1
00:00:09,259 --> 00:00:11,344
What's this?

2
00:00:13,138 --> 00:00:14,847
Looks like a red wire.

3
00:00:15,057 --> 00:00:16,057
Well...

4
00:00:17,643 --> 00:00:19,268
It wasn't here before.

5
00:00:19,770 --> 00:00:22,814
It's a computer, Dwight.
I mean, computers have wires.

6
00:00:22,898 --> 00:00:24,440
Yours doesn't.

7
00:00:24,900 --> 00:00:26,359
Doesn't it?

8
00:00:26,443 --> 00:00:27,694
No.

9
00:00:29,113 --> 00:00:31,447
It's going in
a different direction
than the other wires.

10
00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:35,076
Dwight, I'm really busy.
I can't talk about this
anymore.

11
00:00:50,300 --> 00:00:53,803
Dwight,
get out of here.
Just shut up, Phyllis.

12
00:00:59,977 --> 00:01:01,477
What are you doing?

13
00:01:08,861 --> 00:01:13,197
I got 500 feet of
red wire at a flea market
out by Dunmore High School.

14
00:01:13,699 --> 00:01:15,742
Twenty bucks for
the whole spool.

15
00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:17,577
Crazy. What a deal.

16
00:01:22,541 --> 00:01:25,668
Oh! He'll be fine.
I made it up there.

17
00:01:58,410 --> 00:02:00,369
What you talking 'bout, Wallace?

18
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:01,954
Hi, Michael.
How are you?
Hi.

19
00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:03,080
I'm well. How are you?

20
00:02:03,165 --> 00:02:04,290
Very good.

21
00:02:04,374 --> 00:02:06,501
So, listen, as you know,

22
00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:08,711
we haven't yet filled
the Regional Supervisor job.

23
00:02:08,837 --> 00:02:10,713
Oh, have you not?
Correct.

24
00:02:10,798 --> 00:02:14,008
And I was wondering
if I could get you to do
some of the fieldwork

25
00:02:14,092 --> 00:02:16,719
that would normally go
to the supervisor.

26
00:02:16,804 --> 00:02:19,972
Okay. There's an area
from Carbondale
to Marshbrook...

27
00:02:20,098 --> 00:02:21,766
Yeah.
...where we've never
done any business.

28
00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:24,268
There's a small company
there, Prince Paper.

29
00:02:24,353 --> 00:02:25,520
I can't get a report on it

30
00:02:25,604 --> 00:02:27,647
because it's not
a public company,

31
00:02:27,731 --> 00:02:29,941
but we've been
talking about going
after their market,

32
00:02:30,025 --> 00:02:31,984
so I was hoping
you could do some
fact-finding for me.

33
00:02:32,069 --> 00:02:33,152
Okay.

34
00:02:33,237 --> 00:02:35,196
I'll fax over some
of the things we're
looking for, okay?

35
00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:37,949
Fax? Why don't you just
send it over on a dinosaur?

36
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:40,701
This is important, Michael.

37
00:02:40,786 --> 00:02:42,995
Oh! Well, then
e-mail it, David.

38
00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:46,165
You've got no taste,
Stanley Hudson.

39
00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:47,667
Oh, I do.

40
00:02:47,751 --> 00:02:48,918
What are you guys talking about?

41
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,795
Some actress, whether she's hot.

42
00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:52,672
Who's the gal in question?

43
00:02:52,756 --> 00:02:54,006
Hilary Swank.

44
00:02:54,091 --> 00:02:56,467
Ah! Hilary Swank.

45
00:02:58,262 --> 00:02:59,262
Not at all.

46
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:00,721
She's got mean eyes.

47
00:03:00,806 --> 00:03:02,181
Have you seen her
with her bangs?

48
00:03:02,266 --> 00:03:03,683
She looks like a monster.

49
00:03:03,767 --> 00:03:06,352
Guys, she is
a beautiful movie star,

50
00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:08,437
so maybe we should
just go to work.

