♪ OH OH OH ♪ ♪ TODAY'S THE DAY I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR ♪
♪ TOMORROW WON'T COME AFTER
ALL ♪
♪ YESTERDAY IS SO FAR AWAY ♪
♪ AND TODAY IS THE ONLY DAY ♪
♪ SOMEBODY PLEASE STOP THE
CLOCK ♪
>> Announcer: HERE HE IS NOW,
LIVE FROM HIS GARAGE, ELLEN'S
GUEST HOST, HOWIE MANDEL!
♪ ♪
♪ OH OH OH ♪
♪ DON'T EVER LET THIS DAY STOP ♪
♪ OH OH OH ♪
♪ I NEVER WANNA GO HOME ♪
♪ NO NO NO NO NO ♪
♪ I USED TO WANT TO GROW UP ♪
♪ I THOUGHT THAT I COULD BE
FREE ♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> Howie: THIS IS GREAT.
I WANT TO THANK THE PEOPLE AT
"ELLEN" WHO WERE NICE ENOUGH TO
ACCOMMODATE ME IN.
I'M A SENIOR CITIZEN IN THE
MIDDLE OF THE PANDEMIC.
AND THEY BROUGHT ALL OF THIS TO
ME.
AND SO MY HOUSE, MY GARAGE, MY
DRIVEWAY.
USE TO BEING ON THE ROAD, NOT
JUST THE DRIVEWAY.
BUT YOU ARE HOME TOO.
I AM HOME.
ELLEN IS IN ONE OF HER HOMES.
I KNOW THAT IF THERE ARE FIVE
HOMES, YOU GET A HOTEL, RIGHT?
AND IN THIS HOUSE --
>> HOWIE!
>> Howie: NOT NOW, HONEY.
SHE DOES NOT KNOW THAT WE ARE
DOING THIS.
THAT'S MY WIFE OF 40 YEARS!
I'M HOLDING FOR APPLAUSE.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
PEOPLE ALWAYS SAY TO ME, HOWIE,
40 YEARS TO THE SAME WOMAN?
I HAVE TO BE HONEST WITH YOU,
WHEN I MET HER 40 YEARS AGO SHE
LOVED TO PARTY AND DO THINGS AND
WAS HAPPY AND GIDDY AND THIS IS
NOT THE SAME WOMAN.
[LAUGHTER]
BUT EVERYTHING IS GREAT.
YOU KNOW WHAT WE DO, WE ARE
TRYING TO FIND WAYS TO HAVE FUN.
WE HAVE BEEN BINGE WATCHING LIKE
EVERYBODY IN THE WORLD, WE HAVE
BEEN BENCH WATCHING.
AND WE JUST FINISHED WATCHING --
OH, NETFLIX.
[LAUGHTER]
WE JUST FINISHED THAT AND WE ARE
MOVING ONTO HULU AND --
BUT WE HAVE GONE THROUGH
ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING THAT YOU
GUYS HAVE AND NOW WE ARE INTO
THE LOWER PART OF THE LIST.
A LOT OF --
I LOVE HORROR.
I SHOULD SHOW SOME OF THE THINGS
THAT WE HAVE BEEN WATCHING.
THIS IS ONE HORROR THAT IS
BASED --
THIS IS A TRUE STORY.
IT'S BASED IN REALITY AND THAT
MAKES IT EVEN MORE SCARY.
THE NAME OF THIS PICTURE IS
CALLED "BIRDEMIC."
WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING?
>> HERE THEY COME!
[BIRD NOISES]
[LAUGHTER]
[BIRD NOISES] [APPLAUSE] [LAUGHTER]
>> Howie: TERRIFYING.
THAT WAS TERRIFYING.
OH, MY GOSH.
I'M GOING TO HAVE NIGHTMARES.
PEOPLE WHO WATCH THE MOVIE I
RECOMMEND TO OTHER PEOPLE AND
THEY COULD NOT BELIEVE.
THEY SAID THAT DOES NOT LOOK
REAL, AND I ASSURE YOU THAT IS A
REAL MOTEL.
AND NOW I HAVE A FEAR OF
ORIGAMI.
ANYWAY, ANOTHER FILM WE WATCHED,
AND LIKE THE PANDEMIC ISN'T BAD
ENOUGH, THERE IS A MOVIE CALLED
"LLAMAGEDDON."
DON'T WATCH THIS.
THERE WAS NO CLIP THERE.
I JUST WANTED TO THROW TO
SOMETHING AND MAKE IT SEEM LIKE
IT'S A BIGGER --
IT'S BECAUSE MY WIFE IS IN THE
HOUSE RUNNING THE VCR.
YOU MISSED THAT CLIP.
HONEY, I AM GOING TO SHOW
ANOTHER CLIP.
LET'S SHOW THE PEOPLE A CLIP
FROM "KILLER SOFA!"
HONEY, PRESS PLAY!
♪ ♪
[LAUGHTER]
[APPLAUSE]
>> Howie: OH, WHOA, THAT IS
AVAILABLE ON TUBIE AND
AMAZON PRIME.
THAT WAS REALLY SCARY WHEN THE
CHAIR COMES TO HER.
A SPOILER ALERT, IF YOU DON'T
WANT TO HEAR AND YOU ARE GOING
TO WATCH IT.
HE CHOPS HER INTO LITTLE
SECTIONALS.
YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE.
[LAUGHTER]
FURNITURE STUFF?
ANYWAYS, MINE WON'T DO IT,
BECAUSE MINE IS SUCH A LAZY BOY.
