1 00:00:30,389 --> 00:00:32,527 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:35,289 --> 00:00:36,956 I'm taking some time off from work-- 3 00:00:36,991 --> 00:00:38,658 well, my other work-- 4 00:00:38,709 --> 00:00:43,246 because we needed it. 5 00:00:43,280 --> 00:00:44,497 It's great. 6 00:00:44,548 --> 00:00:46,566 It's great. 7 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:48,485 The phone's been ringing off the hook. 8 00:00:48,519 --> 00:00:50,286 The guys in Philly are kind of going nuts. 9 00:00:50,304 --> 00:00:52,639 But that doesn't matter. 10 00:00:52,673 --> 00:00:55,408 This does. 11 00:00:55,442 --> 00:00:58,178 It's the only thing that matters. 12 00:00:58,229 --> 00:00:59,813 We've had some really nice days together. 13 00:00:59,847 --> 00:01:01,598 Mm-hmm. 14 00:01:01,632 --> 00:01:02,599 Nice morning, too. 15 00:01:02,633 --> 00:01:06,569 Beesly. Oh, my God. 16 00:01:08,572 --> 00:01:09,805 Hey. 17 00:01:09,824 --> 00:01:13,026 Which tie makes me look like a guy who likes sofas? 18 00:01:13,077 --> 00:01:14,994 My agent's putting me up for a furniture commercial. 19 00:01:15,029 --> 00:01:17,664 Ah. Definitely blue. 20 00:01:17,698 --> 00:01:21,367 Totally, right? 21 00:01:21,418 --> 00:01:24,621 So, big tuna, what's up? Back in the small pond? 22 00:01:24,655 --> 00:01:26,339 For now, yeah, yeah. 23 00:01:26,373 --> 00:01:28,458 I was just spreading myself way too thin-- 24 00:01:28,492 --> 00:01:30,426 Thin-sliced tuna. Carpaccio. 25 00:01:30,461 --> 00:01:31,594 Go on. 26 00:01:31,629 --> 00:01:33,630 Uh, well, it took me a while. 27 00:01:33,664 --> 00:01:36,883 But I finally realized that I can't give 100% 28 00:01:36,934 --> 00:01:38,668 to two things at once, you know? 29 00:01:38,686 --> 00:01:41,020 Yeah. Tell me about it. 30 00:01:41,055 --> 00:01:44,057 I've been trying to act and manage this branch. 31 00:01:44,108 --> 00:01:45,191 Half the time, I don't know if I'm wearing 32 00:01:45,226 --> 00:01:48,144 my stage makeup or my work makeup. 33 00:01:48,178 --> 00:01:49,312 Huh. 34 00:01:49,346 --> 00:01:50,680 Well, you know, you can't have everything, 35 00:01:50,698 --> 00:01:53,199 so you gotta ask yourself what makes you the happiest. 36 00:01:53,234 --> 00:01:55,902 You just go all in for what's most important. 37 00:01:55,953 --> 00:01:58,955 That's my new thing. 38 00:02:11,919 --> 00:02:13,803 Is everything okay? 39 00:02:13,837 --> 00:02:16,923 No. Everything is not okay. 40 00:02:18,926 --> 00:02:20,343 The county took my cats. 41 00:02:20,377 --> 00:02:21,728 Wait, all of them? 42 00:02:21,762 --> 00:02:24,180 Two sacks' worth. 43 00:02:24,214 --> 00:02:27,483 Apparently, my apartment complex has rules 44 00:02:27,518 --> 00:02:31,738 about how many pets are too many for a studio. 45 00:02:31,772 --> 00:02:35,725 And while I was out picking Philip up 46 00:02:35,743 --> 00:02:38,494 from daycare, they came. 47 00:02:38,529 --> 00:02:41,230 They came into my house. 48 00:02:41,248 --> 00:02:43,566 That's-- that's awful, Angela. I'm so sorry. 49 00:02:43,584 --> 00:02:46,336 It's the bitch that lives downstairs. 50 00:02:46,370 --> 00:02:48,838 She's this uptight, judgmental shrew. 51 00:02:48,872 --> 00:02:50,573 You know the type. 52 00:02:50,591 --> 00:02:55,411 I've never met anyone like that. 53 00:02:55,429 --> 00:02:57,913 And they're gone. 54 00:02:57,932 --> 00:03:01,634 And I have no one left. 55 00:03:01,685 --> 00:03:06,689 Without my cats, I am utterly and completely alone. 56 00:03:09,026 --> 00:03:10,443 Angela, you still have your son. 57 00:03:10,477 --> 00:03:13,279 I guess. 58 00:03:13,314 --> 00:03:16,316 Attention, everyone. May I have your attention? 59 00:03:16,367 --> 00:03:21,103 There are four new deadly weapons in this office. 60 00:03:21,121 --> 00:03:23,289 Basher, thrasher, crasher, and-- 61 00:03:23,324 --> 00:03:24,374 Smasher. 62 00:03:24,408 --> 00:03:26,459 "Smasher"? No. Where'd you get that? 63 00:03:26,493 --> 00:03:27,460 Fireball. 64 00:03:27,494 --> 00:03:30,112 Cut! 65 00:03:30,130 --> 00:03:32,498 This morning, after hours of combat 66 00:03:32,549 --> 00:03:33,883 with some of the city's best teenagers, 67 00:03:33,917 --> 00:03:37,553 I earned my black belt in goju ryu martial arts. 68 00:03:37,588 --> 00:03:39,121 I had to find a new dojo 69 00:03:39,139 --> 00:03:41,157 after Sensei Ira and I parted ways. 70 00:03:41,191 --> 00:03:42,842 My new sensei, Sensei Billy, 71 00:03:42,893 --> 00:03:44,644 thought I had more than enough training 72 00:03:44,678 --> 00:03:45,812 to take the test. 73 00:03:45,846 --> 00:03:49,565 Turns out Sensei Ira was a bit of a shyster. 74 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:51,901 Sensei Billy says most students 75 00:03:51,935 --> 00:03:54,620 don't spend $150,000 over 20 years 76 00:03:54,655 --> 00:03:55,738 to get their black belt. 77 00:03:55,773 --> 00:03:57,907 I would like to invite you all 78 00:03:57,941 --> 00:03:59,325 to my black belt ceremony, 79 00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:02,478 right here in the office at lunch, 80 00:04:02,496 --> 00:04:06,666 lunch not provided. 81 00:04:10,254 --> 00:04:14,040 - Fireball! - Ahh! 82 00:04:14,091 --> 00:04:16,092 That's how it's done. 83 00:04:16,126 --> 00:04:18,344 That's pretty good. I feel safe. 84 00:04:25,886 --> 00:04:28,054 Hey, Erin. Is Andy in? 85 00:04:30,173 --> 00:04:31,891 Oh, is Andy in? 86 00:04:31,942 --> 00:04:34,027 Sorry, I-I thought you said "is Indian?" 87 00:04:34,061 --> 00:04:36,195 And I was like, "is Indian what?" 88 00:04:37,564 --> 00:04:39,365 Is Indian food good? 89 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:41,284 Is Indian jewelry pretty? 90 00:04:41,318 --> 00:04:43,352 Is Indian hair an expensive kind of wig? 91 00:04:43,370 --> 00:04:45,238 Yes to all three, by the way. 92 00:04:45,289 --> 00:04:47,690 Lately, I've been having a lot of trouble 93 00:04:47,708 --> 00:04:49,242 keeping track of Andy's calendar. 94 00:04:49,293 --> 00:04:52,045 His student film audition schedule is crazy hectic. 95 00:04:52,079 --> 00:04:53,463 Yes. There's Andy. 96 00:04:53,497 --> 00:04:54,747 Andy is in. I'm a good receptionist. 97 00:04:54,798 --> 00:04:55,915 I know he's in. 98 00:04:55,966 --> 00:04:58,718 David Walrus in his native habitat. 99 00:04:58,752 --> 00:05:00,202 Hey, Andy. 100 00:05:00,220 --> 00:05:01,337 Can we go in your office and talk? 101 00:05:01,371 --> 00:05:02,805 Yeah. 102 00:05:02,840 --> 00:05:04,924 This isn't gonna be an easy conversation. 103 00:05:04,975 --> 00:05:06,876 I told Andy that he was on very thin ice 104 00:05:06,894 --> 00:05:09,429 when he snuck away for three months to the Caribbean. 