1 00:00:10,510 --> 00:00:13,221 Happy Halloween, everyone! Oh, that's great. 2 00:00:13,304 --> 00:00:15,556 Hey. Happy Halloween. 3 00:00:16,474 --> 00:00:17,850 Jan called. 4 00:00:19,018 --> 00:00:20,520 Okay. 5 00:00:21,604 --> 00:00:24,732 I know why she's calling. 6 00:00:25,274 --> 00:00:26,442 It's the end of the month, 7 00:00:26,526 --> 00:00:30,321 and I was supposed to let somebody go by the end of the month. 8 00:00:31,531 --> 00:00:34,951 And somehow I'm supposed to put on a costume and smile. 9 00:00:36,619 --> 00:00:38,496 - Okay. - Jan Levinson's office. 10 00:00:38,579 --> 00:00:40,915 Hey, Sherry, Michael Scott returning. 11 00:00:40,998 --> 00:00:42,583 Oh, she's in a meeting. 12 00:00:42,667 --> 00:00:45,336 She just wanted the name of the employee you let go. 13 00:00:45,419 --> 00:00:47,213 Well, I'm gonna wait until the end of the day, 14 00:00:47,296 --> 00:00:49,757 because the book said it's best to wait until the end of the day. 15 00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:52,093 I just need the name of who you're planning to let go. 16 00:00:52,176 --> 00:00:56,597 I don't know yet. I will have to call her back. 17 00:00:57,848 --> 00:00:59,976 I know she wanted the name. 18 00:01:00,351 --> 00:01:02,436 Okay, Sherry? Yeah. 19 00:01:02,770 --> 00:01:06,857 If you were getting fired, how would you wanna be told 20 00:01:06,941 --> 00:01:10,820 so that you could still be friends with the person firing you? 21 00:01:12,029 --> 00:01:14,282 Jan wants the name as soon as possible, Michael. 22 00:01:14,365 --> 00:01:16,701 Thanks. I'll call her back. 23 00:01:18,619 --> 00:01:20,746 I wish I could fire Sherry. 24 00:01:21,706 --> 00:01:23,916 Hey, I'm still here. Okay. I'm sorry. 25 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,167 Yeah. 26 00:01:25,251 --> 00:01:26,419 Okay. 27 00:01:26,502 --> 00:01:28,004 Hanging up now. 28 00:02:04,665 --> 00:02:08,294 I mean, you hear about layoffs in the news, 29 00:02:08,377 --> 00:02:12,757 but when you actually have to do it yourself, it is heavy stuff. It's... 30 00:02:13,341 --> 00:02:16,302 I mean, these are people's lives you're talking about. 31 00:02:16,719 --> 00:02:18,512 You wanted me? Yes. 32 00:02:25,728 --> 00:02:28,731 Papier-maché? Yes. Yes. 33 00:02:30,232 --> 00:02:31,233 Um... 34 00:02:31,609 --> 00:02:34,195 Pam, I have to let somebody go today. 35 00:02:35,029 --> 00:02:37,615 This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. 36 00:02:37,698 --> 00:02:39,575 Why did you put it off until Halloween? 37 00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:42,119 Because it's very scary stuff. 38 00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:44,580 I think it's gonna put a damper on the party a little. 39 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:47,500 You're worried about the party? There's a man's life at stake here. 40 00:02:47,583 --> 00:02:49,293 So it's a man? No. 41 00:02:50,211 --> 00:02:52,213 Or woman. A human life. 42 00:02:52,880 --> 00:02:55,216 If you had to guess who it would be 43 00:02:55,299 --> 00:02:58,469 based on their job performance 44 00:02:58,552 --> 00:03:02,181 and who you think deserves to be fired, who would that be? 45 00:03:02,598 --> 00:03:04,558 I just answer the phone. 46 00:03:05,351 --> 00:03:08,354 And sometimes you just let it go to voicemail. 