1 00:00:02,401 --> 00:00:06,462 There is nothing wrong, nor will there ever be wrong, 2 00:00:06,538 --> 00:00:08,472 with any Sabre printers. 3 00:00:08,540 --> 00:00:09,564 Case closed. 4 00:00:12,110 --> 00:00:14,203 Michael Scott, as seen on TV. 5 00:00:14,279 --> 00:00:18,238 I saw you on the news and I want to pinch your tiny wiener. 6 00:00:18,316 --> 00:00:19,840 Oh, my God. 7 00:00:19,918 --> 00:00:21,078 It's Packer. 8 00:00:21,186 --> 00:00:24,553 Oh! Pac-Man, I thought you were a girl. 9 00:00:24,623 --> 00:00:27,319 Apparently, there are allegations 10 00:00:27,392 --> 00:00:29,826 that Sabre printers can cause a fire. 11 00:00:30,395 --> 00:00:33,523 So, they asked me to give a statement to the press. 12 00:00:33,598 --> 00:00:36,328 I'm like, "What? All right." 13 00:00:36,668 --> 00:00:38,067 So, I do it. 14 00:00:38,136 --> 00:00:42,038 It's on TV last night, and it's in the paper today, 15 00:00:42,107 --> 00:00:43,631 and it's online. 16 00:00:43,708 --> 00:00:47,735 And then I call Froggy 98.7, their request line. 17 00:00:47,813 --> 00:00:49,644 I talked to the host about it on the air. 18 00:00:49,714 --> 00:00:52,410 It's like, "Come on, people, enough." 19 00:00:52,918 --> 00:00:55,011 Everybody, we are at DEFCON 5. 20 00:00:55,086 --> 00:00:58,249 I am officially the second most watched clip of the day 21 00:00:58,323 --> 00:01:00,188 on the WBRE news site. 22 00:01:00,258 --> 00:01:01,247 What's number one? 23 00:01:01,326 --> 00:01:04,295 Oh? That teacher who was wrongfully accused of being a pedophile. 24 00:01:04,362 --> 00:01:07,525 Now, we cannot let the pedophile win again. 25 00:01:07,899 --> 00:01:11,391 I would like you all to go to the Web site and watch my clip 11 times. 26 00:01:11,470 --> 00:01:12,994 So, instead of working, you want... Yes. 27 00:01:13,071 --> 00:01:14,436 Okay. Yes. 28 00:01:14,506 --> 00:01:15,734 Come on. 29 00:01:16,875 --> 00:01:20,971 Get it up. That's what... Let's do it. 30 00:01:21,947 --> 00:01:24,006 Oh! Did you see this report 31 00:01:24,082 --> 00:01:25,879 that the zoo got a baby otter? 32 00:01:26,051 --> 00:01:27,177 It's on the same site. 33 00:01:27,252 --> 00:01:29,482 Aw! It's kissing its mommy. 34 00:01:29,554 --> 00:01:30,782 Please. Michael, you have to see this. 35 00:01:30,856 --> 00:01:32,448 This is, like, the cutest thing ever. 36 00:01:34,192 --> 00:01:39,425 Really? A baby otter? Okay, count me in as "Who cares?" 37 00:01:39,698 --> 00:01:42,690 It's not even that interesting, the baby otter. 38 00:01:43,001 --> 00:01:45,128 It can't even stand up. 39 00:01:45,203 --> 00:01:46,830 It's trying to stand up. 40 00:01:49,741 --> 00:01:51,231 There he goes. 41 00:02:17,836 --> 00:02:19,235 Howdy. 42 00:02:20,272 --> 00:02:22,206 I hope I'm not interrupting anything. 43 00:02:22,274 --> 00:02:24,333 Jo, we were not expecting you. 44 00:02:24,409 --> 00:02:26,104 But you all no doubt know why I'm here. 45 00:02:26,177 --> 00:02:28,873 No. Turns out our printers are famous. 46 00:02:29,748 --> 00:02:31,648 They're all over the news. 47 00:02:31,917 --> 00:02:33,179 It's an interesting story. 48 00:02:34,119 --> 00:02:36,587 Cheap, foreign printers 49 00:02:37,088 --> 00:02:38,783 attacking innocent Americans. 50 00:02:39,190 --> 00:02:42,421 Well, actually the real story isn't quite as racy. 51 00:02:43,161 --> 00:02:44,219 But 52 00:02:47,065 --> 00:02:48,225 let's give it a go. 53 00:02:48,466 --> 00:02:50,661 Jo, I think that I know what happened. 54 00:02:51,236 --> 00:02:53,136 I'm not sure you do, teddy bear. 55 00:02:53,471 --> 00:02:55,530 Well, now I think I might not. 56 00:02:56,308 --> 00:02:59,402 Not long ago, we discovered a defect in one of our printers. 57 00:02:59,477 --> 00:03:01,911 So, we got a software patch, fixed it right up. 58 00:03:01,980 --> 00:03:03,242 Just like that. 59 00:03:03,315 --> 00:03:04,714 I don't know how it works. 60 00:03:05,684 --> 00:03:07,982 Just as we were about to 61 00:03:08,053 --> 00:03:10,544 send out a letter to our affected customers, 62 00:03:10,722 --> 00:03:14,123 giving them free toner, and we keep them happy. 