105 00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:11,731 Then last week, he used company money 106 00:05:11,733 --> 00:05:13,883 to buy a top-of-the-line photo printer. 107 00:05:13,901 --> 00:05:17,403 In his words, "the kind that's good for head shots." 108 00:05:17,438 --> 00:05:21,107 And yesterday, he asked me to pay for cheek implants. 109 00:05:21,158 --> 00:05:22,775 Claimed it's going to boost office morale. 110 00:05:22,826 --> 00:05:24,410 Now, he's a good guy. 111 00:05:24,445 --> 00:05:27,363 But honestly, at a certain point, 112 00:05:27,397 --> 00:05:29,231 the ice gets too thin, 113 00:05:29,249 --> 00:05:32,401 and you fall through. 114 00:05:32,419 --> 00:05:33,870 And that is when you get fired. 115 00:05:36,151 --> 00:05:39,069 - Andy. - I'm gonna stop you right there. 116 00:05:39,103 --> 00:05:41,888 David, this documentary is going to air in two weeks. 117 00:05:41,906 --> 00:05:44,040 I feel like it's a once in a lifetime opportunity 118 00:05:44,075 --> 00:05:45,391 to pursue my dream. 119 00:05:45,409 --> 00:05:46,860 Uh-huh. But-- 120 00:05:46,894 --> 00:05:49,579 Every minute that I spend here 121 00:05:49,614 --> 00:05:52,098 is time not spent making audition videos 122 00:05:52,133 --> 00:05:55,619 for reality dating, cooking, or singing shows. 123 00:05:55,670 --> 00:05:57,537 I got a real shot here. 124 00:05:57,571 --> 00:06:00,790 And I'll never be able to forgive myself 125 00:06:00,842 --> 00:06:02,342 if I blew it because I was too focused 126 00:06:02,376 --> 00:06:04,127 on my stupid paper company job. 127 00:06:04,178 --> 00:06:05,462 No offense. 128 00:06:05,513 --> 00:06:07,914 So you think you've been too focused on your job? 129 00:06:07,949 --> 00:06:09,766 At my last head shot sitting, 130 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:10,767 I was so distracted 131 00:06:10,801 --> 00:06:12,552 wondering what I was missing at work 132 00:06:12,587 --> 00:06:14,254 that I came across totally manic. 133 00:06:14,272 --> 00:06:16,973 And I was going for zany. 134 00:06:19,110 --> 00:06:21,111 So you-- you want to quit Dunder Mifflin 135 00:06:21,145 --> 00:06:22,112 to pursue acting? 136 00:06:22,146 --> 00:06:24,814 Well, no, actually. 137 00:06:24,866 --> 00:06:28,935 I see no reason to limit myself to just acting. 138 00:06:28,953 --> 00:06:31,988 I am pursuing fame of any kind. 139 00:06:32,039 --> 00:06:34,708 Could be singing. Could be dancing. 140 00:06:34,742 --> 00:06:36,126 I don't-- it just-- 141 00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:39,946 I owe it to myself and my future fans. 142 00:06:39,964 --> 00:06:42,883 Uh, well, I guess I can't stand 143 00:06:42,917 --> 00:06:46,052 in the way of a man's dream. 144 00:06:46,087 --> 00:06:48,088 And it seems like you have the gift. 145 00:06:51,192 --> 00:06:52,926 Thank you, David. 146 00:06:52,960 --> 00:06:54,477 There's probably no way I can talk you 147 00:06:54,512 --> 00:06:55,929 into staying at this point, huh? 148 00:06:55,963 --> 00:06:58,481 Nope. I have made up my mind. 149 00:06:58,516 --> 00:06:59,599 I'm really sorry. 150 00:06:59,633 --> 00:07:01,067 Well, good luck. 151 00:07:01,102 --> 00:07:02,986 Hey, thank you. 152 00:07:03,020 --> 00:07:03,987 Not gonna need it. 153 00:07:04,021 --> 00:07:07,991 Okay. 154 00:07:13,197 --> 00:07:15,715 Well, that kind of worked out. 155 00:07:15,750 --> 00:07:18,735 I think just about anybody could be a star. 156 00:07:18,769 --> 00:07:20,904 My postman, the night janitor here-- 157 00:07:20,938 --> 00:07:23,590 but Andy? No, definitely not. 158 00:07:23,624 --> 00:07:25,175 Charisma black hole. 159 00:07:30,014 --> 00:07:32,549 Oh. Clark. 160 00:07:32,600 --> 00:07:35,335 I'm actually here today. Surprise. 161 00:07:35,353 --> 00:07:37,771 So I was wondering if maybe I could have my desk back. 162 00:07:37,805 --> 00:07:39,139 Right. Yeah. 163 00:07:39,173 --> 00:07:41,358 But, you know, I've actually been working 164 00:07:41,392 --> 00:07:43,176 pretty hard here on a daily basis. 165 00:07:43,194 --> 00:07:45,511 So I kind of feel like I've earned this. 166 00:07:45,529 --> 00:07:46,679 - I mean, you know? - You totally have. 167 00:07:46,697 --> 00:07:47,714 You have earned it. 168 00:07:47,748 --> 00:07:50,850 But maybe I could be with my wife. 169 00:07:50,868 --> 00:07:52,152 It's kind of the whole reason why I'm here. 170 00:07:52,186 --> 00:07:53,403 Right. 171 00:07:53,454 --> 00:07:55,071 Well, I'm here to sell paper. 172 00:07:56,690 --> 00:07:59,692 - Burn. - Wow. 173 00:08:01,996 --> 00:08:04,965 All right, Jim, look. I just got made junior salesman. 174 00:08:04,999 --> 00:08:06,750 Right? And-- and Wallace is here today. 175 00:08:06,801 --> 00:08:08,301 And I don't want him to just think of me 176 00:08:08,336 --> 00:08:11,721 as a customer service rep that sits in the annex. 177 00:08:11,756 --> 00:08:12,756 I mean, you can get that, right? 178 00:08:12,807 --> 00:08:14,040 Right? 179 00:08:14,058 --> 00:08:16,426 And what do you need more face time with Wallace for? 180 00:08:16,477 --> 00:08:21,514 You trying to get a-- a second second job here? 181 00:08:21,548 --> 00:08:22,515 It's okay. 182 00:08:22,549 --> 00:08:23,883 You can sit in the annex. 183 00:08:23,901 --> 00:08:27,553 - What? - I'll come visit you. 184 00:08:29,940 --> 00:08:31,825 Okay. 185 00:08:31,859 --> 00:08:33,493 The annex it is. 186 00:08:33,527 --> 00:08:34,744 I'll be sitting at your desk, 187 00:08:34,779 --> 00:08:36,162 if that's okay with you. 188 00:08:36,197 --> 00:08:37,614 It's fine with me. Have fun. 189 00:08:37,665 --> 00:08:38,915 But be careful. 190 00:08:38,949 --> 00:08:40,917 It is very easy to get lost 191 00:08:40,951 --> 00:08:45,505 in Pete's beautiful, dead eyes. 192 00:08:45,539 --> 00:08:48,758 Everyone, a little breaking news for you. 193 00:08:48,793 --> 00:08:50,910 Just had a little chat with David Wallace. 194 00:08:50,928 --> 00:08:53,713 And, um, I'm taking a leave of absence 195 00:08:53,747 --> 00:08:56,466 from Dunder Mifflin forever. 196 00:08:56,517 --> 00:08:58,101 I can't say we didn't see it coming, 197 00:08:58,135 --> 00:09:00,970 but it's a sad day when anybody is fired. 198 00:09:01,022 --> 00:09:02,088 We're so sorry, Andy. 199 00:09:02,106 --> 00:09:04,257 Uh, uh, uh, uh, Andy was not fired. 200 00:09:04,275 --> 00:09:05,475 I wasn't fired. 201 00:09:05,526 --> 00:09:07,760 What are you talking about? 202 00:09:07,778 --> 00:09:11,448 I'm fired up. Yes. 203 00:09:11,482 --> 00:09:13,700 Guys, I'm-- I'm leaving to pursue 204 00:09:13,734 --> 00:09:15,869 my lifelong dream of being famous. 205 00:09:15,903 --> 00:09:19,456 Oh, Andy. 206 00:09:19,490 --> 00:09:23,460 Yeah, so I'll see you on the red carpet. 207 00:09:25,329 --> 00:09:27,780 'Cause see, that's how it works. 