrong.
He's from here.
1080
01:15:04,120 --> 01:15:07,080
- You out of your goddamn mind?
- Hey, Billy.
1081
01:15:07,240 --> 01:15:11,080
- Boss Hogg's gonna strip-mine Hazzard.
- Just hold your horses.
1082
01:15:11,240 --> 01:15:14,480
- Who's stripping?
- He's playing you, man.
1083
01:15:14,640 --> 01:15:17,240
- He paid you to come and race...
- Just save your breath.
1084
01:15:17,400 --> 01:15:20,240
- I already know.
- You already know?
1085
01:15:21,880 --> 01:15:25,360
- But this is your hometown.
- I hate to break this to you, Bo-Bo...
1086
01:15:25,560 --> 01:15:28,200
...but this place is a shithole.
1087
01:15:28,400 --> 01:15:31,920
If it wasn't a strip mine,
it'd be a strip mall.
1088
01:15:32,120 --> 01:15:33,560
[LAUGHING]
1089
01:15:34,000 --> 01:15:38,480
Kind of like one of them outlets where
everything's reduced prices and...
1090
01:15:38,680 --> 01:15:42,320
Hell, they don't even have an Outback
Steakhouse down here. Am I right?
1091
01:15:42,520 --> 01:15:45,360
- Right as pie, Billy.
BILLY: Saddle up, Dil.
1092
01:15:49,760 --> 01:15:54,080
Look at the bright side, Bo-Bo. At least
you didn't have to race me today.
1093
01:15:54,240 --> 01:15:58,040
Because I would've left that little Tonka
toy you drive at the starting stripe.
1094
01:15:58,240 --> 01:16:00,600
DIL: Tonka.
- I'm gonna kill him.
1095
01:16:00,760 --> 01:16:03,040
Hey, hey, hey!
1096
01:16:03,200 --> 01:16:05,440
- What about Uncle Jesse?
- Wanna ride this stag?
1097
01:16:05,600 --> 01:16:08,960
- You wanna rodeo with this clown?
- Uncle Jesse's old, Luke.
1098
01:16:09,160 --> 01:16:10,800
He's had a good run.
1099
01:16:10,960 --> 01:16:16,600
Besides, if he passes, God have mercy
on his soul, we get the farm.
1100
01:16:19,600 --> 01:16:22,720
I'm just playing with you, man.
Let's go get him.
1101
01:16:34,280 --> 01:16:36,000
They're here.
1102
01:16:38,480 --> 01:16:39,880
[LAUGHING]
1103
01:16:42,720 --> 01:16:43,880
Cooter, you ready out there?
1104
01:16:44,080 --> 01:16:46,040
COOTER [OVER RADIO]:
You get Rosco out of there....
1105
01:16:46,240 --> 01:16:47,800
...Daisy and I'll take
care of the rest.
1106
01:16:47,960 --> 01:16:50,720
What do you say we smoke
the varmint out of his hole?
1107
01:16:51,240 --> 01:16:52,400
[HORN PLAYING "DIXIE"]
1108
01:16:53,480 --> 01:16:56,800
LUKE: Hey, Rosco, come on out,
you fat son of a bitch!
1109
01:16:57,600 --> 01:16:58,840
[LAUGHING]
1110
01:17:03,160 --> 01:17:05,640
- Cletus, get your butt out there.
- Thank you, Rosco.
1111
01:17:19,880 --> 01:17:22,640
- Let me know if you're gonna puke!
- Oh, you'll know first!
1112
01:17:29,800 --> 01:17:33,160
ROSCO: All right, boys! Y'all come on
out of there with your hands up.
1113
01:17:34,960 --> 01:17:37,200
- Hey, Rosco!
- Hi, Boo-Boo.
1114
01:17:48,040 --> 01:17:50,320
I didn't know we had so many pigs
on the farm.
1115
01:17:58,560 --> 01:18:00,320
[GUNSHOTS]
1116
01:18:02,200 --> 01:18:05,360
- I call this "painting the fence."
- I think you missed a spot.
1117
01:18:09,400 --> 01:18:11,360
Look out, look out!
1118
01:18:11,600 --> 01:18:13,920
- You gonna get us out of here?
- I'm working on it!
