1
00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:09,633
(BOTH GREETlNG lN SPANlSH)

2
00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:11,677
(PHONE RlNGlNG)

3
00:00:11,761 --> 00:00:12,720
Hello, Dunder Mifflin.

4
00:00:12,804 --> 00:00:14,221
No, no, no. No.

5
00:00:14,305 --> 00:00:15,973
(SPEAKlNG SPANlSH)

6
00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:19,685
l believe that every
man, woman, and child
in this country

7
00:00:19,769 --> 00:00:21,186
should learn how
to speak Spanish.

8
00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:25,524
They are our neighbors
to the south, and this
would be a healing thing

9
00:00:26,276 --> 00:00:28,360
for all of North America.

10
00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:33,949
And l am going
on vacation next
week to Cancún.

11
00:00:34,325 --> 00:00:38,245
(GREETlNG lN SPANlSH)

12
00:00:38,329 --> 00:00:39,788
(CHATTERlNG lN SPANlSH)

13
00:00:44,335 --> 00:00:45,502
(LAUGHS UNCOMFORTABLY)

14
00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:47,046
(GREETlNG lN SPANlSH)

15
00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:48,505
(GREETlNG lN GERMAN)

16
00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:51,383
l don't understand
why Michael is wasting
his time with Spanish.

17
00:00:51,468 --> 00:00:53,886
l have it on very
good authority that
within 20 years,

18
00:00:53,970 --> 00:00:56,388
everyone will be
speaking German.

19
00:00:56,806 --> 00:00:58,891
Or a Chinese-German hybrid.

20
00:00:59,476 --> 00:01:01,143
(SPEAKlNG SPANlSH lNCORRECTLY)

21
00:01:01,978 --> 00:01:03,437
(CORRECTlNG lN SPANlSH)

22
00:01:04,355 --> 00:01:08,108
Michael's having
a hard time with the
gender part of Spanish.

23
00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:09,735
So, l told him
to mark everything

24
00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:12,362
with the international
symbol for gender.

25
00:01:12,447 --> 00:01:13,614
And. . .

26
00:01:15,408 --> 00:01:17,326
l should have been
more specific.

27
00:01:17,494 --> 00:01:19,870
Your office is full
of genitalia.

28
00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:22,414
(SPEAKlNG SPANlSH)

29
00:01:23,833 --> 00:01:24,875
"That's what he says"?

30
00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:26,168
Damn it.
(KNOCK AT DOOR)

31
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:27,920
Ah, Angelo!

32
00:01:28,004 --> 00:01:29,088
Angela.

33
00:01:31,049 --> 00:01:33,050
Michael.
(SPEAKlNG SPANlSH)

34
00:01:35,637 --> 00:01:36,845
(SCOFFS)

35
00:01:58,076 --> 00:02:02,246
All right, so l'll finish up
on bulk pricing and then you
go into delivery guarantees.

36
00:02:02,330 --> 00:02:05,791
You know, maybe
there's an opportunity
for a joke there, like. . .

37
00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:08,377
Like, "l just
delivered a baby.

38
00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:11,380
"They didn't offer
me a guarantee."

39
00:02:11,923 --> 00:02:13,632
Yeah. Maybe we don't
even need that.

40
00:02:13,716 --> 00:02:16,802
Can you smell the power?
Halperts, power couple.

41
00:02:16,928 --> 00:02:18,720
You know what?
l should be getting
this client, Michael.

42
00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:20,347
My numbers are better
than either of theirs.

43
00:02:20,431 --> 00:02:23,350
l went with the people
l thought would put the
best face on the company.

44
00:02:23,434 --> 00:02:25,811
lf you want people
to put the best face
on something,

45
00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:26,937
why would you
get two people

46
00:02:27,021 --> 00:02:30,858
who probably have
never cut the face off
of anything in their lives?

47
00:02:30,942 --> 00:02:31,942
lt's a good point.

48
00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:34,319
This is our first
joint sales pitch.

49
00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:35,863
l think we're gonna work
really well together.

50
00:02:35,947 --> 00:02:38,824
Yeah. l think we have
complementary strengths.

51
00:02:38,908 --> 00:02:39,867
We understand
each other.

52
00:02:39,951 --> 00:02:41,785
We have good
give and take.

53
00:02:41,870 --> 00:02:43,495
l give, he takes!

54
00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:47,166
l don't even know
who you are anymore.

55
00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:48,333
(EXCLAlMS)

56
00:02:51,379 --> 00:02:54,548
Hi. Donna Newton.
Here to see Michael Scott.

57
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:58,760
Hey, Miss Newton. Hi.
l'm Jim. How are you?

58
00:02:58,845 --> 00:03:01,221
Did somebody order
a hooker over here?