51
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:10,648
She is an amazing actress.

52
00:03:10,732 --> 00:03:12,692
That's not the question.
She's not hot.

53
00:03:12,776 --> 00:03:14,527
- Yeah. Thank you, Phyllis.
- Okay, okay, okay.

54
00:03:14,611 --> 00:03:16,195
Why don't we just
put this to a vote,

55
00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:17,613
and then we'll be done with it?

56
00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,407
I'm not voting.
No one cares.

57
00:03:19,491 --> 00:03:22,618
Who thinks that
Hilary Swank is hot?
Raise your hand.

58
00:03:24,663 --> 00:03:28,165
Okay, and who thinks that
Hilary Swank is not hot?
Raise your hand.

59
00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:33,337
Five. Five to five.

60
00:03:33,422 --> 00:03:34,964
Thank you,
accounting department.

61
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:36,632
So, what do we do now?

62
00:03:36,842 --> 00:03:39,218
What if the owner
of Prince Family Paper
has a beautiful daughter,

63
00:03:39,303 --> 00:03:41,345
and we have to
seduce her in order
to get their secrets?

64
00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:42,471
I will seduce her.

65
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:43,848
No, I want to seduce her.
I'll seduce her.

66
00:03:43,974 --> 00:03:46,142
Let me seduce her.
Michael, please.
No, no, no. I got it.

67
00:03:47,978 --> 00:03:49,103
You'll fall in love with her.

68
00:03:49,187 --> 00:03:50,897
Yeah? So what if I did?

69
00:03:50,981 --> 00:03:53,357
That would take
precedence, and I would
expect your support.

70
00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:56,485
Okay, so let's go over
the plan again.

71
00:03:56,612 --> 00:03:58,529
All right. I am
a local business owner.
Mmm-hmm.

72
00:03:58,614 --> 00:03:59,572
I need to buy paper.
Yep.

73
00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:01,699
I find out everything
about their prices
and policies.

74
00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,701
Your fictitious name?
Michael Scarn.

75
00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:06,662
Good. I am
a paper salesman
looking for a new job.

76
00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:08,873
I find out everything
about their expenses
and salaries.

77
00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:10,458
Okay.
Then we meet
at the Denny's,

78
00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:13,085
and we compare notes.
No. No. I never
said Denny's. IHOP.

79
00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:14,795
No. I said Denny's.
IHOP. We're going to IHOP.

80
00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:16,964
You know how
I feel about IHOP.
Don't start.

81
00:04:17,090 --> 00:04:18,174
Don't...
You know what?
Socialist.

82
00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:20,468
I don't want to get
into this debate again.
Okay.

83
00:04:20,552 --> 00:04:21,552
I enjoy IHOP.

84
00:04:21,637 --> 00:04:22,637
I'll have a cup of coffee.

85
00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:24,972
You will have pancakes,
and you'll like it.

86
00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:35,441
The store next to
them is for lease.

87
00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:36,692
So what?

88
00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:38,527
It means they're not expanding.

89
00:04:38,654 --> 00:04:40,363
Maybe they're
shrinking.
No.

90
00:04:40,489 --> 00:04:42,740
They could be shrinking.
No, because the
sign is centered

91
00:04:42,824 --> 00:04:45,576
perfectly above their store.
No sign of the sign
being moved.

92
00:04:45,661 --> 00:04:46,744
Ah-ha!

93
00:04:46,828 --> 00:04:47,954
Yep.

94
00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:52,833
It's lunch-time,
but no sign of anyone
coming in or out,

95
00:04:53,043 --> 00:04:55,378
which means they're not
taking new customers
out to lunch,

96
00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:56,796
which means they're not
acquiring new business,

97
00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:58,339
so once again, no growth.

98
00:04:58,423 --> 00:05:01,425
Yeah.
There are clouds,
clouds in the sky.

99
00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:04,095
Means it's going to rain.
Bad for business.

