1 00:00:00,828 --> 00:00:01,957 Hold it! 2 00:00:05,776 --> 00:00:08,194 New glasses. 3 00:00:11,932 --> 00:00:15,334 Dwight, what a ridiculous, fancy clown you are. 4 00:00:15,368 --> 00:00:19,555 I am dressed according to the Schrute codes of mourning. 5 00:00:19,589 --> 00:00:20,990 My aunt Shirley has died. 6 00:00:21,024 --> 00:00:22,958 Oh, Dwight, I'm so sorry. 7 00:00:22,993 --> 00:00:24,794 Were you guys close? 8 00:00:24,828 --> 00:00:25,978 I would say that she raised me, 9 00:00:26,012 --> 00:00:27,029 but let's not kid each other. 10 00:00:27,063 --> 00:00:28,397 I raised myself. 11 00:00:28,431 --> 00:00:29,532 She was, however, 12 00:00:29,566 --> 00:00:31,033 the closest thing I had to a mother. 13 00:00:31,051 --> 00:00:33,469 My actual mother was very cold and distant. 14 00:00:33,503 --> 00:00:35,070 I'd say she was the closest thing I had 15 00:00:35,105 --> 00:00:36,705 to an aunt. 16 00:00:36,740 --> 00:00:38,607 - My condolences. - Keep them! 17 00:00:38,642 --> 00:00:40,209 Okay. Now, what do we got in these two pails? 18 00:00:40,227 --> 00:00:41,710 In keeping with Schrute custom, 19 00:00:41,728 --> 00:00:44,096 I will either invite you to Saturday's funeral 20 00:00:44,131 --> 00:00:48,050 by sprinkling red, fertile dirt in your face, 21 00:00:48,084 --> 00:00:50,102 or I will ask you to keep a respectful distance 22 00:00:50,137 --> 00:00:51,687 during my time of grief, 23 00:00:51,721 --> 00:00:54,790 with a dusting of black, slightly acidic soil. 24 00:00:59,796 --> 00:01:01,096 What color is it? 25 00:01:01,131 --> 00:01:02,598 It looks pretty black. 26 00:01:05,235 --> 00:01:07,419 [Spits] 27 00:01:11,141 --> 00:01:13,642 Yep. Acidic all right. 28 00:01:15,445 --> 00:01:17,563 [Whispering] Oh, thank God. 29 00:01:17,597 --> 00:01:18,898 Excuse me? 30 00:01:18,932 --> 00:01:20,182 Oh, I'm so sorry, Dwight. 31 00:01:20,216 --> 00:01:21,817 And if you want me to be there, 32 00:01:21,852 --> 00:01:23,953 of course I will go. 33 00:01:23,987 --> 00:01:26,255 It's just... I have a personal training session. 34 00:01:26,289 --> 00:01:28,307 Okay, that's not-- 35 00:01:30,060 --> 00:01:31,544 - I get red dirt. 36 00:01:31,578 --> 00:01:32,728 Nobody is getting red dirt. 37 00:01:32,746 --> 00:01:35,114 I should've kept my mouth shut. 38 00:01:35,165 --> 00:01:36,398 We're not even that close. 39 00:01:36,433 --> 00:01:38,551 I've only known Dwight 12 years. 40 00:01:38,585 --> 00:01:40,569 12 years. 41 00:01:40,587 --> 00:01:42,755 Time is a son of a bitch. 42 00:01:46,843 --> 00:01:49,795 I'm sure-- I'm sure she's in a better place. 43 00:01:49,829 --> 00:01:53,916 [Whispering] I really hope so. 44 00:01:55,084 --> 00:01:57,369 Okay, now this is crazy. 45 00:01:57,404 --> 00:01:59,972 You can't make a dirtball-- 46 00:02:00,006 --> 00:02:01,640 - [Crying] I miss her so much. - Okay. 47 00:02:01,675 --> 00:02:04,293 - You know? - [Sighs] 48 00:02:04,311 --> 00:02:05,594 Aah! 49 00:02:05,628 --> 00:02:08,514 [Cheerful music] 50 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:26,495 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 51 00:02:29,135 --> 00:02:32,621 ♪ There's a bright golden haze ♪ 52 00:02:32,656 --> 00:02:34,340 [Guitar playing] ♪ on the meadow ♪ 53 00:02:34,374 --> 00:02:37,459 ♪ a bright golden haze on the meadow ♪ 54 00:02:37,493 --> 00:02:39,461 [Engine running] 55 00:02:40,997 --> 00:02:43,399 - Ziek's here. - Ziek! 56 00:02:43,433 --> 00:02:45,251 Hey, Dwight. 57 00:02:45,285 --> 00:02:47,086 Mose, mom says hi. 58 00:02:47,137 --> 00:02:50,005 Hi to mom. 59 00:02:50,039 --> 00:02:51,257 You going? 60 00:02:51,291 --> 00:02:52,608 Will there be ghosts there? 61 00:02:52,642 --> 00:02:56,328 - [Sighs] Get in the sidecar. - Get in the sidecar. 62 00:02:56,363 --> 00:02:57,630 Get in the sidecar. 