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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
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So, I'm happy to be here.
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It's very nice to see all of you.
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You're all looking well.
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Today's a Women in the Workplace thing.
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Jan's coming in from corporate,
to talk to all the women about...
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I don't really know what.
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But, Michael's not allowed in.
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She said that about five times.
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Women today, though we
have the same options as men,
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we often face a very
different set of obstacles...
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In getting there, so...
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- Hey, what's going on ?
- Michael, I...
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Yeah, you know what ? I just...
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I just have a few things I wanna say.
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- What are you doing ?
- Just hear me out.
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What is more important than quality ?
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Equality.
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Now, studies show that today's woman,
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the Ally McBeal woman,
as I call her, is at a crossroads.
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- Michael...
- And, no, just...
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You have come a long way, baby.
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But, I just wanna keep it within reason.
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- They did this up in Albany.
- You are not allowed,
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- in this session.
- And they...
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Into a lactation room,
which is disgusting.
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Now you're really not
allowed in this session.
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- I'm their boss, so I feel like...
- I'm your boss.
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- Anybody want any coffee ?
- We're fine, Michael.
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We just need you to leave please.
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Women in the Workplace.
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Yeah, translation, I have been banned
from my own conference room.
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So that Jan can talk in
secret to all the girls.
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Oh, sorry, "Women of the Workplace."
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About what ? I don't know.
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Clothes, me...
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Ladies, I am so, so sorry.
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Can we... start again ?
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- We were on such a roll. I really,
- Jan.
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- apologize for that.
- Yes, Pam.
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- Michael's still at the door.
- Michael!
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Season 2 Episode 15
"BOYS AND GIRLS"
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http://pmag.f2o.org/theofficeus/
http://www.forom.com
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So, one obstacle is
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how assertiveness is perceived
differently in men and women.
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Men, who are assertive
tend to be admired.
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They're called...anyone ?
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That's a terrible idea.
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What is ?
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Them, in there all together.
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They stay in there too long, they're
gonna get on the same cycle.
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Wreak havoc on our plumbing.
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Everyone, guys.
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Circle up, please.
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Come on over. Bring your chairs.
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Toby, come on over.
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You're a guy... too. Sort of.
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Let's do this.
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Well, first of all, I,
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just wanna warm up a little bit.
Let's just clap.
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Let's just clap, ready ?
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That's what I'm talking about!
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I don't know what you're
doing here, Michael.
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Just having a little "Guys in the
Workplace" kind of thing.
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Why can't boys play with dolls ?
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Why does society,
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force us to use urinals when sitting
down is far more comfortable ?
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Can you please do this
somewhere else, Michael ?
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We have no where else, Jan. This...
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We could do it in the warehouse.
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Dwigt. Excellent idea.
Go to the warehouse.
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Fine. Actually... Perfect.
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Perfect! You know what ?
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There is another side to
this place, gentlemen.
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And I know we all love our cushy
jobs and our fun, exciting office.
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But do you realize that underneath us,
there is another world.
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The warehouse world.
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A world that is teeming with sweat,
and dirt and life.
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Life.
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The bowels of the office.
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These guys are down there.
They are real men doing real man's work.
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We are going to learn
how a warehouse works.
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I think this is gonna work out great.
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Because managing the warehouse
is a very important part of my job.
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And I haven't been there in months.
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Remember on "Lost",
when they met the Others ?
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I'm so sorry about that.
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So where are we ?
Pam, are you okay taking notes then ?
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Please ? Thank you very much.
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So let's meet the warehouse !
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Let's get some shots.
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Pan around there.
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This is Darryl, one of our
warehouse staff.
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- Darryl, what is your biggest fear ?
- My biggest fear is that someone will
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distract us from getting
all the shipments out on time.
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Darryl is actually the foreman
here, and not Roy. Which is cool.
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There's Roy, ridin' the big rig!
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so Roy is actually going to be
marrying Pam sometime this summer.
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And, uh, she's our receptionist.
Sort of a BrAngelina thing.
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Why ?
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BrAngelina is the Brad
Pitt and Angelina.
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- I don't understand.
- Roy, Roy and Pam. It's a Ram.