47 00:03:14,735 --> 00:03:17,321 Your costume is fantastic. 48 00:03:18,948 --> 00:03:22,326 I know. I sent away for it in July from a catalog. 49 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,372 Oh, no. Don't, don't, don't, don't. 50 00:03:28,874 --> 00:03:30,000 Okay. 51 00:03:30,292 --> 00:03:34,046 Oh, man. Okay, I have to fire somebody. 52 00:03:38,634 --> 00:03:41,512 What is that? What are you supposed to be? 53 00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:44,890 I'm the three-hole punch version of Jim, 54 00:03:44,974 --> 00:03:48,519 'cause you can have me either way, plain white Jim or three-hole punch. 55 00:03:48,602 --> 00:03:51,105 - That's great. I like it. - Oh? Yeah. 56 00:03:51,188 --> 00:03:53,482 Yeah, well, look. What about me? 57 00:03:53,774 --> 00:03:55,151 What are... 58 00:03:56,235 --> 00:03:58,446 What are you? A monk? 59 00:04:00,489 --> 00:04:02,074 I'm a Sith lord. 60 00:04:04,368 --> 00:04:05,828 Oh, big deal. 61 00:04:06,078 --> 00:04:09,081 Three round pieces of paper taped to a shirt. 62 00:04:09,832 --> 00:04:11,834 This cost me $129. 63 00:04:12,668 --> 00:04:13,794 ASS. 64 00:04:18,090 --> 00:04:20,593 Hey, you guys excited about the party? 65 00:04:20,676 --> 00:04:22,261 It's gonna be fun. 66 00:04:22,344 --> 00:04:23,429 Yeah. Yes. 67 00:04:23,512 --> 00:04:27,141 Oh, and look at you. Showing your colors. 68 00:04:27,516 --> 00:04:30,352 Don't you wish you wore a dress every day. What are you implying? 69 00:04:30,436 --> 00:04:32,855 All good. Happy Halloween. 70 00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:36,066 What happened to all of those spooky decorations that we had, 71 00:04:36,150 --> 00:04:37,693 the cobwebs and such? 72 00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:40,613 Yeah, I don't know. We put them all up last night. 73 00:04:44,658 --> 00:04:47,912 Well, you know what? Go buy some more. I'll approve the overages. 74 00:04:47,995 --> 00:04:49,163 Sound good? Yeah. 75 00:04:49,246 --> 00:04:50,331 Good. 76 00:04:50,915 --> 00:04:53,918 Oh, yeah, also, about budget stuff... 77 00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:55,211 Um... 78 00:04:55,294 --> 00:04:59,089 I'm gonna need you to find, like, a full employee salary plus benefits. 79 00:04:59,173 --> 00:05:00,716 Like 50 grand. 80 00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:04,011 I'm gonna need you to find 50 grand in the numbers. 81 00:05:04,094 --> 00:05:05,846 But we don't keep two sets of books. 82 00:05:05,930 --> 00:05:08,307 Well, that's not what I'm saying. Just, you know, find it. 83 00:05:08,390 --> 00:05:10,851 Pretend that your jobs depend on it. 84 00:05:18,818 --> 00:05:21,904 Interesting take on Dorothy. I love it. 85 00:05:21,987 --> 00:05:25,533 Hey, you know what would even be better? A soccer ball and cleats. 86 00:05:25,616 --> 00:05:28,202 Why is that? Bend It Like Beckham. 87 00:05:28,452 --> 00:05:31,580 Oh, like the movie about the Indian girl who plays soccer? 88 00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:34,083 Yeah, that would be perfect. 89 00:05:35,251 --> 00:05:38,170 Yeah, I mean, I guess I could do that. 90 00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:40,339 It'd be funny. I don't really play soccer or anything. 91 00:05:40,422 --> 00:05:43,133 Well, I don't really have two heads. So... 92 00:05:43,217 --> 00:05:47,263 Wait, what are you again? Oh, right. Three-hole punch! 