63 00:02:57,664 --> 00:02:58,664 - You get in the sidecar. - Get-- 64 00:03:05,655 --> 00:03:07,373 What are you doing here? 65 00:03:07,407 --> 00:03:08,507 You invited me. 66 00:03:08,558 --> 00:03:10,059 You threw the red dirt in my face. 67 00:03:10,093 --> 00:03:12,427 Oh, yeah. [Laughs] 68 00:03:13,713 --> 00:03:15,047 [Horn honking] Who is that? 69 00:03:15,081 --> 00:03:16,749 Jeb, my brother. 70 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:18,751 - You have a brother? - Mm-hmm. 71 00:03:18,802 --> 00:03:20,803 I didn't really see a better parking spot. 72 00:03:20,837 --> 00:03:22,388 Oh! 73 00:03:22,422 --> 00:03:24,957 Look what I did. [Chuckles] 74 00:03:24,991 --> 00:03:25,991 [Car door slams] 75 00:03:26,026 --> 00:03:28,761 It's a rental. 76 00:03:31,247 --> 00:03:34,216 [Both grunting] 77 00:03:34,250 --> 00:03:35,484 - You wanna go in? - No, you do! 78 00:03:35,518 --> 00:03:36,819 You wanna go in? You wanna go in? 79 00:03:36,853 --> 00:03:38,570 - I'll put you in there. - Okay, I'll put you-- 80 00:03:38,605 --> 00:03:39,822 - Here we go. - Oh! 81 00:03:39,856 --> 00:03:41,023 Oh, no! Oh, no! 82 00:03:41,057 --> 00:03:42,725 Uncle! Uncle! Uncle! Uncle! Uncle! Oh! 83 00:03:44,627 --> 00:03:47,396 - Oh, gosh. - Hey, moonface. 84 00:03:47,430 --> 00:03:50,666 Nice to see those shiny little Chinese eyes of yours. 85 00:03:50,700 --> 00:03:52,701 Who's this guy? 86 00:03:52,719 --> 00:03:55,237 - Bad. - Hi, all! 87 00:03:55,271 --> 00:03:56,972 Why are you here, Todd? 88 00:03:56,990 --> 00:03:59,375 Okay, let's get right to it, I guess. 89 00:03:59,409 --> 00:04:02,144 My name is Todd Packer, and I am in recovery. 90 00:04:02,178 --> 00:04:03,595 I'm working the steps. 91 00:04:03,647 --> 00:04:06,498 I'm on step eight of Alcoholics Anonymous, 92 00:04:06,533 --> 00:04:08,817 step nine of Narcotics Anonymous. 93 00:04:08,835 --> 00:04:10,602 I'm here to make amends. 94 00:04:10,637 --> 00:04:13,772 I've been hard to deal with over the past years. 95 00:04:13,823 --> 00:04:16,492 Kind of a jerk. I know it. 96 00:04:16,526 --> 00:04:19,044 I don't need you to accept my apology, 97 00:04:19,079 --> 00:04:21,730 but I'd love it if you did. 98 00:04:21,765 --> 00:04:23,799 Packer, we accept. 99 00:04:23,817 --> 00:04:25,401 [All protesting] 100 00:04:25,435 --> 00:04:26,568 Actually, they have a specific way 101 00:04:26,603 --> 00:04:28,387 I need to do this, 102 00:04:28,421 --> 00:04:29,788 and I have to go through examples of stuff. 103 00:04:29,839 --> 00:04:31,757 Okay, uh, where to begin? 104 00:04:31,791 --> 00:04:33,258 Hey... 105 00:04:33,293 --> 00:04:35,561 Pam-Pam and her pam-pams. 106 00:04:35,595 --> 00:04:39,915 Well, I have said some crude things about those. 107 00:04:39,949 --> 00:04:41,984 But they are beautiful, 108 00:04:42,018 --> 00:04:45,304 and I guess that's why I acted out. 109 00:04:45,338 --> 00:04:48,691 Pam, I'm sorry I objectified you 110 00:04:48,725 --> 00:04:51,810 and personified your breasts. 111 00:04:51,845 --> 00:04:54,930 Sorry, guys. 112 00:04:54,964 --> 00:04:56,432 Oh, boy. 113 00:04:56,466 --> 00:05:00,569 I have not been nice to you. 114 00:05:00,603 --> 00:05:01,787 Phylly, 115 00:05:01,821 --> 00:05:05,207 I'm sorry for the things I said about your size 116 00:05:05,225 --> 00:05:07,342 to your face, behind your back, 117 00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:09,511 and in the form of drawings. 118 00:05:09,529 --> 00:05:11,613 Actually, that goes to all you double XLs. 119 00:05:11,647 --> 00:05:13,599 Stanley, Kevin... 120 00:05:13,633 --> 00:05:15,501 this kid in a few years. 121 00:05:15,552 --> 00:05:18,387 Todd, you're just saying insults 122 00:05:18,421 --> 00:05:20,055 in the form of an apology. 