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It's a Ram thing.
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I bet Roy heard about you liking Pam.
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I bet he'll try to beat you up.
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Thanks for the heads-up, Kev.
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I got your back if he does.
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But try to stay out of it.
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Just in case there's somebody down
here who shouldn't be.
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A little "Good Will Hunting" situation.
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All right, troops.
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This is an important day.
A big day.
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Now, you may look around
and see two groups here.
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White-collar, blue-collar.
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But I don't see it that way.
And you know why not ?
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Because I am collar-blind.
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Why don't we go around
the table and all say
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something that we know we're good at.
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I will start. I am good
at public speaking.
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Hi, I'm Meredith, and I'm an al
Good at supplier relations.
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Great. Phyllis.
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I'm good at computer stuff.
E-mails, spreadsheets, all that.
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Really ?
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- I don't know. I thought that...
- No, okay, stop.
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You know, I've seen some of your
spreadsheets. And I almost always...
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I don't know how I fit
in with these women.
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Here.
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Or with Jan.
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I mean, we get along great. Fine.
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I guess the person I have the
most in common with is.
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Jim.
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Halpert.
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Heard there's a rumor
going around about, you know
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you used to have a crush on Pam and...
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- Oh, no, no, no.
- No, no. It's cool.
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'Cause I know you're a good guy,
and I know that that crush
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ended a long time ago,
so, you know. We're cool, right ?
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Yeah. No, yeah, definitely.
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You know, it's great with
me, 'cause that way...
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I'm glad she has a friend at work
she can get through the day with.
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That way she's not all, "Bah, bah,"
you know, when she gets home.
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- I like talking to her too.
- So, we're cool, right ?
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- Yes, yeah.
- Good. All right.
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- Cool, man.
- Sweet.
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Hey, Mike, look. How about
we go upstairs, too ?
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- Learn how an office works.
- Oh, well...
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We can both switch places for the day.
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Yeah, you know what ? I don't, you're...
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My job sucks compared to this.
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I don't think you'd like it up there.
Guys !
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You wanna start unloading the truck ?
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Okay, let's go.
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Step up.
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Check this out. Look at that.
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Look at that.
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"Hello, how are"...
O-kay.
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That's great.
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That is good stuff.
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In five years, I'd like to be,
five years sober.
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That is an excellent goal.
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Four and a half.
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I'll tell you one thing. I am not
going to be one of those women
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schlepping her kids around in a minivan.
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Great.
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I want an SUV with three rows of seats.
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Well, I'll be honest. One of the
goals of these women seminars
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is to feel out if there's any standouts.
Women who could be valuable
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addition to our corporate life.
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Michael wants us to bond.
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So we need topics for conversation.
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- Ponies.
- No.
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How about rainbows ?
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- No.
- Flowers.
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- No.
- Make-up.
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Hey. You're gonna hurt yourself.
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- Stand clear.
- Mike, get off of the lift, please.
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- I'm fine, I'm fine. I m' fine
- Come on, now.
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Would you...look. Michael.
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We'll get somebody
to clean that up.
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We're da ones that gotta clean that up !
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Damn it, Michael !
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We have to have this thing serviced.
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So, guys gripe session.
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Here we are.
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Now, we definitely live
in different worlds,
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but we have a lot in common.
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We even like the same girls, some of us.
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And that's gonna happen.
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You know, we're guys. So...
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Hey... do you want me to go ?
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No... why would I... you could.
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- I'll go.
- Stay, or...
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And a big, walk-in closet.
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- That's part of my dream too.
- Oh, me too.
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Great. Great.
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And, Pam, what about you ?
What is your dream ?
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Well,
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I always dreamed of a
house with a terrace upstairs.
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Plant flowers on it, stuff like that.
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Since I was a girl.
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More seriously, though,
a husband that I love.
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Roy.
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And... I love to draw.
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And I, I did a little in college.
And I'd still love to do something,
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where I could work with art
or graphic design in some way.
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She's real good.
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You know, the company is offering
a design training program in New York.
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I have a job right now.
So I can't really take time off.
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It's, it's only on weekends.