1119
01:18:18,400 --> 01:18:20,240
[LAUGHING]
1120
01:18:26,120 --> 01:18:27,200
[SIRENS WAILING]
1121
01:18:29,920 --> 01:18:32,040
Man, they're hauling ass, pick it up!
1122
01:18:42,200 --> 01:18:44,440
- You gonna make that?
- I'm planning on it.
1123
01:18:47,480 --> 01:18:49,360
Hold on, Luke.
1124
01:18:51,480 --> 01:18:52,680
BOTH:
Whoa!
1125
01:18:53,080 --> 01:18:54,840
I'll go in this direction now!
1126
01:19:08,640 --> 01:19:11,480
All right, Jesse. I'm arresting those...
1127
01:19:12,000 --> 01:19:15,160
Jesse? Jesse?
1128
01:19:18,240 --> 01:19:20,200
Courthouse.
1129
01:19:28,560 --> 01:19:32,240
SHEEV: Attention!
Attention, good people of Hazzard!
1130
01:19:32,440 --> 01:19:35,320
Life as we know it is about to end.
1131
01:19:35,520 --> 01:19:40,280
As we speak, dark forces are conspiring
to strip-mine our land.
1132
01:19:40,440 --> 01:19:42,800
Follow me to the courthouse,
and we'll save you!
1133
01:19:43,000 --> 01:19:44,520
[CROWD SHOUTING]
1134
01:19:44,680 --> 01:19:48,840
Yeah, right, Sheev. Last year
the CIA was brainwashing our cows.
1135
01:19:49,440 --> 01:19:50,800
Get a job, man.
1136
01:19:51,000 --> 01:19:52,120
[CROWD LAUGHING]
1137
01:19:52,280 --> 01:19:53,960
Hey, Sheev. Sheev.
1138
01:19:54,120 --> 01:19:58,160
- Go back to your spaceship.
- I'm serious. Come on!
1139
01:19:59,320 --> 01:20:00,360
WOMAN:
Bye, Sheev.
1140
01:20:03,120 --> 01:20:04,480
[CROWD BOOING]
1141
01:20:06,680 --> 01:20:08,400
[SIRENS WAILING]
1142
01:20:12,000 --> 01:20:13,640
[GUNSHOTS]
1143
01:20:14,760 --> 01:20:16,680
It might be good
if you helped out here.
1144
01:20:16,840 --> 01:20:19,000
- Hell, move over, I'll drive.
- No way.
1145
01:20:19,200 --> 01:20:21,000
I'm still hoping to survive this thing.
1146
01:20:23,000 --> 01:20:24,680
Goddamn it. Son of a bitch.
1147
01:20:28,000 --> 01:20:30,920
I like the way you think, cuz.
Yeah, boy!
1148
01:20:49,520 --> 01:20:51,040
Hold on.
1149
01:21:05,920 --> 01:21:08,280
Lost Sheep, Lost Sheep,
are you out there?
1150
01:21:08,880 --> 01:21:10,040
Go for Lost Sheep.
1151
01:21:10,240 --> 01:21:12,440
- Free and clear.
LUKE: Good.
1152
01:21:12,640 --> 01:21:15,200
Sheev's making sure everyone
goes to the hearing.
1153
01:21:15,360 --> 01:21:17,080
- I'll see you in town.
LUKE: Over and out.
1154
01:21:17,280 --> 01:21:18,760
Let's get the hell out of here.
1155
01:21:24,040 --> 01:21:27,960
- Barn door, coming up.
- Yeah, I see it. Hold on!
1156
01:21:32,440 --> 01:21:33,760
[CHEERS]
1157
01:21:35,280 --> 01:21:36,840
[SCREAMING]
1158
01:21:50,400 --> 01:21:52,120
The General!
1159
01:21:52,320 --> 01:21:54,000
Let's head to the courthouse!
1160
01:21:58,320 --> 01:22:01,320
SHEEV: End of the World to Lost Sheep,
End of the World to Lost Sheep.
1161
01:22:01,480 --> 01:22:03,440
- Come in, Lost Sheep.
- What do you got?
1162
01:22:03,600 --> 01:22:05,960
- Everybody headed into town?
- That's a negative.