59
00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:02,347
Stop that. Hi.

60
00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:03,724
Hi. How are you?

61
00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:05,809
There's this woman
l met a few weeks ago.

62
00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:09,354
Her name is Donna.
Manager of a Sid
and Dexter's.

63
00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:13,525
And right now,
we're in the midst of
a passionate love affair.

64
00:03:15,737 --> 00:03:19,740
No, but she is coming
by today, maybe to buy
some printers, so. . .

65
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,869
Right here, we have
the wonder twins,
Jim and Pam Halpert.

66
00:03:23,953 --> 00:03:25,579
They will be
assisting you today.

67
00:03:25,663 --> 00:03:27,664
You look exactly alike.

68
00:03:27,749 --> 00:03:29,166
No, we're
actually married.

69
00:03:29,250 --> 00:03:30,500
We're not
brother and sister.

70
00:03:30,585 --> 00:03:32,419
l have a sense
about these things.
All right.

71
00:03:32,503 --> 00:03:36,757
You have some ancestors
in common somewhere back.

72
00:03:37,008 --> 00:03:39,635
l knew it.
You should see
their baby.

73
00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:45,515
So, yes, laser printers
are more expensive, but
they cost less to operate,

74
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:46,767
so it's a trade-off.

75
00:03:46,851 --> 00:03:48,602
(KNOCKlNG AT DOOR)
Hi. Sorry to interrupt.

76
00:03:48,978 --> 00:03:51,521
Little time sensitive.
Do you, Donna,
by any chance

77
00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:53,106
shop at Victoria's Secret?
What?

78
00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:56,360
Because l keep
getting these magazines
sent to me

79
00:03:56,778 --> 00:04:00,906
via the address of the woman
who used to live in my condo
before me.

80
00:04:00,990 --> 00:04:02,241
None of this
is time sensitive.

81
00:04:02,325 --> 00:04:04,743
Yes, the sale's on
now through May.

82
00:04:04,827 --> 00:04:05,911
Oh, yeah, thank you.

83
00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:07,412
Okay. l have more of them.

84
00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:11,375
You would have weekly
conference calls with
executives in corporate,

85
00:04:11,459 --> 00:04:14,294
a two week training
program at the Yale
School of Management.

86
00:04:14,379 --> 00:04:18,131
Obviously you would be
high on the list for
advancement opportunities.

87
00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:19,258
Sounds all right.

88
00:04:19,342 --> 00:04:20,509
What is this?

89
00:04:20,593 --> 00:04:22,094
This is Print
ln All Colors,

90
00:04:22,178 --> 00:04:25,055
Sabre's minority
executive training program.

91
00:04:25,139 --> 00:04:27,432
(SCOFFS) lt doesn't
just sound "aite,"
it sounds amazing.

92
00:04:27,517 --> 00:04:28,809
l didn't say "aite."

93
00:04:28,893 --> 00:04:30,102
How do l apply?

94
00:04:30,186 --> 00:04:31,812
You have to be a minority.

95
00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:34,606
Glasses wearers,
cholera survivors,

96
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,943


97
00:04:38,027 --> 00:04:39,444
You want me to keep going?
Those don't really count.

98
00:04:39,529 --> 00:04:42,531
We're thinking more ethnic
and racial minorities.

99
00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:44,825
Come here. Come here.

100
00:04:45,618 --> 00:04:48,370
Ten seconds ago
this guy was driving
a forklift, okay?

101
00:04:48,454 --> 00:04:53,292
Now, all of a sudden,
he's Cinderella of the office?
What are you guys thinking?

102
00:04:53,584 --> 00:04:55,585
l like the sound of this.

103
00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:58,630
Maybe one day
l'll be sitting
in Michael's chair.

104
00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:00,424
Wouldn't that be something?

105
00:05:00,508 --> 00:05:03,385
DWlGHT: One minority
from this branch is going
to get into this program.

106
00:05:03,636 --> 00:05:05,637
Who would l prefer? Hmm.

107
00:05:06,222 --> 00:05:09,766
The competent hardworking one
who does things his own way,

108
00:05:10,101 --> 00:05:14,563
or the malleable simpleton
who can be bought for
a few fashion magazines?

109
00:05:15,231 --> 00:05:18,066
This is the second time
that you've sent me
the wrong size.

110
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:19,526
l mean, l know what
a four should feel like.

111
00:05:19,610 --> 00:05:21,111
l've been a four
my whole life.

112
00:05:21,195 --> 00:05:24,489
You know what?
You can go to hell, all right?
Thanks for nothing.

113
00:05:24,574 --> 00:05:27,659
Oh, man.
White people, right?

114
00:05:27,744 --> 00:05:28,785
l don't know
if she was white.

