1 00:00:02,961 --> 00:00:04,420 I am on a lecture circuit. 2 00:00:04,505 --> 00:00:06,255 I'm going around to all the branches, 3 00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:09,258 and I am telling them my secret recipe for success. 4 00:00:09,385 --> 00:00:12,095 I have now memorized all of your names. 5 00:00:12,429 --> 00:00:17,558 Shirty, mole, lazy eye, Mexico, baldy. 6 00:00:17,935 --> 00:00:19,644 Hi, Kelly. Screw you. 7 00:00:19,728 --> 00:00:20,770 Excuse me. 8 00:00:20,854 --> 00:00:22,063 Screw you, too. 9 00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:23,648 You forgot her birthday. 10 00:00:23,732 --> 00:00:25,191 And I turn it on and I say, 11 00:00:25,275 --> 00:00:28,528 "Prepare yourself for the Utica Chain Store Massacre." 12 00:00:28,946 --> 00:00:30,571 How's Jim? We're engaged. 13 00:00:30,656 --> 00:00:31,864 Oh, my God. I'm so happy for you. 14 00:00:31,949 --> 00:00:33,408 Wow. Thank you. 15 00:00:33,492 --> 00:00:39,414 "Kelly Kapoor spent April 1995 to December 1996 at Berks County Youth Center." 16 00:00:40,499 --> 00:00:41,541 Juvie. 17 00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:43,626 You remember Holly? 18 00:00:43,711 --> 00:00:45,795 She used to work for HR. 19 00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:47,296 She was the love of my life. 20 00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:50,383 She just left and I never got closure. 21 00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:53,970 And I feel like I need to go to Nashua and get closure. 22 00:00:54,638 --> 00:00:56,806 Okay. Let's go. 23 00:01:21,665 --> 00:01:22,665 Two. 24 00:01:22,750 --> 00:01:24,000 I didn't eat lunch. 25 00:01:25,002 --> 00:01:27,086 I didn't eat all my lunch. 26 00:01:29,256 --> 00:01:30,840 Hello, everyone. 27 00:01:32,384 --> 00:01:35,595 Ice cream. Nice, Kevin. Looks good. 28 00:01:36,305 --> 00:01:38,347 It... Yeah. 29 00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:41,517 Angela, you're more chipper than usual. 30 00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:46,022 I am proud to announce that there is a new addition to the Martin family. 31 00:01:47,065 --> 00:01:50,985 She's hypo-allergenic, she doesn't struggle when you try to dress her, 32 00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:52,820 she's a third-generation show cat. 33 00:01:52,905 --> 00:01:55,114 Her father was in Meet the Parents. 34 00:01:55,199 --> 00:01:57,492 Needless to say, she's very, very expensive. 35 00:01:57,576 --> 00:01:59,118 How much? $7,000. 36 00:01:59,203 --> 00:02:01,954 For a cat? I can get you a kid for that. 37 00:02:02,372 --> 00:02:03,539 Where did you get that kind of money? 38 00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:05,958 I sold Andy's engagement ring on eBay. 39 00:02:06,043 --> 00:02:07,960 Wait, you didn't give it back? 40 00:02:08,045 --> 00:02:10,087 He wouldn't have wanted that. 41 00:02:10,255 --> 00:02:12,298 Her name is Princess Lady. 42 00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:15,843 Seven grand. I've got to see that little bitch. 43 00:02:15,928 --> 00:02:18,095 I have something better than a picture. Come on. 44 00:02:18,597 --> 00:02:20,723 You have your cats on Nanny Cam. 45 00:02:20,808 --> 00:02:24,018 Yeah. I mean, I usually try to take leave when I get a new cat, 46 00:02:24,102 --> 00:02:25,686 but I'm out of vacation days, 47 00:02:25,771 --> 00:02:28,356 and this company still doesn't recognize cat maternity. 48 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:30,691 I mean, somebody has a kid, oh, sure, take off a year. 49 00:02:30,776 --> 00:02:32,985 She's right. I had my second kid just for the vacation. 50 00:02:33,070 --> 00:02:35,404 Right. Anyways, I just want to make sure 51 00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,615 Princess Lady is acclimating well. 52 00:02:38,033 --> 00:02:39,700 She means more to me than anyone. 53 00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:41,494 Any cat, you mean. 54 00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,412 And person. 55 00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:52,380 So, detour. We're now adding Nashua to the lecture circuit, 56 00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:55,758 so Michael can confront Holly and get some closure. 57 00:02:55,926 --> 00:02:58,094 Nashua actually sounded very excited on the phone. 58 00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,972 I don't think they get a lot of visitors. 59 00:03:01,056 --> 00:03:04,141 Because their office is only accessible by cross-country skis. 60 00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:09,272 I've been driving too long. 61 00:03:11,108 --> 00:03:13,025 - What did you do? - Stop yelling at me! 62 00:03:13,110 --> 00:03:15,194 What did you do? I didn't do anything. 63 00:03:15,279 --> 00:03:16,487 What did you learn in there? 