1163
01:22:06,120 --> 01:22:07,600
Repeat, that's a negative.
1164
01:22:07,800 --> 01:22:10,400
No one listened.
They threw hot dogs at us.
1165
01:22:11,200 --> 01:22:14,040
- Did you tell them about the strip mine?
- Of course I did.
1166
01:22:14,640 --> 01:22:17,760
Were you wearing a armadillo helmet
when you told them about it?
1167
01:22:20,080 --> 01:22:21,400
No.
1168
01:22:22,440 --> 01:22:23,920
LUKE:
Okay, Lost Sheep out.
1169
01:22:24,960 --> 01:22:26,600
No one's heading in to town?
1170
01:22:26,760 --> 01:22:30,760
If we don't get to that courthouse
by noon, there ain't gonna be no town.
1171
01:22:31,200 --> 01:22:32,680
[SIRENS WAILING]
1172
01:22:33,640 --> 01:22:37,400
- Well, we still got time for Plan B.
- I like Plan B.
1173
01:22:37,560 --> 01:22:38,840
- Plan B.
- Plan B.
1174
01:22:39,040 --> 01:22:41,400
BALLADEER: When you're
flying by the seat of your pants....
1175
01:22:41,560 --> 01:22:44,520
...nothing sounds more official
than a Plan B.
1176
01:22:46,160 --> 01:22:49,000
BO: Don't worry, cuz,
I'll get them to the courthouse.
1177
01:23:13,040 --> 01:23:16,320
This emergency hearing
is now in session.
1178
01:23:17,840 --> 01:23:20,040
Rosco, where is everybody?
1179
01:23:21,520 --> 01:23:22,880
I'm here.
1180
01:23:23,560 --> 01:23:24,880
Well, we have until noon.
1181
01:24:04,440 --> 01:24:05,760
[CHEERING]
1182
01:24:05,960 --> 01:24:10,280
Now, ladies and gentlemen,
boys and girls...
1183
01:24:10,440 --> 01:24:15,400
...it's my honor today
to introduce my friend...
1184
01:24:15,600 --> 01:24:21,760
...and the friend of everybody in the
greatest state of the United States...
1185
01:24:24,560 --> 01:24:30,080
...the governor, James T. Applewhite!
1186
01:24:30,320 --> 01:24:32,640
Thank you. Thank you.
1187
01:24:33,960 --> 01:24:35,600
APPLEWHITE:
Ladies and gentlemen...
1188
01:24:35,760 --> 01:24:40,760
...welcome to the
70th Annual Hazzard Road Rally!
1189
01:24:43,080 --> 01:24:46,120
Drivers, start your engines!
1190
01:24:48,600 --> 01:24:50,680
[ENGINES REVVING]
1191
01:24:57,280 --> 01:25:01,600
Just have a couple piña coladas
waiting for me at the finish line, Dil.
1192
01:25:01,760 --> 01:25:03,600
Here comes the heat.
1193
01:25:06,320 --> 01:25:07,440
[GUNSHOT]
1194
01:25:07,600 --> 01:25:09,320
MAN 1:
There they go.
1195
01:25:15,200 --> 01:25:17,160
MAN 2:
Come on, come on, come on.
1196
01:25:32,880 --> 01:25:34,200
[CROWD CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]
1197
01:25:34,360 --> 01:25:35,400
[HORN PLAYING "DIXIE"]
1198
01:25:36,520 --> 01:25:37,680
[CROWD CHEERING]
1199
01:25:38,120 --> 01:25:40,040
MAN:
He's in the race!
1200
01:25:44,320 --> 01:25:45,720
Yee-haw!
1201
01:26:11,360 --> 01:26:14,720
It has been confirmed that the
orange car that entered the race...
1202
01:26:14,920 --> 01:26:17,760
...is in fact the same car
that tore up Atlanta this morning.
1203
01:26:17,920 --> 01:26:22,080
It seems that the "orange-car fugitives"
are from right here in Hazzard County.
1204
01:26:22,240 --> 01:26:25,280
State and local authorities
are trying to subdue the vehicle...
1205
01:26:25,440 --> 01:26:27,040
...known as the General Lee.