[LAUGHTER]
I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.
WHICH, YOU DO SOMETHING MORE
ENTERTAINING.
TWITCH, DO WHAT YOU DO.
♪ ♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪ >> THANK YOU
♪ ♪ [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] >> Howie: THAT WAS GREAT, MAN!
I ENVY YOU.
I WISH I COULD MOVE LIKE THAT.
I WISH I COULD, I CAN'T.
I DO --
YOU HAVE FAITH IN ME?
IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH
DANCING.
I HAVE FAITH IN YOU.
THANKS FOR BEING HERE AND
SUPPORTING ME.
WE ARE IN A WEIRD PLACE RIGHT
NOW, AND THIS IS A SEGMENTED
THAT I WANT TO SHOW YOU, HOW, IS
THAT THE NAME OF THE SEGMENT?
"HOWIE --
OH, THEY ARE USING MY NAME.
LET'S BRING THE CARD UP.
THIS IS THE SEGMENT.
WE ARE DOING ARTS AND CRAFTS ALL
NIGHT LAST NIGHT.
"HOWIE GOT HERE."
YOU SEE, THAT'S GOOD.
THAT WAS A DIFFERENT SEGMENT.
I AM SO CONFUSED.
THIS IS WHAT I WANT TO SHOW YOU.
HOWIE GOT HERE.
SHOW THE FIRST CLIP.
WHAT IS THIS?
♪ ♪
[SCREAMS]
OH, OH.
I'VE NEVER SEEN THAT THAT IS
DISGUSTING!
THAT IS DISGUSTING.
THAT IS SOUP?
WAS THAT SOUP?
SUPER-SPREADER.
DR. MACK THAT IS DISGUSTING.
WHY WOULD YOU JUST STAND THERE
AND VIDEOTAPE THAT?
WHY WOULD YOU NOT SAY, TAKE THAT
LADLE HOME RIGHT NOW!
THAT KILLED ME.
I VOMITED A LITTLE BIT.
ANYWAY, WATCH THIS ONE.
HERE IS ANOTHER ONE.
♪ ♪
[LAUGHTER]
NO, OH, MY GOD.
THAT'S LARRY AND THE.
I KNOW IT'S CUTE AND PEOPLE LOVE
THEIR PETS AND THEY DON'T MIND
WHEN THEY LICK THEIR FACE.
AND THAT IS THE LADLE.
THAT DOG IS GOING TO GET POTENT.
YOU HAVE TO LOVE YOUR PETS.
AND I HAVE ONE MORE FOR YOU, OR
MY WIFE DOES.
PRESS PLAY.
♪ ♪
WOW. YOU ALWAYS EAT IN THE CENTER LANE AND LEAVE THE CHOCOLATE
COOKIE FOR THE PASSING LANE.
NO?
WHAT ABOUT FOR MORNING, JUST
PAST THE TRAFFIC JAM.
I WANT TO END ON A BIG LAUGH
BEFORE WE GO TO COMMERCIAL, SO
THIS IS A REQUEST TO THE
AUDIENCE.
CAN YOU JUST GIVE ME A BIG
LAUGH?
[LAUGHTER]
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT.
THANKS, WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK
WITH MARTHA STEWART AFTER THIS.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> NOTICE HOW SOMETIMES SHE WILL
LOOK VAGUE.
>> Howie: NO, NO, NOT NOW.
ANYWAY, WE WILL
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ >> Howie: WELCOME BACK,
HOWIE MANDEL HERE.
AND NOW I AM IN MY KITCHEN.
I'M VERY EXCITED ABOUT MY NEXT
GUEST.
I HAVE NOT BEEN LUCKY, I HAVE A
DOG NAME LOLA, AND THIS IS A PET
PSYCHIC.
LOLA HAS A PROBLEM WITH ME.
MY WIFE HAS HIRED TRAINER.
AND TEN RULES AND TRAINING, ONLY
NINE FINGERS.
AND WITH THE RULES FOR ANIMAL
TRAINING, NOT AS MANY FINGERS AS
HE HAS RULES, YOU HAVE TO WORRY.
I'M GOING TO INTRODUCE YOU TO MY
DOG FIRST AND I WILL SHOW YOU,
THIS IS LOLA.
SIT.
THAT'S LOLA, AND LET'S FIND OUT
WHAT'S GOING ON INSIDE OF LOLA'S
MIND.
THIS IS PET PSYCHIC
LAURA STINCHFIELD.
>> IT SO WONDERFUL TO MEET YOU.
>> Howie: IT'S GREAT TO MEET
YOU.
I AM SO EXCITED TO FIND OUT WHAT
LOLA IS THINKING AND JUST
AGITATED WITH MY EXISTENT.
>> I AM BEING SERIOUS.
THEY HAVE CALMING SIGNALS, THAT
HIS BODY LANGUAGE THAT ANIMALS
CALM THEMSELVES, COMMUNICATE
WITH OTHER ANIMALS, AND
SOMETIMES USE THESE BODY
LANGUAGE SIGNALS TO COMMUNICATE
WITH PEOPLE AS WELL.
WELL SOCIALIZED DOGS ARE GOING
TO BE USING THESE HOMING SIGNALS
ALL THE TIME.
NOW SOME PEOPLE ARE LICKING
THEIR OWN MOUTH.
YAWNING, SITTING DOWN, LYING
DOWN.
BLINKING HER EYES, LICKING AND
LOOKING AWAY, TURNING AWAY.