63 00:03:14,526 --> 00:03:16,960 But somebody here, they liked that first story better. 64 00:03:17,228 --> 00:03:19,287 The one where we lose half our clients 65 00:03:19,497 --> 00:03:21,522 For no damn good reason! 66 00:03:23,335 --> 00:03:27,203 Whoever it was who talked to the press, just come forward, please. 67 00:03:27,372 --> 00:03:28,361 Jo, 68 00:03:28,607 --> 00:03:30,165 I can assure you it was no one in this office. 69 00:03:30,542 --> 00:03:32,237 Can you, now? Absolutely. 70 00:03:32,377 --> 00:03:34,504 Anyone who talked to the press, please raise your hand. 71 00:03:37,148 --> 00:03:38,445 Put your hand up, Norma Rae. 72 00:03:38,917 --> 00:03:41,681 If you say anything, so help me God, 73 00:03:41,753 --> 00:03:43,345 I'll break off the temples of your glasses 74 00:03:43,421 --> 00:03:44,945 and stick them in your eye sockets. 75 00:03:45,023 --> 00:03:46,388 So unfair. 76 00:03:46,591 --> 00:03:49,890 Even if I thought that our printers killed baby seals, 77 00:03:49,961 --> 00:03:52,293 I would not be a whistleblower. 78 00:03:52,364 --> 00:03:55,959 The Bernards, for generations, have silenced whistleblowers. 79 00:03:56,034 --> 00:03:58,025 It's how we made all our money. 80 00:03:58,103 --> 00:03:59,900 Woody Guthrie wrote a song about us. 81 00:04:00,872 --> 00:04:02,703 Old Mister Bernard 82 00:04:02,774 --> 00:04:04,503 Old Mister Bernard 83 00:04:04,843 --> 00:04:07,744 Who have you silenced today? 84 00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:10,838 It's a little form. Says, "I did not do it." 85 00:04:11,182 --> 00:04:13,116 There is no reason for anyone here to sign this 86 00:04:13,184 --> 00:04:15,618 because I know everything there is to know about these people. 87 00:04:15,987 --> 00:04:17,511 I know when their birthdays are, 88 00:04:17,589 --> 00:04:19,056 I know what their favorite kind of cake is, 89 00:04:19,124 --> 00:04:20,614 I know what color streamers they like. 90 00:04:21,526 --> 00:04:23,118 All that's just birthday information, Michael. 91 00:04:23,194 --> 00:04:25,719 Yes, yes, but it shows a bigger picture. 92 00:04:25,797 --> 00:04:27,196 Why don't you come with me? 93 00:04:27,365 --> 00:04:29,595 We'll start out with the honcho, what d'you say? 94 00:04:29,668 --> 00:04:30,760 Okay. 95 00:04:31,102 --> 00:04:33,195 When Mama was working as a prison guard, 96 00:04:33,271 --> 00:04:36,331 and something went missing, she'd ask one question, 97 00:04:37,075 --> 00:04:39,475 "What do we do when we find the guilty party?" 98 00:04:39,811 --> 00:04:41,608 And if they said, "Come down on them 99 00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:44,740 "with that swift hammer of justice," innocent. 100 00:04:45,483 --> 00:04:47,917 A clear conscience don't need no mercy. 101 00:04:48,553 --> 00:04:52,751 But if they said, "Officer Bessie, well, they may have had a reason." 102 00:04:52,824 --> 00:04:54,724 Blah, blah, blah, blah... 103 00:04:54,926 --> 00:04:58,327 Well, nine times out of 10, that's the anus they checked. 104 00:04:58,897 --> 00:05:00,762 So, say we catch this whistleblower. 105 00:05:00,832 --> 00:05:02,026 What do you think I should do with them? 106 00:05:02,100 --> 00:05:05,001 We should give them a one-way ticket to Montego Bay. 107 00:05:05,737 --> 00:05:07,329 Where they keep all the al-Qaeda. 108 00:05:08,740 --> 00:05:12,506 Uh, that's Guantanamo Bay. Yes. 109 00:05:12,744 --> 00:05:14,006 You put them in jail for a long time, 110 00:05:14,079 --> 00:05:15,944 you put them in jail for as long as you can. 111 00:05:16,014 --> 00:05:17,641 Well, I guess we're all right, Michael. 112 00:05:17,982 --> 00:05:20,382 I want these people to really pay. I want them to suffer. 113 00:05:21,086 --> 00:05:23,111 I'd prefer it if they died. 114 00:05:23,188 --> 00:05:24,212 Because it's not right. 115 00:05:24,289 --> 00:05:25,381 Yeah. Okay. 116 00:05:25,557 --> 00:05:27,525 Hey, Dwight. Hey, IT guy. 117 00:05:27,892 --> 00:05:29,450 You mind if I get in there for a second? 