1206
01:26:27,200 --> 01:26:31,080
Well, General-Lee speaking, I'd say those
cops are in for a pretty tough time.
1207
01:26:31,240 --> 01:26:33,400
I'm Rick Shakely.
Back to you, Marty.
1208
01:26:39,040 --> 01:26:42,240
This is Boss Hogg.
The Dukes are on the course.
1209
01:26:42,400 --> 01:26:44,600
[OVER RADIO] I want all
available vehicles....
1210
01:26:44,760 --> 01:26:48,280
...to shut down the road
to the courthouse!
1211
01:26:48,480 --> 01:26:50,880
- We're gonna need to clear a path.
- You got it.
1212
01:26:54,560 --> 01:26:58,880
Hey, Dil, what's the word
on those Céline Dion tickets?
1213
01:26:59,880 --> 01:27:03,960
Well, of course I wanna go backstage.
Don't be dumb.
1214
01:27:55,000 --> 01:27:56,080
Whoa!
1215
01:27:56,280 --> 01:27:57,440
Damn.
1216
01:28:10,760 --> 01:28:14,840
Enos. I want you
down to the courthouse. I...
1217
01:28:16,400 --> 01:28:17,840
Someone moved my car.
1218
01:28:19,680 --> 01:28:23,640
Enos, you dipstick,
did somebody move my car?
1219
01:28:24,200 --> 01:28:27,360
Hell, let's just sack up
and shoot the bastard.
1220
01:28:28,360 --> 01:28:29,720
[GUNSHOTS]
1221
01:28:29,880 --> 01:28:32,480
Holy shit!
1222
01:28:33,000 --> 01:28:35,040
Luke, where the hell are you?
1223
01:28:36,040 --> 01:28:38,120
LUKE:
Yee-haw!
1224
01:28:40,800 --> 01:28:42,000
[LAUGHING]
1225
01:28:45,840 --> 01:28:48,280
- Yee-haw!
- Whoa!
1226
01:28:50,640 --> 01:28:53,560
- Good God almighty.
- It's about time!
1227
01:28:53,720 --> 01:28:56,560
- How's the race going?
- How's it look like it's going?
1228
01:29:44,480 --> 01:29:45,960
JESSE:
Why, you dirty son of a bitch.
1229
01:29:49,800 --> 01:29:51,560
Hey, go easy on that.
1230
01:29:51,720 --> 01:29:55,720
For what I'm getting ready to do,
I don't wanna remember a lot of it.
1231
01:29:58,240 --> 01:29:59,760
Whoa!
1232
01:30:02,080 --> 01:30:03,880
You know why tornadoes and blonds...
1233
01:30:04,080 --> 01:30:06,080
- ...are so much alike?
- No.
1234
01:30:06,280 --> 01:30:10,920
At first, there's a lot of sucking and
blowing, and then you lose your house.
1235
01:30:16,080 --> 01:30:18,920
Know what you get when you cross
a donkey with an onion?
1236
01:30:19,080 --> 01:30:20,640
- No.
- You get a piece of ass...
1237
01:30:20,800 --> 01:30:23,760
...that'll bring a tear to your eye.
1238
01:30:28,680 --> 01:30:30,240
You thinking about throwing it?
1239
01:30:30,440 --> 01:30:32,640
Oh, I'll throw it.
I was thinking about pussy.
1240
01:30:40,440 --> 01:30:42,520
You know why divorces
are so expensive?
1241
01:30:42,720 --> 01:30:45,280
- No.
- Because they're worth it.
1242
01:30:48,280 --> 01:30:50,320
Fire in the hole.
1243
01:30:56,200 --> 01:30:59,760
Hey, Bo, take it home.
The coast is clear.
1244
01:30:59,960 --> 01:31:01,160
[HONKING HORN]
1245
01:31:11,920 --> 01:31:13,800
DAISY:
Here we go again.
1246
01:31:13,960 --> 01:31:16,120
Okay, I'm gonna get those cops
to follow me.
1247
01:31:16,320 --> 01:31:19,120
When I do, tow those cruisers
out of the way.
1248
01:31:19,320 --> 01:31:21,200
Can do.
1249
01:31:35,240 --> 01:31:38,360
Excuse me, officers.
My car broke down up the street there...