64 00:03:16,572 --> 00:03:18,573 I'll bet you learned things, huh? 65 00:03:18,657 --> 00:03:20,575 Like how to fashion a shiv. 66 00:03:20,659 --> 00:03:22,285 Hey, what the hell's going on? 67 00:03:22,369 --> 00:03:25,454 Why don't you tell Jim where you were from ages 14 to 15? 68 00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:26,914 I was kicking it. 69 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:28,374 In juvie. 70 00:03:28,458 --> 00:03:32,295 What? Juvie-nile detention center. 71 00:03:32,838 --> 00:03:34,046 Where they send teenagers. Yep. 72 00:03:34,131 --> 00:03:35,131 For re... Got it. 73 00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:36,465 What did you do, huh? 74 00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,217 Hey, Dwight, sounds like she was 14, 75 00:03:38,302 --> 00:03:39,468 so maybe we want to go a little easy. 76 00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:40,761 If she's old enough to get married, 77 00:03:40,846 --> 00:03:42,680 she's old enough to follow the law. 78 00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:44,348 What did you do? 79 00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:47,977 My boyfriend dumped me, so I stole his boat. 80 00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,938 He told me it was his boat. It was actually his father's. 81 00:03:51,023 --> 00:03:53,149 I just thought it'd be really romantic, 82 00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,568 like Thelma & Louise, but with, like, a boat. 83 00:03:55,652 --> 00:03:58,070 And it was the worst year of my life. 84 00:03:58,155 --> 00:03:59,739 And I can't believe that you guys are 85 00:03:59,823 --> 00:04:01,908 making me talk about this on my birthday. 86 00:04:01,992 --> 00:04:03,743 I thought you said yesterday was your birthday. 87 00:04:03,827 --> 00:04:06,454 Hey, you know what? I got you a cake. 88 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:10,374 You did? I want to see the cake. 89 00:04:12,044 --> 00:04:14,086 And, ta-dah. 90 00:04:15,839 --> 00:04:17,006 I hate it. 91 00:04:17,090 --> 00:04:18,341 How do you hate it? It's a cake. 92 00:04:18,425 --> 00:04:21,302 Well, there's no flowers or toys or... 93 00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:23,095 I mean, there's nothing on it. 94 00:04:23,180 --> 00:04:25,264 Where did you even find a cake like this? 95 00:04:25,349 --> 00:04:26,682 It doesn't even have my name on it. 96 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:28,017 Do you guys know what my name is? 97 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:29,977 My name is Kelly. Right. 98 00:04:30,187 --> 00:04:33,522 I forgot if there was an "E" between the "L" and the "Y." 99 00:04:33,607 --> 00:04:34,815 I still don't know. 100 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:37,568 I don't even know what the theme is! What's the theme? 101 00:04:40,072 --> 00:04:41,989 It's birthday. Frosting. 102 00:04:42,074 --> 00:04:43,866 Those aren't themes. 103 00:04:45,869 --> 00:04:50,873 There's always a theme. 104 00:04:52,042 --> 00:04:53,793 Nice job on the cake, bozo. 105 00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:56,003 Okay, you know what? Next time, I'll let you get the cake 106 00:04:56,088 --> 00:04:58,130 and I get to scream at the birthday girl. 107 00:05:00,717 --> 00:05:03,386 Okay, a little bit more closer to the sign. 108 00:05:04,554 --> 00:05:05,680 Yeah. 109 00:05:10,102 --> 00:05:12,436 Do I look okay? You look good. 110 00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:16,399 Hi. Hi, can I help you? 111 00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:19,443 Yes, you can. I am Michael Scott, 112 00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:20,987 Regional Manager of the Scranton Branch. 113 00:05:21,071 --> 00:05:22,989 Yes, we were expecting you. Have a seat. 114 00:05:23,073 --> 00:05:24,573 Thank you. 115 00:05:25,242 --> 00:05:26,325 Um... 116 00:05:26,410 --> 00:05:29,245 Is Holly Flax anywhere here? 117 00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:33,249 Actually, she's on an HR retreat for the next three days. 118 00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:35,751 She's not here? 119 00:05:36,586 --> 00:05:38,504 But if you need to get in touch with her immediately, 120 00:05:38,588 --> 00:05:40,715 you could talk to A.J. He's a salesman here. 121 00:05:40,799 --> 00:05:41,966 A.J. 122 00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:44,593 Yeah, he's her boyfriend. He's just over there. 123 00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:05,656 She has a boyfriend. 124 00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:07,783 I'm so sorry, Michael. 