115
00:05:29,037 --> 00:05:31,163
Well, you can kind of
tell from their voice.

116
00:05:31,247 --> 00:05:32,331
Yeah.

117
00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:35,667
l bet you get pulled over
by the cops a lot just
because of your race.

118
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:38,545
Well, they say
it's because of texting,
but maybe you're right.

119
00:05:38,629 --> 00:05:42,674
l think you should consider
applying for the executive
minority training program.

120
00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:44,885
l never thought of myself
as an executive before.

121
00:05:44,969 --> 00:05:46,845
l know, 'cause you
have no role models.

122
00:05:46,929 --> 00:05:49,681
How many lndian CEOs
can you think of?

123
00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:51,850
l can't think of
any CEOs, any race.

124
00:05:51,934 --> 00:05:54,269
You could be
the lndian Bill Gates.

125
00:05:55,104 --> 00:05:57,647
You could be
the lndian Ted Turner.

126
00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:01,902
l could be
the lndian Julia Roberts.

127
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:05,614
That's not. . . She's. . .
Okay. Yes.

128
00:06:06,574 --> 00:06:10,077
l took the liberty to scan
a few things earlier,
and l want to show you. . .

129
00:06:10,161 --> 00:06:13,747
There we go!
Look at those vivid colors.
Look at my eyes.

130
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:15,707
Those are
Shrek-green eyes.

131
00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:20,379
That is me again.
l think this displays
the crisp, dazzling white.

132
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:22,881
And that would
be a display

133
00:06:22,965 --> 00:06:24,091
of the crisp,
gorgeous black.

134
00:06:24,175 --> 00:06:25,300
DONNA: Yeah.

135
00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:28,637
lt's subtle.
lt's how it works.

136
00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:30,847
I show her an image
that turns her on,

137
00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:32,891
and then she looks at me,
then she looks at the image,

138
00:06:32,975 --> 00:06:34,351
then back at me,
then back at the image.

139
00:06:34,435 --> 00:06:37,396
Soon she doesn't
know what is me,
what is the image,

140
00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:39,481
she just knows
that she's turned on.

141
00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:43,902
This is a place that
l like to go to be
alone with my thoughts.

142
00:06:43,986 --> 00:06:46,613
l've never taken
anybody there before.

143
00:06:46,739 --> 00:06:48,740
Who took the photo?
Ryan.

144
00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:49,866
Oh.

145
00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:51,952
And that's it.

146
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:56,248
That's me.
That's who l am.

147
00:06:56,916 --> 00:06:59,000
Not bad.

148
00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:00,544
Oh, thanks.

149
00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:02,587
You're not bad, either.

150
00:07:02,672 --> 00:07:03,839
Thank you.

151
00:07:07,552 --> 00:07:09,261
(CLEARlNG THROAT)

152
00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:12,097
Oh, my God.

153
00:07:12,181 --> 00:07:14,474
Jim, could you come
in here for a sec?

154
00:07:15,726 --> 00:07:18,061
What was that printer
we were looking at?

155
00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,023
You didn't see it, Pam.

156
00:07:22,191 --> 00:07:24,693
She was giving me all
sorts of signals that she
wanted me to make a move.

157
00:07:24,777 --> 00:07:25,819
Shortbread?
No.

158
00:07:25,903 --> 00:07:27,320
l'll have one.

159
00:07:27,405 --> 00:07:29,823
Well, maybe
you shouldn't try
to kiss people at work.

160
00:07:29,907 --> 00:07:32,325
Oh, really, Jim?
What about Pam?

161
00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:34,411
And you did a heck
of a lot more than kiss.

162
00:07:34,495 --> 00:07:35,787
Maybe this could
be my Pam.

163
00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:37,372
Okay, well,
all that is irrelevant. . .

164
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,499
Maybe Michael
has a point.

165
00:07:39,834 --> 00:07:43,837
l mean,
if she was really that upset,
she wouldn't still be here.

166
00:07:44,255 --> 00:07:46,214
Was it professional? No.

167
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:50,719
But l work
in the nightlife industry.
l get hit on all the time.

168
00:07:50,803 --> 00:07:53,930
ln my 20s,
it would've been annoying.

169
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:56,057
ln my late 20s,
l find it really flattering.

170
00:07:56,851 --> 00:07:58,810
Look, l know that
l screwed up in there.

171
00:07:58,895 --> 00:08:00,562
l know that l probably
messed up your sale.

172
00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:02,105
l just want to go
in and fix it.

173
00:08:02,190 --> 00:08:04,691
What if l back out
and you finish
the pitch with Jim?

174
00:08:04,775 --> 00:08:05,901
What?

175
00:08:06,569 --> 00:08:08,195
What was that?
Just let him flirt with her.