118 00:05:29,527 --> 00:05:30,892 Oh, sure thing, go ahead. 119 00:05:32,964 --> 00:05:34,955 Just... 120 00:05:35,033 --> 00:05:36,398 Dwight, what the hell? 121 00:05:36,468 --> 00:05:38,629 Apache persuasion hold, that's the hell. 122 00:05:38,703 --> 00:05:39,829 What are you doing to my computer? 123 00:05:39,904 --> 00:05:43,203 The lawyers are searching our hard drives for information on the leak. 124 00:05:43,408 --> 00:05:44,397 Thanks a lot, Big Brother. 125 00:05:44,476 --> 00:05:45,602 You're with Big Brother? 126 00:05:45,677 --> 00:05:47,440 Okay, go ahead. I got nothing to hide. 127 00:05:47,979 --> 00:05:49,378 Wait, are they searching all our computers? 128 00:05:49,447 --> 00:05:50,505 Yeah. 129 00:05:51,116 --> 00:05:53,209 I already got to yours, Kev. 130 00:05:56,054 --> 00:05:59,217 No, that's cool. Sometimes I run. 131 00:06:00,091 --> 00:06:01,649 I'm a runner. 132 00:06:02,260 --> 00:06:03,852 Everybody knows it was Andy, 133 00:06:03,928 --> 00:06:07,728 and it is not fair for us all to take the fall for his big, stupid mouth. 134 00:06:07,799 --> 00:06:09,790 Ridiculous, Angela. 135 00:06:09,868 --> 00:06:11,768 And like I'm going to believe one of his spurned lovers. 136 00:06:12,270 --> 00:06:15,899 Look, he's been complaining about this for a while. It's not crazy. 137 00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:23,872 Okay, Dwight. Hold that thought. 138 00:06:23,948 --> 00:06:24,937 I don't want to waste your time 139 00:06:25,016 --> 00:06:26,483 and I wouldn't dare waste mine. 140 00:06:26,551 --> 00:06:27,609 I didn't do it. 141 00:06:27,685 --> 00:06:29,619 Now, I don't know exactly who did it, 142 00:06:30,221 --> 00:06:33,088 but I have a list right here. 143 00:06:34,025 --> 00:06:35,856 You should fire the following people. 144 00:06:36,394 --> 00:06:37,793 Well, I'm inclined to believe you. 145 00:06:37,862 --> 00:06:39,159 Why would I disparage a company that has 146 00:06:39,230 --> 00:06:40,754 made me rich beyond my wildest dreams? 147 00:06:40,832 --> 00:06:42,595 Yeah, I noticed you've had a great year. 148 00:06:42,667 --> 00:06:44,134 Good boy. 149 00:06:44,202 --> 00:06:46,329 You turning that money into more money? 150 00:06:49,007 --> 00:06:50,998 Are you referring to alchemy? 151 00:06:51,910 --> 00:06:53,571 I don't like to tell a man what to do with his money, 152 00:06:53,645 --> 00:06:55,078 but if you ain't investing in property, 153 00:06:55,146 --> 00:06:56,477 then you're dumber than a dummy. 154 00:06:56,681 --> 00:06:58,239 I'm not dumb, I'm smart. 155 00:06:58,416 --> 00:07:01,112 Well, buy property. That's my advice. 156 00:07:03,087 --> 00:07:04,952 Is there something that you would like to say to me? 157 00:07:05,557 --> 00:07:08,720 About talking to the press? Uh, I do... No... 158 00:07:08,793 --> 00:07:11,353 I didn't do that. Okay? 159 00:07:12,530 --> 00:07:14,498 Didn't do it. I don't believe you. 160 00:07:14,566 --> 00:07:17,535 I swear on the graves of my parents who aren't even dead yet. 161 00:07:17,802 --> 00:07:19,827 That's a little much. All right, all right. 162 00:07:19,904 --> 00:07:21,496 I don't care. That's how much, I swear. 163 00:07:21,573 --> 00:07:23,063 Okay, I believe you. I believe you. 164 00:07:23,308 --> 00:07:24,969 How come no one's giving Darryl any crap? 165 00:07:25,109 --> 00:07:26,804 He was more bothered about it than me. 166 00:07:29,781 --> 00:07:32,682 Did you tell anyone outside of this office 167 00:07:33,251 --> 00:07:35,048 that the printers were catching on fire? 168 00:07:37,388 --> 00:07:38,377 Yeah, I did. 169 00:07:39,791 --> 00:07:41,349 I was talking to this girl at a bar. 170 00:07:41,659 --> 00:07:42,648 Oh, no, no, no. 171 00:07:43,061 --> 00:07:45,256 I think she could sense my sadness. 172 00:07:45,330 --> 00:07:48,788 And I found out too late that she was a copyeditor at the Trib. 173 00:07:48,867 --> 00:07:49,856 Oh, my God. 174 00:07:50,134 --> 00:07:51,123 Was she cute? 175 00:07:51,369 --> 00:07:54,133 No. Oh, God, Darryl. 