123 00:05:20,089 --> 00:05:22,341 Why can't I just be nice? 124 00:05:22,375 --> 00:05:27,012 Truth is I really like you guys. I really do. 125 00:05:27,046 --> 00:05:30,916 Okay, the apology's just half of it. 126 00:05:30,967 --> 00:05:32,918 The big thing is making amends, 127 00:05:32,969 --> 00:05:35,053 and that's why I brought these. 128 00:05:35,088 --> 00:05:37,005 I went out to the Steamtown mall, 129 00:05:37,039 --> 00:05:40,208 and I got you all cupcakes from that place Nipples. 130 00:05:40,226 --> 00:05:42,377 Think it's called Nibbles. 131 00:05:42,395 --> 00:05:44,980 Ha. The mind sees what it wants to, huh? 132 00:05:45,014 --> 00:05:46,682 Ohh... 133 00:05:46,716 --> 00:05:49,735 there you go. 134 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:56,408 Hey, hey, guys. Wait. 135 00:05:56,443 --> 00:05:58,076 Before we accept these cupcakes, 136 00:05:58,111 --> 00:06:00,412 I think we need to have a conversation privately 137 00:06:00,447 --> 00:06:01,997 in the conference room. 138 00:06:02,031 --> 00:06:03,665 Don't eat the cupcake. 139 00:06:05,804 --> 00:06:08,768 We are here today 140 00:06:08,857 --> 00:06:13,160 to join this woman on the ground.... 141 00:06:13,211 --> 00:06:14,778 Man is born of woman, 142 00:06:14,796 --> 00:06:18,482 and his life is full of turmoil. 143 00:06:18,516 --> 00:06:20,617 [Laughs] 144 00:06:20,651 --> 00:06:22,786 It's crap soil. Nothing's gonna grow here. 145 00:06:22,821 --> 00:06:24,771 It doesn't matter. It's a cemetery. 146 00:06:24,806 --> 00:06:27,274 Yeah, well, I'm saying it's garbage soil, that's all. 147 00:06:27,325 --> 00:06:29,326 Well, the only thing we're planting here is dead bodies. 148 00:06:29,344 --> 00:06:31,495 That's fine, 'cause they're not gonna grow. 149 00:06:31,529 --> 00:06:33,297 Well, thank God they're not, 150 00:06:33,331 --> 00:06:34,731 because we don't wanna make zombies. 151 00:06:34,749 --> 00:06:36,850 Good. I agree. Don't worry about it. 152 00:06:36,885 --> 00:06:38,535 You won't get any. 153 00:06:38,570 --> 00:06:41,154 Would the family care to say something? 154 00:06:44,592 --> 00:06:47,811 You had black hair and then gray hair. 155 00:06:49,697 --> 00:06:51,999 You were the aunt to my cousins. 156 00:06:52,033 --> 00:06:54,218 Most of your life, you were 5'4". 157 00:06:54,252 --> 00:06:56,920 At the end, you were 5'1". 158 00:07:00,792 --> 00:07:03,393 They're a descriptive people. 159 00:07:05,597 --> 00:07:07,414 [Whispering] I see you started without me. 160 00:07:07,448 --> 00:07:10,067 You were late, so... what am I supposed to do? 161 00:07:10,101 --> 00:07:11,518 - Hi, Fanny. - Hey. 162 00:07:11,553 --> 00:07:13,203 - How are you? - Who is that? 163 00:07:13,221 --> 00:07:15,138 - Dwight's sister. - Dwight has a sister? 164 00:07:15,173 --> 00:07:17,024 Yeah. 165 00:07:17,058 --> 00:07:18,525 She's beautiful. 166 00:07:18,576 --> 00:07:20,177 Blech. [Scoffs] 167 00:07:20,211 --> 00:07:23,964 Hello, little man. Haven't seen you in a few years. 168 00:07:24,015 --> 00:07:26,950 Wha-- what is this-- oh, God. 169 00:07:26,985 --> 00:07:29,069 [Inaudible] What'd he-- 170 00:07:30,705 --> 00:07:33,407 - Henry. - Dwight. 171 00:07:33,441 --> 00:07:35,826 I see Esther's back in town. 172 00:07:35,860 --> 00:07:37,427 Hi, Dwight. 173 00:07:37,462 --> 00:07:39,763 Hi, Esther. Nice of you to come today. 174 00:07:39,797 --> 00:07:43,633 This was on the way. We're going into town after. 175 00:07:43,651 --> 00:07:45,736 I need yarn. 176 00:07:45,770 --> 00:07:47,421 Well, if you can snap two chicken necks 177 00:07:47,455 --> 00:07:48,755 with a single motion, 178 00:07:48,806 --> 00:07:51,441 why use two motions to slaughter those chickens? 