176
00:08:08,279 --> 00:08:10,197
People meet each
other all sorts of ways.

177
00:08:10,281 --> 00:08:13,200
Pam, you know he's not
gonna get anywhere and
he's gonna blow our sale.

178
00:08:13,284 --> 00:08:14,659
Who cares?
lt's not that huge a sale.

179
00:08:14,744 --> 00:08:17,829
Hey, the Schwab guy
told us to treat every sale
like it was a huge sale.

180
00:08:17,914 --> 00:08:21,291
Don't act like you understood
anything that guy said.

181
00:08:22,877 --> 00:08:24,586
Good luck, wingman.

182
00:08:27,298 --> 00:08:29,841
How has being
a minority affected you?

183
00:08:29,926 --> 00:08:31,510
Well, there's
a lot of pressure
from my parents

184
00:08:31,594 --> 00:08:33,887
to settle down
and marry an lndian guy.

185
00:08:33,971 --> 00:08:36,306
Oh, good. And you
resent this because. . .

186
00:08:36,390 --> 00:08:40,018
lndian guys always wear
their cell phones outside
their pants. lt's so dorky.

187
00:08:40,102 --> 00:08:44,773
No, no, no. That's not dorky.
Look, it's easily accessible.
Boom. Like this.

188
00:08:45,107 --> 00:08:47,609
91 1 , hello.
Scranton Strangler's
in the house.

189
00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:49,319
lnside the house!

190
00:08:50,238 --> 00:08:52,113
Just put it
in your pocket.

191
00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:53,615
(CHATTERlNG)

192
00:08:53,699 --> 00:08:56,910
Look at that.
She's totally
flirting with him.

193
00:08:57,078 --> 00:09:00,872
You don't know that.
Some people can't
help oozing sexuality.

194
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,917
You ever notice
you can only ooze
two things?

195
00:09:04,001 --> 00:09:06,962
Sexuality and pus.
Man, l tell you.

196
00:09:07,505 --> 00:09:09,839
She just crossed
her arms together.
That's bad.

197
00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:14,261
Maybe she's just pushing
her breasts together
to make them look bigger.

198
00:09:18,849 --> 00:09:19,975
Like that?

199
00:09:20,059 --> 00:09:22,477
ls this the best
you can do right now?

200
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:23,979
For that printer, yes.

201
00:09:24,146 --> 00:09:26,565
Unfortunately
we don't have
a lot of flexibility.

202
00:09:26,649 --> 00:09:30,402
Oh. Well, l guess
l'm just used to the
restaurant business where,

203
00:09:30,486 --> 00:09:33,238
if you're in charge
then you can always
get discounts

204
00:09:33,322 --> 00:09:34,489
for the people
that you like.

205
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:35,824
JlM: Yeah.

206
00:09:36,367 --> 00:09:38,952
Maybe we can find
a little wiggle room, right?

207
00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:40,078
What's that?

208
00:09:40,162 --> 00:09:41,746
Maybe we can find
some wiggle room.
(SlGHlNG)

209
00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:42,956
l don't. . .
l don't think so.

210
00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:44,916
l think we could.

211
00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:50,463
l don't see how we could
possibly sell these for that
little without losing money.

212
00:09:50,548 --> 00:09:52,048
Delivery alone will cost. . .

213
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:53,341
Okay, well, sometimes,

214
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:58,638
sometimes it makes financial
sense to lose money, right?
Like, for tax purposes.

215
00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:01,933
Actually, l ran
the numbers on this,
and in this case,

216
00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:03,768
it makes more financial
sense to gain money.

217
00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:04,894
Why don't you
run them again?

218
00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:07,272
What if she's just
flirting with you
to get a better price?

219
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,481
lf she is,
it's working.

220
00:10:08,566 --> 00:10:12,485
Yeah, Michael, here's a trick.
Ask her if she wants a mint.

221
00:10:12,945 --> 00:10:16,781
lf she says no,
then she is not
interested.

222
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:18,700
She does not like him.

223
00:10:18,784 --> 00:10:23,455
You can flirt with someone
to get what you want and
also be attracted to them.

224
00:10:23,539 --> 00:10:24,914
How do you think
we got together?

225
00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:26,750
'Cause l stopped
by your desk, like,
1 5 times a day.

226
00:10:26,834 --> 00:10:28,627
l was after your money.

227
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:29,919
Well, the joke was on you.

228
00:10:30,004 --> 00:10:31,379
Yes, it was.

229
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:33,715
Can you stop
micromanaging?

230
00:10:33,841 --> 00:10:35,634
l know how to do this.
You're yelling. . .
Okay. Okay.

231
00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:36,718
What are you guys doing?