176 00:07:54,239 --> 00:07:57,436 I basically swore up and down that none of my employees did it. 177 00:07:57,508 --> 00:07:59,874 And then I find out that one of my best ones did. 178 00:08:00,378 --> 00:08:02,437 And now he's probably going to get fired for it. 179 00:08:03,681 --> 00:08:07,208 And if that is not poetic justice, I don't know what is. 180 00:08:09,187 --> 00:08:11,985 Sounds like you were as blind-sided by this as I was. 181 00:08:12,056 --> 00:08:13,045 Yes. 182 00:08:13,124 --> 00:08:15,058 And we didn't find anything on your computer. 183 00:08:15,260 --> 00:08:16,318 Good. 184 00:08:16,394 --> 00:08:17,793 Except this. 185 00:08:18,463 --> 00:08:22,763 Wow. This is just a mystery novel that I've been working on. 186 00:08:22,967 --> 00:08:25,333 I know what it is. I skimmed the first chapter. 187 00:08:25,470 --> 00:08:26,528 I'm just curious, 188 00:08:26,604 --> 00:08:28,595 why would a man who hates people 189 00:08:28,673 --> 00:08:31,301 want to have a relationship with a maid? 190 00:08:32,310 --> 00:08:33,800 I don't know... The way I look at it, 191 00:08:33,878 --> 00:08:35,539 there's only one of two reasons. 192 00:08:35,613 --> 00:08:38,548 He knows a secret about her that she doesn't know herself. 193 00:08:40,285 --> 00:08:44,585 Or he wants to use her services to mop up after a murder. 194 00:08:46,024 --> 00:08:47,184 Yes. 195 00:08:47,959 --> 00:08:49,620 Write your own damn novel. 196 00:08:50,762 --> 00:08:51,786 It was me. 197 00:08:52,030 --> 00:08:53,088 What was you? 198 00:08:54,499 --> 00:08:56,626 You were the leak? Okay, 199 00:08:56,701 --> 00:08:58,100 I'm talking to this woman at day care, 200 00:08:58,503 --> 00:09:01,700 she's telling me all about her amazing trip to Vietnam. I have nothing. 201 00:09:01,773 --> 00:09:04,435 I tell her our printers catch on fire spontaneously. 202 00:09:04,509 --> 00:09:05,567 Why'd you do that? Her husband's a reporter. 203 00:09:05,643 --> 00:09:06,735 Yeah. 204 00:09:07,211 --> 00:09:09,771 So, now everyone hates Andy, and it's this whole mess, 205 00:09:09,847 --> 00:09:12,008 and I don't know what to do. Okay, just relax. 206 00:09:12,884 --> 00:09:14,283 Just need to relax. 207 00:09:14,485 --> 00:09:17,613 I could tell Jo, or I could tell Michael. 208 00:09:18,756 --> 00:09:20,451 This is a very good idea. This is good. 209 00:09:20,525 --> 00:09:23,119 Let's get all the bad ideas out now. Flush them out. 210 00:09:23,328 --> 00:09:24,522 You leaked it? 211 00:09:24,595 --> 00:09:26,995 I don't know what to do. Do I go tell Jo or... 212 00:09:27,065 --> 00:09:28,930 I don't want everyone to keep blaming the wrong person. 213 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:31,264 I don't know what the best plan is, Pam. 214 00:09:32,470 --> 00:09:33,732 Oh, God. 215 00:09:34,305 --> 00:09:35,897 My mind is going a mile an hour. 216 00:09:35,974 --> 00:09:37,305 That fast? 217 00:09:38,843 --> 00:09:41,311 Two whistleblowers. Two. 218 00:09:42,246 --> 00:09:43,235 I always thought Darryl and Pam 219 00:09:43,314 --> 00:09:45,714 might get me fired for something I said. 220 00:09:48,553 --> 00:09:49,542 Yeah? 221 00:09:58,296 --> 00:10:00,355 I weirdly know exactly what you're saying to me. 222 00:10:00,531 --> 00:10:02,158 So, I'll see you in Meredith's van in five minutes. 223 00:10:02,300 --> 00:10:04,029 Okay, you didn't need to actually say that. 224 00:10:05,703 --> 00:10:07,933 I have never seen so many parking tickets. 225 00:10:08,406 --> 00:10:10,067 All right, this is just messed up. 226 00:10:10,141 --> 00:10:11,802 No, you know what's messed up? 227 00:10:11,876 --> 00:10:15,107 This situation all up in here is what's messed up. 228 00:10:15,179 --> 00:10:17,170 We need to brainstorm, we need to get out of this. 229 00:10:17,248 --> 00:10:20,115 Brain-hurricane, come on. Think. What have we got? 230 00:10:20,184 --> 00:10:21,276 Um... 231 00:10:22,286 --> 00:10:23,583 Hey, guys, sorry I'm late. 232 00:10:23,654 --> 00:10:24,712 We're not going for yogurt. 