100
00:05:04,179 --> 00:05:06,931
It would if
they were altocumulus
and not cirrostratus.

101
00:05:07,015 --> 00:05:08,307
Why do... Okay.

102
00:05:08,392 --> 00:05:09,475
Michael.
Whatever.

103
00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:11,644
Get your clouds right.
Shut up.

104
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:14,355
Okay, so you go in now.
Mmm-hmm.

105
00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:15,982
I'm gonna go in,
in exactly 10 minutes.

106
00:05:16,066 --> 00:05:18,818
We have never met each other.
We are complete strangers.

107
00:05:18,944 --> 00:05:20,236
Right.
Also, we're going
to need a signal

108
00:05:20,362 --> 00:05:22,446
to bolt out of there,
in case there is danger.
Fine.

109
00:05:22,531 --> 00:05:25,408
And that signal is
lick your lips.
Try it.

110
00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:28,244
No, no, no, like this.

111
00:05:34,918 --> 00:05:36,002
Good.

112
00:05:37,004 --> 00:05:38,045
Ready to do this?
Yeah.

113
00:05:38,130 --> 00:05:40,506
All right, here come the sharks.

114
00:06:00,277 --> 00:06:03,029
In nature,
there is something
called the food chain.

115
00:06:03,113 --> 00:06:06,198
It is where the shark
eats the little shark,

116
00:06:06,283 --> 00:06:08,701
and the little shark eats
the littler shark,

117
00:06:08,785 --> 00:06:10,286
and so on and so on and so on,

118
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:13,330
until you get down to
the single-cell shark.

119
00:06:13,415 --> 00:06:16,876
So, now replace sharks
with paper companies,

120
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:18,961
and that is all
you need to know
about business.

121
00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,466
Hello?
Hello.

122
00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:24,967
Hello.
Hi.

123
00:06:25,302 --> 00:06:27,636
Hi.
How can I help you?

124
00:06:27,763 --> 00:06:29,555
My name is Michael Scarn.

125
00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:31,390
I am a local business owner,

126
00:06:31,475 --> 00:06:34,101
and I would like
to find out about
your company.

127
00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:36,937
Please come in.
Thank you.

128
00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,401
What kind of business
are you in?

129
00:06:42,486 --> 00:06:43,736
We're a law firm.

130
00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:47,490
I assume your
primary paper needs are
stationery, general office.

131
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:50,159
You know,
I'll be honest with
you about something.

132
00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:54,747
Where I used to live,
our paper supplier had
a lot of big clients,

133
00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:57,249
and I just didn't
feel like a priority.

134
00:06:57,334 --> 00:07:02,338
So I guess my question
to you would be,

135
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,673
how many clients do you have?

136
00:07:05,467 --> 00:07:06,467
About 80.

137
00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:08,427
Really? That many?

138
00:07:08,512 --> 00:07:10,429
This doesn't seem like
a very big operation.

139
00:07:10,514 --> 00:07:13,766
Well, it's just me,
my wife and my son.

140
00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:17,269
Ah! So, when did
you set up shop?

141
00:07:17,354 --> 00:07:19,939
I opened this place
after I came back
from Vietnam.

142
00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:22,108
Ooh, Vietnam.
I hear it's lovely.

143
00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:24,860
Mmm.

144
00:07:25,028 --> 00:07:27,696
Each side will have
three minutes to prepare
opening arguments.

145
00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:30,616
Topic. Hilary Swank
is attractive.

146
00:07:30,700 --> 00:07:31,784
Hot.
Hot.

147
00:07:31,868 --> 00:07:33,035
The debate is whether she's hot.

148
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:34,286
What difference does it make?

149
00:07:34,371 --> 00:07:36,956
Attractive, hot, beautiful.
We're talking about
the same thing here.

150
00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:40,584
Huge difference.
A painting can be
beautiful,

151
00:07:40,669 --> 00:07:42,128
but I don't want
to bang a painting.

152
00:07:42,212 --> 00:07:43,879
Okay. TMI.

