1 00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,135 So... I'm happy to be here. 2 00:00:03,137 --> 00:00:05,170 It's very nice to see all of you. 3 00:00:05,172 --> 00:00:06,572 You're all looking well. 4 00:00:06,574 --> 00:00:08,374 Today's a Women in the Workplace thing. 5 00:00:08,376 --> 00:00:10,442 Jan's coming in from corporate 6 00:00:10,444 --> 00:00:12,878 to talk to all the women about, um... 7 00:00:14,414 --> 00:00:15,848 I don't really know what. 8 00:00:15,850 --> 00:00:17,683 But Michael's not allowed in. 9 00:00:17,685 --> 00:00:19,618 She said that about five times. 10 00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:23,255 Women today, though we have the same options as men, 11 00:00:23,257 --> 00:00:26,358 we often face a very different set of obstacles... 12 00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:28,394 in getting there, so... 13 00:00:28,396 --> 00:00:29,628 Hey, what's going on? 14 00:00:29,630 --> 00:00:31,230 Michael, I... Yeah, you know what? 15 00:00:31,232 --> 00:00:32,531 I thought we agreed... I thought about it. 16 00:00:32,533 --> 00:00:34,199 I just have few things I wanna say. 17 00:00:35,236 --> 00:00:36,402 What are you doing? 18 00:00:36,404 --> 00:00:37,703 Just hear me out. 19 00:00:37,705 --> 00:00:39,638 What is more important than quality? 20 00:00:39,640 --> 00:00:41,540 Equality. 21 00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:43,976 Now, studies show that today's woman, 22 00:00:43,978 --> 00:00:46,045 the Ally McBeal woman, as I call her, 23 00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:47,479 is at a crossroads. 24 00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,314 Michael... And... no, just, I... 25 00:00:49,316 --> 00:00:51,216 You have come a long way, baby. 26 00:00:51,218 --> 00:00:52,317 But I just... 27 00:00:52,319 --> 00:00:54,620 just wanna keep it within reason. 28 00:00:54,622 --> 00:00:56,121 They did this up in Albany... 29 00:00:56,123 --> 00:00:58,223 You are not allowed in... And they ended up turning the break room 30 00:00:58,225 --> 00:00:59,792 into a lactation room, which is disgusting. 31 00:00:59,794 --> 00:01:01,727 Now you're really not allowed in this session. 32 00:01:01,729 --> 00:01:03,128 Well, I'm their boss, so I feel like... 33 00:01:03,130 --> 00:01:04,696 I'm your boss. 34 00:01:09,536 --> 00:01:10,936 Anybody want any coffee or anything? 35 00:01:10,938 --> 00:01:11,937 We're fine, Michael. 36 00:01:11,939 --> 00:01:12,971 We just need you to leave, please. 37 00:01:12,973 --> 00:01:14,706 Women in the workplace. 38 00:01:14,708 --> 00:01:16,975 Yeah, translation: 39 00:01:16,977 --> 00:01:18,877 I have been banned from my own conference room 40 00:01:18,879 --> 00:01:21,080 so that Jan can talk in secret to all the girls. 41 00:01:21,082 --> 00:01:23,415 Oh, sorry. "Women of the Workplace." 42 00:01:23,417 --> 00:01:24,616 About what? I don't know. 43 00:01:24,618 --> 00:01:27,619 Clothes, me... 44 00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:28,720 Ick. 45 00:01:28,722 --> 00:01:30,522 Ladies, I am so, 46 00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:31,957 so sorry. 47 00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:34,526 Can we... start again? We were on such a roll. 48 00:01:34,528 --> 00:01:36,562 I-I really apologize for that. Jan. 49 00:01:36,564 --> 00:01:37,696 Yes, Pam? 50 00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:38,897 Michael's still at the door. 51 00:01:38,899 --> 00:01:40,099 Michael! 52 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:15,067 So one obstacle is how assertiveness 53 00:02:15,069 --> 00:02:17,503 is perceived differently in men and women. 54 00:02:17,505 --> 00:02:20,405 Men who are assertive tend to be admired. 55 00:02:20,407 --> 00:02:23,375 They're called... anyone? 56 00:02:23,377 --> 00:02:25,177 That's a terrible idea. 57 00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:26,845 What is? 58 00:02:26,847 --> 00:02:28,480 Them in there all together. 59 00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:29,948 They stay in there too long, 60 00:02:29,950 --> 00:02:32,718 they're gonna get on the same cycle. 61 00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:34,486 Wreak havoc on our plumbing. 62 00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:37,956 Everyone, guys... 63 00:02:37,958 --> 00:02:39,124 Circle up, please. 64 00:02:39,126 --> 00:02:41,193 Come on over. Bring your chairs. 65 00:02:41,195 --> 00:02:43,729 Toby, come on over. 66 00:02:43,731 --> 00:02:46,665 You're a guy... too. Sort of. 67 00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:48,800 Let's do this. 68 00:02:48,802 --> 00:02:50,269 Well, first of all, 69 00:02:50,271 --> 00:02:52,304 I, uh, just wanna warm up a little bit. 70 00:02:52,306 --> 00:02:53,338 Let's just clap. 71 00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:55,007 Let's just clap. Ready? 