179 00:07:51,476 --> 00:07:53,977 [Chuckles] 180 00:07:53,995 --> 00:07:55,329 We're at a funeral. There's a funeral going on here. 181 00:07:55,380 --> 00:07:57,047 - Okay. - Okay. 182 00:07:57,081 --> 00:07:59,399 - Anyone mention her height? - Yep. 183 00:07:59,434 --> 00:08:03,287 Land size? 184 00:08:03,321 --> 00:08:06,089 Shirley, at 1,600 acres, 185 00:08:06,123 --> 00:08:08,091 you have the largest farm in the area, 186 00:08:08,109 --> 00:08:10,727 sharing borders with six other farms 187 00:08:10,745 --> 00:08:14,998 including my own farm and your nephew Dwight's. 188 00:08:16,300 --> 00:08:18,702 Okay. 189 00:08:21,456 --> 00:08:25,125 So... let's get it going. 190 00:08:25,159 --> 00:08:27,194 Would you want to do the honors? 191 00:08:27,228 --> 00:08:28,812 Oh, right, uh... 192 00:08:28,846 --> 00:08:30,881 you know, I-I don't think we have to do this. 193 00:08:30,915 --> 00:08:32,833 We Schrutes don't need some Harvard doctor 194 00:08:32,867 --> 00:08:35,302 to tell us who's alive and who's dead. 195 00:08:35,336 --> 00:08:39,289 But there was an unlucky streak of burying some heavy sleepers. 196 00:08:39,324 --> 00:08:41,975 And when grave robbers discovered some scratch marks 197 00:08:42,010 --> 00:08:44,394 on the inside of some of the coffins, 198 00:08:44,429 --> 00:08:48,215 we decided to make sure that our dead were completely dead... 199 00:08:48,249 --> 00:08:49,783 out of kindness. 200 00:08:53,204 --> 00:08:54,538 [Rifle cocks] 201 00:08:54,572 --> 00:08:55,572 [Gunshot] 202 00:08:56,658 --> 00:08:58,392 That's it for me. 203 00:08:59,861 --> 00:09:01,911 I don't think we should eat Packer's cupcakes. 204 00:09:01,929 --> 00:09:03,363 We can't give him the satisfaction. 205 00:09:03,398 --> 00:09:04,848 I agree. 206 00:09:04,866 --> 00:09:06,767 Even though that place has a way of making those cupcakes 207 00:09:06,801 --> 00:09:08,935 so they're dense but they're also really fluffy. 208 00:09:08,970 --> 00:09:11,304 We can't let him buy our forgiveness with cupcakes. 209 00:09:11,339 --> 00:09:13,223 He was awful to us. 210 00:09:13,257 --> 00:09:15,158 And he still is. 211 00:09:15,193 --> 00:09:17,394 How much is a cupcake, 2.50? 212 00:09:17,412 --> 00:09:18,829 Is that the price of our dignity? 213 00:09:18,863 --> 00:09:22,733 3.75 a cupcake actually, 3.67 if you buy a dozen. 214 00:09:22,767 --> 00:09:24,067 I never forget a number. 215 00:09:24,102 --> 00:09:25,986 Names, in one ear and out the other. 216 00:09:26,037 --> 00:09:29,723 Places, nope. Faces, that's rich. 217 00:09:29,757 --> 00:09:31,358 But numbers... 218 00:09:31,392 --> 00:09:33,527 I have a gift. 219 00:09:33,578 --> 00:09:35,729 I guess that's why I'm an accountant. 220 00:09:37,632 --> 00:09:38,999 Hey, man, I don't think we've met. 221 00:09:39,050 --> 00:09:40,917 - I'm Clark. - Oh, I'm Todd. 222 00:09:40,951 --> 00:09:44,888 Oh, sorry for calling you a fat little runt earlier. 223 00:09:44,922 --> 00:09:47,207 You didn't actually say that. 224 00:09:47,241 --> 00:09:48,575 - No? - No. 225 00:09:48,626 --> 00:09:50,210 Wow! 226 00:09:50,244 --> 00:09:51,694 I'm in this mode now 227 00:09:51,713 --> 00:09:53,146 where I'm apologizing for thoughts that are in my head. 228 00:09:53,181 --> 00:09:55,132 Hmm. [Forced chuckle] 229 00:09:55,166 --> 00:09:56,566 Hey! 230 00:09:56,600 --> 00:09:59,236 I have a crazy feeling... 231 00:09:59,270 --> 00:10:01,988 that you are really gonna like this. 232 00:10:02,023 --> 00:10:03,724 Maybe we should eat the cupcakes. 233 00:10:03,758 --> 00:10:05,842 Haven't we done enough to Packer? 234 00:10:05,860 --> 00:10:08,078 I mean, we sent him down to Florida on a prank, 235 00:10:08,112 --> 00:10:09,329 and you did fire him. 236 00:10:09,363 --> 00:10:10,697 I did. I did, yes. 237 00:10:10,748 --> 00:10:12,933 And it was purely political. He did nothing wrong. 238 00:10:12,967 --> 00:10:14,301 Would any of you be saying any of this 239 00:10:14,352 --> 00:10:15,786 if the cupcakes were from Supermart? 240 00:10:15,820 --> 00:10:17,571 Do they even have a bakery anymore? 241 00:10:17,605 --> 00:10:19,156 They do. It's awful! 