153
00:07:44,256 --> 00:07:47,716
So, even specialty paper,
say 94 brightness,
double-bonded,

154
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:50,636
you would put that on
the same truck as your
conventional stock?

155
00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:53,389
You sure know
a lot about paper
for a lawyer.

156
00:07:53,557 --> 00:07:57,852
Oh! Well, that is
because I am a genius.

157
00:07:57,936 --> 00:07:59,645
Oh, really?
Yes.

158
00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:04,358
Well, about some things,
and other things I'm just...
I'm very stupid.

159
00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:07,194
Like, watch this.
Is this the cup?

160
00:08:08,405 --> 00:08:11,157
Is this the cup?
Is this what
I drink out of?

161
00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:15,619
Laughter is my job.

162
00:08:16,037 --> 00:08:18,831
Tears are my game.
Law is my profession.

163
00:08:19,624 --> 00:08:21,500
- Well...
- Hello.

164
00:08:21,585 --> 00:08:23,002
I'd like to apply for a job.

165
00:08:23,086 --> 00:08:24,170
Hi.

166
00:08:24,254 --> 00:08:27,214
I'm afraid we're
not hiring right now.

167
00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:29,425
Why don't you just
get rid of this guy?

168
00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:31,927
That's my son.

169
00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:34,680
I'm your son now.
You can visit him
on holidays.

170
00:08:34,764 --> 00:08:35,973
Dwight Schrute.

171
00:08:36,099 --> 00:08:39,185
I'm a paper salesman at
a second-tier paper company
called Dunder Mifflin.

172
00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:42,104
I'm the top salesman there,
and I'm looking for
a new challenge.

173
00:08:42,606 --> 00:08:44,607
I would say you guys have, what,

174
00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:46,567
40 high-volume clients?

175
00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:47,860
Try 80.

176
00:08:48,111 --> 00:08:49,904
Eighty, that's nothing.

177
00:08:49,988 --> 00:08:52,156
I've got 90 clients myself.

178
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:55,492
Better look out.
Someone might run you
out of business.

179
00:08:55,577 --> 00:08:56,952
Well, I sure hope not.

180
00:08:58,205 --> 00:08:59,205
Me, too.

181
00:08:59,497 --> 00:09:04,210
I think all of us have
a tendency to view celebrities
as sort of mythical figures.

182
00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:06,629
You know,
we don't really
see them as real,

183
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,839
so, therefore,
we don't judge them
as real people.

184
00:09:08,924 --> 00:09:12,009
Are you serious?
Jim, just show us
a picture.

185
00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:13,761
- Kevin, come on.
- Yeah, shut up, Kevin.

186
00:09:13,845 --> 00:09:16,138
No, but he's making
all these fancy...

187
00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:18,682
It's a gut thing.

188
00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:20,684
That's fair.
You know what, Kev?
Do me a favor.

189
00:09:20,769 --> 00:09:22,311
Why don't you close your eyes?

190
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:26,857
Okay.

191
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:30,819
Now, imagine that
Hilary Swank comes into
this office for real.

192
00:09:31,655 --> 00:09:34,448
She walks over to you
and she says,

193
00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:38,118
"Kevin Malone,
I just read your
online profile,

194
00:09:38,954 --> 00:09:42,581
"and there's nothing I'd
rather do than make out
with you right now."

195
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:47,211
Now, you tell me something,
is she hot?

196
00:09:56,388 --> 00:09:58,931
Does that end the debate
or is there...
Oh!

197
00:09:59,015 --> 00:10:00,224
Hey, Kev, what are you doing?

198
00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:04,895
Nope. It's, "Is she hot?"
not, "Would you do her?"

199
00:10:04,980 --> 00:10:06,146
Respect the game.

200
00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:08,857
Oh, my God.
Yeah.

201
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:09,942
This close.

202
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:12,319
So why are you considering
leaving Dunder Mifflin?

203
00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:15,114
My boss.
Oh, yeah? Do tell.