93 00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:54,144 Okay, greatest strength. Okay, okay. 94 00:05:55,062 --> 00:05:57,857 A dog-like obedience to authority. Nice. 95 00:05:58,816 --> 00:06:01,151 But that doesn't sound good. Okay, okay. 96 00:06:01,861 --> 00:06:04,446 How about the ultimate team player? 97 00:06:05,281 --> 00:06:07,283 Dwight is special. 98 00:06:07,658 --> 00:06:11,620 But I don't believe that his talents are being used in this office. 99 00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:14,039 So Pam and I have put his resume 100 00:06:14,123 --> 00:06:17,167 on Monster. com, Google, Craig's List. 101 00:06:17,585 --> 00:06:21,755 We're really interested most in jobs that take Dwight out of state. 102 00:06:22,715 --> 00:06:24,842 Preferably Alaska or India. 103 00:06:25,092 --> 00:06:26,635 He's a gun nut. 104 00:06:28,137 --> 00:06:29,889 Sticks to his guns. 105 00:06:31,432 --> 00:06:33,058 Well, I looked through all the budgets 106 00:06:33,142 --> 00:06:34,768 and there is one department... Yes. 107 00:06:34,852 --> 00:06:36,562 ...that has three people... Yeah. 108 00:06:36,645 --> 00:06:38,898 ...doing the work that could be done by two. 109 00:06:38,981 --> 00:06:40,482 This is great. 110 00:06:42,902 --> 00:06:43,903 Oh. 111 00:06:44,778 --> 00:06:45,863 Yeah. 112 00:06:47,156 --> 00:06:48,157 Oh. 113 00:06:48,657 --> 00:06:50,743 Who do you think it should be? Jim, definitely. 114 00:06:50,826 --> 00:06:52,244 No, Jim brings in money. 115 00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:53,954 Phyllis? 116 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:57,666 Stanley, Pam, Oscar, Meredith, 117 00:06:58,375 --> 00:07:00,336 Kevin, Angela. 118 00:07:00,419 --> 00:07:02,129 It's not a popularity contest. 119 00:07:02,212 --> 00:07:05,466 Although it does make sense to fire the least popular 120 00:07:05,549 --> 00:07:08,510 because that has the least effect on morale. 121 00:07:09,470 --> 00:07:11,513 One of the warehouse guys. 122 00:07:12,181 --> 00:07:13,265 What? 123 00:07:14,350 --> 00:07:18,145 There is someone left off that list? Who? Who is he saying? 124 00:07:19,563 --> 00:07:22,358 You're right. I didn't even think of him. 125 00:07:22,566 --> 00:07:23,943 No, Michael. 126 00:07:24,026 --> 00:07:26,070 Yeah, that's actually a really good idea. No. 127 00:07:26,153 --> 00:07:29,031 No. Not me. Yeah, I could. 128 00:07:29,114 --> 00:07:32,117 Not Dwight. I'm not saying that's what he said. 129 00:07:32,201 --> 00:07:33,953 I know that's what he said. 130 00:07:34,036 --> 00:07:35,120 What? 131 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:37,831 Tell him not Dwight. 132 00:07:37,915 --> 00:07:40,125 That is not a very nice thing to say about him. 133 00:07:40,209 --> 00:07:41,293 Tell him to stop. 134 00:07:41,377 --> 00:07:43,045 Are you kidding? Quiet, you! 135 00:07:43,128 --> 00:07:45,005 I agree. He'd land on his feet. 136 00:07:45,089 --> 00:07:46,256 Make him be quiet. 137 00:07:49,843 --> 00:07:53,055 Those aren't chips and dip. No, I made brownies. 138 00:07:55,599 --> 00:07:56,684 What? 139 00:07:56,767 --> 00:08:00,521 I'm just trying to figure out why you're sabotaging things. 140 00:08:01,021 --> 00:08:04,942 I made brownies. And I made cookies. Same category. 