And then a few weeks in New York
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But I'm sure that I could ask
corporate to help you out.
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It's just that the weekends
aren't good because...
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There's always a million
reasons not to do something.
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Let's start with the warehouse.
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What bothers you as guys ?
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- You know ?
- My priority is safety.
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Okay.
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So it really bothers me when somebody
comes in here speeding around on a lift,
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playing with it like a toy.
It kind of gets under my skin, okay ?
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- Don't-don't shush me.
- No, I...
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- That was just
- That bothers me too.
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- Pam shushes me, it drives me crazy.
- I hate shushing, you know ?
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That's the thing. What, okay.
What is our... beef as human men.
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You know, that's a good
question, Hasselhoff.
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- Okay. All right.
- What bugs us ?
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Good. Guys raggin' on each other.
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00:11:08,858 --> 00:11:11,692
That's what guys do.
And we love it.
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ll right, let's talk about... clothing.
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I'm excited about today.
I love girl talk.
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Dress for the job you want,
not the job you have.
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00:11:23,318 --> 00:11:26,081
You can use your clothing to send
a message about your ambitions
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00:11:26,215 --> 00:11:29,961
by wearing clothes that reflect
what you aspire to be.
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00:11:30,035 --> 00:11:32,061
I'm not gaining anything
from this seminar.
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00:11:32,198 --> 00:11:35,221
I'm a professional woman.
The head of accounting.
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I'm in the healthiest
relationship of my life.
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I just think it's insulting that
Jan thinks we need this.
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And apparently...
judging from her outfit...
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00:11:45,186 --> 00:11:47,953
Jan aspires to be a whore.
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00:11:48,465 --> 00:11:50,883
I hate it when girls insist
on taking them out
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to new restaurants every weekend
night, and then they're like,
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00:11:54,267 --> 00:11:56,012
"When are we gonna go
on a date date ?"
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00:11:56,496 --> 00:11:57,950
Exactly !
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00:11:58,077 --> 00:11:59,191
That's so hard.
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Yeah, and then they make you drive
'em to church the next morning.
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00:12:02,408 --> 00:12:04,431
Like, gas ain't free !
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00:12:05,915 --> 00:12:08,461
Yeah, on our salaries, man,
what do they expect, you know ?
247
00:12:08,506 --> 00:12:10,922
What, "take us out every weekend" ?
You know what I mean ?
248
00:12:10,965 --> 00:12:13,203
- We're not millionaires. No you don't.
- I feel you.
249
00:12:13,256 --> 00:12:15,733
You don't feel us. How can you ?
You-you know what ?
250
00:12:15,866 --> 00:12:17,631
- Not literally.
- You say we're the same,
251
00:12:17,715 --> 00:12:19,870
but we get compensated
very differently.
252
00:12:19,915 --> 00:12:21,581
- Yes.
- We work the same hours as you,
253
00:12:21,667 --> 00:12:23,252
And you just said we work a lot harder.
254
00:12:23,337 --> 00:12:26,671
- Uh, you do, so...
- But we get paid a lot less.
255
00:12:26,745 --> 00:12:28,742
- Word.
- Like, next to no benefits.
256
00:12:28,897 --> 00:12:30,840
I know. God, what is that ?!
257
00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:32,970
- Exactly!
- It blows, it blows, man!
258
00:12:33,048 --> 00:12:35,581
You know, this would not
happen if we had a union.
259
00:12:35,716 --> 00:12:37,681
- That's what I'm talking about.
- Yeah, no.
260
00:12:37,766 --> 00:12:40,052
- Absolutely, that's what we need.
- Man, see.
261
00:12:40,195 --> 00:12:41,682
That's what I been sayin', man.
262
00:12:41,815 --> 00:12:43,191
We need to do this finally.
263
00:12:43,666 --> 00:12:46,953
Is that necessary ? 'Cause you already
sort of have a union of guys.
264
00:12:47,205 --> 00:12:49,950
It's more than necessary,
Mike. We need this
265
00:12:50,097 --> 00:12:53,022
Roy, you still have that card
from the dock workers union ?
266
00:12:53,096 --> 00:12:55,793
- In my truck.