204
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:18,742
His insensitivity could
border on the cruel.

205
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:23,372
This is a man
who does not listen to
the needs of his underlings.

206
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:24,498
Hey!
He's way...

207
00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:26,292
Hey, how's the interview going?

208
00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:28,460
It's going very well.
Don't blow it.

209
00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:31,672
Hey, Linda, can I get
a picture of you?

210
00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:34,133
You want a picture of me?
I would.

211
00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:36,302
Could you just
stand right over here?

212
00:10:36,386 --> 00:10:39,972
That would be great.
Just something to
remember the trip by.

213
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:43,475
Just a little to your left.

214
00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:45,185
There you go. Good.

215
00:10:45,937 --> 00:10:47,146
Perfect.

216
00:10:47,230 --> 00:10:48,647
Can I have a copy of that?

217
00:10:48,732 --> 00:10:49,898
Um...

218
00:10:50,525 --> 00:10:52,860
Grandma, I can't do this.

219
00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:56,322
What's going on?
A little homework
over here?

220
00:10:56,406 --> 00:10:58,240
Yeah.
Let's see if I can help.

221
00:10:58,325 --> 00:10:59,408
Right there.

222
00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:01,910
Oh! Math.
That's not so hard.

223
00:11:02,329 --> 00:11:04,288
Okay. There are
four of these.
All right.

224
00:11:04,372 --> 00:11:06,332
Ignore the parentheses, right?

225
00:11:06,416 --> 00:11:09,710
Right.
Why is this little 2
so small?

226
00:11:09,919 --> 00:11:13,922
It's weird.
You just don't...
Just go by the "X."

227
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:20,888
The "X" means times,
so that means
four times "X," 2.

228
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:22,890
What is double 4?

229
00:11:23,767 --> 00:11:25,934
Eight.
Right. Excellent.

230
00:11:29,939 --> 00:11:31,523
Don't put that.

231
00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:37,196
Ladies and gentlemen,
even though the penis
was fake,

232
00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:40,074
I kept expecting
a second plot twist

233
00:11:40,158 --> 00:11:44,286
where we found out
that Hilary Swank
actually was a boy.

234
00:11:44,579 --> 00:11:46,205
Kevin.
Okay.

235
00:11:46,289 --> 00:11:49,333
I wasn't going to dignify
this discussion by getting
involved,

236
00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:51,377
and I don't even
get the discussion.

237
00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:53,128
Hot is a temperature, people.

238
00:11:54,089 --> 00:11:56,840
But Kevin
deserves to lose
for what he said.

239
00:11:56,925 --> 00:12:00,803
So, yes, she's hot.
She's hot as heck.

240
00:12:01,096 --> 00:12:02,763
She's a female Boris Becker.

241
00:12:05,141 --> 00:12:06,141
All right.

242
00:12:06,684 --> 00:12:08,977
Well, thank you very much
for all of your help.

243
00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:10,938
It's going to be
an incredibly
hard decision.

244
00:12:11,147 --> 00:12:13,982
Wait. Let me get
something for you here.

245
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:18,445
Here's some references.
Our top clients.

246
00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:23,075
You call any of them.
I trust you'll hear
some good things.

247
00:12:24,536 --> 00:12:27,746
Okay. Okay. Okay.

248
00:12:29,290 --> 00:12:30,374
All right, thank you.

249
00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:31,542
You're welcome.

250
00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:36,588
Excuse me, sir.
Mmm-hmm?

251
00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:38,173
I took the bus here
and was wondering

252
00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:40,342
if I could
catch a ride home
with you in your car.

253
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,469
Of course.
Thank you very much.

254
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:43,971
Thanks for your time.
Thank you very much.

255
00:12:44,013 --> 00:12:46,056
Thank you for your time.
I cannot wait to
contact your clients.

256
00:12:46,141 --> 00:12:47,933
I'll look forward
to getting your calls.

257
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:50,018
All right.
Bye now. So long.