141 00:08:07,903 --> 00:08:11,198 I'm guessing Angela's the one in the neighborhood 142 00:08:11,281 --> 00:08:15,369 who gives the trick-or-treaters some toothbrushes, 143 00:08:16,745 --> 00:08:17,955 pennies, 144 00:08:19,248 --> 00:08:20,499 walnuts... 145 00:08:20,582 --> 00:08:22,418 Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam. 146 00:08:24,211 --> 00:08:25,295 Yeah. 147 00:08:26,672 --> 00:08:30,801 Just one second. I will transfer you to our manager, Michael Scott. 148 00:08:33,470 --> 00:08:34,555 Wow. 149 00:08:37,266 --> 00:08:39,018 Michael Scott here. 150 00:08:39,518 --> 00:08:42,980 Yes, I am regional manager of this orifice. 151 00:08:43,647 --> 00:08:44,773 Hmm-hmm. 152 00:08:45,774 --> 00:08:48,736 Dwight Schrute is amazing. 153 00:08:49,528 --> 00:08:50,571 Yeah. 154 00:08:50,654 --> 00:08:54,783 No, he is actually the single greatest employee of his generation. 155 00:08:55,784 --> 00:08:56,785 Hmm-hmm. 156 00:08:56,952 --> 00:08:58,495 You know what? I'm gonna tell you what. 157 00:08:58,579 --> 00:09:02,624 You hire Dwight K. Schrute and he does not meet, 158 00:09:02,708 --> 00:09:07,379 nay, exceed every one of your wildest expectations, 159 00:09:07,463 --> 00:09:12,134 well, then, you can hold me, Michael Gary Scott 160 00:09:12,342 --> 00:09:15,137 personally and financially responsible. 161 00:09:15,220 --> 00:09:18,432 Okay. Okay. Okay. 162 00:09:19,141 --> 00:09:20,267 Okay. 163 00:09:26,732 --> 00:09:29,651 Stanley, could you come with me, please? No. 164 00:09:32,821 --> 00:09:35,199 As Assistant Regional Manager... To the? 165 00:09:35,282 --> 00:09:37,951 Look, I've got some bad news. 166 00:09:38,619 --> 00:09:41,789 You're fired. You need to pack up your things and go. 167 00:09:42,414 --> 00:09:46,043 I'm serious, Stanley. It's over. I'm sorry. 168 00:09:46,126 --> 00:09:47,669 "You're fired." 169 00:09:48,253 --> 00:09:50,506 Get your fingers off my phone. 170 00:09:56,261 --> 00:09:59,640 So, how did it go with Stanley? How did he take it? 171 00:09:59,723 --> 00:10:01,767 He wouldn't listen to me. Oh, come on. 172 00:10:01,850 --> 00:10:04,186 If you wanna fire him, you're gonna have to tell him yourself. 173 00:10:04,269 --> 00:10:06,271 I don't wanna fire Stanley. I never said that. 174 00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:09,149 I'm certainly not going to do it myself. 175 00:10:09,316 --> 00:10:12,528 Get those big baleful eyes staring at me. 176 00:10:12,611 --> 00:10:15,614 Yikes. Just... Okay, just... 177 00:10:17,282 --> 00:10:18,909 Cumberland Mills? 178 00:10:20,369 --> 00:10:22,621 And how did you get my résumé? 179 00:10:23,330 --> 00:10:25,666 Oh, no, no. I'm very flattered. Don't get me wrong. 180 00:10:25,749 --> 00:10:29,002 I'm just not sure that it's my official resume 181 00:10:29,086 --> 00:10:31,421 or if it's something that maybe 182 00:10:32,005 --> 00:10:34,508 a satisfied customer posted online. 183 00:10:35,884 --> 00:10:38,887 What does it say under martial arts training? 184 00:10:39,930 --> 00:10:42,391 Oh, okay, I'm gonna have to supplement that. 185 00:10:42,474 --> 00:10:44,685 Could I have your fax number? 186 00:10:44,852 --> 00:10:48,689 Would I ever leave this company? Look, I'm all about loyalty. 187 00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:52,943 In fact, I feel like part of what I'm getting paid for here is my loyalty. 