72 00:02:55,009 --> 00:02:57,009 Yeah! 73 00:02:57,011 --> 00:02:59,244 Yeah! That's what I'm talkin' about! 74 00:02:59,246 --> 00:03:00,846 I don't know what you're doing here, Michael. 75 00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:03,549 Just having a little guys in the workplace thing. 76 00:03:03,551 --> 00:03:06,852 Why can't boys play with dolls? 77 00:03:06,854 --> 00:03:10,022 Why does society 78 00:03:10,024 --> 00:03:12,457 force us to use urinals 79 00:03:12,459 --> 00:03:14,293 when sitting down is far more comfortable? 80 00:03:14,295 --> 00:03:16,061 Can you please do this somewhere else, Michael? 81 00:03:16,063 --> 00:03:17,763 We have nowhere else, Jan. 82 00:03:17,765 --> 00:03:19,064 This... 83 00:03:19,066 --> 00:03:20,532 We could do it in the warehouse. 84 00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:22,334 Dwight, excellent idea. Go to the warehouse. 85 00:03:22,336 --> 00:03:24,102 Okay, fine. Be actually perfect. 86 00:03:24,104 --> 00:03:25,404 Perfect! You know what? 87 00:03:25,406 --> 00:03:28,674 There is another side to this place, gentlemen. 88 00:03:28,676 --> 00:03:30,576 And I know we all love 89 00:03:30,578 --> 00:03:33,212 our cushy jobs and our fun, exciting office. 90 00:03:33,214 --> 00:03:35,214 But do you realize that underneath us 91 00:03:35,216 --> 00:03:36,715 there is another world. 92 00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:38,383 The warehouse world. 93 00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:41,653 A world that is teeming with sweat and dirt 94 00:03:41,655 --> 00:03:43,355 and life. 95 00:03:43,357 --> 00:03:45,324 Life. 96 00:03:45,326 --> 00:03:47,025 The bowels of the office. 97 00:03:47,027 --> 00:03:48,427 These guys are down there. 98 00:03:48,429 --> 00:03:51,196 They are real men doing real man's work. 99 00:03:51,198 --> 00:03:55,033 We are going to learn how a warehouse works. 100 00:03:57,036 --> 00:03:58,904 Oh, I think this is gonna work out great. 101 00:03:58,906 --> 00:04:01,506 Because managing the warehouse 102 00:04:01,508 --> 00:04:03,475 is a very important part of my job. 103 00:04:03,477 --> 00:04:05,877 And I haven't been there in months. 104 00:04:28,801 --> 00:04:32,838 Remember on Lost, when they met the Others? 105 00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:36,742 I'm so sorry about that. 106 00:04:36,744 --> 00:04:38,977 Um, so where were we? 107 00:04:38,979 --> 00:04:40,779 Pam, are you okay taking notes then? 108 00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:41,913 Mm-hmm. Please? 109 00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:44,016 Yeah. Thank you very much. 110 00:04:44,018 --> 00:04:45,784 So let's meet the warehouse! 111 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:48,387 Let's get some shots. 112 00:04:48,389 --> 00:04:50,122 Pan around there. 113 00:04:50,124 --> 00:04:53,392 This is Darrell, one of our warehouse staff. 114 00:04:53,394 --> 00:04:56,295 Darrell, what is your biggest fear? 115 00:04:56,297 --> 00:04:58,263 My biggest fear is that someone will distract us 116 00:04:58,265 --> 00:04:59,931 from getting all the shipments out on time. 117 00:04:59,933 --> 00:05:00,999 You know what? 118 00:05:01,001 --> 00:05:02,367 Darrell is actually the foreman here, 119 00:05:02,369 --> 00:05:04,636 and not Roy, which is cool. 120 00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:06,371 There's Roy, ridin' the big rig! 121 00:05:06,373 --> 00:05:08,674 Um, so Roy is actually going to be marrying Pam 122 00:05:08,676 --> 00:05:10,542 sometime this summer. 123 00:05:10,544 --> 00:05:12,878 And, uh, she's our receptionist. 124 00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:14,546 Sort of a BrAngelina thing. 125 00:05:14,548 --> 00:05:15,947 Why? 126 00:05:15,949 --> 00:05:19,117 BrAnangelina is the Brad Pitt and Angelina. 127 00:05:19,119 --> 00:05:21,086 I don't understand. Roy... Roy and Pam. 128 00:05:21,088 --> 00:05:22,454 It's a Ram. 129 00:05:22,456 --> 00:05:23,622 It's a Ram thing. 130 00:05:23,624 --> 00:05:26,925 I bet Roy heard about you liking Pam. 131 00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:28,093 I bet he'll try 132 00:05:28,095 --> 00:05:30,295 to beat you up. 133 00:05:30,297 --> 00:05:31,930 Thanks for the heads-up, Kev. 134 00:05:31,932 --> 00:05:34,366 I got your back if he does. 135 00:05:37,270 --> 00:05:39,104 But try to stay out of it. 136 00:05:40,374 --> 00:05:41,807 Just in case there's somebody down here 137 00:05:41,809 --> 00:05:43,008 who shouldn't be. 138 00:05:43,010 --> 00:05:44,543 A little Good Will Hunting situation. 139 00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:46,378 All right, troops. 