233 00:10:24,789 --> 00:10:27,314 It's okay, she's cool. She also whistle-blew. 234 00:10:27,392 --> 00:10:29,986 Guys, I couldn't help it. It is so boring where we work. 235 00:10:30,061 --> 00:10:31,926 I mean, it's as interesting as a morgue. 236 00:10:32,063 --> 00:10:33,928 It might be less interesting than a morgue. 237 00:10:34,132 --> 00:10:36,430 Hey, hey, it's as interesting as a morgue. 238 00:10:36,601 --> 00:10:38,796 Of course I'm the leak. I think I tweeted it. 239 00:10:39,070 --> 00:10:40,298 I can't control what I say to people. 240 00:10:40,371 --> 00:10:41,497 I spend the whole day talking. 241 00:10:41,572 --> 00:10:45,702 I mean, I video chat, I skype, I text, I tweet, I phone, I woof. 242 00:10:46,144 --> 00:10:47,406 Woof is a site that I'm launching to be 243 00:10:47,478 --> 00:10:49,105 the last word in social networking. 244 00:10:49,180 --> 00:10:51,205 For just $12.99 a month, Woof links up 245 00:10:51,282 --> 00:10:52,306 all your communication portals, 246 00:10:52,383 --> 00:10:53,714 so you are always within reach. 247 00:10:53,785 --> 00:10:55,275 It's part of the dog pack, as I call it. 248 00:10:55,353 --> 00:10:58,151 But look, why tell you, 249 00:10:58,222 --> 00:11:00,782 when I can show you? 250 00:11:01,259 --> 00:11:03,284 I just sent myself a woof. 251 00:11:06,197 --> 00:11:07,596 Ryan, you have a woof on line one. 252 00:11:07,665 --> 00:11:09,132 Thank you, Erin. 253 00:11:09,734 --> 00:11:10,826 Woof! 254 00:11:11,002 --> 00:11:15,098 Okay, here's what we do. I say we just smash all the computers. 255 00:11:15,273 --> 00:11:17,571 We destroy the evidence. No evidence, no case. 256 00:11:17,642 --> 00:11:19,940 Wouldn't we get fired for smashing all the computers? 257 00:11:20,011 --> 00:11:23,208 No, okay, not all the computers. Just our computers. 258 00:11:23,281 --> 00:11:24,839 That idea sucks. PAM: I don't think that's a good idea. 259 00:11:24,916 --> 00:11:25,940 Just don't say no. 260 00:11:26,017 --> 00:11:28,781 Mike, you know you don't have to turn us all in. 261 00:11:30,121 --> 00:11:32,089 All you need is one scapegoat. 262 00:11:32,924 --> 00:11:34,915 Uh, if you turn me in, I'm turning in Darryl. 263 00:11:35,093 --> 00:11:38,290 That's just what we need, another black man in prison, you know? 264 00:11:38,362 --> 00:11:41,024 Nobody's going to prison. Okay? 265 00:11:41,999 --> 00:11:45,730 All right, Michael, you need to convince Jo to go easy on us. 266 00:11:45,803 --> 00:11:48,499 And then we'll all confess once we know our jobs are safe. 267 00:11:48,940 --> 00:11:50,965 Okay, you can count on me. 268 00:11:53,778 --> 00:11:55,177 Let me give you a hand. 269 00:11:55,346 --> 00:11:56,540 Ready? On three. 270 00:11:59,250 --> 00:12:01,047 Oh, shoot. Got it? 271 00:12:01,119 --> 00:12:02,347 Got it. 272 00:12:03,754 --> 00:12:04,778 Dwight Schrute. 273 00:12:04,856 --> 00:12:06,721 The property you're looking at is in great shape. 274 00:12:06,791 --> 00:12:09,351 By the way, it has a very spacious basement office. 275 00:12:09,660 --> 00:12:12,993 Basement office? You mean like a lair? 276 00:12:14,532 --> 00:12:16,591 Hey, Jo. Michael. 277 00:12:17,568 --> 00:12:19,502 I was thinking about our little leak problem. 278 00:12:19,570 --> 00:12:20,764 I was up all lunch thinking about 279 00:12:20,838 --> 00:12:22,669 what we should do to this individual. 280 00:12:23,708 --> 00:12:25,505 You know what I think we should do? 281 00:12:25,576 --> 00:12:29,034 We make them come to work. And we work them, 282 00:12:29,113 --> 00:12:32,412 and we make them sit next to all the people they screwed over. 283 00:12:32,984 --> 00:12:35,043 And we pay them, 284 00:12:35,119 --> 00:12:39,579 but we make them feel like they did something really wrong. 285 00:12:39,724 --> 00:12:42,090 The one question I have is, "Do we give them a Christmas bonus?" 286 00:12:42,260 --> 00:12:44,785 I say yes, it's Christmas, 287 00:12:44,862 --> 00:12:48,161 but right after, they're back into the thick of it. 288 00:12:48,232 --> 00:12:49,859 Michael Scott. 