125 00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:16,625 How could she do this to me, Pam? 126 00:06:20,172 --> 00:06:22,465 She's not doing it to hurt you. 127 00:06:23,884 --> 00:06:26,510 I can't do the presentation, I can't. 128 00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:32,141 Just thinking about seeing him, 129 00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:37,563 and thinking about him getting to hold her 130 00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:41,942 and getting to kiss her is just... Oh, God. 131 00:06:42,027 --> 00:06:44,195 Listen, when Jim was dating Karen, 132 00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:45,905 I didn't want to come to work. 133 00:06:45,989 --> 00:06:47,865 It was awful, I hated it. 134 00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:51,619 I wanted to quit, but... Just, please, come on. 135 00:06:51,703 --> 00:06:53,662 I'm going through something, okay? 136 00:06:57,334 --> 00:06:59,251 You know, when Holly gets back, 137 00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:02,171 everyone will tell her what a great job you did. 138 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,507 And then she'll realize what she's missing. 139 00:07:04,591 --> 00:07:07,968 And then she'll move back to Scranton, and her boyfriend will die. 140 00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:11,180 Yeah, maybe. Maybe. 141 00:07:11,807 --> 00:07:13,516 One step at a time. 142 00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:17,269 You can do this. 143 00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:20,815 I can do this. 144 00:07:23,110 --> 00:07:24,693 It could be snacks or... 145 00:07:24,820 --> 00:07:26,403 But why would we... 146 00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:30,699 Is that what I think it is? 147 00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:32,993 Good God! 148 00:07:34,704 --> 00:07:37,998 That one ugly cat is humping Princess Lady. 149 00:07:38,083 --> 00:07:39,625 - No! - Awesome. 150 00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:42,670 Stop it, Mr. Ash! Bad cat, that is very bad. 151 00:07:42,754 --> 00:07:45,631 You stop it right now. I swear he is fixed. 152 00:07:45,757 --> 00:07:47,758 I know fixed, that ain't fixed. No way. 153 00:07:47,843 --> 00:07:49,385 No, now listen, you can't let what you see 154 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:50,970 here sully your image of them. 155 00:07:51,054 --> 00:07:53,305 They are good, decent cats. 156 00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:55,182 I got to go. I'll be back in an hour. 157 00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:57,101 Oh, stop that! 158 00:07:58,145 --> 00:07:59,687 The other one's watching. 159 00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:02,481 Okay, so all we need is a theme. 160 00:08:02,566 --> 00:08:06,485 And cups, and ice, and punch, and a cake. 161 00:08:06,570 --> 00:08:07,695 Busy. 162 00:08:08,113 --> 00:08:09,947 Hey, what's that show that she's always talking about? 163 00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:11,323 Is this how you are with Pam? 164 00:08:11,408 --> 00:08:13,576 Because she must want to shoot herself in the face. 165 00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:14,827 You know what? I could use a little help. 166 00:08:14,911 --> 00:08:16,829 You know what? I'm a little busy. 167 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:23,878 We have a lot to do, and you are 168 00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:26,046 putting up a very effeminate sign. 169 00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:27,173 Is that what you've been doing? Making a sign? 170 00:08:27,257 --> 00:08:29,258 It's not effeminate. It's festive. 171 00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,010 You've been making that sign 172 00:08:31,094 --> 00:08:33,304 for something that we could just announce to the whole office? 173 00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:35,181 Hey, everybody, the party's now at 3:00! 174 00:08:35,265 --> 00:08:37,433 I know, I just read it on the sign. 175 00:08:42,105 --> 00:08:47,443 Good morning, Viet-Nashua! 176 00:08:49,237 --> 00:08:55,284 Sales. Sales is what brings us together today. 177 00:08:56,119 --> 00:09:01,248 How do we deal with clients who say, 178 00:09:01,333 --> 00:09:04,752 "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn about paper," 179 00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:08,714 and get them to show us the money? 180 00:09:08,798 --> 00:09:12,134 Well, we are going to find out today. 181 00:09:12,302 --> 00:09:14,595 Show of hands, how many of you are salesmen? 182 00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:15,804 Let's see the salesmen. 183 00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:19,058 Oh, okay. Well, I know what the rest of you are thinking. 184 00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:24,605 "Wow, yuck, salesmen are the worst, they are awful. 