NOTICE, AND I WANT YOU TO WATCH
HER, LOOKING AWAY, AND LOOK AT
HER THINKING.
>> Howie: I'M SORRY, I'M
SWEATING NOW.
I SAW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING.
A LOT MORE CALMING THAN IT HAS
USUALLY BEEN.
>> ONE OF THE THINGS I WANT YOU
TO DO WHEN YOU SEE HER, DO A
LICKING OF THE MOUTH.
SHE ACTUALLY DID DO IT BEFORE.
>> Howie: LICKING OF MY MOUTH?
I COME TO THE DOG.
I WILL GO TO THE DOG.
LIKE THAT?
I'M COMING TO THE DOG.
LOOK.
>> MAYBE LATER OFF-CAMERA YOU
CAN DO IT JUST VERY GENTLY.
YOU KNOW HOW YOU HAVE TO HAVE A
REALLY INTENSE ENERGY NOW AND I
KNOW YOU ARE BEING FUNNY, BUT I
AM BEING SERIOUS.
SO WHEN YOU ARE WITH LOLA, I
WANT YOU TO COMMENT DOWN.
AND TRY AND BE MORE CENTERED AND
A LITTLE BIT MORE GROUNDED, KIND
OF THAT FEELING WHEN HE FIRST
WAKE UP AND YOU ARE GETTING
READY AND OUT OF BED.
REALLY JUST CHILLING IT OUT A
LITTLE BIT.
YEAH, GOOD.
IF YOU CAN TONE IT DOWN A LITTLE
BIT, AND KIND OF TAKE THE JOKE
AWAY, OR YOU CAN JOKE, BUT DO IT
MORE --
DON'T KIND OF STARE AT HER,
DIVERGE TO YOUR EYES SO LOOK AT
HER AND LOOK AWAY.
I MEAN, IT'S WHO YOU ARE.
SO YOU CAN BE WHO YOU ARE, JUST
TONE IT DOWN A LOT AND LOOK AT
HER AND THEN LOOK AWAY.
>> Howie: THAT'S GOOD.
THAT'S MUCH BETTER.
>> I CAN'T SEE HER.
>> Howie: YOU CAN'T SEE HER?
>> NOW I CAN SEE HER.
I WANT YOU TO BREATHE.
>> Ellen: YOU WANT ME TO WHAT?
>> BREATHE.
>> Howie: I AM BREATHING.
>> INTO THE HEART.
SO NOW THAT WOULD HAVE STARTED.
IF SHE WAS LOOKING AT YOU AND
SHE IS TRYING REALLY HARD, THAT
KIND OF FAST MOVEMENT IS AND
COULD HAVE SET HER OFF.
SEE HOW SHE IS TRYING REALLY
HARD BY TURNING AWAY.
LOLA, YOU'RE BEING SUCH A GOOD
GIRL.
I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.
>> Howie: WHAT ABOUT ME?
>> YOUR DADDY IS TRYING.
I CAN TELL HE IS TRYING.
HE WILL GET IT.
I PROMISE YOU, LOLA.
I SPOKE EARLIER AND SHE REALLY
WANTS TO BE YOUR FRIEND.
SHE SAYS SOMETIMES YOU SING TO
HER.
IS THAT TRUE?
>> Howie: I DON'T KNOW.
I WILL DO IT NOW HERE IT IS THAT
SOMETHING SHE LIKES?
I DON'T SING.
BUT I WILL IF THAT'S WHAT YOU
THINK THE ISSUE IS.
>> I DON'T THINK THAT'S THE
ISSUE, I THINK GOOD GIRL, LOLA.
I THINK THE ISSUE IS TWO THINGS.
ONE BODY LANGUAGE IS TOO INTENSE
IN HER DIRECTION.
WHEN YOU ARE JOKING IT'S TOO
INTENSE IN HER DIRECTION.
IF YOU SLOW IT DOWN AND JUST BE
YOU AND LEAD WITH YOUR HEART AND
NOT FAST MOVEMENT TOWARDS HER,
IT WILL BE A LOT BETTER.
>> Howie: I THINK I AM HERE
AND WE ARE TOGETHER AND SHE IS
NOT ATTACKING.
>> WHAT I LIKE ABOUT THIS IS
THAT YOUR BACK IS TOWARDS HER --
>> Howie: I LIKE THAT.
IT'S SO GREAT.
>> LOLA, YOU'RE SUCH A GOOD
GIRL.
>> Howie: I HAVE BEEN WITH HER
A LONG TIME.
THANK YOU, LAURA, YOU HAVE BEEN
GREAT.
WE WILL BE BACK RIGHT AFTER
THIS.
>> GOOD GIRL, LOLA.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> LOOK AT MY WELL BEHAVED DOG
JUST WAITING TO TALK TO
HOWIE MANDEL.
>> Howie: YOU ARE IN YOUR
SERVERY.
>> YOU ARE NOT REALLY GOOD, ARE
YOU?
WE NEED SECUR
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ >> Howie: OUR FIRST GUEST HAS
A TIP FOR JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING.
LET'S ASK HER HOW I'M DOING.
PLEASE WELCOME THE ONE AND ONLY
MARTHA STEWART!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> HI, HOWIE.
NICE TO SEE YOU OVER RESUME.
>> Howie: WE HAVE MET BEFORE.
I DID A SHOW WITH YOU, BUT YEARS
AGO, I HAD HAIR AND LOOK
DIFFERENT THEN.
I HAVE YOUR WELLNESS.