188 00:10:53,485 --> 00:10:57,447 But if there were somewhere else that valued that loyalty more highly, 189 00:10:57,948 --> 00:11:01,368 I'm going wherever they value loyalty the most. 190 00:11:04,496 --> 00:11:05,747 Oh, hey. 191 00:11:06,790 --> 00:11:10,169 Oh, your dress is stuck in the back. Gotta just... 192 00:11:10,252 --> 00:11:11,253 Oh. 193 00:11:14,965 --> 00:11:16,675 So you got the fax. 194 00:11:16,758 --> 00:11:19,052 So why didn't you add it to the résumé? 195 00:11:19,136 --> 00:11:22,055 What do you mean? Of course, martial arts training is relevant. 196 00:11:22,139 --> 00:11:23,265 Oh, excuse me, 197 00:11:23,348 --> 00:11:26,393 I know about a billion Asians that would beg to differ. 198 00:11:27,686 --> 00:11:30,731 Yeah, I get a little frustrated when I'm dealing with incompetence! 199 00:11:30,814 --> 00:11:32,524 Well, you know what? You can go to hell, too, 200 00:11:32,608 --> 00:11:34,860 and I will see you there burning. 201 00:11:34,943 --> 00:11:39,114 Fine. Oh, wait, so you'll let me know when you've made a decision... 202 00:11:43,410 --> 00:11:45,287 Jim is really talented. 203 00:11:45,829 --> 00:11:49,249 And he should be the one who's getting a better job offer. 204 00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:50,834 Like, for real. 205 00:11:50,918 --> 00:11:55,547 Don't take this the wrong way, but you should go for that job. 206 00:11:58,675 --> 00:11:59,843 Um... 207 00:12:01,470 --> 00:12:03,805 It's in Maryland. Yeah. 208 00:12:04,348 --> 00:12:06,141 But, I mean, look at the salary, 209 00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:10,604 and it's definitely a step up and a challenge. 210 00:12:12,981 --> 00:12:14,107 Yeah. 211 00:12:17,277 --> 00:12:19,488 Yeah. You know what, maybe... 212 00:12:21,073 --> 00:12:22,532 Maybe I will. 213 00:12:25,744 --> 00:12:26,954 Jim. 214 00:12:28,455 --> 00:12:31,333 This is called leveraging an offer. 215 00:12:32,834 --> 00:12:36,171 Michael, can I talk to you for a moment? Oh, God. 216 00:12:36,255 --> 00:12:40,467 I just thought you should know that I was just offered a job 217 00:12:40,550 --> 00:12:42,844 with better pay, better benefits, 218 00:12:42,928 --> 00:12:45,931 and a better title at Cumberland Mills. 219 00:12:46,014 --> 00:12:48,058 Fantastic. And I turned it down. 220 00:12:48,141 --> 00:12:50,519 What? That would have solved all my problems. 221 00:12:50,602 --> 00:12:54,690 Out of loyalty to this company. Oh, you idiot. Go. 222 00:12:54,773 --> 00:12:57,776 So I was hoping to be made Assistant Regional Manager officially. 223 00:12:57,859 --> 00:13:00,445 If you left, I wouldn't have to fire anybody. 224 00:13:00,529 --> 00:13:02,739 But then you wouldn't have me here. Big deal. 225 00:13:02,823 --> 00:13:05,784 Oh, it would have worked out so well. Can you get it back? 226 00:13:05,867 --> 00:13:07,953 It's in Maryland. You could call. Can you call them? 227 00:13:08,036 --> 00:13:10,747 I can't... I suppose I... No. 228 00:13:11,248 --> 00:13:13,750 They never really made me an offer anyway. 229 00:13:13,917 --> 00:13:16,878 Why are you torturing me? God. 230 00:13:19,298 --> 00:13:23,969 Honestly, I don't think Michael has the slightest clue of who he's gonna fire. 231 00:13:24,052 --> 00:13:26,930 I think he keeps hoping that someone's gonna volunteer, 232 00:13:27,014 --> 00:13:29,933 or be run over by a bus before the deadline. 