208 00:09:27,798 --> 00:09:30,750 Andy sings beautifully, 209 00:09:30,784 --> 00:09:32,385 and he's really good at dancing. 210 00:09:32,420 --> 00:09:34,187 He's a good speaker. 211 00:09:34,221 --> 00:09:37,757 But there's just something there you don't want to look at. 212 00:09:40,409 --> 00:09:42,409 Hey, how am I doing it as your desk mate, by the way? 213 00:09:43,010 --> 00:09:45,445 You probably miss Clark. 214 00:09:45,463 --> 00:09:47,547 Yeah, a little bit. 215 00:09:47,582 --> 00:09:49,583 Oh, wow. But, um-- oh, I get that-- 216 00:09:49,617 --> 00:09:51,784 Oh, no, no. No, it's cool. 217 00:09:51,802 --> 00:09:54,337 - I get it. - It's cool, man. 218 00:09:54,388 --> 00:09:57,007 I'm sure you and I will have our own thing. 219 00:09:57,058 --> 00:09:59,342 Yeah. Definitely. 220 00:09:59,377 --> 00:10:01,928 Go Phillies, right? 221 00:10:01,962 --> 00:10:05,131 You don't watch baseball. I keep forgetting that. 222 00:10:05,149 --> 00:10:07,934 I just think you're going into this a little fast. 223 00:10:07,968 --> 00:10:10,637 I'm 38, Darryl. How much slower should I go? 224 00:10:10,655 --> 00:10:12,722 Show business is cold. 225 00:10:12,757 --> 00:10:15,475 Let's say you get a job, which you probably won't. 226 00:10:15,493 --> 00:10:17,661 They're not gonna cut you any slack. 227 00:10:17,695 --> 00:10:20,280 You're meant for a job with lots and lots of slack. 228 00:10:21,916 --> 00:10:24,367 All right. I get it. 229 00:10:24,418 --> 00:10:28,488 The male is a funny species. 230 00:10:28,522 --> 00:10:30,206 We don't just tell each other how we feel. 231 00:10:30,258 --> 00:10:31,591 That's chick stuff. 232 00:10:31,626 --> 00:10:35,828 So instead of saying, "hey, Andy, I love you, man. 233 00:10:35,846 --> 00:10:37,964 I don't want you to leave," 234 00:10:37,998 --> 00:10:40,850 you say something like, 235 00:10:40,885 --> 00:10:42,969 "hey, Andy, you're making the worst mistake of your life. 236 00:10:43,003 --> 00:10:45,338 You're not talented." 237 00:10:45,356 --> 00:10:48,275 Well... 238 00:10:48,309 --> 00:10:51,061 right back at you, Darryl. 239 00:10:57,401 --> 00:11:01,037 I'm gonna miss you, too. 240 00:11:01,072 --> 00:11:03,073 Mmm! 241 00:11:03,124 --> 00:11:04,958 Andy's from the generation that thinks 242 00:11:04,992 --> 00:11:06,359 they should all be famous. 243 00:11:06,377 --> 00:11:07,794 What happened to the generation 244 00:11:07,828 --> 00:11:10,196 that knew you shut up, did your work, 245 00:11:10,214 --> 00:11:12,515 and died quietly from a heart attack? 246 00:11:12,550 --> 00:11:15,785 Could Andy make it as an entertainer? 247 00:11:15,820 --> 00:11:16,836 I don't know. 248 00:11:16,870 --> 00:11:18,538 You know who's really funny? 249 00:11:18,556 --> 00:11:21,975 This bird in the park that can't fly right. 250 00:11:22,009 --> 00:11:23,944 I'd pay to see him. 251 00:11:23,978 --> 00:11:27,547 But I don't have to, 'cause the park is free. 252 00:11:30,768 --> 00:11:32,485 - Hyuh! Hyah! - Hyuh! Hyah! 253 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:33,987 I will now perform 254 00:11:34,021 --> 00:11:35,054 the ceremonial changing of the belts. 255 00:11:35,072 --> 00:11:36,072 He will now perform 256 00:11:36,107 --> 00:11:38,391 the ceremonial changing of the belts. 257 00:11:38,409 --> 00:11:40,560 It's not a large room. I think they heard me. 258 00:11:40,578 --> 00:11:42,278 Take my belt, master. 259 00:11:42,330 --> 00:11:45,248 I now submit to you every part of myself. 260 00:11:45,282 --> 00:11:46,399 That's really okay. 261 00:11:46,417 --> 00:11:48,618 I'm mostly focused on the belt here. 262 00:11:48,669 --> 00:11:51,171 Just slip it off my-- slip it off my hips. 263 00:11:51,205 --> 00:11:53,840 Hold it-- take a step back. 264 00:11:53,874 --> 00:11:55,742 Take a step back. 265 00:11:59,096 --> 00:12:00,630 Okay, okay, I can't-- 266 00:12:00,681 --> 00:12:03,933 I can't do this if you're gonna be thrusting like that, okay? 267 00:12:03,968 --> 00:12:07,604 I think we're gonna have to cut this off. 268 00:12:07,638 --> 00:12:08,722 He will now perform 269 00:12:08,756 --> 00:12:12,308 the ceremonial cutting off of the belt. 270 00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:14,144 He-- oh. 271 00:12:16,364 --> 00:12:19,199 Gah! Hyah! 272 00:12:19,233 --> 00:12:22,686 Dwight has been practicing karate for years. 273 00:12:22,720 --> 00:12:24,154 When we were dating, 274 00:12:24,205 --> 00:12:26,573 I would help him with his strength training. 275 00:12:26,607 --> 00:12:28,575 He would strap me to his chest 276 00:12:28,609 --> 00:12:31,628 in a Baby Bjorn made for fat children 277 00:12:31,662 --> 00:12:35,598 and do lunges across the farm. 278 00:12:35,633 --> 00:12:38,117 I felt like I was flying. 279 00:12:38,135 --> 00:12:39,118 There it is. 280 00:12:40,971 --> 00:12:44,474 - Congratulations. - We did it, we did it. 281 00:12:44,508 --> 00:12:45,975 - I love you. - Okay. 282 00:12:46,010 --> 00:12:48,595 Thanks. 283 00:12:49,730 --> 00:12:53,650 I will now perform my final kata forms. 284 00:12:53,684 --> 00:12:56,903 - You're going to watch me, right? - Yes, I will. 285 00:13:00,307 --> 00:13:02,025 - Sensei, you're not watching. - Yeah, I'm watching. 286 00:13:02,076 --> 00:13:03,576 Just do it. 287 00:13:12,453 --> 00:13:14,370 Ho! Ha! 288 00:13:14,422 --> 00:13:16,256 - Watching? - I'm watching. 289 00:13:16,290 --> 00:13:19,175 Watch this part, okay? 290 00:13:19,210 --> 00:13:21,461 Huh, gah! Gah! 291 00:13:21,495 --> 00:13:26,015 - Ha, ha, whoo. - Oh! 292 00:13:26,050 --> 00:13:29,602 Sensei, do you generally do house calls like this? 293 00:13:29,637 --> 00:13:31,638 Uh, you can just call me Billy. 294 00:13:31,672 --> 00:13:33,807 And no. No, but Dwight insisted. 295 00:13:33,841 --> 00:13:35,308 He wanted to receive his black belt 296 00:13:35,342 --> 00:13:37,143 in the place he loves most in the world. 297 00:13:37,177 --> 00:13:38,528 He said that? 298 00:13:41,365 --> 00:13:46,185 - He's an odd guy, isn't he? - Yes. 299 00:13:46,203 --> 00:13:48,488 Irritating? Also yes. 300 00:13:48,522 --> 00:13:50,073 But I've got to hand it to him, 301 00:13:50,124 --> 00:13:52,325 he is one of the most tenacious and determined men 302 00:13:52,359 --> 00:13:54,043 I've ever met. 303 00:13:54,078 --> 00:13:56,045 Hyuah! Hah! 304 00:13:56,080 --> 00:13:57,714 Hut! 305 00:14:00,885 --> 00:14:02,201 Ha-- ah! 306 00:14:02,219 --> 00:14:05,037 Unh! Kyah! 307 00:14:08,676 --> 00:14:11,144 Ha! Ahah! Aah! 308 00:14:15,215 --> 00:14:16,716 Oh! 309 00:14:16,734 --> 00:14:19,719 I am so proud of you, schrooberry blue. 310 00:14:25,433 --> 00:14:27,333 I really felt like I almost lost her. 311 00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:28,751 And-- and nothing is worth that. 312 00:14:28,802 --> 00:14:30,002 Well, I tell you, Jim, 313 00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:31,303 a lot of guys in my circle? 