- Man, hook him up. Come on, man !
267
00:12:56,405 --> 00:12:59,581
Yeah. You know what, I think the
problem is the chicks.
268
00:12:59,815 --> 00:13:01,891
- Union, yeah !
- The problem is the chicks.
269
00:13:02,077 --> 00:13:04,611
And you gotta blame them.
270
00:13:05,748 --> 00:13:07,870
Are you with us, Mike ?
271
00:13:08,696 --> 00:13:10,313
Welcome to the warehouse.
272
00:13:14,946 --> 00:13:18,620
Another issue is inequality of
pay between men and women.
273
00:13:18,945 --> 00:13:21,460
I'm sure that all of you have
delt with that before.
274
00:13:21,688 --> 00:13:23,921
This is important.
Ladies, take a breather.
275
00:13:24,756 --> 00:13:28,822
Jan... I, wanted...
276
00:13:29,057 --> 00:13:30,950
Can I help you ?
277
00:13:32,678 --> 00:13:37,003
I wanted to say that the guys downstairs
are thinking about forming a union.
278
00:13:37,076 --> 00:13:39,552
- What ? A union. I'm not.
- And they have some good points.
279
00:13:39,608 --> 00:13:42,432
Part of my job is knowing
how to talk to women.
280
00:13:42,647 --> 00:13:45,541
Let's... be... rational... here.
281
00:13:46,335 --> 00:13:47,903
What are the pros, what are the cons ?
282
00:13:47,947 --> 00:13:50,680
The cons are that everyone will
lose their job, Micheal. Everyone.
283
00:13:50,807 --> 00:13:53,062
Office, warehouse.
284
00:13:53,225 --> 00:13:56,990
What do you think the...
pros... are... here ?
285
00:13:57,177 --> 00:13:59,893
Don't talk to me that way,
please. Just...
286
00:14:00,756 --> 00:14:02,400
They're gonna wanna
hear this from you.
287
00:14:02,477 --> 00:14:04,143
You got yourself into
this, Michael, so
288
00:14:04,576 --> 00:14:06,961
- Well, we're bonding down there.
- It's too bad.
289
00:14:07,037 --> 00:14:10,232
I just don't wanna have to tell them
something they're not gonna wanna hear !
290
00:14:10,338 --> 00:14:12,193
Come on, Jan.
After all we've been through.
291
00:14:12,286 --> 00:14:13,950
- Michael, Michael.
- We have a history.
292
00:14:14,077 --> 00:14:16,103
- Michael.
- We have a history. Between us.
293
00:14:16,178 --> 00:14:21,312
Don't say another word.
Get... yourself...downstairs.
294
00:14:21,715 --> 00:14:24,791
I'm just saying that we have
something... okay, whatever.
295
00:14:26,747 --> 00:14:28,252
You know what ?
296
00:14:28,427 --> 00:14:31,592
We could get this done a lot quicker
if we formed a type of assembly line.
297
00:14:31,745 --> 00:14:35,411
This here is a
run-out-the-clock situation.
298
00:14:35,597 --> 00:14:37,641
Just like upstairs.
299
00:14:38,418 --> 00:14:41,201
Sports metaphors are one
of the ways women feel left out
300
00:14:41,255 --> 00:14:44,002
of the language of the office.
Now, I know this might sound silly,
301
00:14:44,117 --> 00:14:47,121
but many women ask to go over it.
So... fumble means...
302
00:14:47,187 --> 00:14:48,672
- Mistake.
- Slip.
303
00:14:48,767 --> 00:14:49,560
Right.
304
00:14:49,716 --> 00:14:53,292
Par for the course is a golf term,
it means right on track.
305
00:14:54,265 --> 00:14:58,932
Below par means worse.
Wait. That's doesn't make sense.
306
00:14:59,006 --> 00:15:00,621
What about second base ?
307
00:15:00,685 --> 00:15:04,010
Like if Michael said
he got to second base with you ?
308
00:15:04,235 --> 00:15:06,702
- Does that mean he closed the deal ?
- Excuse me ?
309
00:15:06,877 --> 00:15:09,901
- I mean, that's a baseball term, right ?
- I don't know what.