233 00:13:30,851 --> 00:13:32,644 But in the end, really, what's gonna happen is 234 00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:36,315 it's gonna be the first person to give him a dirty look in the hall. 235 00:13:36,398 --> 00:13:39,318 And therein lies the true essence of his charisma. 236 00:13:41,153 --> 00:13:44,573 Can I speak to you a minute? Yes. 237 00:14:10,682 --> 00:14:13,685 Michael, I really didn't mean to... Help me. 238 00:14:14,603 --> 00:14:17,689 I'm sorry? I want you to role-play firing me. 239 00:14:17,773 --> 00:14:20,275 I want you to fire me, and I will take it. 240 00:14:20,984 --> 00:14:22,402 Oh, you want me to be you. Yes. 241 00:14:22,486 --> 00:14:24,446 Okay. I want you to be me and I will be Creed. 242 00:14:24,529 --> 00:14:26,531 Oh, are you firing Creed? No, no, no. 243 00:14:26,615 --> 00:14:30,077 That's just first thing... Came... Can't... That head... 244 00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:33,538 We should switch seats in order to... Yes, that's a good idea. 245 00:14:33,622 --> 00:14:34,956 All right? 246 00:14:35,874 --> 00:14:37,209 Excuse me. 247 00:14:42,172 --> 00:14:44,466 I'm really sorry, but I have to let you go. 248 00:14:44,549 --> 00:14:48,011 And it's purely budgetary. It's not personal... 249 00:14:49,429 --> 00:14:52,307 I'm gonna kill myself! Wow. 250 00:14:52,391 --> 00:14:55,227 I'm going to kill myself and it's your fault! 251 00:14:55,310 --> 00:14:56,895 That's an overreaction. 252 00:14:56,978 --> 00:14:59,439 Corporate is really breathing down my neck 253 00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:02,109 and they're saying this has to be done by the end of the month... 254 00:15:02,192 --> 00:15:04,528 Is this you? Are you being you? Or is this Creed? 255 00:15:04,611 --> 00:15:06,363 Are you... I am... 256 00:15:07,489 --> 00:15:09,324 This is Creed. Okay. 257 00:15:09,408 --> 00:15:12,244 I'm improvising. So just try to keep up. 258 00:15:12,327 --> 00:15:13,829 And I'm very angry. Hold that thought. 259 00:15:13,912 --> 00:15:15,956 And I want... I'm gonna kill you. Michael Scott here. 260 00:15:16,039 --> 00:15:18,166 I'm gonna kill you for firing me. Toby. 261 00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:19,334 I really have to take this, Creed, 262 00:15:19,418 --> 00:15:21,378 so it was really a pleasure working with you, okay? 263 00:15:21,461 --> 00:15:24,131 Get off. Get off. No, no. Just get up. 264 00:15:29,094 --> 00:15:30,846 Just, just... Yeah. 265 00:15:33,598 --> 00:15:36,143 What happened? It wasn't me. 266 00:15:36,226 --> 00:15:40,230 Oh, that was, like, crazy, because I was... Yeah, I know. 267 00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:50,824 Hey, Creed? 268 00:15:52,159 --> 00:15:54,536 Could I talk to you for a second? 269 00:15:58,707 --> 00:16:02,627 You are great and very ambitious, 270 00:16:03,795 --> 00:16:07,340 and I feel like you want more than this little office has to offer. 271 00:16:07,424 --> 00:16:10,635 And I understand that you'd want to just spread your wings 272 00:16:10,927 --> 00:16:13,805 and fly the coop. What are you telling me? 273 00:16:13,889 --> 00:16:17,559 We're gonna have to... You want something better. 