242 00:10:19,190 --> 00:10:21,475 And it's getting worse every day. 243 00:10:21,509 --> 00:10:24,094 So it really is just about the cupcakes. 244 00:10:24,128 --> 00:10:25,762 Wow, you're right. 245 00:10:25,797 --> 00:10:27,848 It is just about the cupcakes. 246 00:10:27,882 --> 00:10:31,368 So we're all agreed no one touches those cupcakes? 247 00:10:32,186 --> 00:10:34,221 - Okay. - Okay. 248 00:10:34,272 --> 00:10:36,423 Packer can go to hell. 249 00:10:37,992 --> 00:10:41,211 Thank you for coming to my funeral. 250 00:10:41,245 --> 00:10:44,181 As I gaze at life's big sunset, 251 00:10:44,215 --> 00:10:47,417 I can't help but wonder where it all went wrong. 252 00:10:47,452 --> 00:10:50,821 You've all disappointed me greatly. 253 00:10:50,855 --> 00:10:53,540 Fanny, a single mama in the city. 254 00:10:53,574 --> 00:10:54,691 Thank you. 255 00:10:54,709 --> 00:10:57,043 Jeb, a street pusher. 256 00:10:57,095 --> 00:10:58,328 After I left the army, 257 00:10:58,346 --> 00:11:00,630 I bought a nine-acre worm farm 258 00:11:00,648 --> 00:11:01,915 from a Californian. 259 00:11:01,949 --> 00:11:04,901 Turns out, 260 00:11:04,936 --> 00:11:08,038 "worm" means something else out there, 261 00:11:08,072 --> 00:11:12,559 and I am now in the business of... 262 00:11:12,593 --> 00:11:14,878 pain management. 263 00:11:14,912 --> 00:11:19,049 Or the smoking of pain management. 264 00:11:19,083 --> 00:11:21,951 I can't stand the fact that Jeb is a pot farmer. 265 00:11:21,969 --> 00:11:23,804 He could've grown anything. 266 00:11:23,838 --> 00:11:25,755 Anything in the world. 267 00:11:25,789 --> 00:11:29,309 He used to talk about growing a peanut-grape hybrid. 268 00:11:29,343 --> 00:11:32,462 One plant, one sandwich. 269 00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:34,147 We can't just sit by 270 00:11:34,182 --> 00:11:37,300 and watch our family farm disappear. 271 00:11:37,318 --> 00:11:39,102 So here are my terms. 272 00:11:39,136 --> 00:11:40,970 Dwight, Fanny, Jeb. 273 00:11:40,988 --> 00:11:46,993 If you come back home, I will leave you my farm. 274 00:11:47,028 --> 00:11:49,663 - So there you have it. - Is she crazy? 275 00:11:49,697 --> 00:11:51,414 - Dwight? - Dwight? Buddy? 276 00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:52,699 - No, no, no. - Snap out of it. 277 00:11:52,750 --> 00:11:53,983 [Snapping fingers] Dwight! 278 00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:57,890 Let's do this. 279 00:11:57,891 --> 00:11:59,025 Let's run Aunt Shirley's farm. 280 00:11:59,059 --> 00:12:00,276 I'm in. Boom! 281 00:12:00,310 --> 00:12:01,661 No, no, no. I'm not moving back here. 282 00:12:01,695 --> 00:12:03,029 - Are you crazy? - Of course you are. 283 00:12:03,063 --> 00:12:05,114 Look, I don't wanna be mean or, like, insulting. 284 00:12:05,165 --> 00:12:06,582 I know that you like it here. 285 00:12:06,633 --> 00:12:09,952 But, Dwight, it's just that farm life lacks a certain... 286 00:12:09,987 --> 00:12:12,255 - sort of sophistication... - Oh, my God. 287 00:12:12,289 --> 00:12:13,639 That Cami and I are drawn to. 288 00:12:13,674 --> 00:12:15,007 and... [Sighs] 289 00:12:15,025 --> 00:12:17,827 I don't know, the men are just--[Sighs] 290 00:12:17,861 --> 00:12:21,731 It's almost like there's a-- a willing ignorance. 291 00:12:21,765 --> 00:12:23,783 Yes, I-- thank you for asking me. 292 00:12:23,817 --> 00:12:26,452 I actually have written a little bit of poetry. 293 00:12:26,470 --> 00:12:29,806 That's crazy. And I was recently published. 294 00:12:29,857 --> 00:12:31,491 Which is just-- 295 00:12:31,525 --> 00:12:32,825 maybe I have-- yep, I do. 296 00:12:32,859 --> 00:12:34,560 Here it is from the, um... 297 00:12:34,595 --> 00:12:37,447 hartfordwomenslitquarterly.com. 298 00:12:37,481 --> 00:12:38,781 [Sighs] 299 00:12:38,832 --> 00:12:41,484 A Willing Ignorance by Fanny Schrute. 