>> I HEAR YOU HAVE A TROUBLED
DOG.
WE ARE IN MY SERVERY RIGHT NOW.
AND LOOK WHO IS HERE, ONE OF MY
VERY WELL BEHAVED DOGS IS
WAITING TO TALK TO HOWIE MANDEL.
>> Howie: WHAT IS A SERVERY.
>> IT'S A ROOM IN A OLD HOUSE
WHERE YOU DO THE SERVING FROM.
AND WE HAVE A DINING ROOM OVER
THERE AND THE DINING ROOM OVER
THERE.
IN THE FOOD CAN BE PUT OUT AND
SERVED TO GUEST.
YOU CAN MAKE DRINKS HERE AND
SERVE IN A LIVING ROOM.
IN THE PARLOR.
>> Howie: THIS IS MY DRIVERY.
AND WHEN GUESTS COME THEY CAN GO
AND GET SNACKS OVER HERE IF THEY
WANT DOG TREATS.
WE ARE THE SAME.
SO TELL ME, I'VE BEEN WATCHING
YOU ON INSTAGRAM.
AND YOU HAVE BEEN DOING THINGS
FROM HEAVY MACHINERY.
>> I LOVE TO DRIVE TRACTORS.
I WAS JUST SNOWPLOWING WE HAD A
LOT OF SNOW AT THE FARM.
LOOK AT THAT PHOTO, THAT IS A
360 MOWER.
AND THERE'S A LITTLE --
HILARIOUS.
THAT'S A SNOWPLOW.
>> Ellen: YOU WOULD THINK WITH
THE YOUNG LADY WHO HAS HER OWN
SERVERY.
WOULD HAVE PEOPLE THAT DO THAT.
>> I DO.
>> Howie: YOU LEARNED WHAT
THIRST TRAP WAS.
I SAW YOU WITH THE HOTTEST
PICTURE EVER.
>> I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT
MEANS NOW.
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
>> Howie: OH, PACHA.
YOU ARE A THIRST TRAP.
I CANNOT STOP LOOKING AT THE
PICTURE.
>> DOES IT MEAN YOU ARE THIRSTY?
>> Howie: PEOPLE THIRST FOR
THE PICTURE.
DID YOU GET ANY SUITORS?
>> I GOT SO MANY PROPOSALS AND
PROPOSITIONS.
BUT I HAD TO IGNORE ALL OF THEM.
I AM A VERY BUSY PERSON.
>> Howie: ARE YOU ON FANS ONL
ONLY?
NO.
NO, HOW IS SNOOP DOGG DOING?
YOUR FRIEND SNOOP DOGG?
>> HE IS SO GREAT, HE HOSTED THE
PUPPY BOWL THIS YEAR, THE TWO OF
US.
AND WE ARE DOING STUFF TOGETHER,
WE DO PROJECTS EVERY NOW AND
THEN AND SO FUN TO WORK WITH.
I LOVE GOING OUT TO A STUDIO IN
L.A.
>> Howie: I'M GOING TO
EXPLAIN, I AM HOLDING THE BAG
IT, BECAUSE I AM IN MY DRIVEWAY.
I DON'T HAVE A SERVERY OR TABLES
OR FURNITURE YET.
BUT TELL ME WHAT THIS IS.
BECAUSE I GAVE IT TO MY DOG AND
IT'S AMAZING.
>> WHICH ONE DID YOU GIVE TO
YOUR DOG.
>> Howie: CALMNESS, AND THE
DOG HAS BEEN LEAPING FOR A FEW
DAYS NOW AND IT'S JUST AMAZING.
>> THESE ARE MY NEW CBD TREATS
FOR DOGS.
THEY ARE SOFT SHOES AND THEY
LOOK LIKE THIS.
THIS IS 32 MILLIGRAMS OF CBD.
THIS ONE HAS 7 MILLIGRAMS OF
CBD.
SHE WANTS ONE.
DO YOU WANT ONE.
GOING TO EAT ONE RIGHT IN FRONT
OF US.
>> Howie: IT'S A GREAT PRODUCT
AND THERE IS A SWEET AFTERTASTE.
BUT I WILL TALK ABOUT THAT
DURING THE COMMERCIAL.
WHEN WE COME BACK, MARTHA, CAN
YOU TEACH ME HOW TO MAKE
SOMETHING?
>> I SURE CAN.
>> Howie: WE WILL BE RIGHT
BACK.
YOU DID NOT TELL ME THESE WERE
DOG TREATS.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> Howie: NO, NO, NOT NOW.
THIS WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN.
NOT NOW.
ANYWAY, WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK.
NO.
SORRY.
WHAT IS THAT?
>> A SMALL WORLD FROM ITS A
SMALL WORLD.
>> Howie: WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ >> Howie: WE ARE BACK WITH THE
AMAZING MARTHA STEWART.
YOU ARE TRULY AMAZING.
I DID NOT SAY IT LAST SEGMENT,
BUT I CAN DO NOTHING.
YOU COOK, YOU ARE AN AMAZING
BUSINESSPERSON.
EVERYTHING YOU DO IS YOU ARE
LIKE A SUPERHERO.
AND I'M AMAZED AT HOW MANY
DIFFERENT THINGS YOU HAVE THE
ABILITY TO DO.
FIRST OF ALL, WHAT GOT YOU IN?
HOW DID YOU DEVELOP THE CBD?
>> I LOVE GOOD FLAVOR.
AND I LEARNED ABOUT CBD.