232
00:10:36,802 --> 00:10:38,511
This girl was really rude
to me at the mall,

233
00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:41,473
so l created a fake lM
account from a hot guy
at her high school,

234
00:10:41,557 --> 00:10:42,974
and now l'm trying
to make her anorexic.

235
00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:45,310
Tell her everyone
in homeroom
thinks she's fat.

236
00:10:45,394 --> 00:10:46,394
KELLY: That is so good.

237
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,563
You know, we really
should keep practicing
for this interview.

238
00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:50,106
Oh, that's okay.
Ryan coached me.

239
00:10:50,191 --> 00:10:52,025
Ryan? What does he know?

240
00:10:52,109 --> 00:10:54,152
lt's easy. You just
turn every question
around on them.

241
00:10:54,236 --> 00:10:56,029
Do you think you're
treated differently
because of your race?

242
00:10:56,113 --> 00:10:58,782
Would you ask
that same question
if l was white?

243
00:10:58,866 --> 00:11:00,575
We're so in.
We?

244
00:11:01,035 --> 00:11:03,370
When l become executive,
l'm gonna make Ryan manager.

245
00:11:03,454 --> 00:11:06,289
And then the two of us
are cleaning house.

246
00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,917
DWIGHT: Kelly will be
even worse than Darryl.

247
00:11:09,251 --> 00:11:10,377
lf you'd have told
me this morning

248
00:11:10,461 --> 00:11:14,172
that today l'd be creating
a monster capable
of my own destruction,

249
00:11:14,256 --> 00:11:18,176
l'd have thought you were
referring to the bull Mose
and l are trying to reanimate.

250
00:11:18,427 --> 00:11:23,223
"So, corporate approval
of this contract is contingent
upon buyer and seller

251
00:11:23,307 --> 00:11:26,142
"obtaining. . ."
Blah-de-blah-de-blah.

252
00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:29,479
"Boilerplate,
pound of fish."
Just kidding.

253
00:11:30,481 --> 00:11:32,440
Do you like mints?
Yes.

254
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,359
l carry mints
with me sometimes.

255
00:11:34,443 --> 00:11:35,610
Oh, l haven't
tried those.

256
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:36,695
Ever tried those?
No.

257
00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:37,821
They're good.

258
00:11:37,905 --> 00:11:38,947
You want one?

259
00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:42,033
Sure.
lt's like. . .

260
00:11:43,452 --> 00:11:47,205
"Cool. . . Certified cool."
l like how they
say "certified."

261
00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:51,042
Like there's some
consortium of. . .

262
00:11:53,462 --> 00:11:54,546
Michael !

263
00:11:54,630 --> 00:11:55,797
l'm sorry.

264
00:11:56,966 --> 00:11:58,383
l can't stop myself
from kissing her.

265
00:11:58,467 --> 00:12:02,512
Yeah. Now you know
how l feel sitting next
to those M&M's all day.

266
00:12:02,888 --> 00:12:04,305
Well, why don't you
just move the M&M's?

267
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:05,807
Why don't you shut up?

268
00:12:05,891 --> 00:12:10,019
Okay. Guys, guys, guys,
just tell me it's not totally
insane to try one more time.

269
00:12:10,104 --> 00:12:11,104
lt is totally insane.

270
00:12:11,188 --> 00:12:13,732
Michael, he's right.
You are turning
into a stalker.

271
00:12:13,816 --> 00:12:15,650
(SlGHlNG) Okay.
What do you think?

272
00:12:16,026 --> 00:12:17,360
l think it's over, man.

273
00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:18,820
Andy?

274
00:12:19,655 --> 00:12:21,156
(GROANlNG)

275
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:22,282
Okay, some for,
some against.

276
00:12:22,366 --> 00:12:23,408
Nobody's for.

277
00:12:23,492 --> 00:12:24,534
Pam.
Hmm?

278
00:12:24,618 --> 00:12:25,702
What do you think?

279
00:12:27,496 --> 00:12:28,705
l think it's really,
really unlikely.

280
00:12:28,789 --> 00:12:29,789
Okay.

281
00:12:29,874 --> 00:12:31,499
Really unlikely.

282
00:12:32,209 --> 00:12:33,752
But l can't say
that it's impossible.

283
00:12:33,836 --> 00:12:35,044
What?

284
00:12:35,212 --> 00:12:37,213
l'm not saying
she's in love with him,

285
00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:39,591
but she could have
left a while ago.

286
00:12:39,675 --> 00:12:43,094
Most printer sales
are done over the phone,
Miss Boob Shirt.

287
00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:44,846
l'm going
with Pam's group.

288
00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:46,848
Wait. Michael.

289
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:49,392
Okay.
Michael. Michael.