1250
01:31:38,520 --> 01:31:40,840
...and I was wondering
if y'all could help me out.
1251
01:31:41,000 --> 01:31:43,880
Why, yes, ma'am.
We'll be happy to.
1252
01:31:44,080 --> 01:31:47,480
- Oh, you're sweet.
- Let's go.
1253
01:31:48,000 --> 01:31:51,520
Halt! Tough shit, honey.
You go fix your own car.
1254
01:31:51,720 --> 01:31:53,280
Ain't no one going anywhere.
1255
01:31:54,240 --> 01:31:56,360
What the hell are you doing?
1256
01:32:06,640 --> 01:32:08,000
Come on, General.
1257
01:32:39,320 --> 01:32:41,640
Hey, Dil, we got a late arrival!
1258
01:32:51,320 --> 01:32:53,040
Hey, Billy!
1259
01:33:03,040 --> 01:33:05,360
You're gonna pay for that, Bo-Bo.
1260
01:33:09,560 --> 01:33:12,000
I've had just about enough of you.
1261
01:33:23,160 --> 01:33:24,240
[CROWD CHEERING]
1262
01:33:24,440 --> 01:33:25,680
Here they come.
1263
01:33:41,800 --> 01:33:44,320
Of course I can feel him on my left!
Of course I can!
1264
01:33:49,280 --> 01:33:52,440
- Where is he getting this from?
- Hey, Billy!
1265
01:33:52,640 --> 01:33:54,040
He's playing with me!
1266
01:34:01,960 --> 01:34:04,640
- Come on.
- The General Lee has won the race.
1267
01:34:06,240 --> 01:34:07,840
I want him tested for steroids!
1268
01:34:11,640 --> 01:34:14,720
But Billy Prickett and the General Lee
haven't had quite enough driving.
1269
01:34:14,880 --> 01:34:16,800
They're still going.
1270
01:34:18,240 --> 01:34:20,520
MAN: Come on, y'all!
RICK: We'll interview these guys...
1271
01:34:20,680 --> 01:34:23,760
...if we have to chase after
them ourselves. Tito, start the van.
1272
01:34:24,320 --> 01:34:26,240
Better luck next time, Hogg.
1273
01:34:26,400 --> 01:34:27,920
Let's go, baby.
1274
01:34:35,720 --> 01:34:37,720
MAN:
Don't go home, really.
1275
01:34:39,960 --> 01:34:41,920
This is Boss Hogg.
1276
01:34:42,160 --> 01:34:46,960
That road better be shut down
tighter than a tick's ass.
1277
01:34:47,640 --> 01:34:50,160
Ten-four. Barricade's in place.
1278
01:34:56,040 --> 01:34:58,160
Rosco, is anyone coming?
1279
01:34:58,720 --> 01:35:02,800
- What, I ain't good enough for you?
- No comment.
1280
01:35:04,280 --> 01:35:06,840
Don't write that down.
Don't write that down.
1281
01:35:07,080 --> 01:35:10,080
- Are they coming?
- Oh, yeah, they're coming.
1282
01:35:10,240 --> 01:35:12,720
We got the whole town headed
to the courthouse.
1283
01:35:13,960 --> 01:35:17,200
- Daisy, we all clear?
DAISY [OVER RADIO]: Not exactly.
1284
01:35:17,360 --> 01:35:19,960
"Not exactly" could be a problem.
1285
01:35:20,200 --> 01:35:24,320
COOTER [OVER RADIO]: Bo? I think
we're gonna have to shoot the moon.
1286
01:35:39,760 --> 01:35:42,280
- What the hell are you doing, Cooter?
- Sorry, officer.
1287
01:35:42,480 --> 01:35:44,360
I heard a pretty lady needed a tow.
1288
01:35:47,560 --> 01:35:50,480
- Cooter.
- I can't hear you.
1289
01:35:50,640 --> 01:35:53,080
Cooter, what the hell are you doing?
1290
01:36:01,120 --> 01:36:03,480
Hey, Billy!
1291
01:36:03,640 --> 01:36:05,760
You think I was born
yesterday, Bo-Bo?
1292
01:36:07,040 --> 01:36:09,000
Oh, shit!