289 00:12:51,202 --> 00:12:52,601 What do you know? 290 00:12:53,371 --> 00:12:54,565 What? 291 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:56,937 It doesn't matter what I know. 292 00:12:57,008 --> 00:12:59,101 If it doesn't matter, then tell me. Why? 293 00:12:59,177 --> 00:13:01,702 Because I wanna deal with it the way I deal with it. 294 00:13:01,779 --> 00:13:03,576 Well, deal with this. 295 00:13:05,550 --> 00:13:07,415 Empathize with me for a moment. 296 00:13:07,485 --> 00:13:09,112 I came up here with a big problem, 297 00:13:09,187 --> 00:13:11,052 and now, I've got a branch manager 298 00:13:11,122 --> 00:13:12,885 who's giving me the silent treatment. 299 00:13:14,559 --> 00:13:15,719 Speak to me. 300 00:13:17,094 --> 00:13:18,083 Speak. 301 00:13:22,466 --> 00:13:23,660 Come with me. 302 00:13:24,235 --> 00:13:25,224 What? 303 00:13:28,172 --> 00:13:32,575 Are you leaving? Oh, my. Should I continue with the investigation? 304 00:13:46,123 --> 00:13:47,647 Are you gonna kill me? 305 00:13:53,664 --> 00:13:55,655 I just need you to come by later and sign a few forms. 306 00:13:55,733 --> 00:13:58,031 Okay. What time works for you? 307 00:13:59,470 --> 00:14:02,132 Mr. Schrute? What time works? 308 00:14:05,376 --> 00:14:09,676 Cancel it. I want you to make an offer at 1725 Slough Avenue. 309 00:14:10,514 --> 00:14:12,675 Make them an offer they can't refuse. 310 00:14:12,750 --> 00:14:15,184 No, on second thought, lowball them. 311 00:14:15,987 --> 00:14:17,750 Don't call me till you have it. 312 00:14:17,822 --> 00:14:18,880 But... 313 00:14:20,858 --> 00:14:22,450 Are we going someplace far away? 314 00:14:22,526 --> 00:14:24,721 I know you said no questions, 315 00:14:27,531 --> 00:14:30,056 but I have an early dinner that I need to get to. 316 00:14:31,736 --> 00:14:33,203 With the chief of police. 317 00:14:33,771 --> 00:14:36,137 I'm very relieved to learn it wasn't you. 318 00:14:37,208 --> 00:14:39,506 All right. Stan, you're up. 319 00:14:39,777 --> 00:14:41,074 It wasn't me. 320 00:14:41,846 --> 00:14:44,144 What a rich timbre your voice has. 321 00:14:44,715 --> 00:14:47,775 Okay, I am prepared to conclude the investigation. 322 00:14:49,020 --> 00:14:50,920 And? You did it. 323 00:14:51,622 --> 00:14:54,147 What? Based on what? 324 00:14:54,592 --> 00:14:58,153 Just all the evidence. And it really seems like it was you. 325 00:14:58,863 --> 00:15:00,797 Can we all agree to say that it was Andy for now 326 00:15:00,865 --> 00:15:02,924 and sit with it, see how it feels? 327 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,399 All right, sounds good. Okay. 328 00:15:04,468 --> 00:15:06,231 Guys, I think that seems a little unfair. 329 00:15:06,304 --> 00:15:08,499 I mean, I feel like we don't definitely know it was Andy. 330 00:15:08,572 --> 00:15:13,168 Yeah, you know? I mean, for all we know, it could have been Jim. 331 00:15:14,045 --> 00:15:15,069 Really? 332 00:15:15,146 --> 00:15:16,704 Michael. I have rights. 333 00:15:17,281 --> 00:15:18,373 Let's just talk. 334 00:15:18,449 --> 00:15:20,144 I am not going to tell you anything. 335 00:15:20,618 --> 00:15:23,451 Honey, you don't seem like your normal self. 336 00:15:24,822 --> 00:15:26,756 Well, I'm going through a little bit of a rough patch. 337 00:15:26,824 --> 00:15:28,815 Mama Jo knew there was something up. 338 00:15:28,893 --> 00:15:30,758 The whole year, actually. 339 00:15:31,696 --> 00:15:33,561 My favorite restaurant closed down. Oh. 340 00:15:33,998 --> 00:15:35,226 I hate that. 341 00:15:35,299 --> 00:15:37,859 And my new favorite restaurant sucks. 342 00:15:40,705 --> 00:15:42,673 I bought a video camera last year 343 00:15:42,740 --> 00:15:44,469 and I was looking at the tapes, 344 00:15:44,775 --> 00:15:48,643 and there were only, like, 12 minutes that I felt was worth taping. 345 00:15:48,713 --> 00:15:50,237 The whole year. 346 00:15:50,815 --> 00:15:53,215 And most of that was just birds in my condo complex. 