290
00:12:49,477 --> 00:12:53,438
No. Guys, guys, guys, guys,
just thank you for talking.

291
00:12:54,690 --> 00:12:56,357
Wish me luck.
JlM: No.

292
00:12:56,692 --> 00:12:59,486
What sort of movie
would Rudy have been
if he had just stopped

293
00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:02,030
and given up
after two rejections?

294
00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:07,285
Would have been a lot shorter,
probably been a lot funnier,

295
00:13:07,369 --> 00:13:10,663
but it would have
ultimately been
a disappointment.

296
00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:16,544
l still would have seen it,
but that's not the point.

297
00:13:19,548 --> 00:13:21,841
Kelly is disqualified.
What?

298
00:13:22,051 --> 00:13:24,010
You said the program
is not open to Caucasians.

299
00:13:24,094 --> 00:13:27,931
Well, anthropologically,
she is lndian.

300
00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:31,142
lndians migrated
from the Caucasus
region of Europe.

301
00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:34,521
Therefore, technically,
she is Caucasian.
You're welcome, America.

302
00:13:34,605 --> 00:13:36,105
Yeah, but she's
not white, though.

303
00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:38,566
Well, obviously
she's brownish,

304
00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:41,611
but come on.
l mean, Darryl is
far more ethnic.

305
00:13:41,695 --> 00:13:43,488
Darryl withdrew
his application.

306
00:13:43,572 --> 00:13:48,409
The dates of the Yale program
interfered with his softball
league, so he's gone.

307
00:13:49,119 --> 00:13:51,704
l got my whole life
to be a minority executive.

308
00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:54,457
l only have about
a year left in
these knees, though.

309
00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:56,501
So Kelly is
the only applicant.

310
00:13:56,585 --> 00:13:58,586
Yeah, unless somebody
else applies today.

311
00:13:58,671 --> 00:13:59,921
(GREETlNG lN HlNDl)

312
00:14:01,966 --> 00:14:04,592
Oh, dear God. Okay.

313
00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:09,848
Don't make any
decisions just yet. Okay?
l'll be right back.

314
00:14:11,433 --> 00:14:12,559
Hello.

315
00:14:12,643 --> 00:14:15,144
That's very nice.
l never noticed
that before.

316
00:14:15,229 --> 00:14:16,855
Sometimes my bangs cover it.

317
00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:21,192
Yeah. l don't want
to be offensive, but may
l ask you what that means?

318
00:14:21,277 --> 00:14:23,778
l do find that offensive,
actually.

319
00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:27,782
We should have
your contract done
by Thursday.

320
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:31,202
Oh, great! Great.
l will look out
for that stuff, then.

321
00:14:31,287 --> 00:14:32,787
Okay.
And. . .

322
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:37,709
You know, l just wanted to say
it was really, really nice
to do business with you.

323
00:14:37,793 --> 00:14:40,670
Yeah. lt was nice
to do business
with you, too.

324
00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:42,088
Thank you.

325
00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:44,924
Did l get everything?

326
00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:46,050
l don't know.

327
00:14:46,135 --> 00:14:47,218
l think so.

328
00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:48,386
Yeah, l think so.

329
00:14:49,138 --> 00:14:50,221
Okay.

330
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:54,893
So. . . Oh ! Donna?
DONNA: Yeah.

331
00:14:54,977 --> 00:14:57,645
Do you need validation?
We don't validate.

332
00:14:57,730 --> 00:14:58,897
No. lt's just
in the lot, so. . .

333
00:14:58,981 --> 00:15:00,064
Thank you so much.

334
00:15:00,149 --> 00:15:03,902
You're welcome.
You're welcome.

335
00:15:04,361 --> 00:15:05,528
Mmm.

336
00:15:06,864 --> 00:15:07,947
Bye.

337
00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:12,952
(CLEARlNG THROAT)
So, if you have. . .

338
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:14,913
lf there's any
other questions
that you have. . .

339
00:15:14,997 --> 00:15:18,666
l don't have any
other questions.

340
00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:22,921
l'm just gonna make
my way down to. . .

341
00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:24,547
MlCHAEL: Okay.
All right. Bye.

342
00:15:24,632 --> 00:15:25,757
DONNA: Bye-bye.

343
00:15:25,841 --> 00:15:27,091
Have a good elevator ride.

344
00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:28,217
DONNA: Okay.

345
00:15:30,554 --> 00:15:32,472
What's that out there?

346
00:15:37,102 --> 00:15:39,020
Michael,
how did it go?

347
00:15:42,316 --> 00:15:45,818
How would one of you feel
if l told you l could
put you on a fast track

348
00:15:45,903 --> 00:15:48,154
to an executive position
at this company?