258
00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:53,522
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

259
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:58,485
We struck the mother lode.

260
00:12:58,570 --> 00:13:00,279
Come on!
Wallace is gonna freak.

261
00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:02,030
He is going to
absolutely freak.
All their top clients.

262
00:13:02,115 --> 00:13:03,532
I can't believe it.
Someone's looking out
the window.

263
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:06,201
Go, go, go.
Go, peel out! Go!

264
00:13:06,870 --> 00:13:08,036
Shoot.
What the...

265
00:13:08,163 --> 00:13:10,414
Okay, I'll just...
I know.
You drove over the...

266
00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:12,875
I know. I know. Oh!
Go back.

267
00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:15,544
God, what was that?
That's not good.

268
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:22,718
Oh, come on.
Yes!

269
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:25,804
No, no, no.
She's hot, okay?

270
00:13:25,889 --> 00:13:29,016
Because if you are saying
that Hilary Swank isn't hot,

271
00:13:29,100 --> 00:13:30,726
then you're saying I'm not hot,

272
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:33,937
because obviously
I'm not as hot
as Hilary Swank!

273
00:13:35,732 --> 00:13:37,274
- Oh.
- Darn it.

274
00:13:37,901 --> 00:13:40,777
Oh, come on.
Oh, man.

275
00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:42,613
- My car.
- Are you all right?

276
00:13:42,697 --> 00:13:43,989
Not good.
Is everyone okay?

277
00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:45,824
- Yeah.
- It sounded bad.

278
00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:47,659
No, no, no. We're fine.
We're fine.
Yeah.

279
00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:49,036
You folks have done
enough already.
You don't...

280
00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:50,787
You've done more than
you could possibly know.

281
00:13:50,872 --> 00:13:52,748
Dwight, just...
Okay.

282
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:54,833
You know,
we're just gonna call
a tow truck, so...

283
00:13:54,918 --> 00:13:58,003
No, a tow truck is gonna
charge you 100 bucks
just to take you a mile.

284
00:13:58,087 --> 00:13:59,838
Let me take a look.
No. No.

285
00:13:59,923 --> 00:14:01,965
You know,
really not necessary.
He drove over the divider,

286
00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:03,091
- and then backed over it.
- Dwight.

287
00:14:03,176 --> 00:14:04,510
It caught the bumper.
I'll be right back.

288
00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:06,011
I'm just gonna grab my toolbox.

289
00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:07,387
Don't...

290
00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:14,603
Ladies, are we prepared to
let the Kevins of the world
decide anything for us?

291
00:14:14,979 --> 00:14:18,857
Anything at all?
We don't even give him
full Internet access.

292
00:14:21,027 --> 00:14:22,069
Wait, what?

293
00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:25,656
See that? The obvious
symmetry of the face.

294
00:14:26,491 --> 00:14:31,495
This is a natural appeal
of the scientific standard
of koinophilia,

295
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:35,499
features that are
a composite average
of many features.

296
00:14:35,959 --> 00:14:39,545
Yes, she's attractive,
but she's not hot.

297
00:14:41,839 --> 00:14:43,715
How much longer
is this gonna take?
Put that over there.

298
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:45,217
You know,
let me give you
some money for this.

299
00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:46,468
No. I sit all day.

300
00:14:46,511 --> 00:14:48,971
It's nice working
with my hands.
Well, I...

301
00:14:50,265 --> 00:14:54,893
Oh! Coffee.
That's too much nice.

302
00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:56,019
Maybe not enough oil.

303
00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:57,854
Thank you.
You're welcome.

304
00:14:58,147 --> 00:15:00,649
Ah. Disgusting.
What is this? Instant?

305
00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:02,568
Well, that ought to do it.
Okay.

306
00:15:02,652 --> 00:15:04,528
It's all better.
Thank you.

307
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:06,280
Gosh, well, so long.

308
00:15:06,531 --> 00:15:07,823
Bye-bye.
That looks great.