310
00:15:09,985 --> 00:15:13,191
Michael was... talking about
311
00:15:21,287 --> 00:15:23,081
- Hey.
- Hey!
312
00:15:23,495 --> 00:15:24,731
How's it going down there ?
313
00:15:24,828 --> 00:15:28,310
It's a complete. Well, actually it's
exactly what you'd expect, so...
314
00:15:28,676 --> 00:15:30,293
- How are the girls ?
- Good.
315
00:15:30,397 --> 00:15:32,863
We watched a video
about our changing bodies.
316
00:15:33,086 --> 00:15:35,533
- Did you really ?
- No.
317
00:15:35,678 --> 00:15:36,850
Almost.
318
00:15:39,328 --> 00:15:42,512
Something kind of cool. There's this
internship in graphic design
319
00:15:42,628 --> 00:15:46,652
that Jan was telling us about.
She made it sound, like, really great.
320
00:15:47,047 --> 00:15:48,952
Nice. Well, what's it all about ?
321
00:15:49,057 --> 00:15:51,833
I think you should do it.
That's great!
322
00:15:52,757 --> 00:15:54,192
It's really cool.
323
00:15:54,335 --> 00:15:57,753
Cold front comin' in to the warehouse !
324
00:15:59,295 --> 00:16:01,241
Better put on your ski boots !
325
00:16:05,828 --> 00:16:08,133
Happy New Year Darryl !
326
00:16:09,367 --> 00:16:11,620
Hey, Darryl!
327
00:16:12,148 --> 00:16:14,452
You ever done this ?
328
00:16:16,548 --> 00:16:17,782
Are you married ?
329
00:16:18,346 --> 00:16:20,602
- I'm divorced.
- That must have been hard.
330
00:16:20,695 --> 00:16:21,822
It was. Yes.
331
00:16:21,845 --> 00:16:24,311
You were probably feeling
really depressed and sad.
332
00:16:24,497 --> 00:16:26,803
And that's why you did
that thing with Michael.
333
00:16:26,835 --> 00:16:29,653
I think you should all spend a little
more time about your careers
334
00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,700
and less time on personal stuff.
335
00:16:31,786 --> 00:16:34,131
I think we're all okay with
the balance we've struck.
336
00:16:34,267 --> 00:16:36,780
At least you don't have kids.
You have no kids, right ?
337
00:16:36,937 --> 00:16:38,060
- Thank God.
- Okay
338
00:16:38,196 --> 00:16:40,602
Let's take five.
I think we could all use five.
339
00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:45,733
How can someone so beautiful be so sad ?
340
00:16:48,936 --> 00:16:50,941
- Hi.
- Did you take care of the situation ?
341
00:16:51,107 --> 00:16:52,930
Yeah, yeah. Yes.
342
00:16:53,256 --> 00:16:55,620
- I... I have... essentially
- Excuse me.
343
00:16:55,955 --> 00:16:57,472
- Yes, I've taken...
- Excuse me.
344
00:16:57,487 --> 00:17:00,280
I'm told that there's been some
interest in forming a union.
345
00:17:00,388 --> 00:17:01,913
And that Michael supported it.
346
00:17:02,026 --> 00:17:03,531
Obviously he's not a friend of yours,
347
00:17:03,635 --> 00:17:06,172
because he didn't tell you the facts
So let me.
348
00:17:06,307 --> 00:17:09,050
If there is even a whiff of
unionizing in this branch,
349
00:17:09,136 --> 00:17:11,882
I can guarantee you the branch
will be shut down like that.
350
00:17:12,037 --> 00:17:15,080
They unionized in Pittsfield, and we
all know what happened in Pittsfield.
351
00:17:15,218 --> 00:17:17,721
It will cost each of you
a fortune in legal fees.
352
00:17:17,908 --> 00:17:20,931
Union dues, and that'll be nothing
compared to the cost of losing your jobs.
353
00:17:20,996 --> 00:17:24,762
So I would think long and hard
before sacrificing your savings
354
00:17:24,818 --> 00:17:27,491
and your futures just to send a message.
355
00:17:27,995 --> 00:17:30,900
If you have any further questions,
you can direct them to...