347 00:15:53,684 --> 00:15:54,878 What is that? 348 00:15:57,722 --> 00:15:59,155 And I miss Holly. 349 00:15:59,757 --> 00:16:01,190 Who's Holly? 350 00:16:01,359 --> 00:16:04,089 Holly Flax. From the Nashua branch. 351 00:16:04,729 --> 00:16:07,254 Best HR rep that Dunder Mifflin has ever seen. 352 00:16:10,334 --> 00:16:12,734 It has not been a blockbuster year for me financially. 353 00:16:13,170 --> 00:16:15,070 My Blockbuster stock is down. 354 00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:18,274 I think that the real question is, 355 00:16:19,176 --> 00:16:20,973 "Who is the whistleblower?" 356 00:16:21,645 --> 00:16:22,634 Just... 357 00:16:22,980 --> 00:16:25,540 I may have heard from an old client and I may have immediately 358 00:16:25,616 --> 00:16:29,074 started spreading the news to other clients and potential clients, yeah. 359 00:16:29,987 --> 00:16:31,352 But I'm not here to talk about that. 360 00:16:31,422 --> 00:16:34,858 I'm here to talk about Suck lt. Suck lt... 361 00:16:34,925 --> 00:16:38,122 Gabe, I told you all about the printers. 362 00:16:38,195 --> 00:16:39,355 I mean, it could be you, Gabe. 363 00:16:39,730 --> 00:16:41,197 Yes, it's totally obvious. I mean, that's the point. 364 00:16:41,298 --> 00:16:44,631 I think we all can agree it's either Gabe or Angela. 365 00:16:45,236 --> 00:16:46,828 It's Angela. Get her, boys. 366 00:16:47,438 --> 00:16:49,565 Hey, guys. Sorry to interrupt. 367 00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:51,232 I just wanted to say goodbye to everyone. 368 00:16:51,308 --> 00:16:52,536 Through Teach For America, 369 00:16:52,610 --> 00:16:53,634 I'm going to go down to Detroit 370 00:16:53,711 --> 00:16:55,611 and teach inner-city kids about computers. 371 00:16:56,247 --> 00:16:57,646 Not now. NICK: Yeah, it's just that my friends 372 00:16:57,715 --> 00:16:59,740 are in the car waiting, so I thought I'd... 373 00:16:59,950 --> 00:17:02,180 Phyllis, what's this guy's name again? 374 00:17:02,319 --> 00:17:05,618 I don't know. Is it Shadow or Garth? It's something weird, I... 375 00:17:05,790 --> 00:17:06,882 My name is Nick. 376 00:17:06,957 --> 00:17:09,790 Okay, well, "Nick," we're in a meeting. 377 00:17:10,161 --> 00:17:14,154 Okay, look, I get it, people. I'm the lame IT guy and everybody hates me. 378 00:17:14,565 --> 00:17:16,192 Hey, listen, man, you can't take it personally. 379 00:17:16,567 --> 00:17:18,558 You call me "man"? I just said my name, 380 00:17:18,636 --> 00:17:20,263 just now. Did you forget it already? 381 00:17:20,337 --> 00:17:21,326 No, 382 00:17:22,506 --> 00:17:23,564 sport. 383 00:17:24,275 --> 00:17:26,869 You guys have 15 parties a week. You can't learn my name? 384 00:17:26,944 --> 00:17:29,378 Hey, hey, hey, IT guy. 385 00:17:29,447 --> 00:17:30,709 Here's the story, champ. 386 00:17:30,781 --> 00:17:32,646 None of us have spent a lot of time getting to know you, okay? 387 00:17:32,716 --> 00:17:36,277 We liked the last guy, Sadiq, because he kept to himself. 388 00:17:36,353 --> 00:17:37,945 And we also thought he might have been a terrorist. 389 00:17:38,189 --> 00:17:40,214 You know what? I'm going to leave you with one other thought. 390 00:17:40,291 --> 00:17:43,818 Inner-city kids use computers for two things, games and porn. 391 00:17:43,894 --> 00:17:46,727 So, good luck wasting your life, Lurch. 392 00:17:46,797 --> 00:17:48,264 Thank you so much for that. 393 00:17:48,332 --> 00:17:50,323 I saw all of your hard drives. And guess what? 394 00:17:50,968 --> 00:17:53,869 You're not a photographer. And you definitely can't fit into a size two. 395 00:17:53,938 --> 00:17:55,565 Darryl, man, you're on Facebook. 396 00:17:55,639 --> 00:17:57,334 Why have you been telling people you're not on Facebook? 397 00:17:57,575 --> 00:17:59,236 People want to be your friend, man. KELLY: Hey. 398 00:17:59,610 --> 00:18:01,976 All right? And you... This guy. 399 00:18:02,146 --> 00:18:03,238 You're the one who told the press. 