AND I TESTED ALL THE GUMMY IS IN
THE WORLD AND THEY ARE ALL LIKE
GUMMY BEARS.
CHEWY AND BIG AND CLUMSY AND I
WANTED THEM TO BE DELICIOUS.
SO I MADE THESE FANTASTIC
AMINES.
LOOK AT THESE.
THEY ARE 15 DIFFERENT FLAVORS OF
FRUITS LIKE MEYER LEMONS AND
PERSIAN LIMES AND BLACK
RASPBERRIES AND RED RASPBERRIES
AND STRAWBERRIES.
THEY ARE VERY GOOD.
>> Howie: I AM LOOKING AT YOUR
BOOK.
VERY GOOD THINGS.
THIS IS YOUR 90TH BOOK?
>> IT IS.
I HAD TO WRITE MORE BOOKS THAN
THE NUMBER OF YEARS I HAVE
LIVED.
YOU KNOW THAT.
>> Howie: I'M HALFWAY THROUGH
MY FIRST PAMPHLET.
>> IT IS REALLY FULL OF WHAT I
CALL GOOD THINGS SPREAD WHEN
SOMETHING MAKES SENSE AND YOU
ACCOMPLISH A TASK OR A JOB OR
JUST AN IDEA, I CALL IT A GOOD
THING.
AND YOU ARE A GOOD THING, HOWIE.
YOU ARE HELPING ELLEN.
>> Howie: YOU ARE A BETTER
THING.
>> WELL, WE CAN ARGUE ABOUT
THAT.
>> Howie: IN MY GARAGE, WHICH
IS JUST 30 FEET FROM THE SERV
SERVERY.
>> I LOVE TO SOLVE PROBLEMS THAT
EXIST AND HOW TO MAKE A FLOWER
ARRANGEMENT.
I KNOW THAT YOU STRUGGLE WHEN
YOU TO GIVE FLOWERS TO YOUR
LOVED ONE, YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO
ARRANGE THEM.
IF YOU HAVE A VASE AND SOME
FLOWERS?
>> Howie: I DO HAVE A VASE AND
SOME FLOWERS, WHAT DO I DO?
TELL ME WHAT TO DO.
THIS IS MY VASE.
DO YOU HAVE A VASE?
>> I HAVE IT RIGHT HERE.
LOOK AT THIS VASE I HAVE.
IT'S LIKE A SAMPLER VASE.
YOU CAN PUT ALL DIFFERENT KINDS
OF FLOWERS OR COLORS IN ONE
VASE, AND IT MAKES SUCH A
BEAUTIFUL APPEARANCE ON THE
TABLE.
DO YOU HAVE A TULIP?
>> Howie: WHERE DO YOU WANT ME
TO PUT YOUR TWO LIPS?
>> TAKE ONE TULIP.
THAT'S KIND OF ODD TO SAY ONE TO
LET.
SO TAKE ONE --
>> Howie: HOW DO YOU TAKE ONE?
>> YOU HAVE TO UNWRAP THEY GOT
YOU A BUNCH OF TULIPS.
>> Howie: I GOT ONE.
>> JUST TAKE ALL OF THE OUTER
LEAVES OFF VERY CAREFULLY.
YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR LEAVES IN
YOUR ARRANGEMENT AND CUT THEM TO
THE APPROPRIATE LENGTH.
AND A FRESH CUT --
>> Howie: WHAT IS THE
APPROPRIATE LENGTH?
I WANT TO HEAR FROM
MARTHA STEWART, WHAT IS THE
APPROPRIATE LENGTH?
>> AS LONG AS IT FILLS THE VASE
FROM TOP TO BOTTOM, THAT'S THE
APPROPRIATE LENGTH.
YOU SEE?
IT'S GOING BEAUTIFUL.
>> AND DON'T FORGET TO PUT INTO
THE WATER A LITTLE BIT OF FLOUR
FOOD.
THIS COMES OFF TEN TIMES WITH
FROM THE FOREST.
YOU PUT A LITTLE BIT IN THERE,
IT'S FLOUR FOOD.
YOU CAN ALSO WHEN YOU --
YOU CAN USE THE BRUSH.
WHERE'S YOUR BASE?
>> Howie: IS THIS NOT A VASE?
>> IT IS A VAH-SE OR A VAY-SE.
>> Howie: I CUT THE TIP OFF,
IT BROUGHT ME BACK TO MY
CHILDHOOD?
>> ARE YOU JEWISH?
YOU ARE BEHAVING
INAPPROPRIATELY.
WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE THINKING
ABOUT FLOWERS.
>> Ellen: I AM, I GOT FLOWERS.
>> THIS LOOKS SO MUCH LIKE THE
COLORS IN MY CBD BOX.
DO YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND OR
WIFE, WHAT DO YOU HAVE?
>> Howie: I AM JEWISH AND I
HAVE A WIFE IN THE HOUSE.
AT THE SAME WIFE FOR 40 YEARS.
WAIT TILL SHE SEES WHAT I MADE
FOR HER.
SHE WILL GO CRAZY.
ANYWAYS, MARTHA, YOU ARE
AMAZING.
SHE IS EATING YOUR CBD RIGHT N
NOW.
GO GET THE DOG TREATS, BUY THE
BOOK AND MARTHA, KEEP INSPIRING
US.
YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL LADY INSIDE
AND OUT.
WHEN WE COME BACK, I HAVE MY
FRIEND JOHN STAMOS WHO WILL BE
HERE.
NO, NO.
NOT THAT ONE.