314 00:14:31,338 --> 00:14:33,305 They wouldn't even change their golf schedule 315 00:14:33,340 --> 00:14:34,373 to shore up their marriage, 316 00:14:34,391 --> 00:14:39,211 let alone their professional goals. 317 00:14:39,229 --> 00:14:42,381 Dude, there is no way that Jim is just back here 318 00:14:42,399 --> 00:14:44,066 to "hang out with Pam." 319 00:14:44,100 --> 00:14:47,820 You did not just say that. 320 00:14:47,854 --> 00:14:50,439 You don't know Pam. She is really cool. 321 00:14:50,490 --> 00:14:53,559 All I'm saying is, forget about my chair. 322 00:14:53,577 --> 00:14:55,578 He wants the manager's chair. 323 00:14:55,612 --> 00:14:57,079 And I thought you wanted that job. 324 00:14:57,113 --> 00:14:58,414 Yeah, I did. 325 00:14:58,448 --> 00:15:01,900 But I made too many mistakes. 326 00:15:01,918 --> 00:15:04,170 It's out of my reach now. 327 00:15:04,204 --> 00:15:08,257 Besides, I think Jim would be a fine manager. 328 00:15:08,291 --> 00:15:12,127 I'd be happy to see Jim as manager. 329 00:15:12,179 --> 00:15:14,413 So the reason I called you in here 330 00:15:14,431 --> 00:15:16,031 is because Andy is moving on. 331 00:15:16,066 --> 00:15:17,049 Again. 332 00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:18,767 Again. 333 00:15:18,802 --> 00:15:23,389 And I'm looking for a new manager. 334 00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:26,192 And with his performance this year, 335 00:15:26,226 --> 00:15:30,196 I have been considering Dwight. 336 00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:33,282 Am I crazy? 337 00:15:33,316 --> 00:15:35,201 Not at all. 338 00:15:35,235 --> 00:15:38,370 It should be Dwight. 339 00:15:38,405 --> 00:15:41,824 You sure? 340 00:15:41,875 --> 00:15:42,875 You're going to want to invest 341 00:15:42,909 --> 00:15:44,126 in a lot more liability insurance, 342 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:45,944 - but, uh... - Yeah. 343 00:15:45,962 --> 00:15:49,131 Hey, if there's someone who loves paper more than Dwight, 344 00:15:49,165 --> 00:15:50,966 I definitely don't want to meet that person. 345 00:15:56,506 --> 00:16:00,676 Andy, we just wondered if we could have a word. 346 00:16:00,727 --> 00:16:01,810 It's now or never. 347 00:16:01,845 --> 00:16:03,262 Well, we just had a quick question 348 00:16:03,296 --> 00:16:05,814 about this decision of yours. 349 00:16:05,849 --> 00:16:08,267 You know, to leave a stable job 350 00:16:08,301 --> 00:16:11,937 and pursue a career in the entertainment business 351 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,272 in your late 30s 352 00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:15,324 with no savings to fall back on 353 00:16:15,358 --> 00:16:17,860 and no real connections in that business, 354 00:16:17,911 --> 00:16:20,779 which can be competitive. 355 00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,281 Yeah, sure. What's your question? 356 00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:26,201 Our question is-- 357 00:16:26,236 --> 00:16:28,771 it seems dumb. 358 00:16:28,805 --> 00:16:30,806 Well, it's better than sticking around here 359 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:32,274 and half-assing it, right? 360 00:16:32,309 --> 00:16:33,642 Of course. 361 00:16:33,677 --> 00:16:38,347 But what if you were to stay here, 362 00:16:38,381 --> 00:16:41,917 you know, and "full-ass" it? 363 00:16:41,952 --> 00:16:43,986 - Yeah. - Um, really give it a go? 364 00:16:44,020 --> 00:16:47,323 Be the greatest manager in the history of this branch 365 00:16:47,357 --> 00:16:48,624 and in that way, 366 00:16:48,658 --> 00:16:50,826 achieve the fame and immortality that you seek? 367 00:16:50,860 --> 00:16:52,928 Hmm? 368 00:16:52,963 --> 00:16:55,164 Nah. I like my plan better. 369 00:16:55,198 --> 00:16:59,134 Well, Andy, your plan sucks, okay? 370 00:16:59,169 --> 00:17:02,237 Nobody is going to hire you ever. 371 00:17:02,272 --> 00:17:05,240 You're too character-y to be a lead, 372 00:17:05,275 --> 00:17:08,210 and you're not fat enough to be a great character actor. 373 00:17:08,244 --> 00:17:10,579 What? 374 00:17:10,613 --> 00:17:13,916 No, I don't think he can make it as an actor. 375 00:17:13,950 --> 00:17:16,885 But he also can't make it as an employee in an office, 376 00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:19,955 so, you know, why not go nuts with it? 377 00:17:19,990 --> 00:17:23,759 Hey, are you still in charge of office supplies? 378 00:17:23,793 --> 00:17:26,762 Yes. Yeah. 379 00:17:26,796 --> 00:17:28,681 I seem to have a sticky note emergency, 380 00:17:28,715 --> 00:17:30,566 where I grab it on the wrong end, 381 00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:31,850 and then, this happens. 382 00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:33,018 Oh, boy, um-- 383 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:35,354 If you could help me out, that would be-- 384 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:38,056 - I could give you some beginner stickies? 385 00:17:38,074 --> 00:17:39,491 - Anything would help. Thank you. - Okay. 386 00:17:39,526 --> 00:17:40,559 Here you go. 387 00:17:40,577 --> 00:17:42,027 Oh, also, while you're at it, 388 00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:45,197 if you did have a salt packet, three tacks, and some aspirin, 389 00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:46,281 that'd be great. 390 00:17:46,333 --> 00:17:48,734 - Oh, wow. You have that. - Mm-hmm. 391 00:17:48,752 --> 00:17:50,586 - Wow, that's-- - It's all yours. 392 00:17:50,620 --> 00:17:52,788 You come so prepared. 393 00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:54,840 Aspirin. 394 00:17:54,874 --> 00:17:56,175 If you want to get rid of a headache, 395 00:17:56,209 --> 00:17:57,292 you sit on something sharp. 396 00:17:57,344 --> 00:17:59,461 Any sensei will tell you that. 397 00:17:59,512 --> 00:18:03,265 Hey, congratulations on that black belt, man. 398 00:18:03,299 --> 00:18:05,551 It's really great. 399 00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:08,554 Thank you. 400 00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,723 So I saw you talking to Wallace earlier. 401 00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:12,107 Is he going to offer you the manager's job? 402 00:18:12,142 --> 00:18:14,610 No. 403 00:18:14,644 --> 00:18:16,528 He was maybe thinking of you for it. 404 00:18:16,563 --> 00:18:18,530 Yeah, right. 405 00:18:18,565 --> 00:18:20,899 I'm afraid that ship has sailed. 