300 00:12:41,518 --> 00:12:43,569 [Giggles] 301 00:12:43,604 --> 00:12:45,421 Totally. Yep. 302 00:12:45,456 --> 00:12:47,774 The people here are like... [Blows raspberry] 303 00:12:47,808 --> 00:12:49,559 like a fart. 304 00:12:49,593 --> 00:12:50,877 You know what I'm saying? Like a fart. 305 00:12:50,911 --> 00:12:51,994 You know what? 306 00:12:52,029 --> 00:12:53,329 Let's take a couple of nights 307 00:12:53,363 --> 00:12:55,732 and stay here and think about Aunt Shirley's offer. 308 00:12:55,766 --> 00:12:57,150 Couple of nights couldn't hurt. 309 00:12:57,184 --> 00:12:58,951 Oh, somehow I think a couple of nights could hurt. 310 00:12:58,986 --> 00:13:00,069 You will say yes on one. 311 00:13:00,120 --> 00:13:02,171 5, 4, 3, 2. 312 00:13:02,222 --> 00:13:03,806 Get ready to say yes. One! 313 00:13:03,857 --> 00:13:07,693 - Yes! - Absolutely! 314 00:13:07,711 --> 00:13:10,146 Growing up with Dwight and Mose was not easy. 315 00:13:10,180 --> 00:13:12,982 Uh, Dwight was obviously the cool one, 316 00:13:13,033 --> 00:13:15,034 and Mose was the visionary, 317 00:13:15,068 --> 00:13:18,671 which left me to be the comedian. 318 00:13:18,705 --> 00:13:19,906 - That doesn't work on me... - Okay. 319 00:13:19,940 --> 00:13:21,273 By the way. It's not-- 320 00:13:21,291 --> 00:13:23,976 Quatre, trois, deux, un. 321 00:13:24,011 --> 00:13:26,362 Oui on un. Oui, un! 322 00:13:26,396 --> 00:13:27,447 - Very clever. - Oui! 323 00:13:27,481 --> 00:13:28,731 - Okay. - Oui, mais oui. 324 00:13:28,782 --> 00:13:30,850 Oui, oui, oui. 325 00:13:30,884 --> 00:13:33,035 - Oui. - Oh, my goodness. 326 00:13:33,070 --> 00:13:36,606 ♪ When we arrive, sons and daughters ♪ 327 00:13:36,640 --> 00:13:40,009 ♪ we'll make our homes on the water ♪ 328 00:13:40,043 --> 00:13:41,444 ♪ we'll build our-- ♪ 329 00:13:41,478 --> 00:13:44,897 People underestimate the power of nostalgia. 330 00:13:44,915 --> 00:13:46,249 If baseball can use it 331 00:13:46,300 --> 00:13:48,167 to get people to care about that worthless sport, 332 00:13:48,185 --> 00:13:49,769 then I can use it to get my siblings 333 00:13:49,803 --> 00:13:51,671 to care about the farm. 334 00:13:51,705 --> 00:13:54,891 Nostalgia is truly one of the great human weaknesses. 335 00:13:54,925 --> 00:13:57,143 Second only to the neck. 336 00:13:57,177 --> 00:14:01,180 ♪ When we arrive, sons and daughters ♪ 337 00:14:01,215 --> 00:14:04,917 ♪ we'll make our homes on the water ♪ 338 00:14:04,935 --> 00:14:07,854 ♪ we'll build our walls aluminum ♪ 339 00:14:07,888 --> 00:14:11,474 ♪ we'll fill our mouths with cinnamon ♪ 340 00:14:11,508 --> 00:14:14,177 ♪ now ♪ 341 00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,685 So I forgot about this old custom. 342 00:14:22,719 --> 00:14:24,854 If a man is interested in courting a woman, 343 00:14:24,888 --> 00:14:28,574 he may throw the beaks of a crow... at her. 344 00:14:28,609 --> 00:14:31,327 And then if she's interested in accepting the courtship, 345 00:14:31,361 --> 00:14:34,614 she has to destroy the beaks. 346 00:14:41,338 --> 00:14:44,974 ♪ When we arrive, sons and daughters ♪ 347 00:14:45,008 --> 00:14:48,377 ♪ we'll make our homes on the water ♪ 348 00:14:48,412 --> 00:14:51,998 ♪ we'll build our walls aluminum ♪ 349 00:14:52,032 --> 00:14:55,151 ♪ we'll fill our mouths with cinnamon ♪ 350 00:14:55,185 --> 00:14:59,305 Hey, uh, I just wanna say I'm sorry for screwing you. 351 00:14:59,339 --> 00:15:01,357 I'm not sorry about it. 352 00:15:01,391 --> 00:15:03,993 I am. It was my rock bottom. 353 00:15:09,032 --> 00:15:12,117 - Kevin, you can do this. - You don't know that. 354 00:15:12,135 --> 00:15:15,054 Kevin, um, let's think of something to distract us. 355 00:15:15,088 --> 00:15:16,755 Like the movie Skyfall. 356 00:15:16,773 --> 00:15:18,474 You loved the movie Skyfall, right? 