349
00:15:48,238 --> 00:15:50,281
Holy cow.
l'd be so happy.

350
00:15:50,532 --> 00:15:51,908
l wasn't talking to you,
pale face.

351
00:15:51,992 --> 00:15:53,785
l know. l meant
l'd be happy for them.

352
00:15:53,869 --> 00:15:58,081
What l'm offering is a ticket
on a bullet train straight
to middle management.

353
00:15:58,165 --> 00:16:00,375
Dwight, l know
these programs.

354
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:04,545
Every color is important,
because together
we make a rainbow.

355
00:16:04,713 --> 00:16:05,713
Yes.

356
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:07,090
l'll slap you in the
face with a rainbow.

357
00:16:07,174 --> 00:16:08,549
Mmm.

358
00:16:09,218 --> 00:16:13,471
Speaking of rainbows,
Oscar, you are kind
of a double minority.

359
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:15,390
Gay.

360
00:16:15,474 --> 00:16:18,184
So, we at Sabre
could really benefit
from your perspective.

361
00:16:18,268 --> 00:16:20,520
Dwight, we know
Kelly applied.

362
00:16:22,314 --> 00:16:25,233
We're not going to cross her,
no matter how good
the program is.

363
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:26,693
l can protect
you from Kelly.

364
00:16:26,777 --> 00:16:27,777
(SCOFFS)

365
00:16:27,861 --> 00:16:29,529
Will you get out
of here? Seriously.

366
00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:33,533
For hobbies, yoga,
belly dancing,

367
00:16:33,826 --> 00:16:36,369
snake-charming,
beds of nails,
l like lying. . .

368
00:16:36,453 --> 00:16:40,957
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
This is Hidetosha Hacigawa.

369
00:16:41,041 --> 00:16:43,751
He would like to apply
for the Sabre Minority
Executive Training Program,

370
00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:45,044
Print ln All
Colors initiative.

371
00:16:45,129 --> 00:16:46,462
Dwight, what
are you doing?

372
00:16:46,547 --> 00:16:50,133
Helping heal America
in a dramatic fashion
in the eleventh hour.

373
00:16:50,217 --> 00:16:52,135
God, l hate you so much.

374
00:16:52,219 --> 00:16:53,970
Caucasians.
Am l right?

375
00:16:55,347 --> 00:16:56,514
Have a seat.
l'll translate.

376
00:16:56,598 --> 00:16:58,141
Why? l don't
need translator. . .

377
00:16:58,225 --> 00:17:00,810
You don't know
what you need, just. . .

378
00:17:00,894 --> 00:17:03,521
Why don't you tell me
a little about yourself, Hide.

379
00:17:03,605 --> 00:17:05,273
(SPEAKlNG ENGLlSH)

380
00:17:10,779 --> 00:17:12,780
(SlGHlNG)

381
00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:26,878
Hey, Michael,
how you doing?

382
00:17:26,962 --> 00:17:29,172
l don't know.
l don't know.

383
00:17:29,631 --> 00:17:31,174
Can't really trust
my feelings anymore.

384
00:17:31,258 --> 00:17:34,886
You know what, Michael?
For what it's worth,
l was wrong, too.

385
00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:36,554
l thought she was
interested in you.

386
00:17:36,638 --> 00:17:39,724
She suckered you, too?
Was it the cleavage?

387
00:17:39,808 --> 00:17:41,642
Yeah, and the
shoulder cutouts.
Yep.

388
00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:44,312
Michael, you know,
it's easy to get fooled.

389
00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:48,649
Bob's warehouse guys
flirt with me all the time.
lt's mostly harmless.

390
00:17:49,151 --> 00:17:50,860
Usually l don't
let it go too far.

391
00:17:50,944 --> 00:17:54,072
You know, when
l tore my scrote,
l was. . .

392
00:17:55,115 --> 00:17:59,243
l was seeing this really
hot urologist about it
and thought she was into me,

393
00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:03,581
but now l think she
was just doing a bunch
of stuff to bill my HMO.

394
00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:06,084
You know,
she's touching
around down there.

395
00:18:06,168 --> 00:18:07,794
lt's easy to
get confused.

396
00:18:07,878 --> 00:18:09,378
Michael, l think
Donna left this here.

397
00:18:09,463 --> 00:18:12,548
Should l put it in
the lost and found for 1 4 days
and then l can take it home?

398
00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:13,674
God.

399
00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:17,053
She left this here? Okay.

400
00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:21,349
Maybe she wants me
to return this
to her at her work.

401
00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:22,600
What? No.
No.

402
00:18:22,684 --> 00:18:23,684
KEVlN: No.

403
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:25,186
Yeah. This could
be a signal.