THIS WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN.
ANYWAY, WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK --
NO, OH, MY GOD.
THE STORY WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK
WITH JOHN STAMOS.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> ARE YOU SECURITY?
YOU'RE NOT REALLY GOOD, ARE YOU?
[LAUGHTER]
BECAUSE I AM IN YOUR DRESSING
ROOM, AND YOU'RE NOT.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> Howie: WELCOME BACK.
LISTEN, EVERYONE.
IF YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME,
YOU KNOW THAT I'M A HUGE FAN OF
MYSELF.
I'M AMAZING.
I GO TO JUST ABOUT EVERY SHOW I
DO.
[LAUGHTER]
I THOUGHT IF I AM GOING TO HOST,
IT'S IMPORTANT FOR YOU TO SEE
HOW AMAZING I AM.
AND I DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING.
I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING
I DID ON THE SHOW A FEW YEARS
BACK THAT I THOUGHT, OH, MY GOD,
HOWIE.
YOU ARE WONDERFUL.
THIS IS ME AT THE iHEARTRADIO
SHOW.
WATCH THIS.
SECURITY.
>> HOW ARE YOU DOING?
>> Howie: I'M WITH THE "ELLEN"
SHOW.
WHAT'S NOT ALLOWED?
THIS PAST?
THIS IS NOT ALLOWED IN THIS AR
AREA?
[LAUGHTER]
DEMI LOVATO IN THERE?
IT SAYS DEMI LOVATO.
DEMI!
OH, SHE'S NOT HERE!
>> NOT YET.
>> Howie: WHO ELSE?
RYAN!
DEMI LOVATO'S DRESSING ROOM.
WHO ORDERS THIS INTO A DRESSING
ROOM?
WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS, HOW DO
YOU GET THIS?
IS SAM IN THERE?
>> HE IS, YEAH.
>> Howie: SAM!
>> IS HE SLEEPING?
>> Howie: SAM!
HOWIE MANDEL WITH "ELLEN," THEY
SAID YOU WERE SLEEPING.
>> HELLO, ELLEN, BY THE WAY.
I LOVE HER SO MUCH.
>> Howie: SHE LOVES YOU.
IF YOU CAN WAIT A MINUTE, WE
WILL DO A TOUR OF YOUR DRESSING
ROOM.
I DON'T WANT YOU IN THIS.
CAN WE SEE HIS DRESSING ROOM?
COME IN.
COME HERE.
WOW.
>> I WAS LIKE WHAT THE [BLEEP].
>> Howie: ARE YOU SECURITY?
YOU'RE NOT REALLY GOOD, ARE YOU?
[LAUGHTER]
BECAUSE I'M IN YOUR DRESSING
ROOM, AND YOU WERE NOT.
>> OH, MY GOD.
BYE, ELLEN!
>> Howie: I THINK CELEBRITIES
WILL ENJOY ME, BUT I THINK --
DEMI LOVATO.
I CAN'T, THEY SAID THAT I CAN'T
PULL HER.
I'M NOT PULLING HER.
I'M NOT ALLOWED TO TALK TO YOU!
>> WE ARE TALKING RIGHT NOW,
WHAT'S GOING ON?
>> Howie: I AM HOWIE MANDEL
WITH ELLEN.
>> YOU ARE MY DRESSING ROOM,
THAT'S WHAT I HEARD.
>> Howie: I HAVE BEEN IN
EVERYBODY'S DRESSING ROOM,
SORRY.
KANYE, TELL YEEZY, JEWWY IS
HERE.
KENNY, KENNY CHESNEY.
HEY, CEE LO GREEN.
LOVE IT.
I WAS NOT CEE LO GREEN.
>> SO MUCH LOVE, I'M
DISAPPOINTED YOU ARE NOT HERE,
BUT I KNOW YOU ARE HERE IN
SPIRIT.
>> Ellen: YOU'RE DISAPPOINTED
SHE SENT ME.
YOU DON'T SAY THAT WHEN I AM IN
THE ROOM.
JARED!
WHY ARE YOU WEARING EARPLUGS?
I JUST WANT TO TALK TO YOU FOR A
COUPLE OF MINUTES.
HE IS WEARING EARPLUGS BECAUSE
HE JUST CAME OUT OF THE CONCERT!
>> I LOVE YOU, ELLEN.
I MISS YOU AND I HOPE I SEE YOU
SOON.
>> Howie: CHRIS, HOWIE MANDEL
WITH "ELLEN."
SHE SENT ME UP STAGE.
>> IS "ELLEN"?
WHAT IS THIS MACHINE?
I WISH I BRUSHED MY HAIR.
>> Howie: ME TOO.
DO YOU WANT TO SIT DOWN FOR JUST
A MINUTE?
>> HOW DO YOU DO THIS?
WHAT?
>> Howie: I KNOW THAT YOU WILL
BE PERFORMING IN A MOMENT, SO WE
HAVE TIME.
>> IF IT IS FOR ELLEN, I WILL DO
IT.
SHE GETS ME TO DO EVERYTHING.
>> Ellen: ANY QUESTION.
>> HOW DO YOU GET AROUND WHEN
YOU DON'T HAVE
"AMERICA'S GOT TALENT," I CANNOT
DO IT.
>> Howie: I DON'T WANT TO --
ANYBODY'S HOPES AND DREAMS, SO
WHAT I DO IS I LIVE.
>> THIS IS NOT THE INTERVIEW I
EXPECTED TO ENDORSE.