1293
01:36:17,280 --> 01:36:18,960
Holy shit.
1294
01:36:20,520 --> 01:36:22,480
BO:
Yee-haw!
1295
01:36:35,440 --> 01:36:38,120
Luke, I made it, but I don't know
how anybody else will.
1296
01:36:38,280 --> 01:36:41,160
That's okay, I got an idea!
1297
01:36:45,000 --> 01:36:46,840
Well, I'll see you on the other side.
1298
01:36:47,080 --> 01:36:48,280
Woo-hoo!
1299
01:36:52,840 --> 01:36:54,000
Whoa!
1300
01:36:56,200 --> 01:36:57,800
[HORNS HONKING]
1301
01:37:02,080 --> 01:37:04,160
Give me
your goddamn driver's license.
1302
01:37:04,400 --> 01:37:06,080
What license?
1303
01:37:12,920 --> 01:37:15,560
What are we waiting on, judge?
Let's finish this thing.
1304
01:37:15,720 --> 01:37:17,560
Well, I guess it's that time.
1305
01:37:17,720 --> 01:37:20,680
I just can't believe
that nobody wants to object.
1306
01:37:22,120 --> 01:37:25,840
All those in favor
of the strip-mining ordinance?
1307
01:37:27,600 --> 01:37:29,960
- They're gonna strip-mine Hazzard?
- Damn straight.
1308
01:37:30,120 --> 01:37:34,520
- How can they do that?
- Don't worry, we're about to stop them.
1309
01:37:35,680 --> 01:37:37,720
All those opposed?
1310
01:37:38,000 --> 01:37:39,560
[RATTLING AND
INDISTINCT CHATTERING]
1311
01:37:39,720 --> 01:37:42,320
What the hell is that?
Who locked that door?
1312
01:37:46,760 --> 01:37:49,360
- Oh, man, that's gonna hurt tomorrow.
BO: Your Honor!
1313
01:37:49,560 --> 01:37:54,040
I think we got some people who might
like to object to this strip-mining issue.
1314
01:37:54,480 --> 01:37:57,920
Okay, all those opposed
to the strip-mining ordinance?
1315
01:37:58,240 --> 01:37:59,600
[SHOUTING]
1316
01:38:00,960 --> 01:38:06,720
This court hereby declares that the
strip-mining ordinance is dismissed.
1317
01:38:06,880 --> 01:38:08,360
[CHEERING]
1318
01:38:12,120 --> 01:38:15,240
Thank you much. Thank you, Boss.
Hi, how y'all?
1319
01:38:15,480 --> 01:38:18,200
She might be a little low on gas.
1320
01:38:18,400 --> 01:38:20,360
Take that.
1321
01:38:21,480 --> 01:38:24,880
Were you really gonna strip-mine
Hazzard, Mr. Hogg?
1322
01:38:25,640 --> 01:38:28,240
I was thinking about it.
1323
01:38:29,320 --> 01:38:31,680
OFFICER 1: Out of the way.
OFFICER 2: Step aside, please.
1324
01:38:31,880 --> 01:38:33,160
OFFICER 3:
Excuse me, ma'am.
1325
01:38:34,560 --> 01:38:36,840
OFFICER 1: Get your hands up.
OFFICER 2: People, move back.
1326
01:38:37,000 --> 01:38:38,640
Hands up, hands up.
1327
01:38:38,800 --> 01:38:42,200
Okay. Looks like the party's over.
1328
01:38:42,400 --> 01:38:45,440
Damn right it is.
As long as I'm a county commissioner...
1329
01:38:45,600 --> 01:38:48,480
...for the great state of Georgia,
you two are gonna rot...
1330
01:38:48,640 --> 01:38:50,800
...in the penitentiary. Cuff him.
1331
01:38:50,960 --> 01:38:52,200
[CROWD SHOUTING]
1332
01:38:52,400 --> 01:38:53,680
MAN 1:
Let them go!
1333
01:38:54,000 --> 01:38:55,760
Let them go!
1334
01:38:55,920 --> 01:38:59,280
Excuse me, Rick Shakely. I think
the governor has a statement to make.
1335
01:38:59,480 --> 01:39:01,320
- Well, hot dog.
- I do?