406 00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:23,602 I wouldn't be too sure about that. 407 00:18:23,620 --> 00:18:26,271 Just saying. 408 00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:35,614 - Hello. - Well, hello. 409 00:18:35,632 --> 00:18:36,782 Big day for you. 410 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:38,384 - Big day for you. - Thank you. 411 00:18:38,418 --> 00:18:40,169 - Love the belt. - Oh, yes. 412 00:18:40,220 --> 00:18:41,503 You know, I don't know anything about karate, 413 00:18:41,554 --> 00:18:43,305 but I have broken a few boards in my day. 414 00:18:43,339 --> 00:18:44,556 Hi-yah. 415 00:18:44,591 --> 00:18:47,593 Diving boards at my family pool in Redding. 416 00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:48,927 I was an obese child. 417 00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:50,462 I never talk about that here, 418 00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:53,632 but nard-dog's outta here, so lettin' it all hang out. 419 00:18:53,650 --> 00:18:55,184 This is exciting. 420 00:18:55,235 --> 00:18:57,603 You're finally gonna get to go out and flap your wings. 421 00:18:57,637 --> 00:18:59,738 Thank you. I appreciate that. 422 00:18:59,773 --> 00:19:01,740 'Cause a lot of people are saying I might not make it. 423 00:19:01,775 --> 00:19:03,025 Oh, I doubt you'll make it. 424 00:19:03,076 --> 00:19:04,993 Very few do who try to be a star. 425 00:19:05,028 --> 00:19:07,279 But listen, you've saved up enough money 426 00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:08,580 to take a couple of years off, 427 00:19:08,615 --> 00:19:11,250 and pursue your dream, and have some fun, right? 428 00:19:11,284 --> 00:19:14,870 No, I just applied for more overdraft protection. 429 00:19:14,921 --> 00:19:17,790 Andy, I have nothing to gain from getting you to stay, 430 00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:19,575 and everything to gain from you leaving. 431 00:19:19,609 --> 00:19:21,126 But please, I have known you for years. 432 00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,161 I have seen you perform. 433 00:19:23,179 --> 00:19:25,214 Dear God, don't quit your day job. 434 00:19:28,435 --> 00:19:30,001 Nothing is impossible 435 00:19:30,019 --> 00:19:31,603 to him who will try. 436 00:19:31,638 --> 00:19:34,640 Alexander the Great, if he were Cockney. 437 00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:40,011 You're bad. 438 00:19:42,732 --> 00:19:45,818 I'm gonna make it. 439 00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:47,302 Every person who's been on Conan 440 00:19:47,337 --> 00:19:50,489 has a crazy story about how they made it. 441 00:19:50,523 --> 00:19:52,574 Every person. 442 00:19:52,625 --> 00:19:55,077 Erin. 443 00:19:55,128 --> 00:19:56,795 Honest Erin. Cannot tell a lie. 444 00:19:56,830 --> 00:19:58,964 - Oh. - We lay together. 445 00:19:58,998 --> 00:20:02,200 That's something you can't take back. 446 00:20:02,218 --> 00:20:04,035 So true. 447 00:20:04,053 --> 00:20:06,872 Is there a question, or are-- what? 448 00:20:06,890 --> 00:20:08,140 Will you tell me bluntly? 449 00:20:08,174 --> 00:20:10,375 Do you think I'm making a terrible mistake 450 00:20:10,393 --> 00:20:12,227 quitting my job to become an actor? 451 00:20:12,262 --> 00:20:14,713 Bluntly? Yes. 452 00:20:14,731 --> 00:20:16,548 Huge mistake. 453 00:20:16,566 --> 00:20:20,102 Andy, honestly, I think you might become homeless 454 00:20:20,153 --> 00:20:23,772 or maybe even starve. 455 00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:27,993 Thank you. 456 00:20:31,197 --> 00:20:35,501 You can stay on as a salesman, Andy. 457 00:20:35,535 --> 00:20:38,287 Thank you. 458 00:20:43,293 --> 00:20:46,295 Dwight, could you come in here for a second, please? 459 00:21:05,864 --> 00:21:10,282 - Say it again. - Will you be the new manager? 460 00:21:10,300 --> 00:21:13,135 Where? 461 00:21:13,170 --> 00:21:15,454 - Where? - What branch? 462 00:21:15,472 --> 00:21:18,925 Here. Scranton. 463 00:21:21,345 --> 00:21:23,429 Come on. 464 00:21:23,463 --> 00:21:25,631 Come on, Dwight. Get up. 465 00:21:25,649 --> 00:21:28,467 Let's go. It's good news. 466 00:21:28,485 --> 00:21:30,820 I'm sorry. 467 00:21:30,854 --> 00:21:33,439 I've just waited for this moment my entire life. 468 00:21:33,473 --> 00:21:35,140 I mean, I was interim manager once, 469 00:21:35,158 --> 00:21:36,359 but then I shot that gun. 470 00:21:36,410 --> 00:21:37,493 What? 471 00:21:37,527 --> 00:21:40,029 But this isn't interim manager. 472 00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:42,832 No. 473 00:21:42,866 --> 00:21:46,819 It's Dwight K. Schrute... 474 00:21:46,837 --> 00:21:48,504 Manager. 475 00:21:48,538 --> 00:21:50,006 Why do you already have this? 476 00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:51,040 In case Michael or Andy 477 00:21:51,091 --> 00:21:52,425 ever got killed in a traffic accident 478 00:21:52,459 --> 00:21:54,427 and there was a trade show on the same day. 479 00:21:54,461 --> 00:21:56,696 You will not regret this decision, David. 480 00:21:56,730 --> 00:21:58,097 I know. 481 00:21:58,131 --> 00:22:01,851 I will never, ever let you down. 482 00:22:01,885 --> 00:22:04,220 I know, Dwight. 483 00:22:04,271 --> 00:22:07,606 I know. 484 00:22:08,976 --> 00:22:10,509 Okay. 485 00:22:10,527 --> 00:22:13,145 Okay. All righty. 486 00:22:13,179 --> 00:22:15,180 You're gonna do great. 487 00:22:33,166 --> 00:22:35,001 - Hey. - Wow, hey. 488 00:22:35,035 --> 00:22:38,087 Hi. 489 00:22:38,138 --> 00:22:39,872 What's up? 490 00:22:39,890 --> 00:22:43,009 - Um, I have a question. - Okay. 491 00:22:43,043 --> 00:22:45,227 Oh, I had a question. 492 00:22:45,262 --> 00:22:47,546 Really? 493 00:22:47,564 --> 00:22:49,899 - I did! - Yeah, totally you did. 494 00:22:49,933 --> 00:22:51,400 Super important. 495 00:22:51,435 --> 00:22:53,819 I need you to stay right here while you think about it. 496 00:22:53,854 --> 00:22:54,987 - Okay. - All right? I'm gonna wait. 497 00:22:55,022 --> 00:22:55,988 All right. 498 00:22:56,023 --> 00:22:58,074 I did not come back here just to see you. 499 00:22:58,108 --> 00:23:00,276 No, I'm sure you did not. 500 00:23:00,327 --> 00:23:02,028 What was your question? 501 00:23:02,062 --> 00:23:03,329 I don't know, 502 00:23:03,363 --> 00:23:05,197 but it might take me a long time to figure it out. 503 00:23:05,231 --> 00:23:06,332 Well, then, I should figure out 504 00:23:06,366 --> 00:23:08,084 things to do while I'm waiting. 505 00:23:08,118 --> 00:23:10,453 Exactly. 506 00:23:14,591 --> 00:23:17,242 Hey, everybody. I changed my mind. 507 00:23:17,260 --> 00:23:18,427 Not leaving. 508 00:23:18,462 --> 00:23:20,379 I'm gonna stay on in sales. 