140 00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:49,715 This is... an important day. A big day. 141 00:05:49,717 --> 00:05:51,750 Now, you may 142 00:05:51,752 --> 00:05:56,121 look around and see two groups here. 143 00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:57,856 White-collar, blue-collar. 144 00:05:57,858 --> 00:05:59,257 But I don't see it that way. 145 00:05:59,259 --> 00:06:00,325 And you know why not? 146 00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:03,795 Because I am collar-blind. 147 00:06:05,398 --> 00:06:06,832 Why don't we go around the table 148 00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:09,000 and all say something that we know we're good at. 149 00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:12,437 I will start. I am good at public speaking. 150 00:06:12,439 --> 00:06:14,740 Hi, I'm Meredith, and I'm an al... 151 00:06:14,742 --> 00:06:16,742 Good at supplier relations. 152 00:06:16,744 --> 00:06:18,210 Great. Phyllis. 153 00:06:18,212 --> 00:06:20,278 Um, I'm good at computer stuff. 154 00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:23,148 E-mails, um, spreadsheets, all that. 155 00:06:23,150 --> 00:06:24,149 Really? 156 00:06:24,151 --> 00:06:26,084 I don't know. I thought that... 157 00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,386 No, okay, stop. 158 00:06:27,388 --> 00:06:28,920 You know, I've seen some of your spreadsheets. 159 00:06:28,922 --> 00:06:30,021 And I almost always... Really? 160 00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:31,323 I thought they were pretty... 161 00:06:31,325 --> 00:06:33,225 I don't know how I fit in with these women. 162 00:06:33,227 --> 00:06:35,227 Here. 163 00:06:35,229 --> 00:06:36,928 Or with Jan. 164 00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:38,897 Um, I mean, we get along great. 165 00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:40,232 Fine. 166 00:06:40,234 --> 00:06:43,502 Um... I guess the person I have the most in common with 167 00:06:43,504 --> 00:06:45,303 is... 168 00:06:45,305 --> 00:06:47,005 Jim. 169 00:06:47,007 --> 00:06:48,340 Halpert. 170 00:06:48,342 --> 00:06:49,608 Hey, uh, 171 00:06:49,610 --> 00:06:50,709 I, uh, you know. 172 00:06:50,711 --> 00:06:52,577 Heard there's a rumor going around about, 173 00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:54,479 you know, you used to have a crush on Pam. 174 00:06:54,481 --> 00:06:55,514 Oh, no, no, no. 175 00:06:55,516 --> 00:06:56,748 No, no. No, it's cool. 176 00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:57,849 'Cause I know you're a good guy, 177 00:06:57,851 --> 00:06:58,884 and I know that that crush 178 00:06:58,886 --> 00:07:01,286 ended a long time ago, so, you know. 179 00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:02,821 We're cool, right? 180 00:07:02,823 --> 00:07:05,624 Yeah. No, yeah, definitely. 181 00:07:05,626 --> 00:07:06,758 You know, it's great with me, 182 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,026 'cause that way... 183 00:07:08,028 --> 00:07:09,461 I'm glad she has a friend at work 184 00:07:09,463 --> 00:07:10,662 she can get through the day with. 185 00:07:10,664 --> 00:07:12,164 That way she's not all, "Bah, bah, bah, bah," 186 00:07:12,166 --> 00:07:13,231 you know, when she gets home. 187 00:07:13,233 --> 00:07:14,966 Yeah, I like talking to her too. 188 00:07:14,968 --> 00:07:16,902 So, uh... we're cool, right? 189 00:07:16,904 --> 00:07:18,737 Yes. Yeah. 190 00:07:18,739 --> 00:07:19,771 Good. All right. 191 00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:21,540 Cool, man. Sweet. 192 00:07:28,915 --> 00:07:30,115 Hey, Mike, look. 193 00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:32,451 How about we go upstairs, too, you know? 194 00:07:32,453 --> 00:07:33,819 Learn how an office works. 195 00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:35,454 Oh, well... We can both switch places for the day. 196 00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:37,055 Okay, yeah, you know what? 197 00:07:37,057 --> 00:07:38,824 I don't... you're... 198 00:07:38,826 --> 00:07:40,358 My job sucks compared to this. 199 00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:42,227 I don't think you'd like it up there. Good experience. 200 00:07:42,229 --> 00:07:44,062 Guys! You wanna start unloading the truck? 201 00:07:45,998 --> 00:07:48,934 Okay, let's go. Step up. 202 00:07:48,936 --> 00:07:50,936 Check this out. 203 00:07:50,938 --> 00:07:52,838 Look at that. Look at that. 204 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:53,972 Ba boop! 205 00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:55,207 "Hello, how are..." 206 00:07:55,209 --> 00:07:56,575 Okay. 207 00:07:58,945 --> 00:08:00,745 That's great. 208 00:08:00,747 --> 00:08:02,547 That is good stuff. 209 00:08:02,549 --> 00:08:06,184 In five years, I'd like to be five years sober. 210 00:08:06,186 --> 00:08:08,286 That is an excellent goal. 211 00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:09,955 4 1/2. 