1336
01:39:01,520 --> 01:39:04,000
Yes, sir. You wanted to comment
on how these boys...
1337
01:39:04,160 --> 01:39:06,480
...are the heroes
for saving Hazzard County.
1338
01:39:06,640 --> 01:39:09,640
MAN 1: That's right, governor!
MAN 2: Come on, governor!
1339
01:39:11,040 --> 01:39:13,000
Certainly, certainly.
1340
01:39:13,200 --> 01:39:16,760
As you know, I've always been
a great friend to the environment.
1341
01:39:17,200 --> 01:39:20,160
And these boys,
they're environmental heroes!
1342
01:39:21,920 --> 01:39:26,040
And because they're heroes, you're
gonna pardon them for all their crimes?
1343
01:39:29,240 --> 01:39:32,640
Moreover, as governor,
I hereby pardon these boys...
1344
01:39:32,800 --> 01:39:36,720
...of any and all offenses against
the great state of Georgia. Go Dogs!
1345
01:39:40,000 --> 01:39:43,680
Governor? I wanna thank you
for pardoning me too.
1346
01:39:43,840 --> 01:39:46,920
- Pardon you for what?
- For this.
1347
01:39:51,680 --> 01:39:54,160
Oh, what the hell. I pardon him too.
1348
01:39:56,440 --> 01:40:00,000
Here's to Hazzard County's
real favorite sons.
1349
01:40:03,480 --> 01:40:06,520
BALLADEER:
The day had been saved, as they say.
1350
01:40:06,720 --> 01:40:09,360
Hazzard was put back the way it was.
1351
01:40:09,520 --> 01:40:12,280
Boss Hogg had some explaining to do.
1352
01:40:12,480 --> 01:40:14,960
And the Dukes got their farm back
and celebrated...
1353
01:40:15,120 --> 01:40:18,440
...with a good old-fashioned
pig-picking barbecue.
1354
01:40:18,600 --> 01:40:21,760
Hey, Billy. Daisy, I think
you ought to get up there and sing.
1355
01:40:21,920 --> 01:40:25,600
- Oh, no. I only sing in the shower.
- I'll get the water running.
1356
01:40:25,800 --> 01:40:28,240
- Let's get Uncle Jesse to do it.
- Good idea.
1357
01:40:28,440 --> 01:40:31,760
Pauline, where's Uncle Jesse?
We want him to sing a song.
1358
01:40:31,920 --> 01:40:35,120
I think I might know where he is.
1359
01:40:39,240 --> 01:40:40,480
An apple?
1360
01:40:40,760 --> 01:40:43,640
An apple a day
will keep the doctor away, darling.
1361
01:40:43,800 --> 01:40:46,800
Come on, Jesse,
they want you to sing.
1362
01:40:47,000 --> 01:40:50,760
- Real refreshing.
- They are, aren't they?
1363
01:41:00,720 --> 01:41:02,440
It feels like old times again.
1364
01:41:02,640 --> 01:41:06,320
Yeah, except for now we don't
gotta worry about Bo finding out.
1365
01:41:06,520 --> 01:41:10,000
I swear you're the most beautiful thing
I've ever seen.
1366
01:41:10,160 --> 01:41:12,960
ANNETTE: You're sweet.
- Yeah.
1367
01:41:13,120 --> 01:41:15,320
I would really like to give you
a bath later.
1368
01:41:15,520 --> 01:41:17,680
Clean you up real nice.
Would you like that?
1369
01:41:17,840 --> 01:41:21,080
- I'd like that.
LUKE: Yeah. Yeah.
1370
01:41:21,240 --> 01:41:25,040
[WHISPERS]
Don't worry about her. She's crazy.
1371
01:41:25,560 --> 01:41:26,760
[TAPPING ON WINDOW]
1372
01:41:31,560 --> 01:41:33,080
Hey there, Laurie.
1373
01:41:33,240 --> 01:41:36,320
You forgot to make your delivery
this week, Luke Duke.
1374
01:41:36,840 --> 01:41:39,960
- Go, Bo, go.
- Luke, you man-whore.
1375
01:41:40,680 --> 01:41:43,320
LAURIE:
You get back here, you bastard!