>> Howie: ANY KIND OF LYING IS
GOOD.
ARE YOU HAVING THE TIME OF YOUR
LIFE IN THIS INTERVIEW?
LIE.
>> I'M HAVING A LOT OF GOOD
TIMES AND THIS IS THE BEST OF
THEM.
THIS IS THE BEST EXISTENCE AND I
AM HAPPIEST RIGHT NOW.
IS THIS ILLEGAL?
>> Howie: YOUR FLIRTING WITH
ME, BE HONEST, AM I SUNNY
LOOKING?
>> YES.
>> Howie: WHAT IS MY BEST
FEATURE?
>> I WOULD SAY YOUR CHEEKBONES.
>> Howie: YOU ARE A GORGEOUS,
STUNNING, LYING MAN.
[APPLAUSE]
I LOVE ME!
WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE
AFTER THIS.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
WHAT IS THAT?
>> IT'S FROM A SMALL WORLD.
IT'S A SMALL WORLD.
>> Howie: WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED
TO TAKE IT.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> Howie: I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF
DOING A SHOW.
OH!
MY NEXT GUEST IS STIRRING ON HIT
TV SHOWS FOR MORE THAN 35 YEARS.
AND SOMEHOW HE HAS NOT AGED A
DAY.
SO I'M PRETTY SURE HE IS PART
VAMPIRE.
NEXT MONTH YOU CAN CATCH HIM ON
DISNEY PLUS' NEW SHOW CALLED
"BIG SHOT."
HERE'S A CLIP.
>> COME ON.
HI.
MY NAME IS MARVIN COREN AND I
WILL BE ARM NEW COACH.
I HAVE BEEN INSTRUCTED TO BE
DIRECT WITH YOU.
SO I AM A NICE PERSON, SOMETIMES
I AM NOT.
EXPECT TO BE YELLED AT, DON'T
TAKE IT PERSONALLY.
IF I CALL YOU STUPID, I GIVE YOU
PERMISSION TO IGNORE IT, BUT IF
I TELL YOU WHY, I WANT YOU TO
PAY CLOSE ATTENTION.
>> IS HE FOR REAL?
>> Howie: PLEASE WELCOME MY
FRIEND AND NEIGHBOR JOHN STAMOS!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> HOWIE.
I'LL COME THE GARAGE!
>> Howie: WHAT ROOM ARE YOU
IN?
>> THIS IS MY WHOLE HOUSE, I
JUST LIVE IN THE LITTLE ROOM.
>> Ellen: YOU LIVE IN A ROOM
WITH A DRUM SET.
I WOULD HAVE INVITED YOU OVER,
BUT WE ARE TRYING TO STAY COVID
SAFE.
>> WE ARE NEIGHBORS AND WE GET
TO --
I EXPECTED A WELCOMING PARTY OR
SOME BAGELS AT MY DOORSTEP.
AND I GET NOTHING.
I GOT A WAY OF IN A MASK, AND I
THOUGHT IT WAS PATRICK STEWART
OR SOMETHING.
[LAUGHTER]
YOU CAN'T TELL BECAUSE OF THE
MASK.
>> Howie: THIS IS A GET
TOGETHER, SHOW ME AROUND THE
HOUSE, WHAT DO YOU HAVE THERE?
>> I COLLECT DISNEY MEMORABILIA.
YOU WILL SEE THE BIG D IN THE
BACKYARD.
THIS IS THE ACTUAL PHONE FROM
HIS OFFICE.
>> Howie: REALLY?
>> HI, I'M TALKING TO HOWIE.
>> Howie: THAT IS HIS REAL?
OH, MY GOD, THERE IT IS RIGHT
THERE.
THAT'S AMAZING!
>> I HAVE IT OF YOU.
THE PIRATE.
>> Howie: "PIRATES OF THE
CARIBBEAN."
I HAVE BEEN THERE MANY TIMES
WITH MY KIDS.
WHEN YOU GO TO DISNEY WORLD --
I DO LOVE PIRATES AND I LIKE THE
HAUNTED MANSION AND I LIKE IT'S
A SMALL WORLD.
I GO ON THEM ALL.
I LIKE TO WATCH MY KIDS' FACES.
WHEN WE GO, WE COME HOME WITH A
GOOFY HAT.
WE DON'T TAKE THE STUFF FROM THE
PARK.
[LAUGHTER]
WHAT IS THAT?
>> IT'S FROM A SMALL WORLD.
>> Howie: WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED
TO TAKE IT.
THEY SAY KEEP YOUR HANDS IN THE
BOAT!
>> OH, GOSH, I THOUGHT YOU WERE
ALLOWED TO TAKE IT AS A
SOUVENIR.
DO YOU RECOGNIZE THIS COUCH?
>> Howie: IS THAT FROM YOUR
SHOW?
>> YES, BOB SAGET IS BEHIND IT
SOMEWHERE.
>> Howie: YOU TOOK THE
FURNITURE FROM THE SHOW?
>> WHY NOT, I PRODUCED IT.
>> Howie: NOW YOU SEE I DON'T
WANT TO YOU TO COME TO MY HOUSE.
YOU TAKE STUFF.
>> WILL YOU SELL ANY HIT US THIS
WEEKEND?
>> Howie: I WOULD HAVE SOLD
THE TABLE, BUT I BROKE IT BY
ACCIDENT.
I AM SUCH A FAN OF EVERYTHING
YOU DO.
BEFORE THE BREAK, YOU HAVE YOUR
NEW SHOW "BIG SHOT," TELL
EVERYBODY ABOUT IT.