309
00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:09,741
- Drive safe.
- Bye.

310
00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:12,578
Look forward to hearing
from you about that
job application.

311
00:15:12,662 --> 00:15:14,496
Bye.
Okay.

312
00:15:15,123 --> 00:15:17,124
Goodbye, Prince family.

313
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:19,876
Should be called
the "Sucker" family.

314
00:15:19,961 --> 00:15:21,336
"Here you go, shark.

315
00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:25,215
"Let me fix your fin
for you and sharpen your
teeth while I'm at it."

316
00:15:28,511 --> 00:15:30,512
Bye-bye, suckers.

317
00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:47,946
I'm just saying.
No, it's...

318
00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:50,073
All I'm saying is Kevin's
not necessarily a feminist.

319
00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:52,367
That's all I'm saying.
What are you...

320
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:02,127
Dwight, what will
happen to that family

321
00:16:02,211 --> 00:16:04,588
if I call Wallace
and give him
this information?

322
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:08,925
It's simple.
Wallace would use that
information to destroy them.

323
00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:10,302
Okay.

324
00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:11,928
You know,
our sales are fine.
Well.

325
00:16:12,013 --> 00:16:13,805
We're doing fine.
They're doing fine.

326
00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:15,515
Could be better.
Why don't we just live
and let live?

327
00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:17,351
What?
Live and let live.

328
00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:18,560
I'm not familiar
with that expression.

329
00:16:18,645 --> 00:16:19,978
It's a James Bond...

330
00:16:20,063 --> 00:16:21,146
It doesn't make
any sense.
Okay.

331
00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:22,230
Of course I'm alive.

332
00:16:22,357 --> 00:16:25,525
I'm not going
to make this call.
Michael, you have to.

333
00:16:25,610 --> 00:16:26,902
Have you ever seen
a lioness devour
her cub?

334
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,654
Oh, God, not this.
Have you ever seen a baboon

335
00:16:28,738 --> 00:16:30,489
devour its mate?

336
00:16:30,573 --> 00:16:32,074
Have you ever seen
a raccoon devour
a squirrel?

337
00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:34,326
My heart...
My heart says no.

338
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,703
Your heart
is a wonderful
thing, Michael.

339
00:16:36,788 --> 00:16:38,413
But it makes some
terrible decisions.

340
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:39,498
That's true.

341
00:16:39,582 --> 00:16:41,333
Yes. Gosh.
That's true.

342
00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:44,503
It has gone down
the wrong path
many, many times.

343
00:16:44,587 --> 00:16:45,796
Jan, Ryan.

344
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,464
Yeah, save your heart for love.

345
00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:50,717
And use your brain
for business. Right?

346
00:16:51,302 --> 00:16:54,930
If we don't do this
to Prince Paper,
then someone else will.

347
00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:59,059
Or worse yet,
someone else
will do it to us.

348
00:17:01,479 --> 00:17:05,941
I am trying to be
more optimistic in life.

349
00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:08,026
I've got, what,

350
00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:10,529
20, 30 more years left,

351
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:13,615
and my family history says

352
00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:16,493
I have less.

353
00:17:17,453 --> 00:17:20,038
Now, the old Stanley Hudson
would have found

354
00:17:20,123 --> 00:17:23,417
something to complain about
with this actress,

355
00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:26,753
but that's no way to live life.

356
00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:31,007
Look at this healthy, sexy,

357
00:17:31,801 --> 00:17:34,219
pretty, strong, young woman.

358
00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:36,263
Come on, people.

359
00:17:36,347 --> 00:17:39,975
She is hot.

360
00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:42,394
And it was a terrible war.

361
00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:45,147
Oh! So many died.

362
00:17:45,523 --> 00:17:46,982
Far too many died,

363
00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:50,736
but if Frodo hadn't
destroyed the ring,

364
00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:53,739
then goodness itself
might have died.

365
00:17:56,284 --> 00:17:57,534
You're right.
Yeah.