185 00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:29,777 "They are so arrogant. They think the whole place revolves around them. 186 00:09:29,861 --> 00:09:35,532 "Handsome, good listeners, funny. Mr. Wonderful." 187 00:09:35,617 --> 00:09:38,911 So, okay, you're a salesman, what's your name? 188 00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:39,995 A.J. 189 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:43,374 A.J. What kind of name is A.J.? What, do you race cars? 190 00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:46,210 I'm a salesman, that's why I raised my hand. 191 00:09:46,294 --> 00:09:49,088 Ouch. Okay. Good. 192 00:09:49,172 --> 00:09:51,215 You're funny, very good and funny. 193 00:09:51,299 --> 00:09:55,261 Tell me, A.J., are you dating? Is there somebody you date? 194 00:09:57,514 --> 00:09:59,556 Yeah. Why, you interested? 195 00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:03,227 I have a question about discounts from distributors. 196 00:10:03,311 --> 00:10:04,812 Yep, we will get to you. 197 00:10:04,896 --> 00:10:06,981 Okay, so you're dating somebody. 198 00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:08,732 Um... 199 00:10:09,192 --> 00:10:10,526 Is it serious? 200 00:10:11,778 --> 00:10:13,779 It's pretty serious. Yes. 201 00:10:18,994 --> 00:10:20,202 Does she ever talk about me? 202 00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,537 Oh, God. 203 00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:24,456 Excuse me? 204 00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:25,958 What does this have to do with sales? 205 00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:27,543 It's all connected, shut up. 206 00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:29,253 Does she ever mention Michael Scott? 207 00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:32,464 No. What are you talking about? 208 00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:36,468 Does it feel good? 209 00:10:37,095 --> 00:10:38,387 Does what feel good? 210 00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:41,932 Your life. Oh, wow. 211 00:10:45,228 --> 00:10:47,521 My legs are sort of giving out. 212 00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:49,940 Long drive in the car, so let me... 213 00:10:50,025 --> 00:10:52,026 just continue. 214 00:10:54,738 --> 00:10:58,157 Oh, wow. Okay. 215 00:10:58,241 --> 00:10:59,700 Michael, get off the floor. 216 00:10:59,784 --> 00:11:03,704 Yeah, yeah, I can't do this, Pam. 217 00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:07,833 Just read the cards. No, no, no. 218 00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:09,335 Michael, you have to do it. 219 00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:11,211 No, I'm okay. I'm all right. 220 00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:17,760 Okay. Okay. 221 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,475 That was weird, huh? 222 00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:27,686 It's all part of the presentation. 223 00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:31,648 It was confusing, right? 224 00:11:31,941 --> 00:11:37,780 Because confusing situations happen to us all the time in our jobs. 225 00:11:40,450 --> 00:11:43,744 I'm just trying to bridge the gap between what just happened 226 00:11:43,828 --> 00:11:47,164 and the fact that I'm going to be doing the rest of the presentation. 227 00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:53,212 Sales is like a box of chocolates. 228 00:11:53,296 --> 00:11:56,340 You never know which vendor you're gonna get. 229 00:11:58,301 --> 00:11:59,385 Forrest Gump. 230 00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:06,892 Blazer, freckles, penguin, 231 00:12:06,976 --> 00:12:09,978 K. D. Lang, Holly's boyfriend. 232 00:12:11,106 --> 00:12:15,401 These mnemonic devices help to make a connection, 233 00:12:15,485 --> 00:12:19,238 and then also to help you memorize names. 234 00:12:21,991 --> 00:12:23,700 I have a chainsaw! 235 00:12:31,918 --> 00:12:33,377 Cutting down the competition. 236 00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:37,923 - Where is that bad cat? - You know who you are. 237 00:12:38,007 --> 00:12:40,592 Excuse me, Petals, I'm looking for Mr. Ash. 238 00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:43,011 He's a bad cat. Bad, bad cat. 239 00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:45,514 Do you hear me? Bad. You are bad. 240 00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:47,433 No, you look at me when I talk to you. 241 00:12:47,559 --> 00:12:49,393 Do you hear me, Mr. Ash? Look at me. 242 00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:57,526 This is getting weird. 243 00:12:59,654 --> 00:13:01,530 Is she cleaning the cat with her tongue? 