509 00:23:20,413 --> 00:23:23,432 Oh, thank God... 510 00:23:23,467 --> 00:23:26,135 because sales could be your best role yet. 511 00:23:26,186 --> 00:23:28,137 Hey. Good choice, man. 512 00:23:28,188 --> 00:23:29,355 Seriously. 513 00:23:29,389 --> 00:23:31,256 Don't wanna see you in a porn next year. 514 00:23:31,274 --> 00:23:32,591 Okay. 515 00:23:32,626 --> 00:23:35,478 Ooh, there's a great play about a salesman. 516 00:23:35,529 --> 00:23:36,946 Death of a Salesman. 517 00:23:36,980 --> 00:23:38,614 I don't think so. 518 00:23:38,648 --> 00:23:40,766 Sure,Death of a Salesman by Arthur Miller. 519 00:23:40,784 --> 00:23:42,485 It's a great play about crushed dreams. 520 00:23:42,536 --> 00:23:47,156 Mm, no, this one was written by Spongebob Squarepants. 521 00:23:58,785 --> 00:24:01,804 Got any hot leads? 522 00:24:04,424 --> 00:24:06,559 See, so you just push from under, 523 00:24:06,593 --> 00:24:09,562 and turn it around, and boom. 524 00:24:09,596 --> 00:24:11,230 Now, the staple crimps outward. 525 00:24:11,264 --> 00:24:12,648 I had no idea. 526 00:24:12,682 --> 00:24:14,967 And here, I've been stapling the same way for 20 years 527 00:24:14,985 --> 00:24:16,402 like a frickin' sheep. 528 00:24:16,436 --> 00:24:19,471 - Look who's back. - I'm back. 529 00:24:19,489 --> 00:24:21,657 Oh! Hey, look, and now, it's like a double date. 530 00:24:21,691 --> 00:24:22,992 Wow. 531 00:24:23,026 --> 00:24:25,494 'Cause, uh-- bop, bop. 532 00:24:25,529 --> 00:24:27,446 Tweedle-lee-doo. 533 00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:29,982 Actually, maybe we should go on a double date sometime. 534 00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:31,183 That'd be fun. 535 00:24:31,218 --> 00:24:32,751 Yeah, we should do that for real sometime. 536 00:24:32,786 --> 00:24:35,371 Well, how about Thursday? 537 00:24:35,422 --> 00:24:37,706 Oh, well, Thursday's tough because-- 538 00:24:37,757 --> 00:24:38,991 Weeknights are actually tough just because-- 539 00:24:39,009 --> 00:24:40,092 They are. That's true, yeah. 540 00:24:40,127 --> 00:24:41,093 Just forget it. 541 00:24:41,128 --> 00:24:45,164 - Forget I said anything. - Oh. 542 00:24:50,453 --> 00:24:51,804 Attention, everyone. 543 00:24:51,838 --> 00:24:53,355 Just a quick announcement. 544 00:24:53,390 --> 00:24:55,774 Little reconfiguration to the staff. 545 00:24:55,809 --> 00:24:59,695 - Dwight Schrute-- - David. 546 00:24:59,729 --> 00:25:00,863 Can I just do one thing 547 00:25:00,897 --> 00:25:02,148 while you're making this announcement? 548 00:25:02,182 --> 00:25:04,116 And then, I'll never, ever do it again. 549 00:25:04,151 --> 00:25:05,618 - I don't think so. - But it's just one thing. 550 00:25:05,652 --> 00:25:07,369 - Just let me-- let me do this-- - Dwight-- Dwight-- Dwight. 551 00:25:07,404 --> 00:25:09,188 Come on-- what I was about to say is Dwight-- 552 00:25:12,242 --> 00:25:13,459 Oh. 553 00:25:13,493 --> 00:25:14,627 I-I'm sorry, I gotta-- 554 00:25:14,661 --> 00:25:15,711 this'll be a second, sorry. 555 00:25:15,745 --> 00:25:18,330 Just wait and send it to voice mail. 556 00:25:18,364 --> 00:25:20,799 Yeah. 557 00:25:25,317 --> 00:25:27,015 Come on. 558 00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:35,564 Then we'll get him a new set of drums. 559 00:25:35,599 --> 00:25:37,066 Oh, my God. 560 00:25:37,100 --> 00:25:39,768 Oh, my God. 561 00:25:46,409 --> 00:25:52,331 Dwight Schrute is manager! 562 00:25:52,365 --> 00:25:54,200 Oh, yeah! 563 00:25:54,234 --> 00:25:57,536 Whoo! 564 00:25:57,570 --> 00:25:59,571 Brava. Brava. 565 00:25:59,589 --> 00:26:01,507 - Way to go, Dwight. - Whoo! 566 00:26:01,541 --> 00:26:05,878 Creed Bratton is the new manager! 567 00:26:08,081 --> 00:26:09,431 Congrats. 568 00:26:09,466 --> 00:26:12,751 - What's going on? - Dwight's the new manager. 569 00:26:12,769 --> 00:26:14,103 He freaking did it. 570 00:26:14,137 --> 00:26:18,590 Congratulations, Dwight. 571 00:26:18,608 --> 00:26:20,359 Pam. 572 00:26:20,393 --> 00:26:23,612 Congratulations, buddy. 573 00:26:26,783 --> 00:26:28,784 Thank you, Jim. 574 00:26:28,818 --> 00:26:31,570 Congrats, Dwight. 575 00:26:31,604 --> 00:26:34,456 Get out of Jim's seat. 576 00:26:34,491 --> 00:26:36,208 Wha-- but I fought for this seat. 577 00:26:36,243 --> 00:26:38,627 You're an annex kid. You might be bullpen. 578 00:26:38,662 --> 00:26:40,129 We'll see. Give it a couple years. 579 00:26:40,163 --> 00:26:42,281 Scram. 580 00:26:56,096 --> 00:27:00,099 It's nice to have you back. 581 00:27:02,736 --> 00:27:04,603 - So... - So... 582 00:27:04,637 --> 00:27:06,905 I wanted to offer you a new position. 583 00:27:06,940 --> 00:27:08,274 Let's hear it. 584 00:27:08,308 --> 00:27:10,826 Assistant regional manager. 585 00:27:10,860 --> 00:27:13,645 Nope. Can't accept that job. 586 00:27:13,663 --> 00:27:15,831 - It's not a real job. - Jim. 587 00:27:15,865 --> 00:27:17,616 I'll tell you what I could accept 588 00:27:17,650 --> 00:27:20,502 is assistant to the regional manager. 589 00:27:20,537 --> 00:27:22,988 That is a real job, and one I'd be proud to take. 590 00:27:23,006 --> 00:27:25,507 Shake on it? 591 00:27:25,542 --> 00:27:27,659 Done. Way to negotiate, idiot. 592 00:27:31,181 --> 00:27:35,017 Don't get me wrong. I am definitely here for Pam. 593 00:27:35,051 --> 00:27:38,721 But this is an awesome added bonus. 594 00:27:43,065 --> 00:27:45,965 So... all the numbers adding up? 595 00:27:46,026 --> 00:27:47,777 Hey, I didn't get a chance to say it, but... 596 00:27:47,828 --> 00:27:49,562 congratulations, Dwight. 597 00:27:49,580 --> 00:27:50,697 Thank you. 598 00:27:50,731 --> 00:27:53,082 Ahem. Yes, congratulations. 599 00:27:53,117 --> 00:27:54,667 Yeah, and, Dwight, I'd like to be 600 00:27:54,702 --> 00:27:59,088 the first to say congratulations. 601 00:27:59,123 --> 00:28:02,925 This is a big day for you. 602 00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:05,311 Hmm. 603 00:28:05,346 --> 00:28:06,913 Yes, it is. 604 00:28:12,970 --> 00:28:14,587 Carry on. 605 00:28:18,976 --> 00:28:21,628 How did I just abandon my dream so quickly? 606 00:28:21,662 --> 00:28:25,148 It's 'cause I had a fallback. That's the problem. 607 00:28:25,199 --> 00:28:28,318 When you have fallbacks, it's just easy to give up. 608 00:28:28,352 --> 00:28:30,570 When Cortez landed in Mexico, 609 00:28:30,604 --> 00:28:32,705 only way he got his men to defeat the Aztecs 610 00:28:32,740 --> 00:28:35,274 was by burning all of his own boats 611 00:28:35,292 --> 00:28:38,494 so they could never return home. 612 00:28:38,545 --> 00:28:40,946 Huge dick move, 613 00:28:40,964 --> 00:28:45,385 but very effective. 614 00:28:45,419 --> 00:28:48,287 I need to be that same kind of dick to myself. 