366
00:17:58,953 --> 00:18:01,747
You are right.
I will call Wallace,

367
00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:04,624
and I will give him
the customer list.

368
00:18:06,252 --> 00:18:08,086
And I will give him
all of my info.

369
00:18:08,171 --> 00:18:10,172
You are doing the
right thing, Michael.

370
00:18:10,798 --> 00:18:13,425
Good. So...

371
00:18:14,844 --> 00:18:15,886
Where are you going?

372
00:18:15,970 --> 00:18:17,929
Just something
I have to do first.

373
00:18:18,014 --> 00:18:19,431
Where are you taking
the client list?

374
00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:22,434
Someplace safe,
where it can't
hurt anyone.

375
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:23,560
Michael!

376
00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:27,522
Michael! No!

377
00:18:27,690 --> 00:18:29,107
I will get it.

378
00:18:29,192 --> 00:18:30,567
Michael, don't do this!

379
00:18:30,651 --> 00:18:31,860
Don't do it!

380
00:18:32,195 --> 00:18:35,655
Michael!

381
00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:39,117
Oh, shoot! My keys.
Come on, stop. Freeze.

382
00:18:39,202 --> 00:18:41,036
Stop! Give me the list!

383
00:18:56,677 --> 00:18:57,969
No, no, no. No!

384
00:18:58,054 --> 00:19:00,305
I can't let you do this.
Those people will be ruined!

385
00:19:00,389 --> 00:19:02,390
It's business!
It's not personal!

386
00:19:11,526 --> 00:19:12,818
No!
Give it!

387
00:19:13,444 --> 00:19:14,611
Dwight, give it!

388
00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:17,864
You can't do this
to those people!

389
00:19:18,074 --> 00:19:20,158
It's over, Michael.
It's over.

390
00:19:29,919 --> 00:19:31,086
I'm not a shark.

391
00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:35,006
No!

392
00:19:35,258 --> 00:19:36,967
Okay, time for the final vote.

393
00:19:37,426 --> 00:19:41,888
All those in favor
of the resolution,
"Hilary Swank is hot."

394
00:19:44,100 --> 00:19:45,100
Okay.

395
00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:48,770
And all those opposed.

396
00:19:51,274 --> 00:19:53,191
This is ridiculous.
That's the thing
about debating.

397
00:19:53,276 --> 00:19:55,902
People just get
entrenched in the view
they had in the first place.

398
00:19:55,987 --> 00:19:58,864
I could tell
when I was talking
you were not listening.

399
00:19:58,948 --> 00:20:00,699
This is great stuff, Michael.

400
00:20:00,992 --> 00:20:03,326
You are a titan
of industry, pal.

401
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:05,078
Yeah. Thank you.
Good work.

402
00:20:05,162 --> 00:20:06,997
Look, I'll be in touch.
Thanks, buddy.

403
00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:08,123
Okay. Bye-bye.

404
00:20:13,129 --> 00:20:15,297
Well, guess whose stock
just went up, golden boy?

405
00:20:18,384 --> 00:20:21,136
I guess
this is what they call
a bittersweet moment.

406
00:20:23,431 --> 00:20:29,561
It is bitter because
I slightly destroyed
a wonderful little family.

407
00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:33,148
But sweet because
David Wallace thought
I did a good job.

408
00:20:35,318 --> 00:20:37,485
That's why I hate
bittersweet chocolate.

409
00:20:38,654 --> 00:20:41,072
I don't even...
What's the point of that?

410
00:20:41,657 --> 00:20:44,743
Why not just sweet?
I mean, who are
you helping?

411
00:20:49,832 --> 00:20:51,541
Oh, hey, what is this?

412
00:20:51,626 --> 00:20:52,709
Hilary Swank.

413
00:20:52,793 --> 00:20:54,002
Oh, she's hot.

414
00:20:57,840 --> 00:20:59,049
Yeah!

415
00:21:00,009 --> 00:21:01,009
Damn it.