>> I PLAY A BASKETBALL COACH WHO
GETS KICKED OUT OF THE NCAA
BECAUSE HE HAS -- HE THROWS A
CHAIR LIKE BOBBY KNIGHT AND I
HAVE TO REDEEM MYSELF BY WORKING
AT AN ALL GIRLS PRIVATE
HIGH SCHOOL.
IN I SAW THE CLIP AND I KIND OF
COME IN AND FAT SHAME THEM AND
SAY ALL THE WRONG THINGS.
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL SHOW.
DAVID KELLY IS THE CREATOR.
>> Ellen: DAVID KELLY.
>> IT'S ABOUT REDEMPTION AND,
YOU KNOW, IT'S ASPIRATIONAL.
IT'S ONE OF THOSE GREAT TO --
ALTHOUGH I AM TERRIBLE, DID YOU
PLAY ANY SPORTS?
>> Howie: LOOK AT ME.
NO.
THE ONLY BALL I HAVE.
NO, I PLAY NO SPORTS.
I JUST SIT IN MY GARAGE AND FROM
TIME TO TIME PEOPLE BRING
CAMERAS.
THIS IS HOW I VISIT NEIGHBORS.
THE SHOW LOOKS GREAT AND DAVID
KELLY, I'M A HUGE FAN.
HE IS AMAZING.
AND YOU HAVE SUCH A RANGE FROM
COMEDY TO DRAMA AND YOU ARE JUST
ONE OF THE MOST TALENTED PEOPLE
I KNOW.
WHEN WE COME BACK I'M GOING TO
TAKE A BREAK, BECAUSE THIS IS SO
TIRING.
WHEN WE COME BACK I HAVE A GIFT
FOR YOU, WELCOME TO THE
NEIGHBORHOOD GIFT.
WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> Howie: WE ARE BACK IN MY
GARAGE WITH MY NEIGHBOR JOHN
STAMOS WHO HAS A BEAUTIFUL WIFE
AND A 2-YEAR-OLD SON BILLY.
WHAT IS THE FAMILY DOING DURING
THE PANDEMIC?
ARE YOU THIS COPING?
>> WE ARE OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT WE
HAVE BEEN DOING WHICH WE HAVE
NOT INVITED YOU TO, WE HAVE BEEN
HAVING MOVIE NIGHT OUTSIDE,
THERE IS A CUL-DE-SAC RIGHT
HERE, I KNOW, I SHOULD.
FOR MY BIRTHDAY, AS SOON AS THE
THREE AMIGOS, AND WE --
WE SHOW IT AT NIGHT AND I TEXTED
MARTY SURE AND I SAID OH, I HOPE
ALL IS WELL WITH YOUR FAMILY,
AND HE CAME IN, AND HE SAID, BUT
MORE IMPORTANTLY, DOES MY NED
STILL HOLED UP IN COVID TIMES?
>> Howie: DO YOU INVITE PEOPLE
OVER?
>> ON MY BIRTHDAY WE PLAYED
SHOWGIRLS IN THE BACKYARD AND
BOB WAS THERE.
THERE IS ME AND BOB SAGET FOR MY
BIRTHDAY.
>> Howie: SO YOU INVITE PEOPLE
OVER SOMETIMES?
>> YES, WHAT ARE YOU GETTING AT?
LET ME ASK YOU THIS, BECAUSE I
HAVE THE SPEEDO ISSUES.
AND I KNOW THAT YOU ARE A MUCKY
MUCK IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
CAN YOU HELP ME OUT?
>> Howie: I HAVE NEVER HAD A
MOSQUITO ISSUE.
>> HONESTLY?
>> Howie: I HAVE LIVED HERE
FOR 30 YEARS IN THIS
NEIGHBORHOOD AND I'VE NEVER
GOTTEN ONE MOSQUITO BITE.
AND THEY TOLD ME THAT YOU ARE
HAVING MOSQUITO ISSUES AND I
GOOGLED IT, AND MOSQUITOES ARE
ATTRACTED TO HAIR PRODUCT.
>> [LAUGHS]
THAT MAKE SENSE.
AND MAKE SENSE WHY THEY DON'T
BOTHER YOU.
[LAUGHTER]
>> Howie: I'M TRYING TO STAY
IN THE SUN HERE.
THIS IS MY HOUSE AND OTHERWISE
IT IS GOING TO GO DARK.
YOU HAVE LIGHT IN YOUR ROOM AND
I AM OUTSIDE IN MY DRIVEWAY AND
THE SUN IS GOING DOWN.
BUT ANYWAY, YOU ARE GREAT.
I TOLD YOU I HAVE A GIFT FOR
YOU, A HOUSEWARMING GIFT.
AND MARTHA STEWART MADE --
IT'S JUST, YOU ARE GOING TO SEE
IT.
IT'S BEAUTIFUL.
ALMOST LIKE A TULIP, WELCOME TO
THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
WHAT IS IT?
I MADE IT.
THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS.
YOU CAN WATCH "BIG SHOT" ON
DISNEY PLUS.
YOU CAN WATCH -- I WANT TO THINK
JOHN STAMOS, MARTHA STEWART, MY
FRIEND ELLEN FOR LETTING ME IN
MY OWN HOME!
THANK YOU AND I WANT TO THANK
EVERYBODY RIGHT THERE FOR
WATCHING.
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND, EVERYBODY.
GOODBYE!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪
>> Ellen: ANYWAY...