615 00:28:52,292 --> 00:28:54,126 Everyone! 616 00:28:54,144 --> 00:28:56,312 - Changed my mind again. - Which is it now? 617 00:28:56,347 --> 00:28:58,631 - Dream or no dream? - Uh, dream. 618 00:28:58,649 --> 00:29:00,466 Goin' with my dream. 619 00:29:00,484 --> 00:29:02,318 Gotta go all in. Ain't that right, Jim? 620 00:29:02,353 --> 00:29:03,736 Oh, don't look at me, 621 00:29:03,771 --> 00:29:05,438 'cause I think you're making a terrible choice. 622 00:29:05,472 --> 00:29:06,856 All in! 623 00:29:06,907 --> 00:29:10,243 Whoo! 624 00:29:12,663 --> 00:29:14,647 Toby! 625 00:29:14,665 --> 00:29:17,083 Hey. I changed my mind again. 626 00:29:17,117 --> 00:29:19,869 I am gonna leave Dunder Mifflin to pursue acting after all. 627 00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:21,587 - Okay, then, Andy. - Yeah. 628 00:29:21,622 --> 00:29:23,039 But here's the thing. 629 00:29:23,090 --> 00:29:24,707 I can't have good old Dunder Mifflin to fall back on, 630 00:29:24,758 --> 00:29:25,758 or else I'll never succeed. 631 00:29:25,793 --> 00:29:27,293 Gotta burn those boats! 632 00:29:27,327 --> 00:29:29,011 So I need you to go into my file 633 00:29:29,046 --> 00:29:31,297 and put down that I was fired for theft 634 00:29:31,331 --> 00:29:34,717 and/or groping wieners. 635 00:29:34,768 --> 00:29:36,219 A-Andy, you know I can't do that. 636 00:29:36,270 --> 00:29:38,337 - It'd be lying. - Seriously? 637 00:29:38,355 --> 00:29:41,974 - Yeah, I'm-- - Come on, just do it. 638 00:29:42,008 --> 00:29:44,193 - I can't. - All right, fine. 639 00:29:44,228 --> 00:29:48,815 Just know that you made me do this. 640 00:29:48,849 --> 00:29:50,783 Oh, come on. Andy, no. 641 00:29:50,818 --> 00:29:53,352 God, Toby, don't-- stop blocking my hand. 642 00:29:53,370 --> 00:29:54,353 No, no. 643 00:29:54,371 --> 00:29:55,905 This is your-- you brought this on. 644 00:29:55,956 --> 00:29:58,574 No, no. Andy. 645 00:29:58,625 --> 00:30:00,793 Okay, all right. Groped you good. 646 00:30:00,828 --> 00:30:04,997 Off to Hollywood! 647 00:30:12,055 --> 00:30:13,923 This is Angela. 648 00:30:13,974 --> 00:30:14,924 Oh. 649 00:30:14,975 --> 00:30:16,676 Hello, Miss Polodnikovski. 650 00:30:16,710 --> 00:30:19,896 Uh, how can I help you? 651 00:30:19,930 --> 00:30:21,981 Did my rent check not clear? 652 00:30:22,015 --> 00:30:26,269 Because I just transferred another $25 to that account. 653 00:30:26,303 --> 00:30:28,404 So if there's a problem, it's clearly on your end. 654 00:30:28,439 --> 00:30:30,990 And-- oh. 655 00:30:31,024 --> 00:30:32,692 Oh. Oh, okay. 656 00:30:32,726 --> 00:30:34,160 Good. 657 00:30:34,194 --> 00:30:35,161 Then, um... 658 00:30:35,195 --> 00:30:39,282 what is this about? 659 00:30:39,333 --> 00:30:41,066 No, no. Hey, hey. 660 00:30:41,084 --> 00:30:43,503 No, you are out of line, Miss Polodnikovski. 661 00:30:43,537 --> 00:30:45,621 No. No, you are. 662 00:30:45,656 --> 00:30:47,006 No, you are! 663 00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:48,758 Evicted? Fine! 664 00:30:48,792 --> 00:30:50,843 I don't want to live in that cesspool anyway. 665 00:30:50,878 --> 00:30:53,463 Listen, I get my security deposit back. 666 00:30:53,514 --> 00:30:55,465 Yes, I do. Ye-- 667 00:30:55,516 --> 00:30:58,384 That is not fair! That is not fair! 668 00:30:58,418 --> 00:30:59,435 Well, you know what? 669 00:30:59,470 --> 00:31:01,604 You have so many hairs on your chin, 670 00:31:01,638 --> 00:31:03,806 Animal Control should've taken you away. 671 00:31:03,857 --> 00:31:05,808 That is very unladylike. 672 00:31:05,859 --> 00:31:07,393 You are disgusting! 673 00:31:20,073 --> 00:31:23,159 What do you think that was about? 674 00:31:23,210 --> 00:31:24,494 David. 675 00:31:24,528 --> 00:31:26,112 I lost the Scranton White Pages account. 676 00:31:26,146 --> 00:31:29,315 Do you have any idea how much paper that is? 677 00:31:29,333 --> 00:31:31,033 And I'd just like to point out 678 00:31:31,084 --> 00:31:32,084 I was mad at Dwight. 679 00:31:32,119 --> 00:31:33,169 I did it out of spite. 680 00:31:33,203 --> 00:31:35,505 We put the past behind us, though, Andy. 681 00:31:35,539 --> 00:31:37,623 When have I told you I hate you and this company? 682 00:31:37,657 --> 00:31:39,158 Enough, Andy. Enough! 683 00:31:39,176 --> 00:31:42,828 Just stop forgiving me, David. Please? 684 00:31:42,846 --> 00:31:47,633 This is my last chance to honor what is best inside myself. 685 00:31:47,667 --> 00:31:49,802 What if I took a dump on your new car? 686 00:31:49,836 --> 00:31:50,937 Oh, my God. 687 00:31:50,971 --> 00:31:52,889 Eleanor Roosevelt once said, 688 00:31:52,940 --> 00:31:54,857 "The future belongs to those 689 00:31:54,892 --> 00:31:57,944 who believe in the beauty of their dreams." 690 00:31:57,978 --> 00:32:00,146 I think she's right. 691 00:32:00,180 --> 00:32:02,231 - I feel calm now. - Get out! 692 00:32:02,282 --> 00:32:03,616 Get out! 693 00:32:03,650 --> 00:32:05,684 I feel, like, for the first time 694 00:32:05,702 --> 00:32:09,455 in a long time, I'm doing the right thing. 695 00:32:12,011 --> 00:32:13,511 - Andy. - Yeah. 696 00:32:13,512 --> 00:32:14,896 What are you doing? 697 00:32:14,930 --> 00:32:18,266 Uh, heavy stuff like books on the bottom. 698 00:32:18,317 --> 00:32:20,151 So it won't squash my knickety-knacks on top. 699 00:32:20,185 --> 00:32:22,103 Yeah, okay, that's not what I mean. 700 00:32:23,488 --> 00:32:26,407 You don't have to leave because you said you would. 701 00:32:26,441 --> 00:32:30,778 Don't let pride ruin your whole life. 702 00:32:30,829 --> 00:32:32,330 Okay? 703 00:32:32,364 --> 00:32:35,583 It's not worth it. 704 00:32:35,617 --> 00:32:37,251 Wow. 705 00:32:37,286 --> 00:32:38,753 Angela. 706 00:32:38,787 --> 00:32:40,588 What we had was great, 707 00:32:40,622 --> 00:32:43,090 and, honestly, I think about it a lot too... 708 00:32:43,125 --> 00:32:44,175 Ugh. 709 00:32:44,209 --> 00:32:46,544 But I just-- it's in the past. 710 00:32:46,578 --> 00:32:48,429 - And I feel like we shouldn't... - No, that's not-- 711 00:32:48,463 --> 00:32:50,848 - Rehash-- - No, none-- no, stop. 712 00:32:50,882 --> 00:32:53,551 It's just-- 713 00:32:53,585 --> 00:32:55,636 - Exactly. - Okay. 714 00:32:55,687 --> 00:33:00,358 Well, have a good trip. 715 00:33:00,392 --> 00:33:02,977 Good luck, Andy. 716 00:33:03,028 --> 00:33:04,779 Thanks, Angela. You too. 717 00:33:04,813 --> 00:33:05,813 Thanks. 718 00:33:05,864 --> 00:33:09,200 A-bridge a-burnt. 719 00:33:09,234 --> 00:33:11,268 No turning back now. 720 00:33:11,286 --> 00:33:14,538 Everybody, Lorelei and I 721 00:33:14,573 --> 00:33:17,441 would like to say thank you and good-bye 722 00:33:17,459 --> 00:33:18,776 the only way we know how. 723 00:33:18,794 --> 00:33:21,796 - Oh, good lord. - Can't you just leave? 