274 00:16:17,642 --> 00:16:20,020 No, I don't. I wanna stay right here. 275 00:16:20,103 --> 00:16:23,440 No, you wanna leave. No, I wanna stay here. 276 00:16:23,523 --> 00:16:26,067 Now, why are you making this so hard? 277 00:16:26,151 --> 00:16:27,944 I think there's a misunderstanding about this. 278 00:16:28,028 --> 00:16:29,237 I think you're right. 279 00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:31,740 Can 1 go? No, of course you can't go! 280 00:16:31,823 --> 00:16:35,494 We haven't even started this horrible process of... 281 00:16:35,994 --> 00:16:38,038 Okay, Creed. 282 00:16:38,413 --> 00:16:41,917 I need to let somebody go today. 283 00:16:43,335 --> 00:16:45,921 They told me I need to let somebody go. 284 00:16:46,004 --> 00:16:48,715 And as much as I think you're a great guy, and I like you, 285 00:16:48,798 --> 00:16:51,134 you're... Goodbye. 286 00:16:52,427 --> 00:16:53,970 Let's fight it. 287 00:16:54,262 --> 00:16:57,307 Let's call Jan and fight this thing together like the old days. 288 00:16:57,390 --> 00:16:58,975 What old days? What are you talking about? 289 00:16:59,059 --> 00:17:00,685 Did you start the paperwork yet? 290 00:17:00,769 --> 00:17:02,062 It's right here on the desk, yeah. 291 00:17:02,145 --> 00:17:04,648 You don't have to do this, Michael. I can't, though. 292 00:17:04,731 --> 00:17:06,983 Undo it! I can't change anything. 293 00:17:07,067 --> 00:17:09,069 This is the way it... No. You have the power to undo it. 294 00:17:09,152 --> 00:17:11,446 I don't. Okay, just let's not... You can undo it. 295 00:17:11,530 --> 00:17:12,906 Michael, undo it! 296 00:17:13,031 --> 00:17:16,076 Yeah, I went hunting once. Shot the deer in the leg. 297 00:17:16,576 --> 00:17:19,204 Had to kill it with a shovel, took about an hour. 298 00:17:19,287 --> 00:17:20,497 Why do you ask? 299 00:17:20,580 --> 00:17:23,500 I have to fire someone today. Okay? 300 00:17:23,583 --> 00:17:28,129 Fine. Fire someone else. Fire Devon. He's terrible. 301 00:17:28,213 --> 00:17:30,840 I am so much better at my job than Devon. 302 00:17:30,924 --> 00:17:33,843 Okay, well, I already picked you and you know that, 303 00:17:33,927 --> 00:17:36,846 So, unless I just go through with this, 304 00:17:36,930 --> 00:17:39,558 you're always gonna look at me as the guy who almost fired you. 305 00:17:39,641 --> 00:17:43,812 No, no, no, no, no, no. I will forget so fast. You will be my savior. 306 00:17:43,895 --> 00:17:47,107 You're the guy who gave me my life back. 307 00:17:47,732 --> 00:17:50,277 Thank you. I knew you'd see it my way, Michael. 308 00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:51,403 God bless you. 309 00:17:51,486 --> 00:17:53,029 You're a fine man. Don't... 310 00:17:53,113 --> 00:17:54,739 Listen, you will not regret this, either. 311 00:17:54,823 --> 00:17:57,367 Devon is terrible. No one's gonna miss him. 312 00:17:58,410 --> 00:18:00,328 Good, good, good, good. 313 00:18:16,511 --> 00:18:19,222 Devon, could I talk to you for a second? 314 00:18:20,098 --> 00:18:22,142 Creed's an idiot. You know that. Well, he... 315 00:18:22,225 --> 00:18:25,145 No, no, no, no, no, no. You had it right the first time! 316 00:18:25,228 --> 00:18:29,107 Well, maybe I did. Exactly, you gotta go with your gut, man. 317 00:18:31,234 --> 00:18:33,111 No, I can't... 318 00:18:33,194 --> 00:18:36,156 No, I can't go back. I would look like an idiot. 319 00:18:36,239 --> 00:18:37,907 That's why I'm being fired? No. 320 00:18:37,991 --> 00:18:39,451 So you might not look like an idiot? 