212 00:08:09,957 --> 00:08:11,556 I'll tell you one thing. 213 00:08:11,558 --> 00:08:13,492 I am not gonna be one of those women 214 00:08:13,494 --> 00:08:15,727 schlepping her kids around in a minivan. 215 00:08:15,729 --> 00:08:17,529 Great. Uh-huh. 216 00:08:17,531 --> 00:08:20,365 I want an SUV with three rows of seats. 217 00:08:20,367 --> 00:08:21,867 That would be great. 218 00:08:21,869 --> 00:08:23,134 Well, I'll be honest. One of the goals 219 00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:24,336 of these women's seminars 220 00:08:24,338 --> 00:08:25,904 is to feel out if there's any standouts. 221 00:08:25,906 --> 00:08:28,740 Women who could be a valuable addition to our corporate life. 222 00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,513 Michael wants us to bond. 223 00:08:34,515 --> 00:08:36,114 So we need topics for conversation. 224 00:08:36,116 --> 00:08:37,716 Ponies. 225 00:08:37,718 --> 00:08:38,783 No. 226 00:08:38,785 --> 00:08:39,918 How about rainbows? 227 00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:41,286 No. 228 00:08:41,288 --> 00:08:42,387 Flowers. 229 00:08:42,389 --> 00:08:43,555 That's dangerous, Michael. 230 00:08:43,557 --> 00:08:44,723 Come on, get down from there. 231 00:08:44,725 --> 00:08:45,724 You're gonna hurt yourself. 232 00:08:45,726 --> 00:08:46,791 Mike... Stand clear. 233 00:08:46,793 --> 00:08:47,993 Mike, get off of the lift, please! 234 00:08:47,995 --> 00:08:49,127 I'm fine, I'm fine. Come on, now. 235 00:08:49,129 --> 00:08:50,595 I'm fine. 236 00:08:50,597 --> 00:08:53,431 Would you... look. 237 00:08:53,433 --> 00:08:55,033 Oh, oh, oh! 238 00:08:59,171 --> 00:09:00,772 We'll get somebody to clean that up. 239 00:09:00,774 --> 00:09:03,375 We're the ones that gotta clean that up! 240 00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:04,943 Damn it, Michael! 241 00:09:04,945 --> 00:09:08,480 We have to have this thing serviced. 242 00:09:08,482 --> 00:09:11,182 So, guys' gripe session. 243 00:09:11,184 --> 00:09:12,250 Here we are. 244 00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:13,685 Now, we definitely live 245 00:09:13,687 --> 00:09:15,921 in different worlds, 246 00:09:15,923 --> 00:09:18,123 but we have a lot in common. 247 00:09:18,125 --> 00:09:20,625 We even like the same girls, 248 00:09:20,627 --> 00:09:21,893 some of us. 249 00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:23,061 And that's gonna happen. 250 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:24,229 You know, we're guys. 251 00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:25,764 So... 252 00:09:25,766 --> 00:09:27,666 Hey... do you want me to go? 253 00:09:27,668 --> 00:09:29,868 No... why would I... 254 00:09:29,870 --> 00:09:31,002 You could... 255 00:09:31,004 --> 00:09:32,003 I'll go. 256 00:09:32,005 --> 00:09:33,305 Stay or... 257 00:09:35,007 --> 00:09:36,608 And a big, walk-in closet. 258 00:09:36,610 --> 00:09:38,009 Oh, that's part of my dream too. 259 00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:39,578 Oh, me too. 260 00:09:39,580 --> 00:09:41,713 Great. Okay. 261 00:09:41,715 --> 00:09:43,181 And, Pam, what about you? 262 00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:44,516 What is your dream? 263 00:09:44,518 --> 00:09:47,953 Well... I always dreamed of a house 264 00:09:47,955 --> 00:09:49,454 with a terrace upstairs. 265 00:09:49,456 --> 00:09:51,356 Plant flowers on it, stuff like that. 266 00:09:51,358 --> 00:09:54,225 Since I was a girl. 267 00:09:54,227 --> 00:09:55,260 Um... 268 00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:57,095 More seriously, though, 269 00:09:57,097 --> 00:09:59,164 a husband that I love. 270 00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:00,165 Roy. 271 00:10:00,167 --> 00:10:02,133 And... 272 00:10:02,135 --> 00:10:04,135 I love to draw. 273 00:10:04,137 --> 00:10:05,604 And I did a little in college. 274 00:10:05,606 --> 00:10:07,072 And I'd still love to do something 275 00:10:07,074 --> 00:10:09,774 where I could work with art or graphic design in some way. 276 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:10,976 She's real good. 277 00:10:10,978 --> 00:10:12,944 You know, the company is offering 278 00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:15,380 a design training program in New York. 279 00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:16,982 Well, I have a job right now. 280 00:10:16,984 --> 00:10:18,483 So I can't really take time off. 281 00:10:18,485 --> 00:10:19,884 Well, it's... it's only on weekends. 282 00:10:19,886 --> 00:10:21,386 And then a few weeks in New York. 283 00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:24,222 But I'm sure that I could ask corporate to help you out. 284 00:10:24,224 --> 00:10:25,357 Well, it's just that 285 00:10:25,359 --> 00:10:26,791 the weekends aren't good because, um... 286 00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:29,427 There are always a million reasons not to do something. 