357 00:15:18,508 --> 00:15:20,042 Mm-hmm. 358 00:15:20,077 --> 00:15:21,577 James Bond was a spy. 359 00:15:21,612 --> 00:15:24,213 - Yes, he was a good spy. - Yeah. 360 00:15:24,264 --> 00:15:25,698 He was the best. 361 00:15:25,732 --> 00:15:28,367 James Bond would love this cupcake. 362 00:15:28,402 --> 00:15:29,669 Hey, you know what, 363 00:15:29,703 --> 00:15:32,521 it was great to see you all again. 364 00:15:32,556 --> 00:15:35,558 Take care. 365 00:15:37,644 --> 00:15:40,713 I am going through a 12-step program. 366 00:15:40,747 --> 00:15:43,299 I'm currently on step zero... 367 00:15:43,333 --> 00:15:46,319 which is have a shitload of fun. 368 00:15:46,353 --> 00:15:48,671 I spent six hours 369 00:15:48,705 --> 00:15:51,424 carefully removing the frosting 370 00:15:51,458 --> 00:15:53,542 and then layering in a variety of drugs, 371 00:15:53,594 --> 00:15:55,127 some legal, some not... 372 00:15:55,161 --> 00:15:58,281 some laxative, some constipating. 373 00:15:58,315 --> 00:16:01,317 You don't fire The Packman... 374 00:16:01,368 --> 00:16:03,970 and expect to get away with it. 375 00:16:04,004 --> 00:16:06,806 Guys, I'm proud of us. 376 00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:10,343 I think we did the right thing. Hey! 377 00:16:10,377 --> 00:16:12,378 - What, Pam? - Wait! 378 00:16:12,396 --> 00:16:14,480 He's gone. It's just a cupcake now. 379 00:16:14,514 --> 00:16:16,816 No, no! It's the principle of the thing. 380 00:16:16,850 --> 00:16:19,101 Oh, my God. 381 00:16:19,152 --> 00:16:21,854 I forgive him so much. 382 00:16:21,888 --> 00:16:23,572 [Gagging] 383 00:16:23,607 --> 00:16:25,658 - Whoa! Is he choking? - Kevin? 384 00:16:26,743 --> 00:16:28,327 [Coughing] 385 00:16:38,038 --> 00:16:40,272 Oh, that was fantastic. 386 00:16:47,530 --> 00:16:49,638 Is it dangerous to take the eggs in front of them? 387 00:16:49,673 --> 00:16:50,982 Yes, very. You really need to stand back. 388 00:16:51,033 --> 00:16:52,917 'Cause these are killer chickens. 389 00:16:52,951 --> 00:16:55,470 I was just asking you something I didn't know. 390 00:16:55,504 --> 00:16:57,822 Which is fine, and you learned something. 391 00:16:57,856 --> 00:16:59,290 But it was kind of a stupid question, 392 00:16:59,324 --> 00:17:01,292 so you're gonna get made fun of a little bit. 393 00:17:07,583 --> 00:17:09,884 Are we gonna eat these today? 394 00:17:09,918 --> 00:17:10,985 If you want. 395 00:17:15,207 --> 00:17:17,008 Is that a guillotine? 396 00:17:17,042 --> 00:17:18,392 This? No. 397 00:17:18,426 --> 00:17:19,827 That'd be cool though. 398 00:17:19,862 --> 00:17:22,513 It's for milking. 399 00:17:23,482 --> 00:17:26,551 That's a cow? 400 00:17:26,585 --> 00:17:28,319 Did you just ask me if this was a cow? 401 00:17:31,473 --> 00:17:32,990 What are you doing now? 402 00:17:33,025 --> 00:17:34,876 Come here. 403 00:17:34,910 --> 00:17:35,943 Come on. 404 00:17:35,978 --> 00:17:38,429 [Milk squirting into bucket] 405 00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:42,066 Grab a teat with each hand. Sit down. 406 00:17:43,619 --> 00:17:46,187 There you go. Squeeze from top to bottom. 407 00:17:46,221 --> 00:17:47,488 Really pull, use some muscle. 408 00:17:47,523 --> 00:17:50,708 Draw the milk out. All right, going all right? 409 00:17:50,742 --> 00:17:52,410 I don't know. 410 00:17:52,444 --> 00:17:56,597 Well, is the udder hot? Is the milk clumpy? 411 00:17:56,615 --> 00:17:58,399 - I don't know any of that. - Okay, you suck at this. 412 00:17:58,417 --> 00:18:01,702 Gimme those teats. [Clears throat] 413 00:18:02,654 --> 00:18:04,739 Didn't your father teach you anything? 414 00:18:04,773 --> 00:18:08,576 I never met him. 415 00:18:08,594 --> 00:18:10,511 Good morning, Erin. 416 00:18:10,546 --> 00:18:12,213 Hey. 417 00:18:15,601 --> 00:18:17,351 Hey, everybody. 418 00:18:17,385 --> 00:18:21,188 Um, I decided to eat my cupcake. 