321 00:18:39,534 --> 00:18:41,036 No, it was all the stuff that I said. 322 00:18:41,119 --> 00:18:43,580 It was the business downturn and cutbacks, and... 323 00:18:43,663 --> 00:18:45,957 You... God, this is unbelievable! 324 00:18:46,041 --> 00:18:49,044 I just hope that you and I can remain friends. 325 00:18:51,588 --> 00:18:54,049 Devon, wait. Please. What? 326 00:18:54,132 --> 00:18:55,592 Look, look. 327 00:18:57,260 --> 00:18:59,929 In addition to severance and everything, 328 00:19:00,013 --> 00:19:02,891 I want to give you 329 00:19:04,517 --> 00:19:07,562 this gift certificate to Chili's from me. 330 00:19:09,356 --> 00:19:11,232 Okay? No hard feelings. 331 00:19:14,986 --> 00:19:19,491 Kevin, Jim, Pam, Kelly, Toby, Oscar, Meredith, 332 00:19:19,741 --> 00:19:21,993 Phyllis, Stanley, or the temp. 333 00:19:22,369 --> 00:19:25,413 If any of you wanna meet me for a drink, I'm gonna be at Poor Richard's. 334 00:19:25,497 --> 00:19:27,957 And the rest of you can go to hell. 335 00:19:35,006 --> 00:19:37,300 What about the Halloween party? 336 00:19:40,887 --> 00:19:43,306 Oh, hey, Jim. Wait, stop. 337 00:19:45,517 --> 00:19:48,395 I'm sorry for pushing you toward Cumberland. 338 00:19:49,938 --> 00:19:53,483 Seriously, if you left here, I would blow my brains out. 339 00:19:55,568 --> 00:19:56,820 Come on. 340 00:19:57,737 --> 00:19:59,906 That's just a figure of speech, you know. 341 00:19:59,989 --> 00:20:02,158 Blow your brains out? Come on. 342 00:20:02,242 --> 00:20:04,202 All it really means is that we're friends. 343 00:20:04,285 --> 00:20:07,956 And who else is she gonna talk to if I'm gone? Right? 344 00:20:08,581 --> 00:20:11,543 I mean, if she left, I wouldn't blow my brains out. 345 00:20:11,626 --> 00:20:15,213 Of course, I would take that job in Maryland because it's double the pay 346 00:20:15,296 --> 00:20:18,842 and soft-shell crab just happens to be my favorite food. 347 00:20:26,808 --> 00:20:27,892 !/ love Halloween. 348 00:20:27,976 --> 00:20:31,604 You know, it's just... But it's just fun. Every year, it's just fun. 349 00:20:31,688 --> 00:20:34,858 Last Halloween, I came as Janet Jackson's boob. 350 00:20:36,401 --> 00:20:39,279 It was topical. People got a big kick out of it. 351 00:20:39,362 --> 00:20:42,365 The year before that I came as Monica Lewinsky, 352 00:20:42,991 --> 00:20:45,076 and I wore a stained dress. 353 00:20:45,618 --> 00:20:48,455 The year before that, I also came as Monica Lewinsky, 354 00:20:48,538 --> 00:20:52,459 and before that I was O.J. It was pretty funny. 355 00:20:52,542 --> 00:20:54,669 Oh, I wish you were here last year. 356 00:21:03,678 --> 00:21:05,513 Trick-or-treat! 357 00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:07,474 Hey. How you doing? 358 00:21:07,557 --> 00:21:09,642 Wow, you guys look great! 359 00:21:09,726 --> 00:21:12,854 I'm a bumble bee. You look great. 360 00:21:13,062 --> 00:21:15,231 And you're a princess? A fairy princess. 361 00:21:15,315 --> 00:21:17,442 A fairy princess. You're very... I'm a lion! 362 00:21:17,525 --> 00:21:19,611 You're a lion. Wow. I wanna hear your... 363 00:21:19,694 --> 00:21:22,739 Oh! Okay, that's all yours. That's all yours. Okay! 364 00:21:22,822 --> 00:21:23,907 Grab it. Grab it. 365 00:21:23,990 --> 00:21:25,825 You know what? You guys are getting all of these.