724 00:33:21,830 --> 00:33:24,665 You know, Andy, you could just say a really nice good-bye. 725 00:33:24,716 --> 00:33:26,467 Tuna, I'm a performer, 726 00:33:26,501 --> 00:33:29,453 and perform I shall. 727 00:33:37,229 --> 00:33:44,134 ♪ I will remember you ♪ 728 00:33:44,152 --> 00:33:50,324 ♪ Will you remember me? ♪ 729 00:33:50,359 --> 00:33:53,861 ♪ Don't let your life ♪ 730 00:33:53,912 --> 00:33:56,480 ♪ pass you by ♪ 731 00:33:56,498 --> 00:34:03,320 ♪ and weep not for the memories ♪ 732 00:34:03,338 --> 00:34:06,957 ♪ Remember all the good times ♪ 733 00:34:06,991 --> 00:34:09,510 ♪ that we had ♪ 734 00:34:09,544 --> 00:34:12,430 ♪ I let them slip away from us ♪ 735 00:34:12,464 --> 00:34:15,933 ♪ when things got bad ♪ 736 00:34:15,967 --> 00:34:19,303 ♪ How clearly I first saw you ♪ 737 00:34:19,337 --> 00:34:22,189 ♪ smilin' in the sun ♪ 738 00:34:22,224 --> 00:34:25,776 ♪ Want to feel your warmth upon me ♪ 739 00:34:25,811 --> 00:34:29,179 ♪ I wanna be the one ♪ 740 00:34:29,197 --> 00:34:32,199 ♪ I will remember you ♪ 741 00:34:32,234 --> 00:34:34,702 You okay? 742 00:34:34,736 --> 00:34:36,186 It's just a really nice song. 743 00:34:36,204 --> 00:34:41,792 ♪ Will you remember me? ♪ 744 00:34:41,827 --> 00:34:45,329 ♪ Don't let your life ♪ 745 00:34:45,363 --> 00:34:48,165 ♪ pass you by ♪ 746 00:34:48,199 --> 00:34:54,221 ♪ and weep not for the memories ♪ 747 00:34:54,256 --> 00:34:57,892 ♪ Don't let your life ♪ 748 00:34:57,926 --> 00:35:02,045 ♪ pass you by ♪ 749 00:35:02,064 --> 00:35:06,851 ♪ and weep not for the memories ♪ 750 00:35:14,242 --> 00:35:15,493 Awesome. 751 00:35:15,527 --> 00:35:18,228 Nice! 752 00:35:18,246 --> 00:35:22,450 Thanks, Meredith. 753 00:35:22,501 --> 00:35:24,118 - Mm. - Who knows? 754 00:35:24,169 --> 00:35:26,337 Maybe Andy will make it. 755 00:35:26,371 --> 00:35:28,372 - He's not terrible. - Yeah. 756 00:35:28,406 --> 00:35:30,407 And people worse than him make it all the time, 757 00:35:30,425 --> 00:35:31,909 like Lil' Romeo. 758 00:35:31,943 --> 00:35:33,094 No, he's good. 759 00:35:33,128 --> 00:35:35,463 Hewasgood. 760 00:35:43,726 --> 00:35:46,945 - Good night, Kevin. - Night, Oscar. 761 00:35:59,492 --> 00:36:02,160 Tents? 762 00:36:02,211 --> 00:36:04,162 Are you thinking of going camping? 763 00:36:04,213 --> 00:36:06,281 I thought you found nature vulgar. 764 00:36:06,299 --> 00:36:09,918 Well, I've changed my mind. 765 00:36:09,952 --> 00:36:12,787 Wait a minute, Angela. 766 00:36:12,805 --> 00:36:15,257 You're not thinking of living in a tent-- 767 00:36:15,291 --> 00:36:19,728 Oh, God, would you just mind your own business? 768 00:36:19,762 --> 00:36:22,130 Okay, listen. I'm just gonna say this. 769 00:36:22,148 --> 00:36:24,316 You are not going to live in a tent. 770 00:36:24,350 --> 00:36:28,770 - Oh, God. - Come stay with me. 771 00:36:28,804 --> 00:36:30,972 You don't want me at your place. 772 00:36:30,990 --> 00:36:32,974 I do. Yes. 773 00:36:32,992 --> 00:36:36,361 Not forever, but u-until you get back on your feet, 774 00:36:36,412 --> 00:36:38,280 which won't be long. 775 00:36:38,314 --> 00:36:40,115 It's the least I can do. 776 00:36:40,149 --> 00:36:43,151 Well... 777 00:36:45,922 --> 00:36:47,706 Separate bathrooms. 778 00:36:55,164 --> 00:36:58,350 Thank you. 779 00:36:58,384 --> 00:36:59,384 You're welcome. 780 00:36:59,435 --> 00:37:01,353 Let's go get Philip. 781 00:37:01,387 --> 00:37:04,022 - Then, we'll get your stuff... - Okay. 782 00:37:04,056 --> 00:37:05,774 And you get the hell out of that place. 783 00:37:05,808 --> 00:37:08,443 Okay. 784 00:37:08,478 --> 00:37:10,145 Are you allowed to have pets? 785 00:37:10,179 --> 00:37:12,680 Oh, Angela. 786 00:37:12,698 --> 00:37:15,951 Yesterday, I was just your average, ordinary paper salesman 787 00:37:15,985 --> 00:37:19,821 with a farm and a bunch of pipe dreams about beet fuel. 788 00:37:19,855 --> 00:37:25,026 Today, I leave here a regional manager with a black belt. 789 00:37:25,044 --> 00:37:26,378 Ah! 790 00:37:26,412 --> 00:37:28,547 It really is amazing how your life can change 791 00:37:28,581 --> 00:37:30,782 in one day. 792 00:37:33,803 --> 00:37:34,920 You talk to Wade and Colin? 793 00:37:34,971 --> 00:37:36,171 No, I just saw I missed their call. 794 00:37:36,205 --> 00:37:37,372 Why? What's up? 795 00:37:37,390 --> 00:37:38,390 We got an offer on the table. 796 00:37:38,424 --> 00:37:40,475 - What kind of offer? - A buyout. 797 00:37:40,510 --> 00:37:41,876 - What? - We're in play, baby. 798 00:37:41,894 --> 00:37:43,595 - Oh, my God. - We did it. 799 00:37:43,646 --> 00:37:45,230 - We did it! - Ah, ha, ha, ha, ho! 800 00:37:45,264 --> 00:37:46,714 Hey, and look. 801 00:37:46,732 --> 00:37:48,804 The buyers wanna make sure it's not just a Philly play. 802 00:37:48,919 --> 00:37:50,902 - Okay. - So get this. 803 00:37:50,937 --> 00:37:54,656 They're gonna pay for us to go pitch out west. 804 00:37:54,690 --> 00:37:58,944 We talking spurs, the jazz, cowboys. 805 00:37:58,995 --> 00:38:01,329 Blake Griffin, baby. 806 00:38:01,364 --> 00:38:03,899 - Wow, that is... - Yeah. 807 00:38:03,933 --> 00:38:05,500 - Wow. - We did it. 808 00:38:05,535 --> 00:38:08,003 Yeah, we did it. 809 00:38:08,037 --> 00:38:10,205 Hey, how long-- how long do we think that's gonna take? 810 00:38:10,239 --> 00:38:13,291 Wade said we could do the whole country in three months. 811 00:38:13,342 --> 00:38:16,411 Oh, man. 812 00:38:16,429 --> 00:38:18,880 Yeah, I can't do it. 813 00:38:18,914 --> 00:38:21,049 Can't do what? 814 00:38:21,083 --> 00:38:25,237 This, man. I-I can't do this to Pam. 815 00:38:25,271 --> 00:38:27,422 No, no. Jim, this is different. 816 00:38:27,440 --> 00:38:29,224 This is everything. 817 00:38:29,258 --> 00:38:31,493 I know. 818 00:38:31,527 --> 00:38:35,530 And I-- and I can't do it. 819 00:39:00,289 --> 00:39:03,892 So is your place all bachelor, slobby, and gross? 820 00:39:03,926 --> 00:39:05,644 Nope, it's neat and tastefully appointed 821 00:39:05,678 --> 00:39:07,262 like most gay men's homes. 822 00:39:07,296 --> 00:39:09,014 The stereotype holds up. 823 00:39:09,065 --> 00:39:13,068 I wouldn't know. I never lived with a gay guy. 824 00:39:13,102 --> 00:39:16,438 Angela, you just were-- 825 00:39:18,991 --> 00:39:23,194 I love him. 826 00:39:23,246 --> 00:39:25,914 I know. 827 00:39:25,948 --> 00:39:27,249 I understand more than most, 828 00:39:27,283 --> 00:39:29,768 but we both have to move on. 829 00:39:29,802 --> 00:39:32,787 You-- you can't-- c-- 830 00:39:32,821 --> 00:39:36,241 No, not the Senator. 831 00:39:36,275 --> 00:39:38,510 I love Dwight. 832 00:39:48,983 --> 00:39:53,952 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com