419 00:18:21,206 --> 00:18:22,390 I thought about it last night. 420 00:18:22,424 --> 00:18:23,758 I talked to Jim, I talked to my sister, 421 00:18:23,792 --> 00:18:27,028 and I think that as long as Todd Packer doesn't know, 422 00:18:27,062 --> 00:18:28,529 it's okay. 423 00:18:28,563 --> 00:18:31,165 I don't care what you do, Pam, just please stop making noise. 424 00:18:31,183 --> 00:18:32,233 Phyllis! 425 00:18:32,267 --> 00:18:33,985 Packer laced the cupcakes. 426 00:18:34,019 --> 00:18:35,236 No! 427 00:18:35,270 --> 00:18:36,937 Did you get diarrhea or were you stoned? 428 00:18:36,955 --> 00:18:39,206 - Some of us got both. - Oh, my God! 429 00:18:39,224 --> 00:18:40,541 Is everyone okay? 430 00:18:40,559 --> 00:18:42,760 Last night, I got out all of my old dolls 431 00:18:42,811 --> 00:18:44,779 and played with them on the living room floor. 432 00:18:44,813 --> 00:18:48,666 Then I ordered ten American Girl outfits on line. 433 00:18:48,717 --> 00:18:51,018 It was thousands of dollars. 434 00:18:51,053 --> 00:18:53,738 Well, count yourself lucky, Phyllis. 435 00:18:53,772 --> 00:18:55,573 [Whispering] I got the toilet. 436 00:18:55,624 --> 00:18:56,857 Me too. 437 00:18:56,875 --> 00:18:59,760 I went Christmas caroling... in March, 438 00:18:59,795 --> 00:19:01,812 and I fertilized some bushes along the way. 439 00:19:01,863 --> 00:19:03,731 So not my best night. 440 00:19:03,765 --> 00:19:05,499 But not my worst night. 441 00:19:05,534 --> 00:19:07,802 [Sighs] What did you do, Andy? 442 00:19:11,290 --> 00:19:12,506 Last night! 443 00:19:12,541 --> 00:19:14,075 Oh, God, um... 444 00:19:14,109 --> 00:19:17,061 I don't know. Noth-nothing, really. 445 00:19:17,095 --> 00:19:19,647 - Kevin? - Why would you ask me? 446 00:19:19,681 --> 00:19:21,499 No, I'm not a-- I just-- I don't know. 447 00:19:21,533 --> 00:19:23,117 [Both screaming] 448 00:19:23,151 --> 00:19:25,886 Oh... gosh, I actually-- 449 00:19:25,921 --> 00:19:28,422 it is hard to recall. 450 00:19:28,456 --> 00:19:32,326 Um, pretty normal night. 451 00:19:32,361 --> 00:19:36,047 My night was just like that... 452 00:19:36,081 --> 00:19:37,765 - Yup. - Okay. 453 00:19:37,799 --> 00:19:41,769 [Pants tearing] Meaning normal. 454 00:19:41,787 --> 00:19:43,738 Yeah, I didn't see you last night at all. 455 00:19:43,772 --> 00:19:45,773 Nope, I did not see you either. 456 00:19:45,791 --> 00:19:47,291 [Kevin groans loudly] 457 00:19:49,878 --> 00:19:53,147 Wow! He is officially the worst human being. 458 00:19:53,181 --> 00:19:55,683 Ah! 459 00:19:55,717 --> 00:19:57,551 But... Kevin, that's-- 460 00:19:57,569 --> 00:19:59,854 Yeah, no, I understand, Pam. 461 00:19:59,888 --> 00:20:01,388 I understand. 462 00:20:02,724 --> 00:20:03,991 No. Ohh. 463 00:20:04,026 --> 00:20:08,562 So that's it. I just wanted to make amends. 464 00:20:11,399 --> 00:20:13,584 - Wow. - That's big of you, man. 465 00:20:13,618 --> 00:20:14,952 Takes a lot of courage. 466 00:20:15,003 --> 00:20:17,538 Ooh. Red velvet. 467 00:20:17,572 --> 00:20:18,839 I should apologize too. 468 00:20:18,874 --> 00:20:20,791 It's okay. 469 00:20:20,842 --> 00:20:22,960 I'm over it. 470 00:20:38,060 --> 00:20:39,560 ♪ When we arrive, sons and daughters... ♪ 471 00:20:39,594 --> 00:20:43,647 Ooh, this is no nine-acre worm farm. 472 00:20:43,699 --> 00:20:45,649 This is a beast. 473 00:20:45,701 --> 00:20:47,768 Whoever's managing this thing is gonna have a hell of a job. 474 00:20:47,786 --> 00:20:49,320 Mm-hmm. 475 00:20:49,371 --> 00:20:52,323 - Not it. - Not it. 476 00:20:52,374 --> 00:20:54,075 It. 477 00:20:58,463 --> 00:21:00,247 If your kid doesn't put in some farm time, 478 00:21:00,281 --> 00:21:01,949 or he's gonna stay like that. 479 00:21:01,967 --> 00:21:03,283 [Chuckles] All right, fine. 480 00:21:06,652 --> 00:21:11,419 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com