356
00:17:32,795 --> 00:17:34,230
to Michael.
357
00:17:37,366 --> 00:17:38,901
Dreams are just that.
358
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:41,942
They're dreams.
They help get you through the day.
359
00:17:42,375 --> 00:17:44,743
Like the thing about
the terrace. It's nice.
360
00:17:44,898 --> 00:17:46,183
But, um...
361
00:17:46,545 --> 00:17:49,593
I don't know. It was just something
I read in this book when I was 12.
362
00:17:49,905 --> 00:17:53,960
The girl in the book has a
terrace outside of her bedroom...
363
00:17:54,106 --> 00:17:57,622
And she planted flowers on it.
And I just loved that.
364
00:17:58,056 --> 00:18:00,241
Just always kind of stuck with me.
365
00:18:00,337 --> 00:18:02,600
So, you're not doing it.
366
00:18:04,087 --> 00:18:06,031
How did you know ?
367
00:18:06,286 --> 00:18:07,460
Why not ?
368
00:18:07,485 --> 00:18:10,001
Just not... no big reason.
369
00:18:10,156 --> 00:18:12,873
- Just a bunch of little reasons.
- Come on.
370
00:18:13,647 --> 00:18:16,601
Roy's right. There's no guarantee
it's gonna lead to anything anyway.
371
00:18:16,956 --> 00:18:18,692
Roy said that ?
372
00:18:19,905 --> 00:18:22,191
What ? You have something
you wanna say ?
373
00:18:23,695 --> 00:18:27,162
You gotta take a chance
on something sometime, Pam.
374
00:18:27,705 --> 00:18:30,231
I mean, do you wanna be a
receptionist here, always ?
375
00:18:30,397 --> 00:18:33,062
Oh, excuse me!
I'm fine with my choices.
376
00:18:34,445 --> 00:18:35,831
You are ?
377
00:18:36,175 --> 00:18:37,350
Yeah.
378
00:18:38,408 --> 00:18:39,661
It's impractical.
379
00:18:39,765 --> 00:18:43,410
I'm not gonna...
try to get a house like that.
380
00:18:43,928 --> 00:18:46,032
They don't even make
houses like that in Scranton.
381
00:18:46,217 --> 00:18:48,513
So I'm never gonna...
382
00:18:55,545 --> 00:18:58,162
Just gonna push this over there!
383
00:18:59,288 --> 00:19:01,952
This is not a good idea right here.
384
00:19:04,135 --> 00:19:06,260
Easy does it, okay.
385
00:19:11,936 --> 00:19:13,420
Pizza.
386
00:19:13,497 --> 00:19:15,753
Great equalizer.
387
00:19:15,846 --> 00:19:18,333
Rich people love pizza.
Poor people love pizza.
388
00:19:18,465 --> 00:19:20,780
White people love pizza.
Black people love pizza.
389
00:19:22,147 --> 00:19:24,020
Do black people like pizza ?
390
00:19:34,725 --> 00:19:35,772
Hey.
391
00:19:37,648 --> 00:19:39,872
Look guys, I'm sorry.
392
00:19:40,187 --> 00:19:43,343
Sometimes, Jan... can be such a bitch.
393
00:19:45,145 --> 00:19:48,673
Hey, watch it, watch it.
We have a relationship.
394
00:19:49,168 --> 00:19:50,830
Thank you to our host.
395
00:19:51,005 --> 00:19:52,540
Hey Michael !
396
00:19:52,798 --> 00:19:55,003
This ain't over.
397
00:20:02,907 --> 00:20:03,900
Excellent.
398
00:20:03,977 --> 00:20:07,702
Is it good to be back ? Yeah. I mean,
I love the guy stuff, But...
399
00:20:07,888 --> 00:20:10,013
To run an office,
you need men and women.
400
00:20:10,137 --> 00:20:12,932
You know why ? Because you need to have
401
00:20:13,028 --> 00:20:16,162
that crazy sexual tension
to keep things interesting.
402
00:20:27,476 --> 00:20:29,733
Dunder-Mifflin, this is Pam.
403
00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:33,260
Hold please.