1376
01:41:43,480 --> 01:41:44,920
BALLADEER:
See y'all later.
1377
01:41:45,920 --> 01:41:47,000
[GUNSHOTS]
1378
01:41:47,200 --> 01:41:48,760
[SINGING "GOOD OL' BOYS"]
1379
01:41:59,000 --> 01:42:00,680
MAN:
Okay, this is A-camera marker.
1380
01:42:00,840 --> 01:42:03,960
- Actually, she's my cousin.
- That don't make a difference to me.
1381
01:42:04,120 --> 01:42:08,120
Hell, long as she's your sister.
What the fuck did I just say?
1382
01:42:13,240 --> 01:42:17,040
Don't you know you're not supposed
to wear white after Labor Day?
1383
01:42:20,000 --> 01:42:22,040
MAN: Come on, cut that out.
- Seann.
1384
01:42:22,240 --> 01:42:24,400
Do I need to mark this thing?
1385
01:42:24,600 --> 01:42:26,400
MAN [OVER RADIO]:
It's called common markers.
1386
01:42:26,600 --> 01:42:28,480
I wonder if Richard Burton
ever had to do that.
1387
01:43:10,600 --> 01:43:14,160
What the fuck?
That's the kiss you guys are having?
1388
01:43:14,360 --> 01:43:17,240
What the fuck?
I'm a total fucking moron.
1389
01:43:17,400 --> 01:43:20,040
MAN: It gets longer and longer.
- Come on.
1390
01:43:20,240 --> 01:43:23,760
How these boys are the heroes for...
Oh, my Lord.
1391
01:43:23,920 --> 01:43:26,280
BAKER: Every time I look
at her titties, she loses her line.
1392
01:43:26,440 --> 01:43:28,080
[LAUGHING]
1393
01:43:28,560 --> 01:43:31,080
MAN [OVER RADIO]: I love it
except for the hair in your eyes.
1394
01:43:31,240 --> 01:43:32,800
- I know.
- How's my hair?
1395
01:43:32,960 --> 01:43:34,040
MAN:
Okay.
1396
01:43:34,200 --> 01:43:35,800
How'd you miss that?
1397
01:43:35,960 --> 01:43:38,440
MAN [OVER RADIO]:
Gonna take your hands off the wheel?
1398
01:43:38,600 --> 01:43:39,920
He showed me his balls.
1399
01:43:40,080 --> 01:43:42,880
Sorry. Okay, okay. We'll do it again.
Okay, keep going.
1400
01:43:43,040 --> 01:43:44,960
For your...
1401
01:43:46,880 --> 01:43:49,760
- Don't tell me, it rhymes with "anus."
MAN [WHISPERS]: Heinous.
1402
01:43:49,920 --> 01:43:52,240
For your heinous crimes.
1403
01:43:52,400 --> 01:43:55,400
Have you been running this
around the clock, Uncle Jesse?
1404
01:43:55,760 --> 01:43:57,080
[GIBBERING]
1405
01:44:05,320 --> 01:44:09,240
Did I say "shit" or "hell" that time?
With "ass" or "dick"? I said "hell"?
1406
01:44:10,960 --> 01:44:14,720
SCOTT:
Dang it, a little help. A little help.
1407
01:44:16,000 --> 01:44:18,520
MAN 1: Cut it.
MAN 2: Cut.
1408
01:44:18,720 --> 01:44:23,800
SCOTT: Come on, be a bro, be a bro.
Get it away! Come on. Get it away!
1409
01:44:23,960 --> 01:44:25,640
MAXWELL: Move over.
- Hey.
1410
01:44:25,840 --> 01:44:29,080
- There weren't any bananas.
- Oh, that's okay.
1411
01:44:30,080 --> 01:44:34,000
- Where's Bo?
- To hell with Bo, it's Boo!
1412
01:44:34,160 --> 01:44:35,640
Lunch!
1413
01:44:40,960 --> 01:44:42,720
Thank you very much.
1414
01:44:44,560 --> 01:44:47,680
Look at me, I'm flying. I'm flying!
1415
01:44:47,840 --> 01:44:51,280
Oh, it's so much fun. I'm okay.
1416
01:46:53,120 --> 01:46:55,080
[ENGLISH SDH]