244 00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:33,664 Has this been on the entire time? 245 00:14:33,748 --> 00:14:35,165 I have no idea. 246 00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:39,253 I was looking at pictures of food on my computer. 247 00:14:41,130 --> 00:14:42,923 Well, sorry I'm late. 248 00:14:52,642 --> 00:14:54,309 I want to get that image out of my head. 249 00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:57,729 The psychological issues that go behind licking a cat 250 00:14:57,814 --> 00:15:00,148 are not things I want to go into. 251 00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:02,401 Also, I'm pretty sure she coughed up a hairball. 252 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:07,489 Don't look up. Don't look up. 253 00:15:16,165 --> 00:15:17,874 Want some pie? No. 254 00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:20,210 I went through Holly's things. What? 255 00:15:20,295 --> 00:15:21,753 I stole a sleeve of her sweater. 256 00:15:21,879 --> 00:15:23,380 Oh, Michael. 257 00:15:24,299 --> 00:15:26,258 I also stole something off of her computer. 258 00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:29,595 A document called "Dear Michael." You did what? 259 00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:33,181 I shouldn't have done it. It just... I couldn't help it. 260 00:15:34,851 --> 00:15:37,894 She never sent it to you? No, she didn't. 261 00:15:39,606 --> 00:15:40,606 I'm going to read it. 262 00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:41,773 No. Yes. 263 00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:44,610 No, under no circumstances can you read that letter. 264 00:15:44,694 --> 00:15:47,195 It's a violation of her trust. 265 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:48,530 How? 266 00:15:48,656 --> 00:15:50,157 Because she didn't send it to you. I know, I know. 267 00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:51,908 You're right, you're right. 268 00:15:55,830 --> 00:15:57,414 I could read it. 269 00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:00,876 No, I wouldn't... 270 00:16:02,211 --> 00:16:03,587 Yeah, I could read it. 271 00:16:03,671 --> 00:16:05,047 No, you don't have to do that. 272 00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:07,215 Go get your laptop. Okay. 273 00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:13,680 What? I'm not in love with her. 274 00:16:17,018 --> 00:16:18,602 You have to write my suggestions down, too. 275 00:16:18,686 --> 00:16:22,356 I'm not writing "horse hunt." I don't even know what that means. 276 00:16:22,565 --> 00:16:23,899 It's in the name. 277 00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:33,283 Okay, so far, our ideal party consists of beer, fights to the death, 278 00:16:33,368 --> 00:16:36,453 cupcakes, blood pudding, blood, touch football, 279 00:16:36,537 --> 00:16:39,539 mating, charades and, yes, horse hunting. 280 00:16:39,624 --> 00:16:41,541 You're right. Forget horse hunting. It's stupid. 281 00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:44,336 Look, is there a birthday that you remember that you loved? 282 00:16:44,420 --> 00:16:48,215 Here's one. It was dark, warm, wet. 283 00:16:49,801 --> 00:16:53,762 A sudden burst of light, an intense pressure like I'd never felt before. 284 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:57,474 Father dressed in white pulls me forward, mother bites the cord. 285 00:16:57,558 --> 00:17:00,727 Okay, stop. Forever stop that story. 286 00:17:00,812 --> 00:17:03,855 That's disgusting and it doesn't count. So give me another one. 287 00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:06,149 Schrutes don't celebrate birthdays, idiot. 288 00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:08,485 It started as a Depression-era practicality 289 00:17:08,569 --> 00:17:10,320 and then moved on to an awesome tradition 290 00:17:10,405 --> 00:17:12,364 that I look forward to every year. 291 00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:13,490 What about you? 292 00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:14,991 Actually, when I was seven, my dad took me 293 00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:17,119 to the Natural History Museum in New York, 294 00:17:17,203 --> 00:17:18,662 and we looked at fossils all day. 295 00:17:18,746 --> 00:17:21,498 And at the end of the day, he got me a little plastic triceratops. 296 00:17:21,582 --> 00:17:23,125 It was awesome. 297 00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:26,962 That's cool. Hey, you know what's even cooler than triceratops? 298 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:30,048 Every other dinosaur that ever existed. 299 00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:32,843 Didn't see that one coming. 300 00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:41,476 It's deleted. 