287 00:10:34,266 --> 00:10:35,734 Let's start with the warehouse. 288 00:10:35,736 --> 00:10:38,303 What bothers you as guys? You know? 289 00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:39,971 My priority is safety. 290 00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:41,006 Okay. 291 00:10:41,008 --> 00:10:42,374 So it really bothers me when somebody 292 00:10:42,376 --> 00:10:43,975 comes in here speeding around on a lift, 293 00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:45,110 playing with it like a toy. 294 00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:46,444 It kind of gets under my skin, okay? 295 00:10:46,446 --> 00:10:48,279 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shh, shh. 296 00:10:48,281 --> 00:10:49,481 Uh-uh, don't... don't shush me. 297 00:10:49,483 --> 00:10:50,882 I... that was just... 298 00:10:50,884 --> 00:10:52,117 That bothers me too. I was breathing. 299 00:10:52,119 --> 00:10:53,952 Pam shushes me. It drives me crazy. 300 00:10:53,954 --> 00:10:55,654 I hate shushing, you know? That's the thing. 301 00:10:55,656 --> 00:10:57,455 What b... okay. What is our... 302 00:10:57,457 --> 00:11:00,358 beef as... human men. 303 00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:02,227 You know, that's a good question, Hasselhoff. 304 00:11:04,731 --> 00:11:06,564 Okay. What bugs us? 305 00:11:06,566 --> 00:11:07,599 All right, good. 306 00:11:07,601 --> 00:11:09,200 Guys raggin' on each other. 307 00:11:09,202 --> 00:11:12,404 That's what guys do. And we love it. 308 00:11:12,406 --> 00:11:15,040 All right, let's talk about... 309 00:11:15,042 --> 00:11:16,474 clothing. 310 00:11:16,476 --> 00:11:18,343 I'm excited about today. 311 00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:20,578 I love girl talk. 312 00:11:20,580 --> 00:11:22,447 Dress for the job you want, 313 00:11:22,449 --> 00:11:24,015 not the job you have. 314 00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:25,350 All right, you can use your clothing 315 00:11:25,352 --> 00:11:26,985 to send a message about your ambitions 316 00:11:26,987 --> 00:11:30,655 by wearing clothes that reflect what you aspire to be. 317 00:11:30,657 --> 00:11:32,624 I'm not gaining anything from this seminar. 318 00:11:32,626 --> 00:11:34,459 I'm a professional woman. 319 00:11:34,461 --> 00:11:35,960 The head of accounting. 320 00:11:35,962 --> 00:11:38,430 I'm in the healthiest relationship of my life. 321 00:11:38,432 --> 00:11:41,800 I just think it's insulting that Jan thinks we need this. 322 00:11:41,802 --> 00:11:45,770 And apparently... judging from her outfit... 323 00:11:45,772 --> 00:11:47,806 Jan aspires to be a whore. 324 00:11:49,275 --> 00:11:50,775 I hate it when girls insist 325 00:11:50,777 --> 00:11:52,610 on taking them out to restaurants 326 00:11:52,612 --> 00:11:54,279 every weekend night, and then they're like, 327 00:11:54,281 --> 00:11:56,214 "When are we gonna go on a date date?" 328 00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:57,482 Oh, I hate that, too, man. 329 00:11:57,484 --> 00:11:58,583 Exactly! 330 00:11:58,585 --> 00:12:00,919 That sucks so hard. 331 00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:03,088 And then they make you drive 'em to church the next morning. 332 00:12:03,090 --> 00:12:05,857 Like, gas ain't free! 333 00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:07,926 Yeah, on our salaries, man, 334 00:12:07,928 --> 00:12:09,027 what do they expect, you know? 335 00:12:09,029 --> 00:12:10,462 What, "take us out every weekend"? 336 00:12:10,464 --> 00:12:11,663 You know what I mean? 337 00:12:11,665 --> 00:12:13,331 We're not millionaires. I feel you. 338 00:12:13,333 --> 00:12:14,733 No, you don't. You don't feel us. 339 00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:16,568 How can you? You... you know what? 340 00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:17,969 Not literally. 341 00:12:17,971 --> 00:12:19,170 You say we're the same, 342 00:12:19,172 --> 00:12:20,572 but we get compensated very differently. 343 00:12:20,574 --> 00:12:22,173 Yes. We work the same hours as you, 344 00:12:22,175 --> 00:12:23,942 and you just said we work a lot harder. 345 00:12:23,944 --> 00:12:25,577 Uh, you do, so... 346 00:12:25,579 --> 00:12:26,978 But we get paid a lot less. 347 00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:28,580 Nn... yy... Word. 348 00:12:28,582 --> 00:12:29,881 Like, next to no benefits. 349 00:12:29,883 --> 00:12:31,182 I know. God, what is that?! 350 00:12:31,184 --> 00:12:32,317 Exactly! 351 00:12:32,319 --> 00:12:34,085 It blows, it blows, man! 352 00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:35,220 You know, this would not happen 353 00:12:35,222 --> 00:12:36,354 if we had a union. 