404
00:18:25,521 --> 00:18:27,355
People don't just
take barrettes off.

405
00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:29,690
lt's not a signal.
lt's just a coincidence.

406
00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:30,942
No, it's not even
a coincidence.

407
00:18:31,026 --> 00:18:32,276
lt's just something
that happened.

408
00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:33,486
Michael.
Well. . .

409
00:18:33,570 --> 00:18:38,032
She doesn't want you
to return the barrette.
She's not interested in you.

410
00:18:39,201 --> 00:18:41,202
l know. l know. l know.
l'm sorry.

411
00:18:41,286 --> 00:18:44,747
l know. You're right.
Thank you.
Thanks, everybody.

412
00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:46,958
(CLEARlNG THROAT)

413
00:18:47,042 --> 00:18:48,042
No.

414
00:18:48,752 --> 00:18:50,002
Michael !

415
00:18:50,546 --> 00:18:51,629
(SlGHlNG)

416
00:18:58,929 --> 00:19:00,179
Michael !

417
00:19:01,348 --> 00:19:04,559
Oh, you're still here.
l have your baguette.

418
00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:09,021
Everyone, it is my
pleasure to announce

419
00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:12,316
our newest member
of the Sabre Minority
Executive Training Program,

420
00:19:12,401 --> 00:19:14,443
Kelly Rajanigandha Kapoor.

421
00:19:17,698 --> 00:19:19,824
They're going to be
pretty pleased
in Tallahassee

422
00:19:19,908 --> 00:19:22,326
that l snagged
an lndian for the program.

423
00:19:22,411 --> 00:19:24,537
She'll be the first.
The program's mostly black.

424
00:19:24,621 --> 00:19:26,497
lt's almost too black.

425
00:19:27,749 --> 00:19:29,750
That didn't sound right.

426
00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:32,837
And the best part is,
is that l get a business
stipend

427
00:19:32,921 --> 00:19:34,839
to buy all new clothes.
KEVlN: Awesome.

428
00:19:34,923 --> 00:19:36,507
So you can totally buy
any of my old clothes

429
00:19:36,592 --> 00:19:37,633
that l'm not gonna
need anymore.

430
00:19:37,718 --> 00:19:38,801
Oh, my God,
thank you so much.

431
00:19:38,886 --> 00:19:41,888
l love that denim
jumpsuit you have.
How much?

432
00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:45,808
Actually, l was thinking about
clothes that l was just going
to give to Goodwill anyway.

433
00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:47,602
Great.
Hey, kiddo.

434
00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:51,898
Congratulations are in order.
You deserve it.

435
00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:57,278
Thank you, Dwight.
Oh.

436
00:19:57,738 --> 00:19:59,614
l'll never forget everything
that you've done for me.

437
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:01,407
Gosh. (LAUGHS)

438
00:20:01,491 --> 00:20:02,950
Because l never
forget anything.

439
00:20:05,621 --> 00:20:09,874
Just once l would like
to be a puppet master
and have nothing go wrong.

440
00:20:09,958 --> 00:20:11,626
ls that too much to ask?

441
00:20:11,835 --> 00:20:16,214
You know what? Everybody
told me that you weren't
interested. Everybody.

442
00:20:16,298 --> 00:20:18,341
And l didn't believe them.

443
00:20:19,343 --> 00:20:21,135
And they were right.

444
00:20:22,429 --> 00:20:24,972
So, here's your barrette.

445
00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:28,935
No, you were right.

446
00:20:29,978 --> 00:20:31,896
Who?
You were right.

447
00:20:32,564 --> 00:20:34,148
About what?

448
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:35,483
You were right.

449
00:20:42,199 --> 00:20:44,242
l'm sorry.
No. No. No.

450
00:20:44,326 --> 00:20:45,785
l'm. . .
Nope.

451
00:20:52,584 --> 00:20:53,584
What happened?

452
00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:55,461
Kelly got into
the minority
training program.

453
00:20:55,545 --> 00:20:59,840
Really? Oh, that's great.
That's such good news.
l did it.

454
00:21:01,343 --> 00:21:02,677
l kissed. We kissed.

455
00:21:02,761 --> 00:21:03,803
Oh, Michael. . .

456
00:21:03,887 --> 00:21:06,264
No, l'm serious.
The. . . This happened.

457
00:21:07,057 --> 00:21:11,227
l went down to
the parking lot and l was. . .
l returned her barrette.

458
00:21:15,357 --> 00:21:16,482
We. . .

459
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,568
We did. Okay.
We did. We did.

460
00:21:20,362 --> 00:21:21,862
You know what?
lt doesn't matter,

461
00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:25,574
because l know what happened,
and that is all that counts.

462
00:21:27,369 --> 00:21:28,786
l did do it!