301 00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:46,314 She still has feelings for you. 302 00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:48,150 She said that? 303 00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:50,736 Is that what it said? What did it say? 304 00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:53,447 I can't tell you specifically, 305 00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:55,907 but it's not over. 306 00:17:56,409 --> 00:17:57,534 You're sure? 307 00:18:10,381 --> 00:18:11,506 Okay. 308 00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:18,013 Happy birthday. 309 00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:19,473 Happy birthday. Surprise. 310 00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:22,184 It's... Hey, hey, it's not a surprise. 311 00:18:23,186 --> 00:18:24,436 This doesn't look good. 312 00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:25,979 What? You have a cake. 313 00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:29,858 You have a delicious cake with your name spelled correctly? 314 00:18:32,195 --> 00:18:34,112 I told you. You haven't heard our theme, though. 315 00:18:34,197 --> 00:18:36,990 You don't hear a theme. You see it. 316 00:18:37,074 --> 00:18:38,784 Why is there a Chiclet on my cake? 317 00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:42,370 That's the best part. That represents a pillow. Or a television. 318 00:18:42,455 --> 00:18:43,747 Our theme, if you will. 319 00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:45,332 Because the fun part is you get to decide 320 00:18:45,416 --> 00:18:47,459 on an hour of television or an hour of napping. 321 00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:49,211 That's our theme. 322 00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:52,964 Cool. Yeah? 323 00:18:54,050 --> 00:18:55,550 I love it. 324 00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:57,135 Oh, yes! Okay, good. 325 00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:58,470 So what's it going to be, Kapoor? 326 00:18:58,554 --> 00:19:00,430 Can she pick a half hour of each? 327 00:19:00,515 --> 00:19:01,556 No. No. 328 00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,308 Then pick TV. 329 00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:05,060 - Pick a nap. - No, no. TV. 330 00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:07,771 Watching TV at work is really cool. 331 00:19:07,855 --> 00:19:09,898 Pick a nap. Nothing good is on right now. 332 00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:11,191 Bonnie Hunt is on. 333 00:19:11,275 --> 00:19:13,193 You know what? I have been watching TV all week. 334 00:19:13,277 --> 00:19:14,653 I choose nap. All right. 335 00:19:14,737 --> 00:19:18,406 Okay, nap it is. Everyone out! Get out. 336 00:19:18,491 --> 00:19:20,408 We're going to be eating cake at our desks. 337 00:19:20,535 --> 00:19:22,410 Let's go. Move it. 338 00:19:23,496 --> 00:19:26,748 Let's go, go, go, go, go, come on. I got this. 339 00:19:30,253 --> 00:19:34,923 This is for you. And happy birthday, Kell. 340 00:19:35,591 --> 00:19:36,967 Thank you. 341 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:44,683 Okay. You've got one hour. 342 00:19:47,770 --> 00:19:49,813 I'm too excited to sleep. 343 00:19:55,945 --> 00:19:56,945 Mmm. 344 00:19:57,780 --> 00:19:58,989 Great cake. 345 00:19:59,949 --> 00:20:01,199 Thanks. 346 00:20:14,881 --> 00:20:16,298 Birthday time is over. 347 00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:17,757 Now go make up for all the work you missed 348 00:20:17,842 --> 00:20:19,551 when you were taking your nap. 349 00:20:23,431 --> 00:20:25,265 Many happy returns. 350 00:20:30,479 --> 00:20:33,857 I feel great. So good to have closure. 351 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:37,569 We should go apologize to Roy or something. 352 00:20:37,653 --> 00:20:39,195 No. We don't need to do that. 353 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:42,449 Who have I wronged? Who have I wronged? 354 00:20:42,533 --> 00:20:43,742 Oh! Oh! 355 00:20:43,826 --> 00:20:46,077 What about that fat guy from Stamford that I insulted? 356 00:20:46,162 --> 00:20:48,663 We should find him. You mean Tony. 357 00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:51,166 Jabba the Hutt, Pizza the Hut. 358 00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:54,419 Fat guys like pizza, pepperoni pizza, Pepperoni Tony. 359 00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:55,670 Oh, Michael. 360 00:20:56,172 --> 00:21:01,051 Man, was he fat. So, so fat. 361 00:21:02,470 --> 00:21:03,845 You know what? Forget it. 362 00:21:03,930 --> 00:21:08,183 I know me. When I saw him I would never be able to apologize to him. 363 00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:14,356 Too fat. Big, fat fatty.