354 00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:37,789 That's what I'm talking about. 355 00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:40,258 Yeah... no. Absolutely, that's what we need. 356 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,260 Man, see, that's what I been sayin', man. 357 00:12:42,262 --> 00:12:43,995 We need to do this finally. 358 00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:45,396 You know what? Is that necessary? 359 00:12:45,398 --> 00:12:48,266 'Cause you already sort of have a union of guys. 360 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:49,768 It's more than necessary, Mike. 361 00:12:49,770 --> 00:12:52,771 We need this. Roy... you still have that card 362 00:12:52,773 --> 00:12:54,038 from the dock worker's union? 363 00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:55,673 Dock workers? Man, hook him up. 364 00:12:55,675 --> 00:12:56,741 Come on, man! 365 00:12:56,743 --> 00:12:58,042 Yeah. 366 00:12:58,044 --> 00:12:59,377 You know what, I think, uh... 367 00:12:59,379 --> 00:13:00,578 Problem is the chicks. 368 00:13:00,580 --> 00:13:02,680 Union, yeah! The problem is the chicks. 369 00:13:02,682 --> 00:13:04,682 And you gotta blame them. 370 00:13:06,385 --> 00:13:07,819 Are you with us, Mike? 371 00:13:07,821 --> 00:13:09,654 Yeah, s... 372 00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:11,556 Welcome to the warehouse. 373 00:13:11,558 --> 00:13:12,624 Mi-chael! 374 00:13:12,626 --> 00:13:15,593 Mi-chael! Mi-chael! Mi-chael! 375 00:13:16,762 --> 00:13:19,497 Another issue is inequality of pay 376 00:13:19,499 --> 00:13:20,865 between men and women. 377 00:13:20,867 --> 00:13:22,667 I'm sure that all of you have dealt with that before. 378 00:13:23,703 --> 00:13:24,736 This is important. 379 00:13:24,738 --> 00:13:25,770 Ladies, take a breather. 380 00:13:26,907 --> 00:13:28,640 Jan, I, uh... 381 00:13:28,642 --> 00:13:31,042 wanted... 382 00:13:31,044 --> 00:13:32,310 Can I help you? 383 00:13:34,079 --> 00:13:36,648 Um, I wanted to say that the guys downstairs 384 00:13:36,650 --> 00:13:38,383 are thinking about forming a union. 385 00:13:38,385 --> 00:13:40,285 And they have some good points. What? A union? 386 00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:41,452 Don't get hysterical. I'm not. 387 00:13:41,454 --> 00:13:44,689 Part of my job is knowing how to talk to women. 388 00:13:44,691 --> 00:13:47,725 Let's... be... rational... here. 389 00:13:47,727 --> 00:13:49,894 What are the pros, what are the cons? 390 00:13:49,896 --> 00:13:52,263 The cons are that everyone will lose their job, Michael. 391 00:13:52,265 --> 00:13:54,499 Everyone. Office, warehouse. 392 00:13:55,634 --> 00:13:58,770 What do you think the... pros... are... here? 393 00:13:58,772 --> 00:14:01,439 Don't talk to me that way, please. 394 00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:04,409 Just... they're gonna wanna hear this from you. 395 00:14:04,411 --> 00:14:06,044 Oh, you got yourself into this, Michael, 396 00:14:06,046 --> 00:14:08,413 so you get yourself out. Well, we're bonding down there. 397 00:14:08,415 --> 00:14:09,781 I just don't wanna have to tell them something 398 00:14:09,783 --> 00:14:10,815 they're not gonna wanna hear! 399 00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:11,950 Now who's getting hysterical? 400 00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:13,117 Okay... Come on Jan. 401 00:14:13,119 --> 00:14:14,452 After all we've been through. 402 00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:15,787 Michael, Michael... We have history. 403 00:14:15,789 --> 00:14:17,388 We have a history. Michael. 404 00:14:17,390 --> 00:14:18,590 Between us. 405 00:14:18,592 --> 00:14:20,291 Don't say another word. 406 00:14:20,293 --> 00:14:23,161 Get... yourself... down... stairs. 407 00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:24,495 I'm just saying that we have something... 408 00:14:24,497 --> 00:14:26,264 Okay, whatever. 409 00:14:28,634 --> 00:14:30,768 You know what? 410 00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:32,170 We could get this done a lot quicker 411 00:14:32,172 --> 00:14:33,972 if we formed a type of assembly line. 412 00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:37,375 This here is a run-out-the-clock situation. 413 00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:40,144 Just like upstairs. 414 00:14:40,146 --> 00:14:41,980 Sports metaphors 415 00:14:41,982 --> 00:14:43,281 are one of the ways women feel left out 416 00:14:43,283 --> 00:14:44,449 of the language of the office. 417 00:14:44,451 --> 00:14:46,017 Now, I know this might sound silly, 418 00:14:46,019 --> 00:14:47,619 but many women ask to go over it. 419 00:14:47,621 --> 00:14:49,721 So... fumble means... 420 00:14:49,723 --> 00:14:51,456 Mistake. Slip. Right. 