400 00:18:03,314 --> 00:18:04,645 You wrote an e-mail to the editor. 401 00:18:04,715 --> 00:18:06,740 I saw it and I also saw a Quicktime movie 402 00:18:06,817 --> 00:18:09,183 of your little printer fire test on your hard drive. 403 00:18:09,253 --> 00:18:12,484 This guy's the snitch, he's the snitch. So, that's it. Check it out. 404 00:18:15,226 --> 00:18:17,160 We're going to believe that guy? 405 00:18:18,095 --> 00:18:19,756 When I was growing up, 406 00:18:19,830 --> 00:18:23,493 there was nothing better than being a big old business tycoon. 407 00:18:24,335 --> 00:18:26,462 And I thought I'd break that glass ceiling 408 00:18:26,537 --> 00:18:29,734 and be a hero to all those little girls out there. 409 00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:32,733 And they'd make a Barbie out of me. 410 00:18:35,279 --> 00:18:37,577 I hate that I sell cheap printers. 411 00:18:38,716 --> 00:18:39,808 I do. 412 00:18:41,085 --> 00:18:43,110 But if I have to go out there in front of the press 413 00:18:43,187 --> 00:18:46,384 and make one of them public apology recalls, 414 00:18:46,457 --> 00:18:50,951 I mean, that's all I'll ever be remembered for. 415 00:18:51,562 --> 00:18:53,689 Nobody will want to play with my Barbie. 416 00:18:56,433 --> 00:18:58,458 Well, you know, I would be willing, 417 00:18:58,536 --> 00:19:00,094 under the right circumstances, 418 00:19:00,170 --> 00:19:01,728 to do that for you. 419 00:19:01,839 --> 00:19:05,104 Oh, honey, surely you don't want that. 420 00:19:07,411 --> 00:19:10,107 I surely do, and don't call me honey. 421 00:19:16,487 --> 00:19:17,784 Airplane II. 422 00:19:18,055 --> 00:19:20,114 I'm about to buy this building, you know? 423 00:19:21,725 --> 00:19:23,249 You don't say. 424 00:19:23,627 --> 00:19:26,790 I own a one-eighth share in a rental property down in Pittston. 425 00:19:27,064 --> 00:19:29,589 Well, I'm one-eighths proud of you. 426 00:19:31,602 --> 00:19:33,229 Enjoy that chair for now. 427 00:19:34,471 --> 00:19:37,668 'Cause pretty soon you will be on your feet. 428 00:19:38,175 --> 00:19:39,802 Like Buckingham Palace. 429 00:19:45,015 --> 00:19:46,915 Hey, Phyllis, have you seen my bag? 430 00:19:48,953 --> 00:19:50,215 You deserve it. 431 00:19:51,121 --> 00:19:53,817 Look, I didn't want houses and schools 432 00:19:53,891 --> 00:19:56,291 to burn down and children to die. 433 00:19:58,095 --> 00:19:59,426 Does that make me a hero? 434 00:19:59,496 --> 00:20:01,361 No, it does not. 435 00:20:03,801 --> 00:20:06,463 Well, it doesn't make me the worst guy in the world, either. 436 00:20:06,537 --> 00:20:07,765 It does! 437 00:20:10,274 --> 00:20:12,139 Andy? Hey. 438 00:20:12,576 --> 00:20:17,377 I wanted to say that I think it was very brave of you to go to the press. 439 00:20:24,888 --> 00:20:26,185 Thanks. 440 00:20:27,024 --> 00:20:28,821 Yeah, you know. 441 00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:32,051 Just seemed like the right thing to do. 442 00:20:32,129 --> 00:20:33,118 Yeah. 443 00:20:38,869 --> 00:20:40,530 "We at Sabre have betrayed the trust 444 00:20:40,604 --> 00:20:42,731 "that we have built with our customers. 445 00:20:42,806 --> 00:20:46,902 "We regret our slow response and our lapse in candor and judgment. 446 00:20:47,478 --> 00:20:52,438 "At this time, we are issuing a full recall of all Sabre GH400 printers. 447 00:20:53,183 --> 00:20:55,617 "We will not rest until this problem is solved. 448 00:20:55,753 --> 00:20:59,052 "There will be no questions." Are there any questions? 449 00:21:04,662 --> 00:21:07,961 Hey, I appreciate you reading that statement. You looked pretty up there. 450 00:21:08,032 --> 00:21:09,226 That was fun. 451 00:21:09,299 --> 00:21:11,096 I hope your rough patch ends soon. 452 00:21:11,168 --> 00:21:12,499 Thanks. Today helped. 453 00:21:13,003 --> 00:21:15,665 Well, give a shout if I can brighten your life. 454 00:21:15,939 --> 00:21:19,033 Okay. Hey, you could transfer Holly back from Nashua. 455 00:21:21,712 --> 00:21:22,974 Let me see what I can do.