421 00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:53,958 Par for the course is a golf term. 422 00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:55,693 It means right on track. 423 00:14:55,695 --> 00:14:58,529 Uh, below par means worse. 424 00:14:58,531 --> 00:15:00,865 Wait, that should mean better. That doesn't make sense. 425 00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:02,200 What about second base? 426 00:15:02,202 --> 00:15:05,970 Like if Michael said he got to second base with you? 427 00:15:05,972 --> 00:15:07,839 Does that mean you had closed a deal? 428 00:15:07,841 --> 00:15:09,073 Excuse me? 429 00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:11,242 I mean, that's a baseball term, right? 430 00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:13,311 I don't know what... Michael was... 431 00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:14,913 talking about, I don't know. 432 00:15:14,915 --> 00:15:16,314 Like, you went to Chili's, 433 00:15:16,316 --> 00:15:17,849 and he got to second base with you. 434 00:15:17,851 --> 00:15:19,183 Excuse me. 435 00:15:19,185 --> 00:15:20,752 Kelly, I don't know what Michael was talking about. 436 00:15:20,754 --> 00:15:23,354 He just told everybody, and I just wanna know... 437 00:15:23,356 --> 00:15:24,422 Hey. 438 00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:25,690 Hey! 439 00:15:25,692 --> 00:15:27,058 How's it going down there? 440 00:15:27,060 --> 00:15:28,593 It's a complete d... Well, actually, 441 00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:29,794 it's exactly what you'd expect, so... 442 00:15:29,796 --> 00:15:30,929 Right. 443 00:15:30,931 --> 00:15:32,096 How are the girls? Good. 444 00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:34,666 We watched a video about our changing bodies. 445 00:15:34,668 --> 00:15:35,900 Did you really? 446 00:15:35,902 --> 00:15:37,368 No. Oh. 447 00:15:37,370 --> 00:15:39,304 Almost. 448 00:15:39,306 --> 00:15:42,273 Um, but, hey, um... something kind of cool. 449 00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:44,742 There's this internship in graphic design 450 00:15:44,744 --> 00:15:46,477 that Jan was telling us about. 451 00:15:46,479 --> 00:15:48,980 She made it sound, like, really great. 452 00:15:48,982 --> 00:15:50,949 Nice. Well, what's it all about? 453 00:15:50,951 --> 00:15:52,850 I think you should do it. 454 00:15:52,852 --> 00:15:54,152 That's great. 455 00:15:54,154 --> 00:15:56,454 It's really cool. 456 00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:59,824 Cold front comin' in to the warehouse! 457 00:15:59,826 --> 00:16:01,326 Uh-oh! 458 00:16:01,328 --> 00:16:03,628 Better put on your ski boots! 459 00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:07,932 Wooooow! 460 00:16:07,934 --> 00:16:11,102 Happy New Year, Darrell! 461 00:16:11,104 --> 00:16:13,071 Hey, Darrell! 462 00:16:14,239 --> 00:16:16,174 You ever done this? 463 00:16:18,277 --> 00:16:19,577 Are you married? 464 00:16:19,579 --> 00:16:21,446 I'm divorced. 465 00:16:21,448 --> 00:16:23,348 That must have been hard. It was. 466 00:16:23,350 --> 00:16:24,649 Yes. 467 00:16:24,651 --> 00:16:26,584 You were probably feeling really depressed and sad, 468 00:16:26,586 --> 00:16:29,253 and that's why you did that thing with Michael. 469 00:16:29,255 --> 00:16:30,989 I think you should all spend a little more time 470 00:16:30,991 --> 00:16:33,491 thinking about your careers and less time on personal stuff. 471 00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:36,027 Mmm, I think we're all okay with the balance we've struck. 472 00:16:36,029 --> 00:16:37,695 At least you don't have kids. 473 00:16:37,697 --> 00:16:40,098 You have no kids, right? Thank God. 474 00:16:40,100 --> 00:16:43,001 Okay, let's take five. I think we could all use five. 475 00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:47,905 How can someone so beautiful be so sad? 476 00:16:50,776 --> 00:16:52,010 Hi. 477 00:16:52,012 --> 00:16:53,544 Did you take care of the situation? 478 00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:54,579 Yeah, yeah. 479 00:16:54,581 --> 00:16:57,382 Yes, I... I have... essentially... 480 00:16:57,384 --> 00:16:59,217 Excuse me. Excuse me. Yes, I've take... 481 00:16:59,219 --> 00:17:01,452 I'm told that there's been some interest 482 00:17:01,454 --> 00:17:03,688 in forming a union, and that Michael supported it. 483 00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:05,757 Obviously he's not a friend of yours, 484 00:17:05,759 --> 00:17:07,058 because he didn't tell you the facts. 485 00:17:07,060 --> 00:17:08,359 So let me. 486 00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:11,396 If there is even a whiff of unionizing in this branch, 487 00:17:11,398 --> 00:17:13,931 I can guarantee you the branch will be shut down like that. 488 00:17:13,933 --> 00:17:15,199 They unionized in Pittsfield, 489 00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:17,068 and we all know what happened in Pittsfield. 490 00:17:17,070 --> 00:17:19,504 It will cost each of you a fortune in legal fees 491 00:17:19,506 --> 00:17:21,272 and union dues, and that'll be nothing 492 00:17:21,274 --> 00:17:22,807 compared to the cost of losing your jobs. 493 00:17:22,809 --> 00:17:25,710 So I would think long and hard before 494 00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:27,478 sacrificing your savings and your futures 495 00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:29,781 just to send a message. 496 00:17:29,783 --> 00:17:31,149 If you have any further questions, 497 00:17:31,151 --> 00:17:32,717 you can direct them to... 498 00:17:34,486 --> 00:17:35,686 To Michael. 499 00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:42,026 Dreams are just that. They're dreams. 500 00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:44,062 They help get you through the day. 501 00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:45,396 Like the thing about the terrace. 502 00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,198 It's nice. 503 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:48,833 But, um... I don't know. 504 00:17:48,835 --> 00:17:51,335 It was just something I read in this book when I was 12. 505 00:17:51,337 --> 00:17:53,571 Uh, the girl in the book has a terrace 506 00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:55,006 outside of her bedroom. 507 00:17:55,008 --> 00:17:57,742 And she planted flowers on it. 508 00:17:57,744 --> 00:17:59,744 And I just loved that. 509 00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:01,813 Just always kind of stuck with me. 510 00:18:01,815 --> 00:18:04,348 So you're not doing it? 511 00:18:05,784 --> 00:18:07,518 How did you know? 512 00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:09,654 Why not? 513 00:18:09,656 --> 00:18:12,190 Just not... no big reason. 514 00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:13,291 Just a bunch of little reasons. 515 00:18:13,293 --> 00:18:15,126 Come on. 516 00:18:15,128 --> 00:18:16,661 Roy's right. 517 00:18:16,663 --> 00:18:18,529 There's no guarantee it's gonna lead to anything anyway. 518 00:18:18,531 --> 00:18:20,364 Roy said that? 519 00:18:20,366 --> 00:18:24,435 What? You have something you wanna say? 520 00:18:24,437 --> 00:18:29,040 You gotta take a chance on something sometime, Pam. 521 00:18:29,042 --> 00:18:32,076 I mean, do you wanna be a receptionist here, always? 522 00:18:32,078 --> 00:18:33,377 Oh, excuse me! 523 00:18:33,379 --> 00:18:35,146 I'm fine with my choices. 524 00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:37,415 You are? 525 00:18:38,083 --> 00:18:39,150 Yeah. 526 00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:41,886 It's impractical. 527 00:18:41,888 --> 00:18:45,256 I'm not gonna... try to get a house like that. 528 00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:48,459 Um, they don't even make houses like that in Scranton. 529 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:50,061 So I'm never gonna... 530 00:18:57,069 --> 00:18:58,870 Just gonna push this over there! 531 00:19:00,940 --> 00:19:03,141 This is not a good idea right here. 532 00:19:05,577 --> 00:19:07,578 Easy does it. Okay. 533 00:19:13,785 --> 00:19:15,153 Pizza. 534 00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:17,088 Great equalizer. 535 00:19:17,090 --> 00:19:19,891 Rich people love pizza. Poor people love pizza. 536 00:19:19,893 --> 00:19:22,360 White people love pizza. Black people love pizza. 537 00:19:23,729 --> 00:19:26,397 Do black people like pizza? 538 00:19:36,308 --> 00:19:39,410 Hey... um... 539 00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:40,745 Look, guys, I'm sorry. 540 00:19:40,747 --> 00:19:43,347 Sometimes, Jan... 541 00:19:43,349 --> 00:19:44,982 can be such a bitch. 542 00:19:47,620 --> 00:19:49,120 Hey, watch it. Watch it. 543 00:19:49,122 --> 00:19:50,788 We have a relationship. 544 00:19:50,790 --> 00:19:52,790 Thank you to our hosts. 545 00:19:52,792 --> 00:19:54,292 Hey, Michael! 546 00:19:54,294 --> 00:19:55,993 This ain't over. 547 00:20:03,802 --> 00:20:05,970 Excellent. 548 00:20:05,972 --> 00:20:07,338 Is it good to be back? Yeah. 549 00:20:07,340 --> 00:20:09,106 I mean, I love the guy stuff, but... 550 00:20:09,108 --> 00:20:11,542 to run an office, you need men and women. 551 00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:12,810 You know why? 552 00:20:12,812 --> 00:20:16,480 Because you need to have that crazy sexual tension 553 00:20:16,482 --> 00:20:18,516 to keep things interesting. 554 00:20:29,128 --> 00:20:31,662 Dunder-Mifflin. This is Pam. 555 00:20:33,198 --> 00:20:34,899 Uh, hold, please. 556 00:20:39,938 --> 00:20:42,673 Snow angel! Snow angel!